Just One More
by Aldea0402
Summary: Tony knew the moment Ziva's son was put in his arms, he had to change his shattered life. Can they move past all the half truths and misspoken thoughts and build a life together? Or will people from Ziva's past push them even further apart?
1. Chapter 1

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**This is my first attempt at an NCIS fic. I've only been watching the show for about six months, but instantly became a TIVA fan. However, lately I've been feeling melancholy about Tony and Ziva. It seems as if the writers have all but forgotten about their underlying relationship/chemistry, it's frustrating and making me sad.**

**I am going to endeavor to get this fic completed before I return to work. I am currently home on temporary disability for some weird neck/shoulder/arm ailment that has stumped the doctors. I don't know how long this story will be or how it will end. I just want some happiness for Ziva…**

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS. If I did, the script for "Obsession" would have been burned before it was even printed…..**

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****"Just One More….."**

Tony DiNozzo stood in the elevator watching the numbers light up as the car rose from the ground floor. Finally arriving at his intended destination, he walked down the hallway listening to the sounds of newborn infants and their excited new parents bustling about. He stopped briefly at the nursery and saw that it was empty. All of the babies were in their mother's rooms.

He reached room 420 and paused for a moment listening. Hearing silence he gently pushed open the door and shuffled inside. Glancing at the bed his breath hitched in his throat. Even in exhausted slumber, she was gorgeous.

Ziva had the blankets pulled up to her chin, her head angled slightly to the side. Her hair was full and curly gently framing her face. It seemed that no matter what state he saw Ziva in, her natural beauty always managed to take his breath away momentarily.

Trying not to wake the new mother, he walked over to the plastic crib. He smiled at the little face looking up at him with brown eyes that mirrored his mother's. "Hey Jacob." Tony whispered. The baby glanced at him momentarily before his eyes closed. Tony smirked. 'Ziva did all the work and you're the one exhausted.' He thought.

"Do you want to hold him?" Came a slightly accented voice from the other side of the room.

Tony turned a bit startled and relaxed when a soft light came on revealing the other occupant in the room. Tony's heart fell. But as was his practice, he quickly pulled on the veil that covered his actual emotions.

"Hey Josh, sorry I didn't know you were there." He said with a small smile.

Joshua Aaronson stood from the pull out cot he had been sleeping on and stretched. He flashed a tired smile. "I've been here since I brought Ziva in."

Tony glanced at the bed and again towards the crib. He forced a smile and stuck his hand out to Joshua. "Congratulations man. He's a beautiful boy."

Josh shook his hand warmly. "Thanks. He looks just like his mother." In the moment, Jacob opened his eyes and began to squirm. Before Josh could reach the crib Jacob's squirming had turned into grunts and then an all out cry.

Joshua picked the unhappy infant up and cradled him closely to his chest, bouncing him gently and making gentle 'shushing' sounds. "Sh-sh;sh little man. Let Ima get a little rest."

"Too late." Came the sleepy reply from the bed. Ziva smiled when all eyes in the room turned to her. "Tony, how long have you been here?" She asked wiping her eyes quickly and pushing her hair out of her face.

"Not long. I just wanted to stop by and get a look at the little guy that took my partner away from me." Tony said in a joking manner.

Ziva's face changed slightly as she looked away from Tony and over to Josh who was still handling the fussing baby.

"I think our little man wants his Mommy." She said holding her arms out. Josh smiled and walked over handing her the baby. "See that Tony. My son has good taste already. He likes being in the arms of beautiful women."

Once Ziva had the baby tucked safely in her arms, Joshua sat on the side of the bed moving until he was half laying at Ziva's side as they stared down at their newborn son.

Tony felt like an insider as he watched the happy family. He shifted his weight from foot to foot in an attempt to fight the urge to flee from the room and run away from the scene in front of him forever.

"Yeah… well…." He began.

Joshua turned his face to Tony. "Look at the bright side of things. Ziva's maternity leave will be over in twelve weeks. She'll be moved back to Gibbs' team and everything will be back to normal."

Tony and Ziva's eyes locked. 'It'll never be the same again.' Tony thought sadly.

"Well, uh… I've gotta run." Tony stepped over and shook Joshua's hand warmly. "Congratulations again." He bent down and kissed Ziva gently on the cheek. "He's beautiful Ziva." He whispered gently before spinning on his heel and disappearing out the door.

Josh and Ziva stared momentarily at the closed door before he turned to Ziva, his eyebrow raised in question.

Ziva shook her head. "Not now." She warned him.

He smiled and raised his hands in surrender. "I'm not saying a word." He simply stated.

To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the reviews and story alerts. You made my day! **

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS. If I did, the script for "Obsession" would have been burned before it was even printed…..**

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**"Just One More….." Part 2**

"So, Ziva had the baby, huh?"

Tony winced when he heard the familiar voice behind him. He was still sitting on the barstool he'd deposited himself on shortly after leaving the hospital. Now, several hours and a forgotten number of drinks later, it would figure the bartender would have called someone to give him a ride home.

"She did. He looks just like her." He replied.

The didn't turn around but felt a body slipping into the barstool next to him. Instead, he picked up his half-empty drink and finished it in one swallow.

"So, are you here to babysit me?" He asked in disgust.

Jimmy Palmer bit back the urge to shrink back from Tony's snipe. Instead, he nodded to the bartender, a long time friend of his, and motioned with one finger for a drink. "I figured you wanted me to. Why else would you come to this bar?" He asked Tony quietly.

Tony chucked and picked up his empty glass and tipped it in Jimmy's direction. "Cheers!" He gulped from the glass flinching when nothing but ice cubes smacked him in the mouth. He frowned looking at the glass as if it was his worst enemy.

Palmer sighed. "Tony-" He began.

DiNozzo slammed the glass on the bar. "Hey Mike, we're empty over here!" He yelled loudly. Palmer threw a look at Mike that said 'I'm sorry'. Mike didn't seem to care, walking over he placed a 7-Up in front of Palmer and a cup of coffee in front of Tony.

"Oh, come one Mike, I'm flagged? Seriously?" Tony asked.

Mike moved in the other direction to attend to other customers.

Palmer tried again. "Tony, how long are you going to do this to yourself?"

Tony sighed as he added cream and a ton of sugar to his coffee. He looked at Palmer and shook his head. "You know, this is where it all fell apart?"

Palmer sipped his soda. "What fell apart?"

Tony stared into his coffee. "Everything… my life."

Palmer shook his head. "What are you talking about Tony?"

Tony's attention had turned to an empty booth on the other side of the bar. In his hazy brain he could still see him and Ziva sitting there having the discussion that ruined his life. They were almost like shadows, ghosts of the people they had been then. One minute, wrapped around one another on the dance floor, the next she slammed the door to her heart so quickly that now, sixteen months later, it still hurt.

"I love her Palmer." Tony admitted simply.

Jimmy didn't need to ask. "I know."

"How in the hell did it get this bad? How did I **LET** it get this bad?" Tony wondered out loud.

Palmer sat silently, not able to provide an answer. Tony smirked at him. "When you find her, that girl that takes your breath away, the one that makes you want to be with her every minute of every day, don't hide it. Don't dance around it. Just grab her and don't let go." Tony poked him in the chest to reiterate his point.

Palmer swallowed. "I won't. I mean I will. I mean…."

Tony smiled. "Don't ever change Palmer. Let me finish my coffee and you can take me the hell home."

Palmer smiled feeling like he'd been let off the hook.

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Ziva smiled down at the little bundle in her arms. She felt that she was finally getting used to breast feeding the baby. The lactation nurse had shown her a few different methods of getting the baby to latch on, however none seemed to work. 'My son would have to be different.' She thought. After several failed attempts, she and Jacob had come to a mutual understanding. The last two feeding sessions had been much easier.

There was a soft knock on the door. Ziva shifted a nursing blanket over to cover the baby as he fed and turned a bit towards the door. "Come in." she called quietly.

She was shocked when the wave of dark hair came in the door, arms filled with bags, balloons and flowers. "How did you get here so quickly?" Ziva exclaimed in excitement.

With all the gifts tossed into a nearby chair, Ziva's visitor was finally free to zip across the room. "Well, I was on my way from Tel Aviv to here to surprise you during the last two weeks of your pregnancy. Someone had other ideas."

Ziva smiled at her best friend. She used her free hand to lift the blanket off of the baby who was still nursing greedily with his eyes closed. "Oh my God Ziva, he's beautiful."

Ziva smiled proudly and nodded. "I could have done without the eleven hours of labor but…. It was worth it." She glanced lovingly down at the baby.

"Looks like he's fallen asleep. Here, let me have him." Ziva used her pinky to break the baby's hold on her breast and handed him to Eden.

"Hello little one. I'm your Aunt Eden. We've been waiting for you for so long." She told Jacob as she shifted him to her shoulder. Ziva fixed her hospital gown and shifted around in the bed.

"How are you feeling?" Eden asked her.

"A little sore. They offered me something but I do not feel that bad." Ziva said as she pushed herself up from her hospital bed and moved to her overnight bag. "Will you be okay while I go change? I have clothes from home." Ziva asked.

Eden smirked. "We'll be fine. I love you to death Ziva but I really don't need to see your ass hanging out of the back of your gown."

Ziva smiled. "Be happy that is all I have hanging out." She said pulling out a T-Shirt and sweats to change into.

"Well, as a matter of fact… when I first came in-" Eden started.

"Okay, okay. Just do not drop my son on the floor." Ziva laughed as she went into the bathroom.

"Would it matter? I mean, he'd got your Mossad Ninja genes and Joshua's hard head. This boy is set for life!" Eden decided.

Ziva came out smiling, albeit sadly. Eden noticed that change in her demeanor. "Where is Josh?" She asked.

"I made him go home and get some rest. He was exhausted and that cot is uncomfortable." Silence enveloped the room.

"Well, if you didn't notice, I brought gifts!" Eden exclaimed using her head to point at all the bags in the chair. Ziva smiled and walked over.

"You did not have to do this." She said.

"Are you kidding? We've been best friends since we were four years old. You're the first one of us to settle down and have a family. Of course I HAD to!"

Ziva moved the flowers over to her bedside table where several bouquets sat from her former team at NCIS. "Wow, look at Miss Popular."

Ziva shot her a withering glance. She began pointing out bouquets. "These are from the linguistics team I have been working with the last few months. These are from Ducky, Gibbs, those from Palmer, and these are from McGee. The gift basket over there is from Abby."

Eden frowned. "Nothing from Tony."

Ziva didn't reply, just shook her head. "He stopped by earlier."

Eden looked down at the sleeping infant in her arms and stood to place him in his crib. "How did that go?"

Ziva didn't answer. Instead she busied herself with rummaging through the gift bags she had moved over to her bed.

To Be Continued…


	3. Chapter 3

**You guys are really blowing me away, not only by the reviews but the Story Alerts as well. Thanks so much! I know everyone has questions... trust me, a lot will be answered in the coming days. And who knows, maybe if the reviewers are nice, I'll post another chapter later today since this one is short. **

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS. If I did, the script for "Obsession" would have been burned before it was even printed…..**

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**"Just One More….." **

**Part 3**

Eden sat back in her chair next to Ziva's bed, glancing at her friend who was sleeping soundly. Since the baby was sleeping, she and Joshua had encouraged Ziva to sleep as well. Ziva protested at first, but was asleep within minutes of laying down.

"You should have seen her Eden, she was amazing." Josh beamed. "No drugs, nothing. If the pain got too intense, she'd hop out of bed and walk around, breathing through the contractions. It was incredible."

Eden smirked. "She probably used Mossad techniques to get through it."

Josh raised an eyebrow. "Mossad trained you on how to get through pain?"

She nodded. "Mossad taught us how to get through a lot of things." She said darkly.

"And you're really done with it?" He questioned her.

She smiled. "From Mossad assassin to nanny in the matter of a year." She laughed causing him to smile.

"It really means a lot to us that you wanted to be part of this." He told her.

She sighed, adjusting in the uncomfortable hospital chair before speaking. "We've all known each other since we were a few years older than Jacob. How could I not be part of it?"

"And Eli let you go?"

She shrugged. "Not much he could do. She pointed to her leg. Gunshot wound. Caused nerve damage. I'll have recurrent problems my entire life. I'm not suited to go back into the field."

Josh thought for a moment. "And who better to watch Jacob than a Mossad assassin who can protect him against anyone who would want to hurt him."

Eden glanced at the baby. "I don't think Eli will bother. Not unless he wants to cause an international incident with NCIS. He won't risk it. He needs them too much."

"But just in case-"

"Just in case, I will be ready."

They were quiet for a moment. "You know, in a way I sort of wished he would." Eden threw a shocked expression in his direction. "I'd love to see Eli face off against Gibbs." He joked.

Eden smiled devilishly. "So Ziva's description of Gibbs wasn't exaggerated?"

He laughed. "If anything, I think it was watered down."

Eden's eyes widened. "Interesting. Well I can't wait to meet the gang from NCIS."

"Including Tony?" He asked.

She nodded. "Especially Tony."

Joshua stood and walked over to glance down at the baby. He then reached over and smoothed a couple of curls from Ziva's face.

Ziva stirred a bit in her sleep and whispered one single, solitary word. "Tony."

Eden's eyebrows raised. Josh simply sighed. "Eden, now that you're here, you have to help me."

Eden, knowing full well what he meant, asked anyway. "Help you with what?"

He moved over and sat in the chair next to her. "Before I go, we have to fix this." Eden smiled sadly and reached an arm over wrapping it around his shoulders and pulling him into a hug.

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Tony cursed the slow moving elevator at NCIS Headquarters. Glancing again at his watch, he slammed his finger into the call button.

8:35.

Late again.

'Please don't let Gibbs be in the bullpen.'

The door finally opened into the orange bullpen that had become Tony's home. Rushing to his desk he threw his bag on the floor and flopped into his chair, grateful that he didn't see Gibbs anywhere. McGee raised his eyes from his keyboard and looked sadly at Tony. He didn't bother to acknowledge Tony's presence. He knew there would be no response.

Tony barely had his computer logged on when Gibbs' moved briskly across the bullpen.

"DiNozzo, my office." Gibbs didn't miss a step as he crossed in front of Tony moving towards the elevator. Tony followed him slowly, knowing full well that McGee would be staring. Tony waited in the elevator silently until Gibbs reached over and flipped the emergency stop button. The light went off and the elevator grinded to a halt.

Tony refused to look Gibbs in the eye, even when the senior agent's nose was pressed practically into his cheek.

"Boss-" Tony began.

"Save it DiNozzo."

Tony was quiet again choosing to stare down at his shoes. Gibbs stepped back and took a drink of coffee. After several moments of silence Gibbs spoke again.

"You have to move past it DiNozzo.'

Tony sighed. He spoke quietly. "I lost what could have been the best thing in my life boss."

Gibbs spoke softly in a tone that Tony had heard his hardly ever use. "You haven't lost anything DiNozzo. You have a home, a job, your car. You have to pull it together."

Tony cleared his throat unable to admit to Gibbs exactly what he meant. Gibbs reached over and started the elevator again. As the door opened, Gibbs began walking out, his tone all business. "She'll be sitting across from you again in twelve weeks." He pointed out and he strode across the bullpen.

Tony sighed before following behind him. 'That's what I'm afraid of.' He thought.

To Be Continued


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS, if I did we'd have more scenes like last night in interrogation when Tony had his arm around Ziva. **

**Author's Note: I seriously did not mean for this story to be as mysterious as it has become. LOL When I write, I generally see a few scenes in my head, attempt to get them down in print and build around them. I don't plot, I don't plan, I just type. So, keep peppering me with questions. It means I have your attention!**

**So sorry I didn't post a chapter yesterday. I had physical therapy and began to fret if we would get any Tiva in last night's episode. I was happy. I mean, it wasn't them naked together in bed declaring their undying love for each other... but I'll take it. **

**So, here's a little chapter that hopefully will begin to fill in some of the mystery. I'll write more as soon as my Phillies finish beating the Reds for Game 1. LOL**

**Episode references in this chapter: "Shalom" and "The Spider and the Fly"**

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"Just One More….." Part 4

"I thought there would be more time." Ziva whispered softly. She was laying on her side in her hospital bed, Josh next to her. Jacob was nestled tightly against Josh's chest while Ziva rested against his shoulder.

"I did too. But, apparently someone has other plans for me." He replied. He felt her breathing change as he looked down at her. "Don't get upset Ziva, please."

"Don't get upset?" She exclaimed causing Jacob to begin to stir. Taking a deep breath she breathed deeply to calm her emotions.

"I can speak to the Director, change my return to work date-" She began.

"No." He said emphatically. "He's already been generous enough to allow you to extend your maternity leave with unused personal time. You don't want to push it, not if you want to be placed back on Gibbs' team."

She smiled softly. "I cannot be stuck behind a desk any longer."

"Exactly. You may need that time later down the road anyway." He told her, using his chin to gesture down at the baby. They remained silent for several moments, both intent to watch the baby sleep. He then added, "Assuming all goes well with the pediatrician today, you guys will be discharged. We can talk more at home."

She thought for a few moments. Then added, "Of course we will be released. He is perfect." She said with a smile.

He laughed softly and bent his head to kiss her on top of the head. "Oh without a doubt." He agreed.

Ziva turned her head to look at Josh. "I love you for everything."

He smiled and hugged her tightly.

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Outside in the hallway, Tony felt as if he was on a roller coaster and had just sped to the bottom of the biggest hill.

His morning had started out so well. After his 'pep talk' from Gibbs (or the closest thing to a pep talk you would ever get from Gibbs), Tony had gone directly home from work. He'd straightened his apartment, even cooked dinner. Well, he took it out of the freezer and microwaved it, but the fact that his food hadn't come from a local bar was a major step.

After dinner, he'd gone online and caught up on personal e-mails, most from some of his college buddies that he hadn't spoken to in weeks. Finally, he settled into his favorite chair and put his Magnum P. I. DVDs on for a nice little marathon.

His thoughts had strayed to Ziva and how she used to join him for 'movie night' as they had called it. That had stopped abruptly shortly before Gibbs' return from his sabbatical in Mexico. At the time, Tony couldn't figure out what had happened or what had gone wrong. Ziva was at his apartment the night before the bombing at the café. Once the Iranian spy had been arrested and Gibbs had departed again for Mexico, Tony had expected Ziva over the following week. He already had the movie picked out, had stopped and bought snacks and Ziva's favorite drinks for the night. However, she didn't show up. Tony had called her to make sure she was okay. She'd answered her phone quickly but had stated that she didn't feel up to it. Later in the week when Tony had tried to arrange their next movie night, she blew him off.

They never had another movie night again.

Tony knew that he should have pushed her. He should have found out what he had done to make her not want to spend time with him outside of work, but he didn't. He instead made one of the poorest choices in his life, he sunk himself even further into his undercover assignment with Jeanne.

But now, years later, he could admit to himself that he missed their private time together. He loved having her over his apartment or being at hers, just the two of them. The intimate dinners, sitting on the sofa side by side. Sometimes, they'd sit so close he could smell the scent of her shampoo, imagine what it would be like to have fingers buried in her hair as he kissed her senseless.

He wondered if this would be what their life would be like if they were in a romantic relationship. Rule 12 no longer applied, Gibbs wasn't their team leader anymore. But before Tony could work up the courage to broach the subject, that door had been rather harshly slammed.

Now this morning, Tony had woken extra early. He wanted to stop by the hospital to see Ziva before going into work. He also wanted to beat Gibbs into the office and get started on their backlogged paperwork just to show him that he **was** trying.

He didn't expect to hear what he'd heard outside of Ziva's partially open hospital door. He didn't know why it hurt him like it did. Josh and Ziva had been a couple for a while at this point. As far as Tony knew, their relationship began while she was in Miami following up on leads during the Reynosa case.

Tony had been pleased when he didn't hear mention of Ziva's mystery man too often. He would catch her reading e-mails or text messages and smiling, however it didn't seem too serious.

And then that fateful day came. Ziva had been acting strange, almost as if she was distracted. She was quiet, and kept fidgetting at her desk. Director Vance had just returned from a meeting when he motioned for Ziva. "Agent David, we can have that meeting you requested now." Ziva tossed a look over at Gibbs who nodded to her supportingly. 'He knows what's going on.' Tony thought.

Ziva had been gone for approximately half an hour. Gibbs had been called into the meeting approximately ten minutes in. They were smiling as they returned to the bullpen. Ziva did everything she could not to look at Tony or McGee when she returned to her desk.

Gibbs had been quiet for several minutes before he made he gathered the team around. "Agent David will be transferring to the linguistics team for a short period of time. We're not going to transfer another agent in unless the workflow gets too heavy for us." Tony and McGee both turned their attention to Ziva waiting for further explanation. She smiled to the two of them, but did not speak up.

Tony had opened his mouth to begin to ask the question on both his and McGee's minds, however the glare from Gibbs made him close it again quickly. The day after the mysterious meeting, Ziva was off the MCRT.

It didn't take long for Tony to put the clues together. He saw her a few days later as she had been assigned to MTAC. Gibbs and Tony were in MTAC listening to recordings of a possible terrorist cell plotting to attack U.S. ships in the Gulf of Mexico. At one point, there was a break in the action. Tony had glanced over at Ziva and caught her hand resting on her belly.

'Come to think of it, she has been wearing baggy shirts lately…' his mind had started to wonder. 'No, stop it DiNozzo.' But later in the day, his initial impulsive thought had been confirmed.

He caught her drinking a carton of milk in the break area. He flopped into a chair across from her and looked her in the eye.

"When is the baby due?" He'd asked her, using every ounce of strength in his being to keep his voice even.

She didn't even look surprised that he'd figured it out. Her eyes narrowed gently but then she smiled softly. "Twenty four weeks.'

Tony's mind began swirling. He could have sworn he felt physical pain in soul. He forced himself to look at her.

She was happy. She was glowing.

Tony forced himself to his feet. He bent at the waist and kissed her on the cheek. "Congratulations beautiful."

He exited the room quickly, pausing only once to glance back at Ziva. Wishful thinking led him to believe he saw tears in her eyes. However, his heart told him that was indeed, not the case.

Now, standing outside of her room he had to put that same mask in place before he could enter Ziva's room and face the new parents.

To Be Continued


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS, if I did the episode "Jetlag" would have been a two-parter with all questions answered... **

_**Italics **_**indicate a flashback.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 5

Tony rapped softly on the door before pushing it open. Ziva raised her head and smiled when she saw who it was. "Tony, what are you doing here so early?"

He forced a smile that he did not feel and swallowed hard. "I thought I'd stop by before work. It's been busy lately." He choked out.

Josh smiled and nudged Ziva with his free elbow. "I think that's a hint that he wants you back to work soon." He teased. "Well, I have to get going-" He began moving Jacob to his other arm before handing him over to Ziva. "I'll be back later with the car seat. "

Ziva settled the baby in her arms and dropped her head on to the pillows behind her. "Oh, I cannot wait to get out of here."

He laughed and bent to kiss the baby on the head. As he stood he swayed briefly quickly grabbing the rail of Ziva's bed to steady himself.

Tony came forward quickly placing a hand on his back to steady him. "Hey, you okay?" Ziva watched the scene, concern written on her face.

"Yeah, I'm just really tired. It's been a busy few days." He said throwing a smile to Tony. He then looked at Ziva again. "I'll see you guys later."

She nodded but did not reply. Josh smiled at Tony one more time before exiting the room. Tony watched him go and then turned his attention back to Ziva. She was studying the baby intently.

"He has an appointment this early in the morning?" He questioned.

Her gaze immediately hardened. "Tony-" She warned.

He put his hands up in mock surrender and took a chance, sitting next to her on the bed so he could look at the baby closer. "Well, I'll give you guys credit, you did make one hell of a cute kid."

"Tony stop."

"Stop what?"

She took a deep breath. "It is impossible for me to have an adult conversation with you when it comes to my relationship with Joshua-" She began.

"Ziva, I was only teasing you."

She again took a breath and looked away from him. "Were you teasing that night at McClain's?" She asked quietly.

Tony looked at her strangely. His face fell. He quickly forced a fake smile. "It's weird you should mention that. Palmer and I were just there a couple of nights ago. I was thinking about that night."

"I have thought about it many times." She replied.

They were quiet for several moments. "Ziva, I don't understand what happened to us."

She looked at him strangely. "There was no 'us' Tony. We were friends… partners."

"Were?" He asked.

She ignored him. "We had too much to drink. Things got a little out of control-" She stopped.

"A little?"

"Okay, a lot. Could you imagine if Gibbs' had walked in on us?" She asked.

_The two of them had met up with Abby, Tim, Ducky and Palmer for a much needed happy hour after a particularly brutal case. Drinks had turned to shots which turned to Ziva and Abby attracting many men on the dance floor as they danced together._

_Abby had exited the floor to try to lure McGee out leaving Ziva surrounded by no less than six men as she danced with no one in particular. Tony immediately felt the need to rush to her rescue. He elbowed his way through the crowd until he reached her._

_She smiled brightly at him and announced to everyone "Look it's Tony!" The single men took the hint immediately and backed off. Tony, feeling the effects of the alcohol he'd consumed himself, put his arm around her._

_"Maybe you should take a break Ziva." He attempted to lead her off the dance floor but she refused to budge. Using one arm he tried to move her again causing her to fall against his chest._

_Her hands were planted firmly on his chest and their eyes locked. For all Tony knew, they were the only two people left on the planet. The entire universe, his entire being were in her eyes at that moment. The music changed to a slow song. Ziva began to sway gently back and forth. Tony, still mesmerized by the moment, began to move with her._

_As the song continued her head had managed to find his chest as her arms wound around his back. They stayed in their own universe several minutes before she raised her head to look into his face. "I knew I would get you out here sooner or later."_

_"Oh, so this was a ploy to take advantage of me in my drunken state?" He asked._

_"What if it was?" She asked with a sly smile on her face._

_Tony's stomach clenched. 'She's teasing. She has to be. Two can play this game' he thought._

_"Well gee Ziva, I don't know. What would your mystery man think?" He asked smugly._

_Big mistake. He immediately felt her stiffen before she abruptly pulled out of his arms. She glared at him and walked pointedly towards the booth where their teammates sat. She didn't say a word to anyone, just grabbed her belongings and began to leave._

_Tony was stunned momentarily but rushed to catch up to her before she got out of the door. He grabbed her arm and spun her around. "Hey, what the hell is wrong with you?"_

_She looked away from him forcing tears back from her eyes. Tony wasn't used to seeing her this emotional, he was taken back momentarily. "That is something I've been wondering for my whole life Tony. Why can you not let me be happy?"_

_He was speechless. He was not used to this sort of outburst from Ziva. Nor did he have a clue what had prompted it. "Ziva-" He began in an attempt to diffuse the situation._

_"What Tony? Let me guess, you are worried about me. I am your friend and you care about me."_

_"Yeah, but Ziva-"_

_"You do not want me but you do not want anyone else to have me either. Is that it?"_

_"Ziva no-"_

_She pulled away from him again. "I cannot do this with you Tony, not again." And with that, she exited the door._

"Things got out of control pretty quick, huh?" He asked ignoring her question about Gibbs catching them.

"Yes, they did. I owed you yet another apology and I had no idea how to even begin-"

"Hey, you didn't owe me an apology. We had been drinking. Words can easily be taken out of context."

She shook her head. "Even afterwards. I pushed you away."

Tony was silent for a moment. He took her free hand in his and studied it before smiling. "We seem to do that a lot. What's the name of that song?"

She smiled. "One step forward, two steps back." She said.

He laughed gently. "Well, obviously your relationship with Josh became more serious shortly after so-." He gestured to the baby as if Jacob was proof positive that he was right.

Ziva looked down at the baby. "Tony, there are many things you do not know." She said softly.

"You Miss Ziva David have always been one big mystery to me. I know that you have your private life. You have your secrets. I just… I want our friendship back."

Tony's heart dropped when she pulled her hand way from him. He looked up at her and was surprised that she was using her free hand to wipe tears from her eyes.

"Hormones." She sniffed.

He smiled. "Super Ninja's don't cry. I promise your secret is safe with me." He swore.

She laughed. "I am not a super ninja Tony. I am just me." She said. She looked thoughtful for a moment before she added. "I do not want to have secrets from you Tony." She said.

"So, tell me your deepest, darkest secret." He chided.

She laughed. "Not here in front of my son."

Tony chuckled. "Oh yes, virgin ears and all."

"Do you want to hold him?" She asked suddenly.

"Uh no Ziva- he's too small." He started.

She sat up sharply. "You won't break him Tony."

"Uh-yeah…" he stuttered.

She smiled. "Here, just hold him close to you. He will let you know if he is uncomfortable."

"What if I'm uncomfortable?" He asked.

"You'll be fine." She promised.

She moved Jacob into Tony's arms and moved her hands away slowly. Tony tried holding the baby as gently as he could but began to panic when the baby started to squirm. "Uh Ziva-"

"Just relax. He is sensing your anxiety." She said softly.

Tony took a deep breath and pulled the baby a little tighter to his chest. Jacob immediately settled and pulled his little hands up in front of his face.

Tony stared down at the baby. "Wow." He whispered.

Ziva smiled. "Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo brought down by an eight pound, four ounce infant. Do not worry Tony, your secret is safe with me" She teased.

Tony smiled back at her feeling more confident in his ability with the baby. "He's not just any baby. He's **your** baby." He emphasized.

Ziva felt that familiar warmth that only Tony could cause permeate her being. 'Not again Ziva. Do not let him do this to you again.' She swore to herself.

"Tony, are you going to make it to work on time?" She asked.

He glanced at the clock on the wall. "Yeah, I need to go." He said but continued to stare down at the bundle in his arms.

Ziva smiled. "Tony, do not give Gibbs a reason to be angry with you." She said.

'Too late.' He thought. He shifted his arms a bit allowing Ziva to take Jacob back. "I heard Josh say you guys are going home today?" He asked.

"Yes, if the pediatrician gives him a clean bill of health."

"Ah, he's perfect." Tony stated.

She smiled again. "I will call you. Maybe we can have a movie night soon?" She asked.

Tony's heart clenched. "I promise I won't be a stranger." He said. He bent down to Jacob. "Take care little man. Give your Mommy hell." He said.

Jacob didn't bother opening his eyes. Ziva however smacked Tony in the arm. "Tony!" She exclaimed laughing.

He flashed a 1000-watt DiNozzo smile at Ziva and exited the room. For the first time in a very long time, he felt happiness.

To Be Continued


	6. Chapter 6

**So sorry that I haven't posted any in the last few days. There's no excuse, just pure laziness on my part.**

**Thank you so much for the reviews, story alerts, etc. It is much appreciated and has my muse going at full blast. This is just a small chapter that should begin to answer some questions. (I hope LOL)**

**Disclaimer- I don't own NCIS, maybe if next year's tax return is really big…..**

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**"Just One More….." Part 6**

Eden angled Josh's car into the parking stall at the hospital. Killing the engine, she looked over at the passenger and smiled. "We're here!" She announced.

He looked at her suspiciously. "Great, now I can open my eyes. I don't know who's the worst driver, you or Ziva."

She laughed. "Well, I do it on purpose. She does it because… well, she's Ziva."

Josh smiled softly as he reached down to unbuckle his safety belt. Eden reached over and placed a hand over his. "Are you okay? You don't look too good."

He sat back in his car seat and took a deep breath. "I don't know Eden. I really don't. When Ziva and I started this whole crazy plan we thought there was a lot of time. Now that's changed."

Eden sat silently for a moment. "Changed how?"

He didn't meet her gaze and instead looked down at their joined hands. "I probably won't even be around to see the baby take his first steps."

Eden's emotions boiled but she forced herself to remain calm. She squeezed his hand tightly. "Well then, we're going to have to make everyday count. Ziva is strong. She'll get through this. She'll never let Jacob forget you."

He smiled. "I know. You'll be here for her. I just don't want to go without knowing she's happy."

"Have you seen the way she beams at that baby? You gave her part of the dream she's always wanted."

He nodded. "Part. But her life still isn't the perfect fairytale we dreamed about when we were children."

Eden smiled and slapped his hand gently. "Well in case you haven't noticed, none of our lives have turned out that way. Think about it. When we were ten years old we all had these grandiose dreams for ourselves. Ziva can still have that. We just need to work quicker!" She decided causing him to smile.

He nodded. "Let's go spring them from this joint."

She smiled and popped the trunk before exiting the car. As she pulled out the brand new car seat she took a deep breath to force back the tears.

Once she was calmer, she closed the trunk loudly and looked at the passenger door to see Josh exiting the car slowly. "Hey, are you okay?" She asked coming around the car.

He didn't answer her at first. He stood slowly and then closed the door behind him. Looking at her he sadly replied; "We need to hurry Eden."

She knew what he meant. "Let's go get that adorable baby and his cranky mother before Ziva starts using her assassination techniques on the nurses."

He laughed as the made their way to the front door. Eden obtained her visitor's pass as the security guard checked Josh's hospital band proclaiming him a new father and allowing him easier access to the maternity ward. With security pass in hand, she went to join Josh at the elevator and noticed that he was leaning heavily against the wall as if it was holding him up.

She entered the newly arrived elevator car and waited for him to join her. They rode to the fourth floor in silence. The ding of the elevator startled her a bit as she was lost in thought.

As the door opened, she exited first and said over her shoulder; "I can't wait until we get the baby home. That's when the real fun begins. No nurses to come and take him to the nursery so Ziva can rest." She laughed. She was barely out of the elevator when she heard the unmistakable sound of a body hitting the floor.

Dropping the car seat she rushed to her collapsed friend seeing that his eyes were closed and his skin a ghastly white color. Before she could even call for help, several nurses came rushing from behind the nurses station pushing Eden out of the way to administer aid.

As the nurses checked his vitals Eden caught the attention of one who was standing by in case needed. "He's a patient of Dr. Boyd's down in oncology." She told her.

An orderly rushed forward with a gurney. As the loaded Josh on and disappeared back into the elevator. Eden was split in what to do. Picking up the abandoned car seat she ran as fast as she could to Ziva's room to tell her the bad news.

To Be Continued…


	7. Chapter 7

**Wow, you guys are blowing me away with the reviews and story alerts. Thank you so very much. After not having written fanfic for almost three years, and never having attempted a NCIS fic, it really means a lot that so many are enjoying my ramblings so far.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Sorry Shane Brennone, we will not go away quietly.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 7**

Ziva sighed loudly as the young girl in the red and white striped dress pushed her slowly from the elevator on to the bustling oncology floor at the hospital. Because she had not been officially discharged yet, she had to travel by wheelchair although she felt perfectly capable of walking on her own two feet.

'Just be happy that the nurses made special arrangements for you.' She swore to herself. The nurses in the maternity ward had taken pity on her and the current situation she was in. While Jacob was being given his discharge exam by the pediatrician in the nursery, they had arranged to have a candy striper wheel her down to visit Joshua who had been admitted just hours earlier.

Arriving at his room she noted the subtle differences between this floor and the one she had been a guest of for the last forty eight hours. Most notably, this room didn't have a door. She pondered the reason for that momentarily before she was wheeled closer to Joshua's bed.

She gasped audibly throwing a shocked expression to Eden who was sitting in the chair on the opposite side of the room. Ziva had noticed Josh's lack of energy in the last few weeks. But it had become especially apparent in the last few days. His skin, normally a healthy olive color rivaling her own, had become paler. Now he resembled someone who had been dipped in flour before being deposited into his bed.

I.V.s hung with a slow, steady drip running into his arm. He also had a nasal cannula in his nose allowing him more oxygen to breath a bit easier. The young girl reached down to put the parking brake on the wheelchair before offering a hand to help Ziva stand.

"Just have the nurses call when you're ready to come down to your room. I'll come by to get you." She said cheerfully with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.

'Even at her young age, she can see how bad this is.'

"I will. Thank you." Ziva said. The sound of her voice caused Josh's eyes to open and he weakly moved his head in her direction. "Hey, what did you bribe a kid to help you escape?" He joked as the candy striper left the room.

Ziva smiled but it quickly dropped from her face. Walking to his bedside, she took his hand in hers. "Oh Joshua-" She started. No one in the room said anything for several moments before Eden spoke up. "Well, you know how it goes Ziva. He couldn't let you get all of the attention. He had to grab some of the spot light."

Josh looked over at Eden and smiled. " That's all this is. A ploy to get sympathy from beautiful women. It's working like a charm."

Ziva shook her head. "What am I going to do with you?" She asked.

He took a deep breath before speaking. "There's nothing anyone can do at this point. The doctors want to attempt chemotherapy again. It won't do anything but extend my life for a few months at the most."

"It will allow you more time with Jacob." She stated simply.

He shook his head. "Whether I die today or a month from now, Jacob won't remember me. Sure he'll have stories and pictures from the day he was born. But I will never have a chance to be the father I wanted to be for him."

Ziva's eyes filled with tears which she allowed to fall freely down her face. "What am I going to do without you?" She asked quietly. Eden noticed Ziva's state and walked up behind her, placing a hand on her back and guiding her to sit on the edge of the bed next to Josh.

"Ziva, you're so strong. You don't need me, not anymore." He whispered to her. Ziva used her one free hand to take Eden's while her other was still locked tightly in Josh's grasp.

Josh laid his head back onto the pillows before turning his attention to the two women in the world who meant the most to him. "Ziva, we took a gamble. For the two of us, it paid off in different ways. I was there to see our son born. I was given two wonderful days with him. Although I would love to see him grow, live his life, we knew back before you were pregnant that it probably wouldn't happen. You've wanted to have children since I can remember. You used to carry Tali around like she was a doll. I was able to give you that child you always wanted. He's the luckiest little boy on this planet to have you as a mother. Embrace that as my final gift to you."

Both women were crying openly at this point. Eden had moved her arm to around Ziva's shoulders allowing Ziva to lean into her. "It just seems so unfair. From the minute we all became friends when we were four years old, Ziva and I were always the risk takers. Joining the army, then Mossad, this one here becoming a hot shot U.S agent-" She nudged Ziva for emphasis, "And you're going to be gone before any of us."

Josh's eyes closed for a few moments. Opening them again he smiled, "Well, to be honest. Trying to take care of the two of you from here is too much. It'll be much easier sitting on a cloud playing a harp. And Jacob, should we start a betting pool on how many emergency room visits Ziva will have between now and the time he's eighteen?"

Ziva had to smile at the thought. "Speaking of Jacob, he is being given his discharge check from the doctor as we speak."

Eden separated herself from her friends and began to wipe at her eyes. "I'll give you a ride home and come back when you're settled at home." She began.

Ziva shook her head emphatically. "No. It is okay. Stay with Josh. I can get a ride." She stated.

Ziva looked over at Josh and noticed that he had fallen back to sleep. Eden looked as if she was going to argue but Ziva stopped her. "If something should happen today, I do not want him to be alone." She whispered.

She leaned down and kissed Joshua on the forehead tenderly causing his eyes to flutter open again. "As soon as the doctor says that it is okay, I will bring Jacob to see you."

Josh smiled weakly. "I can't wait."

* * *

Gibbs squinted at the papers in front of him. It had been a quiet day in the bullpen and for once, he was enjoying it. He had been pleasantly surprised when he'd arrived this morning at 0715 to see DiNozzo hard at work. His mood had changed drastically from yesterday. He wasn't sullen or angry. As a matter of fact, he seemed…. Happy… for the first time in a long time.

'He must have spoken to Ziva.' Gibbs mused to himself.

Tossing back a drink of coffee he sighed when his desk phone rang. 'So much for my quiet day,' He thought.

"Gibbs" He answered the phone gruffly.

"Hello Gibbs." Came the familiar voice from the other end of the line.

"Ziver. How are you?" He asked happily causing Tony and McGee to look up from their work.

"I am fine Gibbs." Came her quick reply. He voice however, told him a different story. Gibbs lowered his voice considerably. "Is something wrong with the baby?" He asked.

"No no, He's fine. The pediatrician just gave him a clean bill of health and discharged us. It's just… I need a favor."

"Name it." He answered quickly.

As he listened to Ziva's tale of the last ten hours of her life, his heart sank. "You two need a ride home." He surmised. "I'll be there in twenty minutes." He said briskly and disconnected the line before allowing her time to answer.

He stood quickly from his desk not failing to notice that Tony had heard the last part of their conversation. "Something you need DiNozzo?" He asked.

"No- I- Uh…"

Gibbs brushed him off. "I'll be gone for the rest of the day." Grabbing his coffee and personal belongings he began to stride quickly towards the elevator.

"Hey Boss-" Tony yelled.

Gibbs spun gearing up to lay into Dinozzo when he noticed Tony's car keys flying through the air in his direction. He grabbed them with his free hand as he eyed Tony carefully.

"You can't put an infant car seat in your truck Boss. I'll get a ride home with McGee." Tony explained.

Without responding Gibbs turned and began his journey towards the elevator again. As he began to enter he called out "There's hope for you yet DiNozzo."

To Be Continued


	8. Chapter 8

**OMG, how about that TIVA-Filled episode last night? I'm still all mushy! ::sigh:: Tony and Ziva are the best, no doubt about it.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 8**

Tony stepped quickly off the elevator outside of autopsy, an extra spring in his step. He peered into the autopsy bay and saw Palmer bent over some reports at Ducky's desk while the Medical Examiner spoke to him from across the room.

He entered autopsy silently trying to not draw the attention of Ducky. Walking briskly to where Jimmy was sitting, Tony silently sat a bag filled with Jimmy's favorite lunch and a large soda in front of him. Jimmy looked up at Tony making eye contact. Tony's nod was barely noticeable, but it was enough for Palmer to know what it was; a small gesture of thank you for all he had done for him in the past months.

Jimmy smiled as Tony silently left the room heading to the forensics lab to see Abby.

He heard the music booming as the elevator door opened. Entering the forensics lab, he quickly spotted Abby bent over her keyboard typing furiously. Somehow, even over the loud music, she noticed someone coming through the door. Turning, she smiled brightly and grabbed the remote to lower the music.

"Tony!" She announced loudly to no one in particular. He smiled and pulled a Caf-Pow from behind his back presenting it to her. She took it with a smile and began immediately sipping from the straw.

"Usually Gibbs brings me my afternoon treat." She explained to him. He nodded and then shrugged.

"He got a phone call from Ziva and left right after. Apparently she and the baby were discharged from the hospital and needed a ride home." He said furrowing his brow.

Abby frowned. "Where's Josh?"

'Damn' DiNozzo thought. He was certain Abby would know what was going on.

"I don't know. Apparently not there with her." He said. Abby continued to frown but turned back to her keyboard.

"Abs, how well do you know Joshua?" He asked, knowing he could trust Abby to be discreet with his inquiries.

She shrugged. Turning back to him she said sadly, "Not well at all. He's like a fixture in Ziva's life that came out of nowhere. I've only met him a few times."

Tony sighed. "Me too. I mean, granted Ziva has always kept her personal life private but something just isn't sitting right with this."

"Tony, don't. Whatever you're thinking, just don't. Remember what happened the last time you tried to pry into Ziva's personal life." Abby warned.

He nodded. "I know. How much has she told you about their relationship?"

Again she frowned. "Nothing really. Our friendship hasn't been the same since she returned from Somalia. We used to hang out sometimes, go shopping or to a spa for some pampering. Since her rescue, I haven't even been able to get her to out for lunch unless the whole team is involved. It's like she only goes because she thinks she has to, not because she wants to. She didn't even tell me she was pregnant. I found out through the scuttlebutt in the office. When I asked her why she didn't tell me she just apologized and changed the subject." Abby looked sad as she explained.

Tony put a hand on Abby's back in support of his long time friend. "Something isn't right Abby." He said. She nodded but didn't reply.

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"Are these yours?" Gibbs asked with a smirk on his face.

Ziva turned and immediately blushed seeing that Gibbs was holding up her breast pads and moisturizing balm. She hurriedly snatched them from his hand and shoved them into the open bag causing him to grin.

"I think that's everything." He said double checking around the room.

She nodded having recovered from her earlier embarrassment and zipping the bag closed. "Everything except for Jacob. And Joshua." she said quietly.

Gibbs sat in the chair and watched her for a moment. "You're going to be okay Ziver. You said your friend Eden is here to help with the baby. Plus you have your family."

She smiled sadly. "Yes, Eden is here and she will be a god send. As for family, you are the closest thing I have to family here now. I have not done such a wonderful job with everyone else."

"Don't tell Ducky that."

"Well, except for Ducky. I have always found it easy to spend time with him."

Ziva didn't attempt to elaborate on her relationships with Abby, McGee and Tony. Gibbs didn't need her to.

There was a knock on the door and two nurses entered; one pushing the baby in his plastic bassinette and another pushing an empty wheelchair.

"Here he is!" A nurse Ziva knew as 'Karen' announced. Sarah, the other nurse pushed the wheelchair forward. "Your ride awaits you."

Ziva smiled and practically jumped into the wheelchair. Karen lifted the baby and placed him in Ziva's waiting arms. Karen quickly checked his foot and arm bands with Ziva's wrist band. Satisfied that they matched, she raised up and announced. "Time to go."

Ziva smiled down at the baby. "Did you hear that little one? You are all mine now." She said softly. Jacob opened his eyes and stared at his mother eventually sticking his small tongue out of his mouth. Ziva laughed softly.

Karen began her last minute instructions for Ziva. "The medicine we gave you a short while ago will begin to wear off in about six hours. As we explained before, it will in no way affect your breast milk and will just help with any soreness you may feel. If you begin to bleed heavy, running a fever, or have any increased pain come back right away."

Ziva nodded, wishing that Gibbs wasn't standing in the room for this. Karen noticed Ziva's discomfort and turned to Gibbs. "If you want you can bring your car around to the patient loading zone. Sarah will bring you downstairs and help you with the car seat." Gibbs nodded, grabbing the car seat and Ziva's bags.

Once he was gone, she turned back to Ziva. "I know that the current situation is hard. Good luck with everything Ziva."

Ziva voiced her 'thank you's to Karen and everyone else she passed. Once Sarah pushed her through the doors into the fresh air Ziva inhaled sharply causing Sarah to laugh. "Finally free huh?"

Ziva nodded. Gibbs was waiting for them and already had the car seat strapped into the back seat. Ziva was surprised to see that it was Tony's car he was driving. Sarah checked the car seat and congratulated him on getting it right.

"It's been a while but I've had some practice." He told her. Sarah climbed into the other side of the car and help Ziva strap Jacob in. Once he was secure she exited the car and shook Ziva's hand. "Good luck, and congratulations."

Gibbs was surprised to see Ziva pull the nurse into a hug before climbing into the driver's side backseat next to the baby. As Gibbs entered the highway he heard Ziva speak up.

"Thank you so much for this Gibbs. You really didn't have to do any of this."

"We're family Ziva."

She checked the baby momentarily and then turned to stare out the window at the passing scenery.

Finally, she turned her attention back to him. "Back when I returned to Washington, after Somalia. I meant what I said. You really have become the closest thing to a father that I have ever had."

Gibbs scanned traffic closely before he answered her. "Ziver, you know that I would do anything for you. Despite what people may think, I'm not always a heartless bastard."

"I have never thought that about you."

He smiled not believing her for a second. "All of our team have become very special to me."

"Even Tony?" She teased.

Gibbs paused. "Well yeah, I guess even DiNozzo."

Ziva thought for a minute. "And out of everyone, I have given you the most trouble."

"Oh, I knew that was coming from day one. Very few people have the gumption to get right in my face and stare me down like you did that first night we met in the bullpen. I knew you'd be a handful."

He looked in the rearview mirror and saw that she was becoming upset. He quickly added, "But that doesn't mean that I love you any less."

She smiled as tears rolled down her cheeks.

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Later that evening, Tony stood outside of Ziva's apartment door, a basket of Israeli Spring flowers in one hand and a gift for Jacob in the other. Balancing the gift he knocked gently on Ziva's door, taking a deep breath in case Joshua answered.

He was surprised when a stranger answered instead. She was very beautiful, with dark eyes and raven hair darker than Ziva's. She smiled when she saw who it was.

"Well, Tony DiNozzo. I finally get to meet you."

He looked at her strangely. "Uh yeah, is Ziva around."

She looked behind her and pushed herself between Tony and the door, partially closing it behind her. "She is, but she is laying down. She had quite a day."

Tony looked strangely at the woman. "And you are?"

She smiled. "Sorry. It's been quite a day for all of us I guess. I'm a friend of Ziva's. Eden, Eden Rivkin." She stated holding out her hand.

Tony stepped back quickly almost dropping the gifts in his hand. Eden looked at him strangely and then realized her faux pas.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I guess the name got you."

Tony nodded staring at the woman in front of him. "Any relation?"

The smile fell from Eden's face. She brushed her hair back from her face before answering. "Relation? Yes. Michael Rivkin was my twin brother."

To Be Continued


	9. Chapter 9

**Tee Hee, it seems that my crazy brain has everyone in a tizzy. Don't give up on me…. Remember, above all else…. I am a TIVA fan first and foremost. =)**

**I guess Tuesday's episode kinda blew this story out of the water. Okay, so Joshua doesn't begin with an "R". Ah well, I'm going to finish writing this anyway. LOL**

**If I get lots of reviews… I just might post more chapters…...**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 9**

Tony quickly took another step back and fought the urge to reach for his weapon which he was not wearing. Eden, for her part, looked utterly unfazed by her announcement. She waited for several moments. Realizing that Tony was very wary of her she smiled and shook her head.

"Don't be scared of me Agent DiNozzo. Michael was my brother, and for that fact alone I loved him. But, if I had known what he was doing to Ziva I would have put those bullets in his chest myself."

Tony shuffled from foot to foot and continued to stare at Eden. She sighed loudly and ran her hand through her hair. "Tony please, do not fear me. I wish you no ill will. Michael chose his path and paid for his sins in the end. It's in the past. Just because I was Mossad that does not mean I'm a killer."

He eyed her suspiciously. "Truthfully?"

She rolled her eyes. "Okay, maybe a few times. But believe me, if I wanted you harmed, it would've happened a long time ago."

Deep down he knew that was true. Mossad had barely blinked an eye at the death of Michael Rivkin. However, the repercussions of that whole debacle was much more personal to him.

He relaxed slightly. Eden took this as a good sign and pointed to his hands. "I'm assuming those are for Ziva?" He nodded and lifted his hands a bit to show her. "Oh my God, you had Israeli Spring flowers imported for her? They must have cost you a fortune!" She exclaimed.

Tony grinned sheepishly. However, Eden noted that he still kept a wary eye on her.

"I remember when we were little, there was a field of these near her family's beach house in Haifa. We used to go out in our bare feet and run through them. We would run and run until we couldn't run anymore. Then we'd lay on the ground in the middle of the field and just stare up into the sky talking. Those were great times." She said quietly.

The recollection of her childhood memory prompted Tony to speak. "So, you two have been friends for a long time?"

Eden nodded smiling. "We met when we were four. She and I went to the same school. We were best friends from day one. Joshua and his family moved to Tel Aviv from the United States shortly after Ziva and I met. And of course, there was my brother Michael and a few other friends, but the three of us, we were inseparable."

Tony looked troubled. However, he did not voice the reason why. Instead he took the safe route. "You guys have been friends for a really long time." He noted.

Eden nodded. Looking suspiciously at the partially open door behind her, she said quietly; "There isn't anything we wouldn't do for each other."

Tony looked down at the floor and shuffled his feet again. Eden glanced at her watch and then looked at him. "I would invite you in but Ziva needs her rest. It's been an emotional day." She began to explain.

He nodded. "It's okay. I'm sure that she and Josh want some alone time with the baby."

She looked at him strangely and looked as if she was about to say something. Instead, she snapped her mouth closed and reached her arms out. "Here, let me put these in the apartment for you." She looked back at the door again and Tony realized that she was trying to ascertain whether someone was listening in on their conversation.

He held out the basket and the gift to her. She took them and smiled. "Hey, do you know that little coffee shop across the street?" She asked.

He nodded. "Let me put these inside and I'll buy you a cup of coffee. It's the least I can do."

Tony looked at her strangely. "You didn't do anything to me."

She broke eye contact with him momentarily and looked to the floor. "I didn't realize what my brother was doing before it was too late. And because of that, you suffered, Ziva suffered… and you saved her life. You've saved her in so many ways."

Tony felt as if he was having many different conversations with the strange Israeli at the same time. Despite the nagging feeling that he might possibly regret this decision, he nodded. "Okay."

Eden smiled brightly and entered the apartment leaving the door wide open. Tony peered in as Eden walked to the coffee table in the living room placing the flowers and gift in front of the sofa where Ziva was sleeping peacefully.

Even though she was several feet away Tony's breath hitched in his throat. She looked so beautiful. Sleep was one of the few times where Ziva looked completely at peace. She was laying on her side with a blanket thrown haphazardly over her. She wore no make up, her hair pulled into a lazy ponytail, and yet she was the most beautiful creature in the world to him.

Eden grinned to herself when she noticed Tony's state. She finished the note she was scribbling to Ziva and grabbed her purse and keys from the kitchen countertop.

She walked up to Tony and placed a friendly hand on his shoulder. "Let's go." She whispered.

He took one more longing glance in Ziva's direction before he stepped out of the doorway. Eden locked and closed the door behind her. "It's been such a crazy couple of days. Joshua got me an apartment up on the fifth floor so I could be close to Ziva and the baby. When she returns to work, I'll be her full-time Nanny."

Tony looked at her incredulously. "You gave up Mossad to be a babysitter?"

She smiled as the entered the elevator. "I've been finished with Mossad for a long time." She explained. "I just needed a legitimate reason to get out. You don't just 'quit' Mossad, not when Eli is in charge."

"What was the 'legitimate' reason?" He asked.

"I was running an undercover op in Chechnya and took a bullet in the leg. Permanent damage."

Tony held the door open for her to exit the apartment building. He watched as she walked. "You seem to be walking okay."

Eden laughed harshly. She leaned closely to Tony and whispered; "Anything can be permanent when you find the right doctor and have the right amount of money."

Tony stepped back from her and continued to cross the street. 'Who is this woman?' He wondered.

They placed their order and sat down at a table by the front windows. Eden looked at the pastry she had ordered but didn't really have the stomach for. She noted that Tony had his hands wrapped protectively around his coffee cup and was not making eye contact with her.

"What are you thinking Agent DiNozzo?" She asked.

He looked her straight in the eye. "I'm wondering if I can really trust you." He answered truthfully.

She smiled. "I can tell you anything you want to hear. That doesn't make it true. Can you trust me? I will tell you yes, yes you can. Hopefully in time I'll be able to prove that to you."

Tony wanted to believe her, but his mind was whirling. "How do you plan on doing that?" He asked.

She shrugged. "Hopefully, we will become friends. You and Ziva spend a lot of time together, we're bound to cross paths."

"Yeah well, Ziva and I don't really spend a lot of time together outside of work."

"Why?"

It was his turn to shrug. "I wish I knew. We used to. But, that was a long time ago."

"Before my brother?" She asked.

"No, it stopped before that." He answered truthfully.

"When you were undercover with that woman… what was her name. Jeanne? Was that it?" She asked.

Tony's eyes narrowed as he studied her closely. He felt the need to change the subject quickly. "So, how come Ziva never mentioned you before?"

Eden studied her coffee. "Ziva feels the need to keep so many things private. She has voiced the reasons to me, and even though I don't agree with her, I have to respect her."

"You're a loyal friend." He noted.

"Ziva, Josh and myself have been through the ringer together. I would do anything for them." She answered.

Surprising himself, Tony realized that he was starting to feel more comfortable with her. So, he took a dare.

"How do you feel with all of this going on?" He asked.

She smiled and gestured through the window to the apartment building across the street. "Have you seen that baby? He's beautiful."

"He looks just like his mother." Tony said wistfully causing Eden's eyes to narrow.

She sipped her cooling coffee. "How long have you known?" She asked.

"Known what?" He asked sipping his own coffee.

"That you're in love with Ziva."

Tony choked on his coffee. Coughing violently he grabbed a handful of napkins from the dispenser on the table and continued to cough into them. Once he was under control he plastered the infamous DiNozzo smile on his face.

"What makes you think that I'm in love with her?" He asked.

Eden narrowed her eyes at him and smirked. "Tony, I've known you for all of one hour. But I saw the way you were watching her sleep. Why haven't you ever told her?"

He laughed. "There's nothing to tell Eden. Seriously." He lied.

She shook her head. "Liar. Tony seriously, why haven't you told her?"

He looked wistfully across the street and back at his coffee partner. "Even if it was true, do you seriously think I should just knock on her door and say 'Hey, I know you and your boyfriend just had a kid but I love you so dump him and be with me.'?"

She sat back in her chair and studied him. "What has Ziva told you about her and Josh's relationship?"

Tony again stared at his cup. "Well, she was in Miami for a couple of weeks on a case and she came home very happy. She mentioned him to me for the first time then. Nothing specific really."

She chose her next words carefully. "And she told you he was her boyfriend?"

"Well no, as a matter of fact, she denied it a few times, saying he was just a friend. But quite obviously, that was a lie." He said.

"Quite obviously…." She began and then stopped.

Tony's emotions were now getting the better of him. "Well yeah. I mean, come on. They have a kid together!" He said loudly drawing curious looks from other patrons in the shop.

"You know what I think?" She asked finishing her coffee.

"What?" He asked, annoyed at her but not quite sure why.

She shook her head. "For two people who love to talk, you and Ziva have the worst communication skills on the planet."

"What is that supposed to mean?" He asked.

She glanced at her watch. "I have some where to be." She stood but Tony reached out and grabbed her hand.

"Wait-" He began.

"Oh no, enough of this. If you two won't get it together, then dammit I'll give you the kick in the ass you need." She said pulling out of his grip but in turn grabbing his hand. "Come on, you're coming with me."

Tony stood quickly almost tripping as she dragged him from the shop. "Hey, where are we going?"

"To give you your first piece of the puzzle."

To Be Continued


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you so much for the reviews. Remember that I'm writing this story on the fly. There are only a couple of scenes in my mind and I have to build the story around those scenes. I'm not trying to be a review Nazi (as I was called). I need to know if there is something that needs further clarification as I write the chapters and the only way I will know that is through feedback. Trust me, I will not hold chapters or anything like that if I'm not happy with the amount of reviews I get.**

**Tomorrow I will be gone all day, so if my Muse cooperates I'll try to get another chapter up tonight. =)**

**Finally, we start getting some answers. So surprised no one picked up on some of this…. LOL**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 10**

Before embarking on their mysterious journey Tony made sure he grabbed his gun from the glove box of Gibbs' beat up pick up truck. He'd also sent McGee a text that simply said "If you don't hear from me in two hours trace my cell phone". There was no way in hell that he was going to trust this mysterious woman that had just burst into his life.

They'd been driving in virtual silence for almost ten minutes. Tony's earlier inquiries as to where they were going had fallen on deaf ears. The only response he'd received from Eden was when he had quipped; "So, are you taking me to a dark alley to shoot me?"

She had smiled without her eyes leaving the road. "Don't be ridiculous. I'd find a dark wooded road and shoot you there. It would be easier to dispose of your body." She explained.

It certainly didn't put his mind at ease.

Giving up, he started silently out the window. The scenery was recognizable to him and before long he realized that they were on the most direct route to the hospital. Eden angled her rental car into the visitor's parking lot and turned off the engine. Without a word she exited the vehicle and tucked the keys into her purse.

She stopped and turned back towards the car realizing that Tony was still sitting in the passenger seat. "You are coming, correct?" She called to him.

He eyed her wearily as he unhooked his seatbelt and exited the vehicle. Suddenly, a horrible thought entered his mind. "Eden, the baby is home with Ziva right? He's not still here…"

Eden shook her head quickly. "No, no, he's fine. He's home tucked into his bassinette." She began walking briskly towards the entrance, not slowing down at all for the electronic doors to retract. By the time Tony had caught up to her, she was waiting for the receptionist at the visitor's desk to hand over two passes.

She handed one to Tony and picked up her quick pace again, this time towards the elevator. Tony was absolutely stupefied at this point but continued to follow her. He didn't pay attention to the rise of the elevator car, just noticed that it was rising.

Once the car stopped, he almost expected the doors to open to the bright and cheerful maternity ward. He was surprised when the doors opened to a floor that smelled too much like 'hospital'. The walls were muted gray and cream colored. There were no sounds of infants crying, no happy families bustling up and down the hallways.

Tony's initial feeling was of sadness and despair.

Eden exited and walked a bit more slowly, turning only once to make sure Tony was following along. She knocked on a doorframe near the nurse's station and waited.

Hearing a response, she entered and waved Tony in behind her. "Hey you, I brought you a visitor." She told the person behind the slightly pulled curtain.

"Oh God, Ziva didn't bring the baby here, did she?"

Tony immediately recognized the voice. He began to move the curtain aside to allow more room for himself near the hospital bed.

"Of course she didn't bring Jacob here. What do you think she is, stupid? The baby is too little to come here."

Josh stopped suddenly at the sight of Tony. Regaining his composure he looked at Eden; "You're dead." He told her.

She shrugged. "Maybe. But it is what's right and you know it."

Josh nodded. "Tony please, pull up a chair. Let's chat."

Tony didn't pull up a chair. Instead he stood looking between Eden and Josh waiting for an explanation. Neither began to offer anything remotely resembling one so Tony took the initiative.

"What the hell is going on here?" He asked loudly.

Josh gestured to the chairs. "Please Tony sit. I'll talk to you for as long as I can. They just put something in my IV to help me sleep so I don't know how long I'll be awake."

Tony moved a large wooden chair over towards the bed and flopped unceremoniously into it. Josh looked at Eden before turning back to Tony.

"Well, as you can see, I'm not doing too well. Several years ago, I was a lot like you. Single and carefree, loved parties… loved women even more. And to make it even worse, I'm a trust fund baby. Never really had to work a day in my life. When we were kids, and Eden and Ziva joined the Army, I went to the airport with a bag on my shoulder and bought the next plane ticket leaving Tel Aviv. I ended up on Canberra, Australia. I traveled through Australia for a while. But when I got bored, I packed my bags, went to the airport and did the same thing again. I lived like that for many years."

"Is that how you ended up here in D.C.?" Tony asked.

"No. That took a little bit of time. The first time I was here in Washington was when you brought Ziva back from Somalia."

Tony's heart clenched at the mere mention of Somalia. Josh paused for a long moment causing both Tony and Eden to check and see if he'd fallen asleep. His eyes were opened but he appeared to be catching his breath.

"Josh, enough. Get some rest. Tony can come back." Eden began to fuss with Josh's pillows but he reached out and quickly grabbed her hand. "No, I'm okay. This has to be done now."

She quietly sat back in her chair.

He turned his attention back to Tony. "I was 27 when I was first diagnosed with cancer. It was caught fairly early but turned out to be pretty aggressive. I went through radiation and chemotherapy. And after a year long fight, it finally went into remission. When I was finally released from the hospital we threw one hell of a party."

Eden smiled at the memory. "Ziva even came back to Israel on her own accord for that party. It was the first time she'd done that since she came to America." She added.

Tony flinched. "I didn't know. I thought she was going to visit-" He let his voice trail off realizing who it was he was talking to.

"Who Michael? You thought she was coming back to Tel Aviv to see my brother? Oh please. He was just a fling to her at that point." Eden dismissed.

Josh nodded solemnly. "Ziva arrived in Israel on Thursday, left on Sunday. Michael was away doing something for Eli, God only knows what. He didn't even get back in until Saturday night. They saw each other less than twenty four hours before she was back on a plane coming back to you."

Tony shifted uncomfortably. "Well yeah, we're always short handed at NCIS."

Josh sighed loudly. "No Tony! Not NCIS. She was coming back to** YOU**." He emphasized.

Tony sat quietly letting the other man's words sink in. Eden stared quietly at Tony watching for a reaction.

Josh thought that perhaps Tony was uncomfortable talking about Michael in front of Eden. "Hey, do you think you can run down to the cafeteria and get me something sweet before visiting hours are over?"

Eden nodded and grabbed her purse. "What are your dietary restrictions?" She asked.

He shook his head. "No restrictions. I can eat what I can tolerate. And that will change from day to day." He explained.

She placed a comforting hand on Tony's shoulder as she passed and headed out the door.

Josh turned his attention back to Tony. 'Did Ziva tell you she was going to Tel Aviv to visit her boyfriend?" He asked.

Tony shook his head. "No. As a matter of fact, she wouldn't admit to me what she was doing. Just that she was taking a trip."

"And you assumed she was visiting a boyfriend?"

"Well, she had his picture on her desk." Tony defended himself.

"So? I have a picture of Eden and Ziva in my wallet. That doesn't mean that I've had sex with them." Josh said with a smile.

Tony began to speak but then stopped realizing what Josh had said. He smiled at the thought that crossed his mind. "Well, at least not at the same time…" Tony said.

Josh didn't smile but instead raised up in the bed to look Tony more squarely in the eye. "No Tony. I've never had sex with them, either of them."

Tony's mind was whirling. 'This night so didn't turn out the way I thought it was going to.'

"But wait-" he argued. "Jacob…."

Josh shook his head. "We had Jacob through In Vitro." Josh spread his hands out. "As you can see, I'm not doing too well here, Tony. I found out a little over a year ago that my cancer had come out of remission. I immediately started treatment again and it began to respond. It really put life in perspective for me. Yes, I'm young. I could get married and have children, but it just felt like there was a large hour glass above my head and the sand was slowly running out."

"You and Ziva were in Miami together." Tony said quietly.

He nodded. "She was there working on a case, something about a drug cartel or something, I don't know. I was living in New York at the time, heard she would be down there and went down to see her. That was when we began discussing the idea of having a child together through In Vitro. We kicked the idea around for a long time before we went through with it."

Tony was enthralled with Josh's story. "What changed?"

Josh sighed. "I was doing well with the treatments. But it took a toll on my body. I began having issues with my liver, kidneys, pancreas. Fighting the cancer so hard two times did a lot of damage. The doctors basically told me that if the cancer would go into remission, I would eventually need organ transplants to survive. Without them, I would be lucky to have five years to live."

Tony sat quietly staring at the floor. The entire world around him began to swirl and he felt dizzy. He dropped his head down to his chest and took a few deep breaths.

"How did Ziva fit into all of this?" Tony asked him.

Josh looked thoughtful for a moment. "Talk to her about that Tony. Please. Don't push it aside. Don't let her shut you out. Make her talk to you." He practically begged.

He looked at Josh and saw that his eyes were laced with tears.

"I just wanted…." He took a deep breath. "I just wanted a chance to be a father before it was too late. I wanted to be able to get up in the middle of the night and bond with my baby, see their first steps, go to their first ball game or dance recital. And dammit, I would be at every one too. But, now that Jacob is here, I won't get to do any of that."

Tony had a sinking feeling in his heart. He shifted in the chair and continued to look at Josh. "You're dying, aren't you?" He asked.

Josh nodded. "Yeah well, cancer is a funny thing. When it gets you good, it really gets you good. Ziva was barely four months pregnant when it came out of remission again. This time it didn't respond to months of treatment. Instead it spread. I start dialysis in a few days to help my kidneys but I don't know-"

"What don't you know?" Tony asked incredulously. "You have to fight."

Josh shook his head. "It's not a fight Tony. It's prolonging the agony. Any treatment I have now is not going to save my life. It'll just give me a few weeks."

"But you have a newborn son. You have so much to live for…."

Josh swallowed, his eyes drooping somewhat. "I've loved my son from the moment Ziva found out she was pregnant. There was so much planning to do beforehand. I was given a mission to find a doctor that she would be comfortable with, and then cross my fingers and pray that the In Vitro would work. You know it took three tries? That boy is as stubborn as his mother." He said with a wistful smile.

"I don't know what to say to you. 'Sorry' just doesn't seem to cut it." Tony said.

Josh grinned. "Now it's your turn to step up to the plate Tony."

DiNozzo looked at him oddly. "What do you mean?"

"The plate. The big home plate that is life. I just laid my entire life out to you. The bat is in your hand and I'm on the pitchers mound."

Tony smiled slightly at the analogy. "Okay, so what are you throwing to me?"

"A question. And please, give me a honest answer. Do you love Ziva?"

Tony felt panic rising in his brain. He immediately felt that mask that he always used to cover his true emotions begin to slip into place. However, looking at Josh, laying in a hospital bed while cancer ravaged his body, he couldn't bring himself to lie.

"Yes. Yes I do." He said in almost a whisper.

Josh sighed and closed his eyes. "When I'm gone, can you give Ziva the love she deserves and be a father to my son?"

Tony thought for a minute. Loving Ziva just happened for him, it wasn't something he thought about. She was always unattainable. Sure, early on in their partnership he'd imagined having hot, sweaty, sex with her that would bring down the walls. At some point, and he didn't know when, that fantasy changed to making love to her late at night as moonbeams shone through the windows bathing their nude bodies in bluish white light.

Nowhere in either fantasy was there a baby. But the memory from early this morning came crashing into his mind. That of Jacob, snuggled tightly against his chest. The warmth that permeated from the baby, the complete trust Jacob put in him to hold him tight and protect him, the love he felt for a baby that wasn't even his…

It was in that moment that Tony knew full well he would do anything for that boy, no matter he needed or wanted Tony would be there to give it to him. Is that what it took to be a father? He didn't know. He certainly didn't have the best role models in the world

"Honestly Josh, I don't know. Ziva and I have drifted so far apart… and as for the baby. Who said she would even want me in that role when you're gone? Maybe I could be a favorite uncle…."

Josh was beginning to fade to sleep quickly.. "Eden will forge her own path, she's strong and independent, I know I don't know to worry about her when I'm gone. Ziva will be a wonderful mother to Jacob. That I know. But I worry about her. I just want to see her truly happy just one more time before I go." His head lulled to the side and his breathing had evened out.

What Tony suspected was confirmed when Eden slipped quietly back into the room. "You were sitting outside listening?" He asked.

She nodded and placed two Reese's Peanut Butter Cups on the bedside table.

"Do you still think I'm going to kill you Tony?" She asked him.

He watched Josh sleep quietly before turning to her. "I'm still not sure."

She grinned and winked. "Good boy. But what Josh said is true."

"He said that he wanted to see her truly happy one more time. Did he mean when Jacob was born?" Tony asked.

Eden thought for a minute. "Possibly. But I don't think that's what he was talking about."

Tony looked at her. She didn't elaborate. Instead she moved over and grabbed her car keys. "Come on, I'll give you a ride home." He said.

Tony thought for a moment. "No, you know what. I have somewhere else to go. I'll just catch a cab."

"Are you sure? It's really not a problem. I'm the one who dragged you here."

"No really. It's fine. If you see Ziva later, tell her I'll stop and see her tomorrow."

Eden nodded and settled back into the chair and looked sadly at her friend. Tony walked towards the door but then stopped. "Eden?"

She looked at him.

"Thanks. And tell Josh thank you."

She smiled and nodded.

To Be Continued

Just a second author's note- I actually have two friends who went through this. They were friends their entire lives and then he was diagnosed with brain cancer. He was given two years to live at the beginning of his fight when he they started In Vitro. Unfortunately, his fight was lost when their daughter was six weeks old. However, she is now eight, and has a wonderful step father who adores her and vice versa.


	11. Chapter 11

**Ah, my muse was not in a good mood and I struggled with this chapter. However, I think I'm past that hurdle and we should be okay now. I might be able to get another small chapter up later tonight. =)**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 11**

Tony slid into the back of the cab and gave the address to the driver. Pulling out his phone, he sent a quick text to McGee telling him it was a false alarm. He was okay.

Truth be told, he felt less than okay at this moment. A night that had started out as a visit to Ziva and the baby had spun Tony's world completely off it's axis.

'How did everything get so convoluted?' He wondered. 'What a mess.'

Tony thought back to when Ziva first returned from Miami during the Reynosa cartel investigation. It drove Tony crazy to know that Ziva was communicating with another man and he didn't know who it was or what it was about. Ziva had told him on numerous occasions that 'Miami Heat' as Tony had dubbed him was just a friend. He refused to listen. After a while, she gave up denying Tony's teasing and would sit silently stewing while he went on and on.

The teasing was harmless in Tony's mind, but then a sudden thought occurred to him; 'It was harmless when I was teasing her about Michael too and look how that turned out.'

'But we've moved past that, haven't we?' He wondered.

Noticing that they were close to Tony's intended destination, he pulled a few bills out of his wallet to give to the cab driver. He took the steps of the apartment building two at a time and walked hurriedly down the hall.

McGee was surprised to hear a knock at the door. Pausing his computer, he went over the checked the peep hole and saw DiNozzo standing there. He opened the door quickly and threw his arms up in the air.

"What is going on Tony? Why the cryptic text messages?" He demanded.

Tony shook his head and walked into McGee's apartment. Tim expected Tony to begin to make jokes about his computer being on, the books and records on his shelves, anything that got in DiNozzo's eyesight. Instead, he looked a bit rattled and sat quickly in the chair at McGee's writing desk.

McGee pulled his computer chair over and sat, leaning down and resting his elbows on his knees. "Tony?"

"I went over to see Ziva and bumped into an old Mossad friend of hers. We ended out talking and she wanted me to go for a ride with her. I wasn't sure if I could trust her so…"

"A Mossad friend of Ziva's? Here in Washington?" McGee asked.

Tony nodded. "Yeah, and Michael Rivkin's sister. "

McGee sat back in his chair, a surprised look on his face. Tony rarely showed up at his apartment unless there was something major going on. Tim knew that something was going on with DiNozzo from the look on his face.

"So, Michael Rivkin's sister is here in Washington for… what exactly?" McGee asked.

"To be Ziva's nanny." Tony explained.

Tim began to wonder if DiNozzo had been drinking again. Tony looked McGee in the face. "Has Ziva ever mentioned friends of hers from Israel?"

McGee though for a moment. "Not specifically that I can remember. But it's not that far fetched. She's never been one to share a lot of information about herself." He paused for a while waiting for DiNozzo to continue. When he didn't, McGee continued.

"You seem-" He stopping, racking his brain for the right adjective.

DiNozzo snorted. "Confused, worried, angry-" He rattled off to finish McGee's sentence.

McGee shook his head. "To be honest… you seem lost."

DiNozzo looked at him sadly.

"And to be even more honest, you've been like this for a long time." Tim pointed out.

"Is that a fact?" Tony asked.

McGee leaned closer to his friend. "Tony, don't bother trying to hide it. Not from me. I know you too well. You can deny it to my face if you want, but I know better. You've been lost ever since we found out Ziva was pregnant. "

Tony nodded his head slightly and sat forward, resting his arms on his knees. He looked McGee square in the eye. "Did you know that she and Joshua aren't a couple?"

McGee looked at his confused. "You mean aren't a couple anymore?"

Tony shook his head. "No, not a couple. As in… never were a couple. They've been friends since they were kids, the best of friends apparently. He's sick and not expected to live long…. He wanted a chance to be a Father before it was too late."

McGee allowed the news to sink in. "So… Ziva decided to give him that opportunity?" He asked.

Tony shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't talked to her. I came straight here from the hospital where I received the news."

McGee thought for a minute. "You know, before she was pregnant, I heard her tell you time and time again that they were just friends. I thought all your snooping and teasing had pushed them together." He said quietly.

Tony smiled slightly. "You know what? I wasn't sure when Ziva kept telling me that. And then when I found out about the baby… I thought that she had lied to me again."

McGee shook his head. "I never thought so. After the whole Rivkin mess, and Somalia, she changed. I want to think that she changed for the better but at the same time, she seemed to push all of us away a bit. The two of you seemed to be drifting back into that special world you've always been in, but you never were quite there again."

Tony looked at him incredulously. "What are you talking about Probie?"

McGee tried to sum it all up on words. "You and Ziva… there's always been this 'something', I don't know what to call it. It was like this place that the two of you would just go, you'd be perfectly in synch, reading each other's thoughts, practically finishing each other's sentences. And sometimes, I would think the two of you could communicate telepathically. Your eyes would just lock, and if anyone else was in the room it would make them actually feel uncomfortable to be there, like we were intruding on some private conversation that was being shared by only the two of you. I- uh… I used to hope that I could find someone who loved me like that, someone I could share those types of moments with." He confessed.

"I don't know how to fix this McGee." Tony said softly.

"Sure you do Tony. You just have to try." He replied confidently.

Tony was quiet for a bit of time allowing McGee's words to permeate his brain. Glancing at his watch, Tony realized it was getting late.

"It's Friday night Probie. Why are you here talking to me?" Tony asking in a teasing manner.

McGee grinned mysteriously. "You just seemed like you could use the company."

Tony smiled and stood. Reaching out he took hold of Tim's hand shaking it. "Thanks." McGee just nodded silently.

Tony had no sooner closed the door behind him when McGee ran to grab his cell phone. Hitting his speed dial, he waited for the familiar voice to pick up.

"Abby! You're not going to believe what I just found out!"

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Tony had entered his apartment and dropped his spare house key on the kitchen counter. He didn't bother turning any lights on. Feeling mentally exhausted, he'd gone straight to his bedroom, stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed.

Sleep however would not come. His mind was swirling with all that had happened this evening. He loved Ziva, that he knew. This was the fourth time he'd thought she was unattainable to him, ripped out of his arms before she was ever even there.

But now… he wasn't sure of anything. And to make matters worse, there was a newborn baby added into the mix.

Sorting his feelings for Ziva out had always been a royal pain. He was attracted to her from the moment he met her, that he was positive. Their first meeting had lasted only a few days, and had not been during the best of times. Kate's death had hit Tony hard, losing the one woman he felt was truly like a sister to him.

However, there was almost an instant connection between him and Ziva. He could feel it. And it scared the hell out of him. She'd escorted Ari's body back to Israel, and Tony thought he'd never see her again. And then the fateful day had come. He'd moped into work and there she was sitting at Kate's desk. Over a month had passed, but just the sight of her took his breath away.

That had started the roller coaster of their relationship. They had made every mistake, miscue, and miscommunication possible. And, he still loved her.

How did she feel about him? Sometimes, he thought she loved him. He felt her attraction to him, but because of his own fears and insecurities he's pushed it away. Not to mention what Gibbs would do to him.

Could he and Ziva have a relationship? And of course now, there was an added factor.

Jacob.

Could he be a father to another man's child? Was he even ready to be a father?

Tony again thought back to early this morning and how incredible it felt to have Jacob snuggled into his arms. He imagined what it would be like to have that everyday. How amazing would it be to have Jacob's dark brown eyes look at him in adoration because he was his Daddy, and for no other reason. What would it feel like to hear Jacob call him Daddy for the first time? There would so much to teach him.

Tony imagined teaching Jacob to take his first steps while Ziva caught it all with the camcorder. And of course, he would be holding onto the seat when Jacob starting riding his bike without his training wheels for the first time. There would be all the firsts, and unlike his father, Tony would be there for all of them.

His happy fantasy was interrupted by one thought… 'Only if Ziva wants you to be.'

He sighed. Reaching over to his nightstand, he picked up his cell phone. Typing in a quick message, he hit the send button and laid the phone back down. Snuggling deeper into his pillows, he wondered what his next conversation with Ziva would bring.

To Be Continued


	12. Chapter 12

**I've never really realized how truly evil my muse is. LOL I know some people are upset with Ziva, but give our heroine a chance. She just might surprise ya… or maybe not. Tee Hee**

**As promised, my second chapter of the day. Now the bad news... I go back to work tomorrow after being off for a month of disability. Sooooo, the chapter updates may not come as rapidly as they have been. I apologize ahead of time if days go by without a chapter. My job is mentally exhausting on some days and I'm not sure how I'm going to feel physically.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. We're still out here Shane!**

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****"Just One More….." Part 12**

Ziva slowly awoke to the sound of her cell phone vibrating on the coffee table. Momentarily disoriented, she looked around to discover that she had fallen asleep on her sofa. She grabbed for her phone and glanced at the time lit up on the face of her phone.

2:13am.

She remembered that Eden had taken a break from the hospital to bring dinner home for Ziva. They had sat down to eat, but that was a little after five. Ziva had nursed the baby, burped and bathed him before he had fallen asleep again. That was around 6:30pm.

'Have I been asleep for that long?' She wondered.

Ignoring the text messages waiting for her, she went in to check on Jacob. He was laying in his crib, however his eyes were wide open.

"Hey little one, how long have you been awake? You should have woken Mommy up." She told him. As soon as Ziva came into Jacob's eyesight he began waving his arms in the air. Ziva smiled.

"I know little one. I missed you too while I was sleeping." She scooped him up and moved over to changing table. "Oh Jacob, you are soaked. You definitely should have let Mommy know."

Once the baby was dry, she began walking towards the living room. Jacob was already beginning to move around her breast. "I know, I know." She quickly settled onto the couch and lifted the T-shirt she was still wearing. Before she even had him properly positioned, he had latched on and was drinking greedily.

"You might think you were starving Jake." She laughed. She looked around for the hair scrunchie had in her hair holding her ponytail when she had first fallen asleep. It was on the floor, half under the coffee table. 'Oh well.' She thought.

As the baby continued to eat, she noticed the flowers and gift bag on the table in front of her. "I wonder who these are from, hmm?" She asked the baby. Jacob was only interested in one thing right now, and it certainly wasn't the gifts in front of him.

She couldn't reach the gifts without disturbing the baby, so she used her right foot the slide the gifts closer so she could grab them with her hand.

"Oh Jacob, look at these flowers. These are from Mommy's homeland. It is very far away from us, but maybe some day we will be able to visit." There was no note with the flowers so she looked in the gift bag. Sure enough, there was a card nestled at the top of the tissue paper in the bag.

Balancing the baby, the pulled the card from it's envelope. She immediately recognized the handwriting on the inside as Tony's.

_Ziva-_

_Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful son. He's very lucky to have such wonderful parents. May life bring you everything your heart desires. You deserves all the happiness life can give you. I hope, that I will play a small part in it through our friendship. __Again congratulations, and best wishes._

_Love,_

_Tony_

Ziva teared up reading Tony's words. It was very rare that he let his feelings show, so for his him to not only think of having flowers from Israel imported in, but to write something so sweet on paper for her… it overwhelmed her.

She placed the card gently on the sofa next to her. Jacob has slowed his eating, taking a few drinks and stopping. Ziva had to smile again at her little miracle.

She wiped her eyes with her free hand and began rummaging through the bag. She had to laugh when she pulled out a blue sleeper that said "Mama's Boy" on the front. There was a second green one that had an embroidered picture of a broken vase of flowers with a basketball laying next to it. Written on the front of this one was "Uncle Tony Made Me Do It!"

She laughed loudly at this one causing the baby to startle. "Oh, I'm sorry little one, that was Mommy's fault." She attempted to sooth Jacob but he would have none of it. He immediately began to wail, his hands were balled into fists and his entire face turning red.

She moved him to her shoulder, not bothering to cover herself up. They were alone in the apartment anyway. She rubbed and patted his back, rocking him gently. He had quieted down suddenly, and that was when Ziva felt it; wetness running down her arm. Moving the baby back she noticed that he had spit up all down her shoulder.

"Oh boy, Mommy deserved that one, huh?" She used her shirt to wipe the baby's mouth. At least he wasn't crying anymore. "Here Jake, look at what Tony bought us." She pulled the sleepers up and showed them to the baby. "You see this one? You better not ever let Tony talk you into breaking one of Mommy's vases." She warned him. Jacob stared at her intently as if he was soaking in every word she said. "And you see this, it says 'Uncle Tony Made Me Do It'. Do you know what that means?"

Jacob of course didn't answer. He continued to watch her intently. "That means that he wants to be part of your life. That makes your Mommy very happy."

Ziva pulled her legs up on to the sofa and crossed them, allowing the baby to settle into the crook of her knee. She kept her hands on the baby as she continued to talk to him.

"You see Jacob, your Mommy and Tony have an…interesting relationship. I will tell you about it someday. Maybe when you are thirty."

Jacob waved his arms in the air again, kicking his feet for good measure. She smiled down at her son. "So, this is what being a single parent is about huh? Grabbing sleep while I can, having conversations with you that you cannot possibly understand." She looked down at how the baby was staring at her. "Or… maybe you can?" She asked him.

She heard her cell phone buzz again, reminding her that she had unread text messages. She reached for the phone. That was when she realized that she still had baby spit up on her shoulder. Her hair fell down right into it.

"Oh… eww. Okay. Priorities first here." She let go of the baby momentarily and slipped the shirt over her head. Using a clean corner, she wiped her hair the best she could. Watching Jacob as she wiped, she could have sworn there was a smirk on his face.

She was grateful that it was warm in the apartment now that she was clad only in her nursing bra and sweatpants. She re-hooked her nursing bra and again reached for her phone to check her text messages. She had texts from Eden and Tony. She went immediately to Tony's first.

_I stopped by earlier but your were resting. I hope you're feeling okay and hope you had a good first day home. I'll talk to you soon_.

Ziva smiled brightly. "Oh yes Jacob, Mommy and Tony have a very special relationship."

She closed the message but did not delete it. Instead, she opened Eden's text.

_You're going to kill me…. A long, slow, hard death._

Ziva's brows furrowed. She typed back a quick response.

_Why would I kill you?_

She barely had her phone closed when the response came.

_I spilled the beans._

Ziva was confused.

_Jacob and I are up, why don't you come down. Use your key._

_Ok._

It only took a few minutes before Ziva heard the key in her lock. Eden walked in and locked the door behind her. She glanced at Ziva sitting on the sofa half dressed with a wide awake baby and smiled.

"Rough night?" She asked with a smirk.

"Not really. It just seemed to fall apart in the last few minutes. How is Josh?" She asked with concern.

"He's holding his own. I think he feels worse than what he is saying. I also think he's in a lot of pain but he's more worried about you and the baby."

Ziva frowned. She started to speak but Eden interrupted her; "Before you say it, don't even think about it. If you step one foot in that hospital room he'll climb out of that hospital bed and strangle you."

Ziva sighed. "I know. I just hate the thought that he is so sick and he is so close, but I cannot go be with him."

Eden flopped onto the couch next to her and smiled down at the baby who seemed to be fading off to sleep. "You're doing something far more important to him. He knows you would be there if you could. But Jacob is top priority right now."

Ziva nodded. "I know. I shall call him tomorrow. So why am I going to kill you?"

Eden was half temped to take the baby from Ziva to shield herself from the 'Wraith of Ziva" that she was sure was about to be unleashed.

"Well, uh… Tony stopped by earlier." Ziva nodded.

"Yeah, well, we kind of went and had coffee."

"Tony went with you? Did he know who you are?" Ziva asked.

"Yeah, I told him. He was a little surprised, and kept a close eye on me the entire time we were together."

"Then why would I…. Oh God, did you sleep with him?" Ziva whispered loudly noting that the baby was asleep.

"What? No!"

"Well then-"

"I spilled the beans."

Ziva sighed. "Why would I care if you spilled beans?"

"No Ziva, it's an expression. You know, spilled the beans? Let out one great big giant huge secret?"

Ziva understood immediately. "You told him about Josh?"

Her calmness frightened Eden. "Yeah, I was heading to the hospital to see Josh. Tony went with me."

"I see." Ziva carefully pulled Jacob into her arms and carried him back into his room. She kissed his forehead gently before placing him in his crib.

She walked into her bedroom and grabbed a shirt to put on. Walking back into the living room she smiled at Eden who was wincing.

"Eden it's okay. It was never a secret."

"Never a secret? Well then why didn't Tony know?"

Ziva sighed, trying to sum it up easily.

"I spoke privately to Gibbs before we started the In Vitro procedures. He is my boss and should know. Ducky helped me throughout the In Vitro and the pregnancy. He was my answer man when I had questions about myself, or Josh. It is more difficult with the others."

"Why?"

"Because of Tony. They were friends with Tony long before I came to NCIS. They are loyal first and foremost to him. Tony and I…"

"Tony and you what?"

"We have danced around each other for so long that we were at a point where we knew nothing else. I told Tony on numerous occasions that Josh was just a friend. He did not believe me. Even after all that happened with Michael, when I was not able to be honest with him, and the consequences I paid for it… he still did not believe me. It hurt. I could not tell McGee or Abby about my feelings for Tony or how much his distrust hurt. So I just put up a wall on that part of my life. That wall did more than I intended it to. I basically blocked myself into a corner with the three of them on the outside looking in."

"Ziva, I **KNOW** that Tony loves you."

Ziva looked down at her lap and shrugged. "I thought at one point, that was true. Do you remember when Director Vance sent me back to Israel, right after Jenny was killed?"

Eden nodded and smiled. "I've never seen you like that. You were like a lovesick schoolgirl. You were smiling all the time, and I even heard you giggle on occasion."

Ziva smiled. "Tony and I had a lot of deep, meaningful conversations. We had never had that before. Tony keeps his feeling hidden so much. But he let **me** in. When Jenny died, he felt this incredible sense of guilt. He let** me** comfort him. I really thought that night in autopsy was a major turning point for us. The next thing I knew I was on a plane back to Israel. I was just waiting for him to call or write. I started fantasizing about telling my Father that I'd fallen in love with an American and I was resigning from Mossad and returning to America to be with him."

Eden sighed. "And he never called."

Ziva nodded. "He never called. I tried contact him a couple of times, but he did not reply. He was afloat so I was not even sure he was getting my messages. But then McGee told me that Abby was getting post cards from him regularly-" Her voice trailed off.

Eden didn't need her to finish her sentence. But she did anyway; "I had to assume that he did not want to contact me."

"So you fell into bed with my brother." Eden said.

Ziva looked away from her. "Not one of my brightest moves, obviously."

"Honey, don't blame yourself. No one was responsible for Michael's choices except Michael. He chose to conspire with your father hoping to win his approval. Michael's ambition always outweighed his common sense. He wanted to be promoted to team leader of Malachai's unit."

"Michael was not entirely to blame. I could have made better choices as well."

Eden glanced at the clock. "Well, you better get some sleep. And just remember Ziva, it's too late for Michael. But it's not too late for you."

Ziva smiled and nodded.

Eden returned her smile and stood. Heading towards the door, she turned to Ziva. "Oh, and by the way, you need to change your shirt again."

"What?" Ziva said, glancing down at herself.

The wet stain on the front of her shirt served as an instant reminder that she'd forgotten to replace her breast pad. "Dammit!" She swore.

Making sure the door was locked behind Eden, Ziva went back to her dresser again. 'Are these supposed to keep leaking like this?' she wondered.

To be continued


	13. Chapter 13

**Just as I suspected, returning to work completely cut into my writing time. Sorry for the delays between chapters. I'll try to do better.**

**Warning- this chapter may be uncomfortable for some people to read. We're getting into the T rating here folks. Please be forewarned.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More….." Part 13**

Tony awoke the next morning and stretched his long limbs.

'Ah, Saturday.' He thought to himself.

Sitting up in bed he noted the red light blinking on the top of his cell phone indicating that he had a text message waiting for him.

_Thank you for the gifts, they were beautiful and very thoughtful. Give me a call later, perhaps we can have lunch?_

He smiled brightly. Glancing at the time the message came in however he had to frown.

4:19am

He blinked the sleepiness from his eyes one more time before he sent a message back.

_I would love to have lunch with you. But why on earth were you texting me in the middle of the night? He hit the send button._

He placed the phone down and went into the bathroom, noticing that the clock now read 8:30am. 'She's probably asleep'. He thought.

After brushing his teeth and splashing cold water on his face, he returned to see the message light blinking again.

_Because I have a newborn baby. How about coming over for breakfast instead?_

He smiled again. Ziva seemed to be making him do that a lot.

_I'll be over as soon as I can shower._

_Ok_

With an extra spring in his step, Tony hurriedly grabbed some clothes and headed back towards the bathroom.

* * *

Ziva smiled and flipped her phone shut. She picked up the baby monitor and went to Jacob's door. She quietly approached his crib and triple checked, making sure he was sleeping soundly. Sighing with relief, she went across the hall to her room and grabbed some clean clothes.

Good idea Tony. She thought to herself.

She undressed in her bedroom careful not to look at her nude form in the full length mirror that hung on the wall. She slipped on her robe and went into the bathroom and started the water running.

The warm water spraying over her tired muscles felt sinfully good. Knowing that it wouldn't take Tony long to arrive at her apartment, she hurriedly finished up and had just left the bathroom when there was a knock at her door.

She smiled. 'I think he just set a new record.'

She left her towel slung over her shoulders to catch the water still dripping from her hair as she went to let Tony in.

"Hey." He said in greeting, trying not to let his eyes roam up and down her frame. He'd definitely noticed that she had more curves since she was pregnant. There she stood in front of him barefoot, clad only in baggy sweatpants and a loose fitting tee. Her hair was wildly curly and wet from her obviously just getting out of the shower.

She was stunning.

She smiled but didn't answer. Instead she stepped back and gestured him into the apartment. He immediately noticed how quiet the apartment was. "Where's Jake?" He asked.

"Sleeping for now. He has been up every two hours since 0200."

Tony nodded. "That's why you were texting me in the middle of the night."

She nodded. "I did not get a chance to start breakfast. I took the opportunity to grab a shower. What do you feel like? I have a little bit of everything. I think Eden went crazy grocery shopping…" She muttered.

Tony shook his head. "No no, sit. Relax. I'll cook."

Ziva looked at him incredulously. "You will cook breakfast?"

He nodded. "I have many talents Zee-vah. You've only begun to scratch the surface."

She smiled and threw her hands in the air in mock surrender. Grabbing the baby monitor, she settled on to the couch and pulled her feet under her.

Tony was opening and closing cabinets in the kitchen. "The bottom cabinet next to the stove." She called out. Tony snapped his fingers and opened the door, pulling out a pan. He opened the fridge and had to whistle.

"Wow. I should send Eden grocery shopping for me. There's so much stuff how can you find anything?"

Ziva shrugged. "I cannot find anything in there. I will be sharing a lot of meals in the next few days."

Tony's head popped out of the refrigerator holding a carton of eggs. "With me?" He asked in a joking manner.

Ziva shrugged nonchalantly. "Perhaps. If you behave yourself."

He smiled and went back into the trenches, moving packages, bags and boxes.

"Ah ha! Success!" He announced pulling out several items he could work with.

Ziva looked at him strangely. "I can make a great omelet. And… Ziva? Bacon and sausage? Not exactly Kosher."

"I have never eaten Kosher Tony. You know that."

"Yeah but I thought… I don't know what I thought."

"No, tell me please. "

Tony didn't respond right away. Instead he busied himself with getting the sausage sizzling in the pan.

Ziva stood from the couch, dropped the towel on the floor and walked to the kitchen counter, standing on the opposite side from Tony.

"Tony, what did you think?"

He shrugged. "I guess I thought that maybe you'd be getting back to your roots a bit more now that the baby is here."

Ziva nodded. "I understand. However Joshua is not Jewish and we decided to allow Jacob to choose his own path." And then she smiled. "And I can already tell you, eating Kosher is not one of his choices. I craved sausage and bacon the entire time I was pregnant. And cheese, there had to be cheese on everything."

Tony smiled. "My kind of kid." He said.

She nodded. "Oh yes, I suspect the two of you are going to get along quite well."

"I'm glad that I'm going to get the chance. For a while I wasn't so sure-"

Ziva's smile faded. "Tony, I would never cut you out of Jacob's, or my life. Why would you think that?"

He sighed. "Look, you're tired. I just wanted to have a nice breakfast with you and the little guy. Can we save the heavy talk for later?"

She looked him closely in the eye for a moment before she nodded slightly. "Okay. Perhaps for dinner tonight? It will allow me time to get some rest and…think about some things."

"Some things?" He asked as he flipped the sausage patties over.

She nodded but did not elaborate. "So you met Eden yesterday…." She started.

He nodded. "Yeah. That was a bit of a shocker."

"I am sorry. I wanted the two of you to meet but I wanted the chance to warn you ahead of time. I did not want it dropped in your lap the way that it was."

"So she's really Michael's sister?"

Ziva nodded. "Yes, but they never got along. At all. She was so angry with me for getting involved with Michael at all that it put a real strain on our friendship."

Tony thought for a few moments. "Did she know what Michael was up to?"

She shook her head. "No, she was far away from Israel on assignment by the time things got so… out of control. "

"So the two of you really haven't spent a lot of time together in the last few years?"

She shook her head. "No. She was in Tel Aviv when I had first arrived following Jenny's funeral. We spent a lot of time together then. My father sent a team of us on assignment to Morocco, she was part of that unit."

"So was Michael. I saw the footage on ZNN."

She nodded. "Yes. My father had told me that he was hoping they could repair their relationship by forcing them to work as a team. It did not turn out so well."

Tony frowned. "Your father really cared that much about them?"

Ziva shook her head. "Of course not. He needed Eden and I to go undercover in a club where our suspects were known to visit. She could wait tables, I could sing. Michael was to keep an eye on us."

"That sounds like an interesting assignment."

Ziva smiled. "It was actually a lot of fun. Eden and I drove Michael crazy as much as we possibly could. I got to dress in sexy clothes and perform in front of an audience which is something I have not done since I was a child."

Tony checked the sausage and moved them to a plate covered with paper towels to drain. He began placing bacon in the hot pan. "Wasn't that awkward?"

Ziva knew immediately what Tony meant. "No. Michael and I were not involved in that way until after the explosion. He was posing as my boyfriend during the mission, however our relationship had not taken that turn. It was not until after the explosion and I spoke to Gibbs on the telephone….." Her voice trailed off.

Tony noticed immediately and turned to her. "So much for saving heavy discussions for later." He smiled.

"We did say that. However, there is a lot to be said between us. Yes?"

Tony used the spatula in his hand to turn the bacon but didn't speak. Finally, he turned to her and leaned across the counter on his elbows. "There is. A lot for both of us. I guess talking to Josh last night made me feel…."

"What?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. It made me feel a lot of things."

"Tell me."

Tony started to turn away from her but she reached out and put her hand on his arm. "Please Tony. Do not turn away."

He refused to meet her gaze and instead returned to the stove. Ziva moved around the counter and pulled out a mixing bowl and set it on the counter. However, she didn't return to her previous position. He continued standing a few feet away from him.

"Do you remember when you asked me if I believed in soul mates?" He asked suddenly.

She nodded. "Yes. "

"I never really gave you an answer. I do believe in soul mates. I've always believed that somewhere in the world is that one person you are meant to be with. It's like we're all fractured souls and only that one person, your soul mate can make you completely whole."

Ziva's brows raised a bit and she smiled. "That is rather romantic Tony." She said.

He shrugged. "Maybe. But seeing Josh laying in that bed wanting so much out of life really made me think. He wants just one more day, one more week, year…one more chance to live life and he's not going to get it. And he's got everything to live for. It made me wonder if maybe I've wasted part of my life searching for that one person."

She looked down at the floor momentarily. She felt her heart drop to her feet before it broke but she had to ask.

"Do you think you will ever find her? Your soul mate…." She asked quietly.

Tony was now breaking eggs into the bowl and mixing in the veggies and cheese he had dug out of the fridge.

"You know better than to ask me that Ziva."

She looked confused. "Why?"

He put the whisk in the sink and dumped the egg mixture into the pan. He moved over into her personal space and looked her in the eye.

"What do you think I was trying to tell you in Somalia? When I said that I 'couldn't live without you'? You're my other half Ziva but I just don't know how to breech this huge chasm that's always between us."

Ziva felt tears sting her eyes. She blinked rapidly to stop them from falling. "Why could you not ever tell me that?" She whispered.

He sighed. "There just seems to always be something keeping us apart. That damn undercover assignment the Director put me on, Vance sending you back to Israel, Michael, Somalia… and of course, infamous Rule 12."

Ziva's mind was whirling. "Rule 12 is the least of our worries Tony. What do you think right now Tony?"

He carefully turned the large omelet over in the pan before he answered. "I'd like us to spend time together, to work through all of these obstacles fate has placed in between us. I want to see if we can really do this."

Ziva crossed her arms in front of her. "I would like that Tony. A lot. But I have to know."

"What?"

"Are you ready to have Jacob be part of all this? He is the biggest part of my life now. I cannot allow myself to become involved with someone who does not want to be a part of his life."

"I don't know Ziva. I have absolutely no experience with babies." He reached out and touched her cheek gently. "But he's part of you. And that makes him very special to me."

She smiled and looked towards the pan. Tony turned and checked the omelet. Turning off the burner underneath he used the spatula to cut the omelet in half and fold it expertly. She moved over and grabbed two plates from the cabinet and split the sausage and bacon between them. Tony shoveled the omelet on to each plate. Grabbing silverware they moved to the table and sat quietly.

She took a bit of her eggs and smiled. "Not bad at all Tony. I am impressed."

He smiled. They ate silently for several minutes before she put her fork down.

"How much did Joshua and Eden tell you last night?"

Tony stopped eating. "Eden didn't tell me much at all. Josh told me about his battles with cancer, about the in vitro, how upset he is that he won't get to be a father to Jacob."

She nodded. "When we first started discussing this, he was doing so well. He'd fought the cancer twice and beaten it. He was strong and healthy. It took me a long time before I could go through with the procedures."

"Just trying to decide whether you were ready to be a mother?" He asked.

She nodded and took another bite. She chewed thoughtfully. After she swallowed, she answered. "Partly, there was more to it than that though."

"Tell me." He prompted, repeating her command from earlier.

She sighed. "I have always known deep down that I wanted to be a mother. I love children. I always have. I loved having a baby sister. Tali always used to tell me that I mothered her too much. But deep down I knew she loved it." She took a deep breath. "It became a question of **'if'** I could be a mother after Somalia."

Tony's eyes did not meet Ziva's. Instead he placed his fork down gently. "What do you mean by '**if'**?" He then held his breath.

Ziva put her fork down as well and reached over and took Tony's free hand. "I had some…injuries…. I was left with some scarring. My doctors said that I have a slim chance of ever being able to conceive naturally. In vitro was one of the options I was left with."

Tony let go of the breath he was holding. "You were raped." It wasn't a question.

She stood and led him over to the couch. They settled in close together. Ziva was sitting with her back against the arm, her feet up in front of her. "I was." She said quietly.

"Saleem?" Tony didn't think he could get more than one word out.

"No. He never - It was his men." She took a deep breath as tears began to stream steadily down her face. "The first few days I was captive he allowed his men free access to do whatever they wanted, as long as I was not killed. They came in groups of four, five sometimes six at a time…two or three would hold me down and…" She stopped and Tony put a hand on her knee in comfort. "When they were done they would just trade places… I wanted to die Tony."

He wanted to say something to her… to comfort her in some way. However, nothing seemed adequate. So instead, he continued to rub her knee and allowed her to gather herself together.

She breathed deeply a few times to collect herself. "After being there for several weeks, I started feeling ill. At first I thought it was the affects of being raped, starved, beaten, and drugged for so long. But then I started to think… 'Oh God, what if…" She was weeping openly now. "What if I was pregnant with one of these animal's child? S-Saleem started to notice the vomiting and that my period had stopped. He brought me in for an interrogation one morning. When I would not give him any information he began hitting me in the stomach and ribs over and over and over. When I fell to the ground he kicked me repeatedly in the stomach and left me laying there for hours. "

The food that Tony had just eaten turned sour in his stomach. He continued to rub her knee and begged his stomach to behave long enough for Ziva to finish her story.

"I started…. Started to cramp and bleed. I knew I was losing the baby. He sent some of his men in there hours later to clean me up and give me a change of clothes. I couldn't even stand on my feet but they dragged me back to my cell and left me there. Saleem never spoke of it."

Tony swallowed hard. "They never brought in a doctor?"

She shook her head as she wiped her face. "No, it was too risky. Saleem ordered his men not to touch me any longer. But he always used it as a threat against me…. always warned that he was going to allow his men to-" She stopped when Tony suddenly jumped from the sofa and ran into the bathroom emptying the contents of his stomach.

He rinsed his mouth in the sink and returned to the living room. Ziva had her arms wrapped around her legs tightly and she was rocking back and forth gently. "That's where the scarring came from." He finished for her.

She nodded. "For me to ever be a mother, I would either have to adopt or try in vitro. Adoption would be very hard. I'm a single woman. I've only been a US citizen for a short time. It would be near impossible. In vitro is very expensive. On my probationary agent's salary I never would be able to afford it on my own. Josh wanted to be a father so badly. He wanted me and him to both be able to give a child the life like neither of us had. It seemed reasonable."

"Josh mentioned that he came to Washington after you returned from Somalia."

"Yes. When we got back to Washington and Ducky took me to the hospital, I contacted Josh and Eden to let them know I was alive. Josh happened to be in New York. He was here on the next train. He stayed at the hospital with me. He soothed me during my nightmares. I would cry, kick and scream and he'd hold on to me. When I was released from the hospital, I had nothing. No money, no home. Everything I had was destroyed in the explosion at my apartment. Josh helped me get on my feet. He got me this apartment. He never asked for anything in return."

"I… I'm so sorry." He said quietly.

She leaned forward and took his hand. "No, you have nothing to be sorry for. I was in Somalia by my own choice. You did not send me there or force me to go."

Tony shook his head. "No no, when Gibbs told us that you weren't coming on the plane. I should have got off and dragged you on board."

Despite the conversation, Ziva smirked. "Do you think that would have worked?"

He grinned slightly. "What if I had grabbed you and told you that I thought I was madly in love with you?"

She cocked an eyebrow at him. "At that point in time, I would not have believed you. Everywhere I looked I was seeing betrayal. But if you told me that now…"

"If I told you that now what?" He said noticing how her mood had turned light hearted.

"Now…. I think the outcome would be very different." She teased.

Tony shifted on the couch so that he was facing her. He took both her hands in his. He took a deep breath.

"Ziva…-"

The quiet moment was shattered by the sudden wail coming from the baby's room. Tony released the breath he was holding and Ziva's head fell back almost hitting the arm of the sofa. Tony' released her hands and allowed her to head towards the babies room.

She returned a few moments later with a teary eyed baby in her arms. "Jacob, look who is here to see you." She tilted her arms slightly so that Jacob could see Tony.

"Hey there big guy." He said.

Ziva sat back on the sofa with the baby. "I think he was lonely in there all by himself." She said in a soft voice.

Tony smiled and studied the baby closely. "Can I hold him?" He asked her.

She smiled. "Absolutely." She handed Jacob to Tony and smiled at how quickly the baby settled into his arms.

"He feels so tiny." He marveled to her.

"We should enjoy it while we can. It will not last forever." she said.

Tony used his pointer finger to gently trace the baby's face and down his nose and chin. The baby immediately turned his face towards his finger. Ziva laughed.

"He's hungry." She said.

"How can you tell?" He asked.

"Because he just tried to latch onto your finger."

"Oh."

Ziva could have sworn she saw Tony blush slightly.

Tony moved his finger to Jacob's hand and was amazed when the baby took his finger in his grip. His touch was so gentle yet felt so strong.

Ziva sat and studied the scene in front of her. She wished she had a camera to capture the moment. There was a small smile on Tony's face as he stared down at her son.

"Amazing." He whispered and then turned to look at her as if he suddenly remembered she was there.

The baby started to fuss which was Ziva's cue. "Oh yes, he is definitely hungry." She took Jacob from Tony and placed a blanket over her shoulder. Using one hand she was able to get her shirt up, nursing bra unhooked at the baby sucking greedily without once allowing the blanket to slip.

Tony watched disappointed. He wanted to share in everything he could with Jacob and breast feeding was obviously not one of them. He watched the peaceful look on Ziva's face as she lifted the blanket and whispered softly to the baby. Laying the blanket back on her shoulder she settled back deeper into the sofa cushions and yawned.

"Let me clean up my mess in the kitchen so you can finish up and get some sleep."

"No Tony it's fine. Really. I can clean it up. It is the least I can do. I invited you over for breakfast and you ended out cooking.

He shrugged. "It's okay really. I'm just glad I came over."

She smiled. "Me too. I am glad we talked. It could be the start of something good, yes?"

His face lit up into a smile. "Definitely."

He stood and leaned over, kissing her gently on the head and touching the only part of the baby visible under the blanket, his legs.

"I'll see you guys later."

"Yes, dinner. 1800 hours?" She asked.

"I'll be here."

With that, Tony left the apartment his mind whirling more than before.

To be continued


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks so much again for the reviews and story alerts. It really feeds my muse to know people care enough about my ramblings. LOL**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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"Just One More….." Part 14

After taking a small bat nap… no, that wasn't right… cat nap, that was it…cat nap Ziva felt a bit more refreshed than she had earlier in the day.

The heavy discussion she'd had with Tony this morning had added to her exhaustion, but at the same time, left her with a feeling of… hope, elation… maybe a little of both? She wasn't sure.

After checking on the baby, she grabbed her phone and dialed the number Eden had left for her. She smiled when she heard the answer on the other end.

"Hello?"

"Shalom." She answered.

"Hey, it's my favorite baby mama." Josh said lightheartedly.

"Ha, I better be your only baby mama." She said teasing back.

"Well, you know…every man has his secrets. How are you feeling?"

Ziva's eyebrows raised. "How am I feeling? I am fine."

"And Jake?"

"Jake is perfect. Very hungry all the time but we are managing. How about you?"

"Oh, you know. You just interrupted my wind sprints up and down the hallway here. And I'll be challenging Nurse Aurrichio to a kick boxing match later today."

"Josh." Ziva scolded. "Please be honest."

"I'm okay for now Ziva. I won't lie to you and tell you that I feel fine. There are times when I barely feel like I can hold my own head up."

She fought back tears. "I wish I could be there with you."

"No," He immediately replied. "Don't even think about it. You focus on Jacob, and making sure your son has the most wonderful life he can."

"You mean our son." She corrected.

Joshua was silent for a few moments before he replied. "Ziva, he was only going to be son by name. Biologically there isn't one strand of DNA in Jacob that's mine."

"I know, I- I never imagined I would be doing this alone. " She replied. "Besides, biology does not make a family."

"No you're right. It doesn't. Love and life experiences do. But at the same time, Jacob won't have any memories of me. I'll be gone long before-. Ziva honey, don't cry please. I can't stand to hear you cry."

She was openly weeping now. "I'm sorry. I do not want to do this without you."

Josh composed himself for a moment before answering. "I'll always be with you in one way or another Ziva. But you're so strong. I don't have a single doubt in the world how great of a Mother you will be."

"It seems so unfair." She whispered.

"It does. But sometimes I can't help but wonder if maybe…just maybe this is how it was meant to be."

"Meant to be?" She asked incredulously.

"Yeah, just hear me out. You and I have been such wonderful friends for so long. But, our relationship has never been more than that. Neither of us were ever interested in more than that from each other. At the same time, you've met and fallen in love with someone. And you just can't figure out how to be with him. But now, it seems like having Jacob and my..situation, may make that a bit easier for you. I'll consider that my final gift to you."

"Gift? You've given me so much already. I do not think I would have ever recovered from Somalia if you were not here. "

Josh thought for a moment. "Have you truly recovered?"

She smiled slightly. "I- I believe I have. For the first time… I really believe that. Tony came over this morning for breakfast. We had a good talk. I even.. I was even able to tell him some of what happened in Somalia; about the gang rapes, and Saleem forcing me to miscarry…"

"And how did he react?" Josh asking truly intrigued.

"Well, first he ran from the room and threw up. But he came back right away, so strong and caring… and Josh?"

"Yeah?"

"In his own way, I think that he told me he loved me." She smiled.

On the other end of the phone, Josh smiled too and looked over to Eden, giving her a thumbs up. "In his own way? Either he did or he didn't. Which is it?"

Ziva thought for a moment. "I am going to say that he did. Nothing is ever black and white when it comes to Tony and I. And those feelings I felt for him so long ago… it is there again. I have not truly felt that since before Somalia."

"I'm impressed. All this in one morning, huh?"

She smiled. "Yes. When Tony and I put our minds to it, we can accomplish great things."

"I'm glad Ziva, really I am. Yesterday was one of the first times I'd ever had a true conversation with the man. And I do believe you're right. I believe he loves you too."

Ziva's face lit into a 1000- Kilowatt smile. "We shall find out. I am cooking dinner for him tonight."

"Breakfast and dinner in one day? Interesting… just Ziva?"

"Yes?"

"You know that I love you, and I really want you and Tony to be happy. Just, don't rush into anything blindly. Make sure you are truly ready."

"Playing big brother again Josh? You do not have to worry. I know how crazy our relationship has been over the years. And I am not stupid. I know we have a lot to work out. He will not force me to do anything until I am ready. Tony is not like that."

"Okay. Just let me know if he tries. I'll sick Eden on him."

Ziva laughed. A knock at her door caught her attention. "I have to go there is someone at the door."

"It's probably Tony. He missed you already." He laughed.

"Goodbye Josh. Call if you need anything. I love you."

"I will. And I love you too."

Ziva disconnected the phone and went to check the peephole. Smiling, she opened the door.

"Gibbs." She said with a smile.

"Ziver." He entered her apartment but eyed her warily. Seeing her state he immediately became concerned. "I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd check to see how you were faring."

"Sit, please." She said gesturing towards the living room. "I am fine. I was just talking to Josh on the phone."

Gibbs immediately understood. "How is he doing?"

She sighed as she sat on the couch. "Not well, although he will not admit it. Yet, there is a sense of peace that has come over him. It is as if he is just trying to tie up all loose ends before…"

Gibbs nodded. "He wants to make sure everything is settled before he goes. That's understandable."

Ziva nodded. "Yes, but it is just hard to think about." Her head turned towards the baby monitor when the tell tale signs of an awake baby interrupted their conversation.

"Jacob seems to have a way of knowing when we have company. He woke up when Tony was here this morning too." She exited the room and didn't notice the look Gibbs gave her as she was leaving.

He smiled as he listened to her talking to the baby through the baby monitor. She returned to the room after a quick diaper change. Jacob's eye immediately locked onto Gibbs' when he noticed the older man in the room. "Yes, I know little one. Look who is here to see you."

Gibbs held his arms out allowing Ziva to hand him over easily. Gibbs expertly snuggled the baby to his chest and looked at the baby in wonder. "He's a handsome boy Ziva."

"Thanks. I tried my best." She joked.

He continued to stare down at the baby and remembering a time when Kelly was this small and fit snuggly against his chest. The baby stared up at Gibbs as if he was wondering who the older man was.

Gibbs allowed himself a rare smile down at the baby. Looking up at Ziva, he noted the ghost of a smile on her face. "You are very good with babies."

"Had some practice." He continued bonding with Jacob for several moments before he looked back at Ziva again. "You mentioned DiNozzo was here?"

She smiled. "Yes. I invited him over for breakfast. He had dropped off some gifts last night but I was sleeping. I wanted to thank him."

Gibbs adjusted the baby slightly in his arms. "He stopped by to drop of my truck and get his keys back. Didn't mention he was here."

Ziva suddenly felt butterflies in her stomach. 'He is here now. Be a grown woman dammit.' She chided herself.

"I am glad you stopped by Gibbs. There is something I would like to speak to you about."

"I thought so." He said cryptically.

She frowned slightly and hoped Jacob would continue to work his magic and keep Gibbs' softened up.

She took a deep breath. "It is…about Tony and me…" She suddenly stopped when Gibbs fixed his steely blue eyes on her.

Sighing, she began to lose her nerve. She stood quickly and disappeared into her bedroom. Gibbs looked down at the baby and smiled again. "Where is your silly Mommy going, huh?" He whispered, careful not to let Ziva hear him speaking to the baby this way.

Ziva opened her jewelry box and pulled out a red chip. She looked down at it and smiled, returning to the living room with it in her palm.

She sat back down on the sofa across from Gibbs. "When I returned from Somalia, my life was an absolute mess."

"I remember."

Inwardly she sighed at herself. 'This should not be this difficult.'

Finally, Gibbs had enough of her hesitation. "Ziva, will you just spit it out before I start comparing Jacob's chin to DiNozzo's?"

She looked at him strangely and then realized his intonation. "Oh no, no. Tony is not Jacob's father. No way."

Gibbs didn't look impressed either way. Ziva slid forward so she was sitting on the edge of the couch. She held out the chip in her hand.

Gibbs stared at it, a knot forming in the pit of his stomach. It was an old poker chip that had been laying around his basement workbench. He had jokingly given it to Ziva.

"When I returned from Somalia, you gave me this and told me it was my 'hall pass' so to speak. It would allow me one free pass to break one of your rules. I…I think that I have to give this back now."

"What rule did you break?"

"None yet."

Gibbs continued to hold the baby but used one hand to take the chip from her. "Rule 12?"

She nodded.

"Damn-" he muttered before sitting back in his chair.

Ziva suddenly felt panicked. "Gibbs, I know you do not approve. And I promise you that nothing has happened between Tony and I. However-"

"Something is happening now." He finished for her.

"Possibly. And I have thought a lot about this Gibbs. It is not against NCIS rules for agents to be 'involved' with one another. But it is against your rules. So, if you do not approve then I will return to the linguistics team when my maternity leave is up."

Gibbs looked at her incredulously. "You would give up field work to be with him."

Ziva gave Gibbs a steely look of her own. "Yes. Without hesitation. No more waiting, no more games."

Gibbs sighed. He flipped the poker chip back at Ziva. "Keep it." She looked at him strangely.

"I'm not stupid Ziva. I knew from day one that the two of would give me trouble. I didn't think it would take this long."

"So, you approve?" She asked.

"No. I've seen what happens in these situations Ziva."

She sighed and looked down.

"But, you know better than anyone how I feel about you and DiNozzo. More than anything, I want to see both of you happy."

She smiled.

"But, I'm telling you now Ziva. It you can't keep it out of the office, I will separate you. I cannot sacrifice the integrity of our investigations or even worse, someone's life because you two want to play grab ass."

She nodded. "We will not let you down."

Gibbs nodded and stood. "See to it that you don't." He handed Jacob back to Ziva. She looked at him strangely and took the baby, immediately realizing why Gibbs was handing him back.

"Jake, why did you have to wait until Mommy changed you before doing that!" She asked the baby, who again seemed to have a glint in your eyes.

"He's your son Ziva. He's going to do everything on his own and give you trouble every step of the way."

Ziva's nose wrinkled as she carried the smelly baby back to his bedroom. "Help yourself to the fridge. There is plenty in there."

She placed the baby on his changing table and grabbed a clean diaper and the baby wipes. Undoing the tape and opening the diaper she grimaced.

"Ugh!" She laid the diaper back over the baby to cover him while she grabbed wipes out of the container. Jake looked at her innocently.

"Do not give me that innocent look little man. Mommy learned that trick the hard way."

In the kitchen, Gibbs had pulled ingredients out of the fridge to make himself and Ziva and sandwich. He had to smile when he heard her warn the baby.

She returned a short time later just as Gibb's placed rather large turkey sandwiches on a plate, one for Ziva and one for himself.

Ziva was rolling the baby's bassinette out of her bedroom and into the living room. Gibbs smiled at her. "The baby got you huh?"

She laughed. "Yes, the first day he was born. I was changing his diaper when suddenly… who ever would have thought something so small could spray so high into the air."

Gibbs had to laugh. He gestured with his head towards the table. Ziva laid Jake down and went over looking at the lunch Gibbs had laid out for them.

"Todah." She said to him.

He shrugged. "You've got to keep your strength up."

She took a bite of her sandwich and then grabbed a napkin as the lettuce and tomato left juice on her chin. "Yes, Jake is definitely keeping me on my toes." She said once she had swallowed.

Gibbs smirked. "Yeah, and now you've got two children in your life. You're a glutton for punishment Ziver." She looked at Gibbs strangely. "Just wait until Jake and Tony are arguing over the Cap'N Crunch box." He smiled causing her to grin.

"Yes, it will definitely be challenging." She agreed.

"Just be honest and good to each other Ziver. If the two of you can do that, happiness will follow."

To be continued


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.

"Just One More….." Part 15

The most wonderful smells assaulted Tony's senses the moment Ziva opened her door. He could smell garlic, and tomato sauce which meant one thing to him…

She had cooked Italian.

She smiled at him when she opened the door. He held up a bottle of wine for her to view. "Non-alcoholic of course. We don't need any calls about Jake getting picked up DUI in the middle of the night." He joked.

"You have plans to be here in the middle of the night?" She asked with a glint in her eyes.

"Well, uh- I uh…." Tony began to stammer causing Ziva to laugh.

"Relax Tony. You are welcome to stay anytime you want. I have a spare bedroom. It was originally going to be Josh's when the baby was born but-" She trailed off causing Tony to reach his hand out and touch her cheek.

"Hey, thanks for the offer. I just might take you up on it sometime." He said.

She smiled and took the wine from him. "Dinner will be a little late. I got it in the oven later than planned." She confessed.

He smiled. "It's okay. You have your hands full here. I should be cooking for you."

He walked over to the bassinette and peered down at the baby. He was laying peacefully on his back, his head turned to the side with one tiny hand snuggled into his cheek.

"I swear Ziva. It's only been a few days but I swear he looks different. At first he looked exactly like you. Now… I don't know."

She smiled. "I have read that it is normal. When they are born their skin tone, everything looks different. He was living in a liquid environment for nine months. I have noticed the difference as well."

Tony continued to study him. "He doesn't look anything like Josh." He noted.

"No, he would not. Josh could not donate. The radiation and chemo therapy... We had to use an anonymous donor."

"Really?"

She nodded. "It took a little while. We had to find a fertility doctor I could feel comfortable with. And then it came down to choosing the right donor. Josh and I narrowed it down to three potential candidates. I allowed him to make the final decision."

She moved over to Tony's side and peered down at the baby. "He does look a lot like my family."

Tony glanced at her quickly and noticed the sad look on her face. "Why do you think that?"

"He looks like Ari did when he was newborn. I remember seeing photos."

Tony turned his attention from the baby and looked at her fully. "Were you two close?" He ventured. For the longest time, the mere mention of Ari's name would make Ziva uncomfortable, enough to the point where she would sometimes squirm.

However, she hadn't mentioned Ari's name is a long time. Tony took a shot in the dark that he would be able to get her to open up about her mysterious brother.

"We were. " Her discomfort became evident. However, she took a deep breath and continued. "I was just a baby when he came to live with us. So, I do not ever remember him not being in my life. Ari always made it a point to be at all of my dance recitals. My own father never made it to a single one, but I always knew I could look out in the audience and see Ari sitting there next to my mother. "

"I would never do that to my kid." Ziva looked at him curiously. "Miss a chance to see them perform." He explained.

She shrugged. "My father looked at my dance classes as training. Nothing more. From the moment I was able to walk he pushed my mother to enroll me in dance. It made me flexible and agile. Easier to train to fight when the time was right."

"Did Eli do the same thing to Tali?"

She moved over and sat on the couch, patting the spot next to her. He smiled slightly and sat. "Yes, he tried. But Tali never would be able to go into the field. Ari and I spoiled her behind his back. He made sure that Ari and I were cold blooded killers, but we would not allow him to do that to our baby sister."

"You're not a cold blooded killer Ziva." Tony whispered.

"Tony, if only you knew…"

"Then tell me." He prompted.

"I first killed a man when I was seventeen. I rode on the back of a motorcycle Ari was driving, pulled out my gun and shot a suspected Hamas terrorist. Afterwards, I curled into a ball on the floor of my hotel room and cried. Ari sat on the floor next to me, holding me. Rocking me back and forth, telling me that it would be okay. THAT is the big brother I want to remember. Not the monster he turned into."

"Kate once told me that there was something in his eyes that stopped her from killing him the time he broke into autopsy."

Ziva's eyes dropped. "And that mistake cost her life." She mumbled.

Tony shifted to a more comfortable position. He eyed Ziva carefully. "You don't blame yourself for what Ari did, do you?"

She still did not meet his gaze. "At first I did. But then I realized exactly how deep his hatred for Father ran. Sadly, I thought Ari's death brought me closer to my Father than I had ever been."

"Why?"

She met his gaze and Tony could see her eyes were filled with tears. "When I walked off of the plane with Ari's casket, my Father hugged me and told me he was proud of me. It was the first time he had ever said that."

Tony allowed her a moment to compose herself. "Why was he proud of you? I mean, Ari had you fooled like he did a lot of people."

Ziva looked at Tony. "What do you know about what happened in Gibbs basement that day?"

Tony shrugged. "I read the report. Gibbs came home and found Ari in his basement. Ari had Gibbs' sniper rifle and was threatening him with it. You arrived in time to hear Ari confess to what he did. You were able to distract him and Gibbs' pulled his extra weapon and shot him."

"Gibbs never told you?" She asked.

"Told me what?" He asked.

She sighed. "Are you really sure that I am not a cold blooded killer Tony?"

He reached out and touched her cheek, smoothing back a couple of curls that had fallen free from her ponytail. "Of course I am."

"Would you still think that if I told you that Gibbs was not the one who killed Ari?" She asked quietly.

Tony smiled slightly. "What-" and then it dawned on him. Gibbs had placed his trust in Ziva almost immediately. Tony never did understand why he took to her so quickly, when he, McGee, and even Kate had to work at earning his trust.

"You shot Ari?"

Tears rolled silently down her cheeks as she allowed the news to sink in. Finally, she spoke. "My father suspected that Ari was a traitor, that he'd turned. He had issued an order for Ari to be eliminated. Several agents had volunteered for the mission, but I convinced Father to allow me to do it. I was positive that Ari was innocent, that all the Intel and feelings Father had was wrong. I did not want anyone executing my brother on false information. I thought I would come to Washington, prove my brother's innocence and we could both return home to Israel safely."

Tony idly wiped a few tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. He did not speak a word. He knew that Ziva was baring a large part of her soul to him. He didn't want to spoil the moment by saying the wrong thing. So instead, he offered her comfort and solace through his touch.

It seemed to help. She smiled slightly and wiped her face.

"He lied to me." She said quietly. "He lied to me for the first time ever. He swore to me he was still working his undercover mission. He swore that everything would be alright. As soon as I was able to get his passport and money to him, we were going to meet in Paris. We used to do that a lot. He would whisk Tali and I off for a weekend in Paris. He would spoil us, buy us clothes and treats, let us drink champagne even when we were too young. We used to laugh until our sides hurt. Our trips to Paris were some of my best memories ever. We had not been to Paris together since Tali died. So when he said we'd meet in Paris, I thought-" Her voice trailed off.

"Of course you'd think that. He was your brother." Ziva's head snapped up a bit when Tony spoke those words. She remembers speaking almost the same words to Gibbs when she'd returned from Somalia.

She took a deep breath and paused again. It was almost as if she was searching her memory. "That night at the hotel, before I went to meet the courier between Ari and I, I called Father to update him. I told him of my conversations with Ari, and meeting everyone at NCIS. Father told me to find a way to gain Gibbs' trust. I already knew Director Sheppard well. However, he knew that Gibbs would be the 'tough sell' so to speak. He felt that one day, we may need the cooperation of NCIS, especially a man with a reputation like Gibbs."

Tony attempted to alleviate the moment with some humor. "You know, I thought that bathing suit you wore that night was way too conservative. I much preferred the suit you had on in Los Angeles."

She smiled at his attempt, again wiping her face. "I only wore that suit to get your attention Tony." She confessed.

"Really?" He asked, genuinely surprised. She merely shrugged yet continued to hold a trace of a smile on her face.

He grinned but reached out and took her hand. "Go on."

She squeezed his hand and looked down, staring at their conjoined hands intently. "Gibbs came up with a plan. He was going to set a trap for Ari. He knew Ari would confess to him. I would hide in the background and help Gibbs if he needed it. Ari was waiting for Gibbs in his basement. They talked while I stood up in the laundry room. Not only did Ari confess, he actually gloated about what he had done. He tried to blame it all on Father."

"Your Father does share in some of the blame." Tony pointed out.

"Some of it, yes. But Ari made his own decisions, just like I made my own decisions leading up to Somalia."

Tony shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "A lot of people made a lot of decisions leading up to Somalia." He said softly.

She nodded slightly and continued to stare at their hands, playing with his fingers gently. "Ari aimed the rifle at Gibbs' forehead. I-" She struggled with her words. "I took Ari out just like he did Kate, one shot through the forehead. He died never knowing it was me."

Tony squeezed her hand tightly, allowing Ziva the time to cry. "Maybe it was better that way, him not knowing it was you."

She didn't speak for several moments before finally whispering; "I've never seen him look that peaceful." She confessed.

Tony decided it was time to change the subject. "Well, I still think your bathing suit was too conservative. The next time you're swimming and I'm leering at you, make sure it shows off a lot more skin, okay?"

She laughed softly; but then met his eyes. "There will be no more public swimming for me Tony. Not now."

Tony looked at her strangely. "Oh come on. You just gave birth a few days ago and you've almost got your figure back. Well, at least MOST of it." He said, leering at her breasts.

"Tony! " She said punching him gently in the arm. "They are **NOT** a toy. They are nurturing my son!" She laughed.

He shrugged as his face broke into a lecherous smile.

"Besides," She continued. "That was not what I was speaking of. Pregnancy weight I can lose. Scars from Somalia I cannot."

The smile dropped quickly from his face. " I was afraid you were going to say that." He said softly, his eyes dropping from hers.

She reached her hand out and placed it on his cheek, gently lifting his face so their eyes met. "Please do not do that Tony."

"What?"

"Look away from me when I mention Somalia."

"I didn't realize that I was."

She nodded and raised her brows. "It happened Tony. We cannot pretend it did not."

"I know. I just- I just wish I could have gotten to you sooner."

"I wish I had trusted you and Gibbs instead of looking for something that was not there."

"What was it you were looking for?" He asked.

She sighed and leaned back into the sofa., contemplating opening her entire soul up to him. Remembering Josh's words, she loosened her grip on his hand slightly and cocked her head to the side. "I was looking for this; being able to sit at home at night with dinner cooking, children near by… and someone to share it with."

Tony smiled. "You were looking for the American Dream." He pointed out.

"Well, I don't know about the white picket fence and the dog, but yes, I suppose I was."

"And now you've got it."

She smiled. "Yes… yes I do. And, may I confess one more thing?"

"Anything." He said smiling.

"I am glad it is you that I am sharing it with." She blushed slightly which caused Tony's heart to melt.

"I'm glad that I'm the one you're sharing it with too." He confessed.

She let go of his hand and reached up to brush his bangs back from his forehead. She then laid her hand flat against his left cheek.

"From the moment we met…there was just something there. I do not know what it is, or how to describe it. I did not even know you for a whole day before I was opening myself up to you. I very rarely talk to anyone about Tali. Yet, I felt like I could trust you immediately."

"It goes back to the whole soul mates question. The day you asked me, I knew what you were insinuating. But I was afraid."

"Of me?" She asked innocently.

"No, yes- well… sort of. I was afraid of what you represented. You burst into my life at one of the worst times and just swept me off my feet. Beautiful, sexy, sassy… standing in front of your hotel that night after you trusted me enough to talk about your sister, I felt that connection too. I couldn't explain it then… I can't explain it now. "

She smiled again. "What did you think it was that night?"

"Lust. I mean jeez- look at you!" He exclaimed causing her to blush again. "All I wanted to do was run upstairs, knock on your door and loose myself in you." He confessed.

The kitchen timer began to buzz breaking the moment. "About time, I am famished." Ziva said, hopping off the couch. Grabbing her oven mitts off the counter, she reached into the oven and pulled a steaming tray of lasagna out.

"Oh man, I'm in heaven!" Tony exclaimed, realizing right away what Ziva had made.

She smiled. Reaching into the fridge, she pulled out a pan of oven ready garlic bread and popped it into the oven.

"Just a few more minutes. It will give the cheese time to set while the bread cooks."

She began walking back to the couch but stopped momentarily to check on Jacob. He was laying there with his eyes wide open staring at her. "Well hello little one, have you been listening in on our conversation?"

She scooped him up grabbed a receiving blanket from the side of the bassinette. She looked at Tony and smiled. "It is time for his dinner as well."

She arranged herself and the baby next to Tony. Tony watched as she again was able to reach under the blanket and without looking, get the baby situated and sucking greedily.

"Are women born with that intuition, to just be able to do that without looking?" He joked.

She smiled. "It took some practice. I do not believe it is intuition. Jake is on a particular schedule and if we deviate from it even slightly….let us just say it is not pleasant."

Tony silently watched the emotions play over her face as the baby ate. She lifted the blanket slightly and check on him, a slight smile playing over her face.

"I wish I could share that with you. You look so peaceful… so beautiful." He whispered.

She looked at him suddenly, her eyes a bit glassy. "You can. I have a breast pump. If I can figure out how to use it I will pump some breast milk so you may feed him as well."

He smiled and reached forward to play with her loose hair. "I'd like that."

The oven timer went off again signaling that the bread was ready. Tony stood to get it as Ziva finished up with Jacob. "You're not that hungry this time, huh?" She asked the baby. Tony began cutting the lasagna as he watched Ziva fumbled under the blanket again, this time getting herself put back together before she began burping the baby.

"Ziva, this smells wonderful."

"Thanks. I cannot wait to eat. I feel like all I do is eat, sleep, breast feed and change diapers."

Tony smiled at her. "Well, I guess that is all I can do." She continued.

He set two plates of food on the table. Ziva stood and brought Jacob to the table with her, sliding the bassinette over closer to her chair in case he started to drift off to sleep again.

Tony held his hands out. "Here, let me take him while you eat something."

She smiled and handed Jake to him. She took a bite of food and closed her eyes, letting the myriad of tastes wash over her. "Mmmm." She moaned immediately grabbing Tony's attention.

Tony looked down at Jake. "You hear that Jake? Your Mommy is a big tease."

The baby looked up at him as Tony continued. "Of course, you've got it made. You get all of Mommy's attention, you get to sleep, eat and chill out all day. Wait until you're old enough to go to school. Everyone is going to want to be your friend because you've got such a hot Mommy!" The baby's expression changed slightly and Tony could almost swear that he had a hint of a smile on his face.

"Look Ziva, he agrees. He's smiling!"

She smiled and shook her head, remembering the words Gibbs had spoken to her earlier. "He really does like you Tony. He is comfortable with you."

Tony smiled and looked down at him. "That's cuz we're cut from the same cloth, aren't we? We both adore a certain someone who may or may not be in this apartment with us right now, huh?"

Ziva's fork stopped halfway to her mouth. She looked at Tony whose attention was still locked on the baby. 'He doesn't realize what he said.' She thought to herself.

They continued eating dinner and chatting about nothing in particular, taking turns holding the baby so the other could eat peacefully. As they finished up their meal, Jake started to nod off.

"I better get him washed and changed." She stood and began to walk towards the hallway. "Do you want to help?" She asked.

Tony smiled and stood from the table following her down the hall. She laid Jake on the changing table and turned to Tony. "Can you stay with him for just a second?"

"Sure." He walked over and laid his hand on Jake's full belly. Jake's small hand popped out of his blanket and found Tony's hand. The older man marveled at the small hand compared to his. Tony took his pointer finger and placed it within Jake's grasp. He hand immediately closed around it as he looked up.

"If you two keep bonding like that I might get jealous." He heard Ziva say from the doorway. He smiled and turned to her. "He is…" Tony couldn't think of an adjective.

"The most wonderful baby in the world?" Ziva asked as she reached Tony's side, placing a small basin of warm water next to Jake. Reaching under the changing table, she grabbed a wash cloth and placed it in the basin.

Tony used free hand and dipped his fingers into the water to feel the temperature. Ziva smiled at Tony's willingness to learn. She reached forward and unwrapped Jake's blanket leaving him clad only in a white T-shirt and diaper. Ziva hated having to break the hold Jake had on Tony's fingers but didn't have a choice. Slipping his arms out of the T-shirt, Ziva slid it over his head.

Tony cringed at the sight of Jake's belly button…or what would be his belly button. "It's where the umbilical cord was cut. It'll eventually dry and fall off in the two weeks or so."

"Does it hurt him?" He asked.

She smiled and shook her head. "Here, you use the warm washcloth and wipe, I'll dry behind you so he doesn't get cold."

Tony picked up the cloth and squeezed the excess liquid from it. "Soap?" He asked.

She shook her head. "No, just water. He's too small to use baby wash yet."

Tony nodded and began washing the baby's face first, then moving to his neck. Once the cloth began to feel a little cool, Tony dipped it back in the water and moved down Jake's arms and chest, careful not to hit the cord stump.

Ziva's hands expertly followed behind Tony. "Do you want me to get the rest?" She asked Tony. He nodded, not sure enough in handling the baby to risk lifting him. Ziva took the cloth and made quick work of washing and drying. She then wrapped the blanket around him while she went to the baby's dresser, taking out a clean shirt.

"Once his cord comes off, he can start wearing the outfits you gave him." She told Tony who smiled. "And now the fun part."

Tony took the initiative and grabbed a clean diaper from the pile on the table. He laid it next to Jake and pulled the tapes on the diaper he was already wearing. The front dropped immediately and Tony immediately gawked and cringed.

"Oh my god, what did they do to you?" He exclaimed a little loudly. The baby didn't jump however, he continued to watch Tony as if he was the most fascinating being on the planet.

Ziva smirked. "It's where he was circumcised Tony." She explained.

"Yeah but, jeez. A little bandage and all?" He cringed again.

"Tony, I wouldn't leave his diaper open like that for too long." She warned.

"Oh yeah." He took the rag and handed it to Ziva who quickly finished washing the baby with Tony's hands drying right behind her. She put the fresh diaper on and wrapped the blanket back around him. "All done!" She exclaimed.

She kept her hand on the baby but looked at Tony expectantly. He couldn't help but smile and scooped Jake up. "So, here's a stupid question. If he's too young for baby wash, and you didn't put powder or lotion on him, where does that smell come from?"

She smiled. "That baby smell?"

"Yeah, I can smell it on myself every time I hold him."

"It's just him. Nothing more." She said with a smile.

Tony looked impressed and moved back into the living room. Ziva dumped the bath water, tossed the diaper in the pail and threw the dirty t-shirt into the laundry. Returning to the living area, she started clearing the table and loading the dishwasher, all the while watching Tony with the baby.

'If only he was yours.' She thought to herself as she watched Tony make goofy faces at Jacob.

"Are you okay in there?" She called softly.

Tony smiled at her and nodded. "Yeah, I think he's falling asleep anyway."

She finished in the kitchen and joined Tony in the living room. "Oh yes, he is done for a while."

Tony smiled down at the now sleeping infant in his arms. "Being the life of the party will do that to you."

She laughed softly and took Jake from Tony carrying him into his room and placing him in his crib. "Goodnight sweet one." She whispered.

Tony listened to the tenderness in her voice and yearned to hear her whispering to him like that.

He heard her come back into the room behind him. "Well, it's starting to get late. I really should go. I've got work tomorrow. And you need some rest."

"I try to catch naps while he is sleeping. However he is starting to stay awake longer and longer. It must be the excitement of the company he is keeping."

Tony stood and began to make his way to the door. "Just remember, the company isn't just for him." Tony reminded her.

She moved to the kitchen counter and grabbed a plastic container. "Here Tony, I packed some leftovers for you."

"Oh, thanks! And thanks for everything. Dinner was delicious."

She walked with him to the door. "We shall do it again soon, yes?"

"Yes. Tomorrow night. I'll cook." She began to protest but he placed a finger on her mouth. "No arguments."

She smiled and nodded quickly. Tony opened the door and shifted from foot to foot. He really wanted to kiss her goodnight, although he really wanted nothing more than to stay with her forever.

Their eyes locked and something electric passed between them. She felt a rush of heat in her cheeks which caused Tony to look away, the moment broken.

He stepped back and through the door. "Good night Ziva. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." Her hand was on the doorknob as he began to walk down the hallway. "Oh, and Tony?"

He stopped and turned. "Yeah?"

"That night, at the Embassaro Hotel? Even with everything going on… if you had knocked on my door. I would have let you in."

With that, she closed the door and slid the deadbolt in place.

Tony stood for several moments with a stupid grin on his face before he left for home.

To be continued


	16. Chapter 16

**Again, thank you so much for all of your reviews and comments, it makes my day to see that people are still reading this story… which seems to be turning into a monster that keeps growing and growing and growing…**

**I want to dedicate this to all the TIVA fans who hang out at the CBS Message board. I wish I had the time to post more, however it makes my day to be able to go and read other fans that enjoy this couple AND get along. I searched around for an NCIS group I could feel comfortable with, and I finally found it. (With over 7,600 pages of messages to boot!) You guys are the best and keep the faith alive!**

**It appears that I am sharing thoughts with some of my reviewers. I had this chapter done and another half written and when I saw the reviews, I had to laugh. Give me back my brain waves!**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

**

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****"Just One More….." Part 16**

Tony had arrived at the office by 0700. Sitting alone in the bullpen, he glanced around and wondered why in the hell he was sitting at his desk on a Sunday.

'Because it's our turn to take weekend duty.' He reminded himself. He sorted through paperwork only half paying attention. Occasionally he'd stop and stare at Ziva's empty desk, his wind awhirl with all the changes in their relationship.

He had come close to admitting his feelings for her last night. Well, in a way, he had. Ziva didn't think he had realized what he said, but he knew exactly what he'd admitted. He had found a way to say it without making her feel pressured or cornered. The last thing he wanted to do was to scare her off. If Ziva retreated back into her shell after all they'd shared in the last few days, he wasn't sure he'd be able to handle it.

McGee arrived around 0730 and was again surprised to see Tony hard at work at his desk. "Hot date last night Tony?" He joked, seeing the jovial mood Tony was in.

Tony smiled. "Just the best date EVER!" McGee shook his head slightly and smiled as he sat at his desk and booted up his computer.

"Up all night? Didn't bother going to bed?" McGee teased.

Tony's attention again wandered to the empty desk across from him. "Oh, I went to bed. Not much sleep though."

McGee rolled his eyes and began logging into his system. Tony was oblivious to McGee at that point. He had spoken to the truth. He'd gone to bed fairly early, however sleep eluded him.

Truth be told, not only was his mind whirling in regards to Ziva, but also because of Jake. By the time he'd reached his car last night, he found that he already missed the little guy. He had an urge to be with Ziva and the baby all the time. He suddenly found his apartment cold and lonely, nothing like the feelings he had in Ziva's.

'Wow, you've got it bad DiNozzo.' He thought to himself.

The sound of the elevator door's opening drew his attention. Gibbs' came striding into the bullpen, ever present cup of coffee in hand. He walked straight towards DiNozzo.

"Morning boss!" Tony stated rather curtly. Gibbs walked straight to him and smacked him on the back of the head.

McGee just stared as DiNozzo rubbed the back of his head. "What was that for?" Tony asked.

Gibbs sat at his desk and began shuffling folders around. "For not having the balls to talk to me when your girlfriend did."

McGee's face scrunched in confusion, glancing between Tony and Gibbs. He was surprised to see Tony with an enormous smile on his face.

"Girlfriend-" He muttered out loud as he continued to smile like an idiot.

"Okay, I'm definitely missing something." McGee said.

Gibbs didn't bother to pay attention to either of them. He continued to work as if nothing had happened.

Tony eventually turned back to his paperwork. 'Maybe if I get all of this done, Gibbs will let us go early.' He thought.

He was surprised when his stomach told him that it was time to eat. Glancing at the clock, he realized it was lunch time. Reaching into his desk drawer, he pulled out the large plastic container Ziva had given him the night before.

"Uh Boss, I have leftover lasagna here if you'd like some. McDiet, I know you've sworn off carbs."

McGee smiled and turned back to his computer. Gibbs took Tony's invitation for what it was… him wanting a few minutes to talk.

"Sure DiNozzo, I'll meet you in the break room."

Tony took the container and spoon he'd managed to remember to grab and headed off to the break room. He popped the lid on the container and began to microwave it. Gibbs' arrived a few minutes later with two cups of coffee in hand. He sat and placed one across from him, obviously for Tony.

Tony grabbed some plastic plates and forks from the cabinets and sat down with the now steaming food. He offered Gibbs first dibs at spooning some out while he tasted the coffee.

Lot of cream and sugar, just like Tony liked it.

Gibbs gingerly tested the food careful not to burn himself. "Not bad, Ziva definitely can cook."

"How did you know Ziva made it?"

"She'd made trays of it for me before. She insists on keeping ready made meals in my freezer. Something I can just heat and eat."

Tony was fascinated. "Really? I didn't know that."

Gibbs took another bite before laying down his fork. "She started right after Somalia. Once we were able to work a few things out, she spent a lot of time at my house. I think she was afraid to be alone although she wouldn't admit it. Some mornings I'd wake up and find her asleep on my sofa. I don't know how she'd get there. I'd see her at the office later acting as if nothing happened. Next thing I knew, I started finding my freezer stocked with pre-cooked dinners."

"I'm not really surprised. After what she went through in Somalia, I guess she needed to comfort of knowing someone was near by."

Gibbs ate another bite. "She's talking to you about Somalia? That's good."

Tony swallowed his mouthful before he answered. "Yeah." Tony glanced around the room to ensure they were alone. "It was bad Gibbs. She was gang raped, got pregnant by one of those sick monsters. Saleem then beat the baby out of her instead of getting a doctor."

Gibbs placed his fork on his plate before he dropped it. "I knew she couldn't have children naturally. I didn't know why."

Tony allowed his food to settle a bit before continuing. "She also mentioned having some physical scars, but I don't know what those are from."

Gibbs began to eat again. "She's really placing a lot of trust in you." He pointed out.

"I know. I want her to feel comfortable enough to be able to share everything with me."

"Are you ready for this DiNozzo?"

Tony stopped mid-bite and looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"I have no doubt about the feelings you and Ziva have for each other. A blind man would be able to see that. But DiNozzo, she's not your typical everyday fling. She's got scars yeah, but a lot of them are emotional. She hasn't had an easy life, and she has no experience knowing what a real loving, emotionally deep relationship is. In a lot of ways, you're going to be her first."

Tony had stopped eating and allowed Gibbs words to sink in. Finally, Gibbs spoke again, "And on top of all that, are you ready to be a Father too?"

For a reason unbeknownst to Tony, he felt a sudden flash of anger towards Gibbs. "I don't want to NOT be part of Jake's life now. And Ziva, I know she's got emotional issues, but I do too. We both know this, which is why we want to take this slow and do not only what's best for us, but for the baby too."

Gibbs grinned slightly as he used a napkin to wipe his mouth. "What else have you guys talked about?"

Tony looked Gibbs straight in the eye. "The night Ari died."

Gibbs dropped his napkin on his empty plate and sighed. "Yeah?"

"She told me that she was the one who killed him. "

Gibbs crossed his arms over his chest. "For years, I believed that she killed her own brother to save me. It was the entire basis of our relationship. She did that to save me, a complete stranger to her. Between that and everything Jenny had told me about her, I truly believed I could trust her with my life. And then after we left Israel, Vance told me that it was all a ploy her father put together to gain my trust."

"Vance told you that?"

He nodded. "Apparently Eli bragged about it to Vance while we were in Israel. Just twisting the knife a little deeper in light of everything else that was going on."

Tony sighed. "I know it's not like that now Gibbs. Maybe then, before she got to know you, but now…" His voice trailed off.

"Now, she thinks of me as the Father she's never had." Gibbs admitted.

Tony watched him closely. "That makes you proud." He pointed out.

Gibbs smiled. "I chose my team for a reason. I don't place my trust in just anyone. I want the best for all of you. And if that means invoking Rule 51 where you and Ziva are concerned then I will do it. But I'll tell you the same thing I told her. Keep it out of the office. One slightest hint that you two can't keep it professional behind these doors I'll split you up."

Tony nodded. "Got it boss."

Gibbs stood and threw the remnants of his lunch away. He grabbed his coffee cup and began leaving the room. "Oh and DiNozzo?"

"Yeah boss?" Tony turned to him.

"I'm proud of you son." He said softly before disappearing through the door.

To Be Continued


	17. Chapter 17

**I'm going to dedicate this chapter to the two masters of Tiva, Michael Weatherly and Cote de Pablo. Could they have found two people more perfect to play these roles? Nope, no way.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

**Again, it's rated T for a reason folks.**

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"Just One More….." Part 17

Gibbs finally took pity on DiNozzo as he sat at his desk taking turns fidgeting while he stared wistfully at Ziva's desk. At 1300, he told him to leave because he was making him nervous just watching him.

Tony had practically ran to his car and as soon as he pulled out of the Navy Yard, headed towards Ziva's apartment. However, on a whim, he changed direction and headed towards the hospital.

He paused momentarily outside of Josh's room when he heard the tell tale signs of someone vomiting. He knocked on the doorframe and entered and stopped at the sight before him.

Josh was bent over the side of his bed quickly filling up a basin that Eden was holding. She was on her knees on his bed, leaning over him and using her one free hand to rub his back. She looked at Tony with a cross between worry and exhaustion before turning her attention back to Josh.

The bout of nausea was just coming to an end. Josh flopped back onto his pillows, exhaustion evident in his face. "See, this one wasn't so bad." Eden whispered to him, wiping sweat off his forehead before she climbed off of the bed and headed towards the bathroom with the basin.

"Hey Tony." She mumbled as she disappeared into the bathroom. Josh opened his eyes and focused on his guest.

"Tony, please come on in. Sorry about that." He said, his voice hoarse. Tony glanced into the open bathroom to see Eden standing at the sink with tears rolling down her face. She shared a look with Tony before she dumped the basin and began rinsing it.

"I shouldn't have just dropped by." Tony said as he stepped forward hoping he could block Josh's view of Eden's meltdown in the bathroom.

"No please. If you can handle walking in on that then you can handle anything. Besides, from what I heard you're almost family. Sit."

Tony sat one of the free chairs. "I just thought I'd stop by to see how you're doing." He said awkwardly. Josh smiled weakly.

"Well, that latest round of tossing my cookies comes courtesy of this-" He lifted his arm which had an IV with a strange colored fluid dripping through the tube.

"Chemo?" Tony asked.

He nodded. "It's not doing any good. A few more rounds and the doctors are going to hang it up. What will be will be." He whispered.

Tony shook his head. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I've had a good life. I didn't get to accomplish everything that I wanted to but… I came close."

Eden then exited the bathroom looking as put together as the day Tony met her. She sat in a chair across from Tony. "So, what are you boys whispering about?"

"About how exhausted you look, how you should go home and get some rest." Josh said.

"I can sleep right here if I want to."

"Yeah you can but you'll be disturbed while you try to sleep. Please Eden." Josh implored.

She was about to argue when Tony felt the need to butt in. "Really Eden, you look like crap." He said.

She shot Tony a look that could've extinguished a star. "Really? So this is how it is, two of you ganging up on me?" She asked.

Josh smiled. "Well, you know. Testosterone is stronger than estrogen anyway."

Tony smiled and continued to watch the interaction between the two of them. Eden sat stubbornly in her chair and glared at Josh.

Josh threw a withering look at Tony. Finally, he threw down his ace. "Eden, I really want you to go check on Ziva. Maybe bring me back some pictures of the baby?" He asked.

Eden knew what his game was. "You know what, you are a real bastard!"

"Why?"

"Because you know there's no way in hell I can say 'no' to that!" She grabbed her purse and started stomping out of the room, stopping momentarily to punch Tony in the arm.

"Ow, what was that for?" He asked.

"For siding with him!" She then spun on Josh. "And who the hell said you have testostrone?" She said with a huff before leaving.

Josh laughed weakly. "She'll be over it by the time she's in her car." He said.

Tony looked at the doorway and then back at Josh. "Either that or she's going to get Ziva's knife collection."

Josh smiled. "You may be right. So really, what brings you by?"

Tony sighed. "I really did want to see how you were. Plus, I wanted to talk to you…about Ziva and I."

Josh shifted so he was facing Tony. "There's a Ziva and you now?"

Tony shrugged. "I think so. I mean, we've been talking. A lot. About a lot of things. And she's been teaching me how to care for Jacob."

Josh nodded. "That little guy has a way of wrapping around your heart and not letting go."

Tony smiled and nodded. "That he does. But, I just wanted…" He paused.

Josh allowed him a moment. "What do you want Tony?" He asked.

Tony ran his hand nervously through his hair. He exhaled loudly before he answered. "You encouraged me to go to Ziva, to get her to talk to me. I have a feeling that you were also doing to same with her, trying to get her to open up to me."

Josh nodded his confirmation.

Tony continued. "There's a reason for that. I'm not sure what it is."

"That's easy Tony. Ziva loves you. She has for a long time."

Tony sat back in his chair. "She told you that?"

Josh grinned. "Yeah. She struggled with her feelings for you from almost the moment you met. I know she suffered over some girlfriend you had. I don't know the particulars. But then she was excited because the two of you were getting close again, and then she was shipped back to Tel Aviv. She thought your relationship was taking off. She was ready to quit Mossad and return to America to be with you."

Tony's heart dropped. "But Michael-"

Josh put his hand up. "Michael meant nothing to Ziva at first. He was a friend, nothing more. She waited and waited for you to call. I don't know what happened, but her heart was broken. Michael was there, ready to pick up the pieces. She thought you didn't love her. She also thought that you couldn't reconcile the person she was to the person she wanted to be. Michael knew her secrets. When she tried to share them with you, you'd push her away. She was thinking about having a family, a future that she could look forward to, not one where she would be dead by the age of thirty."

"So she reached out to the first man closest to her?" Tony mumbled.

Josh nodded. "In a way, yes. Tony, Ziva's never been in love. She never had a serious boyfriend that didn't involve a mission. Eli had her entire life mapped out from the minute she was born. Love, marriage, children didn't fit into that plan. When he realized that her time in America was starting to steer her in that direction, he had to do what he could to bring her 'back into the fold'. Unfortunately, Michael was all too willing to get on Eli's good side."

"And even with what you know, all the mistakes we've made, you're okay with me stepping into your place as Jacob's father?"

Josh broke his eye contact and shifted uncomfortable in his bed. "I don't know you that well Tony. But I know Ziva. I know how much she loves you. That has to count for something. And if you're able to open your heart to Jacob, then I am absolutely 100% okay with that."

Not knowing what else to do, Tony stood and reached out and shook Josh's hand. "Thanks."

Josh bowed his head slightly. He appeared pale and weakened. "You look like you're exhausted. I'll sit with you until you fall asleep." Tony said.

"You don't have to do that." Josh said.

"I know. But Ziva would be here if she could be. Since she can't, I will."

"Over in the closet… my keys are in my pants pocket. The silver key is for Ziva's apartment. Take it. You'll have better use of it than I will." He said as sleep began to overtake him.

Tony stayed put in his chair for another twenty minutes, just to make sure Josh was asleep. He went over and took the key, glancing one more time at the weakened man laying in bed.

"You're a good friend." Tony said softly before he exited the room.

* * *

Across town, Eden knocked softly on Ziva's door. Not receiving a response, she used her key to let herself in. Laying the key on the countertop, she walked down the hallway and peeked into Ziva's bedroom. She was sprawled across the bed, sleeping peacefully. The baby's bassinette was nearby. Eden crossed over quietly and was met with a pair of deep brown eyes staring up at her.

"Hey there sweet pea." She whispered. She lifted Jacob up and exited the room quickly in case he began to cry. "There's my good boy, letting Mommy get some sleep." Eden checked his diaper and immediately took him into his room and laid him on the changing table.

"You are a good boy. You're soaking wet and didn't make a peep." She quickly changed him and brought him out the living room. "I promised I'd take some pictures of you back to the hospital. You won't mind, will you?"

Jacob stared up at her. But before she could get her camera, he started to fuss. "Ut oh." She said. She went to the fridge and pulled open the door. "Damn. Okay, I know what you want. But it doesn't look like your Mommy has any in here." She reached into the cabinet overhead and found the powdered formula. She grabbed one of the bottles and poured four ounces of filtered water in it. Quickly, she emptied the packet of formula and shook it vigorously to mix it. Thankfully the bottle warmer was out and plugged in on the countertop.

"I know, I know baby, I'm trying." She soothed as she silently begged the warmer to finish before the crying infant woke Ziva up.

Finally it was done. She grabbed the bottle and moved over to the couch, testing it to make sure the formula wasn't too hot. Satisfied, she shook it one more time to ensure the powder was all dissolved and gave it to the baby.

At first, he didn't seem too sure. However, after a few tries, he made up his mind that it was an okay substitute and drank greedily.

"There you go, see? Not so bad. Not as good as Mommy but it'll suffice. Huh?"

Jake of course, didn't answer.

"I could have gotten him Eden." She heard a sleepy voice behind her say.

"Nah it's okay. Situation under control. He's drinking the formula without a problem."

Ziva nodded and sat in the chair across from the couch. "I should have had breast milk ready. I'm sorry."

Eden shook her head. "Formula every once in a while won't hurt. He doesn't seem to have discriminating tastes."

Ziva smiled. "The breast pump is still in the box. I have not had a chance to pull it out."

"You're a single mother Ziva. It's okay."

"No, I should have done it last night. But Tony was here and we got wrapped up-" Her voice trailed off when Eden's eyebrow raised.

"Reeallly?" She asked.

Ziva shook her head. "Not like that. I do not even think I can do THAT at this point."

"Well, I would hope not. You just gave birth less than a week ago!"

"No, that is not what I meant."

"Somalia?"

Ziva nodded. "I have not tried…"

"Don't push yourself Ziva. When the time's right, you'll know."

"I just, I want to… to have intimacy with him. But, what if I cannot?"

"There's other ways to share intimacy until you're ready." Eden reminded her.

Ziva nodded. "I know, I've been thinking about that. How is Josh?"

Eden shook her head. "Not good. The chemo is making him very sick. The doctors don't think it's working."

Ziva sighed. "This is really happening isn't it? We are really going to lose him."

Eden nodded and reached out her hand to Ziva. "But we've got each other. And you've got Tony. We'll get through it."

Ziva nodded and yawned. "How long were you asleep?" Eden asked her.

Ziva glanced at the clock. "About forty-five minutes I guess. I pushed myself too much yesterday. I started bleeding a little heavier so I thought I should take it easy."

Eden glared at her. "What do you need me to do?"

Ziva shook her head. "Nothing. I just need to sit and relax a bit more. No more cooking large meals for a few days."

"Why don't you go lay down. I'll take care of Jacob until he falls back to sleep and lock up behind myself."

"Are you sure?"

"Go!" Eden ordered.

Ziva stood and smiled. "Thanks." She hugged her friend gently and padded back into her bed. Once the baby was fed and burped, Eden snapped a few pics for Josh and then put Jacob back in his bassinette, half asleep and with a full belly.

As she rode the elevator to her apartment, she set the alarm on her cell phone to wake her up in an hour. Then it would be back to the hospital.

* * *

Three hours later, Ziva awoke to the sound of her washer and dryer running. And that was when she smelled it… the most wonderful smell of dinner wafting from the kitchen. Confused, she wiped the haziness from her eyes and went to check the bassinette.

For the second time today, Jake was gone.

She went into the living area and smiled. Jake was sitting in his infant carrier on the counter top, sleeping peacefully. Next to him was a small pile of baby clothes folding neatly and ready to be put away. And standing over the stove, was none other than Tony DiNozzo.

"Tony, what are you doing?" She asked.

He jumped. "Jeez Ziva, I thought we agreed that you weren't going to do that anymore."

Ziva shook her head and walked over to check Jacob. He was oblivious to any of the events going on around him.

"I hope I got him strapped into that contraption right. I'm glad he doesn't move around too much. I wouldn't want him to roll out."

Ziva checked the straps and pursed her lips. "Very good Tony. What smells so good?"

"Sirloin steak with portabella's and brown sauce, redskin garlic mashed potatoes and steamed vegetables."

"Tony, you did not have to do all of this!" She exclaimed.

"What, you have to eat to keep your strength up!"

"And Jacob's laundry?" She asked pointing to the pile of clean undershirts.

"I was bored watching the two of you sleep. I hope I washed them right. I used the baby detergent and no fabric softener. You said he was too little for baby wash so I figured…"

"You figured correctly. Very good." She glanced around the kitchen idly, suddenly looking a bit nervous.

"How much longer until dinner?" She asked.

"Just a few minutes." He answered watching her curiously.

She nodded and checked the clock. "Good. It will give us time to eat before it is time to nurse the baby."

He grinned as he watched her fiddle with the end of her T-shirt. Tony turned and spooned some sauce on their plates and walked to the already set table and placed their dishes down.

She smiled. "I feel like I slept for a year."

He smiled. "I hope you like it."

"I am sure I will. You are a good cook and just never told me."

He began cutting his steak. "My Mom taught me. She and I liked spending time together. My Dad hated that she was teaching me to cook."

"Well, I certainly appreciate it." She took a bite of her steak and smiled. "Oh my God, Tony, this is delicious!"

"I'm glad you like it." He allowed a few moments of silence to pass before ruining the mood. "I went to see Josh today."

Her head shot up and she eyed him curiously. "He is not doing well." She said softly.

"No, he's not. I told him about you and I spending time together, trying to figure out what this is between us. He's very proud of you."

She smiled. "He is a very dear friend. He wants me to be happy. He believes my happiness lies in your hands."

Tony took her free hand and held it as they continued to eat. "Ziva, I think my happiness lies in your hands." He confessed softly.

Her eyes glazed slightly but she held herself in check. "I want to be happy with you. Truly I do. There is just-"

"What?" He implored.

"Demons. Lots of demons. Once you know the truth, the whole truth… I just hope you will still feel it is worth it."

"Hey, not tonight. No heavy talk tonight. No tears. Let's just enjoy this evening."

She smiled. "Okay."

They finished their meal in silence, never once releasing their hold on each other's hand. Tony enjoyed the feel of their touch, almost like a form of silent communication. They reluctantly released their hold once they were finished eating.

They joked lightly while cleaning up the kitchen. Glancing at the clock again, Ziva realized it was time for Jake to nurse.

Her stomach felt like there was a lead balloon inflated in it. She almost chickened out before she even started.

'No Ziva, you HAVE to do this.' She told herself.

"I will- uh, be right back." She told Tony. He watched her leave the room worried about the frightened expression on her face. He continued to load the dishwasher and waited for her to return.

In her bedroom, Ziva stood staring at herself in the mirror. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed hold of her t-shirt and lifted it over her head, dropping it on the floor next to her. Now clad only in her nursing bra and sweatpants, she stopped to stare at herself again.

She then unhooked her nursing bra and allowed it to fall to the floor behind her. She ran her hands down her neck and breasts, then to rest on the scar on the side of her left breast. She paused there momentarily feeling her hands begin to shake.

She thought about the man standing in her kitchen. All that he had done for her, all that they had shared. She took another deep breath and grabbed her silk robe that was hanging on her closet door. She covered herself and tied the front of the robe before grabbing a scrunchie and putting her hair in a loose ponytail. Taking one more look in the mirror, she quickly exited the room and made her way back towards the kitchen.

Tony heard her enter back into the room and turned stopping dead in his tracks and almost dropping the serving spoon in his hand.

"Nice wardrobe change." He commented dryly.

She did not smile. Instead, she looked as if she was going to flee the apartment.

Tony tried to make her comfortable and continued what he was doing. He finished loading the dishwasher and closed the door pushing the button to start the machine.

She still stood silently in the doorway playing with the tie on her blue robe. Tony did not move towards her, instead he leaned her arms on the counter and waited.

"I… I want to share something with you." She announced suddenly.

He stood straight. "Okay. What do you need me to do?" He asked gently.

"Be the man that I know you are." She said quietly.

She moved in Tony's direction, pausing momentarily to check Jacob. She took Tony by the hand and lead him down the hallway and into her bedroom. She pointed towards the bed.

"Sit down, against the headboard." She commanded.

Tony was confused as hell but did as he was told. He kicked his shoes off and leaned back against the pillows, his back against the headboard.

Ziva spun and exited the room again leaving Tony utterly confused. She returned a moment later with Jacob in her arms.

Their eyes locked and Ziva immediately felt a sense of panic. 'No, no, push through.' She commander herself.

She came over to the bed and turned, sitting down and moving herself between Tony's legs. She positioned herself and the baby so she was leaning against Tony's chest, her head resting on his right shoulder.

She untied her robe but left it closed. "Use your left arm and bring it under the baby to support him." She whispered in a tiny voice.

Tony was entranced by what she was doing. He positioned himself and moved his arm under Jacob feeling the baby's weight now resting in his arm.

Ziva reached out with her right hand and took his free hand, holding it momentarily.

"You're shaking." He whispered to her.

"I know." She replied. She took another calming breath and moved Tony's right hand with hers. Using his hand, she pushed her robe open and exposed her left breast.

Jacob was close enough to her breast to feel the change from fabric to skin. He immediately turned his head towards her and opened his mouth. Ziva used Tony's hand to encompass the top of her breast and move her nipple towards Jacob.

Jacob immediately latched on and began to nurse. Ziva continued to hold Tony's hand over her breast and taught him to squeeze it gently until the baby began to nurse more thoroughly. She then let go of his hand and relaxed her head against his shoulder.

He couldn't speak.

He couldn't think.

The entire world had imploded around them and it was just the three of them left.

Tony was enthralled watching the baby nurse. He moved his right hand and laid it on Ziva's chest careful not to push her robe further open and exposing her more.

Ziva moved her head until her forehead was resting against his cheek. He continued to stare down at the nursing baby and then turned to her.

"This is so amazing." He whispered.

She smiled and he could feel her physically relax in his arms. Although Tony had dreamed of having Ziva like this in his arms on several occasions, he never thought it would be like this.

It was not sexual. But it was the most intimate thing he'd every shared with anyone in his life.

They watched Jacob for what felt like hours. Tony was sure time had stopped. Jacob suddenly stopped nursing and turned his eyes up and stared at both Tony and Ziva.

In his eyes was nothing but trust, love and adoration.

Both Tony and Ziva smiled down at him as he closed his eyes and began to drink again. Ziva glanced up at Tony and became choked up.

There was a lone tear rolling down his cheek.

She continued to stare as another tear joined the first.

He noticed her watching him and turned his head to look at him again. Their faces were millimeters apart and their faces drifted even closer together. Their nosed barely brushed each other when they pulled back slightly. Suddenly their lips came together as their shared their first true kiss.

It was gentle and left both of them craving more. She turned her attention down to Jacob again who was no longer nursing but laying with his eyes half open. She took Tony's pinky and gently used it to break Jacob's hold on her breast.

"Here, now hold him like this." She moved the baby in Tony's arms until she had him in the proper position to burp him. Taking his free hand, she showed him the motions to get the air from the baby's belly.

She watched Tony try and try to get the baby to burp, however nothing came up. "It is okay. They do not always burp." She explained to him.

She noticed Tony's stare and realized that she hadn't closed her robe. Blushing, she snatched it closed and tied it.

Jacob was more interested in sleeping. Ziva stood and pulled him from Tony's arms. As soon as she lifted him, he burped loud enough for both adults to hear. "There is it." She smiled.

Tony didn't move from the bed as Ziva put Jacob in his bassinette. She started to move away from him but he took hold of her arm and gently pulled her back.

"Show me." He implored her.

She looked at him strangely. "I saw the scar." He explained to her.

She dropped her head. "I thought maybe you had." she explained.

Looking into his eyes she felt his love. Even if he couldn't say those three words just yet, she saw it in his soul. She loosened the tie on her robe and stepped closer to him, allowing him to use both hands to push it open.

Although both her breasts were bared Tony's eyes were locked on one thing; the scar on the side of her left breast. He reached one finger out and gently traced the scar, knowing exactly what it was.

The scar from a bite.

He gently continued to trace it with one finger as if he had magical healing powers that could make it and all the horrible memories go away.

She reached up and took hold of both of his hands, lifting them to his mouth and kissing them.

"Where else?" He asked.

She turned and dropped her robe allowing it to catch at her elbows. Her back was now exposed to Tony and he could see several pink lines that marred her back.

"Did Saleem make these ones?" He asked softly.

She merely nodded. "He used a riding crop…"

Tony began to trace the lines with his finger again. "He got off too easy." He told her.

"Tony, please. Do not let hatred mar your soul. It is too beautiful for that." She whispered.

He sat closer to the edge of the bed and gently kissed one of her scars. He then reached up and took her robe, allowing it to slip off her arms and to the floor. She flinched but did not move away. Taking that as a good sign, Tony continued his ministrations. Time seemed to crawl as his lips gently traced every inch of every scar on her back.

Ziva wasn't sure she could stand on her own feet for much longer. Her knees began to feel weak. Not knowing what else to do she spun on him quickly and launched her lips against his.

They poured their entire beings into this kiss. He pulled her closer so he could run his hands through her hair pulling it from the scrunchie and allowing it to fall all around them. She scrambled into his lap and sat sideways, their lips only parting long enough for them to claim air.

She pulled back and looked into his eyes smiling. "This was not my intent when I brought you in here tonight." She teased him.

He smiled. "You show me yours, I'll show you mine."

Her eyebrows raised. "Really, well it seems as if I am the only one sitting here half naked."

"No really, look!" He raised his chin up and pointed to the small scar he has there.

She laughed. "Poor baby." Taking a page from his book, she gently traced the scar and then traced it a second time with her lips. She trailed kisses across his cheek and gently sucked on his earlobe.

"You're amazing." He said as she pulled back again. She used her hand to trace patterns on his cheek. His lips caught hers again. " I want you so much." He whispered.

She pulled back suddenly. Tony cursed himself. But then she smiled. "Yes, I can feel that." She said, smiling. "That is definitely not your knee."

He smiled. Leaning forward, he whispered in her ear. "It never was my knee."

She laughed. "I know." She then looked serious. "But Tony, I can't-"

"Oh God, Ziva I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

She put her finger on his lips silencing him. "You did not do anything wrong. I want to, but I cannot. Not until I get clearance from the doctor."

And then it dawned on him. "Oh jeez, I never even thought." She smiled and grabbed a quick kiss before climbing from his lap. She walked across the room and grabbed her bra and T-shirt off the floor and began putting them back on.

"I thought it was because of Somalia." He said sadly.

She stopped once her bra was on. "I am not sure how I will feel when the time comes. I have not tried to have sex with anyone since before Somalia. But, after tonight, I am confident that I can get through it, as long as you are patient."

He stood and walked over to her. He placed his hand on the side of her face and traced his thumb over her cheek. They shared one more smoldering kiss.

"Ziva, you," he gestured toward the bassinette, "-and him are worth the wait."

She smiled and took his hand leading him back towards the living room. "I want ice cream." She told him.

As she scooped out two bowls Tony's mind replayed what just happened in the bedroom. "Hey!" He exclaimed.

She jumped and looked at him like he'd lost his mind. "What?"

"You said 'I can't" in there!"

"Yes-"

"You used a contraction! I'm proud of you Ziva!" He exclaimed causing her to laugh.

She picked up a spoon of ice cream and fed it to him. "I do not know Tony. It looks like you are really beginning to rub off on me."

To be continued

**Okay Betherzz you gotta give me my brain wave back! I need all the help I can get. LOL**


	18. Chapter 18

**Well, I tried going to work today and my car broke down. =( An expense I most certainly did not need right now. Oh well, at least I have time to write a chapter or two!**

**Sorry about the confusion with the chapters and leading some people to believe the story had been updated. I tried to fix some typos that was driving me crazy in Chapter 1 and hinkyness ensued!**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 18**

The words being spoken at Tony quickly faded out. The only thing his brain could concentrate on was the sense of panic coursing through his veins.

"Agent DiNozzo, are you listening?" Director Vance's asked loudly noticing Tony's distraction.

"Uh, yeah. Why me?" He asked.

Vance glanced at Gibbs who was sitting at the conference table behind the two men. Gibbs held no expression on his face. He just watched the two men silently.

"What do you mean 'why you'? You are the senior most field agent on Gibbs' team. McGee is needed here to help in MTAC. That leaves you to go to Los Angeles and help with his operation."

Tony's stomach dropped. "How long?"

"Two weeks. Is there some reason you don't want this assignment?" Vance asked sharply.

Tony took a deep breath to say something but then stopped once he realized that Gibbs had suddenly appeared at his side. "No reason. He's going." Gibbs decided for everyone in the room.

Vance's eyes narrowed slightly at DiNozzo before turning to his desk and grabbing a red folder. "These are the details of the mission and your travel plans. Your flight leaves at 0715 day after tomorrow."

Tony didn't reply. He snatched the folder and began leaving the room, but not before glaring a Gibbs. The elder man took a drink of his coffee and was out the door and on Tony's heels before he had reached the staircase.

"Hey!" Gibbs called stopping Tony in his tracks.

Tony cringed inwardly before turning. "What the hell was that about?" Gibbs asked gesturing back towards the direction they came.

"Nothing. I just- I just don't want to leave yet."

"Why? There was a time when you wouldn't pass up a chance for an assignment like this. Beaches, hot women, bikinis…." Gibbs said.

"Before maybe. But it's different now."

"What is?" Gibbs prodded.

"Everything. Me. Jake-"

"Jake isn't your child Tony." Gibbs said softly.

Tony's face fell. His eyes were moving as if he was physically searching for the right words. Taking a deep breath he raised his head and looked Gibbs in the eyes.

"Yes he is." Tony argued loudly.

Gibbs eyebrows raised at Tony's outburst. "Is there something you and Ziva haven't told me?"

Tony shook his head. "No. I'm not his biological father. We all know that. But dammit Boss, that baby looks up at me with the most amazing expressions. His two little eyes contain more love and trust than you can ever imagine. He looks at me like I'm his Daddy. And dammit, that's what I'm going to be for him. He has no one else."

Gibbs smirked and stepped forward. "I **can** imagine Tony. I remember holding Kelly and seeing her look up at me like that. But Tony, have you thought about the other part of this equation?"

"What's that?"

"You and Ziva are happy playing house-"

"We're not exactly playing house, Boss." Tony corrected.

Gibbs waved him off, then placed his free hand on Tony's arm. "But what's going to happen to 'Happily Ever After' if Josh's cancer goes back into remission again? Have you and Ziva thought about that?"

The look on Tony's face was all the answer Gibbs needed. He patted Tony on the arm and descended down the staircase into the bullpen.

Tony stood plastered in his spot for a few moments. He hadn't really considered that to be an option. What would happen in that instance? Would Ziva pull away from him and again surround herself in a world that until a few days ago, Tony knew nothing about? Would she take Jacob with her? Would he still be part of Jake's life if that were to happen?

His stomach started to churn. He'd come too far with both Jake and Ziva to have it all go awry. What Ziva had shared with him the night before had left him with the most incredible feeling of love and trust he'd ever experienced. He wanted more. He wanted everything she was willing to give him.

He reflected back at the look Jake had given both him and Ziva while he was nursing. He looked at Tony like he was his Daddy. He couldn't just let that go.

He walked slowly down the steps and sat at his desk. He glanced at his cell phone and saw that Ziva had snapped a picture of Jake and sent it to him. He looked at the picture wistfully.

Gibbs knew he had stirred something deep within Tony by his question, but at the same time, he had to help DiNozzo save his career. He took pity on the younger agent. Sending McGee on an errand to Abby's lab, Gibbs went and sat on the edge of Tony's desk.

"I guess this is why Rule 12 exists, huh Boss?"

"Yeah." Gibbs looked thoughtful for a moment. "But at the same time, I've thought for a long time that you and Ziver would be the exception."

Tony's brows furrowed. "Why do you say that?"

Gibbs smirked. "Well, she is definitely defiant enough to prove me wrong. You are a good agent Tony. One of the best I've ever worked with. Ziva has turned into a top notch agent herself. But the two of you together… you're unbeatable. If the two of your are smart about it, you can make this work."

Tony allowed a moment for the older man's words to sink in. Gibbs stood and began to move back to his desk. "Besides, I know the two of you would love to prove me wrong." He added with a glint in his eye.

Gibbs sat at his desk and began shuffling through papers. He glanced back over at Tony who was staring at his hands. "DiNozzo, take the rest of the day and tomorrow off. I'll speak to you when you're in LA."

Tony's mind was still whirling. He stood and began grabbing his belongings. He started moving towards the elevator and then thought twice and moved to Gibbs desk instead.

"Ziva looks at you like a Father. You know that, right?" Tony asked him.

Gibbs nodded. "She's told me as much.

Tony swallowed. "Well, my Dad is in nowhere the same league as Eli, but he wasn't the greatest either. When I picture myself being a Father, I use you as my role model. I just wanted you to know that."

Tony spun on his heel as disappeared around the corner and into the elevator. He didn't turn to notice the large, proud smile on Gibbs' face.

To Be Continued


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for all the reviews again folks. I love hearing from you!**

**The T Rating will come into play a little bit with this chapter. Just for some language. Nothing too major.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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****"Just One More" Chapter 19**

Despite his earlier desire to be with Ziva and Jake, Tony had left NCIS and gone straight home. His earlier happiness and feeling that nothing was wrong in the world had been dashed by Gibbs simple question.

Honestly, he really didn't know where his and Ziva's relationship was going. He knew where he wanted it to go. His feelings for Ziva was something he'd wrestled with since the day he'd met her. Sure, there was an instant attraction there, lust if you will. But once he'd been able to spend time with her, just the two of them, he'd started falling hard. Once the sting of his doomed from the start relationship with Jeanne had dissipated, he realized exactly what had happened. He thought he had loved Jeanne. At least, what he thought was love. But he now knew he was in love with the fantasy he was building with her. He loved having someone to chat with on the phone when he was feeling down or upset about a case. He loved the idea of having someone home waiting for him after a long day at the office. He loved being able to just turn over in bed and be able to make love to that same someone, whenever the mood struck them.

Jeanne had pressured him to say that he loved her. He couldn't even say the words until Paula's death. How could he love Jeanne when she didn't even know HIM, the real Anthony DiNozzo? She was attracted to a lie, a fantasy. He would never know exactly how Jeanne would ever feel about him… the real him.

Sorting his thoughts and feelings out had taken time. Suddenly, one day it hit him like a ton of bricks. One thing Jeanne had done and he would be forever thankful for… she'd taught him that the capability to love was within him. And then there was Ziva, standing like a rock by his side. They slowly began closing that chasm between them that Jeanne had created, and then she had been ripped away and sent back to Israel.

He couldn't do it. He couldn't love her not knowing where she was day in and day out. He couldn't stand by not knowing who she was with… or what she was doing with that person. No, it was better for him to just let her go and push through the feelings he'd developed for her.

But he couldn't. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how many women he'd taken to bed, no matter how much alcohol he drank to burn her out of his soul… he couldn't. Jenny's death mixed with his realization of his feelings for Ziva, plus having her ripped from his life almost did him in.

Almost.

His friends from NCIS had helped pull him through whether they knew it or not. When he heard that Ziva was heading back to the United States, he thought he could handle it. He hadn't spoken to her for months, and though he stared at her pictures and fantasized about her, he was sure he could handle seeing her in person again, if he ever made it back to dry land.

And then he saw her. Live. In Person. Standing a few feet away from him with Gibbs.

'Oh shit' his mind screamed as his soul cried out in relief. His breath had actually hitched in his throat.

Shortly after he realized that she had started a relationship with someone in Israel. He tried to be happy for her. But that nagging feeling was still in his head. 'I should be you making her smile like that!'

He tried to fight it. He tried to pretend he didn't care. No matter what he did, or what he tried, or who he tried it with…he was jealous. And he was bound and determined that if Ziva had fallen for someone, that someone would be good to her, and make her happy.

Michael Rivkin wasn't that someone. That mess had led him to a plane leaving Israel without Ziva by his side. Then she had disappeared off the face of the Earth. No one heard from her, not even Abby and McGee. They soon found out why… Ziva David had died on the Damocles.

Of course, they now knew that was false information. However, what had happened to her in Somalia was worse than Tony had dared to imagine. They saved her. She was back in the United States, attempting to repair her relationships. And one thing Tony was elated about, she was becoming a US citizen and staying permanently. He wouldn't have to worry about losing her anymore. He wouldn't have to worry about Vance doing away with her position or Eli recalling her to Tel Aviv and putting someone else in her place. She was staying forever.

He gave her time to heal, both mentally and physically. He'd noticed how skinny she was when they'd rescued her. He'd noticed how she would sometimes flex her hands or legs as if to stretch out an ache. Sometimes, he'd catch her nursing her ribcage slightly, but the moment she'd catch his gaze she'd stop.

He knew. Dammit, he knew her better than anyone in the world.

He tried to act as if they were still the same people they were before Rivkin had come to Washington. He easily slipped back into his old pattern of one night stands, eating too much take out , goofing off at the office.

Ziva, however, did not. She'd changed. Tony noticed it. Oh sure, she had her moments of teasing, and of course, practical jokes. Every once in a while he'd see that dull, lifeless look return to her eyes, no matter how fleetingly. He do his damndest to protect her, no matter what.

Now, here he was at an impasse. He suddenly shook his head as if physically shaking himself out of his reverie. Jumping up from his sofa, he grabbed his keys and headed out the door.

* * *

Ziva sat in her favorite chair staring at her living room in a daze. She was exhausted. Jacob had been in a foul mood all day long. She was practically in tears while holding the wailing infant until she finally figured out what was upsetting him so much.

The tag on the back of his shirt was scratching him. She'd figured it out quite by accident. Not knowing what else to do to calm him, she thought maybe some skin to skin contact would help. All she did was take off his shirt and the crying stopped instantly. Jacob hiccupped for several minutes after and then was silent.

She'd gone in his wardrobe and found a shirt without a tag and put it on him before loosely wrapping the blanket around him again. "My God!" she swore.

Now, sitting in the living room with the baby nestled against her shoulder, she felt as if she was in shock. She couldn't help but feel like a failure. Shouldn't she have known what was wrong right from the start? What if she can't do this? What if she isn't strong enough to handle raising Jacob by herself? Tears began to sting her eyes again.

'Stop it Ziva!' she chastised herself. 'It's been a long day. You are tired.' She focused her wet gaze down on the baby nestled against her. All the pain, the tears, the missed sleep… he was worth all of it plus more.

She wiped her eyes and stood, taking the baby over to his bassinette. Making sure the blanket was covering him, she went into the kitchen and began heating up some leftovers from Tony's dinner the night before.

Tony. The mere thought of him made her smile. 'He has been so amazing the last few days.' She thought. Yet, she couldn't help but feel confused. Where was all of this going? She sighed and removed her plate from the microwave. She glanced at the baby and went back to her chair, sitting down and eating while reading the instructions for the contraption in front of her.

'Seems easy enough.' She decided. Finishing up her lunch, she put the dirty dishes in the pile she'd left on the table earlier and decided to give it a try.

She unbuttoned her shirt and brought the electric pump to her breast. After a couple of tries, she got the hang of it and was surprised at how easy it was to use. She closed her eyes and leaned back in the chair allowing the pump to do it's thing. Since Jake had spent most of the day crying and agitated, he hadn't really nursed and her breasts felt ready to burst.

She felt herself starting to doze off. Forcing her eyes open she lifted her head and realized that she'd managed to fill the first bottle.

She stopped the pump and removed it, attaching an empty bottle and restarted it on her other breast. The one she'd just finished with still felt engorged and ready to nurse the baby if he wouldn't take the bottle. She grinned remembering a joke Josh had made when her breast milk first came in. 'They may be little, but they're mighty!'

Glancing down again she smiled. 'Well, not so little anymore.' she thought. She leaned back and enjoyed the quiet as the machine continued its task. Satisfied at the amount in the second bottle, she detached the machine and took it over to the sink to wash it up. She placed one bottle in the refrigerator and followed the instructions on freezing the milk she'd collected in the second. Marking the bag she opened the freezer door and was immediately reminded that she hadn't even buttoned her shirt up.

"I'm a mess," She said out loud.

"Well, that's to be decided, but I rather enjoy the view." Came a deep voice from by the door.

She spun quickly causing her shirt flop open ever father. "Tony! Jesus, how did you get in here?"

He smiled and held up the key Josh had given him. "I didn't want to knock in case you or the baby was sleeping." He said with a smile.

She then realized that he was leering at her exposed chest. She narrowed her eyes and moved towards him slowly. "Enjoying the view Tony?" She asked unashamed.

He smiled goofily. "Yeah." He stood still as she continued to move towards him. Once she was almost to him she pulled her shirt closed. She reached up and touched his cheek.

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?" He whispered realizing that her lips were mere inches from his.

"I have had the worst day. I feel inadequate, tired, sloppy. Yet, within seconds, you can make me feel sexy."

He reached up and played with an errant curl that had broke free from her messy ponytail. "You should feel sexy. You are sexy. You always have been." He whispered as he moved his hand over to her cheek.

Their lips met gently at first. He leaned back and looked her in the eye. "It feels good to be able to do that." He confessed.

She smiled and pulled back slightly turning and fastening her nursing bra and buttoning her shirt. "It feels good to know that you **want** to do that." She said.

His eyes narrowed at her confession yet he didn't say anything at first. He walked over to the bassinette and gazed down at Jake. Just seeing the baby laying there asleep tugged at his heartstrings.

'He's so beautiful.' He thought.

Ziva's eyes narrowed at the lack of response from Tony but she didn't say anything. She moved to the living room and began straightening up some of the disaster she'd made earlier. "I hate to do it but I have to wake him and feed him. I have to keep him on his schedule."

Tony looked up at her and nodded. He dropped his gaze back down but didn't say anything. Ziva sighed and reached into the fridge, pulling out the bottle she'd placed in there earlier and putting it in the bottle warmer.

As she waited, she watched Tony stare at Jacob almost as if he was afraid the baby would disappear before his eyes. The warmer finished and she removed the bottle, testing it on her wrist before walking over to Tony. "Hey, I figured out how to use the breast pump today." She held the bottle out. "Do you want to feed him?"

Tony smiled slightly and nodded. He scooped Jake up waking him instantly. Angry at being woken, Jake immediately began to fuss. "Hold him up to your shoulder, let him wake up a little more. It'll give the milk a chance to cool a little." She explained.

Tony moved Jake against his shoulder which seemed to do nothing but anger the baby more. Tony took the bottle from her hand. Ziva turned to go over and get a nursing blanket to cover Tony's clothes. She grabbed it and turned and was surprised to see Tony had disappeared with the baby.

Confused she wandered down the hallway, finding Tony sitting in the rocking chair in the baby's room rocking Jake back and forth as he fussed against his shoulder.

"Tony?" She asked.

He didn't look at her. He murmured to Jake who stopped fussing a little and turned his head towards Tony. "Yeah, you don't like being disturbed when your napping. Neither do I little one. No-" He soothed.

He moved Jake down into the position he'd seen Ziva hold Jake in to nurse. Testing the milk in the bottle, it was warm but didn't feel too bad. Jake began fussing louder.

"Rub your finger near his mouth. It'll stimulate his impulse." Ziva instructed.

Tony did just that and Jake's mouth immediately opened. Tony slipped the nipple of the bottle in and grinned as Jake immediately starting drinking.

He stared down at the baby in wonder and watched as Jake's eyes blinked sleepily, yet his motion on the bottle never wavered. Ziva watched the scene in front of her in the same amount of wonder that Tony held in his eyes with Jake.

"You are a natural with him." She said quietly.

Tony did not look at her but did reply; "Yeah, but I'm not his father."

Ziva's brows furrowed. "Tony, is something wrong?"

Tony was silent for several moments before he replied. "I love him Ziva."

Her heart melted. She walked quietly across the room and sat on the ottoman in front of Tony and the baby. She moved her legs so that her knees were on either side of Tony's, touching them.

"I know you do Tony. I can see that. You do not need to tell me."

He shook his head. "No, you don't get it Ziva. I thought long and hard today. I can't keep doing this."

Ziva looked confused. "Doing what?"

"This. Bonding with your son when there's a chance you can rip him out of my life at any given moment."

Ziva looked appalled. "Tony, I would never do that to you."

He finally looked up at her. "What about Josh? What happens if Josh gets better? What happens if he gets released from the hospital and moves into that room across the hall. He's Jake's Daddy Ziva. Where does that leave me?"

Ziva's mouth moved but no words came out. Tony shook his head and looked back down at the baby. "I guess that is my answer."

Ziva placed both of her hands on Tony's knees. "No Tony. Do not do that. Do not answer for me. And do not attempt to shut me out. Not now. Not after all I have shared with you."

"But you don't have an answer for me?" He questioned.

"If a miracle happens, and Joshua is released from the hospital, then yes. He will move in across the hallway until Jake is a little older. Where does that leave you? You will be last face that I see when I sleep and the first that I see when I wake. Josh may be across the hall, but you are the man that I love. And I hope, that if that happens, you will be okay being a stepfather to him." She gestured towards the baby.

Tony looked at her tear stained eyes. "You love me?"

Tears fell down her cheeks. "Yes. I love you. I have for a long time. But Tony, please understand. I have to be more careful of my choices now. No one in the world is more important to me that Jacob. I have to make sure that he is my number one priority, no matter what."

"Ziva?"

"Yes Tony?"

"I love you too."

She smiled though her tears. She stood and leaned over the baby drawing his lips to hers. "I know you do." She whispered.

They smiled as the baby's hand came up between them. Tony squeezed Ziva's cheek before reaching a finger down allowing Jake to grab it. "Your son had a grip like a vice."

Ziva sat back down and slid closer to Tony. Reaching forward, she placed a hand on his chin and raised his eyes to hers. "Our son." She corrected him.

He smiled and removed the now empty bottle from Jake's mouth and moved him to a better position to burp him. "What does Josh have to say about that?"

Ziva leaned on Tony's knees and watched the baby. "This was one of the discussions Josh and I had when we first started discussing trying to have a baby. We came to the conclusion that we are both grown adults. And the day would come when we would fall in love and get married. Jake would be lucky to have four parents that love him, not just two. "

"You two really thought all of this out." He commented.

She nodded. "It was a big decision. It took me months of thinking before I decided to give it a try. And then there was the planning, the preparations, the medical appointments, the disappointments. It did not feel like it was every going to happen."

"And now here he is." Tony pointed out. Jake burped rather loudly causing him and Ziva to laugh.

"Oh yes, there he is." Ziva reached out and gently stroked Jacob's head. "You burp just like your Daddy."

Tony continued his ministrations with the baby as Ziva leaned forward and kissed him again. "I mean you, you know."

Tony smiled brightly. "You want him to call me Daddy?"

Ziva nodded. "If it is okay with you? Considering you and I do not have the best role models in our lives, I think it would be wonderful for Jake to have two wonderful men to call Daddy."

A rather large yawn from Jake indicated that he was ready to go back to sleep. Tony laid him back in his arms and stared down at him in wonder.

"What do you think Jake? Can you handle me being your Dad?"

Jake looked up at Tony with his innocent mocha eyes and reached his hand out. Tony reached his pointer finger out and let Jake take hold of it. Tears began stinging Tony's eyes.

"Yeah, I think he is okay with it." Ziva commented with a smile.

They continued to watch the baby until his eyes closed. Ziva moved back and stood. Tony kissed Jake goodnight and allowed Ziva to take him from his arms. She smiled down at her sleeping son as she moved him to the crib. "You are one lucky little boy, do you know that Jacob?" She whispered. Laying the baby down she turned on the baby monitor and leaned over the crib.

"You know what Jake? Mommy is very lucky too." She told the sleeping boy.

Tony watched the scene in front of him with a smile. Ziva kissed her fingers and put them on Jake's forehead. Grabbing the baby monitor, she walked over to Tony and took him by the hand.

"Come with me." She told him and lead him towards her bedroom.

To be continued


	20. Chapter 20

**This story is rated T for a reason. You have been warned.**

**One line in this chapter had to go out to Cote de Pablo. I was listening to the audio commentary she did for the episode "Recoil" and she literally made me spit Diet Coke all over myself. LOL**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 20

Tony allowed Ziva to lead him into her bedroom with a smile on his face.

"Uh Ziva, isn't this rushing a bit?" He asked.

She smirked and turned to face him leading him towards her bed. "What exactly do you think is going to happen here tonight Tony?" She asked.

He shrugged. "Well, I know what I'd LIKE to have happen but… I don't think we're ready for that yet."

Ziva looked surprised. "Tony DiNozzo turning down sex?"

He shook his head and placed one of his hands on her cheek. Ziva leaned into his touch.

"No. You and I would never have just sex. When the time is right, we're going to make love. There is a difference."

Ziva kissed the inside of his wrist. "Well, I am exhausted and need some sleep. I thought we could talk until I doze off, yes?"

He nodded. "Okay."

She moved to the other side of the bed and pulled the covers down. She slipped off her sweat pants leaving her top and boy shorts on. Tony's eyebrows raised.

"I got cold earlier and just threw the sweats on over top. I had my hands full with the baby." She explained as she climbed into bed. She pulled the blankets down and motioned to Tony to climb in with her.

He didn't need a second invitation. He climbed in next to her and laid on his left side facing Ziva who was laying on her back.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"Well, many things. But the first being… what is the difference?"

"The difference in what?" He asked confused.

"Sex and making love. What is the difference?" She asked innocently.

He thought for a moment before reaching out and taking her hand. "Sex is just that, sex. It's a physical act. A release. Sure it's enjoyable but it lacks the emotional bond, that connection which makes it even more special and enjoyable."

She looked thoughtful for a moment. "You have experienced this before?"

He sighed but wanted to be honest. "Yes."

"Jeanne?" She asked.

He nodded feeling a bit guilty.

She raised his hand that was holding hers and kissed it. "Well then. You will be my first."

Tony's brows furrowed. "You've never made love to someone?"

She shook her head. "No Tony. I've never been in love before. Every man I have ever been with had either been for a mission, or just a physical release. I can truly admit that I have never had an emotional bond strong enough with anyone to 'make love' to them."

"Really?"

She nodded. "All through my training, it was drilled into me that emotions are a weakness. Mossad preaches that it is like a family, but that could not be further from the truth. Everyone is out for themselves. I thought that was how I needed to be to survive. Coming here to the United States, it really shook me. Not just because of what happened with Ari. I watched you, Gibbs, McGee, Abby, and Ducky and I saw the interaction and the caring… I just wanted to be part of that. I learned that you can care about someone, and it does not make you weak. It makes you stronger. I just did not know how to be part of that family."

"But to have never been in love?" He asked genuinely curious.

She shrugged. "Who should I have fallen in love with Tony? A terrorist I seduced to gain information from, the gun runner that I lead on so I could assassinate him? How about the Hamas weapons expert that dabbled in child pornography on the side?"

Tony's stomach turned. "Okay, point taken. What about Lt. Sanders?"

Ziva thought for a moment. "I did not know him well enough to fall in love. I cared deeply for him, but love? No. We did not have the chance. Roy did teach me one thing though."

"What was that?"

"That it is okay to care about someone. And in that same vain, it would be okay to love and not lose any of who I am."

Tony scooted closer to her laying his head on her pillow. "So-" He started with a huge smile on his face."-you said you loved me."

She smiled. "So I did."

"Since when?" He asked almost like a child.

She thought for a long moment. "I probably really started to realize it when Gibbs quit and went to Mexico."

"Retired." He corrected in his best impression of Gibbs voice.

She smiled. "Retired. That private time we spent together, it became a bit much. My thought and feelings started getting jumbled."

"Is that why you pulled away so suddenly?"

She looked at him curiously. "We were spending time watching movies, playing piano, working on cases. Suddenly, you seemed to just pull away." He pointed out.

She looked down at their joined hands. "No. I pulled away because I found out my father was having me watched. When I was being framed by the Iranians, I went to the Israeli Embassy because I thought Mossad was running an operation and did not tell me. It was there that I was shown photos of the two of us at my door step on several different occasions. If those photos had been shown to my Father I was afraid of what he may do."

Tony raised his head up and looked at her. "You father had someone watching you?"

She nodded. "The head of the embassy thought I was sleeping with you to gain leverage. But father… he would have known. He could always read my expressions like I was an open book. He would have recalled me to Israel. I did not want that to happen."

"So you sacrificed a relationship with me to stay?"

Her expression changed. "I thought having a friendship with you would be better than not having anything with you at all."

Tony sighed. "I wish you had come to me and told me. We could have been more discreet. I wouldn't have gotten as involved in my mission with Jeanne if I'd known."

Ziva thought for a moment. "When I was in Somalia, I had a lot of time to think. And one thing I came to realize is… as painful as it was, Tony everything we have gone through, it has brought us to this place. You cannot look back on your relationship with Jeanne as a bad thing. You grew from that experience. And became a better man for it."

Tony suddenly became uncomfortable at the mention of Somalia. He decided to lighten the conversation a bit. "Yeah, and the sex wasn't bad either."

It backfired. At least he thought it did. Ziva suddenly looked very self conscious. "Does it bother you that I cannot-"

"What, jeez Ziva no! You just had a baby for god sake. I'm not an animal. I can wait until you're ready."

"The books say five or six weeks should be enough to allow my body to heal." She offered.

"See, and we're a week in already. Only five more to go."

She looked self conscious. "What if I am not able?"

He smiled. "Then we'll wait a little longer. Are you worried about your memories from Somalia?"

She nodded. He shook his head. "I'm not worried. You don't seem too self conscious around me."

She smiled. "The first time I went in for a gynecological exam before we started the In Vitro, the doctor touched me in a certain way and I freaked. I kicked her away and began to curl into a ball."

Tony thought for a minute. "Did Josh calm you down?"

She shook her head. "No, he was in the waiting room. I was not comfortable enough to have him in the room. The only time he was in the same room with me in that… way… was when Jacob was born. And there was a drape up. Of course, at that point, I did not care who saw what, I just wanted the baby in my arms."

Tony let go over her hand and slipped his hand under her shirt, parting the bottom of it until her belly was exposed. He rubbed his hand over it gently.

"I wish I was there." He admitted.

"I wish you were too." She replied.

Tony continued to rub her stomach until she pushed his hands away. "Tony do not do that. I still have not lost my baby weight and-" Her voice trailed off when his lips touched her bare stomach. He kissed it in several places before smiling up at her.

"You're gorgeous." He told her.

Her pupils were laden with desire. He kissed her a few more times before he turned his attention back to her face. "Next time, it'll be just me and you. And no matter what we have to do, it's going to me who gets to cut our babies umbilical cord. I want to be the proud Daddy staring down at the wet, gooey newborn in your arms." He whispered.

She grabbed him and pulled him to her capturing his lips with hers. They kissed feverishly until she needed to gasp for air. His kisses trailed across her cheek and jaw. As soon as his lips brushed against the sensitive spot behind her ear she arched slightly off the bed and into him.

"Are you okay?" He whispered to her.

She nodded vigorously. "Tell me when to stop." He instructed.

"Not yet." She instructed him with a mischievous smile. She then shook her head and laughed gently.

Tony smiled. "What?"

"I cannot believe I am here, like this. With you. All of the books I read said that most women do not want their partners to touch them for a long time after giving birth."

"And you?" He asked with a glint in his eyes.

She grabbed his shirt and pulled him almost on top of her. "I always want you to touch me Tony." She whispered.

They kissed again, her hands traveling down his back and over his shirt. He allowed her to pull it over his head and throw it to the floor. Tony's hand was still resting on her bared stomach, unsure of how far to push her.

She took her hand and guided his up her shirt to the buttons. He pulled back from her lips and watched her face carefully as he unbuttoned her shirt with one hand. They're eyes were locked and her gaze never faltered. He finished with the last button and stopped. She smiled.

"Your touch is nothing like theirs Tony. I trust you." She whispered.

Needing no further encouragement, he opened her shirt and undid her bra. Ziva pushed him away and sat up. Tony though he'd pushed too far until he watched her slide her shirt and bra to the floor.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down on top of her again. He rested a bit too much weight on her which caused her to flinch.

"Sorry." He apologized. She ignored him and captured his lips again. Laying at her side, he trailed kisses down her jaw and again noticed the scar on her breast. He kissed it gently as his hands slid up her abdomen to touch her.

"Careful. My breasts are sensitive." She warned.

His touch was so gentle that she barely felt it. She involuntarily thrust her chest towards him even further. Losing himself in her, his lips wrapped around her breast and he gently sucked.

Suddenly he jumped back and coughed, causing Ziva to burst into laughter. "What is wrong Tony? Did you forget that they are currently nurturing our son?" She asked.

"Damn. I just never thought I'd get a mouthful of milk." He replied causing her to laugh again.

"Sorry Tony. There is no button that I can push to turn the milk on and off. And today they are especially working overtime."

He smiled. "That's okay. I'll just be more prepared the next time."

She started pulling the blankets up to cover herself but he stopped her. "Does it hurt?"

"Breastfeeding? No. At first it was uncomfortable. That was before my milk came in." He looked at her oddly.

"When you first give birth, it takes a few days before milk comes in. The baby nurses on colostrum at first. It's thick and harder for the baby to get. However, it's gentler on their stomachs than the milk. Then the hormones kick in and the milk is there. Then it became much easier."

Tony gently touched her breasts and traced her nipples. "Amazing." He whispered idily.

She smiled and turned, reaching into her bedside stand. "Here, you can help me with this."

He took the tube from her hand and studied it. "It's a balm that stops my breasts from drying and cracking."

His face turned to a look of horror. She smiled again. "My milk is coming in more now. I started using the breast pump today so I can get some stored. I will have to stop breast feeding when I come back to work but I want him to have it for as long as he can."

Tony read the instructions on the tube and began to apply it. Ziva, enjoying the attention, placed her hands behind her head and relaxed as Tony continued his ministrations.

"I definitely do not want them to dry and crack." He stated simply causing her to laugh.

"Alright, what else?" He asked.

She looked at him strangely. "What do you mean 'what else'?"

"The horror stories. I know very little about childbirth Ziva. But I want to know everything. What else?"

She smiled. "Well, I had stitches."

"Stitches? Where?" Then he looked at her blanket covered pelvic region. "There? Oh God!"

She laughed. 'The baby was too big to fit, and the doctor didn't want my skin to tear."

Tony looked at her lecherously. "And do I need to put balm there too?"

She laughed. "No, but my lips are feeling a bit lonely." She pouted.

He quickly dropped the tube in his hand and catered to her wishes.

"Damn, leaving is going to be tough." He stated.

"Leaving? You do not have to go." She said quickly.

"No, Vance is sending me to Los Angeles day after tomorrow. We're running a joint op with them and he thinks it will be beneficial for me to be point man."

"How long?"

"Two weeks." He admitted.

She sighed and pulled the blankets up to her chin. "Well, the good news is… that will be two more weeks of waiting off the calendar." She said with a grin.

"Yeah, but it's also two weeks without seeing you. Two weeks without seeing Jake. Two weeks without administering your balm. I mean, what's going to happen?" He asked with a laugh.

"I guess I will just have to take things into my own hands." She pointed out.

He groaned. "Oh god Ziva, don't leave me with THAT image!" She laughed and stifled a yawn.

He kissed her forehead. "Sleep now precious."

She smiled at endearment. "You will stay?"

He nodded. She nestled into his shoulder and rested a leg across his and her arm on his chest. Tony thought she'd drifted off to sleep when she suddenly sat up.

"You were questioning me about Lt. Sanders earlier, why not Michael Locke?" She asked.

He frowned. "I didn't think we needed to talk about him. Not tonight. We've had enough raw emotion for one evening."

She nodded and settled back into his shoulder. "You know that Michael didn't care about me at all. He was suffering from his break up with his girlfriend. He was just looking to get laid." She pointed out bluntly.

Tony choked out a laugh. "And what were you looking for?"

"To forget, just for a little while. Michael was safe. He did not know anything about me, except that I worked for NCIS. It was easy to forget for a short time."

Tony smiled. "Short time huh?"

"Oh yeah, short time. He was not even all that good." She said smiling.

"You're just making this up."

"Perhaps." She said with a mischievous smile.

Tony watched her drift off to sleep with a huge grin on his face.

To be continued


	21. Chapter 21

**I can't express how much the reviews and story alerts mean to me. It spurs me on to work quicker because I know people are waiting. Although, I don't mean to make people cry!**

**And for those who are curious about Cote's quote I mentioned in the last chapter. During the audio commentary on the "Recoil" DVD, Cote did the commentary with the director of the episode. During the scene where Locke comes up to Ziva and basically tells her he wants to take her to bed, Cote piped up and said "If all men were that honest more of them would be getting laid." Or something to that effect. The gentleman doing the commentary with her cracked up laughing and then Cote starting giggling. Apparantely, Cote's co-workers are used to her saying things like that. For me, it was unexpected so when she said it I cracked up laughing with a mouthful of Diet Coke.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 21

Tony startled awake and looked around the room in confusion. It took him a few moments to realize where he was. Glancing down at the warm weight sleeping against him, he smiled. Ziva was still out like a light, sprawled half on him and half on her side of the bed. Her mouth was slightly open and her features relaxed.

He glanced at the clock on the bedside table. Tony was surprised to realize he'd slept for almost three hours. His arm was going numb from Ziva laying on it. He moved his hand up and began gently stroking her bare back under the blankets.

She stirred a bit but didn't wake. Her slight movement caused the blanket to slip down and expose her chest to him. Just six months ago this would have made him smile and probably pounce on whoever he happened to be sharing his bed with. But now, it was different. Everything was different.

He felt… honored. Ziva placed her faith and trust in him enough to be able to expose her body to him. Tony had heard stories from his buddies that after having a baby, their wives or girlfriends wouldn't even so much as allow their partners to hold them in bed, let alone sleep like this. Considering all that Ziva had been through, and the fact that Ziva had confided in him that her own doctor had caused her to panic at one point, Tony couldn't help but wonder what made him so different.

He heard noises coming from the baby monitor. Tony knew that Jake was on a particular schedule, however Ziva also said he hadn't nursed much today. He carefully slid his arm from under Ziva and removed her from his shoulder. He slipped from the bed and walked into the baby's room.

"Hey little guy. What's going on?" He said softly.

Jake's misty eyes locked on Tony's as soon as he leaned over the crib. Tony smiled and reached down, scooping him up and nestling him to his chest. "Ugh, eww. Okay, I think I know what the problem is."

Tony moved the baby to the changing table and laid him down. He reached for a diaper and wipes and pulled the tapes on Jake's diaper open. "Jeez kiddo, you weigh less than a bowling ball. How can you do all of this?"

He could've sworn he saw a glint come to the baby's eyes. Before Tony knew what was happening, Jake began to pee straight in the air soaking Tony's bare chest, stomach and the top of the jeans he was wearing. Jake also managed to soak his own tee shirt in the process.

"Arg!" Tony exclaimed loudly. He thought for sure it would have scared the baby however Jake continued to watch him amused.

"Okay, okay I get it. Big laugh on Daddy, huh?" Tony quickly folded the dirty diaper back down before grabbing several baby wipes and wiping himself off. Thanking the wardrobe gods that he'd decided to wear boxers today, he dropped his jeans on the floor while keeping a free hand on the baby.

"That takes care of me. Now for you." Tony made quick work of changing Jake's shirt and diaper. Satisfied that he'd done a good enough job, he scooped the baby up and brought him into Ziva's room.

He laid back in bed against the headboard and snuggled Jake to his bare chest. Jake's little hands curled into fists nestled against Tony's skin, his head turned to the side facing Ziva. Tony glanced down at her and noticed she was facing them, her eyes now wide open.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" He asked.

She smiled. "It is okay. He will need to nurse soon anyway." She said quietly. "Is everything okay?" She asked.

Tony smiled and stroked the baby gently. "Yeah, you just didn't tell me that you gave birth to a fire hose."

Ziva laughed and watched the sight in front of her. Jake was back to sleep already, his mouth moving as if he was nursing. Suddenly, he would smile and then begin sucking again. "Tony, look."

Tony bent his head down and watched the motions play over Jake's face. "Does he always do that?"

She smiled. "He just started it recently. I cannot wait to see his first true smile when he is awake."

Tony smiled. "I hope I get to see it too."

Ziva continued to watch them for several minutes before she shifted position and grimaced. "Are you okay?" Tony asked concerned.

She nodded. "Yes. I am just a little sore. My breasts are really full where he did not nurse much today. Sleeping without the support of the nursing bra was not a wise idea."

"Well, I rather enjoyed it." He joked causing her to smile.

"I bet you did. But after I nurse I will have to use the breast pump again. There is just too much for him right now." She said. She pulled the blanket back and grimaced. "My God, I swear they are even bigger!"

Tony smiled lecherously causing her to slap his leg. He laughed and focused his attention back on the baby. "I'm going to miss you guys." He said sadly.

"We will miss you too. How was it that you were able to get here so early today?" She questioned.

"Gibbs gave me the afternoon and tomorrow off to prepare for Los Angeles. I went home for a while to think before I came over."

"Were you really worried that I would take Jacob away from you?" She asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know what to think. Ziva this is all so new. Not just the baby, but our relationship as well. I don't want to screw this up. Yet at the same time, I don't want to try too hard which will cause me to screw this up. Does that make sense?"

She nodded. "It does. Tony, there is one thing I have come to realize about us."

"What's that?"

She thought for a moment. "We do not have to try. If we are true to who we are inside, and who we can be together, it will come naturally."

"Since when did you become so wise Ms. David?"

She shrugged. "A lot of therapy. After Somalia, I could not do it on my own. I did not want to burden Josh any further. So I was able to find a therapist who dealt with POWs and all that can happen to them while they were held captive. It was one of the hardest things I ever did. However, it helped me immensely."

Tony leaned down and kissed her on top of the head. "I'm glad. When we first got back to NCIS and Ducky whisked you away to Bethesda, I was so worried. I wanted to come see you but wasn't sure if you would have welcomed it or not."

Ziva thought for a moment. "I would not have." She saw Tony's face fall a bit so she rushed to continue. "It is not what you think Tony. It was not because of what happened between us, or between you and Michael. It was because I was not comfortable around anyone at that time. On the flight from Somalia to Germany, and then Germany to DC… anytime anyone got close to me I felt this sudden sense of panic. I feared that any man who got anywhere close to me was going to rape me, or beat me, or both. Standing on the elevator heading to the bullpen I had to fight off panic just being surrounded by you, McGee and Gibbs. I knew, deep down, that none of you would ever do anything like that to me. But that sense of panic was still there. It was hard to fight. If one of you had cleared your throat I may have started screaming in fear."

"I came to the hospital to see you. Well, they made me go and get checked because of the drug Saleem injected me with. I came to your room and peeked in. You were asleep. I didn't actually come into your room." He confessed.

"They sedated me. The doctor wanted my body to heal before concentrating on my mind. By the time they stopped giving me medication to make me sleep, Josh was there."

"I'm glad you had him to turn to." Tony acknowledged.

She nodded. "Me too. I did not think I could manage my life without him. But now… now I know that I will be just fine."

Ziva didn't have to say the words for him to know what she meant. He smiled and leaned down to catch her lips.

"I'm always going to make sure that both of you are 'just fine'." He promised. She smiled and kissed him again.

"I believe you Tony."

Tony moved Jake so that he was nestled between the two of them, but he could still reach Ziva's lips. "Do you want to know what I realized earlier today?"

She smiled. "What is that?" She asked touching his lips with her finger.

"That I will always fight to have you in my life. You came into my life and became a part of me. You'll always be part of me. My life will never be right if you're not part of it."

Tears immediately stung Ziva's eyes and ran slowly down her face. Tony immediately kissed her tears away before capturing her lips. "You will never have to try Tony. I promise you that." She whispered.

Jake was starting to stir between them. Ziva sat up and wiped her face before reaching for the baby. "Come here sweetheart." She moved the baby lengthwise in her arms and brought his face to hers. "Hello sweetie. Did you have a good time getting Daddy all wet?"

Jake's eyes opened as he turned his attention immediately to Ziva. "Yes, there you are." She kissed his forehead and nose and brought the baby tighter. She turned and looked at Tony silently telling him what she wanted.

Tony smiled and spread his legs allowing Ziva to shift between them and lay against his chest. She moved Jake slowly down her breast and allowed Tony to move it towards his mouth. The moment her nipple touched Jake he opened his mouth wide and latched on.

Tony, feeling more confident in his role, wrapped his free arm around Ziva and pulled her tighter to him. She leaned back as far into him as she could as she stroked the baby and talked to him. Jake would drink a little, stop for a short time and then drink some more.

Ziva smiled. "This is going to take a while." She told Tony quietly.

He returned her smile. "That's okay. I can stay like this forever."

She kissed him on the chin and turned her attention back to Jake. "You said that you do not have to work tomorrow?"

"Nope. I'm all yours tomorrow. "

She smiled. "Jake has his first appointment tomorrow with his pediatrician. Eden was going to drive us but…"

"No, no way. I'm there." Tony said immediately.

Ziva laughed gently. "I thought you would be."

Tony kissed the side of Ziva's head and then nuzzled her earlobe. Letting go of his hold on her, he reached down and began massaging Jake as he saw her doing.

They sat quietly allowing Jake to nurse. A sound from the living room startled Tony.

"What is that?" He asked.

Ziva placed her hand on Tony's. "It is probably Eden. She has a key and comes and goes. It is about time for her to get home from the hospital."

Within seconds, Tony heard footsteps coming down the hallway. Ziva pulled the blanket up to cover her free breast but did nothing to change their current position.

"Ziva?"

"We are in the bedroom." She answered.

Eden came through the door and immediately stopped in her tracks. "Well, hello there Tony."

He almost felt embarrassed, but at the same time, didn't really care that she'd walked in on them in such an intimate moment. He smiled. "Hi Eden."

"I was just checking in on you but I see everything is under control." She acknowledged grinning at Ziva.

Ziva peacefully nodded. "Everything is fine. He did not nurse well today so I think he is making up for it now."

"Do you still need me to take you to the doctor tomorrow?"

"No, Tony will take us. Thanks for offering though."

"Not a problem. To be honest, I really don't want to leave the hospital unless I have to."

Ziva sighed. "I spoke to Josh this morning. He said that he instructed the doctor to stop the treatment."

Eden nodded. "He's tired of feeling sick, and weak. He just wants to go peacefully without all the pain."

Ziva's face fell. "We will be right across the street tomorrow. Perhaps a visit will cheer him up?"

"Possibly. They have a lovely garden outside the hospital. If he is up for it, I can take him for a walk outside and meet you guys there."

Ziva nodded. "I will call when we are done at the pediatrician."

"Sounds like a plan." Eden walked over and touched Jake's head. "Night night baby."

She quickly began exiting the room but not before tossing over her should; "Have fun you two."

Tony and Ziva both smiled.

"This will be our first outing since Gibbs brought us home from the hospital." Ziva pointed out.

"I need to go home and pack for my trip too." Tony replied.

"Okay, so we will go to the check up, stop and visit Josh, then go to your apartment so you can pack."

"Shouldn't you be taking it easy?" He asked a bit worried.

"I feel fine Tony. My stitches are not very sore at all. I can rest at your apartment while you pack. I just…. I need to be out for a little while."

"Okay. It sounds like a plan." He acknowledged.

She smiled and looked down at the baby who was falling asleep. Ziva rubbed her finger along his cheek to wake him up. "Hear that little one? We are going visiting tomorrow." She told him.

Jake didn't seem to care one way or another.

"Are you staying tonight?" Ziva asked him.

Tony shrugged. "I can. I have a go bag in my trunk."

She nodded as if it was decided. "I need to take a sitz bath, and bath Jake, and get something to eat…."

"Whoah, whoah. Okay, I'm not quite sure what a sitz bath is and I don't think I want to know. I can bath Jake and get both of us something to eat."

Ziva smiled. "The bath does not take long Tony." She explained.

"No matter. I want to do as much as I can before I leave for LA. You need to rest. We have a big day in front of us tomorrow. Plus, didn't you say you wanted to pump milk?"

"Yes, there is that too." She was reminded.

She looked down at Jake who had finally finished nursing. Using her finger, she broke Jake's hold and began to move him to her shoulder.

"No, here, I'll do it. Go take your bath." Tony told her.

She smiled and handed Jake to him. She wrapped herself in her robe, grabbed her essentials and walked over to Tony, leaning over the bed and dropping a kiss on his forehead. With a smile, she disappeared into the bathroom.

Tony was happy that Jake readily complied with his attempt to burp him. He carried Jake into his bedroom and grabbed his bath basin. He went to the kitchen and ran luke warm water into it. It was then that he realized he was in a bit of a bind. How was he going to balance the baby and the basin at the same time.

"Uh, yeah…" He thought looking back and forth between the basin and the baby.

"Need a hand Tony?" He heard from behind.

He turned and smiled innocently. "How did you know?"

She smiled. "Because I have made the same mistake. Here, I will carry the water for you."

Tony followed her into Jake's bedroom and gently laid the sleepy baby on his changing table. With his arms now free, he placed one hand on Jake and used his free arm to sweep Ziva to him.

They kissed several times before she broke away and smiled, disappearing again into the bathroom. Tony could hear her moving around as he got busy with Jacob.

Ziva had exited the bathroom peeking her head in momentarily with a smile. She then left quietly and allowed Tony's time with Jacob. By the time the baby was dressed, he was asleep and not caring who was doing what to him.

Tony lifted him into his arms and brought his face close to him.

"Good night son." He whispered and he kissed his forehead.

Laying the baby down, he watched him for a moment before heading to the living room to find Ziva.

To be continued


	22. Chapter 22

**Thanks again for all of the reviews, story alerts, private messages, and just plain affection shown for this story. I hope my muse continues to live up to your expectations**

**I'm not happy with this chapter at all. It's just a fluffy filler piece to get me where I need to be. LOL**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 22

Tony walked down the hallway with a huge smile on his face. There was no particular reason for it, he was just happy.

Entering the living room, he found Ziva sitting on the couch messing with an odd looking contraption. "Is that the breast pump?" He asked.

She nodded smiling at his expression. "I felt the same way the first few times I looked at it. However, it is not as bad as it appears."

Tony sat next to her as she continued to put the pump together. "Would you be more comfortable in your chair?" He asked.

She shook her head. "No. I will be very comfortable in your arms though." She hinted causing Tony to smile again.

"How about we go into the bedroom, we'll have more space." He suggested.

She nodded and grabbed the bag holding the breast pump and it's supplies and followed him down the hallway. He joyfully bounced on to the bed and moved to his side, patting the bed beside him and waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Ziva chuckled and shook her head. "I wish Tony."

He faked a pout. "No, I wish!" He corrected and flipped over to his back. Ziva put the bag down and pulled out the equipment and set everything up. She assumed her favorite position of laying against Tony's chest. She opened her robe and placed the pump to her breast. Setting the speed, she let go and allowed the warmth of Tony's embrace to relax her. Laying her head back she closed her eyes.

The pump made Tony feel nervous, so he decided to concentrate fully on Ziva. He kissed her temple which brought a smile to her face. However, her eyes never opened.

"You look so beautiful." He whispered. She opened one eye and looked at him.

"You are just saying that-"

Tony cut her off. "No, I'm not. You've always been beautiful to me Ziva. But since you were pregnant, you've been breathtakingly stunning."

She closed her one open eye again but frowned a bit. "I do not feel beautiful. I am exhausted all the time. I feel like I still have all of my baby weight. I do not feel like I can fit into any of my old clothes."

Tony smiled. "Trust me. I know a beautiful woman when I see one."

She threw him a mock glare. "Yes. You do seem to have a sixth sense when there is a beautiful woman in a three mile vicinity."

He hooked his finger under her chin and brought her gaze to his. "Not anymore. My eyes are for you, and you only."

She smiled and kissed him softly. "Just remember that when you are in LA with all of those scantily clad women."

Tony shrugged. "Who needs scantily clad when I have this?" He asked, pulled open the other side of Ziva's robe.

Ziva barked out a laugh. "Oh yeah, Tony, this is real romantic."

He smiled. "You have no idea. This is my dream. A beautiful woman in my arms, baby in the next room. Cuddling together in bed, knowing that every morning I'm going to wake up to the love of my life and our children."

Ziva's eyebrow rose. "Children? Tony, unless you have not noticed, there is only one baby sleeping in that nursery. "

"For now. But later down the road, I intend to have this apartment filled with smiling kids."

"Filled? Are you planning on carrying them and giving birth because I do not think I have it in me to go through labor THAT many more times. "

"I would if I could. But I'll be there with you every step of the way."

Ziva was silent for a several moments before she reached into the bag and pulled out another part to the pump. She expertly put it together and began pumping milk from her other breast.

She leaned back into Tony's embrace again allowing her eyes to slip closed.

"If you are with me, I am sure I could handle it a few more times. But Tony, please do not dream too big. I may not be able to have anymore children at all. The odds of the in vitro working was slim. It was difficult, both physically and emotionally."

Tony nuzzled his cheek against hers. "Hey, one baby or ten, as long as we're together, it will be wonderful."

She was quiet for a time before sighing. "If I had not gone to Somalia-"

"Hey." He stopped her, using his finger to turn her face back to him. "There are no guarantees Ziva." Her brows furrowed.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"There are women out there who never went through what you did and still can't get pregnant the natural way. There isn't a reason for it, sometimes it just doesn't seem to want to happen." He explained.

She thought for a moment before smiling slightly. "How do you know so much about it?" She asked teasingly.

He shrugged. "It's amazing what you can find on Google."

"Well, I think I am done here for now. Perhaps we can heat up some leftover for dinner? I am starving."

Tony nodded and helped Ziva take the pump apart and get the milk bagged, marked and into the freezer. Ziva pulled their dinner from the microwave just as Tony had finished setting the table.

They chatted idily over their meal discussing their plans for tomorrow. Tony couldn't help but think to himself, 'This feels completely natural, like we've been doing it for years.'

Yet, in the back of his mind, he couldn't help but wonder what that nagging feeling was telling him that something was about to go completely wrong.

To Be Continued


	23. Chapter 23

**Well as I sit here in the Philadelphia area getting hit with a blizzard I have to wonder what our favorite duo would do… watch the DiNozzo Diknows Best marathon on USA Network perhaps? LOL**

**Thank you again for all of your reviews and alerts. On with the story we go!**

**This chapter is definitely a strong "T", maybe even a soft "M". Be forewarned!**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 23

Tony felt a bit of a knot in his stomach as he rode the elevator back up to Ziva's apartment. He had gone down to his car to grab his "go bag" from his trunk while Ziva prepared for bed. Heading back into her apartment building, he couldn't help but ponder the situation ahead of him.

He was getting ready to spend the night with Ziva. Not only spend the night with her… quite possibly in her bed although he wasn't sure of that yet. She'd mentioned a few days before that he was welcome to stay in her spare bedroom. Yet earlier they'd both slept in her bed.

'That was different though.' He thought. That was just a nap. This is spending the night. It was a completely different set of circumstances.

The elevator door opened depositing him on Ziva's floor. He went back in her apartment and set his bag down on the sofa. He heard Ziva in the Jacob's room. Heading down the hallway, he paused at the door.

"He's nursing again already?" He asked.

She nodded and smiled down at the baby nestled against her breast sucking greedily. "Every three hours, almost on the mark." She said quietly.

"No wonder you're so tired." He commented.

She nodded softly. "I have never felt so tired yet so happy at the same time." She rubbed the slight amount of dark colored hair on Jacob's head and then turned her smile to Tony. "You are part of that, you know?"

Tony walked over and dropped down next to the rocking chair Ziva was sitting in. "I hope I'm always going to be part of your happiness." He whispered.

She touched her forehead to his. "You will be." She whispered.

Kissing his cheek gently, she turned her attention back to the baby. "If you want to get ready for bed first go ahead. When I get him settled back into bed I will get ready."

Tony nodded and stood and began shuffling out of the room. Grabbing his bag from the living room, he went into the bathroom and began preparing for bed. Ziva knocked gently on the door several minutes later. He opened it with his mouth full of toothpaste causing her to laugh.

"I just wanted to ask you how many blankets you want on the bed?" She asked.

Inwardly he sighed. That means she's making up the spare bedroom. He put a finger up in the air telling her to wait while he rinsed his mouth out. "Uh, whatever is fine."

She leaned against the door and watched him quietly. "Well, were you warm earlier when we were sleeping? I usually get cold when I am sleeping. But I was okay with you under the covers with me."

"So… does this mean I'm sleeping in your bed?" He asked a bit unsure of himself.

Ziva smiled. "I think we have gone past the need for separate bedrooms, yes?"

His smile grew. "Yes. And I am almost finished in here."

"Okay. Jake is down for a couple of hours. So it should be quiet." She started walking back into her room and rummaging through her dresser.

Tony spat the mouthwash from his mouth and walked back into Ziva's room passing her as she went hurriedly into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

He glanced around the room and realized that they didn't have the baby monitor with them. He quickly went into Jacob's room and grabbed the monitor off of the base where it was charging. He glanced over the edge of the crib and watched Jake for a few moments.

The baby seemed to be having a dream about nursing which was making him extremely happy. His mouth was making a suckling motion and then he would suddenly stop and smile before the suckling motion would start again. Tony couldn't help but smile as he watched him.

"Sleep tight." He whispered to the baby before heading back into the master bedroom. He placed the monitor on the table on his side of the bed. He stripped down to his boxers and tucked himself under the covers leaving his tee shirt on. Normally, it would have been the first thing removed. But tonight he didn't want to push anything.

Earlier, he'd stripped it off after Jake had managed to get him. Ziva was fine with him shirtless, but Jake was also laying in bed with them then removing any pressure or panic Ziva may have felt.

He was laying on his back staring up at the ceiling, his arm thrown over his forehead. He stayed in that position for what seemed like forever when he heard the bathroom door open. His breath hitched in his throat when he turned his attention to the door.

Ziva was wearing a pale pink silk tank with matching shorts that barely came to the top of her thighs. Her hair was down and seemed even more curly than it did while she had it pulled up. Tony raised off the bed slightly and stared.

"Wow." He commented. Ziva seemed nervous as she began fiddling with the top. Tony held one arm out motioning her to come to him.

"What's wrong?" He asked as she came close to him.

She frowned. "This used to fit me better." She commented, noting that her breasts were barely covered and the top was riding up over her belly button.

He smiled. "Hey, look at me." He hooked a finger under her chin for emphasis. "You are the most beautiful woman in the world to me. I don't care if you're 120 pounds or 320 pounds.'

She smiled and reached out to take his hands in hers. "I know. But I wanted tonight to be perfect-" She trailed off.

Tony fiddled with her hands and waited. "Why?" He asked finally.

She shrugged and smiled clumsily. "It feels like tonight… is special."

Tony knew exactly what she was talking about but wanted to hear her thoughts. "How so?"

Ziva let go of his hands and bent down to kiss him tenderly. Touching his cheeks gently, she whispered. "It feels like tonight if the beginning of forever." She said quietly as she looked deep into his eyes.

Tony suddenly felt overcome with emotion. He felt his eyes begin to sting as he came forward and caught Ziva's lips with his own. They separated briefly allowing their foreheads to lay together again.

"You are so incredible." He whispered.

She smiled and pulled away from him. "You better think so." She said in a teasing tone and she went to the other side of the bed. "I spent a lot of time getting pretty for you." Tony pulled back the blankets and allowed Ziva to climb in.

"You don't have to spend time for me." He told her, reaching over to check the nursery monitor one more time. In all honesty, it allowed his the opportunity to move away from her a bit giving her plenty of room on her side of the bed. He turned back and began to settle into his pillows when she suddenly pressed against his side.

"Tony. You do not have to be so careful for my sake." She told him.

He smiled like a young child whose mother caught him with his hand in the cookie jar. "That obvious, huh?" He asked.

She smiled. "No. If I did not know you so well I would not have noticed. But this-" She pointed to the shirt he was wearing. "This, has to go." She suddenly pounced and began pulling his shirt above his head. Tony lifted his arms and allowed her to finish her task.

"Much better." She pronounced with a smile. Tony turned on his side and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tight as he began an assault on her lips.

She surprised him again when she used her weight to move Tony onto his back and move on top of him. Their lips separated when air became a necessity. However, Ziva's lips trailed across his cheek to his ear where she nipped and sucked causing all the muscles in his body to tighten.

Tony sat up and caught her lips again as his hands began to trail down her back. Then, as if he had a second thought, his hands instead tangled in her hair.

Ziva pulled away from him and sighed. "Tony. I am not a piece of china. I am not going to break." She pulled out of his embrace and slammed her head in her pillows for emphasis before turning her head to stare at him.

"I'm sorry. I just don't want to pressure you into something you're not ready for." He explained.

She smiled softly. "I know you are. But Tony, in case you have not noticed, I am as naked as I can possibly be and practically assaulting you in my bed. I do not feel pressure. At least… not in a bad way." She said seductively.

Tony got the hint and surrendered, knowing Ziva would correct him if he did something she was not ready for. "Correction, you are definitely not as naked as you can be."

She smiled and hooked her hands under his arms, drawing him closer to her. "Oh yes. Trust me. You do not want to witness the results of me laying here completely naked."

He kissed her quickly before settling his head in his hand. "Why? Because your breasts are leaking. That's not that big of a deal."

She laughed gently. "Oh, not just that."

Tony wouldn't get the hint to let it go. "What?"

"Tony-" She warned.

"No really. What?"

She glared at him before answering. "I still have some spotty bleeding and discharge."

Tony grimaced even though he attempted not to. "Okay, I shouldn't have asked."

She smiled. "I attempted to warn you."

"So you did. But, just so you know… I already knew that."

"You did?"

He nodded. "I told you. I've been reading on Google. The truth is… I just don't want to come on too strong. You told me some of what you went through in Somalia. I don't want to push you too hard."

It was Ziva's turn as her eyes began to sting. "I will be honest. I did not know how I would react when the time came for me to be… intimate with someone. Yet at the same time… Tony, I have already told you that your touch is nothing like theirs. You touch me out of love and desire, not anger and hatred. You want to share yourself with me, not break me. We cuddle together, you do not spit on me and let someone else 'take a turn'. Somalia happened, I cannot deny that, or forget that. But we cannot allow it to rule our lives forever."

Tony leaned forward and captured her lips with his. He allowed his hand to travel down her stomach and slip under her top as he began gently caressing her belly.

Ziva moved herself deeper into Tony's embrace by turning onto her side and hooking her left leg over Tony's.

Tony's lips trailed across Ziva's chin and towards her ear. Suddenly, he pulled back and smiled at her.

"Honey dust?"

She returned his smile. "You like it, yes?"

He shook his head. "You really don't forget anything, do you?"

She smiled and trailed her hands across Tony's cheek and chin. "Not the important things."

His lips found an extremely sensitive spot behind Ziva's ear which caused her to arch her body into him. He moved her onto her back as his lips followed the trail of honey dust she had left for him. It disappeared into the valley between her breasts which caused Tony to stop.

She smiled and grabbed her top, pulling it over her head and dropping it on to the floor. She began to reach for the front clasp of her bra but Tony caught her hands and shook his head. "No, let me." He whispered.

She settled back into the pillows allowing Tony to do as he pleased. His lips found their way into her belly button where he teased her until he heard her giggle.

"Ziva David, are you ticklish?" He asked with a glint in his eye.

Ziva suddenly froze, the expression on Tony's face and glint in his eye looking all too familiar. Tony caught the confused expression on her face and moved closer to her face.

"What's wrong?" He asked genuinely concerned.

She shook her head. "Nothing. It is silly." She suddenly looked very serious. "I did not tell you to stop." She admonished.

Tony smiled and reached forward, unhooking her bra and allowing it to fall open. He rested on his elbows and stared down at her causing Ziva to blush.

"Perfect." He whispered before catching her lips again and finding the trail he'd abandoned earlier. It stopped between her breasts Tony took the initiative and began trailing kisses across both of her breasts.

"As long as your are careful you will not get a mouthful of milk again." She promised him. Tony didn't need further prompting as he went in for the kill. His ministration caused Ziva to arch her chest further into his mouth as her hands tangled in his hair. Her breath was becoming heavy as Tony continued to lave attention to her already sensitive breasts.

"Jesus, Tony-" She whispered breathlessly before low moans began emanating from her throat. Her body's reactions to his ministrations fueled his desire for her even more. He trailed his lips down to her belly button once again while using his hand to gently begin massaging her breasts one at a time.

Ziva suddenly grabbed his hands and flipped them over, forcing him onto his back with his hands pinned above his head. She carefully began moving herself over Tony to straddle him but winced slightly, choosing to instead lay between his legs.

She gave the same attention to Tony that he had paid to her starting at this lips and forging a trail down his body. Tony's body was magnificent and reacting exactly how she wanted. She could feel him hardening to her touch which caused her to spur him on even further. She allowed her hands to trail down from his chest and slip under the waistband of his boxes, gently caressing him. Tony hissed as she moved her hands on him until he finally came to his senses and grabbed her hands pulling them out of his boxers.

"No-" He muttered causing a look of confusion to come across Ziva's face.

"Tony, I do not mind-" She began but stopped when he shook his head as he tried to calm himself down.

He used his hold on her hands to gently turn them back over, this time resting gently on top of Ziva. "I know. But I do. When it's the right time, we're going to do it right." He bent and kissed her gently on the lips. "I want to be buried deep inside of you. And when we lose control, it'll be together." He promised,

She smiled as she tousled a piece of hair on his temple. "Together." She promised. Tony rested his head on hers. "Are you okay?" She asked.

"Yeah. I'm just trying to settle down. You got me a little worked up there you little minx." He said causing her to smile even more.

Instead of her helping, she ground herself up and into Tony causing him to jump. "That is not helping!" He said with a cross between a groan and a laugh.

She suddenly looked very innocent, which was a stark contrast to her partial nudity. "I did not know I was suppose to be helping." She said simply.

"Oh, reeeaaalllyyy?" He asked and reached down and began tickling her where he now knew would cause a reaction.

"Tony!" She squealed and squirmed under him.

Tony was relentless and didn't respond. "Okay okay. I am sorry!" She panted between laughs.

"Promise?" He asked.

"Yes!" She stated. Tony lifted her hand and found her fingers crossed. "Ut oh, bad news for you…." He began to assault her again until she was breathless.

He finally stopped and let her catch her breath. She leaned up and caught his lips with hers before gently nibbling on his left earlobe. "Do you really never, ever want me to do that again?" She asked in a whisper.

Tony grinned. "Hell no!" He responded causing her to laugh again.

Ziva looked over at the nightstand and sighed. "We should try getting some sleep. We have a big day tomorrow and Jake will have me up during the night."

"There's milk in the fridge, right?" Tony asked. She nodded.

"Good. I'll do at least one of his feedings. I can catch up on my sleep on the way to Los Angeles."

She smiled and grabbed one more kiss before reaching next to the bed for her clothes. As she began putting her bra on, Tony looked at her lecherously. "Do you need help?"

She smiled. "Yes, actually I do." She reached into the nightstand and pulled her balm out and handed it to him. He smiled as she laid down and allowed Tony to apply the moisturizer to her. Once he was done, she sat up and hooked her bra, making sure the pads were in place.

"You do not want to wake up tomorrow with wet spots on you." She explained. Tony looked at her in confusion as she slipped her top back on and snuggled against his chest.

He smiled and tangled his hand in her hair. "I can definitely get used to this." He said softly realizing that Ziva was asleep that quick.

To Be Continued


	24. Chapter 24

**Okay, two feet of snow later and here is another chapter!**

**Thank you again for all of your reviews and alerts. I really wish I had more time to write than I do. Hopefully when I move in the next couple of months I'll have more free time. No more commuting 88 miles a day!**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 24

Tony dug his head farther into his pillows trying to ignore the nagging sound he heard.

"You've got to be kidding me." He murmured before flipping over onto his back.

He heard Ziva chuckle next to him. "What is the matter Tony? Has the appeal of getting up with Jacob worn off already?" She asked.

He sighed. "It was okay the first time… and the second. But this is the third time he's been up in six hours."

"Yes. But in all fairness, we did not go right to sleep when we could have. I have him on schedule to nurse every three hours. One time he woke up because he needed to be changed." She pointed out.

Ziva pushed back the blankets and started to get out of bed. "Go back to sleep. I will get him this time."

"Is it like this every night?" He asked.

She stopped walking and nodded. "Yes."

"You've been doing it all by yourself." He stated as if it had just occurred to him.

She smiled gently. "Yes. Millions of single mothers do this every night. I have gotten a lot of sleep tonight with your help." She said, stealing a quick kiss before going in to tend to the baby.

Instead of going back to sleep, Tony laid back on his pillows and listened to Ziva interact with Jacob. He smiled at her gentle tone, and how the mere sound of her voice caused Jacob's crankiness to melt away.

Ziva checked the babies diaper and sat down in the rocking chair. She barely had Jake to her bare breast when he latched on and quickly began suckling.

"My goodness. You are a hungry boy tonight." She smiled as Jake continued to nurse like it was the last time he'd ever eat in his life.

Ziva rocked him gently and laid her head onto the back of the chair. Using her free hand, she gently stroked the light smattering of hair on his head as she continued to talk to him.

"It is amazing how much our lives have changed in the last week or so, huh little man? When you were still in Mommy's belly, everything seemed so cut and dry. Having you was one of the best moments in my life. Always know that, no matter how bad things get in the coming months."

Ziva glanced down and saw that Jake was blinking his eyes, almost as if he was fighting to stay awake.

"You are one lucky little boy Jake. Not only does your Mommy love you more than anything, but you have two amazing Daddies in your life. Your first Daddy, Joshua. He has been one of your Mommy's best friends forever. He loved you before you were even born, and wanted to be the best Daddy in the world for you. But someone seems to have other plans for him. There is a good chance that you will not remember him at all when you are older. But Mommy, and Aunt Eden, will never let you forget him."

Jake's eyes had drifted closed but snapped open when she stopped speaking. She smiled and continued. "And then there is Tony."

In the bedroom, Tony's eyes snapped open and he reached over to grab the monitor off the bedside stand.

"It feels like to me that I have loved Tony forever, although I know that is not possible. Tony loves me too Jake. And you… you wrapped him around your little finger the moment he saw you. Your Mommy and Tony have made a lot of mistakes in the past."

She paused for a moment. "If Tony and I had made better choices in the past, things may be very different. He might actually be your real Daddy instead of-"

"It doesn't matter Ziva." His voice from the doorway startled her.

She turned her attention to him and smiled sadly. "You say that Tony-"

He walked across the room and squatted down next to her so that they were eye level. "I'm not just saying it Ziva. I'm TELLING you. I love that little boy like he was my own. He's your son. You are a part of me. That makes him part of me too. Who cares if our blood types don't match?"

She smiled and grabbed a quick kiss. "You are an amazing man Anthony DiNozzo." She told him quietly.

He smiled. "You better think so, because you're stuck with me forever." He pointed out to her.

She settled back into her rocking chair with a cryptic smile on her face. She closed her eyes for a moment before opening one and looking at Tony. "Forever. I think I can live with that." She said.

* * *

Tony was settled back into bed when Ziva came back in and cuddled against his chest. "You should be sleeping." She told him.

"I know. I just want to absorb as much as I can before I have to leave for Los Angeles."

"You tending to Jake earlier tonight and letting me sleep was wonderful. We will miss you when you are gone."

Tony sighed and began playing with her hair. He sighed loudly.

"I know." She soothed. "I do not want you to go either."

"Two weeks. I'm going to miss so much." He complained.

She smiled. "Tony, it is not like you will miss his first steps, first words, and first day of kindergarten."

"I know. I just… I don't want to be away from either of you."

"We will manage while you are gone. If I need anything, I have Eden, Gibbs or Ducky I can call upon."

Tony was quiet for a minute. "What about Abby?"

Ziva turned her face to him. "What about her?"

He sighed. "Abby and I were talking right after Jake was born. She feels like your friendship isn't what it used to be. She's not sure why."

She stared at him for several moments, her eyes a bit widened. Finally, she sighed.

"I had not realized… but she is probably right." She said. She stayed quiet for long time as she unconsciously played with his chest hair. Finally, she announced, "I will have to rectify that."

Tony smiled. "I'm sure Abby would appreciate that."

Ziva smiled. "Me too. However, we do have an appointment at 8:45 am tomorrow. We need sleep now."

Tony grabbed several kisses from her before turning off the bedside lamp and pulling her even tighter.

* * *

Barely an hour later, Tony was awoken by Ziva as she jumped in her spot next to him. At some point during their sleep, she had turned onto her left side causing Tony to spoon up behind her.

She was now caught in the remnants of what had to be a nightmare. Her breathing was irregular and her body was moving uncontrollably.

Tony attempted to wake her gently. "Ziva-" He rubbed her arm attempting to wake her.

"No, no- please not him!" She yelled grabbing his arm and throwing it off of her and she shrunk away from him.

"Ziva, wake up honey. Come on." He reached out and took her arms which caused her to blink several times as if she just realized where she was.

"Tony? Oh god-" She pulled her knees up to her chest and dropped her head onto them. "I am sorry." She apologized.

He shook his head. "Don't apologize. It was a dream." He reached out and smoothed an errant strand of hair back. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." She said quickly. She raised her head up slightly and looked at Tony. She ran her hand through her hair pushing it back. "I am sorry."

Tony looked a bit hurt but understood. "Okay, but I'm here to listen."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him back down against her. She snuggled against his chest again but seemed to think twice about it. She turned onto her left side and pulled him against her.

"I- I think it is the way we were sleeping." She started.

"What, you mean like this?" He asked.

She nodded slightly. "The first time I was…." she took a deep breath. "The first time I was raped they held me face down-" She struggled with her words.

Tony held on to her tighter. "They raped you from behind, so having me hold you like this brought back the memory." He explained.

She sighed. "It brought back memories." She verified. "But that was not the dream. I had the same dream over and over from the moment I found out I was pregnant. That it was all just a trick that Saleem pulled. I could see myself in my cell holding my baby boy in my arms when Saleem would come in and take him. Sometimes he would kill him in front of me. Other times, he would take him out of my cell. I could hear his cries getting father and father away and suddenly it would just stop. Saleem would then return with his bloodied blanket and hold it in my face."

"Jesus Ziva. I'm so sorry." He apologized.

"I have not had the dream in a while. All of this talking about Somalia must have stirred it up in my unconscious."

Tony pulled away from Ziva and moved onto his back. She turned her head and looked at him as he held his arms out.

"Come here." He said motioning for her to move against his chest.

Instead, she shook her head. "No, you come here." She said, placing her hand on Tony's hip and pulling him back up against her. Instead of keeping her distance, she snuggled tighter into his embrace.

She took his right hand in hers pulling his arm completely around her. She kissed it gently before allowing their clasped hands to rest on the mattress.

* * *

Tony could have sworn he'd just fallen asleep when the alarm clock began beeping. He cringed at the sound but forced his eyes open. He smiled when the first sight he saw was a sleepy pair of dark brown orbs staring back.

"Good morning." He whispered.

She smiled. "That it is. I could stay like this all day." She murmured.

"Me too. But we have a certain little boy who has an important appointment today." He reminded her.

She nodded. "Yes. And I am looking forward to seeing Josh too." She pointed out.

He nodded and stole a long kiss from her. "Mmm. What do you want for breakfast?" He asked.

She thought for a minute. "Cereal. I still have to nurse Jake and pack his diaper bag. We have to get ready. Plus we have never taken him out before. It may be a bit challenging at first." She pointed out.

"Okay, cereal it is!" He announced hopping out of bed and holding his hands out to her. She took them with a smile and allowed him to pull her up. She fell against his chest and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Oh you flirt. You set me up." He told her with a smile.

She threw an innocent yet flirtatious look at him. "Yes, yet another conspiracy on my part to get me into your arms."

He smiled wider. "You don't even have to ask me." He replied capturing her lips with his.

They stayed like that for several moments before Ziva suddenly pulled away. "Okay, I have to pack Jake's diaper bag. You, go pick out what cereal you want."

Ziva glanced at Jake's diaper bag and was sure she had over packed. Yet at the same time, she wanted to be sure.

Placing the diaper bag next to the waiting car seat, she and Tony ate breakfast in record time. He went to get ready while she nursed the baby. Once he was fed and burped, they switched places, Tony getting him changed and dressed while Ziva took her turn getting dressed for the day.

Tony was standing in the living room holding Jake when she came in. She looked around, running through a mental checklist with the diaper bag. Positive she had everything she turned to Tony. "I think we are ready." She announced.

"Good, because for such a little guy, he has an awful lot of stuff to carry around."

She threw him a withering smile. "I just want to be thorough. But can we get out of here? I am tired of being cooped up in my apartment."

Taking Jake from Tony's arms, she checked his blanket and strapped him into the car seat, pulling the carrying handle up. She reached into his bag and pulled out one more blanket, laying it over top of Jake to ensure he was warm in the bright April sunshine.

"We can take my car. The car seat base is already installed." She explained, handing Tony her keys.

Tony picked the sleeping baby up and handed his bag to Ziva. "I'll take him. You take the suitcase." He told her.

She smiled and put the bag over her shoulder. Locking the apartment door behind them, Tony couldn't help but smile as people passed them in the hallway and paid special attention to Jake.

Tony liked the extra attention much more than the baby did.

Entering the parking lot, he glanced around looking for Ziva's Mini Cooper. It had taken her some time, but once she returned from Somalia she had to replace everything she had, including her car which apparently belonged to the Israeli Embassy. She'd replaced her red Mini with a blue one. However now, Tony didn't see it at all.

He turned to ask Ziva and was surprised to see her standing next to a black SUV. She looked at him expectantly.

"A Ford Escape?" He asked her.

She nodded. "I could not keep my car with the baby on the way. I was having trouble getting in and out of the driver's seat. Let alone everything I would have to carry, plus the car seat. It just was not feasible for me anymore."

He nodded. "Nice." Using the remote in his hand, he unlocked the doors and handed Jake to Ziva. He rushed to the driver's side back door and opened it so he could watch how Ziva strapped the car seat in. Satisfied that Jake was secure, she closed the back door and waited for Tony to do the same.

Tony quickly hopped into the driver's seat and watched as Ziva gingerly climbed into the passenger side. "You okay?" He asked.

She nodded. "I just have to remember that I am not completely healed." She answered.

"Alright my lady. Where to?"

"Just head towards the hospital. Dr. Henderson's office is right across the street." She said.

Tony nodded and started the engine. "Alright Jake, time to wow your pediatrician!" Tony announced before backing out of their parking spot and heading for the main road.

To Be Continued


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 25

Ziva guided Tony into a large office complex across the street from the hospital. Glancing at the sign in front, he had to smile.

"Dr. John Henderson and Dr. Amie Henderson? Husband and wife?" He asked as he pulled into a parking spot.

Ziva smiled and nodded, unbuckling her seatbelt and closing her eyes, allowing the sunshine to warm her face.

"One is a pediatrician, the other an OB/GYN." She explained.

Tony glanced at the office and then back at Ziva. "Well, I certainly hope that the wife if the OB/GYN. I don't know if I could handle it being a wife whose husband did THAT for a living." He said jokingly causing Ziva to chuckle.

"He is actually the pediatrician. Amie is the OB/GYN, however she focuses her practice mostly on infertile couples." Ziva said softly.

Tony looked impressed. "Were you referred here by the fertility clinic you and Josh used?" He asked, genuinely interested.

Ziva suddenly looked a bit troubled. She focused on her hands that were clasped in her lap. Taking a bit of a deep breath, she turned to Tony.

"Amie isn't just a fertility specialists. She first tended to me after Somalia, when I was admitted to Bethesda."

She paused allowing Tony a moment to absorb her words.

"So she-" He didn't finish his thought.

Ziva nodded. "She also accepts cases of rape and abuse victims. She was raped by two men back when she was in college. Instead of allowing it to ruin her life, she made good things out of it. She speaks very openly. She gets called in by local hospitals for rape and abuse victims. She also runs support groups here at the office."

"Wow." Tony commented.

Ziva nodded. "I barely remembered her after I was discharged from Bethesda. I saw her name on my paperwork when my mind was able to handle it. After I returned to NCIS, I began having some… difficulties. Paperwork for her support group was in my discharge papers. I began attending the sessions off and on. The more I went, the stronger and more in control of myself I felt. They helped tremendously."

Tony watched her with interest. "You mentioned therapy, I thought you meant with a trained therapist."

Ziva shook her head. "I do not think I could have done that. At least not then. But sitting with other women, listening to their stories, made me know that I was not alone." She paused. "And then of course, Jake-"

"She performed the in vitro?" He asked.

She nodded. "Josh looked around for doctors that he thought I would be comfortable with. Amie's name is the one that kept coming up. He did not know that I had been attending support groups here at the clinic. He still does not know."

"You never told anyone?" He asked.

"Not until now. It was my burden to bare. No one else's."

"Ziva-" He began but she shook her head stopping him.

"Amie did not think that I would be able to get pregnant. She believed that if I did, carrying the child would not be a problem. But the actual getting pregnant would be the issue."

"Josh mentioned that it took three tries." He pointed out.

She smiled and nodded.

"We agreed to try three times. The first time did not take at all. It almost killed me when the tests came back negative. The second try took, but I miscarried the same day the tests came back positive. Our third try gave me Jake." She said smiling sadly.

"Well, we better head inside." Tony pointed out glancing at the clock on the dashboard.

Ziva opened the passenger side door and slipped tenderly to the ground. Opening the back door, she smiled at Jake who slept the entire way. She unhooked his car seat and raised the carrying handle, gently lifting him out and handling him to Tony. Grabbing the diaper bag, she slung it over her shoulder and closed the door.

They walked hand and hand into the office only to her greeting by a brightly smiling receptionist at the main desk.

"Ziva!" She sound brightly.

Ziva smiled. "Hello Angela."

"Oh Sharon, look who's here!" She jumped from her seat and waggled her fingers. "Let's see him."

Ziva smiled and nodded to Tony who raised Jake's carrier up and placed it on the desk to allow the two girls to gush over him.

"Ziva, he's beautiful! You've got to make sure Amie gets a picture of him for her wall."

Ziva nodded. "I will bring one when I have my appointment with her." She promised.

Angela smiled down at Jake again and then turned her smile to Ziva. "I bet it feels good to be going to the other side of the waiting room, huh?" She said handing Ziva a clipboard with numerous papers attached.

She nodded and glanced at the paperwork. "Angela, this is Tony. He is my boyfriend and will be our emergency contact in case I am unreachable."

Angela nodded. "Splendid. The back of the first page asks for contact information. Just put it all on there and it will be in our files."

"Did the hospital forward over Jake's records?" Ziva asked.

Angela nodded. "Everything is right here." She indicated a manila folder with Jake's name typed on the label.

"Thanks Angela."

"No problem. Stop by when you're done with John and I'll give you an appointment for your follow up with Amie."

Ziva nodded and smiled as they began to move into the waiting room on the left side of the building.

"Wow, she was… really happy." Tony commented causing Ziva to chuckle.

"She is always like that." She replied settling into a pair of chairs indicating the extra one for Tony. He sat and placed Jake's carrier on the table in front of them.

Ziva pulled out her insurance card and began working on the paperwork. Tony noted that she paused for a moment over the Father's information box. He smiled outwardly when the hesitation only lasted a moment, Ziva quickly scribbling Tony's information in the box.

Tony watched Jake sleep and Ziva continue with the paperwork as he glanced around the office bored. He glanced at his watch, sure they'd been waiting for a while.

"It has only been five minutes Tony." Ziva chastised, not bothering to look up.

He crossed his arms almost in a pout and stretched his legs out.

Ziva rolled her eyes at him and stood, taking the clipboard back to Angela.

Angela made a copy of her insurance card and took her co-pay sending Ziva back to relax.

She'd barely returned when a nurse popped out of a door on the side.

"Jacob David?" She asked.

Tony started and grabbed the baby carrier quickly causing Jake to stir a bit. "Are you in a hurry Tony?" Ziva asked.

"No, just… doctors make me nervous." He explained.

Ziva's brow furrowed but she said nothing following the nurse into an exam room.

"Hi, my name is Julia." She introduced herself, reaching out and shaking both Ziva and Tony's hand.

Tony had placed the carrier on the exam table. Julia reached forward taking the top blanket off of Jake. "And you, little sleepy boy must be Jacob. Come here, let's get you out of this thing."

She unstrapped the baby and lifted him expertly out of the carrier. "Any problems that you'd like to talk to the doctor about?" She asked.

Ziva shook her head. "No, everything seems as it should be." She explained.

Julia nodded and scribbled something on Jake's chart. "Here baby. Let's get this blanket off of you so we can get you on the scale."

Jake was not happy to have the warmth of the blanket removed. He began to fidget in Julia's arms as she moved him to the scale. "There, there little one. I promise I'll make this quick."

She laid him on the scale and watched it register his weight. As soon as she made a note of it, she brought the baby back up into her arms and wrapped his blanket back around him.

Moving back to the exam table, she laid Jake down and scribbled his weight into the chart. Glancing at his hospital records, her eyebrows raised and she smiled.

"Mommy, want to keep a hand on him. I have to take his temperature." Julia explained.

Ziva cringed and nodded. Tony watched as Julia pulled out a thermometer and cleaned the tip with an alcohol swab. Moving back to Jake, she unwrapped him again and undid his diaper.

"Uh, where-" Tony began and cringed when he saw where the thermometer went.

Julia smiled and watched Jake who was definitely awake now. He seemed ready to cry but Ziva began talking to him putting all of his attention on her.

Before they knew it, the thermometer beeped. Julia warned Ziva. "Okay, step back."

Ziva nodded. "I already learned my lesson."

Tony grimaced when Julia removed the device and Jake immediately went to the bathroom.

"Ugh-" Tony couldn't help but comment.

Julia laughed and quickly moved Jake's diaper to cover him, not doing up the tabs. "That's actually a good thing. It shows that his bowels are working well." She explained.

Just then a man with salt and pepper hair, a long lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck came into the room.

"Ziva, it's good to finally meet you. I'm John Henderson." He said holding his hand out.

"It is good to meet you too. This is Tony." She introduced.

"Hi Tony. And of course, this is Jacob. How are you today little man?" He asked moving to the side of the table Julia was standing on. She handed the chart to the doctor as Ziva reached into the diaper bag and pulled a clean diaper and wipes out.

"Well, I see I don't need to ask about his bowel movements." He laughed. Jake's eyes were open and he was staring at the doctor with interest. "Don't feel bad Jake, it happens all the time." He said causing the adults in the room to smile.

He reached forward and took the items from Ziva. "Here Mom, I'll take care of that."

Ziva seemed a little surprised but surrendered the items willingly. He made quick work of cleaning the baby up.

Tony noted the doctor examining the baby's penis closely. "It looks as if his circumcision wound is healing quite nicely. Any problems with urinary retention, swelling?"

Ziva shook her head. "No. I could tell he was in pain for a couple of days. But it did not stop him from eating or sleeping." She explained.

The doctor smiled. "That's great. I'd wait a few more days before using the baby wipes on the exposed area. He will have a scar. That is perfectly normal. But he seems to have come through the worst of it with flying colors."

Dr. Henderson did up the tapes of the babies diaper an moved the blanket up over his legs. He used an edge of Jake's blanket to wrap the stethoscope in. He reached for Jake's chart and glanced at it for several moments.

"He lost a few ounces from the time he was born until he was discharged from the hospital."

Tony immediately began to worry and frowned. Ziva caught his expression and took his hand. "The pediatrician at the hospital told me that was normal."

"Oh it is. He lived in a liquid environment for nine months. When they're born their body begins to shed that water weight. Jake didn't lose that much weight." He glanced at the chart again. "And I see that he's already put it back on plus some."

Jake suddenly turned his attention to his parents and looked amused. Tony smiled and reached down to touch his arm. "That's Daddy's little porker." He encouraged.

Dr. Henderson smiled. While Jake's attention was turned, he snapped his fingers next to his right ear causing Jake to immediately turn his attention back to the doctor. He did the same with his left side causing Jake's expression to change to one of annoyance.

"Well, his hearing is fine." He said laughing.

He unwrapped the stethoscope from the blanket and cleaned the end with an alcohol swab. He listened to Jake's heart and lungs. Tony realized he had used the blanket to warm the instrument up.

"Sounds great. Now, let's take a look at this-" He said gently, examining Jake's umbilical cord stump. He motioned to Tony and Ziva to step closer. "This is starting to come off on it's own. No matter what you do, don't pull it off. Even if it's hanging by a thread. It'll come off eventually. He may have a bit of a sore there, maybe a scab. Just watch it closely for infection. But it should only be a few more days."

Tony and Ziva both nodded. Tony grimaced inwardly realizing he wouldn't be there when the cord did come off.

The doctor wrapped Jake back in his blanket and using a small light, examined his eyes and ears. He removed his cap and examined his head.

He scribbled several notes into Jake's chart and smiled. "Well, what can I say. You have a perfect child."

Ziva let out a breath she didn't know she was holding and smiled. Tony squeezed her hand in his.

"He damn well better be perfect." Came an unfamiliar voice from the doorway.

They both turned and Ziva broke into a huge smile. "Amie!" She exclaimed.

A tall woman with long, wavy coppery hair and blue eyes came breezing into the room. "Sorry John, but I saw your name at the receptionists desk and I had to come take a look."

Tony was surprised when Ziva enveloped the other woman in her arms. "How is everything going?" She asked.

"Well, I was just telling Ziva that her son is absolutely perfect." John explained.

Amie shrugged. "I didn't expect anything less." She said leaning over the table and looking at Jake.

"Hey there little man. Look at how much you've grown since I last saw you!" She told Jake running a finger down his belly.

Jake was amused again, enjoying all the attention he was receiving.

Amie's blue eyes locked on Tony. "I'm Amie Henderson." She held her hand out.

Tony took her hand and shook it firmly, deciding that he liked these two people a lot.

"Tony DiNozzo." He introduced.

Amie nodded once and looked at Ziva with her eyebrows raised a bit and a smirk on her face. She moved over to stand next to her husband.

"Sorry honey, I didn't mean to interrupt. I just had to come see this miracle baby for myself."

Ziva smiled and reached forward and took one of Amie's hands. "He really is a miracle." Ziva agreed.

Amie placed a reassuring hand on John's arm and explained. "When Ziva first came to me to begin the in vitro procedures, I told her that there was little chance it would work. She decided to challenge me and prove me wrong." Amie glanced down at Jake who was still watching with interest. "I've never been so happy to be wrong in my life."

John laughed. "I should have recorded that to use in our next argument."

Amie laughed. "Oh, don't worry. When you and I argue I'm never wrong."

Tony and Ziva laughed. John put Jake's cap back on his head and smiled. "Just keep doing what you're doing. He's thriving in your care so you must be doing something right." He reassured.

The sound of a young child crying from the next exam room broke his happy smile. "And with that, I must go. I'll get Angela to set up Jake's next exam. Call if there are any problems at all, day or night. I know you have Amie's cell phone number, so feel free to use it if you need me as well."

Ziva smiled. "Thank you so much."

John looked at Amie. "No patients this morning?" He asked.

She shook her head and laughed. "My 9:00 was the baby I delivered last night." She explained.

He shook his head. "Alright, I'll see you at lunch." He kissed the side of her head, waved to Tony and Ziva and left the room.

"I'll take his chart out and have Angela get you set for your next appointment." Julia explained, smiling at Amie and leaving the room.

Tony lifted the baby from the exam table and began strapping him back into his carrier. "See buddy, I told you that you would wow everybody."

Amie reached across and took Ziva by the hand. "How are you feeling honey?" She asked her.

She smiled and squeezed Amie's hand. "Tired. Still a bit sore, but not bad at all."

Amie nodded. "Well, if you have any problems give me a call."

"I will, and thank you so much. For everything." Ziva said enveloping her in a hug again.

"Oh you're welcome. Besides, you did all the work."

Tony lifted Jake as they began exiting the room. Amie touched Ziva's arm and nodded towards Tony walking in front of them.

"He's cute." She pointed out.

Ziva nodded. "I know. So does he." She said jokingly.

"Friend?" She asked.

Ziva nodded. "My partner. And my boyfriend."

Amie's face split into a large smile. "Oh Ziva, that's wonderful. I'm so proud of you."

Ziva returned the smile. "We still have some things to work out. But I am confident that we will do it."

"Does he know?"

"Yes. He was actually one of the people who rescued me from Somalia. I have told him most of the details. It was hard for him to hear, but he was so supportive."

Tony stopped and turned when he realized that Ziva was lagging behind.

"It is okay Tony, go on ahead. I will be right there." Ziva promised.

Tony smiled and exited out into the now filling up waiting room.

Amie watched Ziva quietly waiting for the younger woman to say what was on her mind.

"I did not think it was possible. But I have told him the worst of what happened in Somalia. I felt that the more I opened up to him, the more weight was lifted off of me. This fear of intimacy I have been carrying around all this time just dissolves when I am with him."

"Really?" Amie said with her brows raised and a smirk. "How intimate?"

Ziva shook her head and blushed profusely. "Some touching and foreplay. However, if I was not still healing from having Jake, I truly feel like I could make love with him without any hesitation."

Amie smiled. "Ziva, that's wonderful. Remember, just don't push yourself. Let it happen naturally. Even when you're healed and I've given you the all clear, if it doesn't feel right then don't force it. If Tony is as special and you think he is, he will wait.'

"I know he will. Thanks again." Ziva hugged her again quickly. Amie motioned towards the door.

"Well, you better catch up to that hunk of a man and your son before they leave without you." She pointed out.

Ziva smiled and exited to the waiting room. "All set?" He asked.

Ziva stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek intimately. Several waiting parents in the room were watching and smiled.

"Ready. Just let me grab my appointment cards and we can go see Josh." She said.

Tony, still taken aback by her public display of affection simple smiled and nodded. "I'll go get Jake strapped in."

By the time Tony had the car seat strapped in, Ziva was climbing into the passenger seat. She tucked the appointment cards into her purse and pulled out her cell phone to alert Eden they were on their way.

To be continued


	26. Chapter 26

**Since everyone has been so generous with the reviews today, I decided to skip dinner and try to get another chapter posted.**

**Or… maybe it's my guilt in not having more time to post. =(**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 26

Tony navigated them across the street and parked in the visitor's lot. He again carried Jake while Ziva toted the diaper bag until they found the outside visitor's picnic area.

Tony sat Jake on a table and settled into a chair next to him and looked over at Ziva. She was beautiful, the sun shining off her dark brown hair, her face lit in a mysterious smile.

"Hey, what are you smiling about?" He asked her teasing.

"To be honest. I do not know. I just feel… good. For the first time in a very long time."

"Yeah well, if I keep lugging little porker around I'm going to have muscles like Superman."

"He is not a little porker." Ziva said with a laugh.

"Sure he is. The doctor even confirmed it. Look at the little fat rolls he has." Tony said, rubbing Jake's fat little cheeks and laughing as the baby immediately tried to nurse.

Ziva laughed and slapped him away gently. "Do not say that. He is just…. Well nourished." Tony then realized that Ziva, who was still standing, was easy prey.

He grabbed her waist, not too hard, and pulled her into his lap. She laughed and settled back against him. "No, you're right. He's just well nourished."

She nodded and leaned her head back closing her eyes.

"And a porker." He said again causing her to elbow him in the ribs.

"Omph!" He exclaimed laughing.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the happy family." The familiar voice broke Tony and Ziva out of their antics and turn their attention.

"Josh!" Ziva exclaimed, jumping from Tony's lap and heading towards the wheelchair that Eden was pushing Joshua in.

"Hey beautiful." He greeted, hugging her weakly and smiling. "Sorry we interrupted."

"Do not be silly. We are here to see you." She corrected him.

"Well, let me see that gorgeous baby over there." Josh said nodding at Tony who stood and moved his chair away allowing Eden to move Josh's wheelchair right up to the baby.

Josh pulled a hand out from under the blanket he had covering him, an IV tube still attached, and reached out finding Jake's little hand under his blanket.

"Hey little man. How are you? Do you remember me?" He asked quietly.

Jake opened his eyes and looked at Joshua focusing on the man that was now adorning attention on him.

Josh turned and smiled. "He's grown since I last saw him. He looks different."

Eden leaned over admiring Jacob. "He still looks like Ziva."

Ziva sat in an empty chair and tilted her head to the side. "I think he looks like Ari." She said. Eden shuffled her feet slightly. She reached down and locked the wheels of the wheelchair and sat next to Ziva.

Josh shook his head. "Nah, he's going to look like his father. You'll see."

Ziva shrugged. "I do not even remember the faces in the pictures we looked through. Do you think he will?"

Josh nodded. "Absolutely. Mark my words."

"How can you forget what they looked like? You have a photographic memory!" Eden asked laughing.

Ziva shrugged. "He showed them to me when I was about four Mojitos over my limit. He could have shown me a picture of a bear and I would have agreed." She said laughing.

Josh, despite being sickly and weak, managed a sneaky look. "That was my intention." He said smiling. Reaching his hand out, he took Tony's and pulled the man closer.

"Step closer Tony, don't be shy. Not around this bunch."

Tony smiled sheepishly and stepped forward, sitting next to Ziva. Their hands subconsciously sought each other out and joined. He leaned over and kissed the side of her head.

"Alright you two, stop being so damn cute." Eden warned causing the others to laugh.

Josh was enthralled with Jake, studying him as if he was attempting to remember every inch of him.

"This was a great surprise guys, thanks for bringing him."

Ziva leaned forward. "I wish I could bring him more often. But he's too little to bring upstairs."

Josh shook his head. "Don't. Don't expose him to all of that death and sickness. Let him stay innocent for as long as he can." He said quietly.

"Do you want to hold him?" Ziva asked getting ready to stand and take the baby out of his carrier.

Josh shook his head. "I wish I could. But I don't think I could hold him right now." He said sadly.

Tony jumped out of his seat immediately. "Bull."

Tony expertly removed Jake from the carrier and dropped to his knees in front of Josh. Tony held the baby out and laid him gently in Josh's arms. Using his hands, Tony helped Josh support the baby in his arms.

Everyone was silent for a long period of time. Josh stared down at Jake in wonderment. Eden broke the spell by glancing over at Ziva who had tears openly streaming down her face.

"Thank you Tony." The man that Tony once believed was his rival whispered to him. He looked the sick man in the eyes and smiled slightly. "Anytime man. You've given me so much and I barely know you."

Josh shook his head slightly and returned his gaze to the baby. Jake was content for a while but then began to squirm. Josh held him out to Tony who pulled him close to his chest and glanced at his watch. "Right on schedule." He said looking at Ziva.

She smiled and reached into the diaper bag pulling out a nursing blanket. She stood and turned her chair to allow a bit of privacy from the hospital's entrance to the picnic area. Taking Jake, she settled into the chair and within moments had him happily nursing under the blanket.

Tony was able to save his knees and stood brushing them off. "How did his appointment go?" Josh asked.

Tony smiled. "He passed with flying colors." Tony said with fatherly pride.

"Of course. We didn't expect anything less." Josh said with equal pride causing Ziva to smile.

"Eden, I hate to ask you this. But I have something in my room for Ziva and Tony. Can you run up and get it?" He asked.

"Sure. I have a phone call to make anyway." She said getting to her feet and heading towards the hospital.

"It's a manila envelope inside my bedside table." Josh called to her. She raised her hand in acknowledgement.

Ziva turned her head towards Josh. "Please do not tell me she is calling who I think she is."

Josh grimaced and nodded. "She's a gluten for punishment."

Ziva rolled her eyes and turned back towards the baby. "You are not eating much little one. Too much excitement for you today? Hmm?" She asked gently. Glancing under the blanket, she used her finger to rub Jake's cheek and cause him to begin drinking again.

"He'll eat good later, I'm sure." Tony promised.

She nodded and waited a few moments. Jake again had stopped drinking so she broke his hold on her breast and handed him off to Tony.

As Ziva put herself back together, Tony began burping Jake. Josh watched the two of them work in tandem with interest.

"Do you two always do that?"

Tony and Ziva both looked at him confused. "Do what?" Ziva asked.

"Work in perfect harmony." Josh answered. Ziva blushed a little but Tony smiled brightly.

"Yeah, I guess we do."

Once Jake was burped and tucked back into his carrier, Josh looked over at his friends. "Jake is content for a minute. Why don't you two step into the cafeteria and get something to eat or drink?" He said.

Ziva smiled. "I could really use a cup of coffee."

"Go, it's right through the door there. Jake is snug in his carrier." Josh implored.

"Do you want anything?" Tony asked as him and Ziva began walking away.

Josh shook his head. He watched as their hands found one another again as they walked.

"You know what Jake, you are one lucky little boy." Josh leaned forward and placed a hand on the baby's belly. "I would have been the best father for you. You never would have needed to ask for anything. I would have given you the world."

Jake's eyes fluttered open focusing on Josh. "I was the one who talked to you through your Mommy's belly. I was the one who cut your umbilical cord. I couldn't wait to see you grow up."

Josh paused for a moment glancing towards the door. He could see Tony and Ziva standing there, sipping coffee and talking softly. He turned back to the baby.

"Inside of you holds one of my biggest secrets… my biggest betrayals. The day may come when your Mommy finds out. I hope she doesn't hate me forever. Make sure she doesn't, will you?" He asked, of course not expecting an answer.

Jake continued to watch him his expression starting to change slightly as he sensed the emotion around him.

"One more thing Jake, between you and me. This is going to be goodbye between us son. I'll never get to see you again. I'll never get to hold you. This evil monster is killing me. I won't be around much longer. But I can go peacefully now knowing that you and your Mom are going to be okay. Tony is a wonderful father to you. You grown up to be big and strong. Don't give Tony and Ziva too much trouble. And try to remember, deep down, that I love you with all my heart, even though I knew you for such a short time."

Josh turned when he heard the doors open seeing Eden, Ziva and Tony returning. Josh quickly wiped the tears from his eyes that had begun to fall.

Using what little strength he had, he forced a smile. "See, I didn't even drop him on the ground."

Ziva threw a mock glare at him. "That's not funny. What is he filling your head full of, huh?" Ziva asked.

"Just secrets for Jake and me to know, you never to find out." Josh said.

He took the envelope from Eden and opened it, sliding out a bundle of papers. He turned his attention to Tony and Ziva. "When Jake was born, Ziva and I had my name put on his birth certificate." He began, pausing as he began to get light headed.

Ziva reached forward. "Josh, go upstairs and rest. We can do this another day." She said.

He shook his head. "No. I just- After you came to see me the last time Tony, and from talking to Ziva on the phone, I realized what I had to do." He held out the papers to Tony who took them in confusion.

"What is this?" He asked.

"I called my attorney. I had his draw up official adoption papers. All you and Ziva need to do is sign and return them to him. He'll have Jake's birth record amended and a new birth certificate drafted. You'll then be Jake's father not just by name, but by law."

Tony was stunned and almost dropped the papers on the ground in front of him. He turned to Ziva who looked just as stunned.

"Josh, you didn't have to do this-" She started.

He held up his hands. "Yes I did."

Ziva's face flashed a moment of anger. "And what happens if suddenly you go into remission again? Then what?" She demanded.

Josh shrugged. "Then I'll be his crazy Uncle Josh that spends way too much time mooching off his Mommy and Daddy. Ziva honey-" He reached out and took her hands.

"When we started this, and you finally got pregnant, you told me that you had almost everything you ever wanted."

She nodded and pulled one of her hands away, wiping away a tear.

"Almost. You said almost. From that moment on I decided that I was going to do everything in my power to give it all to you." He gestured towards Tony. "Now you have it. This is just finalizing everything in the eyes of the law."

Ziva wouldn't look Josh in the face. Tony leaned forward and placed a hand on Josh's knee. "Are you sure?" He questioned.

Josh used his free hand and grasped Tony's. "Absolutely. More than I've ever been about anything." Josh let go of Tony and hooked Ziva under her chin, forcing her to look at him.

"Ziva. You and Eden have always been my entire world. I can give you this. Let me." He implored.

Ziva stood suddenly and wrapped her arms around Josh, crying harder now and not doing anything to stop herself.

Eden had watched silently, knowing what Josh was doing. 'He's tying up his loose ends before he dies.' She thought to herself.

That realization mixed with Ziva's crying had become too much for Eden. As her eyes began to sting she too stood and wrapped her arms around Eden and Josh.

Josh reached his free hand out from the bundle he was in and found Tony's. "Wow, this remind me of these two women I met in Paris about six years ago-" Josh started causing the women to laugh and break apart.

Ziva settled next to Tony and took his hand in hers. "We will talk about this later, yes?" She asked him. He nodded in response.

The four adults sat around chatting for the next few minutes giving Tony and Ziva time to finish their drinks. They were about done when Josh began showing signs that he was tired.

"I hate to do it guys, but I think it's time for me to get back into bed." He said sadly.

Ziva nodded. "Yes, and I fear Jacob has gotten more fresh air than he should have." She said.

Josh leaned forward one more time, placing his hand on Jacob's stomach. "Remember what I told you little one."

Ziva leaned forward and hugged Josh, holding him for several moments and whispering in his ear; "Thank you."

Josh waved her off and turned to Tony, holding an arm out to him. Tony gratefully hugged Josh. "I always wanted a brother Tony. It looks like you're it now." Josh mumbled to him.

Tony smiled as he pulled away. "I'm proud to know you Josh." He responded.

Eden said something to Ziva in Hebrew, bent to gently kiss Jake goodbye and threw a wave to Tony. Unlocking the wheelchair, she began pushing Josh back inside.

They watched them disappear through the doors silently before Tony spoke up. "Wow, he is an amazing man." He said.

Ziva smiled and nodded. Grabbing the papers and putting them back in the envelope, she stuffed it into the diaper bag. "Can we just get out of here, please? I need to rest." She said.

Tony looked at her worriedly and nodded. He checked the area one more time making sure everything had been packed away. Grabbing the baby, he lead Ziva back towards the car.

To Be Continued


	27. Chapter 27

**SNOW DAY! Again…. Like Southern New Jersey needed another foot of snow. =(**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 27

The trip to Tony's apartment building was spent mostly in silence. He had attempted to engage Ziva in conversation, but was met only with one word answers or nods of her head.

Her odd behavior has started when Josh had presented the adoption papers to them. Deep down, this had Tony worried immensely. She had voiced on more than one occasion that she wanted Tony to be Jake's father, but had she changed her mind now that they were faced with the reality of making it legal?

He sighed as he pulled Ziva's SUV into his parking spot. She seemed lost in thought, staring out of the passenger side window as if she didn't realize where they were.

"Home sweet home." He muttered. She snapped her head around and smiled faintly towards him.

Tony watched her closely as she gingerly exited the truck and opened the back door, grabbing Jake's diaper bag from next to the sleeping baby. As Tony came around she grinned at him.

"I've noticed you like the attention you get carrying him." She pointed out causing him to smile.

"Actually, I just want to carry him while I can. I really don't want to take this trip to Los Angeles." He said with a sigh.

She waited for Tony to get Jake completely out of the car before closing the door behind them. "You do not have a choice Tony. We would rather have you here too, but we cannot run the risk of angering Gibbs…. Or Vance for that matter."

He nodded as he held the door open for her. "It won't take me long to pack. You can lay down with the baby if you want."

She nodded as the elevator door opened for them. "I think I will take you up on that. I am feeling quite tired."

"Are you sure that's all it is?" He asked her.

She looked at him puzzled. "What do you mean?"

Before he could answer, the elevator door opened allowing a young blonde woman to enter. "Tony DiNozzo! Where have you been hiding?" She exclaimed.

The blonde had immediately piqued Ziva's attention. She studied her closely, noting the tight clothing complete with the low cut top that was showing cleavage that she had to have paid for. Or had someone else pay for on her behalf.

"Oh, hey Mandy. Not hiding, just been busy." Tony said uncomfortably, lifting Jake's carrier to point out the fact that he had the baby in his hands.

"Oh, who's this little one? Are you babysitting for someone?" She asked.

Before Tony could answer, Ziva had moved across and pressed up to Tony's side. "And who is this, DEAR?" She asked innocently, putting emphasis on the endearment.

'Oh boy.' Tony thought to himself. "Mandy, this is my girlfriend Ziva, and this is Jake."

The blonde immediately stepped back slightly. "And Jake is-"

Ziva answered immediately. "Our son." She said with a bit of satisfaction in her voice.

"Oh, well congratulations. He's real cute." Mandy moved to where Ziva had been standing and pulled out her cell phone, immediately engrossing herself in a text message.

The elevator stopped again depositing all of the riders at their desired floor. Mandy exited first, waggling her hips as she walked away. "See ya around!" She called.

Tony looked at Ziva and couldn't help but smile. "Did I just see claws and fangs?" He asked Ziva who snorted and walked past him.

"Someone should teach her not to mess with a woman who has recently given birth." She muttered as she walked up to his door.

Before unlocking his door, Tony placed a hand on her arm. "Hey, just for the record. Nothing happened between her and I. She offered but-"

Ziva grinned. "Oh, I know that."

"How do you know?" He asked opening the door and standing back to allow her to enter.

She shrugged. "She still likes you." She pointed out before entering.

Tony shook his head. Somewhere in the recesses of his mind, he was embarrassed by the fact that she was right. Most of his previous relationships ended with the woman hating him for life.

Ziva glanced around his apartment and deposited her belongings on the sofa. Tony put Jake down on the counter and threw his keys on the countertop. Ziva went over and unbuckled Jake, snuggling him close to her chest.

"Go ahead and lay down. I'll wake you when I'm done." Tony told her.

She smiled and quietly exited the room, disappearing into Tony's bedroom.

He wandered into his bathroom and pulled out his travel toiletry kit, checking it's contents and adding/subtracting what he thought would be needed. Satisfied that he had gotten that set, he walked quietly into his bedroom and was surprised to see that Ziva was still awake.

She had set a pillow at the edge and put Jake between her and the pillow. She was laying on her side with her hand on Jake's belly staring at him.

Tony walked up to the bed and sat beside her. "Are you okay?"

She didn't turn her attention to him but nodded her head.

He took a deep breath. "Is it the adoption papers? Don't you want me to sign them?"

She quickly turned on to her back and looked at him, placing her hand on his arm. "No, do not ever think that. I meant what I said. You are Jake's father. It is only right that we make it legal."

Tony took her hand in his and played with her fingers. "Then what is it? Something has been bothering you ever since Josh gave us the papers."

She tightened her grip on his hand and gave it a gentle tug, signaling what she wanted. Turning back on her side facing the baby, she sighed contentedly when Tony spooned up behind her, wrapping his arm around her stomach.

"I am losing him." She said quietly.

Tony nodded. "I noticed how weak he looked." He said.

"It is not just that…" She paused and smiled slightly when Jake moved in his sleep, his small arm popping up so he could tuck his fist under his chin.

"He is breaking his promise to me." She said quietly.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

She sighed and used her pointer finger to trace down Jake's chest and belly causing him to smile before his small mouth began it's imaginary sucking motion again.

"This… it is going to hard for you to hear, but you must. It cannot be left unsaid."

Tony's stomach began to churn slightly. "Okay-"

She turned onto her back to look him in the eyes. "When you killed Michael… you asked me if I loved him. I did not, our relationship had not had time to grow to that point. But when he died, and I found out that he was under orders from my Father… I felt betrayed."

Tony nodded but did not speak, allowing her to gather her thoughts before continuing.

"At that very moment, when I had thrown you to the ground and was looming over you with my gun, I… I broke." Tears began to stain her eyes causing Tony to place his palm softly on her cheek.

She smiled in gratitude, placing her hand over his and intertwining their fingers. She stared quietly at their joined hands for several moments before continuing. "At that point, almost every person in my life had betrayed me. My brother, my father, my lover, you, Gibbs…. I even felt like McGee and Abby had betrayed me."

His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at her waiting for her to explain. "At that point, with everything going through my head, I knew that they had helped you and Gibbs, and had been doing it behind my back. In my head, that was a betrayal. I just… I could not take it anymore. No one really cared about me. In my mind, I was unlovable and I could not figure out why."

Her tears were running freely down her cheeks causing Tony to choke up. "Ziva, that's not true-" He began. She placed her pointer finger on his lips to silence him.

"When I walked away from you and walked through those doors, I knew that I could not work with any of you anymore. That was why I told Gibbs' we could not work together anymore. When that plane took off, carrying all of you away from me, my Father walked up to me and put his arm around me. He told me of the mission to Somalia and how he wanted me to join Malachai's team. Sitting on the Damocles I kept staring at a picture of Ari, Tali and myself when we were children. Right then and there I knew one thing…"

"What?" He asked.

"I had to die. I wanted to die. I could not stand losing anyone else in my life. I-" She stopped again to bring her emotions in check. Tony felt sick to his stomach but remained silent to allow her to get it off of her conscious.

"I thought about killing myself, right there on the Damocles. But I could not do that to Malachai. He and I have known one another for years. He has always been a friend to me. And being down one team member would make the mission that much more dangerous for him. But when it all fell apart, and I was the only one left standing on that dock in Somalia, I knew then and there it was my opportunity. I felt so relieved. I could die in a blaze of glory, at least making my Father proud. When I walked away, I could hear Malachai yelling at me in the background, but I felt such a sense of peace come over me. This was it, it was my way out."

"But Saleem didn't kill you." Although it was obvious, Tony felt the need to point it out.

She nodded. "I held out as long as could. But I broke. I begged him to kill me, over and over. But he would not do it."

Tony wiped tears from her face before leaning down and kissing her forehead. "Well, Jake and I are glad that he didn't." He said causing her to smile slightly.

She leaned up and kissed his lips gently. "I am glad too." She pointed out.

Tony gently traced her face with his hand while he stared into her eyes. "I'm so sorry-" He began.

She again reached up and stopped him with a finger to his lips. "No, this is not about that. I… I have not admitted this to many people. As a matter of fact, it took me many long talks with Amie before I could ever admit to myself that I was suicidal. But Tony, that is the case. I was suicidal. I would have killed myself and not thought twice about it."

Tony flinched outwardly. She reached up and ran her hands through his hair. "I told Josh this. He made me promise that if things ever fell apart for me like that again, that I will turn to him and not give up. I made him promise me the same thing, that if he were to ever get sick again that he would fight and not give up. He could not leave me alone."

He bent and kissed her tear stained cheek. "You think he's given up?"

She nodded. "I know he has. I can tell. He feels as if he is not breaking his promise because I have Jake and you now. I should not feel this way. He is a magnificent man and I love him dearly. I do not want to lose him. But at the same time, I also do not want him to suffer."

Tony thought for several moments. "At least now, he can go peacefully." He pointed out.

Ziva took a deep breath and wiped her face. She grabbed a quick kiss from him and then sat up. Carefully, she climbed from the bed. "Wait here." She said disappearing through the door.

Tony sat and mulled over her confession. Deep down, he knew that she wasn't in the right state of mind when they were in Tel Aviv. However, he'd never allowed himself to imagine how bad it had been.

'If she had killed herself because of me…' he thought quickly vanquishing the thought from his mind. "She didn't. She's fine." He reminded himself, wishing she would return to the room.

She did, with a smile on her face and the adoption papers in her hand. She crawled back into her spot on the bed and leaned back into Tony's chest. "We should look at these, yes?"

Tony nodded. "Ziva, are you sure about this?"

She turned and looked him straight in the eye, their noses almost touching. "More sure than I have ever been about anything."

He smiled and kissed her quickly, allowing her to settle back into his chest. They read through the "legal-ese" in the documents together. Ziva still held the ink pen in her hand.

"Tony, I have to ask…. Are YOU sure about this? This means, that no matter what happens between us, you will always be Jake's father."

"I know what's going to happen with us Ziva. We're going to be the best parents that little boy could ever hope for. Our house is going to be filled with more love than he can stand. Maybe… just maybe… he'll even have some brothers and sisters to share it with."

She turned to look at him, a cloud passing over her face. "Tony, Amie did not even think I would be able to get pregnant with Jake, let alone getting pregnant again-" She warned.

He shook his head. "There are other options Ziva. But whatever route we have to go, it's going to be great."

She smiled and kissed him deeply. Tony took the pen out of her hand and scrawled his signature on all of the lines marked by Josh's lawyer. Ziva smiled and followed suit, signing on the lines marked for her.

Satisfied that all was in order, Ziva stifled a yawn and cuddled back down into the pillows. Tony knew that he needed to pack, however his sudden need for validation of Ziva's continued existence was too strong. He settled down next to her and began unbuttoning her blouse. She watched him quietly as he pulled her shirt open and unhooked the front closure of her bra.

Somehow, she knew that his actions weren't sexual. She allowed him to run his hand up her bare stomach and over her left breast. His hand settled there until he could feel her heart beat thumping in her chest.

Tony moved and settled his ear where his hand had previously been. Ziva took his free hand in hers, then used her free arm to wrap around Tony's head and bury her fingers in his hair.

Within minutes, they both slipped into a deep, contented sleep.

To Be Continued


	28. Chapter 28

**Well folks, after much consideration, I've decided to bump the rating of this story up to M. It will give me more leniency as far as writing what pops into my crazy mind and not have to worry about offending someone. However, I don't plan on this story being TOO explicit.**

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. The only profit I'm getting is recognition that there are still TONS of TIVA fans out there like me who are NOT giving up. Mr. Brennan…. We're waiting!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 28

Ziva woke to find Tony gone and her clothing back in place. She wiped her face before glancing over to check on Jake.

He was gone.

Momentary panic swept over her and she quickly checked the floor to ensure he hadn't fallen. Breathing a deep sigh of relief, she slipped out of bed to find where Tony and Jake had gone to.

She walked stealthily into the living room and stopped. The scene before her caused her to smile broadly.

Tony was laying back in his recliner, some movie or another playing on the television. He had Jake sprawled across his chest and was speaking quietly to him.

"See that lady there Jake? Sure she's pretty, and whew, it looks like you could get a lot of good meals from her, and just a few years ago your Daddy would have been all over that. But one day… something really bad happened. But out of all the bad stuff, the most wonderful thing in the world happened. Do you know what that was?"

Jake, of course didn't answer. His eyes were partially opened and he was watching his Father intently. Tony brought his left hand up and took Jake's tiny one in his.

"No idea huh? Well I'll tell you, just this time. The most gorgeous, exotic woman came waltzing into Daddy's life. Within a couple of minutes of talking to her, I saw her shake her beautiful hair out and that was it, she had Daddy hook line and sinker. We took a really long and bumpy road, but guess what? She's your Mommy. And she loves you so much."

Ziva moved quietly across the room until she was in Tony's eyesight. She continued smiling at Tony and sat on his lap, leaning back on her side and against Tony's chest. "And she loves your Daddy very much too little one. Right now she is not too sure how she feels about Daddy showing you all those women on TV."

Tony cradled Jake with one hand and brought his other into her hair. "There are no other women for me on this planet. Not in this life time."

Ziva smirked. "Are you saying that I ruined you for all other women Tony?" She asked teasing.

He smiled slightly but his look suddenly changed very serious. "No, I just don't want any other woman in my life. Ever. Your stuck with me now."

Ziva looked deep in his eyes and placed her hand on Jake's back. "This little boy links us together forever. We are a part of each other now. I can live with that."

Tony's answer was spoken softly. "I think we have always been part of each other. Without even realizing it, you've given me everything I've ever wanted… before I even knew I did. Does that makes sense?"

She smiled and nodded. "Yes."

He smiled. "I knew you'd understand. You tried telling me before… your question about soul mates?"

She nodded at the memory.

"You, Ziva David, are my soul mate."

She leaned up and kissed his lips softly. Jake immediately sensed her closeness and began to fuss causing her to laugh softly.

"Oh I know baby. Your milk machine is close. You are probably very hungry since you did not eat much at the hospital."

She reluctantly stood up and reached down to take Jake. She moved to the sofa and unbuttoned her shirt then frowing when she opened it. "You missed some hooks here Tony." She pointed out as she fumbled to get her bra opened.

He shrugged. "Hey, I'm pro at getting them off not putting them on. Besides, I prefer you without one." He said with a lecherous smile.

She grinned at him before turning her attention to getting Jake to latch on. Within seconds, he was sucking greedily. She pulled her feet up and tucked her left foot under her right knee.

"This may take a while. He is very hungry." She pointed out.

Tony shrugged. "I could sit and watch this forever." He replied.

She grinned. "You know all the right things to say."

That brought a large smile to his face. Their eyes locked and they held one another's gaze for several moments.

"I love you." She whispered softly.

Tony smiled. "I love you, so much. It just doesn't feel like enough to say it."

"It is enough Tony. You have been showing me how much. I can see it in your every action."

They continued to stare at one another before Tony finally looked away with a chuckle.

"Something funny?" She asked.

He nodded. "Good thing McGee isn't here right now. He'll be scampering off looking for a Nutter Butter."

She laughed softly and looked down at the baby. "Are you all packed?"

Tony sighed. "Yeah. I just hope this mission doesn't take the full two weeks."

Ziva suddenly looked self conscious as she shifted a bit on the sofa. "I was thinking-" She suddenly stopped.

"What were you thinking?" He asked.

She looked ready to reply but instead shook her head. "Nothing, never mind."

Tony stood and moved to sit next to her. "Tell me please."

She didn't meet his gaze at first before muttering "Nothing, it's not important."

"Well it must have been important enough for you to bring it up."

Realizing she was not going to win, she sighed then looked at Tony. "I was just thinking, since you were in a packing mood, that if you wanted to pack some things to leave at my apartment-"

Tony laughed which caused her to frown. "Oh no no, beautiful, don't get that look on your face."

He quickly jumped to his feet, kissed her on the head and disappeared down the hall. She looked down at Jake who was still suckling intently but watching her out of the corner of his eye.

"What is your crazy Daddy doing?" She asked him. Jake stopped drinking for a minute and blinked his eyes, his long eyelashes accentuating his expression. Not for the first time, Ziva's breath hitched in her throat as the expression was all too familiar to her.

But just as quick as it was there, it was gone again. Jake began drinking again and her attention was diverted by Tony's return with a large rolling suitcase.

He parked the case next to his bags he had waiting by the door for Los Angeles. He came back to the couch and sat next to her again.

"I packed some things to take over there, I just didn't know how to ask you if it was okay."

She smiled and leaned over grabbing a kiss from him. "I uh… I was thinking… there is something I need to do. It has needed to be done for a while, but I finally feel like now… now I have the courage to do it."

Tony looked at her strangely as she shifted Jake slightly. "I want to invite the team over for dinner. Hopefully they are all free and can come."

He immediately understood what she wanted to do. "You want to clear the air?"

She nodded. "It has been way too long. I feel that if we are going to be together, and put everything out into the open, that I need to do that with our team as well."

He nodded. "Alright, I'll call Abby, she should be able to drag everyone to your apartment, even if they're kicking and screaming."

Ziva smiled. Tony stood and walked over towards the kitchen to make his call. "Tony could you grab my phone for me?"

He nodded and reached into her purse pulling out her cell phone and handing it to her. Expertly with one hand, she managed to flip her phone open and type a message with her thumb.

_Are you free tonight? I may need you._

Several minutes passed before an answer came.

_What time?_

_6PM? My apartment._

_I'll be there._

Turning her attention back to Tony who was speaking quietly with Abby. "Ziva, what time?"

"Around 6:30?"

Tony relayed the time to Abby. After receiving her promise that everyone would be there, he disconnected the phone.

"All set." He announced.

She smiled softly and nodded. "Good." Seeing that Jake was done eating, she used her finger to gently break his hold on her breast. Not bothering to cover herself, she moved Jake and began burping him.

"When I am done. We can head back if you want. I want to make sure the apartment is in some sort of order and we only have a few hours." She pointed out.

"Why don't we just order pizza? It'll be much easier, plus you'll have more leftovers since my flight leaves early in the morning." He suggested.

"Good idea. Pizza sounds lovely."

Jake picked that moment to spit up all over Ziva. "Oh, poor baby, did Mommy let you overeat?" She asked Jake as she took the proffered towel from Tony.

The baby looked rather amused and snuggled up against his Mommy once the mess was cleaned.

Tony grabbed the car keys and motioned towards the door. "I'm going to take my bags down to make it easier to take Jake down." He said.

She nodded and balanced the baby while fixing her clothes again. "Okay, I will start getting him ready."

She watched as Tony disappeared through the door. Getting Jake set into his carrier she sighed then smiled at him. "Mommy is going to have a tough night tonight little one. But I can trust you to have my six, right?"

Jake blinked his sleepy eyes several times in response. Tony came back in and smiled.

"All set?"

Ziva nodded. "Let me just slip on my shoes and we are all set."

She returned a moment later and grabbed the diaper bag, throwing the dirtied towel in. Tony had just picked Jake up and turned towards the door when Ziva stopped him with a touch to his arm.

"I love you." She said steadfastly.

Tony smiled and leaned down to grab her lips. "Don't worry about tonight. I'll be there with you."

She nodded and smiled slightly. "You are what is giving me the strength to do this."

He kissed her again. "Together we're unstoppable." He told her.

She chuckled and followed him out the door.

To be continued


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. Bring on the Ray's and EJ's, TIVA will still win out in the end!**

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"Just One More" Chapter 29

Tony had noticed Ziva's distracted state most of the afternoon. Even while tending to Jake and straightening up the apartment, she didn't seem to be all there.

She was now relaxed in her favorite chair using the breast pump to increase their ever growing storage of milk. At this rate, it seemed to Tony that Jake would have enough breast milk to last him until kindergarten.

Tony had just put Jake down in his bassinette after changing him from the catastrophe that was his diaper. How one little baby could make such a big mess, to the point of it coming out of the side of his diaper just amazed him.

"Okay, stinky baby is clean good smelling baby again." He announced quietly noticing that Jake was beginning to doze.

Ziva smile softly but did not raise her head from the back of the chair. "I think he is very set in his routine. We disrupted that today by taking him out. He had a bit of an upset belly."

"Upset belly? He exploded in his diaper." Tony said with a frown.

She smiled again. "It is not the first time he has managed to do that. Thank you for taking care of it."

Hey flashed her a smile. "Hey, we're a team. Besides, you've got your hands full."

He could tell by looking at her that she was distracted again. He watched her quietly as she finished and put the machine on the coffee table. She quickly got her clothes in order then sighed. Tony stood and walked over to her, dropping on his knees and resting his hands on her thighs.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

She nodded, not making eye contact with him. "I just- I do not want to do this."

"It doesn't have to be tonight Ziva. Don't push it if you're not ready. Your friends aren't going anywhere."

She looked at him and smiled, placing her hand on his cheek. "You are so special to me. It's been over two years since Somalia Tony. I cannot keep it bottled up. If we are going to move forward, and I mean truly move forward, I need to unburden myself. Do you know what I mean?"

He took her hand off of his cheek and kissed it. "I do. Just remember that I'm here with you, and I'll help you through. And I'll hold you tight all night tonight to keep the monsters out of your dreams."

She smiled and leaned forward, kissing him gently. "You need to sleep. You have a flight to catch early tomorrow morning."

He noticeably winced at the reminder. A knock at the door drew his attention to the clock. "Hmmm, somebody's early." He said standing and moving towards the door.

"That would be Amie. I asked her over as well. I feel like I need her tonight." Ziva said.

Tony nodded and opened the door, a strange feeling overtaking him. He'd never heard Ziva admitting to needing anything, let alone anyone. He pushed it aside and flashed his charming DiNozzo smile as he opened the door.

"Dr. Henderson." He said in greeting causing her to chuckle.

"Oh please Tony, I'm not at the office. Please call me Amie." She responded entering the apartment after Tony gestured her inside.

She saw Ziva picking up the breast pump with both bottles full and nodded her head. "Well, THAT is certainly a good sign." She said.

Ziva chuckled and shook her head. "If I did not have this pump I fear I would explode." Amie laughed and allowed Tony to take her purse and jacket.

Ziva was somewhat quiet which lead Tony to believe she was holding back. "Hey, I tell you what. Why don't I order dinner and go pick it up before the gang gets here?"

She eyes him suspiciously. "You do not have to do that Tony."

He shrugged. "I know. But it'll be quicker if I do. And I'm starving so they better not be late."

Amie had sat on the sofa and watched their interaction with interest. As Tony ordered the pizza, and Ziva finished separating, marking, and placing some milk in the freezer and the rest in the fridge, she turned to Amie and smiled.

"Something to drink?"

"Nope, I'm fine."

Jake apparently sensed someone new was in the room. Instead of staying asleep, he began to fuss and throw his arms around in his bassinette.

Amie was on her feet in seconds and reached down to pick up the squirming baby. "Hey hey little one. Come here, let me get a better look at you." She said. Jake immediately opened his eyes and focused on the stranger.

"Oh Ziva, he is gorgeous. Look at those eyelashes." She gushed.

"He would not be here if it wasn't for you." Ziva replied.

Amie looked at her and shrugged. "I just got him in there and back out, all the rest was completely you."

Ziva chuckled as she finished in the kitchen then moved to sit in her chair. Amie pulled Jake's blanket down a bit and studied him. "He looks like you." She stated.

She shook her head. "I think he looks like my brother. Ari and I both resemble our Father. Of course, if I remember correctly, the sperm donors Josh had picked out had our dark features as well."

Amie thought for a moment. "You know what, I can't remember. I sit with so many couples looking at so many photos. The donors all just become numbers to me."

Ziva smiled. "Josh wanted the baby to look like me. So he chose men with dark hair and eyes and my complexion. He even tried to get me drunk the night he showed me the photos, but I remember." She laughed.

"Well, I think he was successful. This is one gorgeous little boy." Amie commented.

Tony listened to the interaction from the kitchen and smiled. 'Of course he's gorgeous.' He thought.

He grabbed his keys and walked into the living room. "Well, I'm going to get going. They said 20 minutes, I'm sure it'll take longer unless I'm there to pressure them. I'll grab drinks there as well. Amie, is there anything in particular you like?"

"Diet Coke would be wonderful. Thank you Tony."

He flashed her another grin and moved over to Ziva. "Anything special for you."

She shook her head. "Diet Coke is fine for me too."

He smiled and nodded, kissing her on the head. "Have a good talk." He whispered softly to her before exiting the apartment.

Amie smiled. "He's gorgeous too Ziva." She gestured with her head towards where Tony has just been standing.

She nodded in agreement.

"But I take it that's not why you invited me over here tonight." She commented.

"No, it is not." Ziva paused. Amie waited for several moments before raising her eyebrows and looking at her.

"Tony and I are getting closer and closer by the minute. When I am able, I truly feel like we could move on to the next step in our relationship. I have told Tony a lot about Somalia, but not all of it. Our team is like our extended family. No, not extended family. They are our family. For Tony and I to be able to have this relationship…. It is going to be hard. Not only is it a new step for us, but we work together. Plus, we are starting our relationship with a newborn baby. For most couples, that comes in the middle."

Amie smiled at how quickly Ziva was speaking. "Both of you are going to need your friends for support." She pointed out.

Ziva nodded. "Yes. And I feel that if turn to them for help, I owe it to them to be honest. And, I need to unburden myself before Tony and I can m- move forward."

"You mean sex, yes?" Amie clarified.

Ziva flushed a bit and nodded. Amie smiled and reached her free hand out and out it on Ziva's leg.

"Don't be embarrassed Ziva. You know that I'm going to be blunt and to the point."

Ziva smiled. "Yes. I do know that. I just- when the time comes, I do not want to freeze up or panic."

Amie thought for a moment then smiled down at Jake who had fallen asleep in her arms. Standing, she moved over and placed Jake back in his bassinette.

"How have you felt so far?"

Ziva thought for a moment. "I, I struggled to undress in front of him first. I was ordered to undress on several occasions while I was held captive. When I refused, I was punished severely. I did not think I would be able to ever undress in front of a man again."

"But you got through it." Amie pointed out.

Ziva smiled and nodded. "I did. I was ashamed of my scars as well. I did not want him to see the ugly reminders of Somalia."

"What did he do?"

Ziva smiled at the memory. "He kissed them, every one of them. He exuded so much love with every touch of his lips. I have never felt that before."

Amie smiled. "And now you can undress in front of him with no problem?"

She nodded. "I do not even think twice about it. I mean, we have not gone TOO far."

"You CAN'T go too far." The doctor in Amie reminded her.

Ziva nodded. "We've touched… a lot. And I was okay with that. But sleeping was another matter."

"How so?"

"During our sleep, I had turned on my side. He was cuddled up behind me which was fine. But, at some time during the night-"

Amie allowed Ziva a moment to continue. When she didn't, she attempted to fill in the blanks.

"He was sleeping behind you and became aroused?" She asked.

Ziva flushed again and looked away, nodding slightly. "I panicked a bit when I realized, but I forced myself to relax and eventually I fell back to sleep. It brought on nightmares that I have not had in a long time."

Amie nodded. "It's entirely natural. Ziva, you've comes to terms with your body. Even after giving birth, and your body is acting crazy, you've come to terms with what your body is and how it reacts. You need to come to terms with his body. "

Ziva thought for a moment. Amie tossed her coppery hair behind her shoulder before continuing. "Men become erect. It's not always sexual. When men are in R.E.M sleep, it's a natural neurological response of the body to replenish blood to the penis. That is why they sometimes get erections during sleep. It's not always sexual."

The younger woman stared at her hands. "It scared me." She finally admitted.

Amie nodded. "I bet it did. Ziva, you've had so many major things happen in your life recently. You've told me in the past that you never really had a long term, healthy relationship in your life. And now, you've just had a baby, one of your lifelong friends is very ill, and you're kicking off a brand new relationship with someone you've loved for a long time. Hell Ziva, I would feel scared right now too."

She smiled. "I does seem to be a bit much. But Amie, I want him. I want to be with him. I am just worried about what will happen-."

"Has he tried to force you to do anything?" Amie asked concerned.

Ziva immediately shook her head. "No, he has been wonderful. He would never force me into anything like that."

Amie nodded. "Okay then. Because you are still healing you can't experience penetration-" Ziva shifted uncomfortable in her seat which caused Amie to smile. "Again, with the bluntness. But Ziva honey, you need to hear this."

Ziva's reddened face turned to Amie. "Because you can't go THAT far yet, doesn't mean you can't tease, and experiment. Try different things to gauge how your body and mind is going to react. Be happy that your even in the mood to think about it. Some women don't want to think about sex for months after giving birth."

"I believe I am healing well. The spotty bleeding has stopped, and my stitches are almost all gone-"

"Don't even think about it." Amie warned. "I don't want to see you in my office until at least five weeks postpartum. "

Ziva's face fell a bit which caused Amie to smile. "If I had a man that looked like that, I'd probably be anxious too. But here's what you can do-"

The two women continued to talk and share ideas until keys could be heard in the door. Tony walked in balancing pizzas in hand and a bag with bottles of soda.

"This smells delicious!" He exclaimed placing the bounty off food on the table. He glanced over at the two women in the living room and noticed that Amie looked amused, Ziva…. Ziva looked like that cat who ate the canary.

Before he could ask, there was a knock on the door. The gang had arrived.

To Be continued


	30. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. Bring on the Ray's and EJ's, TIVA will still win out in the end!**

**Wow, this was a tough chapter to write. Hopefully, I did it some justice.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 30

Abby, McGee, Gibbs and Ducky had all arrived within minutes of one another. Palmer arrived last with a bottle of wine and Ziva's favorite flavor of cheesecake for dessert.

Everyone was introduced to Amie who blended well with the crowd. Abby watched her out of the corner of her eye for a while. But all was forgotten once Jacob had awoken and Team Gibbs took turns passing him around.

Gibbs sat and watched Tony and Ziva closely. He noticed she seemed a bit jittery, and every once in a while Tony would surreptitiously reach his hand out and rub the small of her back in comfort.

The gang was enjoying their pizza and laughing when Jake, who was taking his turn with McGee, began to fuss. With lightening quick sweep, Tony was on his feet and had a bottle out of the refrigerator.

Gibbs watch with amusement as Tony pulled the bottle warmer forward on the counter, added water to it and had the bottle warming in seconds.

McGee suddenly seemed unsure of holding the infant and began getting a look of panic in his eyes. Gibbs, still amused at watching how quickly Tony reacted to the baby, took pity of McGee and held his arms out to take Jacob.

Tony came forward after testing the bottle temperature on his wrist. He began to reach for Jake when Gibbs shook his head slightly. "Sit, relax. I've got him."

Tony nodded his appreciation to Gibbs and handed the bottle to him. Jacob immediately latched onto it and began drinking.

Amie smiled. "It's good to see that he's not a picky eater."

Ziva smiled. "A friend even gave him formula once, he drank that too. He does not care, as long as his belly gets filled up."

Ducky sat forward. "Well, as enjoyable as this evening has been, why do I have a feeling there is a bit of an ulterior motive to this evening's festivities?"

Tony and Ziva shared a look before Ziva's eyes dropped to her hands. Without anyone realizing, Amie moved from her chair to set on the sofa next to Ziva giving her a support system on both sides.

Ziva shifted a little in her seat before looking at Ducky. "There is-"

"So wait, did you get us all together to tell us that you and Tony are together now… like a couple? Cuz if you did we already figured that out."

Ziva looked at her strangely, choosing to allow Abby to change the subject instead of broaching the subject she wanted to. "You did?"

"Well yeah… well sort of. I mean, you two are together, right?" Abby asked suddenly unsure.

Tony decided to bail Ziva out of this one. He took her hands in his and kissed them gently. "We are."

Palmer suddenly felt the need to interject. "Wait, and Gibbs is okay with this?"

Gibbs turned his glare towards the young man. "I'm sitting right here Palmer. And it wasn't like I had much of a choice."

Ducky chuckled. "Jethro saw this coming from almost day one."

Ziva looked at Gibbs. "You did?"

Gibbs shook his head. "I figured the two of you would find a way to break every rule I laid down."

Amie snickered into her hand. Ziva was reminded that she was sitting there and why.

"This is true Gibbs, and that is part of the reason we called you all here tonight…"

She took a deep breath, glanced briefly at Amie, then to Tony. He still held one of her hands in his. Seeing her struggle, he squeezed it in support.

"In order for Tony and I to give Jake the kind of life that we want, we have to start with a clean slate. Not just for us, but everyone in involved in our daily lives. Tony brought to my attention that I have been… remiss… in my relationships with some of you. I somewhat pulled away from some of you and I want you to understand why. Only then can I move forward."

She paused again to wrestle her jumbled thoughts together. McGee took her pause as a moment to speak up. "Ziva, we understand, what happened in Somalia-"

"No McGee, you do not know anything about Somalia. I have never opened up to any of you about. Ducky knows a little, but only on medical basis."

She threw a look at Amie who placed a reassuring hand on her knee.

Ziva took a deep breath. "When I introduced Amie to all of you, I actually was not 100% honest. She is a very dear friend, but she's been much more to me than that."

All eyes turned to Amie who spared Ziva a few moments. "I'm a doctor, ob/gyn and a fertility specialist. I was the one who delivered that pudgy little boy over there."

Gibbs glanced down at the baby in his arms, half drinking from his bottle and half absorbing everything happening in the room around him.

"Amie also works with local hospitals…." Ziva faltered again.

"I am also a trained psychotherapist, and I treat victims of rape and abuse."

Amie's words sunk in to everyone. Abby and McGee shifted uncomfortably in their seats.

"Amie was called in after Ducky took me to Bethesda. She took care of me there, and later down the road, when I began to struggle, I joined one of her counseling groups. I have been attending on and off ever since. I asked her here for moral support."

Ziva noted that Jake was done drinking his bottle. He'd almost drained it and was struggling to stay awake. She stood and held out her arms, allowing Gibbs to place him securely in her grasp. She sat back in her place, putting Jake on her shoulder to burp him.

She stole a quick kiss from him, his downy baby hair ticking her nose. "I can do this for both of us." She whispered to him.

"When I first came to the United States, I thought I would only be here for a short time. My intention was to come here, finish my mission and leave again, never to have to deal with any of you ever again. Director Shepard thought that my orders were to help prove Ari's innocence. She had no idea he was my brother. And deep down, I really did think he was innocent, and I was going to prove ALL of you wrong. He was my brother, he could not be the horrible monster everyone thought him to be. Director Shepard was incorrect however. My orders from my Father was not to prove Ari's innocence, but to kill him and gain Gibbs' trust. That way, Gibbs' could be another tool we could use if need be." She paused briefly as the baby pulled his body tightly then let out a rather loud belch. Everyone in the room smiled allowing the tension to ease a bit.

Ziva checked the baby and continued to rub and pat his back. "That day, in Gibbs' basement, you were all led to believe that he killed Ari. But this is not what happened. I heard first hand, the monster that Ari truly was. He not only killed Agent Todd, but he was gloating about attacking my Father and Israel. I could not allow that to happen. "

McGee finished the story. "You shot your brother." He mumbled, his voice displaying a bit of bewilderment.

Ziva's eyes began to sting but she held her tears at bay. "I did… I did it to save Gibbs… and I did it to stop all of the atrocities Ari was going to commit. It was Gibbs' idea to falsify the report and make Mossad believe he had shot him. When I told my father his plan, he was delighted. He was extremely happy that I had accomplished so much on this mission. We allowed Gibbs to falsify the report, and he never knew the truth until all hell broke lose with Michael. But that day, listening to Ari, the seeds of doubt had been planted."

Ziva moved Jake off of her shoulder and placed him in a sitting position on her lap. He leaned back against his Mommy and struggled to stay awake, curious as to what all the visitors were doing.

Above him, Ziva continued. "Jenny and I worked anti terrorist campaigns across the Middle East and Eastern Europe for almost an entire year . One time, she got into trouble in Cairo and was taken captive. My team had orders to withdraw, but we defied our orders and rescued her. We lost one person, but we were able to get her out. " Ziva allowed her gaze to fall on everyone in the room, stopping with Tony.

"My team consisted of myself, Malachai whom you all know, Eden and Michael Rivkin, and Michael's fiancee Hannah. "

"Hannah was the one you lost?" Gibbs asked. Ziva nodded her confirmation.

"When Jenny developed the liaison position with NCIS, I think it was her way of protecting me. She knew that the others never would have gone back in if I had not talked them into it. Our team was one of the best Mossad had. But after the situation with Ari, I was beginning to have doubts. I could share them with Eden, but no one else. When my Father told me one night of Jenny's liaison proposal, I immediately talked him into giving me the position. It would allow me to get away from Mossad for a while, plus… I will admit… all of you intrigued me. I had profiled all of you. I thought I knew everything about all of you. When I was here, I realized how wrong I was." She turned to Tony, briefly removing one secure hand from Jacob and touching Tony's cheek. "Especially about you." She said softly causing him to smile.

Abby's head cocked to the side, and in another time and place, she might have made an "aww" sound. Ziva quickly put both hands back on the baby.

"When I came back here, I wanted to fit in so much. However, I did not know how to dress. I did not know how to act. I pried information from all of you just so I could feel like a member of the team. And, although it was rocky at first, especially with you Abby-" she mock glared at Abby who looked a but sheepish "-after a short while I began to feel welcomed and wanted. I had never felt anything like that in my life. I even told Director Shepard that I loved it here. That was the truth."

She rubbed Jake's belly for several moments. "I found out, that although my Father had told me how much he trusted me, and he was proud of me for taking on this important mission, he was having me watched. When I had gone to Officer Bashan at the Israeli Embassy for help with the Iranians who were trying to frame me, he showed me photos that had been taken of Tony and I. When Gibbs was in Mexico, we would spend a night or two watching movies or kicking over ideas about cases."

Tony smiled slightly and reached over to rub her back. "Around." Ziva looked at him strangely. "Kicked around, not over." He corrected.

She shrugged. "All of you worked together and saved me. I really, truly felt like a member of this team. I had never been part of a family like this one. I foresaw my future here, in the US and not part of Mossad anymore. And then Jenny died, and Vance tossed me aside like I did not matter to NCIS at all. That hurt so much… and I was also confused about my relationship with Tony… it led me to make some poor choices. One of them becoming romantically involved with Michael."

She reached down and scooped Jake into her arms and snuggled him into her chest, almost like a shield. "I made bad choices. But I could handle being used by Michael, I could handle my Father thinking so little of me that he sent Michael to drag me back to Israel. But I could not handle… what I perceived to be all of your betraying me."

All members of Team Gibbs stared at her in shock. Gibbs started to speak but Ziva cut him off. "No, this is not about that Gibbs. All of you were doing your job. But no one… and I mean no one, came to me and asked me anything outright. All of you went behind my back, no one just came to me. In my head, that was yet another betrayal in a myriad that had taken place in my life. I began questioning my life here, and even said to Gibbs that this was not my home. My life was crumbling around me, and the only hope I had was my Father. How can my own Father not care about me, and my well being?"

She stopped as tears began to stream down her cheeks. One fell and struck Jake on the cheek causing him to startle a bit. Ziva bent and kissed his forehead, whispering soothing words to him.

Raising her eyes back to her friends, she sniffed slightly before continuing. "We all know how that went. I could not take it anymore. Mentally I broke, physically I was exhausted. And then you were gone. You left me standing there with my bag on my shoulder. I was ready to die. I wanted to die."

"That was why you took the mission to Somalia." Ducky said quietly.

She nodded. "I had- I had considered killing myself. Then I became ashamed of myself for not having the courage to do it. But the mission to Somalia, it was perfect. Our team had little chance of success anyway. Only three of us survived what happened on the Damocles. Two of them were wounded. I waved goodbye to Malachai and marched off to my death. I welcomed it."

She studied Jake's innocent sleeping features. "I would kill Saleem before the men in the camp could kill me. Everyone wins."

She bent and kissed Jake's forehead again before turning to Tony. She handed him over almost as if she didn't want his innocence tainted by what she was about to reveal.

"There were just too many of them. I fought but they still overtook me. They threw me in a cell for the first day. I could only tell by the temperature change on the walls. But then…. Then the second day…. Saleem wanted information on Mossad. He injected me with something and when I still resisted… he let his men have me."

She began breathing heavily and wasn't making eye contact with anyone in the room which began to make Amie nervous. She reached out and took Ziva's hands, using her other hand to take Ziva gently by the chin and turn her face to her. As their eyes met, Ziva found herself center again, using Amie's touch to ground herself.

"Saleem sat in a chair in the middle of the room. His men were grabbing at me, ripping at my clothes. Two of them had me pinned on my back but I was able to fight them off. I tried to scramble away on my hands and knees but there were too many of them blocking the door…. They were laughing and cheering. I crawled towards Saleem when his men grabbed my legs. They… they pinned me down and began raping me. They…. They were grabbing my hair as they took turns and the others held me. Saleem was sitting ten feet in front of me watching… and smiling. My face kept getting slammed into the concrete floor, my eye was swelling shut… but they still would not stop. I screamed and kicked, but still they would not stop. I began losing count… six or seven different men until I finally lost consciousness. I do not think they stopped even then."

Ziva was crying openly. It took several deep breaths for her to even think about continuing. She looked up and saw tears streaming down Abby's face as well. McGee looked as if he was going to be sick, Palmer looked about ready to run. Ducky's face wore his heart and Gibbs, to Ziva's surprise, looked flushed and glassy eyed.

She then turned her attention to Tony. He was a rock. He continued cradling Jake but when she turned to him, he reached over the kissed her on the forehead.

"I love you. You are amazing." He whispered to her. She smiled through her tears and pecked him quickly on the lips.

"I love you so much.." She returned.

She turned her attention back to their guests. "That was just the beginning of the nightmare. There were many episodes like that. Saleem would promise to make them stop if I gave him the information he wanted. The first time I gave in and told him the information about Mossad's mission in Somalia, he called his men off. They left me alone for several days. They even fed me two meals a day. But it all started again. I gave Saleem all the information I could just to make it STOP, but he wanted more. By then the damage was done."

Tony watched Ziva cradle her belly protectively. He and Amie knew what she meant, even if the others did not. Tony stood and placed the sleeping baby in his bassinette. He kissed the top of Ziva's head before sitting down again.

"Saleem then started a new tactic. His men weren't allowed to touch me anymore, but he always used it as a threat. He would make me beg for food, and when I would not comply he would… force himself into my mouth. In between all of this there were beatings, sometimes with fists, other times he would use whips." She sat quietly for a moment with her eyes closed. "When Saleem was in an especially good mood, he would have his men tie me down and he would question me about NCIS. I told him that I had already told him everything, but he would not believe me. He would rape me with whatever was handy. He was especially fond of the handle to the whip he beat me with."

She stabbed at the tears running down her face as if suddenly angry. She turned her attention to Tony whose eyes were also leaking tears. Not caring who was in the room with them, she slid her feet under her and raised to her knees, kissing his cheeks feverishly.

"Do not give up on me now Tony. I cannot finish this without you." She whispered.

Tony laid his fore head against hers. "I'm not going anywhere beautiful."

She turned her attention away from Tony. "I was dead on the inside. I was just waiting for my body to give up too. And then one day, Saleem barged into my cell and threw a hood over my head. I was wondering what was coming next because he never took me out of my cell. He dragged me down the hallway and slammed me into a chair. When he lifted the hood… my life suddenly started again."

She turned on her knees back towards Tony. "There you were." She told him. "I did not want to believe it. You had to be a trick that Saleem had somehow devised. And then you spoke… and I felt something that I did not believe I could ever feel again."

The room was deathly silent.

"Hope." She said quietly.

"On the flight to Germany, I kept flinching away from the medics. I was terrified that one of them were Saleem and he would drag me back to my cell. Even in the elevator at the office, I could not help but think one of you were going to attack me. The mere thought of having a man standing behind me terrified me. I had physical injuries to work through, and mentally…. I did not even know where to begin. "

She relaxed a bit and settled back on the couch, her feet barely touching the floor. At that moment, she looked so tiny.

"I also had to repair my relationships with all of you. Gibbs rightfully put me through my paces. Ducky, you tried to be such a rock for me. I just could not open up to you like this back then. Your encouragement and smiles meant the world to me." She smiled brightly. "They still do."

She turned her attention to Palmer. "Jimmy, you have never made mention of any of that entire debacle. But, I suspect…." She turned and looked at Tony quickly. "I suspect that you spent a lot of time consoling someone else in this room. And if that is true, I am glad you could be there for him. McGee… you never wavered. You picked up your role in my heart and my big brother. I only wish that Ari was half the brother to me that you are. And Abby, I fear my relationship with you has suffered most of all. I used to love coming down to the lab and just spending time with you. We would laugh and gossip, usually about this one." She gestured towards Tony. "But, when I came back, the day I came into the lab and you let me have it for what I did to Tony, it took all my willpower to stand there."

She began wringing her hands again before sighing. "You always smell like Caf-Pow. Saleem reeked of that smell. Everytime I smell it I cannot help but think of him. It was easier for me to stay out of the lab then to face it. Or admit what I was feeling. By the time I felt strong enough, I did not know how to breach that chasm that was there. I am sorry. I miss our friendship."

Abby couldn't take it anymore. She jumped to her feet and rushed to Ziva pulling her into a huge hug. "Don't be sorry. It's never too late!" She announced exuberantly.

Ziva chuckled "Imagine all the we have to gossip about now." She told her.

Abby grinned knowingly and took her seat beside McGee. Ziva leaned forward and put her hands on her knees.

"I know that I have…. Unloaded a lot on all of you tonight. And it is not normally in my nature to do so. However, I feel that for Tony and I to be successful in all that we have planned, we are going to need our family to support us. You cannot do that unless you know what we are up against." She confessed.

Tony reached over and pulled her into his embrace. She felt emotionally exhausted and just fell against him, her eyes closing slowly as she took comfort in his embrace.

"You're quiet Gibbs." Tony pointed out.

Gibbs looked shell shocked but said nothing. He rubbed his hand over his face quickly and stood suddenly, moving over and kneeling in front of Ziva.

He spoke softly. "You and Abby have filled a void in my heart that I didn't think would ever close. Leaving you on that tarmac in Tel Aviv was one of the hardest things I've ever done. And just the thought… that you were dead, because I wanted to teach you a lesson almost destroyed me. You died on that damn ship when you should have been sitting at your desk driving DiNozzo crazy. I would have gone to the end of the Earth to bring you home. And I'll go to the end of the Earth to see that you're happy."

Ziva who was still wrapped in Tony's arms, smiled and nodded. "I know."

Gibbs stood and reached a hand out to Tony, firmly shaking his hand in appreciation.

He moved back to his seat silently allowing everyone else to absorb all they have been told.

Amie leaned forward to grab everyone's attention. "Ziva has such an amazing support team here. What she did tonight is an incredible step forward." She turned her attention to Ziva. "We've talked about this before. You never truly 'get over' what happened to you. But you heal, physically and mentally. And eventually you are able to move past it. I'm so proud of you."

Ziva teared up again and reached forward to embrace Amie. "I can never thank you for all that you have done for me." Ziva replied to her.

Amie separated from Ziva and waved her off. "Just seeing this life you have set for yourself is all the thanks I need. And not to be rude, but I really must get going. I have a group session in thirty minutes, plus I think my husband has put my photo on a milk carton. "

Amie shook hands and said her goodbyes to everyone. Ziva met her at the door and opened it for her. "Call me if you need me." She told her.

"I will." Ziva promised.

She turned and saw that everyone else was on their feet. "Is everyone leaving?"

Gibbs nodded. "Yeah, you've had a big night. And Tony has a flight to catch early in the morning." He reminded.

Abby pulled Tony then Ziva into a bone crushing hug before exiting. McGee stopped in front of Tony and looked at him, almost as if he was unsure of what to say. Tony just grinned slightly and shook his head, communicating to him that he didn't need to say anything.

"Safe trip." McGee said, reaching out and shaking Tony's hand.

"Thanks." He replied with a chuckle.

Ziva hugged McGee gently. "Thank you for coming."

Palmer was next. Tony slapped him gently on the arm as he stopped in front of Ziva. " I know something bad had happened. I just always figured that if you wanted to talk with me, you would." He explained.

She smiled. "I know Jimmy. Thank you for not pushing me." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him gently on the cheek causing him to blush so deeply even his ears turned red.

Gibbs and Ducky were next, both getting their hugs from Ziva. Gibbs went out in the hallway and watched with satisfaction as the door closed behind him. Down the hallway, he saw Abby enveloped in McGee's arms.

Gibbs walked down and joined them at the elevator. Turning, he addressed all of them. "I've never been more proud of all of you than I was tonight."

Inside the apartment, Ziva turned and collapsed into Tony's arms. She cried silently against his chest and he soothingly ran his fingers through her hair.

Now, her healing could truly begin.

To Be Continued


	31. Chapter 31

**Disclaimer- I still don't own NCIS. Bring on the Ray's and EJ's, TIVA will still win out in the end!**

**You, my lovely readers, really outdid yourselves with reviews for the last chapter. It was hard to write, and I'm sure hard to read, but you all made me feel much better about posting it. Thanks so much! **

**I promise that I am doing the best I can to find time to write. I'm going to be moving in the next few weeks, so between working, commuting, and packing... you can imagine what a mess everything timewise is for me right now. I promise you that I will NOT abandon this story. =)**

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"Just One More" Chapter 31

Tony sent Ziva back to relax on the sofa while he cleaned up the remnants of dinner. He struggled with his emotions about what he had just heard. It made him feel physically ill to hear about what she had gone through. Not for the first time, he wished he could have one more chance to kill Saleem. A bullet to the head was too easy.

Turning to check on Ziva, he smiled slightly when he notes she had dosed off. She was laying with her head against the cushioned arm, her hand tucked under her chin. She looked so peaceful and relaxed, quite a contrast to a mere half hour ago. Tony had to smile when he realized her sleeping position. He went over and glanced down in the bassinette and noticed Jake sleeping in the exact same position.

Sitting in Ziva's favorite chair, the quietness began to overtake him. He couldn't dwell on what Ziva had talked about earlier. He had run through a gambit of emotions, from anger to sadness, disgust, and then anger at himself for not getting to her sooner.

'If you just would have been honest with her, she would have been on that plane with you from Tel Aviv.' He thought. 'All it would have taken was one honest conversation about what you were thinking, and feeling in your heart. But you're so damn screwed up you couldn't do it, and look what happened to her because of it.' Anger overtook him again and before he knew it, he'd kicked out and unintentionally kicked the edge of the coffee table.

Ziva startled awake, momentarily disoriented. "What was that?"

Tony calmed himself immediately. "Nothing, I tripped on the table." He shrugged.

She rolled her eyes slightly then stretched her long frame. "How long was I sleeping?"

Tony felt guilty over the lie he just told. "About half an hour. How do you feel?"

Ziva thought for a moment. She took a breath as if to say something, then stopped. Finally, she said; "Lighter."

He smiled "It was a burden carrying around all of that inside you."

"Yes. But I feel good about what I did tonight. I healed physically, and I am getting better mentally. There are still issues, but if you are patient with me I am confident I can overcome them."

Tony leaned forward. "I'll do anything for you. And if it means waiting even longer before we can make love I'm fine with that. "

Ziva frowned a bit. "I know that you would never hurt me physically, or force me into anything I am not ready for. But I worry that even though I know that deep down, my fear response will take over."

He reached over and took her hand. "Then we'll work through it, together. We're a team, right?"

She hooked her pinky with his. "That we are. But right now, I really feel like I need a shower, get Jake into bed and collapse early. It has been an eventful and trying day."

"Go ahead. We'll try to stay out of trouble."

She smiled at him as she exited the room, glancing quickly at the sleeping baby before disappearing down the hall.

Tony went and retrieved the mission folder from his bags. He was leaving in less than twelve hours, perhaps now would be a good time it study up on what exactly his trip to Los Angeles was about.

About eight pages in, he heard the shower turn off. Giving up on the folder, he instead went and picked up the baby. Jake barely stirred as Tony carried him down the hallway and into Ziva's room. He sat against the headboard with the sleeping baby curled tightly into his chest.

Moments later, Ziva entered wearing Tony's favorite robe and towling her wet hair. She smiled when she saw her 'guys' in bed. Dropping the towel next to the bed, she curled up against Tony's arm.

"Room for me?" She asked.

He smiled. "Always." He told her. Jake heard his Mommy and moved his head slightly, not bothering to open his eyes.

Tony chuckled. "It's all about Daddy until Mommy comes into the room." Ziva smiled and sat up as Tony moved his leg allowing her to crawl between. Laying back against his chest, she took Jake and loosened the front of her robe.

Tony moved his hand around her waist and rested it on her stomach. "May I?" He asked.

She didn't reply but nodded. Tony opened her robe exposing her right breast, As Ziva moved Jake towards her nipple Tony gently moved her breast in Jake's direction. Within seconds Jake had latched on and was drinking.

"There's our boy." He cooed at the baby. Ziva smiled and allowed her head to rest on Tony's shoulder.

"I am going to get your shirt soaked." She warned.

"It's okay, I have others." He replied, kissing the side of her head.

They sat silently watching the baby nurse for several moments. "I do not believe he will eat much since he ate a lot earlier." She pointed out.

Tony nodded. "Good. We can put him down and have some time for ourselves." He whispered.

She turned her head and looked at him. "Tired of him already?" She teased.

Tony shook his head. "Never. I just- I have to leave tomorrow. And after tonight…. I just want to be alone with you." He confessed.

She kissed his cheek but said nothing more, turning her attention back to the baby. They said nothing more for a long time until Ziva noticed that Jake wasn't nursing anymore. She removed the baby from her breast and began burping him, allowing Tony to move his arms around her.

Jake was upset that his sleep had been disturbed and decided to let them know. He cried throughout Ziva's attempts to get the air out of his tummy. Finally he let out a little belch before turning his cries into an all out scream.

Ziva moved him back to her chest. "Oh my goodness, you are really mad at Mommy." She soothed as she held him close and rubbed his belly. Finally realizing that he was back into his favorite sleep position, he abruptly stopped crying and attempted to doze off, only to be disturbed by a case of hiccups he'd given himself.

Tony and Ziva fought unsuccessfully to hide their smiles. "Well, while he's awake, I'll go get him bathed and ready for bed. " Tony said. Ziva merely nodded and leaned forward, handing Jake to him. She watched as Tony left the room and then moved against the headboard. She waited for a long while before finally sighing and pulling her robe tightly around her, tying the ties and walking into Jake's room.

Tony had just finished his bath, had him diapered and was getting him dressed when she entered the room. "How is it going?" She asked.

Tony picked Jake up and tucked him under his chin. "Fine. He was an angel." Tony leaned the baby down so Ziva could give him a kiss goodnight.

"Good night little man." Tony whispered as he laid the baby in his crib. Ziva had moved to his side as they both stared down at the sleeping boy.

"I hope he's awake before I leave tomorrow." Tony said sadly.

Ziva smiled and took his hands. "Come on. Let us get ready for bed." She walked backwards as she led him out of Jake's room back to hers. Tony stood self consciously in the doorway.

Ziva stopped. "What is wrong?"

He shuffled his feet nervously. "I- I just thought… maybe you'd be more comfortable tonight with me in the guest room. After all the memories that was stirred up-"

The look on her face caused him to stop speaking, Her face looked crushed, her eyes red rimmed and glassy. "Ziva?" He asked coming forward..

She took a step back from him. "Now that you know how weak I was you do not want to be with me-" She spoke softly as she backed away a few more steps before turning and fleeing to the bed.

"What? Oh God no- Ziva.-" Tony rushed to the opposite side of the bed where she had crawled in and scooted across so he could reach her. "Come here."

He gathered her in his arms and pulled her against his chest. As he wrapped his arms around her and enveloped her in his warmth, he could feel her tears soaking through his shirt. Tony allowed her to cry against him for what felt like forever. When he felt her calming he seized the moment to speak to her.

"Why would you think such a thing, Ziva?" He whispered to the top of her head.

She moved her head slightly. "What man would want to be with me Tony? As Vance pointed out, I am 'damaged goods'. I do not even know how I will react when I try to have sex. I may never be able to-"

Tony reached down and hooked her chin with his finger raising her eyes to meet his. "Ziva, you're talking nonsense. I've wanted you since day we've met. My desire has only gotten stronger as the years have gone by. And now- now that I've seen what a future with you is like…. I ache to be with your physically."

"Really?"

He nodded and reached down to play with the tie on her robe. "Besides, I've gotten to see the goods up close and personal… definitely worth waiting for."

She smiled and wiped her face. "Oh, you saw the goods years ago Tony when we were undercover. I was in my early twenties then. Many things have changed, especially since I was pregnant."

He chuckled. "I love every extra millimeter of you." He whispered before catching her lips in a quick kiss.

She burst into laughter. "I am glad you said millimeter instead of inches." She told him.

He still has his hand on the tie to her robe. "Can I?" He asked

Their eyes locked and she was lost in his green depths. Tony had seen her breasts exposed numerous times in the last several days. But this… this was different. This wasn't to breastfeed. This wasn't his need to feel her heartbeat. This was passion. This was sexual.

And it scared Ziva to death.

She bit her bottom lip as thoughts jumbled through her mind. Placing all of her trust in him, she nodded slightly.

He pulled the tie open gently and allowed the robe to fall open completely. Since she'd thrown the robe on after she got out of the showed, she had nothing on underneath. His breath hitched in his throat.

"My God, you are so beautiful." He leaned down to catch her lips as he placed his hand on her cheek. "I love you. My entire soul belongs to you." He whispered to her before kissing her again.

She reached up and ran a hand down his cheek to his shirt. Laying naked in Tony's arms certainly was not how she expected this evening to end, but she was going to take full advantage of it.

She tugged his shirt. "Off." She ordered.

He smiled and leaned forward a bit, pulling the shirt over his head and depositing it on the floor.

She resumed her position of laying back against his shoulder as their lips met again. His hand traced down her neck and to her chest, between the valley of her breasts where it stopped. She pulled her lips away.

"Why did you stop?" She asked.

"I don't want to force you into anything you're not ready for."

"Tony- I cannot physically-"

He shook his head. "I know you can't physically. I know the boundries." She looked at his strangely as he shrugged. "I did some reading on the internet. But that's not what I mean."

"I want to be with you Tony. " She whispered.

He kissed her again passionately before pulling away again. "And I want you to remember how good sex can be. The pleasure, the completely loss of control, the afterglow. I want it to be good for you again, not just a memory of ugliness and violence."

She stared at him for several moments before reaching down and taking his hand. She placed it on her left breast. "Show me." She whispered.

To be continued


	32. Chapter 32

**WHEW! Finally moved and settled into my new home… sort of. LOL Well, if you can ignore all the boxes piled around my living room that haven't been unpacked yet….. Anyone wanna come over and help me unpack? LOL**

**I'll admit, last Tuesday's episode really left me numb. I didn't expect the introduction to EJ to be so blatant and… in your face. ::sigh:: It completely ruined a great ep for me. I keep telling myself that the stress of moving is making me feel like my love of TIVA is unwarranted…. I had to force this chapter out. I feel like I've lost their voice. ::sigh:: Hopefully I'll find them again soon.**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 32**

Tony felt his body react immediately to Ziva's command.

He thoroughly explored her mouth as he gently fondled her left breast before switching to lavish attention on the other.

Her breath hitched as Tony continued his ministrations. She broke their impassioned kiss to catch her breath which allowed him the opportunity to trail his lips behind her ear and down her neck. She tilted her head to the side and leaned into him allowing him easier access.

Tony grinned slightly at her response but didn't stop for too long, not wanting to give her too much time to think. He moved to the side and allowed her to settled into the pillows beneath them as he his right hand wandered over her chest and stomach.

He raised his head and looked her in the eyes, seeing no fear or apprehension there. He smiled and touched her cheek tenderly. "My beautiful." He whispered.

She reached up and placed her hand on his cheek. "You make me feel that way."

He rubbed his thumb back and forth. "I'm going to keep making you feel like this, everyday, for the rest of our lives." He promised.

She smiled and raised her head again capturing his lips with her own. Tony repeated his earlier exploration with his mouth, this time dropping his head and kissing her already hypersensitive breasts.

Her body reacted immediately . She involuntarily arched into his lips as a low moan escaped from deep inside of her. Tony moved from one breast to the other causing Ziva to again arch into him. She was becoming a bit breathless as a deep ache long forgotten was awoken from it's long slumber.

She reached a free arm up and wrapped her hand in his hair, guiding his mouth to where she wanted it the most. He complied and gently took her nipple in his mouth, careful not to repeat his earlier mistake which resulted in him with milk in his mouth.

"God Tony- " She moaned Tony smiled and moved his mouth to her other breast allowing his hand to pay attention to her now abandoned breast. His mouth trailed from her breast down to her stomach and to her belly button. For the first time, Tony noticed a thin line trailing from her navel and disappearing into her patch of curls.

Tony immediately stopped his ministrations and studied it intently.

Ziva sighed loudly in frustration at being suddenly abandoned. She raised her head up from the pillows. "Tony?" She questioned breathlessly and a bit loudly.

He looked at her intently and then back to the mark on her skin. He ran his fingers over it gently, anger and sadness clouding his mood.

Ziva touched his hair to get his attention. "Tony, what is wrong?"

All of the anger at himself, Michael Rivkin, Eli David, Gibbs, Saleem… everyone who had any part for what happened in Somalia overtook him again. He pushed himself away from her and turned away partially.

Ziva was thoroughly confused. She sat up and placed her arm on his shoulder. "Tony, do not shut me out. Talk to me please."

He attempted to get his emotions under control but was slipping. His breathing became erratic and deep. The images conjured in his mind of Ziva crawling across the floor crying and begging Saleem to help her as he allowed his men to force her face down and rape her repeatedly played over and over in his brain. He forgot where he was and lashed out, punching the bedside table and causing both the lamp and alarm clock sitting on it to fall and break.

"Tony!"

Her voice brought him back to reality just as he heard the baby start to cry in the next room, the loud noise probably startling him from sleep. The room came back into focus and instead of seeing red, Ziva's frightened face appeared. He reached out to her a bit too quickly, causing her to startle and scramble back away from him.

She grabbed her robe from the floor and retreated from the room. Tony drew his knees up and dropped his head onto them.

He could hear Ziva returning with Jake. "Shh, shhh, it is okay little one." She stopped in the doorway with the baby on her shoulder looking wearily at Tony.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I didn't mean to frighten you." He swore.

Ziva didn't reply. She continued soothing the baby until he had fallen back to sleep. She left the room again without saying a word to Tony.

He sighed and swore to himself. 'You bastard, you're still ruining our lives.' He swore to Saleem, hopefully still burning in Hell's fire if you believed in such a thing.

Tony found a thread on the comforter and began playing with it praying that Ziva would return. She did minutes later, standing near the bed but as far away from him as she could.

Neither spoke for several moments. Finally, she broke the silence. "What the hell was THAT?"

He sighed. "The mark on your stomach. I thought I was okay, I thought I was handling what you shared earlier but I guess it got the better of me."

She looked confused. Tony reached out to point out what he was referring too and his heart sank. Ziva flinched and moved farther away from him. She walked away from him to her mirror, opening her robe and realizing what he was talking about.

"You mean this mark here, yes?" She asked tracing the line below her navel as she watched his reflection behind her.

He nodded, tears stinging the back of his eyes at the realization that he'd frightened her. Badly.

She looked flabbergasted as she closed her robe and tied it again. "Tony, that is not from Somalia. It is a natural thing that happens to some women when they are pregnant. It is called l-" She sighed as her emotions swirled around in her mind. "It begins with a 'L'. It will fade and disappear over time. It has nothing to do with… THAT at all."

"I'm sorry." He muttered not able to look her in the eye as she moved back to the side of the bed. He tried one more time reaching out for her. Ziva however, stepped back.

"I think-" She stopped, took a deep breath and then tried again. "I think we pushed a little too much tonight Tony." She stated quietly. "It is late. We should sleep."

His heart broke. She didn't make a move towards the bed. Tony got the hint.

"I uh…. I'm going to let you rest. I'll go sleep in Josh's room." He moved quickly from the bed and towards the door, hoping he'd hear Ziva's voice behind him telling him to stop and come back.

Risking one quick glance behind him, he saw that Ziva moved back towards her bed only after he'd gone.

'You really screwed this one up DiNozzo!' he swore to himself as he slipped into the extra room and closed the door behind him.

To Be Continued


	33. Chapter 33

**Hmmm. Not many offers to help unpack. ::sigh:: Guess I'm stuck doing it myself.**

**Without further adieu… Beware folks, the next few chapters are going to be rough….**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 33

Tony sighed as he dug his head deeper into the unfamiliar pillows. The clock on the bedside stand taunted him. In less than two hours, he'd have to get up and catch his flight to Los Angeles. The problem was, he had yet to get a minute of sleep.

His first instinct was to go across the hall and try to talk to Ziva. However, he'd decided that was a really bad idea. The look of fear and mistrust in her eyes had killed him, and forcing his way into her room would just further traumatize her.

When he'd first came into the spare room, he heard Ziva cleaning up the remnants of the mess he'd made of her bedside table. He continued to listen as her room was quiet again. He figured that she was having trouble sleeping when he heard Jake fuss for the first time. Tony was barely out of bed when he heard Ziva's door open and her bare feet in the hallway. Instead of forcing a confrontation, he had allowed Ziva to care for the crying baby.

She didn't leave Jake in his room. Tony figured that she was in his room long enough to change his diaper and had taken him with his bassinette and retreated to the safety of her bedroom.

He sighed again and moved angrily to his left side, now facing the closed door. There was less than five feet between the door to his room and Ziva's, but it might as well have been miles. 'You really screwed up this time.' he chastised himself for the millionth time tonight.

Giving up on sleep, he tossed the blankets back and turned on the bedside lamp. He glanced lazily around the room, noticing it's décor for the first time.

A few of Josh's personal items were still there, including what Tony decided had to be family photos. Tony stood and moved over to the table which held the numerous picture frames. One in particular caught his attention. It was of a young boy and two little girls. One of the girls was definitely Ziva. She still had the same eyes and smile, even after the passage of time. The children appeared to be no more than seven or eight years old. The other two had to be Josh and Eden.

Tony stared at the smiling little girl in the photo. She was so innocent and full of youthful exuberance. That little girl didn't know of betrayal and death, she knew nothing of murder, or a desert country called Somalia.

'This is what I want our little girl to be like.' He thought. Of course, that would only be if he could get Ziva to talk to him.

'No, it's not too late, we've come too far.' he swore.

He walked to the door and laid his hand against it. He was temped to reach for the knob but instead laid his ear against it and listened. He could barely hear Ziva's voice talking softly. Glancing at the time, he surmised she was breastfeeding Jake.

Sighing again, he crawled back into bed and pulled the blankets up to his chin. He begged for sleep to come. He had a long morning ahead of him.

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Across the hall Ziva settled uncomfortably into her pillows as she cuddled Jake close to her. He was fed and burped, but fighting sleep.

"I know little one. You can sense some tension, yes? Mommy and Daddy just had a misunderstanding."

Jake focused his dark eyes on his Mommy as if he understood every word she was saying.

"But you do not have to worry. It may be bad for a while, but in the long run, it will be for the best. I promise."

The baby yawned and stretched his arm over his head, then brought it back down. Ziva smiled and stuck her finger out, allowing Jake to seek it out and grab hold. She bent down and kissed him on the forehead.

"You are so special Jacob…. Mommy's little miracle. You are not even two weeks old and you have managed to completely capture my heart. Mommy loves you so much." She whispered as his eyes started to drift closed.

She waited for a few minutes after the baby had dozed off before she stood and placed him in the bassinette. Satisfied that he was going to stay asleep for a while, she looked around the room, almost unsure what to do with herself.

She needed sleep, that was obvious. Climbing back into bed, she sighed deeply as sleep refused to come.

She just couldn't get comfortable, no matter what position she moved to. 'You have gotten used to having Tony with you.' she thought to herself.

She hadn't meant to send Tony from her room. It was an impulsive response to his outburst. She should have gone to him hours ago, but wasn't sure how to approach him.

Was he angry at her for sending him away? She was sure he didn't understand the full reason for it. She changed positions in bed again, this time pulling Tony's pillows to her so she could inhale his scent.

It did nothing but make her miss him more. 'This is ridiculous, he is a few feet away!'

Finally giving up, she threw the blankets back and quietly went across the hall. Opening the guest room door, she could barely make out Tony's form in the darkness. She stood quietly trying to gauge if he was awake.

"Ziva?" She heard him call. She moved quickly towards the bed and found his hand. Without saying a word, she pulled him out of the guest room and led him back into her room.

Just as quietly, she returned to her bed and waited for him to join her. He took the hint, relief washing over him. Climbing into his side, his body instantly relaxed as he sleep began to wash over him. He smiled openly as Ziva cuddled against his chest and immediately closed her eyes.

To Be Continued


	34. Chapter 34

**Mmmm…. Hamburger Helper cheesy hash browns. Yuuummmyyyy…..**

**Fasten your seatbelts folks…**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 34

Tony slowly regained consciousness as the smell of food cooking wafted into the bedroom. Moaning, he forced one eye open to glance at the clock.

It was missing… because he had knocked it on the floor last night and smashed it. With a groan, he sat up and noticed that not only was Ziva missing, so was Jake and his bassinette.

Wiping his face he wandered into the bathroom knowing that Ziva wouldn't have allowed him to oversleep when he had a flight to catch. Once finished, he took a deep breath readying himself for the impending conversation he knew they needed to have.

He wandered into the kitchen, his movement grabbing Ziva's attention as she stood at the stove. She turned slightly not saying anything.

"Bacon?" He asked, trying to break the ice.

"Turkey." She replied softly.

"Turkey isn't bacon." He attempted to joke.

She didn't take the bait. "Breastfeeding. It is better for the baby." She reminded.

Tony sighed inwardly. She appeared to have shut down before his eyes. Glancing at the clock he noted that he had less than two hours before having to leave for the airport.

"Ziva-"

She cut him off. "Jake is due to eat in the next few minutes. I thought maybe you would like to feed him one more time before you go, yes?" She asked.

He nodded and smiled warily. She reached into the fridge and pulled out a bottle of breast milk, setting the bottle warmer and placing the bottle inside.

Tony began to move over the wake the baby. "I wasn't sure you would let me near him." He stated cautiously.

Ziva turned. "Tony." He turned back towards her. "I would never keep Jake away from you. Last night… I know that you would never hurt me, or Jake. It is not about that." She said.

He looked at the floor momentarily allowing her words to sink in. "Then what exactly is it about?"

She was silent for a moment but turned back towards the counter when the bottle warmer popped off. "Jake first, then we will talk."

Tony was confused but followed her lead. Walking to the bassinette, he smiled as his gaze was met with a miniature set of Ziva's eyes. "Hey big guy, time for chow." He scooped the infant up into his arms and pulled him close to his face inhaling his scent.

"Daddy doesn't want to leave today Jake. I'm going to miss you." Ziva watched quietly from the kitchen. She turned to remove the bacon from the pan and add the eggs. Once they were cooking, she disappeared down the hall and reappeared just as quickly. Tony turned when he noticed her messing with his waiting bags.

"Everything okay?" He asked.

"Fine." She replied. Walking into the kitchen she grabbed the baby's breakfast, testing it on her wrist before handing it to Tony.

"Why don't I believe her Jake?" He asked the baby knowing full well that Ziva could hear him.

She fiddled with the eggs for a few moments before turning around. "Not around the baby Tony." She warned.

That response drew his attention. The exhaustion from his sleepless night came crashing down on him as he focused all of his attention on the small baby in his arms. He wanted to remember every curve of the baby's face, every nuance in the expressions he sometimes bore, the toothless smiles that appeared while he slept.

Jake took the bottle immediately and stared up at Tony while he drank. If Tony didn't know better, he would have thought that the baby understood that Daddy was leaving for a period of time and was trying to remember his face as well.

"You are such a good boy. Look at you eating so good for your Daddy. Keep eating like this and you'll grow up big and strong."

Jake continued to stare up at him. The minute Tony would stop talking Jake would stop drinking.

"Breakfast is ready." Ziva called from the kitchen. She watched Tony interact with the baby for a few moments.

"Tony, do not let him drink too much." She warned.

Tony shrugged and glanced over to her. "I think he's about done anyway. What's the worse that can happen, if he's hungry he's hungry." He said.

He put the bottle on the end table next to him and began to lift the baby to his shoulder. Jake was barely there when he heard the baby grunt and suddenly felt the feeling of warm liquid running down his arm.

"Ugh!" Tony called as he watched Jake's breakfast run down his arm and shirt.

"That is the worst that can happen." Ziva stated matter of factly as she came over and took Jake from Tony.

"Did you make a little piggy of yourself? Huh?" She asked Jake as she walked him to his bedroom to change his clothes.

Tony glanced at the mess he was wearing. He stood carefully and went down the hallway. "I'm going to jump in the shower before I eat."

Ziva snorted as she pulled Jake's clean shirt over his head. "Please do." She commented.

Once in the shower, Tony's exhaustion really set over him. He was hoping the warm water would wake him up. Instead, it seemed to deepen his need for sleep.

Once he was clean and changed into his travel clothes, he went back to the kitchen where Ziva was dishing out their now only warm breakfast.

Tony took the plate from her silently and moved to the table. He grimaced at his first bite of turkey bacon but bit back any further comments. Ziva took her seat and began eating.

Halfway through their meal, Tony couldn't take the silence any longer. "Ziva, about last night-" He began.

She shook her head. "Tony…" She started and then stopped. Summoning up her courage, she started again.

"Tony, I have loved you for so long, I cannot remember a time when I did not love you. Even though we have taken the long road to get here, I truly feel like we are capable of making something magical happen between us. Earlier tonight, despite all the misgivings in my head, I was able and willing to go as far as you were going to take us. I did not think I was capable of that yet. It is all you. You have quickly become so much a part of me that I do not know where I end and you begin."

She stopped and smiled slightly when she noticed his bright smile. She reached out and touched his cheek gently before reaching down and taking his hand.

"I'm sorry that I reacted the way that I did. I didn't mean to frighten you." He said softly.

She shook her head and broke eye contact. "You did not frighten me Tony. Well, you did, but only momentarily. I know your outburst was not directed at me, but at what happened to me. Tony, you bottled up your emotions because you think that is what I need. You see how that worked out. I need you to be honest with me… I need you to open up to me about what you are feeling."

Tony was quiet for several moments as he began to play with their joined hands. Finally, he shook his head slightly. "You don't need to hear what's rattling around in my brain."

She sighed and dropped his hand. "No Tony, you are wrong. I do need to hear what is going on in your mind. And if you are unwilling to share that with me then-" She stopped and Tony's heart clenched when he saw her eyes become glassy with tears.

"Then what?" He asked in a whisper.

She struggled with her words before she was able to mutter, "Then it is best that we end this now."

To be continued


	35. Chapter 35

**Thanks so much to everyone who is reading, commenting, 'story alerting' and sending me messages. It's so appreciated to know that everyone is still enjoying this story.**

**This chapter has been the hardest to write out of all of them. And yes, Ziva is particularly nasty and vile here. I KNOW that. There is a reason. Just trust me on this… some of you know me from the CBS Tiva board and know that no matter how worked up or upset I may get over spoilers/storylines, I am first and foremost a TIVA fan at heart.**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 35

"Then it is best that we end this now."

Bile immediately rose in Tony's throat, and it wasn't from the turkey bacon. He angrily dropped his fork causing a loud clatter against his plate. Jake jumped in his sleep which caused Ziva to get up and check on him in the bassinette. Thankfully, he didn't awaken.

She let him be and turned back to face Tony, trying to fight back the tears that were stinging the back of her eyes. She had to do this. She had to be strong and stand her ground. No matter how much this pained her to do this, it HAD to be done, before it was too late.

Tony's eyes held fire, the same fire she had witnessed last night.

"So what, I lost my temper one time and that's it, you're kicking me to the curb?" He asked angrily.

She shook her head and moved back to her seat across from Tony. "No, that is not it at all. Tony-" She reached out and took his hand, playing with his fingers as she tried to put her thoughts into words. "You obviously have thoughts and feelings inside of you that you are bottling up. I need you to share those with me."

He angrily pulled his hand away causing her to jump slightly. "Ziva, you have enough crap you're dealing with. You don't need me adding to it."

She shook her head, her voice pleading with him to understand. "No Tony, you are wrong. I do need you to add to it. For this- us to work, I need you to open up to me. When I said I want to be with you, I meant YOU, as in ALL of you. I need to know what you are thinking and feeling so we can deal with it together."

He left the table and began pacing the room. "Ziva, I've never been someone to just open up about stuff…" He stopped by the baby and stared down at the small peaceful form oblivious to the turmoil brewing around him.

"I know Tony. Neither have I. And look where I ended up because of it. I was so afraid to love and trust, and then I went overboard trying to find it in all the wrong places. It did not work out so well for me. I cannot sit by and watch that happen to you."

"So what, you think I'm going to go screw some woman I just met because I don't want to open up to you?" He asked bitterly.

He regretted the words the moment they left his mouth. He watched as she bristled, her dark eyes widening in anger.

She was eerily silent for several moments, taking deep breaths to calm herself. After what felt like an eternity, she stood and walked to Tony, leaning almost into his face.

"You have no right." She spat.

"No right? What the hell do you mean? Ziva, you're throwing me out of your life because I didn't want to burden you with my thought about Somalia. I don't understand this-" Frustrated, he rubbed his hand through his hair before glancing up at the ceiling begging for some sort of guidance.

She shook her head again. "No Tony, this is not just about Somalia. This is about everything, our whole relationship, from day one. Every time I have tried to get you to open up to me you thrown up some sort of a wall, or you joke. You have even laughed IN MY FACE. How do you think that made me feel?"

"I have never laughed in your face-" He began.

She looked at him incredulously. "The day I overheard you on the phone with Jeanne, when I found out you were moving in with her."

He sighed. "I wasn't intentionally laughing AT you Ziva. I was-"

"Protecting yourself from what you were feeling. Your fears. Now you see my point."

He looked ready to surrender to her point of view when suddenly the mask went into place again. "No no no. Don't do that. Don't try to make it seem like I am the only one who does that. I tried to get you to open up to me after you were almost shot by that serial killer but instead you chose to crawl into bed with Michael Locke. What the hell was THAT Ziva, huh?"

She didn't back down. "That was an emotionally damaged woman trying to spare the people she loved. It was not about lust or attraction Tony. It was comfort sex, nothing more."

He snorted. "Did it help?"

She shrugged. "I slept for the first time in days that night. But after, the nightmares were still there. I ended out not only hurting the people I love but Michael too. I did not mean for that to happen."

He shrugged and pointed to himself with both hands. "But yet I'm the bad guy."

"No Tony. You are not the bad guy. We have both made mistakes in the past. I have learned, and tried to grow from them. I am asking you to give yourself the chance to do the same."

He looked at her incredulously. He pointed angrily across the room at the bassinette where Jacob slept. "Stepping forward and raising a kid that's even mine isn't grown enough for you Ziva?"

She immediately stopped and stepped back from him. Out of everything he could have said, that hurt her the worst. "So despite everything you have said and promised, it does both you that Jake is not yours?"

"No Ziva, that's not what I meant." He pleaded.

She moved away from him and over towards the baby. "How does it make you feel that the baby you're allowing to call you Daddy looks just like the man that shot Kate? Ari's blood is in Jacob's veins Tony. That has to bother you on some level."

Tony was silent, refusing the take the bait. He knew she was baiting him. But he wouldn't do it, he wouldn't unload on her.

"Let us think of a hypothetical Tony. What if when Saleem dragged me into the room in Somalia and pulled that hood off of my head, what if my belly was rounded with a child that was not yours? What if you dragged me out of the desert and I was carrying the child of one of the men who raped me?"

His face was reddening in anger. She knew she was getting to him. "Or what if it was Michael's? I slept with him the night before he died. I could have easily been pregnant before I even marched into Saleem's camp and not known."

"Ziva stop." He commanded quietly.

"Stop what Tony? This is hypothetical, yes? It could very well have happened. " She reminded him.

"I wouldn't-"

"You would not have what Tony? You would not have cared? Bullshit!" She said angrily.

"What do you want me to do here Ziva? Do you want me to yell, scream, break furniture?" He shouted before turning away from her to calm himself.

"No Tony. I want you to just open up to me." She said quietly.

He shook his head. "So, you think making me angry is the way to ensure that happens?" He asked sarcastically.

She snorted and threw her head back. "How about this. I will even start. Do you know how angry I felt when you were sneaking behind my back and investigating me when Michael was here? I felt so betrayed, and unwanted. I had never been that angry in my life." She moved across the room quickly and stood in front of him, practically raising herself up on her tiptoes so she was almost nose to nose with him. "Do you know what I did to get back at you?"

'What?" He asked softly.

"I invited Michael over that night Tony. I seduced him to spite you. I threw him down in my bed and rode him as hard as I could without hurting myself. And it was because of you, to SPITE you. He fell asleep in MY bed with a smug smile on his face. And I laid there, sick to my stomach at what I had done, trying to justify that I had to be wrong, that you would NEVER betray me like that. And I prayed you would never find out what I had done with Michael."

She pulled back from him and truly looked at him. Her eyes were glassy with tears she was trying unsuccessfully to fight off. Very quietly she whispered, "So now you know."

Tony's thoughts and emotions were whirling like a funnel could. He suddenly felt something slipping away from him. He didn't know what it was exactly, but he knew it was very important and he couldn't lose it, no matter what.

He reached out and quickly wrapped his arms around Ziva and pulled her roughly to his chest. He could feel her shaking as she cried against him. He felt her relax and thought he was going to escape this unpleasantness when she suddenly stiffened and pulled away.

"No Tony. Not this time. Jake and I do not just need that part of you that you are willing to give. We need you, ALL of you. I need to be able trust that you will open up to me. Without that, this will never last, and it will be worse than ever before with Jacob involved. I cannot… will not… allow that to happen to him. I do not want him looking back on his life and reflecting at how emotionally damaged his parents were."

She wiped her eyes quickly and went to the bassinette, scooping the sleeping baby into her arms and holding him protectively against her chest.

"You have a plane to catch." she said resolutely.

Before Tony could say anything further, she spun on her heel and disappeared down the hallway with the baby. He heard her bedroom door close and then lock.

Angrily, he grabbed his bags from the floor and stomped out the door, slamming it closed behind him.

To be continued.


	36. Chapter 36

**Wow, almost 400 reviews….. I am speechless…**

**I couldn't just leave them like I did in the last chapter. LOL Just a small chapter, but something to hold us over….**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 36

Tony sat quietly in the passenger side of the car the LA office had sent to meet him at the airport. He pulled out his cell phone, desperate to see a missed call.

Nothing.

He'd boarded the plane, and the flight attendants had been correct in their immediate assumption that he just wanted to be left alone. He slammed his carry on into the overhead compartment so loudly that a woman three seats back gasped.

He'd tried to sleep during the flight, but it eluded him. He settled on staring out the window and replaying this morning over in his mind.

Now, he was thousands of miles away from the two most important people in his life. He felt totally and completely alone, as if he was the only person left on the planet.

"Hetty wanted me to bring you straight to the office. Leave your suitcase in the car. I'll drive you to your hotel later." Agent G Callan explained to him as they pulled up to a building with numerous "Condemned building" signs on it.

Tony didn't say anything, he just nodded slightly and sighed. Callan looked at him out of the corner of his eye but then shrugged and exited the car. Tony grabbed his carry on and followed him.

After being introduced to everyone, Callan's partner Sam showed Tony where he would be working for the next two weeks. Tony thanked him and sat down quietly observing the agents around him.

Tony watched with interest and Agent Kensi Blye bantered back and forth with her partner Marty Deeks. The banter was eerily familiar and tugged at Tony's heart until it hurt.

Breaking from his reverie, he unzipped his carry on and began removing his files. Suddenly, a small blue item caught his attention. He wrapped his fingers around the soft item and lifted it out, recognizing it immediately as one of Jake's infant hats that he wore. It was, in fact, the one he wore to his doctor's appointment.

Tony felt his heart clench as his eyes became a bit blurry. Lifting it out closer, he studied it. He brought it to his face and inhaled it's scent. It smelled of Jake. Tony breathed the scent in deeply trying to force it into his memory.

He looked up and caught the other four agents staring at him. He threw a famous "DiNozzo grin" at them and shrugged. "It's my son's. " He explained.

Callan looked surprised. "Your son is small enough to wear that tiny hat? What are you going here?"

Tony shook his head. "It's a long, complicated story. He's two weeks old. It was hard to leave him." He confessed.

Deeks stood and moved over to his side. "Do you have a picture?"

Tony thought for a moment, cursing the fact that he meant to grab one this morning before he left and had forgotten.

'Ziva sent one to you days ago.' He remembered.

He flipped open his phone and found the photo, showing it proudly to Deeks. "Wow, he's a cute kid!"

Deeks passed the phone around so the entire team could see. They all agreed that Jake was adorable. Tony had the idea that none of these people knew one baby from another. However, he took the compliments in stride.

He settled back down and began working, taking several opportunities to stop and glance at the hat. 'That's what Ziva was doing with your bags this morning.' He realized.

Tony and the team kicked around ideas and theories for a while. Finally, Hetty reappeared to get a sit rep. She was satisfied with the plan they presented to her. She instructed Callan to take Tony to his hotel.

Once settled in his room, Tony stripped down to his boxers and threw on a tee shirt. He considered turning on the television but decided against it.

Instead, he curled up on the bed, missing Ziva's warmth next to him. He pulled Jake's hat close to him, trying to imagine the baby and Ziva were cuddled into the strange bed with him.

The ringing of his cell phone on the bedside table startled him. He grabbed it quickly, immediate relief washing over him when he saw Ziva's number displayed.

"Hello-" He answered cautiously.

Her voice paused on the other end before she spoke. "I am putting Jake down for the night. I thought you would like to say 'Goodnight'."

Tony smiled, his eyes stinging with tears. "Yeah, I would like that a lot."

He heard her fumbling momentarily with the phone before her voice came from far away. "I have you on speaker next to him in his crib."

"Jake, hey Jake, it's Daddy. I miss you. I wish I was there tucking you in buddy."

Ziva listened quietly as she leaned over the crib. Before she could stop herself, tears started streaming down her face, not for the first time today.

"Jake, Daddy will be home really soon. You're the man of the house until I get back. Make sure you take good care of Mommy. And remember, no matter what, Daddy loves you so much.."

Ziva wiped her face before reaching down and picking up the phone, taking it off speaker. "He is asleep." She said quietly as she left his room.

Tony wasn't sure what else to say. He knew what he wanted to say, but also wished he was there with her face to face.

"Ziva-" He began.

"I am here." She said quietly.

"I… I miss you two."

Ziva smiled gently. "We miss you too."

"I… I heard what you said this morning." He began.

She sat on the sofa and shook her head gently, as if he could see her. "No Tony. Not like this." She said.

His spirit fell as he frowned into the phone. "Okay." He replied.

They were quiet for several moments.

"Tony, I have to get some sleep. I am exhausted."

"Okay, have a good night."

"Tony?"

"Yes?"

"I love you." She closed her phone, disconnecting the call.

Tony smiled, relief washing over him. He placed his phone next to Jake's hat on the opposite pillow. As tired as he was, he had a long night of thinking ahead of him.

To be continued


	37. Chapter 37

**Hmmm….. I have nothing witty (or not so much) to say. It's been a rough week, we'll just leave it at that.**

**Good news is, I actually have a couple of chapters written ahead for a change.**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 37

Ziva's phone call had recharged Tony's spirit. He had sat. staring at his phone with a goofy smile on his face for several moments. Glancing at the clock, he realized that it was still early in LA.

Jumping from the bed, he tossed on a pair of jeans, grabbed his phone, wallet and hotel key and decided to go for a walk. His mind began replaying their fight this morning. After sorting through it all, he realized she was right. He did have a tendency to bury his feelings deep, instead allowing Ziva to share her innermost demons while he listened sympathetically.

It had been harder than he ever imagined just admitting to her how he felt. It truly had been a battle in his mind, his fear or rejection versus never having a chance with Ziva. If it hadn't been for Eden and Josh, he would still probably be sitting in a bar, picking up strange women or calling Palmer for a ride home… or both.

He shoved his hands in his pocket. Joking his way out of an intense emotional situation had suited him well his entire life. It had helped him hide his true feelings for Ziva for years.

He stopped walking suddenly. Noticing a bench near by, he moved over and plopped into it.

'If you hadn't been hiding your true feelings years ago she may have never ended up in Somalia.' He chastised.

It wasn't the first time he blamed himself. He kicked himself dozens of times over for not calling or writing to her the months they were separated and he was assigned as an agent afloat. But after years of hiding, it was easier to joke and try to forget then face up to the fact that he'd fallen hard for her.

He'd kicked himself again for not stopping her the night she was leaving the office and going back to Israel for a long weekend. She'd seen Rivkin there, although he now knew that wasn't her full purpose of going. If he had stopped her, begged her not to go…..

He sighed heavily and rubbed his hand through his hair. Looking up he noticed a bookstore down the street.. He rose slowly to his feet and continued walking.

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On the other side of the country, Ziva sighed at the sound of the screaming infant streaming through the baby monitor.

Tossing back the covers, she walked quickly into Jake's room. Exhaustion overtook her as she stumbled over her own feet briefly before reaching his crib.

"Hey hey hey. What is wrong? Huh?" She said in her quiet 'Mommy' tone as she lifted him into her arms.

Jake continued fussing, though not as loudly. It didn't take long for her to realize the problem. Scrunching up her nose, she sighed again. "Jake, I just changed you not even an hour ago." She placed him on the changing table and undid the tapes on his diaper. Grabbing a handful of wipes and a clean diaper, she made quick work of getting the stinky baby clean again.

The moment Jake realized he was being changed he stopped fussing and studied his Mommy closely. Ziva finished with the baby and picked him up, smiling slightly at the expression on Jake's face.

"I guess this means you are not ready to sleep yet, yes? Okay, how about you come in and sit with Mommy for a while?"

She cuddled Jake against her and began walking towards the living room. She was barely to her favorite chair when Jake was grunting and rooting his face around her breast.

"You just ate not that long ago!" Ziva protested, but bared her breast for the baby who immediately latched on and began sucking hungrily.

"Before you were born, Mommy read every book she could get her hands on. Some said you should eat every two hours, others every three, some said four. But you just eat when you want to. You are already throwing Mommy off balance and you are not even three weeks old yet."

Jake ignored what she was saying and continued to eat, gurgling and grunting as he drank. Ziva smiled and settled her head on the back of her chair. Jake started losing interest in what he was doing causing Ziva to tickle his cheek with her finger. His eyes immediately opened wider and his sucking resumed again.

Ziva took Jake's hand in hers causing him to wrap his hand around her thumb. She smiled and dipped her had down, bringing the baby's little fingers to her lips and kissing them.

"Oh Jacob, you have changed my life so much. I did not think I could ever feel this much love for anyone. Just ten years ago I did not think this was ever a possibility for me. You have brought so much to my life without even knowing or understanding."

She continued to stare down and their joined hands for a long while. Ziva tucked her pinky into Jake's mouth breaking his hold on her breast. She brought him up and began burping him. Jake fussed and fought against it but finally belched twice. Ziva smiled.

"So stubborn." She whispered as the baby settled against her shoulder and began to sleep. Instead of putting him down, Ziva rocked him gently as she thought about this morning.

'You have missed your Daddy today. I did too. But he will be home soon. And no matter what happens, Mommy will make sure you get to spend time with him. You have only been breathing air for two and a half weeks and you have already had two Daddies, and witnessed Mommy find and lose the love of her life. What else could I possibly have in store for you?"

Jake jumped slightly in his sleep but nestled back against Ziva's shoulder, his small hand tucked up to his chin.

"Do not worry Jake. Mommy has seen all the horrors of the world. I will protect you from all of them." she promised.

She quietly rocked him for several more minutes before being satisfied that he was going to sleep for a bit of time. She quietly took him back to his room and settled him into his crib. She wearily climbed back into her own bed, pulling the pillows that still had Tony's scent close to her.

Sleep finally overtook her but not before several tears dripped onto the pillows.

To Be Continued


	38. Chapter 38

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 38

Tony stared wearily at the computer display in front of him, kicking himself for staying awake so late last night. Fighting jet lag he should have gone to sleep, but instead he decided to go through the items he'd purchased at the bookstore.

He had everything from books for men when their wives were expecting a baby to books on the first few months of life. There was even a DVD showing a live childbirth included with one of the books. He'd gone down to the business center of the hotel and realizing he was alone, put on a pair of headphones and popped the DVD into the computer.

He was sorry that he did. It certainly wasn't anything as romantic or easy as they depicted on movies or TV. By the time the baby's head had started to crown Tony was clenching his teeth and had his legs squeezed together.

'Ziva did **THAT**?' he thought to himself. He continued to watch in horror as the wet, squishy baby was grabbed by the doctor, all discolored and gooey, and then passed to a nurse once the cord was cut. The baby's blood curdling screams did nothing to ease Tony's queasiness.

Having seen enough, he shut off the DVD and had wandered back to his room. Instead, he opened a book about a baby's first six months of life and began reading. His eyes had started drifting closed. Glancing at the clock, he was surprised that it read 11:13pm. It was 2:13am in Washington right now. No wonder his eyes were closing.

He dropped the books on the floor by the bed and climbed deep under the covers. A good night's sleep would help clear his mind and plan exactly how he was going to make this right with Ziva.

However, sleep was his enemy. He'd woken up a couple of times thinking he heard Jake crying, only to realize to his disappointment that Jake was nowhere near him. At least twice he'd woken up reaching out for Ziva, and woken up when she wasn't in bed with him.

And once, he'd woken up after having the most erotic dream he'd had in years. Ziva was hovering above him, naked and smiling as she slowly rode him, doing things to his body he was sure was illegal in at least ten Midwest States. He rolled them over quickly, trapping Ziva beneath him and delving into her depths again, bring the most delicious sound from her lips he'd ever heard.

It was a race as to who would topple first. Ziva's nude body was covered with a thin layer of sweat which brought out even more curl in her hair that was fanned out on the candle lit bed. Tony felt her muscles clench around him as she climaxed dragging him over the cliff with her.

He moaned her name loudly as he emptied into her…. Which must have been what woke him up. Alone, in his hotel room, covered in sweat and rock hard.

It had taken a long time and several deep breathing exercises before his body began to calm down enough for him to even be able to change positions in bed and not hurt himself. So, here he was now, several hours later, confused, exhausted, and frustrated.

They took a late lunch which gave Tony the opportunity to test the waters. He sent one quick text message.

**_You are right_**

He waited a long while, even joining Sam as he watched Kensi and Callan bust Deeks' chops. His phone chirped, causing him to jump.

**_I miss you. I could not sleep last night._**

**_Me either…. I need to talk to you._**

**_Call tonight when you are in your room if it is not too late._**

**_I will. I love you and miss you. Kiss Jake for me._**

**_I will. I love you too. We miss you so much._**

Tony's heart clenched in his chest. 'We're going to be okay.' He thought to himself and rejoiced.

By dinnertime, Tony was really dragging. Realizing that he wasn't going to make it back to his hotel room anytime soon, he stole a few moments and found a private spot outside.

He hit Ziva's number on his speed dial and waited. "Tony?" Her groggy voice answered.

"Were you sleeping? I'm sorry."

"It is okay. I am glad you called. I was just taking a quick nap while Jake is sleeping. How is Los Angeles?"

"Lonely." Came his quick reply.

He imagined her smiling during her momentary pause. "I miss you. I cannot sleep without you here."

"Me either. Although being away from you gave me some pretty interesting dreams."

She definitely smiled now. "Oh really? Care to share?"

He laughed. "Not where anyone can hear me."

He turned serious for a moment. "Ziva, I'm sorry about losing my temper, and the table."

"Tony-" She began.

"No, let me finish. As much as it pains me to admit it. You're right. I use this invisible mask to protect myself. Every woman that I've cared about has left me in one way or another. It's easier to protect my heart than to bare it and let is get stomped on again."

"Tony, I cannot promise that everyday will be perfect. We will fight and disagree. But I am not going anywhere. I am not going to leave you. I will not keep Jacob from you."

"You grabbed Jake and walked away from me yesterday. You scared me to death."

"I was protecting myself. It took everything in my power not to just pull you in my arms and apologize. I could not break down in front of you. I used Jake as a shield to protect me from you. I did not even realize I had done it until you were gone. I am sorry."

"I'm sorry too. I wish I was there and could touch you."

"Soon… we will be together soon. Then we can talk, yes?"

"Definitely."

Tony's heart clenched when he heard her sniffle. "Ziva, please baby don't cry."

"I just- I thought I lost you…." She confessed.

"Never. You're stuck with me forever kid."

She smiled. "I think I can handle that."

"I've got to get back to work. I'm not sure if I'll get to call later."

"It is okay. Jake has been cranky all day. Hopefully he will sleep well tonight."

"Kiss him goodnight for me. I love you."

"I love you too Tony. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

He continued listening into the phone until he was sure she'd disconnected. He flipped the phone closed and smiled.

Tony hurried back to his desk suddenly reinvigorated. After a few more hours Hetty announced it was time to retire for the night.

The entire team in front of her had been putting in extremely long hours leading into this op. Hetty announced for everyone to break for the weekend and to be back bright and early Monday morning.

Tony immediately sprung to his feet. It was late Friday night, he had 48 hours free. There was only one place he wanted to be.

Grabbing his belongings, he asked Callan for a ride to the airport.

To Be Continued


	39. Chapter 39

**One more little piece before the work week starts…..**

**Again, I don't own these characters. Shane Brennon and company do… but what the hell they're doing to them is beyond me.**

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"Just One More" Chapter 39

"I just- I just don't understand." Jimmy Palmer repeated yet again.

Ziva sat across from him watching closely as he fed Jacob a bottle. "What is there not to understand? Vance and Gibbs assigned Tony to work the mission from Los Angeles. He had to go." Ziva explained again.

Palmer shook his head. "Not that. I just…. never mind." He sighed putting his attention back on Jake.

Ziva's brow furrowed together but she did not say anything more. She watched as Palmer put the empty bottle down and expertly moved Jake to his shoulder and began burping him. Ziva was surprised.

"You are very good with him." She commented.

Palmer nodded. "I've been told I have 'the touch'. I used to get stuck babysitting every little cousin I had. I got used to being around babies."

Ziva smiled. "Well I appreciate the extra set of hands. And the breakfast you brought over. It was very nice of you. Thank you."

Palmer smiled shyly and concentrated on the baby on his shoulder. Ziva had just bit into another cinnamon roll when Jake belched extremely loudly bringing a laugh from her and Palmer.

"I see Tony is teaching him a thing or two." Palmer said causing Ziva to smile. She put the pastry down on her plate and shook her head.

"Tony did not have to teach him that. Jake was born with that special _talent_."

Palmer stood and moved the baby over to his bassinette, laying him down gently and returning to his seat.

Ziva studied him for a few moments before leaning forward and resting her arms on her knees. "Jimmy, as nice as it is to have you come for a visit, why do I sense there is more to it than that?"

Palmer sighed. "I uh… I was thinking about what you told us the other night… about Somalia. I didn't say much that night.-"

"It is okay. My sharing part of what happened in Somalia was not to gain sympathy, or ask for opinions. It was about unburdening myself in order to continue to heal. It was long overdue."

Ziva continued to stare at Palmer and noticed that he wasn't quite making eye contact with her. "But, there is something else?"

Palmer nodded. "I wanted to check on Tony. I mean, I knew he would be gone, but I thought you would know better than anyone-"

Ziva smiled. "You are a good friend Jimmy. Tony is okay. We have some things to work out, but I am confident that we will be able to once he is home."

Jimmy nodded. A small knock at the door interrupted their conversation. Ziva's brows furrowed. She wasn't expecting any company this morning, let alone two unexpected visitors.

She opened the door and her eyes widened, seeing Tony there with a smile on his face. The moment their eyes met Tony rushed forward and grabbed Ziva tightly into his arms, practically lifting her off the floor and burying his face in her hair.

They didn't speak at all… there was no need. Ziva's arms had wrapped around his head as she held him tightly.

"I can't stand being away from you-" Tony murmured into her hair.

Tony has began to tremble causing Ziva to hold him tighter and forgetting her guest in the room. "It is okay Tony. I have got you."

Palmer noticed immediately that something extremely important was happening between his friends. He stood and began moving quietly towards the still open door.

Ziva noticed his movement and raised her eyes far enough to meet his. He nodded and smiled gently at her. She nodded a gentle 'thank you' to him and buried her face in Tony's chest again.

"What are you doing here Tony?" She asked softly.

"Weekend off. I have to go back tomorrow." He murmured sadly.

"Then we will have to make the most of today, yes?" She asked.

He pulled away and nodded. He saw movement in the bassinette and smiled, letting go of Ziva long enough to walk over and scoop Jake in his arms.

"Hey little man. Daddy missed you too."

"Tony, he just ate." Ziva warned as she closed the door and locked it.

Tony shrugged. He brought Jake close to his face and rubbed his cheek against the baby smooth skin. He stared at the baby as if he hadn't seen him for weeks, let alone one night.

Ziva watched quietly. She walked over and took Tony by the hand, leading him towards her bedroom. She crawled into her spot on the bed allowing Tony plenty of room settle in.

"You look tired, yes?"

He nodded as he smiled down at the baby in his arms, laying down gently and trying not to disturb Jake too much.

"I didn't sleep well the last two nights, plus the red eye flight. I am exhausted."

Ziva moved to her side and patted the bed. Tony took her cue and laid Jake between them, turning on his side so they faced each other over the baby.

She reached over and rustled his hair. "Sleep for a while Tony. I will wake you in a couple of hours."

"But-"

She put a finger on his mouth. "Your visit will do no good if you are falling asleep the whole time you are here." She insisted.

"Will you stay?"

She nodded. "I am not going anywhere."

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Leroy Jethro Gibbs swept another pile of sawdust as he heard his front door open and close.

He was used to it. That door and the basement steps behind him had witnessed many heart to heart conversations over the years. Gibbs had even gotten to know the sounds of people's footsteps, able to identify who his visitor was before he even saw them.

These footsteps were not familiar though. Gibbs watched cautiously as a head peeked around the corner of his laundry room.

"Palmer?" He asked surprised.

Jimmy waved slightly as he came downstairs. "Uh yeah, sorry to intrude. It's just… we've got to talk."

Gibbs sighed and wished it wasn't so early in the morning. He had a feeling that he was going to need a lot of bourbon today.


	40. Chapter 40

**Wow, thanks again for all the reviews! Don't get too spoiled by getting so many chapters in a day. LOL My muse was happy last weekend… but she's been very busy this week so I'm not sure how cooperative she's going to be. Plus… she really needs to go grocery shopping. LOL**

**Wow, 40 chapters…. and I don't think this monster is anywhere near done.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 40**

Tony slowly regained consciousness and tightened his muscles before stretching while forcing his eyes open.

He was greeted with two small brown eyes staring back him. He smiled over at the baby who was resting against Ziva's shoulder.

Tony smiled. The sight of Ziva holding Jacob always caused his heart to melt a bit. It seemed that now, as he and Ziva explored their connection even more, watching her interact with their son made his heart skip a beat.

Tony sat up and leaned over to Jake kissing the top of his head. "Hey little man." Ziva smiled down at the two of them and used her free hand to try and tame Tony's hair.

"Your hair is sticking up." She advised.

Tony smiled at the memory. "Like a porcuPINE?" He asked with emphasis on the word.

She grinned as her face blushed slightly. "Yes well, it is even worse now."

Tony shrugged and continued to watch Jake stare at him. "What's the matter Jake, don't like Daddy's crazy hair?"

Jake blinked and yawned, stretching his small hands and arms in almost the same fashion Tony had a few moments before.

Ziva shook her head. "He napped, had his diaper changed, nursed again, and is now ready for another nap." She told him.

Tony rubbed Jake's downy hair with a smile. "Yeah, you have it rough little man. You sleep all the time, have someone else change your clothes for you. You get to see Mommy's bare breasts on demand. I wish I had a life as good as yours."

Ziva chuckled. "I let you sleep Tony. I am NOT changing your clothes for you. Perhaps take them off of you at some point-" She trailed off as if pondering the thought, a teasing glint in her eye.

He took the bait. "And your breasts?"

"Hmmm. Well, I suppose we could come to a compromise. Perhaps.. You are free to look and play while we are home. Not at the office." She said, looking at the ceiling as if she was really working it out in her head.

"Not at the office? What fun is that?" He pouted.

She laughed and turned to him. "I do not think Gibbs would appreciate you suddenly yelling 'NOW!' and me ripping my blouse open."

Tony laughed. "I would. I think McGee would too." He pointed out.

She laughed along with him and shook her head. She looked down at Jake whose eyes were half closed.

"He did not sleep well last night. He was awake about every two hours instead of his normal three of four. He should sleep well today."

Tony looked a bit concerned. "Did he nurse okay?"

She nodded. "Yes, and he did not spit up. So I do not think his belly was upset. I think he missed you."

Tony chuckled. "Well, I know I missed the both of you terribly."

Ziva smiled. "I was upset after what happened- and the way I walked away from you. I kept breaking into these crying fits all day yesterday. Perhaps that affected him as well."

Tony remained quiet for several moments, instead focusing on Jake as his eyes slowly closed. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

She shook her head. "You have nothing to be sorry for Tony. I said what I needed to say. I will not apologize for that. It is just that-" She paused, trying to find the right words.

"What?" He implored.

"Sometimes, when I think about us, and this thing that has been between us since we met- I feel overwhelmed. Like it is bigger than either of us. I have trouble processing that sometimes." She turned to face him. "It is love, yes?"

He shook his head gently. "No. It's not love. It's TRUE love. Soul mate kind of love. But you're right. I feel it too. It is bigger than either one of us. " He sat up and leaned close to her face. "But NOTHING is bigger than the two of us together."

She kissed him gently before leaning back against her pillows again. She rubbed small circles on Jake's back as she allowed his words to sink in.

Tony pulled his pillows closer to her and moved to his side, mere inches away. "You were right. I do hide my emotions and fears. It's easier to act dumb and goofy than to be hurt again. But you made me realize one thing."

"What?" She whispered, her voice choked with the emotion of his words.

"There is nothing that anyone in this world could say or do that would be worse than me not having you and Jake in my life. I'll do whatever I have to do to make sure that never happens." He swore.

A lone tear slipped down Ziva's cheek. "We are not going anywhere Tony. I promise you." She kissed him gently on the forehead, then the tip of his nose, both cheeks and then met his lips hungrily.

"Stay here. I will be right back." She said, rising gently from the bed with Jake securely against her shoulder. She disappeared for only a few moments before reappearing with the baby monitor in her hand. She placed it on the table next to her side of the bed and looked down at Tony.

"Sit up." She commanded gently. He did as she said, readjusting the pillows again so that he was leaning against the headboard.

She smiled and took his hand in hers, slowly climbing on to the bed and into his lap, sitting back on his thighs with her knees bent on to the bed as she straddled him.

She touched both his cheeks with her hands then gently moved to tangle her hands in his hair. "Tony, I cannot promise everyday will be perfect. We will disagree and argue. We will fight and be angry. But we will always love. And that will win out in the end. We just have to believe in that, and trust each other."

Tony's eyes welled with tears. He attempted to fight them back but Ziva saw and leaned forward kissing each of his eyelids gently.

"I promise you that I will try to be more open. It will be hard. I've covered my emotions for so long that I'm not sure I know how NOT to do it, but I will try. This-" He gestured around the room. "-all of this is worth it."

She nodded and captured his lips with her, their tongues dueling before they broke apart for air. Their eyes were glued to each others as Ziva reached forward and gathered his tee shirt in her hands, pulling it over his head.

Their lips crashed together. Tony's natural instinct kicked in as his arms wrapped around Ziva's waist, drawing her closer. Her hands explored Tony's chest gently causing a low moan to escape from deep within him.

She pulled back from him slightly, a small grin on her face as she drunk in his features. Tony played with a loose tendril of her hair that was straight until he touched it causing it to immediately curl around his fingers.

Even her hair reacted to his touch. He smiled. "You are so beautiful." He whispered in awe as if seeing a goddess appear before him for the first time.

She smiled. "I am all yours Tony. Every fiber of my being belongs to you." She whispered quietly.

He smiled again and leaned grabbed her lips, but quickly became confused when she pulled back slightly. His brows furrowed but she just smiled seductively, slowly shaking her head as she began unbuttoning her blouse.

He drank in every peek of olive skin that was revealed and she slowly worked her way down. The shirt finally fell open and Tony was almost positive he had drool dribbling down his chin.

She slid the shirt off her shoulders leaving her only in her yoga pants and white nursing bra.

His senses were screaming at him from a distance. They needed to stop this and stop it now.

"Ziva-" He warned as his libido screamed at him to shut his mouth as she slowly slid the straps of her bra off her shoulders.

She stopped with a seductive smile on her face. "It's time Tony."

His body was betraying his own mind as he felt himself begin to harden as the sight of her slowly undressing in front of him. NO NO NO!

"But you're still-" Her finger on his lip stopped his thought immediately.

"We can still share ourselves without going all the way, yes?" She asked a bit breathlessly.

Tony took her hands in his, pulling them to his chest. He focused his attention on their hands instead of the hot and bothered partially clad Ziva currently straddling his thighs.

"Ziva, not to be crass but I want you so much that I am physically aching. But I don't want to hurt you, or frighten you if I don't hear you ask me to stop and I keep going."

"Tony." He didn't look at her so she pulled her hands from him and lifted his chin with her fingers. She looked deeply into his eyes.

"I do not know how far I can go mentally. A touch or caress the wrong way may give me a flashback. But I trust you." She kissed him gently. "I trust us." She kissed him again. "You are not them. You will not hurt me. If I say 'no' or 'stop', I trust that you will."

He smiled and pulled her to him again, crushing her in a hug that rivaled one of Abby's.

"Besides." She continued. "Remember, I can kill you with a paperclip." She joked.

He loosened his grip on her which allowed her to sit up again.

"Yes?" She asked.

He smiled. "Yes." He agreed.

To be continued


	41. Chapter 41

**I hope this chapter makes up for the break between posts. This is the reason I bumped the rating of this story up to "M". If you not into reading this kind of thing, you won't miss too much.**

**This was a hard chapter to write. Writing sex and making it believable without making it TOO graphic is tough, writing all that when one of the characters just gave birth two weeks before was near impossible, at least for me. LOL Hope it's believable yet doesn't gross anyone out.**

**Disclaimer still applies. I dare Shane Brennan and company to put this scene in an episode.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 41**

Ziva's passion laden eyes locked with Tony's. He reached his hand up, gently cupping her cheek before tousling her hair.

She smiled at his gesture of support and leaned into his touch, closing her eyes momentarily. He ran his hand down her shoulder and Ziva was sure he would reach for the clasp of her bra.

Instead, his hand disappeared, causing her eyes to snap open. His hands were now resting on her thighs, allowing her to be completely in control

She smiled and leaned forward, catching Tony's mouth with her own. "You worry too much." She whispered against his lips.

"I can't help it. It's only been a couple of weeks. You're still healing. And the books said-"

She pulled away from him with a small smile on her face. "Books?"

Tony flushed a little and began playing with a thread on the bedspread under them. "Yeah, I bought some books in Los Angeles. They all said that a woman shouldn't even try until at least six weeks."

Ziva grinned. "Well I am glad those books, probably written mostly by men, know my body well enough to share that information."

Tony looked at her teasing expression incredulously. She leaned forward spoke softly to Tony. "I love that you care enough to research. And I love that you love me enough stop when you think it will hurt me. But I can assure you Tony, I know my body. Very well. I will tell you if I am feeling discomfort. "

He stared at her face for several moments before putting his hand on her cheek again. "You are so precious to me."

She smiled. "I know that I am. I can feel that. Just like I can feel how much I want to do this." She started to feel frustrated at his expression. He still wasn't fully convinced.

She sighed and climbed off of his lap. "Okay. Perhaps another time." She bent over to pick her blouse up from the floor where she dropped it before Tony reached out and grabbed her hand. He swung around so that he was sitting on the side of the bed facing her. She let the shirt drop back to the floor as he gently pulled her to stand between his legs.

"I just- I worry about you so much. It will make me sick to my stomach if I scare you, or hurt you."

Bingo. There was the problem.

She gently pushed his bangs back from his forehead and smiled. She stepped back from him slightly.

"Undress me." She ordered.

He gaped at her. He swallowed hard as he felt him body jump to life again. "what?" He choked out.

"You heard me. Undress me!" She ordered again, this time a bit more sternly.

He swallowed hard, his body so full of anticipation that his hand had begun to shake. He reached to her, gently undoing the front clasps of her bra and opened it, allowing her breasts to fall free.

Ziva dropped her arms and allowed it to fall to the floor. She then reached for him, kissing him gently before guiding his lips to her breasts.

"They are leaking. I am sorry." She whispered.

He didn't hear her. He gently brought his hands towards her, gently running his fingertips over her nipples and stared as they responded to him. He pulled her slightly closer before bringing his mouth to her left breast, gently kissing and teasing before pulling the nipple into his mouth and tasting her.

She moaned low in her throat as her arms instinctively wrapped around his head and drew him closer. He listed carefully to the sounds she was making, experimenting to find what she enjoyed the most before moving to the other side.

She arched her back slightly causing her breast to push farther into Tony's mouth. She pulled away from him slightly when she felt her milk release.

He didn't pause. He continued lavishing attention on her as if it hadn't happened. Moving closer to him, she trailed her hands down his back before gently retracing her path with her nails. She bought her hands around his waist, tracing the taut muscles of his stomach. Her thumbs gently tracing his belly button before her fingers followed the line of hair underneath that disappeared into his waistband.

As soon as her fingers grazed his pants he released her breast and trailed kisses down her stomach, dipping his tongue into her navel before pulling away.

She had a slightly pouty look on her face which caused him to smile. "Now where was I?" He asked her softly. He reached for her waist, gently massaging the bare skin there before dipping his fingers into the soft edges of her pants.

He looked to her for approval and felt considerable stirring begin in his boxers when she nodded to him, all the while biting her bottom lip in anticipation.

Slowly, he slid the pants down her legs, fascinated as her body twitched slightly in anticipation. He reached for the lacy waistband of her panties when she suddenly stepped back, the erotic, lost look gone from her face.

"Wait, just one second." She told him. Before he knew what was happening, she disappeared into the bathroom.

He sat alone on the edge of the bed and shifted uncomfortably, realizing that he would have to free himself from the confines of his pants soon.

She returned a moment later with a towel and something else in her hand that she quickly tucked under the disturbed sheets on the bed.

Tony must have had an odd look as he stared at the towel. Ziva blushed crimson and looked away. "I- uh-" She paused to find the right words. "Things are still….messy…."

He smiled understandingly and gingerly stood from the bed. She noticed his predicament and smiled, moving to him and capturing his lips with hers. As their tongues dueled, Tony suddenly felt relief and realized she had opened the front of his pants.

They let them fall to the floor leaving him clad in only his boxers. He stepped out of them and reached for the towel on the bed, spreading it across for her.

She smiled and sat on her knees in the spot he'd just vacated. She pulled him to her and returned the favor, lavishing attention on his nipples with her mouth.

Tony tangled his hands in her hair, allowing her to lead them to where she wanted. His hands traveled down her back as he gently massaged every millimeter of flesh he could reach, scar riddled or not.

Her mouth trailed down his chest and stomach but suddenly stopped when she reached his navel. She pulled back and looked at him with a curious expression on her face.

"What's wrong?" He asked, concerned that they'd gone too far too soon.

She shook her head. "Nothing. That is what is surprising me."

He looked down into her eyes questioning her.

She smiled. "I thought that when it came time for me to… touch you… it would terrify me."

"But it's not?" He asked gently.

She shook her head as she hooked her fingers in the waistband of his boxers. "I am looking forward to it." She said seductively as his boxers slid farther and farther down his legs.

His erection sprung free and suddenly jumped when he noticed Ziva staring and licking her lips. Not able to take the teasing anymore, he laid her back on the bed and joined her, laying at her left side while she was on her back.

His mouth found her breasts again however in this position, he was more free to be able to explore her body. As he took turns licking and kissing at her breasts, his hands trailed along the soft skin of her stomach. Ziva groaned softly as her body arched into his touch again.

Tony suddenly stopped and looked at her. Her head was tossed slightly to the side. Her eyes were closed and her lips were swollen from his kisses. Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled at him.

"My God your beautiful." He whispered to her.

She smiled and turned on her side to face him, gently pressing against him and sliding her right leg over top of his.

"So are you." She returned, trailed her hands down his chest and between the two of them. "Your beautiful inside and out Tony. You have helped me become a better person. I love you so much." She whispered into his ear.

He was about to reply when it came out in a harsh moan as her hands gently caressed him. She smiled. "Do you like that Tony?"

Tony couldn't reply as she touched and explored him intimately. Her soft hands caressed his testicles before moving to his shaft. He swore he was harder than he'd ever been in his life. His erection was practically pressing against his belly and the more she touched him, the sooner he was going to lose it.

He gently pressed her onto her back again, pulling the leg she'd had thrown over him up at the knee until it was bent.

She knew he was losing control and took pity on him by using her hands and exploring the muscles of his back.

He gently cupped her over her panties, testing her reaction. It was instant, her body arched and contorted causing her back to leave the bed completely.

Tony kissed her left breast quickly before traveling up to her ear and gently pulling the lobe into his mouth. "There's that little minx I've been hot for." He whispered.

She smiled and opened her eyes. She found his hand that was resting over her panties and pressed it down gently causing her to moan and lose her breath momentarily.

"H- how long?" She whispered.

He smiled. "How long have I been hot for you? Hmmm- let me think."

He cupped her again and watched her reaction in fascination. "Shit Tony!" She moaned.

He sucked at her earlobe again swirling his tongue in and out of her ear as she settled down again. He moved over to look into her face. She sensed his movement and opened her eyes, losing herself in his soul as he stared at her.

"I've wanted you since the moment I met you." He whispered, causing her to smile. He voice suddenly took teasing tone. "Don't laugh. When you were sitting at McGee's desk and pulled your hair down….. I could have bent you over his desk and taken you right there."

Tony felt her breath hitch with arousal. Her eyes were wide with desire as she stared at him. He pulled himself even closer, his face millimeters from hers. "When was the last time you had an orgasm Ziva?" He whispered.

She arched again and mumbled incoherently as his hand worked it's magic on her again. "What was that? I didn't hear you."

"Two-" she mumbled.

"Two? Two what?" He implored.

He regained some of her composure and opened her eyes again. "Two days… before I went into labor."

Tony stared her in the eyes, a mix of emotions playing across his face. She had told him she's never had sex with Josh. Did she lie? Was there someone else? Did she- Oh boy. Yeah. He figured it out.

"Did you-?" He began to ask in a teasing tone.

She smiled and nodded, bring her right hand up and wiggling her two fingers.

His erection jumped again. "So you-"

"Yes. Despite what some men may think, a lot of women do. And yes, I do. And I enjoy it. It helped relieve some of the pressure I was feeling before I went into labor."

"And you were okay with it?" he asked, genuinely interested.

She nodded. "It was difficult with my big belly. But I sat on the edge of the bed-" She leaned up to whisper in his ear. "-I spread my legs and pretended that my fingers were yours. I even moaned your name when I orgasmed Tony. "

His entire body twitched. "M-my name?"

She nodded gently. "I-uh… I could not bring myself to do it for a long time. But after Paris, and cuddling against you and feeling your erection pressed against me, I was able to. As a matter of fact, that morning, in Paris, I did it in the shower that morning. It was the first time since before Somalia."

Tony wasn't able to breath properly. He felt as if the air had left his lungs and the room was spinning. "You were ten feet away from me…mast-"

She cut him off. "Yes. I had to shove a washcloth into my mouth so you did not hear me. That little trip actually became a big step in my psychological healing." She explained.

"Teach me." He told her in a breathless whisper.

She smiled and took his hand that was still resting over her panties She brought it up to the edge of her panties and ordered. "Take them off."

He smiled and hooked his fingers in the waistband, sliding them gently from her hips. She raised herself up to allow him to completely remove them.

Her right leg was still bent at the knee, so she bent her other leg, gesturing for Tony to assume what would be a typical missionary position.

She searched around on the bed for the item she'd hidden there earlier. Finding the tube, she displayed it to Tony. Personal lubricant, KY Jelly to be exact. She methodically placed some on his fingers and placed them on her clit, showing him exactly how she liked to be touched while she was still coherent enough to do so.

Tony picked up her instructions right away, taking over on his own while she brought her arms up and rested them next to her head. He gently rubbed her bundle of nerves, watching as she began to writhe on the bed and moan along with his gentle movement.

The sounds slipping from her throat began to coincide with the movements of his fingers. Listening to her and feeling her naked writhing body beneath him became too much. His breath came in short gasps and he was soon moaning along with her unable to control himself as he continued pushing her to the edge.

His fingers began to explore her as his pointer finger continued to toy with her clit. His thumb came a little too close to her opening which caused her to jump slightly and wince.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" He swore jerking his entire hand away from her.

She moaned in frustration. "Dammit!" She muttered. "I am okay Tony, just a little tender-"

"But-" He began but she reached forward and grabbed his arms harshly.

"You are NOT going to bring me that close and just LEAVE me!" She ground out from between clenched teeth.

He swallowed hard, suddenly very frightened of the turned on woman beneath him. "Uh- no?" He asked, almost as a question.

She smiled sweetly and settled back onto the bed. "Good." She said. She pulled him down on top of her, using her leg to rub against Tony's erection as it pressed against it.

"Ziva- oh god!" He swore as the pressure continued to build.

Tony forced his eyes open once she stopped and looked down at her. She bore an evil grin on her face.

"You are truly evil." He told her.

She cocked one eyebrow and shrugged. "But you enjoy my evilness, yes?" She asked.

He smiled. "Oh yes. Yes!" He yelled suddenly when her hand had taken his shaft and held him gently. She used her leg for leverage and moved him over until he was centered over top of her.

"Ziva-" he warned, thinking he knew what she was doing.

She didn't answer, instead her moved the head of his penis and began gently rubbing it against her clit. Tony picked up the pace, replacing her hand with his, rubbing against her in a gentle rocking motion.

She brought her legs up and wrapped them over his, opening herself up for him even more. He concentrated on pleasuring her. She began to gently rock against him and soon they were in a rhythm. Her moans became entangled in words she muttered in mixed languages.

He couldn't hold on anymore. Their bodies were now slick with sweat, the mixture of the lubricant and Tony's excretions felt like liquid silk every time they rocked together. He couldn't breath, every breath he tried to pull in was nothing but her. Her scent, her touch, her feel.

Suddenly, she cried his name and arched against him, clutching him tightly as she rode the waves of her orgasm. She continued to clutch him tightly but as her senses came back to her, she reached down and took Tony into her hand. She began rubbing her hand up and down his shaft, first slowly then picking up the pace.

"Do it Tony. Let go." She begged in his ear. His whole body tightened and he called out her name as he released causing him to smile as he fought to bring his breathing under control.

He collapsed beside her on the bed bringing her to his chest. "Damn-" he muttered causing her to chuckle. His entire body felt like a helpless mess.

Her chest still heaved as her breathing returned to normal. "You feel better, yes?" She asked.

He laughed. "Oh yes."

She raised her head up and looked him in the eyes. "Much better than doing it myself." She told him causing him to laugh. She laughing with him and laid her head back down.

"How long before Jake has to eat?" He asked.

She glanced at the clock. "About an hour. And we both need a shower."

He smiled and pulled her closer. "Give me a few minutes to recover and I'll join you in there." He offered.

"Deal." She said, smiling and capturing his lips with her own.

To Be Continued


	42. Chapter 42

**Disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 42**

"Palmer?" Gibbs asked, surprised by his sudden visitor.

The young man looked nervous, visibly swallowing as he reached the bottom of the steps and looking around the basement in a bit of awe.

Gibbs smirked. His basement must have become part of his enigmatic legend.

"Uh yeah, S-sorry to intrude." Palmed used his pointer finger to push his glasses up his nose. "But, what I came to say is important."

Gibbs didn't reply. He had always taken a sick sense of pleasure at intimidating the squirrelly younger man with just his icy stare. Gibbs applied that tactic now, and though he saw Palmer begin to shrink away from him, he was surprised to see him take a deep breath, set his body tight and step forward.

"Stop trying to intimidate me." Palmer said a bit indignantly.

"Is that what I was doing?" Gibbs asked "Why are you here?" He asked, moving over to his workbench and sitting down.

Jimmy shook his head. "I'm not here about me. I'm here about Tony."

Gibbs took a drink out of the coffee mug that sat nearby. "DiNozzo is in Los Angeles." Gibbs pointed out.

"Uh no, no he's not." Palmer corrected. Gibbs' stare fixed on him.

"What do you mean 'No he's not'?"

"Just what I said. I was over visiting Ziva and the baby. Tony came in and collapsed in her arms."

Gibbs stood slowly stood. "Why?"

Palmer shook his head. "I don't know. Ziva isn't exactly the most forthcoming person when it comes to personal matters. Tony didn't even realize I was there. He was focused solely on her."

Gibbs sipped his cup again. "I'm going to kill him if he went MIA from his assignment."

Jimmy shook his head. He waved a finger in the air as he began to slowly wander around the basement, glancing at the shelves and workbench.

"See that's…that's why I'm here."

Gibbs cocked his eyebrow and stared. Palmer had summoned up his courage and wasn't about to back down now.

"Whatever is going on,… you can't send Tony back to LA. " Jimmy instructed.

"Oh really? And why is that?" Gibbs asked, surprisingly not angry.

Palmer stopped exploring and sighed, turning to face Gibbs. "I don't know what you've noticed or not noticed, but Tony has had a hard time adjusting in the last year or so."

Gibbs smirked. "Really?"

Palmer ignored his sarcasm. "It started when he thought Ziva had become involved with this guy from Miami. It bothered Tony, but as was usual for the two of them, he kept it to himself. I guess he thought it wouldn't work out and things would go back to normal. When it didn't, and he found out she was pregnant, it did him in. He fell apart."

"I know all this Palmer." Gibbs pointed out.

"You may know it, but have you accepted it?"

Gibbs' glowered at him but Jimmy wouldn't waiver. "You saw it happening, why didn't you do anything to try and stop it?"

"If Tony had wanted my help, he would have come to me. Besides, there's rules-"

"Rules can't dictate the human heart Gibbs!" Palmer stated emphatically. "And no, Tony wouldn't have come to you. You keep everyone at arms length, as if you're trying to protect yourself from getting too close. I was the one Tony called when he fell apart time and time again. I was the one going to pick him up at bars when his keys were taken away from him. I was the one who listened to him ramble incessantly about how much he loved Ziva, and his own demons forced him to lose her, if he every had her in the first place. And now they've got a shot here Gibbs, a real shot, and you sent him away. He should have told you 'no'"

"He has a job to do Palmer." Gibbs said softly, surprising Jimmy even more as he'd expected to be on the receiving end of a tirade.

"You're right. He does. But family comes before the job Gibbs. And despite the false air you try to put on, you know that your precious team has become a family. They look up to you with so much respect, they'd never stand up to you. The few times they do it ends drastically."

Gibbs stated at him waiting for him to elaborate. "Ziva, she tried to stand up to you in Israel. You left her standing on the runway in Tel Aviv." Gibbs took a deep breath to argue but Palmer stopped him. "I'm not saying you were wrong in that situation. She and Tony look to you like a surrogate father. They don't want to disappoint you. But they need this time to be together, to work out this thing between them. Tony is taking on Fatherhood without any kind mental preparation. They need to be together in order to figure this all out."

Gibbs was quiet but Palmer knew he'd gotten his point across. Jimmy walked across the basement and began to ascend the steps. He stopped momentarily and ducked his head down so Gibbs could see him.

"When your daughter was born, how long did you stay by your wife's side?" Palmer asked. He didn't wait for an answer and continued up the steps and out of Gibbs' line of sight.

Gibbs smirked as Palmer disappeared. He glanced around the basement momentarily before looking up the steps again. His mind flashed back to a time not so long ago, of a baby-faced young Ziva crouching in the doorway after she'd just shot Ari. She had the look of a killer in her eyes in that very moment. The image in Gibbs' mind eye switched to Ziva as he'd seen her just two night ago; a glowing new mother smiling down at her newborn nestled against her chest.

And DiNozzo, he thought back to that cocky, arrogant, skirt chasing young kid he'd met straight from the Baltimore PD to that man he'd become, silently crying as he held Ziva tight to him supporting her as she confessed her torture and abuse to them.

Gibbs brushed the sawdust from him clothes and ascended the stairs.

* * *

Tony had the shower temperature just right as he stopped in and allowed the water to wash over his weary body.

He was exhausted. The lack of sleep, travel and… rigorous activities of just a short time ago had left him craving several hours of down time.

However, the prospect of a naked Ziva sharing the shower stall with him was too good to pass up.

He turned from the spray of water and smiled when he saw her shadow enter the room. He opened the stall door and smiled enticingly as she placed the baby monitor on the sink and turned, opening her robe and dropping it on the floor.

She took his outstretched hand and stepped in, jumping slightly at the coolness of the water. "Tony! The water is freezing!"

"Uh, sorry. I usually like my showers on the cool side." He confessed, moving the knob just a tiny bit to the warmer side.

She smiled. "You will just have to warm me up." She said, stepping closer to him and relaxing as his arms immediately engulfed her, pulling her flush against him as their mouths collided.

She pulled back for air, allowing her forehead to rest on Tony's chest as water cascaded around them. "Jake needs to eat soon."

Tony nodded. "I know." His hand gently traced the side of her face before his thumb hooked under her chin and he raised her eyes to his. He kissed her again gently.

"That doesn't mean Mommy and Daddy can't play before then." He pointed out.

"That is true. What do you have in mind?"

He reached behind them and grabbed her shower sponge, pouring gel on it and beginning to wash her body. He was gentle and slow, enjoying learning her body with his touch. Her eyes were closed and she leaned into his touch, enjoying it as much as he was.

He gently turned her around so he could get her back, but felt her slight hesitation. "Okay?" He asked.

She nodded but didn't respond. Tony resumed his ministrations, taking deep breaths to calm his body down somewhat. The more he touched her, the more he hardened. Her body was simply amazing to him.

Tony began to pull her closer to him but she suddenly spun back around so that she was facing him again. She haphazardly made a play for the sponge but he held it away from her as he searched her face.

"Ut uh. I grabbed it first, my turn." She smiled but made a grab for it again, causing it to fall to the bottom of the tub.

Tony grabbed her instead, choosing to duel with her tongue instead of dueling for the sponge. His lips to traveled to her left ear, then down her shoulder blade as his hands gently explored her breasts. He continued to touch and massage her one breast as his lips latched onto the other. His free hand traveled down her body between the juncture of her legs.

She stepped apart, allowing his fingers access to her bundle of nerves. His touch sent fire through her and he knew exactly how to touch her.

Suddenly, he spun her around so that her back was to him again. He pulled her against him. He felt her muscles twitch but attributed it to the aroused state she was in.

Her right leg hooked behind his allowing his fingers to resume their previous activities. He pulled her back tightly to his front. As he worked his fingers, her arms snaked up and around the back of his neck. His free hand began massaging her breasts causing her to moan slightly.

The sound caused his erection to jump. The moment Ziva felt it she suddenly stiffened and pulled completely away from him, pressing herself against the cool tile as far away from him as she could.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned. He reached out for her only to stop when she flinched and put her arm up to stop him.

She took a few claming breaths before looking at him with saddened eyes. "I am sorry." she told him.

"What happened?" He asked.

She shook her head sadly. "There is just something about-" She stopped and brushed her soaked curls away from her face.

Tony began to understand. "There's something about feeling me pressed up behind you?"

She nodded. "It scares me. It makes me think of that first horrible gang rape-"

He held his arms out and allowed her to come to him. She buried her face in his chest and allowed his warmth to envelope her.

She was trembling slightly at first, but stopped and sighed deeply as his warmth permeated her. Tony allowed her several moments to calm herself before joking, "Well you know, I think I like your front better anyway."

His bad attempt at a joke brought a chuckle from her. "I love you so much." She whispered, kissing him.

"I love you too. And if that freaks you out, no big deal. Over time it might get better."

She nodded. "I hope so." She hugged him one more time before muttering. "We really need to get out of here."

He chuckled and allowed her to finish rinsing the soap from her body and exiting the shower before he finished. He walked into the bedroom to see her sitting on the bed toweling her hair. To his disappointment she was already dressed.

She smiled as he came into the room. "Jake is still sleeping. He is laying like a starfish with his arms and legs all sprawled out." She said with a chuckle.

He smiled. "Why don't you lay down and get some rest. I'll give Jake a bottle. It'll give me a chance to spend some Daddy time with him."

She nodded. "Okay, but I do not know if I will sleep. My hair will be a mess." She pointed out.

He gestured for her to lay down. She climbed under the covers and laid on her side. Tony laid down behind her, careful not to press too closely against her.

"Do you know why I don't like warm showers?" He asked her softly.

She shook her head slight, cognizant of the effort Tony was making.

"I don't like the spray of warm moisture in my face." He said in almost a whisper.

She turned her head slightly towards him. "Why?" She asked just as quietly.

Tony was quiet for a long while before he answered, "The day Kate was shot, her blood sprayed in my face. It gives me a constant reminder of that." He confessed.

Ziva let out a deep breath and reached back for his hand. She pulled his arm in front of her and played with his fingers.

"Sometimes, I replay that scene in my head time and time again." He whispered.

"It must have been horrible." She sympathized, not realizing what she was doing, she shifted back closer against him for support.

"It was one of the most horrible things in my life. She was the closest thing to a sister I'd ever had. And for that to be my last memory of her-" His voice choked up slightly.

She allowed him a few moments. "It was par for the course of how our relationship would go, yes? Did I say that right?"

"Yeah, but what do you mean?"

"That we would meet during such a senseless tragedy."

He hugged her tightly from behind and began stroking her hair. After several quiet minutes, Ziva chuckled slightly.

"What?" He asked.

"It did not take you long to get me over my fear up feeling you behind me." She pointed out.

Tony realized that it was true. He was still naked, and although she was dressed, he was pressed tightly up against her butt without her realizing it.

He smiled. "Hey, when I'm good, I'm good." .

To Be Continued


	43. Chapter 43

**I guess we are all lucky that I had this chapter half written before Tuesday night's episode. The writers finally did it, they pushed me to the brink and I got so angry and shut the episode off in the middle. Why they feel that need to completely trash a character in order to "move" a story along is beyond me. They're really making Tony look like an ass. They've pushed me to the point where I don't care if TIVA happens or not, which is sad. If destroying a character, bringing in all the Michael Rivkins/Ejs/Rays, and completely changing a character in the blink of an eye is the only way they can make it happen, then I don't want to see it. Just stop the flirting, suggestive glances, and stolen moments and let Ziva be happy with Ray, let Tony go spread his sperm all over the Metro-DC area for the rest of his life.**

**That being said, I don't know how long my muse will continue to feed this story to me. The turn of events on the show have left me so saddened that it was a struggle to finish this chapter. I will do my best, cross your fingers that something better happens with the writing. ::sigh::**

**Disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 43**

They stayed spooned together for a while. Tony had felt the change in Ziva's breathing and figured that she had drifted off the sleep. He allowed her in and out breathing to lull him to sleep shortly after.

It didn't feel as if he'd been out for too long however when his eyes snapped open. Ziva hadn't moved at all, and he turned his head towards the baby monitor, guessing that perhaps the baby crying had woken him.

It was quiet.

He sighed, still feeling exhausted and frustrated at the fact that he couldn't sleep. He gently slid from the bed and went to the bag of clothes he'd brought over before. Pulling out a pair of boxers, sweatpants, and a tee shirt, he quickly slipped them on and went to check on the baby.

Glancing over the edge of the crib, he smiled when he saw Jake's brown eyes staring up at him.

"Hey little guy." He said softly, scooping the baby into his arms. "What a good boy letting Mommy and Daddy get some rest."

He placed the baby on the changing table and began changing his diaper. As he lifted the small shirt up he was surprised when something fell out from underneath.

Tony picked up the small object and grimaced. Jake was staring at him, blinking his long eyelashes and waiting to hear what his Daddy was going to say next.

He smiled at Jake and held up the offensive item. "Oh great, Daddy gets to spend some along time with you and I broke part of you off!" He said quietly. Tony could almost swear he saw a glint appear in Jake's eyes, almost as if he was laughing along with Tony.

He put the umbilical cord stump off to the side and finished with the baby's diaper. Once Jake was all set to go, Tony pulled him to his chest and walked into the living room. He took a bottle of milk out of the fridge and set it in the counter, having it at the ready for when Jake wanted it.

A small knock on the door drew Tony's attention. He lifted Jake tighter to his chest, using one hand to support his behind and the other his head. Opening the door, he couldn't help but take a deep breath of surprise to see Gibbs standing there holding a small box in his hand.

"Boss?" Tony asked.

"DiNozzo." Gibbs answered.

Tony stepped back and allowed Gibbs to enter the apartment. Gibbs immediately went and sat on the sofa, watching the younger man move hesitantly across the room.

"Is there some reason you're here and not in Los Angeles?" Gibbs tested, already knowing the answer.

Tony paused momentarily as he went to sit in Ziva's chair. Jake cuddled deeper into Tony's chest causing Tony to smile slightly and hug the infant to him even tighter, placing a gentle kiss on his head.

"Hetty gave us the weekend to off. I came home to be with my family." He answered.

"Your family. Is that what this is DiNozzo?"

Tony looked down at the small bundle in his arms and he felt his heart clench, just as it did every time he was with Jake.

"Yes, it is." Tony challenged. "I can't imagine my life without Jake or Ziva in it."

Gibbs leaned forward, placing his arms on his knee. "Then why did you go to LA?"

Tony's brows furrowed in confusion. "My orders-"

Gibbs shook his head. "Tony, listen to me. I take a lot of pride in my job. And I have a lot of pride in our team. We've become like a family, as dysfunctional as it may be."

He stopped to gather his thoughts. "I am damn proud of you Tony. You stepped forward and became a father to a little boy who probably would be without one. And you and Ziva, despite being two of the most hard headed people in the world, can really make this work. I've seen how the two of you work together, and it's absolutely incredible. I've seen the two of your apart, and I see how that doesn't work. The two of you have an incredible opportunity here, and you're going to give that little boy the most incredible life."

Tony felt absolutely flustered hearing these words coming from Gibbs. He sat and allowed the words to sink in unsure of what to say. Jake began to squirm causing Tony to run his nose against the baby's downy hair. Jake immediately stilled and clenched onto a small wrinkle in Tony's shirt.

"I'm not sure what to say Boss-" He began.

Gibbs shook his head. "You don't have to say anything. I just want you to know. Do you want to go back to Los Angeles?"

"No." Tony answered quickly.

Gibbs stood and began moving towards the kitchen. "Then next time, tell me that. Your situation has changed now Tony. I have to get used to that. And until I do, I need you to tell me when I'm wrong."

Gibbs stopped when he noticed Ziva leaning against the doorway in the hall. Neither man knew when she'd entered the room, but she had a teary smile on her face. Gibbs nodded at her and went to the counter, putting Jake's bottle in the warmer.

Ziva walked over and sat on the couch next to where Gibbs was sitting. The warmer popped off. Gibbs expertly removed the bottle and began moved back into the living room area. He stood in front of Tony , placed the bottle on the table and reached his hands out.

Tony took the hint and stood, handing him the baby and went to sit next to Ziva. Gibbs watched in amusement as Ziva instinctively moved into Tony's embrace. His arm went around her and she leaned into his shoulder. "I thought you were going to sleep longer." He said to her softly, kissing her mess of curly hair.

She shrugged. "I woke up and was wondering where you had disappeared to."

They turned back to Gibbs and watched as he offered Jake his bottle. The baby sucked greedily, almost as if it was the first meal he'd had in weeks. Ziva smiled and shook her head.

"He definitely eats like you." She told Tony.

DiNozzo smile. "Nah. If he eats pizza and donuts like then, then I'll take credit."

Gibbs smiled peacefully down at the baby as Jake batted his long lashes at him. "I'll give you credit Ziver, you made a beautiful son."

She smiled. Sensing that Gibbs was in a different kind of mood, she ventured; "Did Kelly always look like you?"

Gibbs' grin brightened. "Yeah. Shannon said she was a miniature version of me from the day she was born." He gestured to the box that he'd arrived with, now sitting on the coffee table.

"I used to keep family pictures and momentos in that. I took out what I wanted. But there's something in there that I want to two of you to have."

Tony and Ziva shared a look before he reached down and brought the small box to his lap. He opened it and was surprised to find several small bits of paper inside, each with handwriting scribbled on it.

They both reached inside and began pulling out the slips of paper and reading them.

"These are 'The Rules"." Ziva told him in surprise.

Gibbs nodded but kept his focus on the baby. "Shannon was the one who introduced me to rules to live your life by. She helped me write the first nine."

Tony had pulled Rule 9 out just a few seconds before Gibbs mentioned it. "Never go anywhere without a knife." He read, noticing that the handwriting didn't belong to his boss.

"Shannon wrote that. We were out at the park and Kelly had gotten chewing gum stuck in her hair. I had to use my knife to cut it out."

Ziva felt her eyes stinging with tears. She forced them back and continued to poke through the box.

"Rule 51. Sometimes you 're wrong." She read.

Gibbs nodded. "That rule is especially for the two of you. I threatened both of you with Rule 12 for so long, and you still managed to fall in love." He said in what could almost be called a teasing manner.

Ziva smiled while Tony smirked. They reached the bottom of the box and found a wallet sized picture of Kelly. Her hair was pulled in pigtails, almost like Abby wore, only Kelly's blonde hair was much longer. She was wearing a pink and white dress and posed with her hands out, a large smile adorning her face.

Tony picked up the picture and smiled. "You missed one." He said holding it out.

Gibbs had just placed Jake's bottle on the table and moved him to his shoulder. As he began patting his back he looked at the couple and shook his head. "That was intentional."

Tony pulled the picture back and handed it to Ziva. She stared down at the happy little girl and smiled down at her.

She looked at Gibbs with a small puzzled look on her face. Jake grunted several times but finally burrped causing Gibbs to smile. "I want to two of you to have that." He gestured towards the photo. "It was taken a few months before she died."

His voice dropped several timbres. "Keep that as a memory…. A reminder. Give this little boy the life she never had a chance to live."

A lone tear trailed down Ziva's face. Tony's eyes were moist as he reached out and placed a hand on Gibbs' knee.

"We promise Boss."

Gibbs began feeling emotionally overwhelmed. He stood and handed the baby to Tony and started moving towards the door, anxious to exit the room quickly.

"McGee will be calling you later. He'll need a brief before he takes your spot in Los Angeles. I'll need you at the office until this mission is over. Then I think we can arrange some vacation time." He told Tony.

"I don't have to go back to LA?" He asked excitedly.

Gibbs shook his head. "I shouldn't have sent you there to start with." he suddenly stopped and turned back towards Tony, pointing a finger at him. "You should have told me 'No'."

Tony nodded. "I'll never not defy your orders again Boss." Tony said in a smart ass manner.

Gibbs rolled his eyes and moved over to Ziva, kissing the top of her head. "You're stuck with him now." He told her.

She smiled and shrugged. "I can think of worse situations to be in." Gibbs laughed and began his exit again.

"Thanks Boss!" Tony called to him.

Gibbs didn't turn around but stated, "Thank Palmer. You have a lot of good friends who care about you."

And with that, he was gone.

Ziva went and locked the door behind him. She turned to see Tony making faces down at the baby.

She smiled and shook her head, moving towards the kitchen. "Are you hungry?"

Tony nodded. "I'm famished. Sex always does that to me." He said with a glint in his eye.

She smiled and shook her head. "Well then we had better keep our cabinets well stocked, yes?"

Tony's ears perked up when he heard her response. He heard the microwave begin and smiled at Ziva when she came back in to sit down.

"Oh yeah, should I tell you now or later?" He questioned.

"Tell me what?"

Tony laid Jake down on his lap and lifted up his shirt, showing Ziva his belly button. "I broke a piece of him off." He said jokingly.

Ziva's eyes widened and she smiled. "I thought he would be losing that anytime now. It was barely hanging on this morning."

Tony shook his head. "Good thing I read those books. I probably would have called 911 if I hadn't." He said with a laugh.

Ziva leaned over Jake. "Your just growing up too fast Little Man." She said.

Jake glanced up at his parents in amusement. Silly people.

To be continued


	44. Chapter 44

**Well, it's cold and rainy here in Southern New Jersey, so for that reason, I think our couple deserved one more sexy romp before getting back to the serious stuff, n'es pas?**

**Disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 44**

They had taken turns cuddling Jake while they ate lunch. He seemed determined to stay awake for as long as he could, and trying to eat and balance as infant was near impossible.

Once he was finally down, Tony and Ziva took the opportunity to catch up on some much craved sleep. They both fell asleep almost instantly, Ziva's head tucked comfortably onto Tony's chest.

This time, she was the first to wake. She laid peacefully, watching Tony sleep as she played with strands of his chest hair. She thought about the amazing turn of events her life had taken in the last several days.

She smiled slightly and shook her head. It was easier to just go with it, instead of trying to wrap her head around things. She was never the princess type. She never had to dress in designer clothes, have her hair perfectly coiffed, and have a man at her every beckon call. As a child, she'd never wanted her room painted pink, nor did she want to play dress up with Barbie dolls.

But, the last few days had changed that. Sure, Josh had pampered her through her pregnancy. But it just wasn't the same considering their relationship.

She'd always imagined having a husband who would massage her sore feet and back, who would help her apply vitamin E lotion to help prevent stretch marks. She'd imagined being in love so deeply and their baby would just be the cherry on top of the perfect sundae that was their life. They'd play and experiment in new ways to make love as her belly grew and grew. He'd be in the delivery room holding her hand and being able to watch as the baby slipped from her body to grab it's first breath of air.

She'd had some of that with Josh. He had rubbed her swollen feet, and rubbed her shoulders and back when they were achy. However, nothing felt like a full body nude massage, and that was definitely not something she was going to share with Josh.

Jacob's delivery had been wonderful, but not what she'd always dreamed. Amie, conscious of their situation and relationship, had ordered a drape put up which concealed Ziva from the waist down before Josh was let into the delivery room. The passionate kiss she'd always dreamed of getting when she heard the baby's first cry was a kiss on the forehead and reassurance that she'd done a great job.

She loved her son more than she could ever imagine loving anything in her life. She wouldn't trade him for the world. But somewhere, nagging at the back of her mind, she regretted that Tony wasn't there in the delivery room with her, waiting for THEIR son to be born.

Now that they were together, Ziva felt an ache in her heart for the children she and Tony would never have. Yes, they could try IVF. But she was already warned that there was a slight change it would work the first time. Amie had told her the chance of it working twice was slim to none. There was already too much damage to her uterus, and carrying a baby full term would just add to that damage.

She and Tony could adopt. And she had no doubt that any child they brought into their life would bring joy to their lives. Yet, she knew that she would always miss the "what could have been". What would her and Tony's son or daughter look like? Would they have his light colored eyes or her deep, dark ones. Would they have his dimples? Her complexion?

They'd never know. And that hurt her worse than anything Saleem or his men had done to her.

Tony began to stir which broke Ziva out of her reverie. He tightened his grip on her but didn't open his eyes.

"I can feel you thinking." He mumbled.

She smiled softly. "Sorry."

"How long did you sleep?"

She raised her head slightly and looked at the alarm clock. "About an hour. That leaves us about 45 minutes before Jake eats again."

Tony slowly opened his eyes and looked down at her. Ziva's breath hitched for a moment when she saw the depth of emotion reflected in his green orbs.

They stared at each other for several moments, their faces millimeters apart. Tony began playing with her hair before he finally spoke.

"This is like a dream."

She smiled. "I know. There were so many times that I woke up and swore you were in bed with me, holding me… protecting me from my nightmares. But then I realized I was alone-"

Tony's hand came around and touched her cheek gently. "You were never alone baby. You could have called me anytime day or night and I would've been there."

She turned her head and kissed his hand. "The strange thing is, I know that. I knew that then. I always sought comfort in that thought. I figured that I could not have you like I wanted to, so your friendship was the next best thing."

"Our friendship meant the world to me. I didn't even realize it until you were gone." His voice choked up a bit. "After Jenny died and Vance separated us, I wanted to call you so much. I wanted to jump ship and call you, find out where you were and jump on the first plane there. I dreamed of you meeting me at whatever distant airport it was and you collapsing in my arms. We'd go to the closest hotel and I'd undress you slowly, memorizing every millimeter of you. We'd make love for what would seem like hours, just teasing and learning each other. We'd declare that we'd be together forever, and no one, not Gibbs, Vance, Eli or Mossad would be able to separate us again."

Ziva rolled until she was laying flat on top of Tony, her chin resting on his chest. "So why did you not call?"

He stared at her sadly. He pushed her hair back and touched her cheek again. "I thought you would say no. Or even worse laugh at me. I couldn't open my heart up to you and have you stomp all over it."

Ziva sighed. "Tony, I would have said yes. I would have even met you half way. When I got back to Tel Aviv, I jumped every time my phone rang, or I was notified of a new e-mail. All I needed was a signal and I would have come running. It was so bad that even Father made mention of how I always ran to answer my phone. So then I thought maybe, just maybe, you were trying to contact me and he was stopping it somehow. So I called you… you never called me back."

"I got your messages. I just… I wanted you with me so bad. I was afraid that if I talked to you… you'd be able to hear it in my voice. And then after a few weeks, I didn't know what to say to you anymore. It was easier to pretend you didn't exist then to open my heart up to you." He confessed.

"I had tried so hard to change. I did not want to be nothing more than the dutiful Mossad agent. I wanted to change, so you would love me the way that I loved you. When you did not call, I thought it was in vain. I thought that you looked at me as nothing more than your partner. So I slipped back into my old persona. I became Eli's dutiful daughter again. I turned to Michael as an outlet. He had been sniffing around me for weeks. Now we know why."

"Did- did you love him?" He asked softly.

"No. I was falling in love with what I thought he could give me. He knew me, the 'real' me, and it did not frighten him, it was not something for him to joke about. I thought he wanted me for me, and it felt good to have that for the first time in my life. "

She suddenly blushed deeply, a sight that Tony would never get used to seeing. "What?" He asked.

"The first time Michael and I…" she stopped when she felt Tony's body stiffen slightly. She touched his cheek gently before continuing. "The first time, Michael was on top of me, he was concentrating so hard… when he… entered me I slipped and called him by your name."

Tony's eyes widened as he fought down the urge to laugh. "Uh… how did he handle that?"

She shook her head. "He didn't hear me. He froze and asked me what I had said. I made up something ridiculous but it appeased him enough to continue. I was so mortified. Afterwards, I decided that I had to get over you once and for all. I couldn't let a one sided love ruin my entire chance at happiness."

"That should have been me. Promise me one thing Ziva."

"What?"

Tony leaned closer to her, whispering seductively in her ear; "Promise me that the first time I am inside you, the first time I feel your velvety warmth surrounding me, that you won't call me by the wrong name."

He laughed when she smacked him on the arm. "Keep it up and you will not get the opportunity." She warned.

"You're cutting me off already?" He whined jokingly.

Ziva gently ran her hand down his body and cupped him through his sweatpants causing him to wince. He began to come alive in her hand as she gently began to massage him.

"Oh no. I could never do that. I cannot wait to feel you filling me. I cannot wait until I can turn every bit of my control over to you. I will pour every ounce of my trust into making love to you. You own me Tony. My heart, my mind, my soul. I will gladly give that to you."

Tony sat up and captured her lips with his. Their tongues dueled for control as Tony gently removed her hand. "Ziva, if you keep that up, I'm going to need another shower."

She smiled before climbing off of Tony and on to the floor. She slipped her shirt over her head and dropped her pants to the floor quickly, leaving only her bra and panties on.

He stared at her hungrily. He quickly slipped his shirt over his head and reached down, quickly removing his sweatpants. He started to reach for her but she stepped back.

"No. All of it." She ordered.

Tony smiled realizing that he was clad only in his boxers. He quickly disposed of them and laid naked on the bed in front of her.

She smiled and climbed in next to him, taking him by the hand and pulling him into a sitting position.

He followed her lead, but shifted up the bed so he could rest against the pillows and headboard. Ziva straddled his lap using her hand between the two of them to gently massage his semi hard member. She continued her ministrations while grabbing his lips with hers.

His lips found that sweet spot between her shoulder and neck that had made her gasp earlier. Sure enough, there it was again. He smiled and teased her there for several moments before she pulled away.

"I- I want to show you how much I love you." She announced to him softly.

"Ziva, I know-" She silenced him with a shake of her head.

"Tony, this is for you as much as it is for me." She said.

Tony was confused but decided that he would follow her lead, as long as it didn't lead to anything that would hurt her. Of course, he didn't have much of a choice considering she was still massaging his now fully erect penis.

She moved away from him and laid down, turning on her side and bending her legs, almost into a fetal position. Tony sat and watched her for several moments, until she turned her head to look at him.

"Please?" She asked. "Earlier, there were blankets-"

Tony could feel her almost desperate need to be able to do this. He leaned down and kissed her forehead before sitting up on his knees. He placed his hand gently on her arm and turned her over to her back.

"Okay, but we do this the right way."

He reached down and unhooked her bra, allowing it to fall open. She sat up slightly to allow him to slide it from her arms. It fell to the other side of the bed, soon to be joined by her panties.

He then laid on his side and she did the same, facing away from him. He slowly slid behind her. Before the front of him met her back he reached an arm out and felt her trembling.

"It's okay. You don't have to do this." He assured her.

"Yes I do." She replied. To accentuate her response, she slid back farther, flinching when she felt his erection touch her buttocks.

He moved as close to her as he could, his heart breaking when he wrapped his arms around her and felt her trembling.

Tony reached around and took her hands in his, gently rubbing his thumbs across them. "See baby, it's just me. I'm not going to hurt you." He whispered gently in her ear. He continued whispering reassurances in her ear until he felt her trembled begin to subside a bit.

He kissed the side of her head when he felt her take his hand in hers. She bought them to her lips and kissed them gently.

"How do you feel?" He asked.

Her eyes slipped closed as if she was trying to sum up her emotions. "Frightened." she said, gently kissing his hand again. Her trembling stopped completely when she turned her head back and looked at him. "Cherished." She whispered, taking his lips with her own. She broke away momentarily and gently rubbed her butt against his erection.

"Horny." She finished her thought to punctuate his gasp.

Tony smiled. He gently massaged one of her breasts in his hand as he nibbled and chewed on her ear. She grabbed his hand away and thrust it town to the juncture of her legs.

"No playing-" She said with baited breath.

Tony was about to protest when her gentle reminder splashed cold water on him.

"Jake-soon."

Glancing at the clock, he realized she was right. He gently teased her inner thigh causing her to lift her leg up and wrap it back and around him. He slipped two of his fingers in his mouth and wet them before gently massaging the lips of her nether region.

One finger brushed against her engorged clit which caused her to flinch involuntarily. He purposely moved his fingers away causing her to sigh in frustration.

"Stop teasing me Robert." She hissed.

Tony stopped. "Robert, who the hell is Robert?" He asked, noticing her body shaking in laughter.

"Okay, if that's how you want to play-" He reached down again, this time using his fingers to rub small circles around her.

"Oh God-" She moaned before a small whimper escaped her lips.

He fingers disappeared again.

"Tell me you're sorry." He demanded gently.

"Make me." She sassed back at him.

He ignored the throbbing coming from between his own legs and began working on her again. The more he touched her the more responsive she became.

One of Tony's fantasies came true as he continued as he continued moving his fingers in a circular motion, Ziva's own hand came up and began touching her breasts as she moaned in time with his fingers.

"Tony- I'm-"

"You're what?"

"Cl-cl-" She mumbled.

"I think the word your looking for is 'sorry' Zee-vah."

"Sss-sss-yyy" She moaned as he felt her pulse beneath his hand.

Her breathing began to slow and Tony watched her coming down from her high in fascination. Once she'd calmed a bit, she rubbed back against him again.

"It appears you still have a bit of a problem Agent DiNozzo." She said a bit breathlessly.

She turned over on her back and pulled him over her, taking him gently in her hand and working the tip of his penis over her still thrumming clit.

She closed her eyes and stretched back on the bed as Tony's hand replaced hers, gently working her into a frenzy again. She felt that tingling feeling building again when suddenly they both froze.

Jake was awake and he was screaming for attention.

"Shit!" Ziva cursed as Tony fell away from her body.

He gingerly attempted to get up but she stopped him. "I will get him. I do not think you are in any shape to walk." She noted with a sad smile.

Grabbing a robe, she quickly wrapped it around her before disappearing out of the room. Tony knew the exact moment that Ziva got to his crib as the crying ceased instantly.

He flung himself back against the headboard and glanced down at the state he was in. Walking right now would not be a good idea.

Tony thought of everything imaginable to will his erection down. He finally felt like he was starting to get somewhere when Ziva appeared in the doorway, Jake laying in her arm looking at him with his bright brown eyes.

He grabbed the blanket and covered himself causing Ziva to chuckle. "Tony, do you really think he is going to know what we were doing?"

He smiled and shrugged. "Well, just in case."

Ziva shook her head and assumed their favorite nursing position; laying back against Tony's chest. Tony's earlier problem was forgotten as they focused on the baby, smiling down as he ate greedily, making small grunting sounds the entire time.

Ziva couldn't help but smile. "I am surprised he does not weigh 50 pounds with the way he eats." She laughed.

Tony chuckled. "He does have a healthy appetite. One of the books I was reading said that you shouldn't switch back and forth between the breast and bottle because it could cause confusion. He doesn't seem to have an issue with it."

She shook her head. "I think Jake will eat whatever you give him."

Tony smiled and kissed the side of her head. "Now, if we can just teach him about his timing, we'll be all set."

To Be Continued


	45. Chapter 45

**Wow, over 500 reviews. I'm speechless. I can't thank everyone enough. And please, keep reviewing! I need your thoughts/ideas to keep my muse going!**

**And a special thanks to the folks at TivaNation. If you're a TIVA fan and haven't checked out the Tony and Ziva board, I encourage EVERYONE to run and join now. They're the best group of folks in the world. You can find our happy home at cbs com, click on shows, NCIS, community, forums, The Shippers. Of course, click on the Tony and Ziva board. It's currently over 10,200 pages long. LOL If you're like I was and hanging onto your TIVA fandom by your fingertips, let these people pull you to safety. They did it for me, they can do it for you too. LOL**

**This is a weird chapter, a transition into the next phase of the story. It's a little short too, sorry about that. More goodness should be coming soon though!**

**And as usual, disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 45**

The rest of the day was spent caring for the baby and stealing moments together when they could. McGee had called Tony's cell to set up a time to meet with him to go over the details of his work is LA. Ziva took the opportunity and invited both Tim and Abby over for dinner.

Abby had been watching as Ziva moved around the kitchen. Tony occasionally would come behind her and wrap his arms around her waist, stealing a kiss from the side of her head as he whispered in her ear. Ziva's eyes would drift closed as if she was just absorbing Tony's closeness.

After dinner, Ziva had excused herself to go into the bedroom with her breast pump. Abby had gone with her so they could have some girl time, while Jake stayed with Tim and his Daddy.

After a few minutes, Tim sat back in his chair, moving the file away from him and watching Tony interact with the baby laying against his chest.

"You're really good with him Tony." McGee complimented.

Tony smiled slightly. Suddenly, his face took a serious tone as he stole a glance down at the baby. "I'll tell you one thing Tim, there's nothing in the world that I wouldn't do for this little boy."

McGee was taken back by the use of his first name. However, he let Tony continue.

"I've never felt anything more powerful than this…. Just sense… this emotion that comes over me every time Jake looks at me. I swear I feel my heart just skip a beat. It's just… incredible."

McGee allowed Tony's words to sink in. "And how are you and Ziva doing?"

The seriousness of Tony's conversation quickly disappeared only to be replaced by the Tony DiNozzo that McGee was used to seeing.

"We're good Probie." He said quickly, moving his arm to cradle Jake's head so he could grab a drink from his soda.

"Yeah?"

Tony leered at McGee. "I never kiss and tell Probie!" He said causing Tim to delve back into the work in front of them.

* * *

In the bedroom, Abby sat on the end of the bed while Ziva maneuvered the breast pump under the nursing blanket she was using to cover herself. Starting the machine, Abby flinched involuntarily causing Ziva to smile.

"It is really not bad at all Abby."

"Really? It looks scary."

Ziva shifted slightly to find a more comfortable position. "I was terrified of it at first. But my other alternative is to have my breasts engorged and achy all the time. That is not an option."

Abby smiled. "You and Tony look really happy."

Ziva smiled wistfully. "Things are… going well." She announced.

Abby rolled her eyes. "You guys are totally in synch with each other! It's like you feed off of each other. I hope I can find someone like that one day."

Ziva watched her friend for a moment. "Have you ever been in love Abby?"

Abby thought for a moment. "I thought I had been. But I watch you and Tony and then I have doubts. I don't really know."

Ziva smiled sadly. "Please do not let Tony and I be your role models. We have made huge mistakes over the years trying to figure our feelings out. And we are bound to make more along the way. But when you find that someone, you will know."

Abby smiled and nodded. "I'll remember." She promised.

* * *

Later, once their friends had left, the kitchen was cleaned, Jake was fed, bathed and asleep, Tony and Ziva had collapsed onto their bed in exhaustion.

"How can someone so small take so much work?" Tony muttered to no one in particular.

Ziva chuckled. "I have felt exhausted since I was seven months pregnant. It is just a new kind of exhaustion now." She admitted.

Tony put his arm around her and pulled her close, grabbing her lips gently. "Get some sleep." he told her.

She kissed him again but then sat up, gesturing to the tee shirt he wore. "Please?" She asked.

Tony smiled and slipped the shirt over his head. Ziva smiled and nestled against his bare skin, placing her hand on his chest and playing with strands of his chest hair.

"Do you think you can sit with Jake for a little while tomorrow? I want to go visit Josh-" She asked.

"Of course I can. I've got to get used to being alone with him eventually anyway."

She smiled and nestled closer against him. As she started to doze, she heard Tony quietly mutter;

"I even promise not to break anymore pieces off of him."

* * *

After a mostly sleepless night, Ziva felt pangs of regret in her heart as she kissed Jake and Tony goodbye. It was silly, and she knew it, but she couldn't help it. She'd faltered twice in the doorway, again on the elevator in her apartment before taking a deep breath and willing herself to keep walking.

Once in her truck and driving, she felt an immense sense of freedom. She hadn't realized how stir crazy she was feeling in her apartment.

At the hospital, she quickly obtained a visitor's pass and made her way to Josh's floor. Stepping off the elevator, she jumped and rushed to grab her cell phone as it started to ring.

"Is everything okay?" She asked quickly when she saw Tony's name displayed on her caller id.

"Everything is fine. I just wanted to see if you actually made it out of the parking lot." He replied.

She smiled guiltily. "Yes, as a matter of fact I am almost at Josh's room now. "

"Okay, well spend as much time as you want. We're fine. I haven't broken too many more things off so we're good."

She snickered as she heard the phone disconnect. She continued walking as she fumbled with her bag and getting her phone dropped back in.

Looking up, her steps faltered when she saw a woman walking down the hallway with her back facing her. She had medium brown hair which hung in waves just past her shoulder. Ziva stopped suddenly and stared as she disappeared around the corner.

'No, it cannot be-' she thought to herself. She had to be imagining things. The sense of that woman was very familiar to Ziva. She shook her head chastising herself.

'Now you are imagining things.' She thought.

Reaching Josh's door, she knocked gently before entering. Josh was dozing on the bed as Eden read from her Kindle.

"Ziva, what are you doing here?" She asked suddenly, looking very surprised by her presence.

"I came to visit while Tony sits with Jake." Ziva replied, looking at her life long friend strangely. Eden was acting very nervous suddenly and not making eye contact with her. "Is everything okay?" Ziva asked.

Eden looked at her and then to Josh. "As good as it can be." She replied, looking at Josh sadly. "He's asleep more than he is awake now." She explained.

Ziva nodded and sat in a chair opposite the side Eden was sitting on. Eden continued to act strangely as they chit chatted, causing Ziva to question her.

"Okay, why are you acting so strange?" She asked.

Eden shrugged. "I'm not."

Ziva raised her brows. "Yes you are. You cannot lie to me. You have never been able to lie to me."

Eden sighed and looked her in the eye. "I could never lie to you Ziva-" She started but a wheezing breath from the bed drew their attention.

"Hey you." Ziva said quietly, rising from her chair and moving closer to Josh.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" He asked weakly.

"Letting Tony and Jake have some guy time." She replied with a smile.

"Hey, I thought Tony was supposed to be in Los Angeles?" Eden questioned.

Ziva shrugged. "Change of plans. It is a long story."

Josh smiled slight. "Well, we're not going anywhere. But before that, I want to see new pictures of that son of yours. I know you have some."

Ziva smiled brightly and reached into her bag. "As a matter of fact, I do."

An hour later, Josh's eyes were drifting closed which was Ziva's cue to leave. She kissed him goodbye with a promise to come again soon. She examined Eden closely, using her eyes to tell her that their earlier conversation wasn't over.

Once Ziva left, Eden turned to Josh. "We have to tell her." She told him.

He sighed. "I know what your saying. But right now, at this moment in her life, I'm afraid it could do more harm than good."

Eden shook her head. "Josh, she has been lied to enough in her life. I will NOT do it. I won't be one of those people that betray her trust." She swore.

He looked away from her momentarily before nodding and reached out for her hand. "You're a good friend. She'll need you through the coming months."

Eden nodded. "I'll need her too. But I'm not going to let something like this come between us."

He squeezed her hand and turned his head, closing his eyes and allowing the guilt burn into his soul.

To Be Continued


	46. Chapter 46

**Hmmm… seems I stirred some people up with the last chapter. Hehehe While the pot is boiling, perhaps I should stir it some more?**

**And as usual, disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 46**

Ziva arrived home expecting to find the apartment in shambles and Tony about ready to pull his hair out. Instead, she was pleasantly surprised to find the kitchen and living room spotless, and not a sound emanating from within.

She closed and locked the door quietly, walking down the hallway. The nursery door was open so Ziva moved quietly to peer down into the crib. Jake was sleeping peacefully, his arms and legs sprawled out in all directions. She smiled and reached down to pull the blanket back over the baby.

The inner struggle within her again raged. All of the baby books, the so called "experts", said that newborns should be swaddled. However, Jake screamed bloody murder anytime his was wrapped in a blanket, even if is loosely. However, he didn't mind being covered up.

She thought back to something Amie had told her. "Look Ziva, I can tell you one thing, someone else can tell you another. But when it comes down to it, no one knows your child like you do. Trust your instincts, the rest will come naturally."

Jake hadn't managed to get tangled up in the blanket or suffocate yet. Everyday, she noticed him getting stronger and more in control of his movements. Settling for what she knew her son wanted, she pulled the blanket up and wandered silentlyfrom the room, pulling the door closed behind her after noticing the baby monitor was gone.

She walked into her room to kick her shoes off when she noticed Tony in her bed, sleeping much the same way Jake was. He was on his back, his mouth open as he snored gently. His arms and legs were sprawled out to the either side. She smiled and shook her head.

Glancing over at her pillow, she noticed the baby monitor laying on it, as if Tony was afraid he wouldn't hear Jake if he happened to wake up. After quietly kicking off her shoes and changing into a pair of yoga pants and one of Tony's tee shirts, she quietly took the monitor with her to allow Tony some much needed rest.

She glanced at the closed door of the guest room and sighed. Her trip to the hospital had saddened her deeply, yet also triggered her senses. Something was going on, and whatever it was, she was being kept out of the loop.

She trusted Joshua and Eden profusely. In all the years they'd been friends, neither had ever betrayed her in anyway. Perhaps her senses were just off due to hormones? That, mixed with the fact that Josh looked 100 times weaker today than he had just a few days ago could be messing with her mind.

She went to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of ice water. She pulled her laptop out and set it up on the table. She hadn't been online since before the baby was born. She planned to use the quiet time to update her Facebook page with pictures of the baby. She also had some planning to do.

As soon as the photos started uploading from her camera, various comments were being posted, most of them by an overly excited Abby who found the need to comment on every photo. Afterwards, she began working on her overflowing e-mails, and then, the thing she dreaded.

Grabbing a notebook and a pen, she opened up her bank account and began studying the numbers. She scribbled furiously and once she was done, frowned deeply.

Movement behind her drew her attention. She felt Tony's arms wrap around her from behind. She leaned back into his embrace, placing her arms on his and inhaling his scent deeply.

"What are you working on so diligently?" He asked quietly before kissing the side of her head.

She shook her head. "Just something I have been thinking about the last few days. Did you have a nice nap?"

"Yeah. I missed you next to me though."

She smiled and turned her head, kissing the side of his face. "I missed you too. My visit was… strange."

Tony let go of her and plopped into the chair next to her, casting curious glances at the notebook. "How so?"

Ziva started to speak, then stopped and creased her forehead. "You know, I do not know." She shook her head and smiled. "Perhaps I am imaging things. It just felt like Eden was acting… sneaky. Which is not like her at all. She is very forthright and honest."

"I hadn't noticed." Tony muttered causing Ziva to chuckle.

"How is Josh holding up?" Tony asked.

Ziva's smile faded. "Not good Tony. I have never seen his this weak. I left the hospital feeling the need to jump and answer the phone every time it rings because it could be the hospital calling to say-" Her voice trailed off. Tony reached across the table and took her hand.

"You know that I'll be here for you, right?" He asked as if concerned she had doubts.

She smiled a teary eyed smile. "Of course. I have no doubts about you Tony."

He looked satisfied with that answer. He let go of her hand and picked up the notebook she had been diligently scrawling across earlier. "So really, what were you doing?"

Ziva sighed. She closed the lid of her laptop and sat back in her chair, running her hand through her hair. "Just trying to figure out how I am going to make it."

"What do you mean?"

"I still have eight months left on my lease here. A three bedroom apartment was not an issue when Josh was going to be living here too. We were splitting the rent halfway. Now, I do not know if I will be able to afford it. Two incomes with a newborn baby is hard enough. Let alone one government salary. Not only do I have rent, but car payment, utilities, the normal cost of living, plus when I go back to work I will need daycare-" As she continued her verbal list she had started to speak faster and faster.

"Hey, slow down!"

Her mouth snapped closed and she looked at him guiltily. "Well, you asked." She said quietly.

"Ziva, you do know that I'm going to be more than just a figurative Father to Jake, right?"

She looked at him confused. "What I mean, is that I'm not just going to let him call me Daddy, but not take any of the responsibilities that come along with it." He paused for a moment. "Say, you and I had a little too much to drink one night, had a wild night of hot passionate monkey sex, and then you found out you were pregnant and had Jake. I would take not only personal but financial responsibility Ziva. In my mind, there's no difference in the way Jake was conceived. He's still my son."

She looked as if she was about to argue, but then stopped and smiled. She stood from her chair and reached for Tony's hand, leading him to the couch. He sat down and smiled when Ziva immediately climbed on and straddled his lap.

"You are an amazing man Anthony DiNozzo. Do not ever let you doubt that ever again." She whispered, her fact just inches from his. Their lips met gently.

He pulled back and looked deeply into her eyes. "Hey, for better or worse, richer or poorer, you're stuck with me kid."

She smiled. "You do not have to recite vows to me Tony. We are not getting married here."

He touched the side of her face gently. "Oh yes we are. The day will come when I put a ring on your finger Ziva. We're together forever now. If I thought you'd let me, I'd take you down to the courthouse tomorrow and let a judge marry us."

Her eyes fell for a moment. As she was about to respond, the sound of gurgling and baby grunts came though the baby monitor. Tony smiled.

"I'll get him."

He moved the speechless Ziva sideways to an open seat on the couch and jumped up, disappearing down the small hallway. Moments later, he reappeared with Jake tucked into his arms.

"Hey buddy, look who's home." Tony said, handing him off to Ziva.

Ziva smiled and talked gibberish to the baby. It wasn't long before Jake made it known what he wanted. Smiling and shaking her head, she lifted her tee shirt and expertly had the baby nursing within seconds.

She touched and massaged the baby all the while studying him. Tony noticed how quiet she had become and wondered what was troubling her.

"Ziva?" He asked. She lifted her head and glanced at him, quickly lowering her eyes back to the baby.

"Yes?"

Tony sighed. "What's wrong?"

"Noth-" she stared, then stopped. 'No, you have to be honest. Stop trying to hide your feelings from him!' She chastised.

"Why do you think I would not let you take me to the courthouse tomorrow?" She asked quietly.

Tony froze. "Ziva, I was joking-"

"So you do not want to marry me?" She cut him off. Her voice was not angry at all, yet Tony suddenly had the feel of a lead balloon in his stomach.

"Yes, yes I want to marry you. It's just… it's soon. We're still finding out way through our relationship Ziva. We're learning how to be together."

Ziva nodded. "That is true. I have never really thought about it until now." She pointed out.

"Then why did it bother you when I said that?"

She looked at him and smiled softly. "My first irrational thought was of joy. Having someone pronounce us husband and wife, the thought made me tingle. As for learning how to be together, to build a life together, that is part of what marriage is about, yes?"

Tony stood from his chair and walked over to her. He bent down in front of her and placed both hands on his knees. "Ziva, do you want to get married so soon?"

She smiled at him. "I do not know Tony. My own thoughts and feeling are not even making sense." She said with a tearful smile.

Tony reached up and tousled her hair. "I will admit. The thought of having you as my wife makes me tingle too. But this is forever Ziva."

Ziva checked the baby who suddenly stopped drinking as if he was listening intently. Ziva laughed inwardly when she turned her attention to him, he starting sucking again. It was almost as if he didn't want to be caught listening in on their conversation.

"Tony, we are forever, are we not?" She asked gently.

His answer was interrupted by a knock on the door. He dropped his head and groaned. "Perfect timing."

To be continued


	47. Chapter 47

**And as usual, disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 47**

Tony cursed the door for the third time on the short trip to open it. He placed his hand on the knob, but before turning it turned back Ziva.

"Ziva?" She raised her eyes to meet his. "You better believe that we are forever." He said softly, causing her to smile as she began burping Jake. Tony checked to make sure she had her clothing in order before opening the door.

"Hey Eden." He greeted, immediately stepping back to allow the Israeli entrance.

"Hi Tony." She said softly, walking in and smiling gently towards Ziva. "I guess I'm not interrupting anything?"

Ziva shrugged. "What could you possibly be interrupting?" She asked, eyeing her friend suspiciously.

Eden nodded and moved to sit on the sofa across from Ziva. She was quiet for a period of time causing Tony to say something to break the silence. "Do you want something to drink?"

She shook her head, turning her attention to Ziva and the baby. "I need to talk to you."

Ziva's brows raised slightly at her friend as she continued to pat Jake's back. "Something is wrong." She stated evenly.

"No, not necessarily. I just-" Eden started, then stopped. She sighed and smiled gently when Jake burped for a second time since she'd arrived.

Ziva looked to Tony for help. Catching her hint, he moved over and took Jake from her arms.

"This is ridiculous." Eden muttered before tossing her hair behind her shoulder. "When you got to the hospital today, I was a little surprised when you arrived."

Ziva nodded, her stomach clenching at the strange behavior coming from her friend. "I noticed."

"That was because Rivka had just left. I'm surprised you didn't run into her in the hallway."

Ziva froze noticeably causing warning sirens to go off in Tony's brain. He moved over and placed Jake in his bassinette.

Ziva was silent but staring daggers at Eden who stared back at her just as intently. "Rivka as in…. Ziva's mother Rivka?"

Eden nodded. Ziva's eyes became glassy but she didn't speak a word. She continued staring unblinking for several more moments.

"So, you have been keeping secrets from me too?" She spat before jumping to her feet and attempting to exit the room.

"Wait, hang on!" Eden started and moving lightening fast was able to streak past Tony and grab Ziva by the arm, spinning her around.

Another one with ninja skills.

Ziva pulled her arm away but stopped. "Wait for what Eden? For you to justify how this was what 'for my own good'?" She asked harshly.

"No, dammit Ziva. Just stop. I didn't know anything about her even being in town until I walked into Josh's room this morning and there she was. I haven't seen her for a long time. But Josh apparently has. If you want to be pissed, be pissed at him. I came right over here and told you the truth. You KNOW better than to accuse me of keeping anything from you!"

A lone tear escaped down Ziva's face. "I do not know what to believe Eden." Ziva didn't sound angry any longer, she sounded exhausted. Tony became worried and stood slowly ready to intervene if needed.

In a contrast to what he expected, it was Eden who suddenly looked angry. "How dare you." She spat.

Ziva shook her head and stepped back, but Eden would have nothing to do with it. "After all we've been through, all we've gone through together, this is what I get from you?"

Tony could see Ziva beginning to breath unevenly. He moved over and put his arms around Ziva's shoulders in support. She stiffened to his touch.

"Alright, let's calm down, take a deep breath and settle down a little. Don't upset the baby." He reminded.

Tony watched and muscles uncoiled in both women. Ziva walked back to her favorite chair, sitting quietly but not making eyes contact with either of the other occupants in the room.

Eden had sat on the sofa near Ziva, staring at her. "Growing up as children, who was it that was by your side every time you got in trouble? Who was it that sat and listened to you pour your heart out the first time you got your heart broken? Who was it that was by your side for two days using our bare hands to dig through rubble just to find Tali's broken body?" Eden held out her hands. "I still have small scars from the cuts. Who's shoulder did you cry on when you thought Tony didn't love you, and all your plans were for naught? Who WAS that Ziva?"

"You." She answered quietly.

"Me. I haven't ever asked for anything from you Ziva. Just your trust and friendship."

"Others have lied to me-" Ziva began to justify.

"Yes, others may have. But not me. And while I'm laying all the cards on the table, I need to get something else out."

Eden reached into her pocket and pulled out a letter of some sort. It was slightly aged and bent in half.

"Do you know how I felt when Michael died?"

Tony shifted in his seat. Ziva looked at her. Eden continued. "Do you know how it felt when I found out that Michael had died with you right there and you didn't even have the decency to call me? I got the news from Hadar. And I know that you had other things going on, but dammit Ziva, he was my brother. And as I was trying to sort out everything that happened I suddenly get this frantic call from Josh that you'd sent him a goodbye letter before taking off for Somalia. I didn't get a letter, or a phone call from you. And then I received word that you were dead. Why, why didn't your reach out to me?"

Ziva took a deep breath and looked her in the eye. "Because, at that time, you were the one person who could have stopped me."

Eden nodded. "I would've tied you to a chair until you listened to reason." She paused for a moment. "That was the last time I saw your Mother, until today. I was in your father's office yelling at him when she came through the door. She was screaming at him, almost out of control. I left the room and she disappeared again after that. Eli never spoke of it."

Ziva watched her curiously. "I am sorry that I did not call you about Michael. I could not deal with that part of him…. The fact that he was your brother. I could only see his betrayal."

Eden fingered the letter she'd been holding in her hand. She unfolded it, and Tony noticed the Hebrew writing across the envelope.

"It wasn't exactly like you think it was Ziva. Michael did care about you." Eden said softly. She handed the envelope to Ziva and sat back, allowing her friend to open it and read. Eden turned to Tony and explained.

"Michael left a letter for me when he came back to America to wrap up his mission in Los Angeles. He knew it was dangerous, and that there was a good chance he wouldn't return. So he left that for me to find in his apartment just in case."

Tony became concerned when Ziva began to cry openly. She refolded the letter and handed it to Eden. "He really did care for me." She said quietly.

Eden nodded. "He'd already agreed to take on the assignment your Father offered him. At first, it was nothing but an opportunity. But when the two of you started working together, and you became closer, he started falling for you. Not all of it was a lie Ziva. I could only assume that was why he started drinking so heavily. You're not damaged, or unlovable Ziva… you just had some pretty crappy people in your life. But you've gotten past all of that, and you're doing so well. Don't let the ghosts from the past destroy anything you have now."

Ziva continued to cry but she reached out, enveloping Eden in her arms. "I am sorry I accused you-"

Eden shook her head. "Believe me when I tell you, I was shocked when I saw Rivka there. Apparently she and Josh have been in contact for a while. I think he's been feeding her information about you. She had a picture of Jacob in her hand when she left."

Ziva saw back. "I should not be surprised. They were always close when we were kids. Just because I do not speak to my Mother does not mean Josh has to forget about her existence." she reasoned.

Eden sighed. "It makes me wonder though-"

"About what?"

"What other secrets is he hiding from us?" Eden asked.

Ziva shook her head. "I cannot think about that. I can believe that he did not tell me about my Mother because he knew how I would feel. I do not want to believe he is keeping more from me."

Eden smiled slightly. "You're right. I'm just suspicious by nature. It served me well in Mossad. And Rivka's not going to bother you. She said she knows how you feel and that you don't want to see her. She'll respect your wishes."

Tony began to relax when he saw Ziva wipe her face and nod. "There are too many other changes going on in my life right now. I am not ready for that."

Silence fell over the room for several moments. Tony clapped his hands together.

"So, Who's ready for lunch?" He asked.

The two women both shook their heads. "I see where Jake has picked up his appetite." Eden joked.

To be continued


	48. Chapter 48

**Sorry, short chapter today guys. I'm babysitting my two year old god daughter today. I'll probably be in a coma by the time she leaves. LOL**

**And as usual, disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 48**

"Agent Gibbs, I can take you over here!"

Gibbs looked up while standing in the long line at Home Depot to see one of the workers behind the desk calling for his attention.

Gibbs moved to the side and shook hands with Frank, one of the few employees he didn't mind dealing with.

"How've you been Frank?" Gibbs asked.

The man nodded and smiled. "Same old same old. Should be retired sitting at home in my rocker, but who can afford that nowadays?" The older man said with a bit of a cantankerous spirit.

Gibbs smiled. "I hear that."

"So, it looks like you're starting something new here? This is a different order than what I'm used to seeing."

Gibbs nodded. "Yeah. A special project for family."

Frank smiled again. "Well, I'll run into the back and bring it up for you. Your truck out front?"

Gibbs nodded.

"Alright, I'll be right up in a few." Frank disappeared from behind the counter and into the back of the store.

Gibbs stood at the side of the desk and waited. That was when he noticed a tall woman with long, curly brown hair staring at him. When she noticed Gibbs' stare, she quickly turned her head and rummaged through her purse, pulling out her wallet as she was the next in line.

Gibbs continued to stare at her. He'd never met her before, that he was sure. But she had an extremely familiar presence to her, almost as if Gibbs had met her in another lifetime.

She quickly paid for the items in her hand basket, a small tool kit and hardware to hang items on a wall. She smiled at the cashier who handed her the change and her receipt, and Gibbs' stomach clenched slightly.

'Ziva. Why does she remind me of Ziva?'

The strange woman began exiting the store towards the front doors. She threw one more quick glance over her shoulder and she startled a bit, noting the Gibbs had left the counter and was walking towards her. Her steps quickened and she disappeared through the doors. By the time Gibbs had wound his way through the other customers milling about, he'd lost sight of her. Looking around the bustling parking lot, she was nowhere to be found.

He sighed and went back onto the store. 'Either you're losing your mind or something very strange is going on here.' He thought.

* * *

Across town, Tony had just closed the door behind Eden when suddenly Ziva pounced on him. He was taken by surprise but quickly relaxed into her touch as he hands and lips were all over him at once.

Tony had barely gotten his arms around her when her hands suddenly were in the waistband of his pants and gripping him. This was nothing like her normal, gentle loving touch. This was crazy, almost frenzied.

Which triggered all warning sirens in Tony's brain.

He grabbed her arms at the wrists and removed them from inside his pants. He turned and still holding her arms, walked backwards down the hallway leading Ziva towards the bedroom. Once there, he let go.

She threw a feral smile and flipped her shirt over her head. Within seconds, her bra was gone as well and she was on him again.

"Ziva?" She didn't reply, so he tried again more forcefully. "Ziva stop!"

She flinched and pulled away.

"Don't you want me Tony?" She said seductively which caused his body to really begin to react to her.

He smiled slightly. "I want you every second of everyday. But this Ziva, what is this?" He asked gently.

She looked confused. "You do not know what this is?"

He shook his head. "I know that this is, it's just-" He bent to pick up his shirt that she had been wearing and handed it to her. "Here, you're distracting me."

She took the shirt from him but made no attempts to put it on. She smiled and stepped closer to him.

But he stepped back, no matter how much his body was screaming at him not to.

She stopped and sighed, pulling the shirt over her head.

"Talk to me Ziva." Tony gently nudged.

She pulled her hair out of the shirt then looked at him with teary eyes. "About what Tony? You obviously do not want me."

She began to turn and walk away from him but he snatched her by the wrist, pulling her back in front of him. She didn't struggle, which was a good thing.

"You know that's not true Ziva, so stop thinking it."

He sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her close, so that she was standing between his legs. When she didn't say anything more, he took her hand that he still had control of and placed it over his groin.

"You feel that? That's how much I want you. But Ziva, this isn't about attraction, or love. This is about you trying to use sex to forget about what's going on in your head. Why do you do that?"

A tear trailed down her cheek. "It is the only time I can forget."

Tony pulled her gently to him and she collapsed against his body, her face buried in his shoulder and she began to cry openly.

He held her tight, stroking her back and her hair allowing her to get it all out. The truth was, he was terrified. The two of them were definitely already in territories unknown. And Ziva, breaking down yet allowing him to comfort her, was definitely something new. He just hoped he didn't screw it up.

Tony comforted her gently for a long while. Eventually, her sobs began to subside, but she still said nothing.

He pulled her back towards the bed. She took the hint and crawled over to her side, turning onto her left hip so that she wasn't facing him. Tony sighed and pulled his legs up, sliding behind her and wrapping his arms around her frame.

"Don't hide from me precious." He whispered in her ear as he kissed the side of her head. She moved back against him, nestling into his embrace even tighter.

"I do not mean to." She said softly.

"I know. You're trying so hard to be open and honest with me. I'm going to get better with it, I promise. It just…"

She turned her head towards him slightly. "What?"

"You've shared so much with me. Now it scares me when you shut down." He admitted honestly.

She suddenly turned so that she was laying against his chest. "Thank you for telling me." She said, kissing him on the chin before tucking her head back into his chest.

'Okay, obviously she needs some more prodding before her opens up.' He thought.

"Did I every tell you about what started out as the best day of my life, at least up to that point in my eight year life?"

She didn't reply. She didn't need to. Tony knew he never told her.

"I woke up for school, hating the fact that it was Monday. My Mom had woken me early. She was smiling and cheery, cracking jokes and making me laugh as she opened all the curtains in the house to let the Spring sunshine come in. My Dad hadn't bothered coming home that night, but we were used to it. When I came downstairs to the kitchen, she'd made the most amazing feast. There were pancakes and waffles, bacon, sausage, eggs and toast. She let me drink chocolate milk and eat whatever I wanted. She'd packed my favorite lunch. Peanut butter and banana sandwiches. She even put a soda and chocolate in there. I thought I'd hit a gold mine. Mom was finally starting to see things my way."

He stopped speaking. Ziva could feel him breathing change and his heart rate speed up a bit under her cheek. She turned her face up and reached a hand up to touch his cheek in support. Finally, she settled back onto his chest, but used her fingers to trace gently circles across his chest.

"She drove me to school that day, and I was in top of the world. Part of it was all of the sugar I'd had, I'm sure. I didn't notice how strange she was acting. When I went to get out of the car, she stopped me and told me to 'be good'. She never told me that. But being eight, I never thought anything of it."

He stopped again. Ziva allowed him a few moments before he gently prodded him. "What happened?" She asked quietly.

"She usually picked me up from school. I waited and waited, but she never showed. So I ran home as fast as I could. I was weirded out by that point, the strangeness of the day starting to tumble through my brain. When I got to the end of our driveway, the gates were open-" His breath hitched momentarily. "There were police cars and an ambulance there. All I could see was their flashing lights. I ran towards the front door. One of the police officers grabbed me and wouldn't let me go in. I was fighting with him, struggling to break free but he wouldn't let me go. Sometimes, in my nightmares, I can still feel his strong arms wrapped around me as I fought him."

Tony glanced down and noticed Ziva's face turned towards him. "When I finally stopped fighting him, the cop, Officer Valentine, told me that he 'was sorry'. My Mom was dead."

Ziva's brows furrowed as Tony began to cry openly. She slid herself up on his body so that they were face to face. She gently kissed away his salty tears. He turned his face and caught her lips gently. She stroked the side of his face but allowed him the moment.

"She had uh- apparently after dropping me off… gone home and taken a bunch of pills. Then she climbed into the bathtub with a glass of wine and cut her wrists open. Our housekeeper found her hours later when she arrived."

Ziva gasped slightly She pulled Tony tighter and moved back, rolling them over so that he was on top of her. She clutched his face tightly to her chest and allowed him to sob openly.

"I am so sorry." She whispered, unsure if he actually heard her.

To be continued

* * *

**And the baby is here. Sorry guys. I'll try to get more up when she leaves, I promise!**


	49. Chapter 49

**Okay, Aldea came through her adventure in babysitting relatively unscathed. LOL Gotta love toddlers!**

**Okay, just a tiny chapter. This was actually suppose to be the end of the last chapter. LOL A longer chapter coming later today or tonight.**

**And as usual, disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 49**

Ziva allowed Tony the opportunity to grieve all over again. He clutched her desperately as sobs wracked his body. Ziva soothed and coddled him without words.

Tony felt her slight hiccup as she fought off her own tears which had started to fall. Tony lifted his eyes to look at her, bringing his hand up and wiping some of her tears with his thumb.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

Her brows furrowed. "You have nothing to be sorry for Tony. I love you so much and I hate that you went through that much pain."

He rolled to her side so that he was no longer crushing her beneath him. She, however, had no intention of letting him go. She rolled with him, her leg wrapped around his so that they were laying face to face.

Tony silently stroked her face for several moments as they stared into each others eyes, lost in each other and shut out from the outside world.

"I wish I had known you then." Ziva whispered wistfully.

Tony smiled slightly. "You would have punched me." He told her.

"Why?"

"Because I would have told you I liked you." He explained, reminiscing the story she'd told of her first fight.

She snickered. "True. But we would have gotten past it. I certainly 'like' you now."

Tony kissed her gently and continued stroking the soft skin of her cheek. "I never thought I could feel pain like that again. Losing Kate was bad…. But it felt unbearable when that cop told me my mom was dead. I never wanted to let anyone close to me again. I couldn't go through it again. But you…. You managed your way into my heart without me even knowing. I felt that stab of pain when the doors closed on the airplane in Israel. But there was still a chance… you were still alive. And then Gibbs told us you'd died on the Damocles-" His voice choked again and she quickly pulled him to her.

"I am so sorry I did that to you." she whispered.

He pulled back slightly. "I never thought I could feel that pain again. It wasn't just you Ziva. All of us played a hand in that mess. We all made mistakes… reacted badly…."

"Never again Tony." She leaned in an kissed him gently. "I never want to see another tear come from your eyes. We will fight, and argue, and probably fight some more. But I promise you here and now, I will never intentionally cause you pain like that again."

He felt his eyes beginning to sting again as he pulled her to him. They stayed wrapped around each other until he felt her body begin to relax. He pulled back and looked into her sleepy eyes.

"You're tired, why don't you get a little sleep. I'll take care of the baby."

"Okay." she smiled slightly but made no effort to move.

He stroked her cheek but stopped when she leaned into his touch. "I've never told anyone about that day."

She smiled slightly. "I can understand why."

"You were right. I feel… unburdened now. Thank you for listening."

She kissed him lightly again. "I will listen to anything you want to tell me Tony. Your memories are my memories. Your pain is my pain. We are in this together." She swore to him.

Tony leaned in and kissed her more deeply. "I love you more than life itself." He whispered.

"You are my soul Anthony DiNozzo. Do not ever forget that."

To Be Continued


	50. Chapter 50

**Hey everyone, so sorry for the delay. But, once I share my little story with you I think you'll understand.**

**None of you know me personally. And while I've chatted with many of you on the TIVA board at I've only shared part of this story with one person on that board. And that person kept it to themselves until I got a PM from them last Sunday night, telling me I can sleep well.**

**Almost ten years ago, I was having an early morning phone conversation with my fiancé who was on his way to work. We were living apart at the time but our wedding was just weeks away and we were both stressing over the final details. And, as was usual, his mother, my future mother in law, was on my last nerve.**

**As he and I talked on the phone that morning, his mother called and interrupted. I cracked a joke that she was going to be the death of me. He laughed (He loved to laugh) and said he would call me when he was on his meal break.**

**That was the last time I ever spoke to him. Because you see, he was a NYC firefighter and the date of that conversation was September 11th. The days immediately following those events still are a blur to me. I remember going to funeral after funeral after funeral. Sometimes, I can still hear the bag pipes in my dreams. I go to New York City now, and sometimes I swear I can still smell jet fuel. For weeks following the terror attacks, you could smell jet fuel in the city.**

**And his mother? She is one of my best friends, even to this day. We never had a body to bury. He was last seen running up a staircase in Tower 2. So, after work Monday I made the trip to his empty grave and again wondered just how many people he saved, and again hoping that he didn't feel any pain.**

**So, you can understand that this has been a weird and emotional week for me. I struggled to find the words for this chapter. I hope I was finally able to find them. And please let me take one more moment to implore everyone, please hug and kiss your loved ones. Take every chance you can to tell someone that you love them. And please, do not ever forget all of those souls lost on September 11t, and those who are giving their lives to prevent anything like that from ever happening again.**

**And for that TIVA fan who sent me a PM telling me I could sleep well. You were absolutely right. I've slept better this week than I have in a very long time. But it's not out of vengeance, or blood lust, but because I truly feel this crazy planet of ours has become just a little bit safer. And to that TIVA fan, thank you for thinking of me in that moment.**

**Now, enough emotional stuff. On with the story!**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 50**

Ziva was awoken by the sound of a screaming infant coming from the living room. Rubbing her face, she noted that Tony was gone (presumably with the baby) and Jake apparently wasn't happy about something.

Glancing at the clock, she realized she had slept almost three hours. She slipped from bed and padded into the living room. Tony was sitting on the couch, trying to give Jake a bottle. Jake wanted nothing to do with it. He in turn kept closing his mouth and screaming at the top of his lungs.

"Ah, come on Jake." Tony implored, trying again. No go.

"Need a hand?" She asked quietly.

Tony threw an exasperated look in her direction. "I don't know what's wrong! He just started screaming when I tried to feed him."

She held her hands out and took Jake from Tony, cuddling him to her chest. "What is wrong?" She asked him quietly, noticing that his screaming didn't diminish in the slightest.

Ziva moved Jake to her shoulder and felt his belly rumble. "Is that what it is? Is your belly upset?" She asked Jake who seemed to handle his new position better. She rubbed his back soothingly as she gently spoke to him.

"That's it? That's all it took? I've been trying to get him to calm down for half an hour!" Tony exclaimed.

She smiled. "He just wanted his Mama." Jake's body suddenly tightened up and an unmistakable noise was suddenly heard.

Tony cracked up laughing while Ziva made a disgusted face. "So that is what the problem is." She glared teasingly. "Did you teach him that?"

Tony threw his hands up in the air feigning innocence. "He must have inherited that from you."

She smiled and continued to rub and pat the baby's back. "You just wait." She threatened.

Tony's eyes widened before he began laughing again. He finally rested his head on the back of the couch and enjoyed the quiet.

"Well, his lungs are definitely healthy." He commented.

She smiled. "He is completely healthy." Again, another sound. "Well, just a little gassy." She corrected. Jake began to relax and tucked his arms and legs in tight. Ziva smiled and dropped her head down and allowed Jake to nestle under her chin. Her eyes drifted over to Tony.

"How do you feel?" He knew she wasn't asking about his situation with the baby.

He smiled slightly. "I'm not sure to be honest. I'm definitely glad that I told you. It just feels…."

Ziva completed his thought. "Ripping a bandage off of an old wound?"

"Yes. You think it's healed and not going to hurt and then….." He finished.

She nodded. "I have been doing a lot of that lately. But Tony?" He looked at her. "I am glad that you shared it with me."

He smiled slightly, noticing Jake's eyes closed. "I'm glad that I shared it with you too. Want me to put him down?" He asked gesturing towards the baby.

She shook her head. "No, I just want to hold him for a while." Tony nodded, noting the faraway look in her eyes.

"So, your Mom-"

"Rivka. Her name is Rivka." Ziva said briskly.

"Rivka." Tony repeated quickly.

Ziva turned her head slightly and kissed the downy hair on Jake's head. "I will never do to you what my mother did to me." She promised him.

Tony slid forward so that he was closer to Ziva. "What did she do Ziva?"

She took a deep breath. "We were always close when I was a child. Despite the fact that I was not growing up to be her ideal princess who liked pink and frilly dresses, she and I had what I thought was a wonderful relationship. She was at every dance recital or school show I was in. We could sit and talk about anything. Sometimes we would laugh so hard together that my stomach would hurt. Even after Tali was born I never once felt slighted or neglected by her."

She paused for a moment and kissed Jake on the head again. "The few times my Father was actually home, I used to hear them fighting. I could never make out the words, and when I could hear them, I did not understand. Finally, one day when I was nine, I came home from school and she had the car loaded. She told Tali and I that we were leaving, moving to another city. I asked when Papa was coming; she said that he was not. I remember crying and arguing with her. I did not understand why we had left the only home I knew. She had told me it was to keep us safe, but I still did not understand. I never felt in danger."

"After about a year, she started disappearing during the day. Finally, she told me and Tali one day that she was meeting with a bunch of important people, who wanted to talk to us about Father. He had sued her for visitation of Tali and I. She was fighting him in court. Tali and I told the truth and he was given shared custody. Sometimes Father was supposed to pick us up and would never show up. Other times he acted like the world's greatest father. He really began spending time with me, teaching me more and more about weapons and physical fighting. He tried teaching Tali but she would just laugh at him and play. But not me. I did not want to make him angry, so I listened to every word. I learned everything he taught me. Yet, the more time I spent with him, the sadder Mother seemed to become. Sometimes she would just look at me…"

She paused a moment to gather herself. "Over the years, I had become my Father's ideal daughter, all the while crushing my Mother's heart. But I longed to get our relationship back again, like it used to be. So, when I was in the army, there was this boy that I really liked. I went to Mother to try to talk to her about him. I was trying to tell her that I liked him… a lot… and thought that maybe we were going to go to the next step."

"Meaning sex?" Tony asked.

She nodded. "She immediately accused Father of teaching me to use my body to gain information. He came to see Tali and I and she met him at the doorway, screaming at him for teaching his daughter to be one of the whores under his command. I was absolutely mortified. But then I became frightened when I saw Father laughing at her."

"What happened?"

Ziva shrugged. "I had sex with the boy and it was horrible. It was his first time too and he did not really know what foreplay was. And worst of all, he did not know he had to be gentle, that you just cannot slam yourself into a girl when it is her first time-"

Tony covered his ears. "Not that Ziva! I mean, with your parents."

She blushed lightly. "Oh. I was not home a lot around that time. I started training with Mossad before I was even discharged from the army. I wanted to see Papa's proud face. And nothing made him happier than to see me excel at my training. And I thought that if I could become the best at what I was doing, that would make Mother happy too. In my mind it was a win win situation."

"It didn't work out that way?" He asked.

She shook her head. Kissing Jake again, she stood and laid him down In his bassinette. She came back over and sat next to Tony, laying on his shoulder and absorbing some of his warmth.

"I thought my relationship with my Mother was lost forever. Once I was fully part of Mossad, I got my own apartment. Tali used to come and spend one weekend a month with me when I was home. There was this new club that she was begging me to take her to for months. I refused. One weekend, she was at my apartment and I was running late. She snuck out and went to the club…"

Tony felt her body tense. He held her tighter. "That was the night she died." Ziva whispered.

He let her cry for a while, gently soothing her the way she had Jake earlier. She had started to settle when she turned her head and looked at Tony. "At Tali's funeral, she was inconsolable. Josh and Eden both had tried to talk to her, she didn't speak a word. I was standing with Father when suddenly, in the middle of the service she turned. She started cursing him, blaming him for all the pain our family was in. She pointed directly at me and asked him if he was proud of himself, that he had turned his daughter into a monster just like he was. She screamed 'I hope you burn in hell!' and fled. That was the last time I saw her."

"Oh my God, Ziva-" Tony began.

She shook her head. "Looking back now, I think she was screaming at Father. But then, at that time, I thought that she was screaming at me. She thought that I was a monster, so that was what I was going to be. I became closer to my Father more than I ever was. He finally told me that she had never wanted children… that getting pregnant with me had ruined her dance career. I believed him. I had no reason not to."

Tony caught the change in her tone. "You don't think that now?"

She sighed. "I do not know what to think. When Gibbs left me at the airport, Father instructed his driver to take me home. While I was there, I became restless, destructive even. I went into his office and began throwing things around; furniture, photos, anything was loose I threw. I had picked up this large vase that had a lid with it, and when I kicked it to the floor it broke open. Several envelopes fell out of it. They were bound together with a rubber band, none of them opened. They were all addressed to me with no return address. But I knew that handwriting anywhere."

"Your mother's?"

She nodded. "The earliest one was postmarked right after Tali's funeral. There were over two dozen of them."

"What did they say?" He asked.

She shrugged. "I do not know. I could not bring myself to open them. I had them in my pack when I marched into Saleem's camp. My pack was taken from me. I lost them all."

Tony kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry baby."

She smiled slightly. "When I was laying on that dirty floor in Somalia, I could not help but wish I could feel my mother's embrace just one more time."

Tony thought for a moment. "Why don't you ask Josh how you can get in touch with her?"

Ziva sat back for a moment then shook her head. "Too much time has passed. I have enough big events going on in my life Tony. There are some moments where I feel like I am holding on by a thread. I cannot have any more emotional upheaval right now."

Tony touched the side of her face. "Maybe someday?"

She didn't answer.

To Be Continued


	51. Chapter 51

**Thanks so much for all of the reviews, e-mails and private messages. The intention of my author's note was not to make anyone sad or upset, but to let you know why the last chapter was a struggle for me. And, of course, as I always have and always will, just remind people to remember everyone who has made sacrifices in one way or another.**

**And for those of you from foreign lands who wrote to me and didn't think your English was too great. It was perfect, and I felt your caring come through in every word. Again, thank you so much. I take every word to heart.**

**Now, on to our favorite couple yes? Well, at least in fanfic, because the Tony that's on the show right now is really pissing me off. ::sigh::**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" chapter 51**

Ziva had starting making an early dinner while Tony attempted to put the apartment back together. Balancing a baby in your arms and having him grab so much of your time, it had become too easy to just toss things aside and tend to him. So, tidying up was definitely Tony's chore of the night.

He glanced into the kitchen and watched as Ziva placed two trays of lasagna in the oven. Tony's brows furrowed but he did not ask why the double serving.

Jake had woken and immediately wanted to nurse, his earlier bout of discomfort apparantely forgotten.

Ziva settled into her chair and relaxed with her feet up as Jake drank greedily. She'd been reserved since telling Tony about her mother earlier and it was making him worry.

"Hey beautiful." He said sitting down on the couch and watching her with the baby.

She turned her attention to him and forced a small smile. "You do not have to clean up Tony." She told him.

He shrugged. "Well, I helped make the mess. Besides, we're in this together which means sharing the chores too."

"Would you like to do this then?" She asked with a glint in her eye, gesturing at the nursing baby.

He smiled. "Why am I thinking I wouldn't be too good at that. I bet it is amazing though." He said a bit wistfully.

She nodded. "I cannot explain the feeling… it feels as if there is just this forever bond between him and I. And that no matter what happens, it will always be there."

Tony sat back against the couch cushions. "Do you think that goes for you and your Mom too?"

She shrugged. "That is different. As a child, I thought that bond was there. But later in life, I was not so sure."

"Did you believe Eden? When she said she didn't know your Mother was in town?"

"Yes. Eden has never lied to me. Even when she knew the truth would hurt me. I trust her."

"And Josh?"

Ziva was silent, then sighed. "I do not know what to think. Josh did what I am sure he thought was best. Yet, he kept this secret from me for a very long time. Eden mentioned my Mother burst into Father's office when I left for Somalia… Josh had to have been the one to tell her, so the two of them being in contact is not something new. I just-"

"What?" He implored.

"I am not sure how to feel. If Josh kept that secret from me, what else has he not told me? I do not feel comfortable confronting him in his hospital bed. I want to be angry and not forgive him, yet at the same time he is still one of my best friends. And he gave me Jacob. I cannot forget that."

"It sounds like you have a lot of thinking to do." He commented.

She smiled slightly. "No, I do not. What is most important to me right now if right in this room. I will work through what to say to Josh. And Eden, I feel as if I need to make things better with her as well."

Tony's brows furrowed. "Why? She seemed fine when she left."

She shook her head. "I hurt her Tony. Large time. She was right. I should have been the one to tell her about Michael. I should have turned to her for guidance instead of marching off on a suicide mission. I did not even bother to say goodbye to her. And after all of that, she still gave up her whole life to move to America and help me with the baby. How do I ever repay that?"

"It seems to me that the only thing she is asking for is your friendship." He commented.

Ziva nodded and reached down to tickle Jake's cheek, causing him to begin drinking again. "Have you noticed that he does that?" She asked.

"What?" He asked, leaning forward.

"If we are having a serious conversation while he is nursing, he stops as if he is listening to every word we say. It is almost as if he is afraid of missing something."

Tony smiled. "Signs of a good investigator. Maybe his donor was a cop or something." He joked.

Ziva smiled. "No, all of the donors we narrowed the search down to were business men in one profession or another. One was a bank president, one a stock broker, another was a CEO of a hotel chain."

"Impressive. Well, he is definitely smart, so he's got two sets of good genes helping him along."

She smiled and stared lovingly down at him. "He has been with us for so little time, yet it feels like I cannot remember a time without him."

Tony stood and kissed her on top of the head. "That's because you're a wonderful mother. And you would never do to him what Rivka did to you. "

He disappeared down the hall as his words sunk in to Ziva. "No my little man. Mommy will never think of you as a monster." She promised.

By the time Tony had emerged from the bathroom, Ziva was having no trouble burping Jake. They both immaturely snickered when Jake burped rather loudly.

"I cannot wait until he is ten and the two of you are sitting around having a contest." She said teasingly.

"Ten? I think he can beat me now Ziva!" Tony exclaimed causing her to laugh.

She stood and handed him off to Tony while she fixed her clothes and went into the kitchen to check on the food. Satisfied that nothing was burning, she turned and leaned over the counter, watching Tony interact with Jake.

He was speaking quietly to him… so softly that Ziva couldn't hear. Tony then put a finger on Jake's nose, causing the baby's eyes to cross as he tried to focus on it. Tony then made a small "pincher" with his fingers and began tickling the baby.

Ziva smiled, amazed again that Anthony DiNozzo, self- proclaimed frat boy and movie buff, was a natural born father.

She continued to watch her boys for several minutes allowing them their bonding time. The sound of the oven timer broke her attention

She came into the living room and nestled up against Tony. He wrapped one arm around her and settled them onto the back of the couch.

"That smells amazing." He commented to her stealing another kiss from the top of her head.

"We can eat in a few minutes. The cheese just has to set."

Tony's stomach growled. Ziva snorted. "What am I going to do with the two of you?"

Tony held Jake up a bit so he was looking at Ziva. In a ridiculous, cartoonish voice he said "Just keep feeding us Mommy!"

Ziva laughed and leaned forward kissing the baby on the nose. She fell quiet again nestled under Tony's arm.

"What are you thinking?" He asked.

"How much I love you. How good it feels to be able to tell you and not fear the repercussions. How much I love my life right now… everything feels like a dream to me. "

Tony grinned. "So, did you used to dream about me a lot?"

She blushed. "Yes. I used to dream of you quite often. "

"Oh reeeeally?" He teased.

She smirked and leaned towards his ear. "Why do you think I kept a bottle of KY handy?" She whispered before standing and disappearing into the kitchen.

Tony watched her lecherously, swearing that there was extra sway in her hips. Tony looked down at the baby. "Jake, I don't know what I'm going to do with your Mommy!"

Ziva laughed to herself as she dished their food out. Jake was content to sit in his infant seat across from his Mommy and Daddy while they ate. After dinner, Ziva cleaned the kitchen while Tony bathed the baby.

Tony returned with a clean and freshly changed baby just as she finished. "I am going to go get a shower. I probably will not have time tomorrow since you have to go back to work."

He cringed inwardly. "Okay. We'll just hang out here."

She smiled and tousled his hair before disappearing down the hall. She took an extra long time, allowing Tony the alone time with the baby and just enjoying the fact that she didn't need to rush.

She returned towel drying her hair. Glancing at the clock she sighed. "I cannot believe it is time for him to eat already."

Tony looked at her concerned. "Do you want me to give him a bottle?"

She shook her head. "No. I do not want to swap him around today since his belly was upset earlier. I just feel like that is all I do now. If I am not breast feeding I am pumping milk. At the rate I am going, I will need a bigger freezer." She said smiling.

She lifted her top and much to Tony' appreciation, she hadn't bothered putting on a nursing bra. Jake latched on immediately but only seemed partially interested in eating. Ziva had expected that since he'd nursed longer the last time.

Tony pulled out his cellphone and called McGee to make sure he had everything he needed in Los Angeles. They chatted for several minutes. Tim couldn't help but tease Tony.

"You fled the city so fast you left your bags here. I'm assuming you want me to bring them back to DC with me when I come?"

Tony flushed. "I never even thought about them. If you wouldn't mind Probie. It should be just the one bag of clothes and a bag from the bookstore."

Once they had the baby settled into his crib Ziva collapsed into bed first. Tony snuggled in behind her, spooning around her. She tensed up slightly but eventually relaxed and scooted closer to him.

Tony inhaled the smell of her shampoo and sighed. "9:15 and we're in bed already." He mused.

She smiled. "We have to get as much sleep as we can. You have to go to work tomorrow and you know Jake will have me up throughout the night."

"Us up. He'll have us up." Tony corrected.

Ziva shook her head. "No Tony, you need to rest. Once this joint operation is completed, you will be able to use vacation time. Then we will split the night duty. However, for now, I will handle it."

Tony wasn't happy about the situation but he conceded to her point. He slipped his hand under her tank top and rested it on the warm skin he loved to touch.

She sighed in contentment and rolled over to her back. "Will you help me?" She asked.

His brows raised in question. She lifted her shirt up exposing her breasts. Tony smiled. "Have I told you recently that I love how shy you are?" He said causing her to laugh.

"Would you rather I keep covered up?" She asked.

"No!" He answered quickly causing her to laugh. She reached into the bedside table to pulled the protective balm and handing it to Tony.

"I remember this!" He said taking to tube from her and slowly and softly applying it. She folded her hands behind her head and reveled in his touch.

Satisfied that he was done, he put the cap back on the tube and tossed it on the table. He leaned down and stole a long, passion filled kiss from her. They broke apart but continued staring into one another's eyes.

"You're glowing." He whispered to her.

She smiled. "That is because I was able to take a nice, long, hot shower. You are lucky. I even had time to wash my hair AND shave my legs." To demonstrate her point, she ran one of her long, toned legs up his.

He smiled and rolled her on top of him. He buried one of his hands in her long mane of curls. "Can I ask you something?" He asked suddenly.

"Anything." She replied.

"Where did my Mossad nickname come from?"

She looked at him confused. "Nickname?"

"Agent Meatball."

Her eyes fell. "Where did you hear about that?"

"Rivkin told me when we were having a "mine's bigger" conversation."

"I can settle that. You are definitely bigger-"

"Ziva, please. You're trying to protect me like Josh is protecting you."

She sighed and pushed her hair to the side.

"Me. I was the one who gave you the nickname." She said sadly.

To Be Continued


	52. Chapter 52

**Ahhh… my muse is in a very good mood this weekend, so here's another chapter.**

**For those that asked, yes, Agent Meatball is canon. Rivkin called Tony that in the scene where Ziva met Rivkin for lunch and he was drinking pretty heavily. Tony called and told her she was needed back at the office, just so he could confront Rivkin and tell him to get the hell out of town. Yeah… we all know how that turned out.**

**As for EJ, do not fret. She and Tony will not be getting married. As a matter of fact, I don't expect their dalliance to last to the end of the season. Nor do I expect EJ to last to the end of the season. Personally, I'd be more worried about Ray than EJ. And again, I do not expect him to be around long. He may actually make it into Season 9 though…**

**However, look past what is so blatant in our faces right now. These scenes between Tony and Ziva have been AMAZING. They're so in synch with each other. And Ziva can't stand EJ, yet she isn't harping on Tony or pressuring him to dump her. Him telling Ziva that "he gets her" (EJ) put a knife in her heart. Everyone saw that look on her face. Yet, she has been Tony's sounding board. She is letting him make his own mistakes yet is waiting to help pick up the pieces. Watch the scene in "Baltimore" again, where Tony is playing the voicemail that Danny left him. Everyone is concentrating on the phone, Tony isn't making eye contact with anyone… yet Ziva is focused completely on Tony. She's staring at him with such love and understanding… it will make your heart clench! Some people at are saying that EJ is Tony's version of Michael Rivkin. And I can see that, wholeheartedly.**

**Don't fear Tiva fans. It's going to be rough in the next few episodes, but I suspect the payoff will be amazing. Like a "couldn't live without you" type of amazing. =)**

**As for Michael Weatherly commets about Tiva… I think he perhaps was trying to do some damage control. Earlier in the season he started talking about Tiva like he was all for it, which was a change for him because he never had been before. It makes him uncomfortable to do deep, emotional scenes according to Cote. And, scenes between Tony and Ziva are/will be just that, heavy, deep and emotional. It won't be getting a rub down in the shower. It won't all be filled with sexual innuendo. Because, let's face it, as much as we love SexyTiva, they are much more than that, and they have moved much further than that. I think TPTB expected the Tiva fans to hate EJ, but they did not expect the rest of the fans to despise her just as much. And, aside from the Anti-Tiva fans, I have not seen anyone anywhere that likes EJ one iota. I do believe those were the heart of MWs comments about Tiva. Besides, who cares… he's not a writer or Executive Producer. You know the old adage… opinions are like asses, everyone has one. g**

**Now, as for some of the other comments he made in that same interview… I am NOT happy with him. I would hope he was misquoted but until I see evidence of that I am not happy. Those type of comments coming from someone who works with two foreign born co-stars, has millions of fans outside of the USA, and married a woman with a clearly foreign name…. those comments were hurtful and just plain rude. I am now focused on the fact that it's Tony and Ziva I adore. Michael and Cote are two completely separate individuals. If I can like the actors playing the roles, then great! But if the actors prove to be arrogant jerks well then so be it. That is all I will say about that.**

**And who was it that said bring back Damon Werth? Nononono. Now you upset Aldea. Aldea HATES Damon werth with a passion. He reminded me of a jarhead. You know, one of these muscle bound guys who only know 5 words. Ziva needs someone she can have a real conversation with, not a man who will only give her grunts or one word answers. Sorry, was not a Damon Werth fan… at all. I actually liked Rivkin more than Werth.**

**ducking flying objects Okay, now, off my soapbox and on with the story!**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 52**

Tony immediately pushed Ziva from on top of him and sat up, throwing the blankets back and sitting on the edge of the bed.

"That's what you thought of me?" He asked softly.

She crawled up behind him and put her hands on his shoulder. "No Tony, not then. That nickname was born long before I had ever even met you."

He turned and looked her at, a puzzled look on his face.

"The first time Ari infiltrated NCIS, he needed profiles on everyone he could possibly encounter. I was his control officer. It was my job to provide that to him."

Tony didn't say anything further which prompted Ziva to continue. "All I had to go on was reports, second and third hand accounts. I could not have been more wrong about you."

He turned his face and she noted a small, forced smile. "Thanks." He muttered, kissing the side of her cheek and laying back down in bed.

She sighed and slid herself on top of him again. "Tony, do not shut down like this."

"I'm not-" he began to protest but she stopped him with a look.

"You are. Tony, I saw how accomplished an investigator you were the first time we worked a case together. Remember at the Smithsonian? You and McGee were goofing off, taking pictures and not paying attention to anything. I could not believe it. And then Gibbs came in and you just started telling him all of this information. I had no idea how you had come across any of it. I knew nothing and felt like a fool when Gibbs asked me." She touched his cheek softly. "I was wrong. You give this impression of being a goof ball, the class clown who is just there for looks. But there are so many layers to you. Even after all this time I am still discovering them."

His eyes were a bit glassy at hearing her words. He kissed her gently and took her hand in his. "Apparantely Michael didn't think so."

She sighed. "Michael had no idea. He had that initial impression of you. I did not do anything to change that."

"Why?"

She looked away for a moment. "I was trying to build a relationship with him. I could not risk him seeing how much I was in love with you. It was easier to pretend that you were everything I was not, and that there was no connection between us at all. But, I still think he saw through that."

She felt him begin to relax under her. "You are the best investigator I have ever met Anthony DiNozzo."

"Better than Gibbs?"

She nodded. "Better than Gibbs. You fool people, lull them into a false sense of security around you. You give them the 'Agent Meatball' impression then go in for the kill. I love watching you in interrogation. You are an absolute artist."

Tony wrapped his arms around her and rolled her under him. "Liar. But I appreciate you saying that."

"I am not lying Tony." She said with a smile.

His face softened as he began to grin. "Thank you."

She kissed him fully on the lips. "There is no reason to thank me Tony. I am only telling you the truth."

He rolled onto his back bringing her with him. She nestled against his side, sliding her hand inside his shirt so she could play with his chest hair. Tony in return slid his hand inside the back of her tank top, gently rubbing circles on her back.

"Why did you not say something sooner?" She asked quietly.

He shrugged. "I put it in the back of my mind. I guess talking about Michael earlier reminded me of it."

She turned her face to his. "That is not true Tony. It has been bothering you for a while. I can tell."

He smiled. "My own human lie detector." He sighed. "You're right. It has been. But it helped me beat Eli in an interrogation. It was worth it."

She smiled. "I have never seen my father get so flustered. You really threw him off balance. It was perfect."

"Just like you are." He grabbed her lips. "My perfect ninja."

She smiled and kissed him again. "Sleep Tony. It will not go over well if you fall asleep at your desk tomorrow."

"I miss having you sitting across from me." He admitted.

She smiled. "I will be back there in a few weeks. Besides, now you get to come home to me everynight… and wake up with me every morning."

He smiled. "And that is so much better."

The following morning was pure hell. Jake had been awake more times than Tony could count. He tried to help Ziva but she forced him to stay in bed. He'd watched as she stumbled out of the room again, tripping over her own feet in exhaustion.

When his alarm had gone off, every exhausted muscle in his body twitched in response. Feeling Ziva against his chest, he quickly turned it off to allow her a few extra minutes of sleep. He wiped his eyes to force himself to wake up.

That was when he realized his chest was soaking wet. 'What the hell?' he thought.

Looking down he realized that Ziva must have been snoring at some point. She had drooled all over him. And apparently her breast feeding throughout the night hadn't been enough. Her breasts had also leaked milk on him.

He tried to slip out of bed gently so not to rouse her. He didn't even have the blanket back yet when she moaned. "Is he awake again?" she mumbled.

He smiled. "No. I have to get ready for work. Just sleep." He whispered, kissing the side of her head and smiling when he realized she was already back to sleep.

Tony slipped his wet shirt off and dropped it into the laundry. He half-stumbled into the kitchen and sighed, glancing at the coffee pot. Making a pot of coffee would take too much time and too much ambition.

He started stumbling towards the shower. Glancing into Jake's room, he saw the baby was awake again and getting ready to scream. His fists were balled up and he was drawing his legs and arms in. Tony bee-lined towards the crib.

"Hey hey little man. It's okay. Daddy's right here."

Jake relaxed immediately and looked lovingly at Tony, who couldn't help but smile at him. Tony lifted him into his arms and snuggled him close to his chest. "You really put Mommy through her paces tonight." Tony told him as he went back into the kitchen. Checking the fridge, he saw that Ziva had left a bottle in the fridge.

"Hey, it looks like Mommy was reading my mind again." He said, balancing Jake in one arm and pulling the bottle from the fridge. He put the bottle on the counter and pulled the bottle warmer closer. He smiled and noted that Ziva already had the water set in it for him. He put the bottle in and pressed the button.

Walking Jake back to his room, he quickly changed his diaper and swapped his PJs for a for a blue jumper with a baseball and bat on it.

The bottle was ready by the time he returned to the kitchen. Glancing at the clock, he cringed. "Jake, I hope you eat quickly or else Daddy is going to be late for work. I don't have the heart to wake Mommy up again."

Jake looked up at him with a glint in his eye. We'll see about that.

* * *

Gibbs glanced at the clock and smiled to himself. 8:15 and he'd just gotten the text message from DiNozzo that he was on his way. 'Parenthood, get used to it Tony.' He thought to himself.

The ringing phone on his desk this early in the morning was not a good sign. He snatched it harshly from it's cradle.

"Yeah?" He answered.

"Agent Gibbs, it's Adam from security. I have a woman here to see you."

"Who?"

"I don't know. She won't give us her name, but she asked for you by name."

Gibbs sighed. It was going to be one of THOSE days.

"Send her up then."

"Uh, I would Sir, but she won't come upstairs. She's insisting on you meeting her down here."

Gibbs sighed, but at the same time, he couldn't help but be intrigued. "Alright, I'll be down in a few."

He hung the phone up and grabbed his coffee briskly crossing the bullpen to the elevator, hoping it wasn't one of his ex-wives. Once down on the first floor, he walked towards the security desk where Adam was sitting. Seeing no one standing around, he held his arms out to Adam.

"Well, where is she?" He asked.

Before Adam could answer, Gibbs heard a distinctly accented voice behind him.

"Behind you Agent Gibbs."

To Be Continued


	53. Chapter 53

**Okay, first for the unpleasantness. For those that asked for a link to the MW interview, I don't have it. I never save links to articles. I'm sure that if someone has the link they'll share it. I rather just forget about it and move on personally. LOL**

**Secondly… how about "Swan Song"? Just when some people have given up on Tiva, we get a hug, facial caress and almost kiss! OMG I was squealing like schoolgirl! Like I said before, do NOT give up folks! It's coming and it's going to be fabulous!**

**And third… I'm on vacation for the next week. Which means… hopefully lots of writing time. Be nice to my muse and she just might perform. LOL**

**And lastly… usual disclaimer applies. Just a little teaser chapter tonight….**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 53**

Gibbs turned slowly and was surprised to see the mystery woman from the previous day.

He eyed her warily.

"And you are?" He asked a bit harshly.

She smirked slightly. "Surely you must know." Gibbs took a deep breath in exasperation causing her to continue; "After all, you did try to follow me."

Gibbs stepped closer. "I followed you because you were staring at me!"

Her dark eyes narrowed as she stared him down. The expression caused Gibbs to pause. It was all too familiar. Not sure what else to do, Gibbs spread his hands out.

"Well, you came here to see me…"

She watched him closely for another moment. She then smiled slightly and held out her hand. "My name is Rivka."

Gibbs was exasperated at the strange woman but shook her hand gently. "Rivka. As in Rivka David?"

Her brows rose but she nodded. "One in the same. I guess you have heard horrible things about me."

He shook his head. "No. I only know you from Ziva's personnel file. "

Gibbs noted the slight change in Rivka's expression at the mention of Ziva's name. "My daughter does not talk about me. I suppose that is what is best."

He was intrigued at the myriad of emotions that danced across her features. Realizing the mere mention of Ziva's name pained her, he changed the subject.

"So, you came here… why?" He asked.

Her expression changed quickly back to the mischevious woman with a glint in her eye that had first greeted him.

"I came to apologize. When I heard your name yesterday I figured it had to be the Leroy Jethro Gibbs I had heard so much about. I should have come and introduced myself to you then. I am sorry for my strange behavior."

"Why didn't you?" He asked taking the last sip of his coffee.

She thought for a moment. "I panicked. I was not prepared to face anyone else in Ziva's life right at that moment. I have been living here for over year and have never come across the situation. It was a bit of a shock. And for it to be the man who has become Ziva's only parent…"

Her voice trailed off as her eyes became a bit glassy. She smiled sadly at him. "Again Agent Gibbs, I apologize. I am sorry to have bothered you. Good day."

She walked past him quickly and began heading towards the exit. Gibbs watched her go momentarily before he kicked into gear and jogged after her.

He touched her arm causing her to stop and turn. "Do you want to get a cup of coffee?" He asked.

Her face again held none of the emotion that had adorned it just moments before. Gibbs was again taken back by the resemblance between mother and daughter. Ziva was the only woman on the planet who could mask her emotions so quickly… or so he thought.

She smiled. "Sure."

They exited the building and walked across the courtyard to the coffee stand. Gibbs appreciated the fact that she liked her coffee strong and black.

They moved to sit on a bench facing the NCIS building. "You said you've been living here for a year?" He asked quietly.

She nodded as she grabbed a sip of coffee. "Yes. I have been Josh's business partner for years. When he moved the business here last year I came with it. Ziva did not know I was so close."

Realization dawned on him. "That's why you didn't want to come upstairs… you were afraid Ziva would be there."

Again, the sad smile. She didn't make eye contact with him but stared at the building instead. "I would hope she would be home enjoying her maternity leave. But knowing my daughter, she would strap the baby on her back and haul him right in there. Plus, I know that Agent DiNozzo has suddenly taken a larger role in her life."

Gibbs smirked and took a drink. "Nothing sudden about it. The two of them were inevitable. It's been coming for a long time."

Rivka nodded and turned to him. "Is he a good man?" She asked quietly.

Gibbs turned his blue eyes to meet her mocha ones. "Yeah, he's a good man. He's been good for her." Another drink of coffee. "They're good for each other. Ziva is very happy."

A lone tear quickly escaped Rivka's eye. "And he is willing to be a Father to a baby that is not his?"

Gibbs nodded. "He loves that little boy like he is his own. No doubt about it." Gibbs watched her for a moment. "I guess you have some experience with that."

She nodded. "I tried. I do not think there was much I could do for Ari by the time he came to live with Eli permanently."

"Well, Jacob won't have that problem. Ziva is a wonderful mother. And Tony, he loves both of them a lot. It'll be tough but they'll be okay."

Rivka smiled brightly. "Thank you for the reassurance."

Gibbs nodded his head across the street towards Tony who was rushing across the sidewalk. "If he screws up I'll smack him into next year."

She caught his gesture and glanced across the street. "That is him?"

Gibbs didn't reply. He sipped from his cup instead. "Rushing in late. Having a newborn caught up to him this morning."

Rivka smirked. "Well at least my daughter has a good eye."

Gibbs smiled softly. "I guess I'm lucky he showed up at all. He's so wrapped up in Ziva in the baby that his head has been in the clouds for days."

He noted that his words seemed to bring further reassurance to her. She took a long drink from her coffee cup. "Well, thank you for the coffee Agent Gibbs. I am sorry that I took so much of your time. And again, I am sorry about yesterday."

He waved her off. She stood and put her hand out. "Please Agent Gibbs, do me one favor. Please do not tell my daughter that I was here. I do not wish to cause her further pain."

Gibbs wondered exactly what had happened between Rivka and her daughter. "If she asks, I won't lie."

Rivka smiled as she shook Gibbs' hand. "She will not ask. I may not have spoken to her in over ten years. But I do know my daughter."

She turned and quickly strode towards the visitor's parking lot. Gibbs stared after her, frustrated and enthralled at the same time.

To Be Continued


	54. Chapter 54

**Ahhh vacation, glorious vacation!**

**WOW, Chapter 54. This thing is turning into an encyclopedia. Thanks again for all of the reviews! I love that I have everyone wondering what's coming next. Some of you will get pay offs… some won't…..**

**Usual disclaimer applies!**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 54**

Tony sat at his desk using his hand to hold his head up. His eyes continued to drift towards the closed side, especially with how quiet it was in the bullpen.

McGee was in Los Angeles, Ziva of course on maternity leave and not due back anytime soon. Gibbs was… he wasn't sure where Gibbs was. He knew that he was somewhere close by noting the papers strewn across his desk. But where the elder agent had disappeared to was anyone's guess.

He stared longingly at Ziva's empty desk, wishing he were home with her and the baby instead of here. Sighing, he punched at the on button for his computer, figuring he could at least make it look like he was trying to get work done.

The elevator ding prompted him to sit up a little straighter, especially considering how quickly Gibbs came strolling off. Tony readied himself for the tongue lashing he was sure he was going to get for being late. Instead, he was pleasantly surprised when Gibbs plopped a large cup of coffee down in front of him, patting his shoulder gently before moving to his own desk.

Tony stared at him for a moment. His gesture meant the world to Tony. 'I know. I understand.'

Gibbs looked quickly to Tony who tipped his coffee cup in his direction to show his appreciation. Gibbs smirked and busied himself with paperwork.

"So, what's on the agenda today, Boss?" He asked.

Gibbs shrugged. "Not much considering we're two people down. Unless Callen's team is ready to move, I figure we'll just keep working old case files."

Sighing, Tony nodded. This was going to be a boring day indeed.

About twenty minutes into work, Tony heard Gibbs sigh. Looking over at him, he noted that Gibbs seemed torn about something.

"Everything okay boss?" He asked.

Gibbs took his glasses off and laid them on his desk. Grabbing his own coffee, he strode towards Tony's desk, instead opting to lean against Ziva's desk. He sipped his coffee before speaking.

"Did you know Ziva's mother is in town?"

Tony looked at him in surprise. "Yeah, we just found out yesterday. How did you know?"

Gibbs shrugged. "I ran into her. She introduced herself. " Gibbs watched Tony closely. "She also led me to believe that she and Ziva don't have the greatest of relationships."

Tony nodded slightly. "They haven't spoken in over ten years. " Tony thought for a moment. "What's she like?"

Gibbs shook his head. "We didn't speak that long. But I think she loves her daughter, and misses her."

Tony studied him for a few moments. "Ziva told me what went down between them. She was a bit shocked to find out she was here. But I don't think she's ready to see her. She has enough going on right now."

Gibbs nodded. "Rivka isn't pushing anything. She said she's been living here in DC for over a year. She hasn't approached Ziva yet, I guess she's not going to anytime soon."

Tony sighed. "I'll talk to Ziva again about her. She didn't react well when she found out Josh kept the truth from her. "

Gibbs began moving towards his desk again. "You take care of her DiNozzo."

Tony sighed again. Could their lives have gotten any more complicated?

* * *

By lunch, Tony was crawling out of his skin. Instead of jumping up and running to the closest fast food joint, he placed a call home to check on things.

"Hey beautiful, how is everything?" He asked when Ziva picked up the phone.

He could hear the smile in her voice. "Fine. We miss you."

He smiled at the phone. "I miss you guys too. How has he been today?"

Ziva chuckled. "Hungry. But we did go out and run some errands. He was an absolute angel. People at the grocery store could not get enough of him."

Tony smiled. "Well that's because he's the most beautiful baby ever born!" He announced jokingly, as if he needed to tell her that.

She laughed. "Well, he is sleeping now. Hopefully for a couple of hours so I can get some sleep as well."

"Go rest precious. When I get home I'll heat up the leftovers from last night."

She was quiet for a moment. "Home?"

He paused, realizing what he had said. He lowered his voice and turned his chair around, hoping to keep his next words private. "Yeah, home." He stopped. "How does that make you feel?"

She was quiet for several seconds. "It makes me feel very happy… and relieved."

"Relieved?" He asked.

He heard the smile in her voice. "I thought Jake would have scared you away last night."

"Not a chance. We're in this together. And once I'm on vacation it'll get a little easier. I promise."

"I know. I am exhausted, yes. But Tony, I am so happy right now… sometimes I feel like pinching myself to make sure it is all real. I do not think it can get any better than this."

He smiled. "Ziva, we're together, we've got a perfect little boy… nothing is going to take that away from us. "

"Promise?" She asked in a small voice.

"I'll go to the end of the Earth for you Ziva." He said softly.

"You already have." She whispered a bit tearfully.

"Baby, don't cry. You're breaking my heart."

"I am sorry. I am just tired. "

"No, you're speaking the truth. You're right, I went to the end of the Earth for you once, I would do it again in heartbeat. All you have to do is ask."

"I love you so much." She replied.

"I love you too. Now, go get some sleep. I have to get back to work before Gibbs catches me."

"Have a good day."

"I will. I love you." He said gently before closing his cellphone. His face bore a wistful smile that he couldn't seem to shake. He turned his chair back around to face his computer and stopped immediately when he saw Gibbs standing at the edge of his desk staring at him.

"Boss! I was just…uh…."

Gibbs rolled his eyes as Tony fumbled over his words. "Vance wants to see us upstairs." He announced striding towards the staircase trying to fight off the proud smile threatening to reveal itself.

He could hear Tony on his heels as they entered Vance's office. Vance motioned to the chairs in front of his desk.

He looked at the two men sitting in front of him. "Well gentlemen, it seems as if we all have some decisions to make."

Gibbs and Tony exchanged glances before turning back to Vance. "What do you mean?" Gibbs asked.

"It seems as if Agent DiNozzo has a fan in human resources. They've received word that he's a brand new Father and wanted to point out to me that he's eligible for paternity leave."

DiNozzo shifted in his chair. "Well, I was going to use some vacation time-"

Vance shook his head. "There's no need. You're eligible for Family Medical Leave. Agent David has tacked on her vacation time at the end of her maternity leave. I'm sure we could work something out if you wanted to do the same."

Tony thought for a moment. "Sir, thank you for the offer. But I think I'll save my vacation time. You never know when I may need a day here or there in case the baby gets sick."

Gibbs' proud smile returned. "Spoken like a true Father."

Vance nodded. "If you only knew the half of it DiNozzo. Between gas, colic, teething…"

"And that's just the first year." Gibbs added.

Tony looked at both men then smiled. "It's all worth it."

Vance smiled. "That it is Agent DiNozzo." He turned his attention to Gibbs.

"I can't have your team out of commission for so long. We're going to have to bring in at least one replacement once McGee returns from Los Angeles."

Gibbs looked at him, his gaze unyielding. Suddenly feeling a bit guilty, Tony interjected. "How about Dwayne Wilson?" He suggested.

Vance looked impressed. "He has been looking for a transfer to the DC office. Once the stint with MCRT is completed, I'm sure I can find a place for him. What do you think Gibbs?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Agent Wilson will be fine."

Vance clapped his hands together. "Then it's settled. " Vance handed a file to Tony. "These are the papers. You just need to fill in the dates and sign them, return them to human resources."

DiNozzo took the folder, nodded to Vance and exited the room. Gibbs began to follow but stopped when Vance spoke again.

"That young man will be a great Father. Bad luck for you though."

Gibbs' brows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"Agent David just went on maternity leave, and now DiNozzo has a new baby. Bad timing for you."

'He doesn't realize.' Gibbs thought, trying not to laugh.

"It was expected though. After all, Agent David's son and Agent DiNozzo's son are in fact, one in the same."

The shocked expression on Vance's face made Gibbs wish there was a hidden camera in his boss' office. He would have LOVED to have been able to watch that one moment in time over and over again.

* * *

Tony ran down the steps as fast as he could and jumped into his chair. Opening the folder he briefly skimmed through.

Six weeks. Six glorious weeks home with Ziva and Jacob!

Gibbs came down the steps moments later with a large smile on his face. It unnerved Tony.

"What are you looking confused about DiNozzo?" He asked.

"Well, I'm not sure what to put down as my starting and ending date. I won't leave until this joint op is completed."

Gibbs nodded. "Go Speak to HR, see what they have to say."

Tony nodded and grabbed the folder almost skipping his way to the HR office. Before he could enter, the door opened and one of the tech agents from the evidence garage came out looking a bit stunned.

The term "shell shocked" was more like it.

Tony smiled to himself. 'Delores Brumstead must be in rare form today.' He thought.

He plastered his infamous "DiNozzo smile" and pushed the door open. Sure enough, Delores was the only one in the office at that moment. She was scowling deeply at her computer, and the scowl deepened when she raised her eyes to see who had interrupted her work.

Her scowl turned to a smile when she saw who it was. "Agent DiNozzo." She greeted, standing from her desk.

"Hi Delores, I'm sorry to interrupt, but I had some questions about my leave papers."

She took the folder from him as he explained his dilemma. She nodded. "Well, normally we would have to input the start and stop dates for your leave, so there's not a disruption in your pay."

She looked around, almost in a sneaky manner. "But for you, I'll take care of it myself. Just give me a call when you're ready and I'll handle it to make sure there's not a problem."

Tony smiled. "Thanks Delores. Want to see a picture of the baby?"

Without waiting for a response, he pulled out his cellphone and flipped it open to show off his wallpaper, a picture of Jake staring straight at him as he snapped the photo, his hands pulled under his chin as if he were posing.

"Oh, he's beautiful. He looks just like you." Delores gushed.

Tony's brow furrowed. He started to correct her but then stopped, a slow smile spreading across his face.

"Do you think so?" He asked.

"Absolutely!" She agreed.

* * *

Back in the bullpen, Gibbs' gut was working overtime. Something was still bothering him regarding the introduction of Rivka David into his life.

He sighed and looked around the empty bullpen. Tony returned a few moments later, a happy look on his face. Gibbs stood up suddenly, grabbing his suit jacket and tossing out his coffee cup.

"I'm going out for the rest of the day. Check in with McGee, make sure everything is still on schedule. Then go home."

"Early boss?" Tony clarified.

"Yeah DiNozzo. You look like hell."

To Be Continued


	55. Chapter 55

**The finale is tonight! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**

**Ahem…**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 55**

After leaving work, Tony ran one impulsive errand before returning home to Ziva and the baby. As he unlocked the door, he was glad there was no sound coming from inside.

He tip toed in, quietly locking the door behind him and putting his backpack on the floor. No sign of anyone in the living room.

He kicked off his shoes and picked them up, moving down the hallway and peeking into Jake's room. The baby was awake, Tony could see him trying to lift his head up. He smiled and continued to watch. Suddenly, as if he'd been able to do it all along, Jake moved his head from one side to the next, finally focusing his eyes in Tony's direction. He couldn't help but walk over the edge of the crib.

"Well, look at my strong boy moving all around like that." He whispered. Jake blinked his eyes a few times then lifted his head a little again. Tony resisted the urge to pick him up, knowing the movement Jake was doing on his own was good for his muscular development.

Praying he wouldn't cry, Tony left the room quietly. He stopped outside the door and winced, waiting for the sound he was sure would come.

It didn't. Smiling, he continued down the hallway and into the master bedroom.

Ziva was sound asleep. She was wrapped around his pillows and snoring softly. Tony's breath hitched for a moment. She looked beautiful. There was a slight flush to her cheeks and her hair was fanned all around her. He just wanted to crawl into bed and cuddle with her.

But, he didn't want to run the risk of waking her. So instead, he grabbed the baby monitor and went back to the nursery and got Jake instead. Carrying him to the living room, he laid him on his tummy in the bassinette. He knew that Jake hated tummy time. Tony and Ziva both believed it was because he couldn't quite see what was going on around him all the time.

Jake was quiet though, perhaps because of his new found talent of moving hid head from side to side. Tony smiled and went to his backpack, pulling out the object of his earlier errand.

Opening the small box, the diamond glittered in the sunlight flowing through the windows. He smiled to himself, proud at having chosen the most beautiful one in the store. It was perfect, and would be perfect for her.

Tony spotted a notebook on the table in front of the sofa. He picked it up and noticed that Ziva was keeping track of when Jake nursed. He would be due to eat in about ten minutes. 'Might as well get started'.

Opening the fridge, Tony found two bottles sitting and waiting for him. He grabbed one and placed it in the warmer. He also noticed that some of the pieces for Ziva's breast pump were laying in the dish drainer to dry.

"Looks like you and Mommy were busy today buddy." He said across the room.

Just as the warmer popped off, Jake started to grunt signaling that he'd had enough tummy time. Tony went to get him, then grabbed the bottle out of the warmer. He went to the sofa and sat down, giving the bottle a few moments to cool.

He reached into his pocket and pulled the small box out again. Opening it carefully with one hand, he held it up for Jake to see.

"See this? Daddy got this for your Mommy. What do you think? Will she like it?"

Jake grunted and pulled his arms and hands in tightly. Tony looked at him cautiously.

"I'll take that as a yes." Checking the bottle, he put the nipple near Jake's mouth. It took only a split second before he had moved his head just enough to latch on and began to drink.

"Ziva wasn't kidding. You are hungry. Again. Like always." He said with a smile.

Tony was able to get the baby fed, burped and changed before Jake was ready for a nap. Ziva continued her blissful sleep, and there was no way Tony was going to wake her. Instead, he went to the kitchen and pulled out the leftovers from the night before.

Rummaging through the freezer, he found some frozen garlic bread. Turning on the oven, he was just laying the slices of bread out on a baking pan when he heard some footsteps behind him.

"Have a nice nap?" He asked without turning around.

Her arms snaked around his waist as she hugged him from behind. "And you say that I have ninja senses?"

He smiled and turned, kissing her all the while being careful not to touch her with his buttery and garlicky hands.

"Hungry?" He asked.

"Famished. How did Jake eat?"

Tony smiled. "How do you think?" He grabbed another kiss. "Thank you for leaving bottles for me."

She returned the smile. "Jake enjoys his 'Daddy time' as much as you do."

She went to her favorite chair and flopped down. "How was work?

He shrugged as he popped the pan into the oven. "Boring. But I did find out some interesting information today."

Ziva had just finshed pulling her hair into a ponytail. " What's that?"

"Well, I am eligible for Family Medical Leave, six weeks worth. The papers are ready. I just have to let Delores know when I want to take it."

Her eyes lit up. "You're going to be off work for six weeks?" She asked with a smile.

He'd finished washing his hands before answering her, moving to squat in front of her. "No.. well yes. I'm going to be off. But, I'm going to be home… here… the entire time. "

The true meaning of his words were not lost on Ziva. She leaned forward and pulled him to her. "I love you so much." She whispered.

Tony kissed her quickly before standing and moving to the sofa. "You better. Because I intend to spend all day tomorrow looking at movers… that is… if you don't object."

Her eyes widened. "Movers?"

Their eyes then locked. "Yeah, movers. That is if you think-"

"You want to move in here… with us permanently?"

He merely nodded, gauging her reaction.

"Okay." She said.

"Okay?" He asked a bit incredulously.

She smiled and stood, moving to where he was sitting and climbing onto his lap, straddling him.

"Okay." She said again.

He touched her hair and allowed his hands to slide down her back. "You're sure?" Tony caught the teasing glint in her eye. "I mean, I don't want to put you out or anything-" His hands slid lower and caressed her backside gently , causing her eyes to close and a small smile to appear on her face.

"If you keep that up I will chain you to the bed and never let you leave." She threatened.

"You promise?" He caressed her again.

Not to be outdone, she slid closer and rubbed herself against his crotch. He hissed slightly causing her to do it again. Moving closer to his ear, she whispered; "I cannot wait to feel you inside of me."

Tony shifted his body slightly under her. Undeterred, she continued; "I cannot wait until I am screaming your name over and over, all the while running my nails down your naked back."

For emphasis, she ran her nails over his clothed back, Tony jumped slightly which caused her to rub against him again.

"Well hello, what have we here?" She asked, looking down between them.

He smiled. "You're starting to get my attention."

She smiled seductively. "Starting?"

Just then, the oven timer went off. They both groaned in frustration. Ziva, taking pity on the state she'd gotten Tony in, went to the kitchen to take the food out of the oven.

Tony stood gingerly. "I think I'm going to take a cold shower before I eat."

She smiled at him watching him walk carefully from the room. Smiling to herself, she moved Jake to his crib and grabbed the monitor from it's charger. She waited until she heard the shower water start before making her move.

She quickly stripped off her clothes and entered the bathroom. Dinner could wait.

To Be Continued

A/N So I'm taking a vote, do we want smut or more seriousness?


	56. Chapter 56

**Well, smut won by a landslide. Why am I not surprised? LOL Good news is, I had two chapters written yesterday.**

**The bad news is, after seeing the finale last night, I unfortunately feel that TIVA is dead. I was so excited after the elevator scene last week, and then they serve up that bullshit we got last night. Ziva apparently was too busy screwing Ray as a goodbye present to attend Mike Franks' funeral, ya know the man she was broken up about. The woman who has trust issues, doesn't want any more nomads in her life, and hadn't spoken to Ray for weeks was suddenly begging him for an engagement ring. They pissed me off with how Tony was acting with EJ, now they've ruined Ziva. It broke my heart, but I'm now in the camp that TIVA is dead. We're never going to get it. Five years' worth of episodes, watching and waiting for just the slightest TIVA moment was worthless. They've made me dislike the characters and this game they've played back and forth. I feel like I've wasted my time by investing so much in this couple. I almost wish Cote hadn't signed her contract.**

**With that being said, I don't know what's going to happen to this story. There's so much more that I want to tell, but my muse just can't get over what happened in the finale. My first reaction last night was to just delete the whole thing, but fans on the TIVA board talked my finger off the delete button. I sat today to see if I could write, and nothing but harshness and disdain came out, so I gave up. We'll see what happens in coming days.**

**Disclaimer applies, although I don't know why I bother. The characters I write certainly aren't from NCIS**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 56**

Tony had the water set at his preferred cool temperature and he carefully stripped his clothes off. His erection sprang free almost singing in joy at freedom.

He smiled to himself as he stepped into the water. He knew damn well he was going to need more than a cold shower to take care of this problem.

As the rivlets of water trailed down his toned body, he reached down and took himself into his hands. He'd barely managed one slow stroke when a sudden burst of cool air and light startled him, causing him to spin around.

Ziva was smiling as she stepped into the shower. "Mind if I join you?" She asked, raising her voice above the sound of the pounding water.

She almost laughed at the look on his face; a combination of being startled, being turned on, and lust… made all the better by her catching him stroking himself.

"I uh-" he stuttered, quickly releasing himself.

She moved farther into the shower and leaned back against the side, lifting one leg so she could rest her foot on the wall.

"I know what you were doing Tony." She reached out and wrapped her arms around his neck, drawing him closer to her so that his he was pressed against her belly. "Let me help you." She whispered to him.

He suddenly attacked her lips, their tongues dueling for control of the other. A small moan escaped from her as his body reacted and pressed his erection against her belly again.

Their lips broke apart and Tony leaned his forehead against Ziva's, trying to catch his breath before he answered her.

"You don't have to." He replied softly.

She smiled and brought her hands to cheeks. "I know."

He smiled and captured her lips again, every muscle in his body tensing and her soft hands traveled down his chest, abdomen and then cupping him gently. He quickly lost track of his thoughts as her hands began to softly stroke him.

He moaned loudly, dropping his head to his chest. His lips sought out her breast but stopped immediately when she flinched.

"No Tony. This is for you." She told him.

"But I like those." He argued causing her to chuckle.

"They are for your son, and are sore right now." She moved closer to his ear. "Just relax. " Her hands started their ministrations again. Tony, unsure of what else to do, placed his hands on the wall on either side of her head to support himself.

She watched him in fascination as his eyes closed. His lips parted slightly as she sped up her motions, his hips started to thrust in tune with her hand. She began whispering in his ear, begging him to think of being buried deep within her.

His breathing began heavy and erratic, coming more in short pants than actual breaths. He was reaching his breaking point quickly. Sensing he was close, she raked her nails gently down his length and whispered; "Let go Tony."

And with a shout of her name, that's exactly what he did. The sudden release left him breathless and unsteady on his feet. He began to fall causing Ziva to reach out and steady him. "Whoa, easy." She soothed as he came down from his high.

Once his senses started to return, a smile spread across his face. "You are amazing." He whispered to her.

She smiled. "I just lent a hand. " she said with a shrug.

He laughed and pulled her to him, enveloping her into his arms. "God I love you." He said into her wet hair.

She chuckled. "You better. You are stuck with me now."

"There's no place I would rather be."

She cuddled with him for several moments before she shuddered. "I wish I could say the same, but I am freezing!"

He laughed and reached over to turn the water closer to the warm side. They exchanged kisses and caresses as they washed one another and shut the water off.

Ziva toweled herself off quickly before wrapping in a large fluffy towel. Tony snuck up behind her, scooping her in her arms causing her to laugh.

"Tony! Put me down!" She demanded.

He shook his head and carried her to the bedroom, not bothering to cover himself. He laid her down on the bed, then sat next to her, staring down into her eyes.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I uh… I want to watch you."

"Watch me?" Then she caught his meaning. "Oh."

He placed a hand on her leg. "It's okay if you don't want to." He reassured her.

She thought for a moment. "I just… I do not know Tony. I have-" she gestured with her hand "-with your help. But I have not done it alone since before I had the baby…"

Tony watched her carefully. He then smiled. "It's okay. As long as that is all that it is."

She laid a hand over her head as her brows furrowed. "What else would it be?"

He shrugged. "You just… you've made some comments about your weight since you were pregnant. I just hope you're not worried that I won't find you sexy."

Her eyes dropped. 'Bingo.' He thought.

"I just… I have scars Tony." She stated.

He nodded. "I know. So do I, remember?" He teased, pointing below his chin. She smiled.

"Now, not only do I have the ones from Somalia, I have a scar… there… from the episiotomy."

"I don't care Ziva. You know I'm not that superficial." She shot him an incredulous look. "Okay, I used to be like that, but not anymore. I wouldn't care if you and I were in a room full of naked Playboy models. I'd still only have eyes for you."

She didn't answer. He sighed. "Wait here, I have something for you."

He hopped from the bed and disappeared down the hallways. Feeling self-conscious, she ran her hand over her towel-clad stomach and breasts.

He returned a few moments later with a small bag. Grabbing a clean pair of boxers, he slipped into them before sitting back down next to her on the bed.

"You wanted me to start being honest with you. It's hard for me to show my emotions. I know that. So here goes. I've told you, promised you, and sworn to you that we're in this together for life, that I'm not going anywhere. Sometimes, I feel like you believe me… other times I'm not sure."

She started to speak but he held up a finger, silencing her. "Why Ziva? Why do you think I'm going to leave you?"

Her eyes became glassy as she stared him in the eyes. "Everyone I have ever loved has left me, or betrayed me." She said softly.

He nodded. "I know. But Ziva, I need you to believe me when I tell you. I'm not going anywhere. I've loved you for so long that I don't know how NOT to love you. And now, we have this…" He gestured around the room. "-we have this chance. And I'm not going to blow it. I'm not going to suddenly change my mind. Or think that some girl across the room is more beautiful so the hell with you and Jake." He plastic the bag on the bed and took her hands. "This is it. You are my soul mate. You're my forever. "

She stared at him speechless, her eyes glistening with tears.

"Do you believe me?" He asked.

She didn't hesitate. "Yes."

He smiled and released the grip he had on her hands. He began fumbling with the bag. "I've only done this one time in my life… and it didn't work out too well. I never wanted to feel pain like that again… I never thought I would be able to open myself up to love like that again." He paused.

"Until I met you."

He reached into the bag and pulled out a small green box. Her eyes widened when she realized what he was doing.

"I love you so much that sometimes it hurts. I want to be with you every second of every day. I miss you the minute you walk out of a room. You're the other half of me… you make me whole… your part of the man I have become. "

He opened the box.

"Ziva David, will you marry me?"

To be continued


	57. Chapter 57

**Thanks everyone for your words of encouragement. Trust me when I tell you, I don't want to abandon this story. I don't want to abandon Tiva. But the WTFness of the writing of Ziva in Pyramid made me hate her character. I hate clueless, clingy women. "Tell them your wife will divorce you." WTF? Really? Hello you stupid shit, you DIDN'T TALK TO HIM FOR WEEKS! Who the hell is that woman with the gorgeous long hair and accent? Cuz it certainly wasn't Ziva David played by Cote de Pablo. And big ears didn't even need the hair gel this time to see his slimyness. But that's okay. The "new" Ziva apparantely enjoys it. She and Ray were too busy for her to go to Mike's funeral. I hope she didn't get hurt when Ray left NCIS and had to drag her behind him clinging to his leg like a 2-year old to their Mommy.**

**If this is how the writers want Ziva to be, I hope Ray rips her heart out and stomps on it. And don't turn to Tony to lean on. Apparantely her emotions are just a front. Ziva is the most important thing in Ziva's life. You cried on Tony's shoulder when Mike died, but Ziva had to spend time with Ray, so Ziva couldn't be bothered going to pay final respects to Mike. The next time she tries to lean on Tony he should Gibbs smack her and walk away.**

**Bitter much? Hell yeah I'm bitter Are y'all sure you want me to keep writing? Who knows where my muse might take me. Perhaps Ziva will go off and have an affair with the pizza guy… j/k**

**::sigh:: This is the last chapter I had written before the finale.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 57**

Ziva sat up quickly from the bed almost knocking Tony to the floor. She stared dumbfounded at the shiny diamond ring he was offering her.

"Tony-" She began.

In his nervousness, he interrupted her. "Look, I know this is really soon, and although it's an engagement ring, it's really not. Well, it is it's just…this is my promise to you. I'm here for as long as you'll have me. I know that we're not ready to start picking dates or picking out china patterns. But I want you to know that like this diamond, you and I are forever. And I want the world to know it too. I want to walk around and be the object of jealous men when they gawk at you and see MY ring on your finger. I want everyone to know that you're mine, that you've always been mine, and you always will be m-"

She stopped his babbling by putting two fingers on his lips. "Okay- okay Tony…" Two tears slid down her cheeks as she began to smile.

"Yes?" He asked hopefully.

"Oh yes." She replied, causing him to yell and scoop her into his arms.

"I love you so much." She whispered, showering him with kisses. Their lips met, and for a while, the outside world melted away. Finally, they broke apart and Tony brought the box forward.

"I went into the store on a whim. And as I was looking around, this one caught my attention." He pulled the ring from the box. "I thought it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. It was practically screaming your name to me. And when the salesman came over, he told me-"

He slipped the ring onto her finger. "It's an Israeli diamond. " He looked her in the eyes. "Imagine that, huh?"

She smiled and stared down at her hand before turning her attention to him. "It was fate." She whispered.

He touched the side of her face gently. "It always was fate."

She smiled and kissed him again. She suddenly leaned back and pushed herself up against the headboard.

Tony watched her curiously. She smiled at him. "Come here." She ordered

Every muscle in his body began to stiffen. He stared at her for a moment, wondering what was on her mind.

She smiled at him again, this time dripping in seduction. She began moving her hands over her body and up to her breasts, rubbing them gently before undoing her towel and allowing it to fall open.

He quickly crawled up to join her then. She wrapped her arms around him and brought her lips to his, kissing him like the world was going to end.

"I feel so frustrated." She admitted.

He began stroking her bare stomach. "Why?"

"I want to make love to you so bad. I want us to come apart together. But I just know my body is not ready for that."

He smiled reassuringly at her. "It's okay. Our time will come soon enough. And in the meantime, we can play."

"Play?" She said then jumped when Tony's hand brushed gently across her mound.

He nodded with a smile on his face. Reaching over to the bedside stand, he retrieved the bottle of personal lubricant.

"Play." He repeated. Then teasingly; "With the deposit I had to put down on that ring, I need a little play time."

She smiled and spread her arms up and over her head. "Then I am all yours."

He left the bottle within easy reach on the bed and leaned over, gently using his tongue to trace the nipple of her right breast. She flinched causing him to pull back.

"Did that hurt? You said they were sore earlier." He asked concerned.

She shook her head. "No, you did that and-" She stopped and sighed. "Now they are leaking again."

He laughed gently. "Well that's what they're supposed to be doing, right? Jake is a hearty eater. They're working overtime." He teased.

"How romantic. I feel like a smorgasbord." She laughed.

Tony leaned over her until they were almost face to face. "I think it's the sexiest thing I've ever seen." He licked around her nipple again, then moved to the other.

"Really?" She asked, sounding uncertain.

He lifted his eyes to her again. "Absolutely." He felt her relax a bit beneath him. Then teasing her again; "Besides, look how big they are now."

She swatted his arm. "I like my small breasts. I can wear low cut shirts and not have to worry about falling out of them."

Tony smiled. "Good point." He continued his ministrations, lavishing attention from one breast to the other.

She sighed softly and relaxed deeper into the pillows. Tony felt her breathing change and smiled to himself. Without stopping, he began running his hand up her leg, then across her thigh. Her muscles jumped slightly, anticipating his movements.

Sure enough, his hand eventually found her mound and began rubbing her again gently. She shifted involuntarily pressing herself into his hand.

He moved back and grabbed the bottle laying on the bed, squirting some of the liquid into his fingers. Placing the bottle on the bedside stand, he turned his attention back to her and captured her lips with his.

His stroking changed from his whole hand to his fingers. She parted her legs slightly, allowing him better access. While his lips returned to her breasts, his fingers dipped into her folds.

"Do you like my touch?" He asked her quietly and he placed a feather light touch stroke on her already engorged clit.

She moaned. "Yesss-" She hissed.

He used two fingers and began stroking small circles against her causing her to whimper. "Are you sure? Because I can stop."

His fingers were suddenly gone causing her eyes to shoot open. "Tony, I swear to whatever God that will listen that I WILL SHOOT YOU!"

He burst into laughter. "Okay, okay. " His fingers were back again, stroking small consistent circles around her nerve bundle.

She bent her legs up and opened them wide, allowing him total and complete access to her core. His lips traced her breasts again and trailed down her abdomen while his fingers continued their constant motion.

She began to writhe slowly on the bed. He picked up the pace on her clit after stealing a peak at her face, finding her eyes shut tightly and her cheeks flushed.

Her muscle began to clench as her pelvis thrust involuntarily into his fingers, allowing him to bear down and bring her closer to the edge.

His own arousal began to spiral out of control as she began making a mewling sound, losing control as he continued. The small sounds escaping from her throat turned into full out moans with every breath she exhaled. Her head was thrashing from side to side causing Tony to slide up her body, careful not to lose the pace his fingers had found.

Though her eyes were still closed, she sensed his closeness and stilled her head forcing her eyes to open. "Let go baby." He implored her softly.

And she did, calling his name into his ear and exploded around him. He smiled, removing his fingers and stroking her stomach gently while she settled. Her eyes suddenly popped open with a ferocious look. Before Tony knew what had happened she had flipped him over onto his back and was straddling his thighs, her hands gently sliding his soaked boxers down and taking his erection into her hands and stroking him with her magic fingers.

She leaned forward and caught his lips with hers, then trailed kisses down his chest and abdomen. Her mouth was suddenly on his erection causing him to jump. She closed her eyes, forcing the images away that suddenly began to invade her mind right at this moment.

'No no no dammit.' She swore to herself. She kissed his engorged member again, running her tongue along his shaft.

**_"Pleasure me"_**

**_"No"_**

**_-The feel of Saleem's fist connecting with her jaw, the coppery taste of blood filling her mouth._**

**_"Pleasure me"_**

**_-Her defiance as she spit a mouthful of blood at him. _**

**_-The feel as four men grabbed her roughly, groping and hitting her, forcing her mouth open as Saleem forced himself into her mouth. _**

**_-The men holding her tightly by the jaw as her thrust hard in and out of her mouth, causing her to choke and gag. _**

**_-More humiliation as they continued to hold her and Saleem ejaculated on her face, then kicked her in the stomach causing her to drop. _**

**_-Saleem was fixing his clothes as he said something to his men that Ziva couldn't hear as her ears were ringing. The sudden feel of their hands on her again, pushing her onto her back and pulling her pants down, shoving themselves inside of her while laughing and shouting into her face._**

**_-She didn't fight. Couldn't fight. It would only make it worse. Laying still as the men took turns being so forceful and rough that she began to bleed._**

Ziva hadn't realized it, but she'd frozen. Tony sat up worried. "Ziva?"

She didn't respond. She stared at him almost as if she didn't recognize him.

"Ziva?" He reached out to touch her arms causing her to flinch and scramble away from him. "Do not touch me!" She yelled, pulling her body tight as if protecting herself.

Tony realized what was probably happening. "Ziva baby. It's me. Come on baby. Look at me-" He soothed.

She slowly raised her head until her eyes locked onto his. "Tony?" She asked quietly.

He smiled gently. "Yeah. It's me."

"Oh God… oh God I am so sorry." She began to cry.

He reached out tentatively and touched her shoulder, relieved when she didn't pull away. "No, there's nothing to be sorry about. "

He held his arms out, allowing her to make the decision to accept his comfort or not. She didn't hesitate, quickly coming across the bed and burying herself into the warmth of his embrace.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked her softly.

"No."

Tony was quiet for a while, not sure how he should feel about her response.

"Do you want to call Amie?"

"I will later. I just want you to hold me now."

He smiled sadly. "My pleasure."

To Be Continued


	58. Chapter 58

**Well… let's see what happens here. I just put my Season 3 DVDs on, these should make me feel much better.**

**Don't get me wrong in my ranting about the end of the season. I'm not happy with Tony either. But when it came down to it, he was the Tony we all know and loved. And I don't even mind Ziva and Ray reconciling… if she hadn't just said earlier in the episode that she hasn't spoke to him since they broke up. And to have her not at Frank's funeral was inexcusable… just like Gibbs not being at her swearing in ceremony.**

**Ugh, ya know what. I'm done with the finale. We'll see what kind of patchwork they do in September, because it wasn't just the 'shippers that hated the episode.**

**Some of you are asking questions. Unfortunately, isn't allowing me to reply to reviews that are left, so I try to do it in author's notes.**

**At this time, Jake is around three weeks old, give or take a day or two.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Part 58**

Gibbs left the office and stopped to grab lunch at his favorite Mom and Pop hamburger joint. He mulled over the revelations of the last couple of days.

Rivka David had definitely piqued his interest. He saw so much of Ziva in her, yet she bore an air of sadness that shined through, even when she smiled.

He knew that feeling, the sadness that you can never shake. He'd felt that way since Shannon and Kelly died.

He looked at his team like his surrogate children. He knew that wasn't proper, but he couldn't help it. They were all so different and came from such diverse backgrounds. But, somehow they'd all come together under his tutelage and formed this rag tag family who adored one another. They all looked at him like a Father, especially Tony and Ziva who came from the worst backgrounds he could imagine.

When Ziva had first confided in him that she was trying to get pregnant, he admitted that he had reservations on a personal level. Everyone on his team, him included, thought Joshua was a boyfriend who seemed to be making her happier then he'd ever seen her. Even when she explained to him that wasn't the case, he thought that in the long run, it would be.

Having a child together had a way of changing people. And he thought the day would come eventually when their relationship would take a romantic turn.

And then there was DiNozzo. Gibbs knew there would be an issue there. Despite their unwillingness to move into any type of romantic entanglement, Gibbs saw what was between them, what they'd tried to avoid for so many years.

He knew that Ziva and Josh having a baby would send Tony into a downward spiral. Tony had a habit of locking up his emotions and drowning himself in alcohol and women to forget. Gibbs' had hoped that Tony would come to him as he had in the past. This time however he didn't. And after the visit from Palmer, Gibbs figured out why.

He was damn proud of how Tony had not only straightened himself out, but stepped up to the plate, not only about his feelings for Ziva, but as a father to Jacob. Gibbs' had watched he and Ziva closely the night they'd had dinner at Ziva's apartment. They seemed as if they'd been together for years. Neither acting as a first time parent with Jake, instead like he was their fourth or fifth child. They were there for each other, supporting and loving, sometimes expressing it in something as simple as a glance. After that night, Gibbs knew one thing.

They were going to make it.

But he still couldn't help but wonder about Joshua. Gibbs was never a man to believe in coincidences, and having Joshua reveal his cancer was out of remission right after the baby was born felt like it was something he chose to keep quiet, instead of just poor timing.

And now the revelation that not only was Ziva's mother his business partner, but that she'd moved to Washington when he had over a year ago had left a bad taste in Gibbs' mouth. His protective instincts were suddenly on high alert when it came to Joshua Aaronson. It was time that he got some answers.

After driving around for a while, he found himself pulling into the parking lot of the hospital. He'd ventured upstairs, entering Joshua's room, not entirely surprised when he found Rivka there.

"Agent Gibbs. We meet again." She greeted.

He nodded in her direction, turning towards the man in bed. He paused momentarily. Joshua's skin was a gray color, his face which had always been vibrant and full of life seem haggard. The light was diminished in his eyes causing Gibbs to believe that his time was near.

"How are you feeling Josh?" He asked quietly.

Josh chuckled softly. "Like I'm dying Agent Gibbs. " His eyes suddenly shot around the room. "Is something wrong with Ziva or the baby? Is that why you're here?"

Gibbs shook his head easing the younger man's tension. "No, they're both fine. I came here to talk to you."

Rivka shot an odd look at Gibbs before turning back to Josh. "You're upset that he didn't tell Ziva I was here in town."

Gibbs shrugged. "Yeah. Ziva trusts you Josh. Why would you keep something like that from her?"

Before he could answer, Rivka intervened. "I asked him to keep it quiet."

Gibbs threw a quick look in her direction. "That doesn't mean he had to."

Josh stared at Gibbs for a long while before he answered. "I didn't want Ziva to go through any more pain."

"And how do you think she feels knowing you kept this quiet for so long?"

Josh sighed. "I haven't spoken to her. She didn't call today."

Rivka suddenly looked concerned. "What did Eden tell you?" She asked him.

He shrugged weakly. "I haven't heard from her today either. But I can tell you know, Eden is pissed beyond belief."

Gibbs nodded. "As she should be." He turned to Rivka. "I don't know what went on between you and Ziva. But I know your daughter. Under her touch exterior is a warm, caring young woman who just wants to be loved. She wants to be surrounded by friends and family, people she can trust." He turned back to Joshua. "And I can't help but wonder what other secrets you've been keeping from her."

Josh closed his eyes for several moments before reopening them. "What else could there be?" He asked Gibbs.

Gibbs felt his anger flare. "Oh, I don't know. How long have you known your cancer was back? "

Bingo. The look on Josh's face said it all. Gibbs glanced over and Rivka who had noticed as well. She stood slowly from her chair.

"Oh Joshua. Tell me you didn't. "She said, stepping closer to the bed.

He didn't answer, choosing instead to close his eyes and turn away from her.

She was undeterred. "You knew that you were getting sick again, and never told Ziva? You went through with a plan to have her get pregnant with a baby you swore you would help raise, all the while knowing you would be leaving her as a single parent?"

"She always wanted a child, I made that possible for her." He began to explain.

"You should have told her the truth! Dammit Josh!" Rivka was becoming incensed causing Josh to sink back into his bed. Even Gibbs took a few steps back.

"Do you know what it's like being a single parent? I do and it's not easy. You should have given her the option to choose. She's a grown woman, she can make her own decisions."

"I just… wanted to see her happy before I died. I did what I thought was best for Ziva." He said quietly. Gibbs watched the anger immediately flush from Rivka's system.

"You still should have given her that option. Thank God she had Tony now." Rivka said softly, suddenly becoming glassy eyed. "If you'll excuse me gentlemen."

Rivka nodded towards Gibbs before quickly retreating from the room. Gibbs threw one final look in Josh's direction before chasing her out of the room.

"Hey!" He called. She stopped suddenly and turned. "Are you okay?" He asked her.

She smiled although a lone tear escaped down her face. "I'm fine. I just… everyone who wants to do what's best for Ziva seems to do nothing but hurt her. " She nodded towards Josh's room. "What he just said in there, about doing what he thought was best for Ziva… Eli spoke those same words to me on more than one occasion."

"I don't know if I'd put Josh and Eli in the same category." Gibbs replied.

She shook her head. "I may not have spoken to my daughter for a long time. But I know her. She'll see betrayal as a betrayal. There aren't different levels to it. It is what it is in Ziva's eyes." She pushed her dark hair back in exasperation.

Gibbs took her by the arm. "Come on." He said leading her away.

She looked at him confused. "Where are we going?"

"To dinner, before you do something stupid like knocking on Ziva's door."

She didn't argue.

To be continued


	59. Chapter 59

**Okay, now that Aldea's muse apparently worked out some sort of…kink…she had after watching "Kill Ari" last night, I think I can get back to THIS story now that the other one is posted. LOL**

**Over 700 reviews. Wow. I am speechless, really I am. I'm so happy that people are sticking with this opus and I hope I can continue to deliver.**

**Disclaimer still stands**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 59**

Tony took a few extra moments in the bathroom than he needed to. Ziva had shut down after the little incident, which had caused Tony's mind to conjure up dozens of different experiences she might have been remembering.

Once she'd settled down, he'd excused himself to go to the bathroom. He just needed a few moments to get his mind back in order before being with her again. He opened the door and turned off the light, smiling when he saw that she hadn't dressed. She was still laying like a naked goddess on the bed.

He laid down next to her, causing her to turn immediately and snuggle against his chest. He stroked her hair with one hand and played with her ring with the other.

"You okay?" He whispered after several minutes of silence.

"Yes. I will be. "She replied.

"Did you call Amie?"

She nodded. "I left a message. When she's with patients her cellphone goes directly to voicemail."

"Okay." He replied.

He felt her body tense. "Okay? Tony how can you say 'okay' after that?"

Before he could answer, a knock on the door interrupted. Sighing, he stood and grabbed his boxers, quickly putting them on along with a tee shirt and sweatpants. Turning to Ziva who has also gotten out of bed, he touched her cheek.

"We'll finish this later. I love you."

She turned her eyes from him, but he wouldn't allow it. He gently took her face in his hands and turned her gaze back to him. "**I LOVE YOU**." He emphasized, kissing her quickly on the lips.

She nodded and returned the kiss quickly before turning back to putting on a nursing tank. Tony glanced quickly into the nursery as he passed and saw that Jake was waving his arms in the air. Opening the door, he was surprised to find Amie standing there.

"Amie, hey." He said.

She smiled. "Hi. I got Ziva's message. I was already on the road from the hospital so I figured I'd stop by."

He stepped back and allowed her to enter. "Is everything okay? Ziva sounded upset."

Before he could speak Ziva came into the room. Seeing who their visitor was she immediately crossed the room and enveloped Amie into her arms.

Tony felt like an outsider, which he hated. He hated the jealous streak that shot through him as he saw Ziva crying on Amie's shoulder. He hated Saleem even more for doing this to her.

"Uh, I'm going to-"Amie looked at him as he pointed towards the hallway. Amie nodded to him as she stroked Ziva's back.

Once she felt Ziva begin to calm, Amie loosened her hold on her and pulled away. "What happened?"

Ziva sighed and looked away. Amie took her by the hand and led her to the table, sitting opposite of the younger woman and taking her hands.

"I uh… I had another flashback." Ziva admitted.

"What was it about?"

Ziva wasn't making eye contact with Amie which was making her nervous. "Ziva?" Nothing. "Ziva, look at me."

Ziva raised her eyes. Seeing the understanding and compassion waiting for her, she quietly told Amie about what she remembered.

Amie rubbed Ziva's hands as she finished her tale. Amie then nodded. "What made you remember that particular incident?"

Ziva's face suddenly blushed crimson, causing Amie to smile in an attempt to ease the situation. "Ziva?" She said in a light tone.

"Tony and I were… I was giving him…" She blushed darker.

Amie tilted her head. "Oral sex? Ziva why are you blushing? You should be proud of yourself. Most women don't want a naked man near her for months after having a baby."

Ziva shrugged. "I do not feel proud right now."

"Did the sex have anything to do with this?" Amie asked, pointing out Ziva's engagement ring.

That brought a smile to her face. "Partly."

"Congratulations sweetie. I'm so proud of you!" She hugged her across the table. "Now, how did you react when you had this flashback?"

"I froze. Then pulled away from Tony."

"And then?"

Ziva thought for a moment. "I let him hold me."

Amie smiled and squeezed her hand. "So after you experienced this god awful memory, you let this naked man comfort you?"

Ziva blushed again. "We were both naked. We had just gotten out of the shower."

One of Amie's brows rose. "Okay, now you stirred the doctor in me. Ziva-" She began to warn.

Ziva shook her head. "No, no. I know… we know. It was just some innocent playing-"

"Okay. Did you talk to Tony about what you remembered?"

"I- I could not."

Amie sat back in her chair but didn't release Ziva's hands. Glancing down the hallway, she called out; "Tony, can you come in here?"

Tony appeared a moment later with Jake snuggled against his chest. Amie smiled and released Ziva's hands, reaching out instead for the baby.

"Come here beautiful boy." Amie said, pulling Jake into her embrace. "Jacob, you're growing like crazy!" She said laughing. Jake pulled his arms in tight as his eyes drifted closed.

She nodded to the empty chair next to Ziva, signaling for Tony to sit down. Ziva's gaze was fixed on the baby.

Amie was back to business. "Now Ziva. Why did you feel like you couldn't share what happened with Tony?"

She didn't answer. She chose instead to stare at the table. Tony reached out and touched her arm. "Did I do something wrong?"

That got her attention. The tears that had been threatening to fall came forth in a burst. "No, God no. Please do not think that. It.."She began choking on her words. "It.. it was my fault. I did not fight them.. I let them-"

Tony glanced at Amie who was quietly talking to the baby. She implored Tony with her eyes.

"What Ziva? What do you think is your fault?" He asked.

Ziva tearfully confided her story to Tony. Amie watched him carefully, gauging his reaction in case she needed to intercede.

To his credit, he listened silently. When Ziva had finished, he pulled her to his chest tightly, allowing his own tears to fall. "I'm glad you didn't fight them baby." He whispered.

She pulled back. "What?"

He touched her face gently, wiping her tears away with the tip of his thumbs. "They would have just hurt you even more. The more you fought with them the worse it would have been." He poked her shoulder gently. "But YOU won. YOU beat them."

She thought for a period of time before reaching up and wiping her face. "They left me alone for several days after that."

Tony smiled proudly. "You're damn right they did. Saleem had to regroup, think of other ways to break you. Because that didn't work. "

"How do you do that?" She asked.

He looked at strangely. "Do what?"

"No matter what bad thing happens to me, you always make it better."

He smiled and kissed her forehead. "It's a hidden talent I have. Somehow I just have this sixth sense when it comes to you. " He took her face in his hands again, this time holding her cheeks so he could rub his thumbs across them. "We make each other better. That's why we work."

She smiled and kissed him softly before wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in her shoulder.

Tony, remembering that Amie was sitting across from them, glanced at her. She threw a proud smile in his direction and mouthed the words; "Well done." He smiled in appreciation.

Small grunting sounds drew everyone's attention. Amie laughed softly. "Well, as wonderful as this has been to see, a certain somebody is looking for food, and I'm afraid he won't be getting any from me."

Ziva laughed and separated herself from Tony. She took Jake and began pulling her shirt up.

"Do you want a blanket?" Tony asked.

Ziva shook her head. "No need."

Amie laughed. "Tony, I have seen more of Ziva than you have."

Ziva smiled and concentrated on the baby. Jake had latched onto her breast in no time.

Amie smiled. "How are you making out with breast feeding Ziva?" She was in Doctor mode again.

"Good, I think. I certainly don't have a shortage of breast milk. I am able to feed him on schedule, plus pump enough to freeze and let Tony feed him."

Amie nodded. "Good. Soreness? Dryness?"

Tony suddenly seemed a bit uncomfortable. "My breasts are sore from time to time. I use the balm that you suggested. Tony helps with it." Her playfulness was back as was evident when she winked at Amie. "I'm not sore at all.. there." She said, sparing Tony. "Dry yes. But that is normal, no?"

Amie nodded. "Absolutely. That will last for a while. Even when you're given the green light to have full intercourse, you may have that problem."

She had Tony's attention now. Amie had to do what she could not to laugh. "The tissue is severely damaged during labor and delivery. It takes a long time to repair itself. So, just keep some lubricant handy in case it's an issue."

Tony's mind had traveled to the fantasy of making love to Ziva and was only half paying attention. "Oh, we have a big bottle-" And then he stopped himself, embarrassed by the outburst. Ziva looked mortified.

Amie laughed. "Well, from the impression I'm getting, you might want to buy stock in the company." She laughed joyously at the embarrassment the younger couple was sharing.

To be continued


	60. Chapter 60

**Hmmm… nothing witty to say. Uh….. LONG LIVE TIVA!**

**Wow, 60 chapters and still going. It's like the story that never ends...**

**Disclaimer Still Applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 60**

Gibbs glanced in the rear view mirror of his pickup truck as he pulled into his driveway. Sure enough, within seconds, a Corolla followed him into the driveway.

He'd told Rivka to follow him to his house so he could change before dinner. She'd obliged, although he wasn't sure if it was willingly or not.

Rivka exited her car and glanced at Gibbs who was staring at her. "Now I see where Ziva got her driving skills." He commented.

Her hands went immediately to her hips. "This coming from a man who was driving 60 in a 35 zone?" She argued.

"You ran two red lights, and pushed a taxi up on a curb!" He said, spreading his hands out.

"You were driving fast; I did not know the way. Besides, I'm sure that taxi driver has done the same thing numerous times. He'll get past it and think again before he tries it."

Gibbs grinned and gestured towards the front door. Rivka glanced around his property in a non chalant manner, however he could tell by how quick her eyes scanned that there was more to it than that.

He put his hand on the front door but before opening it, stopped and turned to her. "Do you always do that?"

"Do what?"

He nodded towards the yard. "Scan for enemies."

She sighed but smiled slightly. "Was I? I guess old habits die hard. I was married to Eli for ten years. He drilled into my head that danger lurked around every corner."

Gibbs opened the door and went in, wincing inwardly at her next words. "Sometimes in my own home."

He closed the door and tossed his keys on the table. "Was Eli abusive?" He blurted out.

She looked at him sadly. "Not physically no. Don't get me wrong, he grabbed me a few times, but that was in an attempt to calm my own temper. He never raised a hand to me, or the children. Mentally is another story. I don't believe he meant to be that way. Everything he did was for the good of Israel. Everything. He could not see past that."

"There must have been something in him that you loved." Gibbs pointed out softly.

She smiled. "Oh, he was handsome and charming, full of mystery and treated me like a queen at first. We'd only known each other for a few months when I found out I was pregnant with Ziva. And it was strange, because we were always so careful. I was eighteen and had just been offered a wonderful opportunity with The Israel Ballet. But, Eli promised me the world, talked of how wonderful our life would be. He was older, mysterious, and swept me off my feet. We were married four months after we met. Ziva was born seven months after that. My family disowned me."

Gibbs felt her sadness creep over him. He sat at the kitchen table and gestured for the empty chair. Rivka joined him, placing her hands flat on the table as he'd seen Ziva do on many occasions.

"Why didn't you get out sooner?" He asked.

"How could I? I was just a child myself. Ziva was such a beautiful, wonderful baby. No matter how horrible things were, one little smile from her lit up my life. I pushed my own fears aside and focused solely on her. That worked for a long time. It's easier to ignore a problem than fix it. And Eli was hardly ever home at all."

She noticed a bottle of bourbon sitting on the kitchen counter and stood to retrieve it. Gibbs was about to show her where the glasses were when she took the cap off and took a large drink right from the bottle. She handed it to him with a small smile that he returned. He took a drink as well, and then put the bottle on the table between them.

She continued her story. "I remember a time when Ziva was a baby. She wasn't even walking yet. She would pull herself up on the furniture and while holding on, walk around and around the living room." Her eyes closed as she relived the memory in her head. "She would fall and laugh, looking to see if I'd noticed. Then she'd get right back up and do it all over again. It was this little game she and I would play all the time." Her eyes opened again and she eyed the bourbon bottle. "One night, we were playing and Eli came home. He'd been gone for so long that Ziva was afraid of him. She cuddled to me until she got over the shy streak she developed around him. Eventually, I was able to put her on the floor and she started 'walking' again. Eli kept taking her hands off the furniture, trying to force her to walk on her own. She tried to fight it, one time smacking at his hands and grabbing the sofa for support. Eli turned and began yelling at me for coddling her. Ziva started crying at his tone of voice and wouldn't let him touch her. She would never play that game again."

Gibbs stood and retrieved two glasses from the cabinet. "Well, she eventually learned to walk." He said, pointing out the obvious.

Rivka smiled proudly. "Eli was home just for a few days, then left again. He said goodbye to the two of us. Ziva was playing with blocks on the living room floor. The moment he closed the door she looked at me and smiled this beautiful cheeky baby smile. She stood up and took two wobbly steps towards me, giggling the entire time. It was almost as if she intentionally defied Eli."

Gibbs smiled as he poured two glasses. "Why am I not surprised?"

Rivka grinned. "She's given you problem or two I see."

Gibbs chuckled. "Or two. She marched into NCIS Headquarters so strong, and brash. No one talks down to me, and no one defies me. The first night I knew her she got right in my face. I mean, she was THIS-"he put his hand up to demonstrate, "-close. Our director had to step in and break it up."

Rivka chuckled. "Yet you welcomed her onto your team." She sipped her drink.

Gibbs nodded. "It was an order from Director Shepard. But it was more than that." He sipped his drink. "How much do you know about Ari?"

The light in Rivka's eyes faded. "I first met Ari when he was ten years old. There was already darkness in his soul. And of course, his mere existence was another nail in the coffin of my marriage. Eli never even told me about him until after Ziva was born. Even with that darkness, he and I had a special relationship. He was more like Eli than I would ever tell him. Yet, he adored his sisters. No matter where he was in the world, if either of them had a school play, or a dance recital, he would be there. He told me things that Eli would never dare tell me. No one in the world knew about the first time I left Eli, except Ari. He actually was able to get the money from Eli and gave it to me. I don't know how he did it, but he did."

"First time?" Gibbs asked quietly.

She nodded. "Eli was out of the country. Ziva was two. I fled our home to Haifa. I couldn't find work. No one wanted to hire a twenty year old single mother with no support system. The money ran out in a couple of weeks. And then I found out I was pregnant with Tali. I used the last bit of money I had to buy our bus tickets back to Be'er Sheva. Eli never knew I had left. You're only the second person I've ever told. It took me a long time to work up the courage to do it again."

"What made you go the second time?"

"I come home and caught Eli sitting in the living room, showing our nine year old daughter how to shoot a gun. Tali was only six, and was sitting a few feet away watching the whole thing. I had to get them away from him before it was too late."

Gibbs nodded. "But he still got Ziva into Mossad."

She nodded. "It was a bitter custody dispute that I didn't stand a chance of winning. My attorney was questioning Ziva about the gun incident, and she told the judge that the gun was okay, but she likes knives better because they don't run out of bullets. There was audible gasps from the around the room. She was NINE YEARS OLD, sitting there with lacy white knee socks and ribbons in her hair. The judge allowed split custody. The children would spend weekends and one week out of the month with him. He was rising up the ranks of Mossad quickly, and was permanently stationed in Tel Aviv."

"Why didn't you stand a chance of winning?"

She took a long drink from her glass. "The Judge's wife had been raped and murdered by a Hamas sympathizer. It was two Mossad Officers who caught and executed him. Of course the Judge would be loyal to Mossad. I didn't find that information out until a year later. Ari came across it and told me. By that time, I'd already lost my little girl."

"Lost her, how?"

"She was already becoming secretive and argumentative. The more time she spent with Eli the worse it became. She gave up dancing and starting running, and hiking." She looked him in the eyes. "It was almost like she was training. She accelerated through high school, graduated a year early. That damn photographic memory of hers. She was seventeen and Eli sent her off to what he called an 'accelerated learning' program. The hell it was. It was something for Mossad. She came back completely different. With Tali, she was my happy, smiling little girl. And then her eyes would just get this look of ice in them. She started her mandatory service in the IDF. One time, she came home from training. She was trying to talk to me about this boy she liked. She wanted to talk to me about sex, but the minute she starting to broach the subject I flipped. I was so full of hatred for what Eli was doing to her. I thought for sure he was teaching her to use sex as a weapon. She dropped the subject quickly. The next day she had to report back for duty. The next time I saw her I tried to talk to her and to have 'the talk' she wanted to have. She just smirked at me and said 'too late.' That of course started another fight between us. I was trying, really I was. She got so angry that she screamed at me that she's "screwed some boy in the back of a weapons carrier and liked it'. I hauled off and slapped her. It was the first time I'd every laid a hand on my children like that."

A lone tear ran down Rivka's cheek. "She went to stay with Eli for the rest of the weekend. The next thing I knew, she was honorably discharged from IDF early. Her 'official' Mossad training started right away. Mossad arranged an apartment for her in Tel Aviv. I guess Eli thought his brainwashing of Ziva was done, so he tried focusing on Tali. I wasn't going to let that happen. I fought him on every angle. Ari and Ziva did too. Something occurred to me then."

Gibbs was silent but waited for her to continue.

"I may have lost my Ziva, but that was her intent. She willingly gave herself over to Eli and Mossad to protect Tali. She was doing for her sister what I couldn't do for her."

Gibbs reached out and touched her hands gently. She pulled one away and wiped the tears from her face. "Tali was still my little princess. At sixteen her life was about clothes and make up, music and boys. Ziva and Ari both spoiled her rotten. Ari even took her to Paris a few times just to shop. She was visiting Ziva in Tel Aviv when she was killed… a suicide bomber."

Gibbs' heart clenched. "She apparently was in some club or something. The damage was severe. It took several days of digging before they even found her body. Ziva was in a tail spin but then disappeared for days before Tali's funeral. The night before, Ari came to see me. That was when I saw just how dark he had become. He proudly told me how Ziva had tracked down the man who ordered the bombing. He smiled when he told me how right in the middle of screwing him, she'd slit his throat from end to end. "

Every muscle in his body clenched. Rivka looked him in the eyes again. "She was just child. Nineteen years old. I saw her the next day at Tali's funeral, standing next to Eli. He kept a hand on her back the entire time, like her was holding a puppet on a string. She tried to talk to me but I just had this sudden flash… of my baby girl, naked on top of this murderer with blood all over her hands. I flipped Gibbs. I started screaming at her, calling her horrible names."

Rivka had squeezed her eyes shut as she recalled the day. "I called her a monster. I think I even asked her why… why had God taken Tali and not her. I screamed at Eli that he could have her, that I was done. I fled the funeral and ran home. I grabbed my passport and credit cards, emptied my bank account and left Israel. I haven't seen or spoken to Ziva since."

Gibbs didn't say a word. Her poured more bourbon into her glass and tapped the table with his finger. She took it graciously.

"I ended up in London. And when the shock and pain started to dissipate I'd realized what I'd done. I tried calling her. Her cellphone and home phones were disconnected. I wrote letters to her home address that got returned, stating there was no such person at that address. I didn't know what else to do, so I sent them to Mossad Headquarters in care of her. They were never returned. But they were never answered either. I wrote letter after letter after letter. Nothing. I finally gave up. I got a job and started going to business school. I figured she was out of my life forever. Turns out, I have an aptitude for numbers and became very successful. But she was always in my thoughts. So then, several years ago, I ran into Joshua at a business conference in Munich. He filled me in on minimal aspects of her life. He and I became friends and I ended up investing in his business. All the years of him living the playboy life style had caught up to him and his business was struggling. I came in as a silent partner and we righted the ship. I asked him not to tell Ziva I was a part of his life. She's tried so hard to build a life for herself here in the United States; I didn't want to open old wounds."

"She definitely has a lot of those." He said quietly.

She nodded. "I know. The more Josh and I worked together the more he told me about her." She reached for her purse and pulled out her wallet. Opening it, she pulled out a photo of Ziva holding Jacob. It was minutes after Jacob had been born and Ziva's first time holding him. Ziva still looked exhausted, sweat still lined her brow. Jacob hadn't even been cleaned up yet. Gibbs smiled and reached into his back pocket, pulling out his wallet. He pulled out the same exact photo and held it up to Rivka. She laughed softly.

"Joshua gave me this. It's the first time I'd seen her in so long. I was amazed at how beautiful she is. She looks so, so happy. You helped give that to her."

Gibbs shrugged tucking the photo safely back in his wallet. "She found it for herself; I just helped guide her along the way."

Rivka stared longingly at the photo before she put it away. "I would give up everything I have just to be able to hear her voice again." She sighed. "But that's never going to happen. I'd rather she be happy than have me selfishly show up on her life again."

Gibbs sat back in his chair. "She knows you're in town. Tony and I talked earlier."

She smiled. "I'm not surprised. I knew the moment that Eden had caught me at the hospital the secret would be out. She'd never keep anything from Ziva."

Rivka looked around the room. "I'm sorry to dump all of this on you Agent Gibbs. "

Gibbs shrugged. "It filled in a lot of blanks for me. Besides, I'd rather you talk to me then fly off the handle and go beating down Ziva's door."

She looked as if she was about to protest when he stopped her with a look. "Ziva is a lot like you, whether you chose to believe it or not. When she gets angry, she has impulse issues."

Rivka burst into laughter. "Impulse issues. I like that." She became serious again. "I don't feel like dinner now. I'm sorry. I'll just leave you to have a peaceful night."

Gibbs reached out a hand to stop her. "You've had three drinks since you got here. You're not going anywhere until you've had some coffee."

She settled back into her chair and watched quietly as he set up the coffee pot. He put the sugar on the table then reached into the refrigerator to get the milk out, just in case she needed it. He stopped and smiled. "Well apparently, we won't need to go out to dinner after all."

She watched as he pulled a tray of lasagna from the refrigerator. "Ziva." He explained. Rivka's brows furrowed.

"I don't know why she does it. After she got back from Somalia and got settled, she started cooking up a storm. I guess it was a way to take her mind off of things. I would come home and find trays and trays of food, either in my refrigerator or freezer. She's been doing it ever since."

Rivka smiled. "Her way of taking care of you?"

He smiled back. "Maybe. She makes damn good lasagna." He placed the tray of food on the counter and grabbed the milk, placing it on the table. He poured them both a cup of coffee before dishing out some food and microwaving it.

Rivka stared at her dish for several moments, as if she was lost in thought. Gibbs watched from the kitchen before removing his plate from the microwave.

He sat back in his chair. Rivka looked up and smiled before tasting the food. She gasped.

"Too hot?" He asked.

She shook her head, her eyes becoming glassy. "No. This is my recipe."

To Be Continued


	61. Chapter 61

**Awwww, I didn't mean to make people cry! Okay, maybe I did. Hehehe Yes, I do have an evil streak. Sorry!**

**Alright, so I go back to work on Monday after having a week off. ::sigh:: So, we're going to have large gaps in chapters again. So, I'm trying to write as much as I can over the weekend to make up for it. Your reviews push me to write me. I definitely am more focused when I know people are waiting, so thank you all wholeheartedly.**

**Now… smut or serious… smut or serious… hmmm….**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 61**

After bidding Amie farewell with a multitude of thank yous, they warmed up the leftover lasagna to go with the now cold garlic bread still waiting for them.

Jake seemed content on sleeping. He did that everytime they had a guest. Tony joked it was because he worked overtime to look as cute and adorable as he could while company was there.

Tony sat down on the sofa as Ziva finished loading the dishwasher and starting it. He grabbed the remote control and flipped on the TV.

"So, what do you feel like doing tonight?" He asked, not bothering to look into the kitchen.

She suddenly appeared in his line of sight. He looked up and swallowed deeply at the sultry look he was getting. "You." She replied, grabbing the remote and flicking off the TV.

The remote ended out on the floor when he quickly reached out and snatched her, pulling her to straddle on his lap. They kissed and touched like two teenagers who were grabbing a moment while one's parents ran to the store.

They broke for air, allowing their foreheads to touch. "God I love you. It doesn't feel like enough to say it." He whispered to her.

She smiled. "Please, do not ever stop saying it. I love hearing those words come from your mouth."

He kissed her again softly. "Never going to happen."

She touched his face gently. "You look tired. Go lay down for an hour or so. I will wake you."

"Nah, I'm okay."

"Tony please. Do not wear yourself out. I will wake you, I promise. I am just going to use the breast pump, maybe read a little. You do not need to help."

He started contemplating the idea. She scooted off of his lap and stood, holding her hands out. "Here, I will even tuck you in."

He smiled and allowed her to lead him down the hall. Not letting go, she entered their room and sat on the edge of the bed facing him.

He bent down and kissed her, waiting for her to release his hand so he could climb under the covers. She let go alright, but her hands went straight for the waistband of his sweatpants and began pulling them down.

He jumped back snatching her hands. "Ziva, what are you doing?"

"What do you think I am doing?"

"Ziva, you don't have-"

She grabbed him roughly through his clothes. "Tony, if you do not stop telling me that-" She released her grip causing him to let out a sigh in relief. "I know I do not HAVE to. But I want to."

He lifted her chin with his finger. "Why?"

She thought for a moment. "To prove to my memories that I can."

He didn't argue. Instead he stepped closer to her, determined to stop her the second it appeared something was going wrong.

She pulled the waistband of his sweats and boxers just enough to free him. She smirked. "Tony, after all these years of talk, I thought you'd be ready to go at a moment's notice."

He smiled at her teasing remark. "I'm a little old for that now Zee-vah." He let out a breath as she used her hand to gently stroke him.

As soon as she felt him begin to harden she leaned forward and brought him to her mouth. God she felt so good, but he couldn't lose himself, not yet. He had to concentrate on her.

Before long, he'd forgotten what he was supposed to be concentrating on and why. There was just her, the cross between the warmth of her mouth and the gentleness of her touch gave him the most erotically based case of amnesia he'd ever felt.

Natural instinct took over and he began swaying into her. She took him further in, steadying him with her hands on his hips.

He felt like his knees were going to buckle but she wouldn't let up pulling away long enough to get his footing before she was on him again. Her name was escaping from his lips, over and over as her tongue swirled around his tip.

Every exhale brought a moan of pleasure from him. Somewhere far, far away he thought he heard her pleasure as well. Her mouth disappeared again as her hand worked him to a painful state of hardness.

Coaxing him to the bed, she encouraged him to lay down. He almost fell over his partially pulled down pants, but he didn't care. It was all about getting her mouth back.

And there it was, teasing and nipping, teeth dragging and licking. Somehow she knew every pleasure point on him and was hitting them all simultaneously. He couldn't take a breath without a moan or a hum. He was close and needed to warn her but couldn't form a coherent word.

She sensed it when he jumped in her mouth. She pulled away in just enough time before his body exploded in the hardest orgasm he'd ever experienced.

He laid still allowing his body to calm. After several moments, he realized Ziva had disappeared. Lifting his head, he saw her crawling back onto the bed with a satisfied smile on her face. She held up the towel she'd been wearing earlier.

"I think we need this." She said with a smile.

He smiled and nodded, but still couldn't speak. She cleaned him up then rearranged his clothes for him. Leaning down, she kissed him in the forehead. "Have a good sleep my love."

"Ziva?" He called, finally finding his voice before she exited the room.

She turned. "In an hour, come in and make sure I'm still breathing."

She chuckled. "Your heart better not give out on me yet Tony. We have a long way to go."

And with that promise, she disappeared down the hall towards the laundry room.

Oh yeah, she would be the death of him.

* * *

Gibbs and Rivka had just finished their second cup of coffee when his cellphone rang. Sighing, he reached into his pocket and extracted it, sighing again when he noted Director Vance's number.

"Yeah?" He barked into it. He listened for several moments but continued to watch Rivka, whose eyes were focused on the lasagna tray across the room.

'She's staring at it just because her daughter made it.' He realized. Turning his concentration back on his phone call, he nodded. "Alright, I'll let DiNozzo know."

He closed his cellphone and watched her for a moment. Realizing his conversation was done, she turned her attention back to Gibbs. He watched her sadly.

"I had a daughter, Kelly. She died when she was eight." He told her.

She nodded. "I know, Joshua told me."

Gibbs was quiet for a moment. "Sometimes I find some of her old toys, or school projects or a picture she drew, and I just stop and stare at it. It always makes me feel like she's there with me."

Rivka smiled. "I can understand that completely." She said, glancing again at the lasagna tray.

"Well, at least I get to call DiNozzo and give him some good news." He said, flipping open his phone and hitting the speed dial for Tony.

After two rings, the phone picked up.

"Ziva?" Gibbs asked, causing Rivka to immediately jump in her chair.

"Did you expect some other woman to answer Tony's phone?" Came the sarcastic response from the other end.

Gibbs stared at Rivka for a long while, gauging her reaction.

"Gibbs? Are you still there?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm still here." It was then that he made a decision. Pulling his cellphone away from his ear, he hit the button on the keypad and held the phone in front of him.

"Gibbs?" Ziva asked again, now on speakerphone. Tears immediately flooded Rivka's eyes as her hand shot to her mouth.

"I'm here Ziver. Where's DiNozzo?"

In her apartment, Ziva glanced oddly at the phone. "He's taking a nap. Jake had us up a lot last night."

Gibbs nodded. "Well, tell him not to bother coming into the office tomorrow. The terrorist cell that the LA Office was tracking is no more. The leader died in a car accident today and took his top two men with him. His organization is in disarray. Hetty's team is rounding up the suspects in LA as we speak. It's all over."

Ziva smiled. "Okay, I will let him know. Is everything okay Gibbs?"

He continued to stare at Rivka. "Yeah. I just finished eating dinner. Somehow a tray of lasagna ended up in my fridge. Any idea how that happened?"

Ziva was quiet for a moment. "Must be from someone who cares about you."

Gibbs grinned. "Night Ziver. Kiss Jake for me."

"I will. Good night Gibbs."

He waited until she'd disconnected the line before closing his phone and dropping it on the table. He reached his hands out to Rivka's, covering them.

"Why did you do that?" She asked tearfully.

"Because, I'd give anything in this world to hear my little girl's voice again."

Before he knew what was happening, she had collapsed into a crying heap. He pulled her close and rubbed her back, hoping that somewhere in her tears, she found some solace.

To Be Continued


	62. Chapter 62

**Back to work full time tomorrow. Everyone say it with me… NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**=)**

**Disclaimer Still Applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 62**

Smack

Tony cringed but refused to open his eyes.

Smack

Grunting, he moved away but still refused to open his eyes.

Smack, there it was again. Sighing, he forced his eyes open to see what the hell it was that woke him from his nap.

He was greeted by two miniature clones of Ziva's eyes. The original owner of those eyes was laying on the other side of Jake with a smirk on her face.

"What?" He asked crankily.

"You have been asleep for two hours." She announced.

"You were supposed to wake me in an hour. I have to get up and go to the office tomorrow."

"Not anymore. I had an interesting conversation with Gibbs."

"No office?"

"No office. Not for six weeks."

He smiled and focused down on the baby who was staring intently at his face. "Did you hear that buddy? Daddy doesn't have to go to work!"

Jake's mouth opened and he stuck his tongue out slightly causing Tony to shake his head. Looking at Ziva, he nodded.

"I think he's excited."

She smiled. "I can tell."

He snuggled back into the pillows and reached a hand out, laying it on her hip. "What was that hitting me?"

She smiled. "I tried to wake you gently, but you wouldn't budge. So, Jake had to get involved."

Tony eyed the baby suspiciously who was content staring at his Daddy's face, almost as if he was remembering his features.

"You wouldn't do that to Daddy, would you?" He asked.

Ziva reached her hand over and took Jake wrist in her fingers, moving it slightly and smacking Tony lightly on the cheek.

"Ow, aw man! Jake, I thought we had an understanding here! You're not supposed to be siding with the womenfolk!"

Ziva, caught up in Tony's playfulness laughed. "Typical DiNozzo genes." She muttered and then stopped, realizing what she had said.

Tony noticed her expression and sidled closer. "Hey, don't do that. You don't have to watch everything you say. We made our choices, the past is the past. I love this situation just like it is."

She seemed unsure as she stared into his eyes. Finding the understanding she always sought from him, she relaxed and smiled sadly.

"Why the long face?" He asked.

She shrugged. "I love this. You, me and the baby. It feels so perfect, I will miss it when he gets older."

Tony smiled. "Well, then we'll just have to start on number two to fill the void." The smile then dropped from his face.

"Now who is conscious about what he is saying?" she asked.

He sighed. "We can always adopt." He pointed out.

She turned and moved Jake onto his tummy. He tucked his legs under himself, almost sticking his butt straight in the air.

"We are two workaholic Federal Agents with long hours and a dangerous job. Add that to the fact that I do not have an exactly stellar history-"

The shrill sound of Ziva's cellphone interrupted him before he could respond. Tony laid his hand on Jake's back. "Go head, I've got him." He told her.

She slid from the bed and disappeared down the hall. He stared at Jake and wondered for the first time; 'Is this it? Is this our only chance?'

Ziva glanced at the clock, finding it strange that anyone was calling at this hour. She noted Eden's name on the caller id.

"Shalom." She answered.

"Ziva?" Came the emotional response from the other end.

"Yes, Eden what is wrong?"

"The hospital just called. Josh has spiked a fever. They're afraid he has an infection but he's refusing anymore tests. He's also refusing to eat and signed paperwork refusing a feeding tube. Dr. Boyd said we need to come down tonight to say g-"

The last word came in the form of a sob. Tears immediately ran down Ziva's cheeks as she sucked in a deep breath. "Go, you go. I'll be there as soon as I can."

Eden didn't reply, she simply disconnected the line.

She dropped the phone back onto the counter and stared around the room. All of the walls suddenly felt as if they were closing in on her. She used her hands to push her hair back, holding it out of her face until she could get her bearings.

She turned and rushed down the hallway, throwing the closet open and grabbing at clothes.

"Ziva?" Tony asked, concerned by the state she was in.

She froze as sobs began to wrack her body. Tony grabbed two pillows and placed them around Jake, just in case he decided to learn to roll at that moment.

"Josh-" She mumbled.

Tony took a deep breath. "Are we too late?" He asked, putting his hands on her arms to steady her.

"No, but I have to hurry." She began tearing clothes off the hangars again, unable to clearly see anything she was grabbing due to the tears blurring her eyes.

"Hey, hey. Ziva, listen!" Grabbing her arms again he spun her around. He glanced quickly at Jake who hadn't moved at all.

"We'll call someone to sit with Jake. You're not driving like this."

"Tony, we don't have time!" She protested.

His mind raced. They could call Abby, knowing that she would gladly come and sit with the baby. But she lived all the way across town. Suddenly, it dawned on him.

"I know who to call."

To Be Continued


	63. Chapter 63

**I've received some interesting questions in e-mail that I thought I would address here. Some folks are wondering about Jake, and if I'm going to show his developing a little quicker than what has been happening in this story.**

**The answer simply is 'No'. If I decide to skip the story ahead a few weeks or months, then we'll see Jake doing more than sleeping and eating. But my BIGGEST pet peeve is reading a good fanfic and then all of a sudden we have a six month old TIVA baby speaking full sentences, reading, writing, and driving cars, whatever. I have this story a/u enough, it certainly doesn't need a SuperBaby. One guaranteed way to have me stop reading a story is to have a four year old TivaBaby graduating medical school.**

**Disclaimer Still Applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 63**

Gibbs sat back on the sofa and smiled gently down at the baby snuggled on his chest. Tony and Ziva had left less than twenty minutes ago, and there really wasn't a reason for him to be holding Jake.

However, he'd been drawn to his nursery just minutes after the couple had left. Jake was sleeping soundly. However, a long forgotten instinct had kicked into gear when Gibbs stared down at the infant. Before realizing what he'd done, he scooped the baby up and was snuggling him to his body.

Jacob didn't mind. He pulled his arms and legs tight and snuggled into the warmth the adult was providing him. Yet, he'd picked up right away that this wasn't his Mommy or Daddy. His eyes had opened and Gibbs found himself being stared at by a set of deep brown eyes.

Rivka and Ziva's eyes.

He must have at least had a familiarity with Gibbs. After he'd spoken to him for a few moments, his eyes had drifted closed again. And now, here they sat on the couch together.

Gibbs put his feet up on the table in front of him and leaned back farther into the couch. He glanced down at the baby again and smiled. Jake's mouth was open, his tongue barely peeking out; a small drool spot was already forming on the older man's shirt. He reached forward and gently ran his hand over the Jake's feather soft smattering of hair, marveling at how quickly the baby was changing.

His skin tone had darkened slightly, leading Gibbs to believe that Jake would develop his Mother's olive toned skin. His hair, what he had of it, had been dark when he was born. It already had started to lighten, now more of a tea color than its original dark brown.

As he marveled down at the baby, Jake's breathing suddenly changed. He hiccupped slightly while stretching his arms and legs out. Within moments, he's tucked them back in and relaxed again, however his eyes were open and he was studying Gibbs.

"Your parents will be home soon little one." Gibbs soothed, rubbing small circles on his back. Gibbs had to smile when Jake stretched out again, almost as if he was motioning Gibbs to provide him with a bigger massage than what he was already getting.

"I think you're picking up some of Tony's habits." Gibbs told him in a soft voice.

Jake managed to pull his fist in and tuck it under his chin. He then blinked his long lashes at Gibbs, almost as if he was agreeing in his own way.

"If I catch you reading GSM Magazine anytime soon I'll smack you hard enough you'll still be feeling it at your prom." He threatened in a teasing tone.

Jake put his hand on Gibbs' chest, taking a bit of his shirt in his small fingers. Gibbs reached his hand up and stuck his finger out, tapping Jake's fist until the baby grabbed on tight.

"This is out secret Jake, but you're already my favorite out of all my future grandkids." He said softly to the baby, smiling at the prospect.

* * *

Tony held Ziva's hand tightly as they exited the elevator onto the oncology ward. Tony hated his floor. It smelled of medicine and held a sense of despair. And that sense was exactly what both he and Ziva were feeling.

As they passed the nurses' station, one of the nurses looked up to see who their late visitors were walking onto the floor. Tony held up their security pass, and she nodded slightly without saying a word, her eyes conveying not only understanding but sympathy.

He squeezed Ziva's hand gently before they entered the room. She hadn't spoken ten words since they left the apartment, and Tony was beginning to worry. However, his worries were somewhat alleviated when she squeezed his hand in return, tighter than he had hers.

He allowed her to enter first, walking close behind her. Eden was already there, sitting in a chair with red rimmed eyes.

"He just fell asleep." She told them as they came closer to the bed.

Ziva gasped. Joshua looked one hundred times worse than he had the last time she saw him. His skin held a grayish color and it seemed to be sagging from his bones. His hair, always dark and curly, now hung limply and showed discoloration.

Tony's breath hitched as he took in the man who had given so much to him and Ziva. If it wasn't for Joshua, he and Ziva wouldn't be parents. Jake was the catalyst for Tony getting off his ass and trying to straighten his life out. And with that, gave him and Ziva the chance they'd both always wanted.

Ziva sat in the chair on the side of the bed opposite Eden. Tony stood behind her, gently rubbing her shoulders in support.

She turned and looked up at him, a sad smile on her face. 'Thank you.' Her eyes told him. He bent and kissed her on the forehead. They didn't need words to understand each other any longer.

A breath rattled from the bed grabbing everyone's attention. Josh's eyes opened, and then he had to struggle to focus on who was in the room.

"Tony?" He asked weakly.

Tony stepped forward. "Yeah, I'm here." Ziva stood. "We're both here." Tony explained, unsure if Josh could even see her.

He did. He smiled slightly. "Ziva. I didn't think you'd come." He rasped.

She shook her head. "Don't be silly. Of course I would come."

Josh struggled to raise his hand from the bed, pointing a shaking finger at Ziva. "You used a contraction. I knew he'd be good for you." He joked, chucking his finger in Tony's direction before his hand dropped unceremoniously to the bed.

Ziva smiled slightly, but sadness quickly overtook her as tears slid down her face.

Josh shook his head. "No." He struggled to raise his hand again, waving Ziva closer. "Come here." He whispered.

Ziva moved to the bed and sat on the side. Josh looked towards Eden and waved her over as well. She sat on the bed on the other side. Both women almost as if speaking telepathically, laid down gently and nestled against Josh's shoulders.

Josh sighed slightly and smiled. He looked at Tony and again raised his hand. "You too Tony." He invited.

Tony shuffled his feet but moved to the bed, sitting next to Ziva where he was close to Josh but still with physical proximity to her if she needed him.

Josh's eyes drifted closed for several moments before opening again. Tony felt as if he could see the life draining from him.

"I always knew I'd get both of you in bed with me at the same time. This is my lifelong fantasy." He again teased.

Ziva and Eden both smiled. Josh focused on Tony and frowned a bit. "Sorry Tony, but you were never part of that fantasy."

Tony smiled too then, putting his hands out in front of him almost to say; 'That's okay.'

Josh hugged his lifelong friends to him, drawing from their strength. "I- wasn't sure if… if any of you would come after what I did." He admitted.

Ziva turned her head to him. "Do not even think that. My problems with my mother are just that… my problems. I cannot expect everyone else in my life to forget she exists."

He sighed, the sound coming more as a rattle than a breath. "I'm glad." He said quietly.

He sat quietly, looking at the people surrounding him. The quietness in the room was unnerving, allowing the only sounds in the room to be the hum of the machines monitoring Josh's condition and his rattled breathing.

Eden suddenly spoke up. "Do you guys remember when we were seven and we put all of our allowance together and bought that can of itching powder?"

Josh and Ziva both smiled. "We were mad at my Father because he would not let me go swimming to Haifa with you two. So we were putting it in all of his socks when Mother caught us." Ziva remembered with a chuckle.

"Yeah, we thought we were going to be in so much trouble. But then she gave us instructions." Eden finished with a small laugh.

"What kind of instructions?" Tony asked.

"She showed us how to put it in his boxers." Eden said laughing again. Ziva's smile turned into a chuckle.

"Only… these two wimps- they didn't want…. To touch a boys underwear. So I had to hold them all while they sprinkled the powder." Josh laughed lightly.

Tony chuckled. "I would have paid money to see Eli hopping around." He said, bringing laughter from everyone.

Ziva's smile suddenly faded. "Poor mother had to rewash all of his clothes. Every last one of them. She had a mountain of laundry as tall as she was. I felt so bad. But she never told Father the truth."

"What did he think happened?" Tony asked, genuinely interested.

Ziva didn't speak, Eden didn't make eye contact. Finally, Josh finished; "He thought Ari did it."

"He never denied it either." Eden said softly.

Ziva shook her head. "He figured it was us who did it. Ari would never get us in trouble."

"Now it's Jake's turn to make friends and cause all kinds of havoc."

Tony and Ziva both cringed. Josh chuckled softly, the motion causing him to lose his breath. "I think- there's plenty of trouble left for you all to get in… without me."

Tony felt Ziva stiffen, and the small bit of happiness that was on Eden's face faded quickly.

"Don't…. guys, please. We knew this was coming… I'm at peace with it. You should be too."

Both women began to cry again. Tony was so proud of Ziva when she turned her tear stained face to Josh and told him; "We will be fine. We just do not want to see you suffer any longer."

Josh smiled softly and closed his eyes, resting back against his pillows. "Strangely enough, I'm not feeling anything. I haven't felt any pain for hours."

Tony's brows furrowed, wondering what he meant.

"When…Rivka left earlier. I.. dreamed of her."

"Rivka?" Tony asked.

Josh shook his head slightly.

"Tali." Ziva said softly.

"I- I was trying to apologize… but she just laughed. I tried again and she kissed me on the cheek. When I woke up-"He didn't finish.

"Maybe she was trying to tell you that you had nothing to apologize for." Ziva pointed out.

"Ziva-"He started but she shook her head. "So much pain because-"

"No. Dammit Josh we have gone over this for years. Listen to me.** BELIEVE ME**." Ziva turned and placed a hand on his cheek. "**IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT**."

He didn't argue. Tony guessed that it wasn't because he didn't want to; it was because he physically couldn't.

"I- I never… want to see- any of you…with that kind of pain." He said. "I want- you to be safe." He placed a hand in Eden's hair. ".. and you to be happy." He placed his other hand in Ziva's hair. "I… I laid as many roadways as I could- you all have the hard part in…f…following them."

Josh was really starting to struggle now. His monitor beeped slightly, bringing a nurse in. She quietly looked over the scene in front of her and increased the oxygen flow to his nasal cannula. She disappeared again after resetting the monitor.

He breathed in the new flow of oxygen for several moments before reached out and picking up Ziva's hand, still adorning her brand new engagement ring. Eden noticed it for the first time and smiled.

"I see—some have started running down that path at full speed." He said with a soft smile.

Ziva sniffled before smiling. Josh reached out a hand to Tony. "Take care of them man." Josh struggled out, attempting to shake Tony's hand but only being able to squeeze it.

Tony felt his eyes begin to sting. "I will- I promise. You've given me everything I've ever wanted, plus some. I'll never let Jacob forget you." He said, struggling to stay strong.

Josh nodded slightly and turned to Eden. "You warrior princess…. Keep enjoying life to the fullest. Keep laughing and partying… as long as it's far away from Mossad. "

Eden was crying heavily but managed to smile and nod. "My Mossad days are long gone. I promise you I will never again step foot in that place."

Josh looked satisfied. "Ziva…" He struggled to breathe again, so she took the initiative.

"I cannot thank you for everything you have given me. Jacob… giving Tony and me that shove we needed. I can never repay you." She said softly.

He smiled slightly before opening his eyes. "You already have… with your friendship. W-watching you recover from S-Somalia… gave me the strength to get my life in order. And it still gives me strength now to be able to let go. "

His breathing became shallow, coming in quick succession. Tony watched on the monitor as his heart rate began to drop as did his blood pressure.

"All of you leave here tonight. Be happy. Enjoy life. "He put his hands in Eden and Ziva's hair again. "I- I'll hug Tali and Ari for all of us."

Ziva began crying harder. She reached across Josh and placed her hand on Eden. "And Michael too." Ziva said, looking Eden straight in the eyes, bringing a sad smile from her.

"Michael too." Josh promised.

He was suddenly quiet. Momentarily panicking, they looked closely and saw that he'd fallen asleep. Tony placed his hand on Ziva's back and reached across to touch Eden, nodding towards the vital sign monitor, hating himself for having to bring the bad news that all of his vital stats were falling.

They sat silently and watched him slip away. Apparently the nurses had been monitoring from their station outside. Dr. Boyd, Josh's oncologist, appeared after approximately fifteen minutes, sitting silently in the empty chairs.

It was only minutes later when all of his vitals were gone. Both women sat up and kissed him on the cheek before moving away.

Dr. Boyd was joined by two nurses, who quickly examined him and quietly pronounced his time of death. Ziva and Eden joined hands and began singing in Hebrew, words Tony didn't understand but seemed to bring slight comfort to them.

Once done, they collapsed against his chest, flooded by memories of what was, and what could have been.

To Be Continued


	64. Chapter 64

**Sorry I made so many of you cry the last chapter! I'll be honest, it was tough to write. But at the same time, it was necessary to move the story along….**

**Just a bit more numbness...**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 64**

Tony had insisted on driving Eden home although her car was in the hospital parking lot. She now sat quietly in the backseat, her head resting on the headrest, her eyes closed.

Ziva sat in the front passenger seat, just as eerily quiet. Her head was turned away from him as she stared out the window.

Honestly, both of them were worrying Tony immensely.

For some reason, he'd expected more of an emotional outburst from the two women. They'd cried at the hospital, but after the initial minor argument of him giving Eden a ride home, they hadn't said a word.

Angling into Ziva's parking space, he turned to announce they had arrived. Eden however, already had the back door open and was half out of the truck. Glancing beside him, he saw Ziva watching him sadly before unbuckling her belt and opening the door to exit.

They entered the elevator and Eden took her prior stance, head resting against the side of the elevator, her eyes closed. Ziva mumbled something to her in Hebrew. Eden's eyes immediately became glassy again.

"What am I thinking?" She asked Ziva. "I'm thinking that I should be ashamed of myself."

Ziva looked at her strangely. "Why?"

"I've spent almost every waking moment at that hospital since Josh was admitted. It wasn't because I had to do it, I wanted to do it. The last week or so has been tough. I've felt exhausted all the time… going to the hospital felt like a chore. I had to force myself to get ready to go. When I found out about your Mom being here I was so angry. How dare he keep secrets like that from us. And then I realized, I used that as an excuse not to go see him. His last full day on this Earth and I wasn't with him."

Tony reached out and stopped the elevator while Ziva pulled Eden into a hug. "I was not there either."

Eden pulled away. "But that's different. You have a new baby at home. He didn't WANT you there. He wanted you with Jacob. That was what was most important to him."

She reached past Tony and started the elevator back up, watching silently as the number continued to light as they lifted higher into the building.

They stopped and the door opened. Eden began to exit, but turned and held the door open. "He told me that he'd already made arrangements through his attorney. I have the number and will call in the morning. I'll let you know when I know something."

Ziva nodded quietly and embraced her again. They clung to each other tightly before Eden stepped back and let the door close in front of her.

She looked at Tony quietly. "She is going to run." She said softly.

He was surprised. "Why would you say that?"

She shook her head. "She has always been that way. Anytime something horrible happens to her, she disappears for a period of time. Suddenly she will be back as if nothing happened. It is easier to move on and push it out of your mind than to deal with it."

Tony stared at the closed elevator door. "But… I think her original purpose of coming to DC was to help you with the baby?"

She sighed. "It was. But that all changed when Joshua got sick. She stood by him on both our behalves because I could not be there. If she wants to flee to forget, I will not try to stop her."

Tony placed a hand on her back. "How does that make you feel?"

She thought for a moment. "I will miss having her so close. But if it is what she wants, I will be happy for her. It will not be goodbye forever, more of a 'see you later'. With Josh so sick, and Jacob, we really have not spent a lot of time together since she has been here. "

They arrived at their floor and exited the elevator. Ziva slowly unlocked the door and opened it, quietly peeking inside. Gibbs was still sitting on the couch, this time rubbing Jake's back in his last efforts to burp him.

He could tell by the haunted look on Ziva's face what had happened. Glancing at DiNozzo, he noted the younger man had a haunted look in his eyes.

"How was he?" Tony asked moving towards where Gibbs was sitting.

"Good as gold. You've got a special little boy here ." Gibbs commented.

Ziva smiled slightly and moved to take Jacob from him. She pulled the baby close to her, tucking the top of his head under her chin. She had one hand supporting the back of his head while she leaned down, inhaling his scent.

Tony watched her find solace in the baby. She kept her eyes closed for several moments before beginning to walk from the room. "I think he needs a diaper change. I will be right back."

DiNozzo flopped into a chair on the other side of Gibbs. He ran his hands over his face before addressing him.

"Thanks for sitting with him."

Gibbs nodded once. "Not a problem. I'll help whenever you need me."

DiNozzo nodded in acknowledgement.

"Did you make it on time?" Gibbs asked.

Tony nodded. "We all had a chance to talk. He fell asleep holding Ziva and Eden in his arms. He just drifted off shortly after." He replied, saying that last bit softly.

"How is she?" Gibbs asked, nodding towards the hallway.

Tony shrugged. "Quiet. In a bit of shock I guess."

Gibbs reached out and patted Tony on the knee. "Take care of business DiNozzo."

"I will Boss." Tony said, with more confidence than Gibbs had ever heard in him.

Ziva returned a moment later, looking haggard. "Tony, he is falling asleep if you want to say good night."

DiNozzo stood and nodded in Gibbs direction again before moving down the hallway. Gibbs stood and began moving towards the door.

"Try to get some rest Ziva." He said.

She moved and opened the door for him. "I will."

He stopped in front of her, his mind suddenly filled with the images of the person Rivka had told him about earlier. He saw the smiling, chubby cheeked baby with her curly hair pulled into ribbons, laughing as she played a game. She saw the young girl, dancing her heart out onstage but continually glancing to see if her Father had arrived to see her perform. He also saw the young seductress, using her looks and confidence to lure a mass murderer to bed before she sliced him from ear to ear.

But now, now he looked at her and saw his Ziva, a woman who had snuck into his life and stolen his heart; a woman who had helped fill this awful void that Gibbs never thought would be filled; a woman who had changed, turned her life into a complete 180 degree turn. She was now a wonderful mother, and head over heels in love.

And she was his daughter. Not by birth, but by love. And it was killing him to see her going through this. "Ziva, I just told Tony, but I'll tell you too. Call me if you need anything."

She nodded but did not make eye contact with him. He reached out and gently placed his fingers on her chin, lifting her eyes until they met his.

"I mean it." He implored.

Her eyes filled with tears and he released her chin. He wouldn't force her to cry in front of him, that was not Ziva's way. Tony had just entered the room and crossed over to where the two were standing. Gibbs brushed his lips across her forehead then exited the apartment, turning slightly to see Tony closing the door while Ziva cried on his shoulder.

'Atta boy DiNozzo.' He thought to himself proudly.

To Be Continued


	65. Chapter 65

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 65**

Ziva was already in bed before Tony emerged from the bathroom after brushing his teeth. She was laying with the blankets pulled back for him, but she was turned facing the wall.

He sighed inwardly. 'I'm not going to let you pull away from me.' He thought to himself, hoping that by some miracle, she could read his thoughts.

He climbed into bed and pulled the blankets up. Ziva tucked them around her shoulders but didn't turn into his embrace as she had so many times before.

Tony took the initiative by sliding across the bed and spooning up behind her. He placed his arm around her and rested it on her stomach. Her hand came up to her face, presumably to wipe tears away before she brought it down to take his hand in hers.

It was wet. She was crying.

He kissed her partially bare shoulder, clad only in a nursing tank. He then moved his mouth close to her ear, breathing in the scent of her shampoo.

"It'll get better baby, I promise." He whispered before kissing the side of her head.

She turned her tear stained face towards him. "Talk to me Tony. Please.. about anything. I- I just want to hear your voice."

He was at a loss for what to say. Several moments of silence passed before he lamely asked; "So how about them Nationals?"

He felt her shoulder shake slightly. "Tony. The Nationals are terrible."

"I know."

He felt her laugh slightly before she suddenly shifted and was facing him. She placed a hand on his cheek. "You are a dear, sweet man. Do you know that?"

"Only for you." He said softly.

"No, not only for me. You always have been. You just like to keep it hidden."

He shrugged. "Well, it was a choice between The Nationals or the Redskins…"

She thought for a moment. "That does not give you much of a choice."

He smiled and reached for her face, wiping a few stray tears away before cupping her cheek.

"You have not asked." She said softly.

His brows furrowed. "Asked what?"

"About Josh and Tali."

He shrugged. "I knew you would tell me when you were ready."

She nodded slightly. "And what I said about Michael. Did that bother you?"

He thought for a moment before taking a deep breath. His first instinct was to brush her question off and plaster a false smile on his face. No, he couldn't do that.

"A little. Not so much for me, but for you. Michael could've cared less about me. I was just an obstacle. But you… he hurt you a lot."

She nodded. "He did. When I found out the truth I felt so unloved. Abandoned by my mother, used by my father… the first time I fall in love, true love… it felt like you didn't feel the same. And then there he was, in his own way he was my savior. He made me feel like…like a beautiful woman. Like someone wanted me. He made me feel like I was loveable…. And that I could have that in my life."

"With him?"

She shook her head. "I was not sure at first. But then we started speaking more and more on the phone. I felt as if I had practically laid my heart out on the table to you and you had walked away. Yet he was always there. And then he came to DC to visit. I really felt like he might.. just might be able to provide what I had wanted."

Tony began playing with her hair. "I'm so sorry."

"No, do not apologize. I could have just as easily sat you in a chair, and admitted my feelings to you. But I did not. It was easier to dance around it , yet believe in my head that you should have gotten my meaning."

"I- I did Ziva. But… I thought I was misreading you. And then Michael was there, in our face. "

"When the truth came out, I could not figure out what was wrong with me. Why did no one love me? My own parents, you, Michael. I, of course, know the truth now. But then, I just could not comprehend it."

"You've forgiven him now." Tony pointed out.

She shrugged. "Not so much forgiven him, as come to an understanding of what he did. That letter to Eden, that was never meant to be for my eyes. He wrote in there about how, at first, it was just an assignment. He still held bitterness for me dragging our team back into Cairo and rescuing Jenny. He took the death of his fiancé hard. But then he wrote about how spending time with me opened his eyes to how misplaced his feelings were. By the time he had arrived in Washington, he was starting to have feelings for me… real feelings. He hadn't felt like that since before Hannah died. He felt guilty for what he was doing for my Father, and was afraid of the consequences if he told me."

Tony thought for a moment. "That would explain the drinking when he was here." He commented.

She nodded. "He used me, and he hurt me." She touched his arm that had long since healed. "And he hurt you. I cannot forgive him for that. But at the same time, I have come to terms with everything that happened. I cannot imagine being in Eden's shoes every time his name is mentioned. My coming to grips with the situation has not only been for me, but for her."

"What about Tali?"

Ziva cringed slightly before searching his face. "Tali was visiting me when she died. She was staying at my apartment since Mother and I could barely be in the same room for more than ten minutes before a fight broke out. There was this club she wanted me to take her to. I told her "No", she was too young, despite the club advertising as being for 15 and older. She kept asking and I kept refusing. Finally, she talked Josh into taking her one night when I was away. He, of course, did not know that I had already told her "No". They got to the club and stayed for a while. Tali met up with some friends of hers from school that she was hanging around with. Josh met some woman and was hooking up with her. Tali seemed okay so he told her he would be back in an hour to pick her up. He left and followed this woman back to her apartment. "

She was silent for several moments before finishing. "He was late, it was longer than an hour before he started heading back to get Tali. He was less than five minutes away when the bomb went off."

"Oh Jeez." Tony muttered.

"He fell apart. Everything did. It took several days to find Tali's body in the ruins. The Hamas cell that orchestrated the bombing took immediate responsibility. Father obtained intel on who the leader of that cell was. I… I took him out."

"How?"

Her gaze immediately dropped. "Tony, that is not important."

"It is to me. How?"

"I- I approached him in a store he frequented. Struck up a conversation. I… threw myself at him basically. He took the bait. I thought he would take me to a hotel, but he was stupid, and took me back to his apartment. "

She stopped again. "Go on." Tony implored.

"Tony, I do not understand-"

"Please Ziva."

"I- I got him into bed. He was relaxed and I was on top of him. I reached into my purse pretending to get a condom, he grabbed my hands and told me that he refused to wear one. I thought I was trapped. I was naked, my weapons were in my purse. I finally lied and said that I did not want him to catch anything from me. He laughed and finally agreed. I had him close his eyes as I slid a condom on him. Then I pulled my knife and cut his throat."

Tony stared at her silently. "Then what happened?" He finally asked.

"The information Mossad gathered from that apartment helped to bring down two other cells. I arrived back in time for Tali's funeral. I do not know how, but somehow Mother found out. That was when she went crazy at the funeral. Josh blamed himself for everything. He left Israel right after. We did not hear from him for weeks before I finally used my contacts to track him down. "

Tony nodded. "It makes sense" She looked at him strangely. "Why he wanted to make sure you and Eden were happy. It also makes sense why he's been in contact with your Mother. "

Ziva thought for a moment. "Maybe. Tony- why did you want to know the details on what happened?"

He shrugged. "You don't talk much about your previous missions with Mossad. And that one was important, it was for your sister. I wanted you to share it with me, even if it was hard to hear."

"Did you think I would not tell you?"

"No- I- I'm not sure what I thought. I just had to know."

"I… I would rather not share that part of my life with you." She said softly.

"Ziva, your past is part of who you are. There are things in my past that I'm not happy about. But, all of it together shaped who we are now. We can't ignore it, or try to forget it."

She looked away from him briefly. "I am afraid of that person I was then Tony."

"Afraid, why?"

"Sometimes, I wonder… even when I hold Jacob… if that woman, that cold blooded, carefree assassin is really gone. She was so much a part of my life for so long. I cannot comprehend that I can just move past the person that I was then."

"What about me?" He asked suddenly.

She looked at him strangely. "Do you think I could fall completely, head over heels for someone like that? I mean yeah, she could be fun for a couple of nights of fooling around. But, commiting my entire life, everything that I am, to someone like her? Do you believe I would do that?"

Her eyes were tearing up again. "No." She said softly.

"So what does that tell you?"

"It tells me that you are the most amazing man in the world. And that I am so lucky to have you in my life… and that you love me."

He smiled and leaned down, kissing her softly.

"And no matter what, don't forget that. Anytime you start to doubt that, just look in my eyes, see the love that I have for you there."

"I will. I promise." She said tearfully before burying her face in his shoulder. Tony could feel her tears soaking through this shirt, but he didn't care. It was better to let her cry than to bottle it all in.

Tony stroked her hair for several minutes. "You never were just a 'cold blooded, carefree assassin' Ziva. You may have let people tell you that, but I saw it the first day I met you. You always were so much more And you know, it's not too late Ziva."

"For what?" came her muffled reply.

"Josh, he said that he set up roadways for you and Eden to find happiness. Your mother is in town. You could go talk to her."

"It is too late for that. If she wanted to see me, all she had to do was knock on my door. I am sure Josh would have given her the address. She has not made the attempt at all."

"I didn't get a chance to tell you, but Gibbs met her."

Ziva pulled her face from his shoulder. "How? When?"

"I'm not sure. I don't even know how long they talked. Apparantely they ran into one another somewhere. Your mother knew who he was and introduced herself."

He watched Ziva's face to gauge her reaction before finishing his thought. "That doesn't sound like a mother who has given up on her relationship with her daughter."

Ziva didn't speak. She stared at him for a few moments before burying her head onto his shoulder again. Finally, after several minutes, she broke her silence.

"Tony, I tried to repair that bridge with my Father, it got me a little Israeli flag for my desk and nothing more. I cannot go through that again. Not now."

He nodded understandingly. "I know. I'm just saying, it's an option."

She nodded but didn't speak further. Instead, she slid her hand under his shirt and settled it over his heart. "We should sleep. Jake will be awake soon."

He smiled. "Yeah, and I am past the point of being exhausted."

She leaned up and kissed him. "I love you so much. And I promise that I will tell you that every day for the rest of our lives."

Tony smiled. "I can handle that. I love you too.. so much."

She settled back onto his shoulder and stroked the area over his heart gently. Tony struggled to stay awake until she fell asleep but his body wouldn't cooperate.

His last thought was that he hoped she didn't have nightmares.

To Be Continued


	66. Chapter 66

**Wow, your reviews are humbling me, really they are. My muse is screaming at me today, so we'll see how much she gives us before I have to go back to work tomorrow.**

**And if anyone is wondering when this monster is going to end…. Uh… there's still a lot of ground I want to cover…. You've been forewarned. LOL**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 66**

Tony's mind slowly switched back on and the first thing he recognized was the sound of muffled grunts. He jumped awake, immediately thinking that Ziva was having a nightmare.

Instead, the sight that greeted him was the back of a semi-bald head. Ziva was laying on her side, facing Tony and nursing the baby. She had Jake laying on this side, his back to Tony. The sounds Tony heard was Jake nursing.

"Are you okay?" She asked him quietly.

She had her head resting on one arm, the other hand behind Jake supporting him, her hair was loose and splayed out behind her.

"God you're beautiful." He whispered causing her to blush slightly.

"I think you are delirious. I am too tired to sit up and nurse, so this is what we do."

Tony slid closer to his family and gently stroked the back of Jake's head. The baby's hold on Ziva never wavered.

He noticed that Ziva was staring a bit wistfully at the baby. He leaned forward and noted that although he was steady drinking, Jake's eyes were focused completely on Ziva's face.

"What are you thinking?" He asked, gently touching Ziva's cheek. She smiled at the gesture but didn't move her eyes off of her son.

"I love it when he watches us like this. It is such an incredibly powerful feeling."

"I know. It's like you are the only person in his entire universe. And he's giving you all of his trust and love through his eyes."

"The eyes are the window to the soul." Ziva quoted. "But this, this is the love shared only between a parent and their child. There is nothing stronger in the world."

Her face saddened slightly. "Apparantely my Father missed out on that."

"And he's a lesser person for it Ziva." Tony said quietly. He touched the back of Jake's head again. "What about your Mom?"

She smiled suddenly. "My mother did breastfeed me, or so she claimed. She told me a story about how I bit her when I got my first tooth. I did not even wait to get a few more in. My very first tooth and I nailed her. I remember her breastfeeding Tali though. I used to feel left out when they had that time together. Sometimes, I would go into Tali's room and destroy some of her toys in retaliation."

Tony smiled. "I can see that. You were the apple of Mommy's eye until Tali came along."

She nodded. Jake had started to slow his eating. She reached down and tickled his cheek. But instead of him starting to nurse again he released her breast with a popping sound and pulled his hands in tightly. His face started to wrinkle.

"Oh boy, you did it now!" Tony said teasingly as Jake let out an ear piercing wail.

Ziva cringed and sat up, picking Jake up and putting him on her shoulder. "Shh shh, it's okay. Mommy has got you." She patted and rubbed his back until finally he expelled the air bubble that was causing him discomfort.

"There is that better?" She asked as she continued patting his back. Apparantely it was, and he wasn't done eating either. He began to root around on her shoulder, searching for her breast again.

"You've got to be kidding me Jake." Tony said laughing.

Ziva reached under where the baby was laying and unhooked the other side of her nursing tank, baring her other breast. Tony sat up quickly and allowed Ziva to sit between his legs and against his chest. As soon as she began moving Jake into position he started getting impatient. Once he felt her bare skin he easily found her nipple and latched on again.

Ziva chuckled and shook her head. "At this rate, he's going to be thirty pounds by the time he is six months old." She joked.

Tony stroked the baby with one hand and Ziva with the other. Reaching into the drawer next to the bed, he pulled out her moisturizing balm and squeezed some onto his finger. He applied it to her right breast that Jake had already finished with.

Ziva moaned quietly at his touch and closed her eyes. "You have the softest touch." She said quietly.

He smiled. "It's all the moisturizer I get to play with. He replied, causing her to chuckle.

Make sure the breast pad was in place, Tony lifted the right side of her tank and hooked it again. That was when he noticed Ziva's head was rolling to the side a bit. Did she fall asleep breastfeeding?

Tony shifted a little and her head popped up. "The next time he wakes up I'll give him a bottle. You're exhausted." He told her, kissing the side of her head.

She opened her mouth as if she was going to argue but stopped when he held a hand up. "Ziva, what happens if I'm not here, and you fall asleep holding him?"

She shook her head. "Tony, single women do this every day."

"Yes, they do. But they also aren't dealing with all of the emotional crap that you are right now on top of it. "

She couldn't argue any further. Jake seemed to finally be finished a few minutes later. Tony took him from Ziva and scooted off of the bed. "I'll get him changed and back into his crib."

She nodded and smiled. Tony got the baby burped, changed and settled in for sleep. He returned to bed and laughed softly. Ziva has fallen asleep in the exact position he'd left her in. Her tank was still unbuttoned and her breast exposed.

Tony applied moisturizer to her left breast, careful not to wake her. He hooked the strap of her tank and settled into his pillows. Within moments, Ziva had moved towards his warmth and was pressed up against him.

He smiled and pulled her in tightly. Just as his eyes started drifting closed they startled open again as the baby monitor picked up the unmistakable sound of an unhappy baby.

* * *

Several hours later, Eden slipped quietly into Ziva's bedroom and bit back laughter. Tony was laying on his stomach, his arms and legs in spread eagle formation. His hair was standing on end and his mouth was open as he snored softly.

Ziva was on her side, one leg handing off the side of the bed, her hair tousled in a way that would take her forever to get untangled. Her mouth was open as well and she was snoring loudly.

"It's a wonder anyone can get any sleep in this apartment." She said out loud, hoping to wake one of them.

Neither stirred.

She smiled again and moved to Ziva's side of the bed. She put a hand on her back and rubbed softly, mumbling to her in Hebrew.

"Is the baby awake?" Ziva mumbled as she squinted against the sunlight coming through the closed shades of their bedroom.

"No, not anymore. " Eden told her.

"What time is it?" Ziva asked.

"10:30." She replied.

Ziva sat up suddenly and threw the blanket back. Eden put her hands on her arms.

"Relax, relax. I've been here since 7. Jake ate about two hours ago. There was a bottle in the fridge. But there's no more milk in there, and I don't want to touch your freezer supply."

Ziva shook her head. "Thank you. No, you're right. I'll get up."

She glanced over at Tony who hadn't moved a muscle. She leaned across the bed and kissed his head gently.

"Rough night last night?" She asked.

Ziva nodded. "Jake was up so many times during the night. He did not want to eat, he did not need to be changed. He just wanted to held."

"He's a sensitive boy Ziva. He probably sensed the emotional upheaval. You said he acted the same way when you and Tony had that fight."

She nodded. "Possibly."

Eden exited to head back to the living room. Ziva stopped in the bathroom before heading into the kitchen. She was amazed.

The kitchen had been messy but was now immaculate. She could hear the washer and dryer running, and a basket filled with neatly folded clothes sat in the living room.

Jake was laying in his bassinette wearing a blue outfit that said "Big Guy" on the shirt. Ziva looked at Eden in puzzlement.

"Yeah, apparantely your son thought it would be funny to leak out of his diaper… from the backside. His sheets are in the washer."

"Ugh, sorry."

Eden shrugged and smiled sadly. "It was the highlight of my day." She held up a coffee cup. "Regular or decaf?"

Ziva thought for a moment as she sat the table. "Decaf. I will have a cup of regular after I nurse."

Eden nodded and started the coffee machine whirring. Handing Ziva the steaming cup she nodded towards the microwave. "Breakfast is in there."

She plopped down into a chair across from Ziva. "You did not have to do all of this." Ziva said to her.

Eden shrugged. "It was either that or I'd finish packing my suitcase and be on my way to the airport."

Ziva felt her heart drop. "You are leaving?"

Her friend shook her head. "That was… my first instinct. I even had clothes in my suitcase. But… I can't keep doing that. I have to be here, for you, and for Josh."

His name came out as a whisper. Ziva reached across the table and took her hand. "It always seems to work for you." Ziva pointed out.

Eden just shrugged and smiled sadly. "Yeah, I get away from what is bothering me. But then I'm just in a strange land, alone, with the problem still looming over my head. But you, look how well it worked out for you."

Ziva looked at her strangely. Eden smiled. "You ran.. from Israel and from Mossad, after Ari died. You begged your father for the liaison position here in the US. It worked out well for you."

"I guess it did." Ziva admitted, smiling. "Well, I for one, am glad you are saying."

A sound from the bassinette turned their attention in that direction. Ziva smiled. "Apparantely, so is Jacob."

Eden smiled and watched as her friend scooped the baby into her arms and kissed him on the head. "Good morning little man. How are you today?"

Jake immediately snuggled into Ziva's chest, enjoying the warmth he was so accustomed to.

Ziva sat back at the table with her chair at an angle. She sipped her coffee and smiled down at the small face watching her.

"I swear Ziva, he's grown so much." Eden commented.

Ziva nodded. "He definitely has. I see how his looks are changing too."

Eden snickered. "Yeah, he's starting to look more and more like you."

Ziva smiled and grabbed her coffee again as Jake began to squirm. "Oh, I know." She said softly, unhooking and dropping the side of her tank top. Jake immediately began to nurse.

"I called Josh's attorney this morning. It seems as if Josh had arranged everything. He didn't want a viewing, or a memorial. Just a grave side service. He'll contact the funeral home and take care of everything."

Ziva nodded sadly.

"He also made mention of some papers he's having messengered over to you today."

Ziva's brows furrowed. "I wonder what that could be?" She asked.

Eden shrugged. "He didn't say."

Tony arrival from the bedroom interrupted their conversation. Not even caring that Eden was sitting at the table and he was in nothing more than his boxers, he stumbled to the coffee machine.

Eden eyed him appreciatively and threw a teasing look at Ziva, who was mock glaring at her. "I like!" She mouthed.

Ziva smiled and shook her head. "Look but no touch." Ziva scolded her in Hebrew.

Eden barked out a laugh before finishing her coffee. "Well, I've done what I can do. I'll let you know further details when I know them. "She bent and rubbed Jake with her finger. "Call me if you need me."  
She said.

Throwing a wave in Tony's direction, she was out the door.

Tony flopped into her now empty chair and took a long drink of coffee, burning his mouth but not caring. "How is he this morning?"

She shrugged. "He seems okay so far. He should be tired after last night."

Tony nodded. "How is Eden?"

Ziva looked at the closed door and shrugged. "She seems better. I was right, she was thinking of leaving town. But she changed her mind."

Tony smiled slightly. "I'm glad. It'll be nice for you two to have each other to lean on."

Ziva smiled slightly and reached across the table. "I have you."

He smiled and squeezed her hand. "That you do."

"And I have got you." She said, bringing her head down and kissing Jake on the head.

"And that is what Josh wanted all along for me." She told him.

He nodded. But before he could say anymore, a knock came on the door. They looked at each other in desperation. She was nursing the baby and he was in his underwear.

Bare breast beat underwear as Ziva stood and moved down the hallway with the baby. Tony shuffled to the door and opened it slightly.

"Hi sir, I have a deliver y for Ziva David."

"It's Daveed. And I'll sign for it."

The young delivery driver pulled the envelope back. "Sorry sir, her eyes only."

Tony wasn't in the mood. "Then you better come back later because she's otherwise indisposed and cannot possibly come to the door right now." He snapped.

"But it's all the way on the other side of town." The driver complained.

Tony shrugged and began closing the door. The driver stuck his hand between the door and the frame, stopping him from closing it.

"Alright, just sign here." The driver said, holding out his clipboard.

Tony scratched his name on the line, snatched the envelope and slammed the door in the kid's face. Tony went and found Ziva rocking the baby in his nursery. Tony held the envelope up.

"Special delivery to Ms. Ziva David from the Law Offices of blah blah blah" Tony read.

Ziva smiled. Balancing the baby in the crook of her arm she took the envelope and peeled open the top. "I wonder what this could be?"

To Be Continued


	67. Chapter 67

**Okay, so I was asked nicely not to leave everyone hanging, so here we are. I don't know what y'all expect Ziva to be getting in the mail. LOL**

**And wow, over 800 reviews. "Thank You" doesn't even seem to be adequate anymore.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 67**

Ziva tore open the top of the envelope and slid the papers out. She read the cover letter carefully, then flipped to the second page.

It was different, not even half the size of regular letter sized paper. Ziva studied it closely before her face lit into a beautiful smile.

She looked up at Tony. "It is Jake's edited birth certificate." She held it out to him to study.

"Jacob Anthony DiNozzo." He read. He looked at her strangely. "His middle name is Anthony? I never knew."

She nodded, the smile still adorning her face. "Josh's Father was named Anthony. It worked two-fold."

Tony continued to study the birth certificate. There, in typed bold letters it read: "This certifies that Jacob Anthony DiNozzo was born to Ziva David and Anthony DiNozzo Jr-" His voice trailed off before he reached the baby's date of birth.

His eyes were stinging, which he tried to hold back.

Ziva didn't notice as she was focused on the baby. "Did you hear that Jake? It is official!"

She looked up and Tony but became concerned when she saw the expression on his face. "Tony?" She asked.

He put the papers down on the changing table and reached his hands out for the baby. Ziva gladly gave him over. The moment Tony felt his soft skin against his cheek he couldn't hold back anymore, the tears began to fall.

Ziva rose from her seat quickly, concerned over Tony's behavior. "Is this not what you wanted?" She asked him.

He shook his head and smiled, despite the tears on his face. "It's everything I wanted. It's just- hard to believe it's really happening."

She relaxed immediately and wrapped her arm around Tony, the other around Jake. He kissed the top of her head before looking at the baby, who was studying him.

"Now Daddy can teach you so many bad things, and there's nothing Mommy can do about it." He told the baby.

Ziva smiled, laying her head on Tony's shoulder and staring at the baby. "I'm in so much trouble."

"Ha, did you hear that Jake? Mommy used a contraction. That's the first thing I'm going to teach you."

She shook her head and slapped his arm gently. Tony smiled at her and then made a face at the baby. Jake, in return, opened his mouth and stuck his tongue out slightly.

"Great." Ziva muttered as Tony laughed gleefully.

Ziva's cellphone began to ring from the living room. She grabbed the papers on her way out of the nursery. She glanced at the caller ID, noting Eden's number on the display.

"Shalom." Ziva answered.

"Shalom. I have the details of the service."

Ziva grabbed a pen and paper and wrote down the details.

"How are you?" She asked once she had everything written.

Eden was quiet for a minute. "It comes and goes. Tomorrow will be bad. But, in the long run, I have to remember that this is what is best. He doesn't have to suffer, or worry any longer. That is what is important."

Ziva smiled slightly but felt tears welling into her eyes. "You are right. But at the same time, it's going to be hard not being able to pick up the phone and talk to him whenever I want to hear his voice."

Eden was quiet for a moment before she replied. "I will see you tomorrow. Again, call if you or Tony need anything."

"We will. "

Ziva disconnected the line and sighed, glancing down at the paper she had written on. Grabbing Jake's new birth certificate, she went into her bedroom and pulled out her fireproof box, carefully keying in the combination and placing the document safely inside.

Once finished, she went back into the nursery and stopped in the doorway. Tony was leaning over Jacob's crib, rubbing the baby's belly and humming softly to him. Jake had his arms spread to the side, his eyes were already closed. She smiled as Jake's face ran through the motions of nursing and smiling over and over.

Tony sensed her presence behind him. He turned and smiled. Satisfied that the baby was asleep, he walked to her and pulled her into his arms. "Thank you so much."

She pulled back and looked into his eyes. "For what?"

"For this gift. For sharing it with me."

Before she could reply he captured her lips with his own. They broke apart and Tony pulled her to him again. "Who was on the phone?" He whispered.

"Eden. She has the funeral arrangements."

Tony nodded. "When?"

"Tomorrow, at 11am. Holy Cross Cemetary."

He nodded, taking her hand and leading her out to the living room.

"I uh… I want to call my Dad. He doesn't even know about Jake yet."

She smiled. "Go ahead. I'll warm up some breakfast for us."

He sat on the sofa and dialed his cellphone while Ziva busied herself in the kitchen. She heard Tony sigh before he began to speak.

"Hey Dad, it's me. I uh… I haven't talked to you in a while and there's… well, there's a lot to talk about. So, call me as soon as you can. It's really important. You… you have a grandson. I can't wait to tell you about him."

Tony flipped his phone shut with a disappointed look on his face. Placing the phone on the coffee table, he grabbed the basket of folded laundry. "Might as well get this out of the way." He muttered.

Ziva nodded and smiled, hoping Senior would call back soon.

* * *

The rest of the day went by in a blur. Between caring for the baby, attempting some sort of housekeeping, making phone calls to inform friends about Josh's passing, and trying to grab a meal or two in between, neither Tony or Ziva thought the day would ever end.

Jacob was finally bathed, fed and asleep. Tony and Ziva collapsed into bed together, pulling up the blankets and sighing in relief.

"I do not even have enough energy to roll over." Ziva muttered. Tony smiled and pulled her to him until she was resting on his chest.

"I don't understand. He's so small, a little ten pound bundle. How can there be so much to do?" He asked.

She snickered. "Sleep my love. He will be awake in a couple of hours."

And awake he was. An hour later. Two hours after that. Three and a half hours after that.

By the time morning came, neither parent felt as if they'd gotten any rest. Ziva was pumping breast milk as Tony played with an odd looking contraption in front of him.

"Tony, if you cannot figure it out, it is fine."

He looked offended. "No, no I'll get it. It would just help if I'd had some sleep."

A knock on the door interrupted him while he studied the instructions. Ziva grabbed a nursing blanket and covered herself, a hard task considering she had the breast pump working from both breasts at the same time.

Tony opened the door and was suddenly engulfed in a hug of epic proportions. Only one person could hug like that.

"Oof, Hi Abby," He squeezed out.

She turned and started to head towards Ziva but stopped when she noticed what she was doing. "Ziva, I'm so sorry."

Ziva smiled softly. "Thank you Abby. And thank you for volunteering to watch the baby."

Abby smiled brightly. "Anytime. I came extra early so you can show me where everything is at."

Tony gestured towards the hall. "Right this way my lady."

Abby followed him down the hall to the nursery. He opened the door quietly and led her in. Walking over to the crib, he gestured to the sleeping infant.

"This is the baby." He said softly, teasing her.

She mock glared at him causing him to smile. He lead her over to the changing table and made quick work of showing her where the clean diapers and wipes were, how to work the diaper bin, and where Jake's extra clothes were just in case.

"There are clean pacifiers in here, but he doesn't really seem to like them too much. But, just in case." He showed her, stopping when he noted her staring at him and smiling.

"What?" he asked.

She continued to smile. "You. You're such a good Dad." She told him.

He smiled and blushed slightly. "He's an amazing kid Abs."

She gave him a partial hug before glancing into the crib. "He's amazing because you and Ziva are raising him to be that way." She pointed out.

He smiled again, proudly accepting her compliment.

* * *

Ziva was again hesitant to leave the baby, but knew that she had to. He was too young to go to the funeral. Plus, Ziva knew her emotions would be all over the place, which Jake seemed to be able to sense right away.

She stared quietly out the window, absorbing the colors as Spring was turning into Summer. Tony reached out and took her hand, rubbing it gently to get her attention.

"You okay?" He asked quietly, concentrating on the road in front of them.

"Yes." She said automatically. "No." She corrected sadly.

He looked at her momentarily. "Ziva, not to make today any worse for you but… have you thought about…" He paused.

"What?" She asked.

"What if your Mother is there?" He asked.

Her eyes widened momentarily. "No, I- I have not thought about it. I… I have nothing to say to her. If she is there I will simply walk in the opposite direction."

"Okay." He said easily.

"Okay? Is that all you have to say?" She snapped, catching herself automatically. She pulled his hand to her mouth and kissed it. "I'm sorry."

He smiled. "Thanks. I understand. This is hard. And we're both exhausted. But I mean it Ziva, whatever decision you make regarding your Mother I'll stand by you."

She smiled softly. "I never doubted you for a second."

* * *

The service was quiet and subdued. Chairs had been placed along the front, where Eden, Ziva and Tony had all taken seats. Amie and John Henderson were there, as well as several of Josh's employees. McGee, Ducky and Palmer all paid their respects on behalf of NCIS. But Tony couldn't help but think that one person was missing.

As the service continued, Tony turned and looked at the crowd amassed behind them. That was when he saw Gibbs, standing next to a woman with an all too familiar countenance.

Rivka. That had to be her. Tony surmised she was trying to avoid Ziva so she stayed in the back. More than likely, she had not even arrived until Ziva was seated. She had on sunglasses, but her face was trained right onto the back of Ziva's head. Gibbs caught Tony watching and nodded slightly verifying everything he was thinking.

'Don't worry. She'll be gone before Ziva realizes she's here.'

Tony turned his attention back to Ziva and Eden. They were both breaking down as people took the time to speak of Josh, tell funny stories, or just share memories that they treasured. Tony trusted Gibbs to handle that situation, he would handle this one.

The service came to a close, and as the casket began to lower into the ground Ziva stood suddenly, telling Tony that she had to go now.

Tony threw a look to Gibbs who bent and whispered something to Rivka. She pulled her sunglasses up and used them to push her hair back. Wiping her eyes quickly she nodded and began to walk away quickly.

Someone stopped her; several co-workers to the company both she and Josh owned. Tony hadn't noticed Ziva walking quickly across the grass. He jogged to catch up to her, putting his arm around her waist to slow her down.

Gibbs did the same with Rivka, who was nodding apologetically to her employees and attempting to get away. She managed a few steps when she was stopped again by someone else.

That was when it happened.

Ziva saw her, and froze.

Whether Rivka saw her out of the corner of her eye, or she had a sixth sense when it came to Ziva, she knew. And she turned, laying her eyes on her daughter's face for the first time in over ten years.

Ziva's face turned to steel and she stepped back, bumping into Tony's chest when she did so.

Rivka saw the change in her expression and stepped backwards as well. However, she turned and nodded to Gibbs before she began the long walk towards her car.

Ziva swayed on her feet. "Whoa, are you okay?" Tony asked, reaching his hands out to steady her.

She barely nodded as her mind was assaulted with memories and her Father's words that hurt more than anything. "Your mother never wanted you Ziva. You ruined her life."

She suddenly thought of Jake, and the look he had in his eyes every time he looked at her. "There is nothing stronger in this world than the bond between a parent and child." She had told Tony. Had she ever looked at her Mother with those eyes?

"Ima!" She called out suddenly.

Rivka, who was about twenty feet away, stopped suddenly and turned. Ziva stood glued to her spot, clutching Tony's hand like a shield.

Ziva looked deep in Rivka's eyes and got her answer.

"I-" she started then stopped.

Unsure of what she should do, Rivka took a small step forward. And that was when it happened.

Before Tony could blink, Ziva was gone. She's crossed the gap between her and her mother and had collapsed onto her shoulder. Rivka wrapped her arms around Ziva, both of them crying as hard as they could.

Gibbs stood nearby. He took a deep breath to calm his emotions at the scene before him.

Rivka lifted up and piece of Ziva's hair and brought it to her face, inhaling her scent and ingraining it into her memory.

"Mama." Ziva muttered, causing Rivka to smile.

"My beautiful baby girl." She whispered back.

Tony walked forward and took up position next to Gibbs. Ziva finally pulled away and placed a hand on her Mother's cheek.

"Soon." She whispered.

Rivka tearfully smiled and nodded. "I'll be waiting."

Ziva walked over to Tony and took his hand. He nodded once at Gibbs and threw a small smile in Rivka's direction.

She stood next to Gibbs and watched as Tony and Ziva arrived at their SUV. They stood talking for a moment before he kissed her forehead and opened the car door for her.

She continued to watch as the SUV disappeared down the driveway. Turning to Gibbs she wiped her face, unsure of what to say. He smiled and put his arms around her shoulder, leading her to her car.

To Be Continued


	68. Chapter 68

**Well, my muse hasn't been cooperative this weekend, so this chapter was a struggle. I don't know why she's in such a foul mood. LOL**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 68**

Gibbs watched Rivka closely as a myriad of emotions played over her face during the short walk to her car. The only sound between them was the outdoor sounds of Spring and the jangle of her car keys that clanged together in her shaking hands.

Gibbs reached out and took the keys from her. "Are you okay?"

Rivka looked at him through glassy eyes and smiled. "I am…no." She glanced in the direction Tony and Ziva had disappeared in. "That was… that was my baby girl." She raised her hands to her face. "I can still smell her shampoo."

Gibbs reached out and touched her arm. "Ziva has grown and matured into an amazing woman. You'll be proud of her when you get to know her. It looks like you may get that chance now."

She smiled slightly turning her attention back to him. "I… I hope so. I hope she doesn't change her mind. I don't think I could take getting such a small piece of her back and then-"

Gibbs reached his hand out to her. "Come with me." He told her. Confused and a bit surprised, Rivka took his outstretched hand and allowed him to lead her away from her car.

* * *

Ziva was quiet during the entire ride back to their apartment. Tony would steal glances at her from the corner of his eye as he drove. Sometimes, she was staring into space, others she was wiping tears from her cheeks.

He'd attempted small talk with her, but after receiving only one word, if any, responses he gave up that tactic.

"Ziva?"

She didn't turn towards him.

Keeping his eyes on the road, he reached out a hand and tapped the back of hers. "Ziva?"

She turned towards him. "What? Yes? I am sorry."

He glanced at her quickly. "Are you okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned.

She nodded. "Yes. I just… there is so much I am trying to process."

Tony thought for a moment. "It has been a strange few days."

Ziva chuckled and settled deeper into her seat. "Days? Try weeks. When I checked into the hospital in labor with Jacob, I was a single woman, embarking on motherhood with one of her dearest friends in the world. I had no immediate family to support me, just my friends and pseudo family at NCIS. Now… I have a son, I have you in my life in a way I never thought was possible, I lost Josh, but possibly regained my Mother-"

"I don't think there's anything 'possible' about it. Ziva, I saw her face. I saw the way she was staring at you during the funeral. She loves you and misses you."

He glanced at her quickly again. She was wiping away tears.

"I had forgotten." She said softly.

"Forgotten what?"

"How safe I feel in her arms."

Tony smiled. "The chance is there Ziva. You and I have built so many bridges in the last few weeks. Do you have it in you to build one more?"

She turned her attention back towards the passenger side window.

* * *

Rivka continued to hold Gibbs' hand as he weaved through the cemetery, finally slowing as they approached a headstone all too familiar to him.

She stared at it, her heart catching in her throat when she read the inscription.

"Shannon and Kelly Gibbs." She read softly.

He nodded, a sad look on his face. "My first wife- and daughter. They- they were murdered." His voice was soft and a bit choked.

Rivka squeezed his hand softly. "Kelly was only eight?"

He nodded. "She was… the light of my life. She was just so full of joy, always laughing and smiling. The last time I saw her she was sad… crying because I was being deployed. She was begging me not to go. Shannon had to pull her off of me. That's the last image of my little girl I was left with."

Rivka watched him quietly as his eyes became glassy. She moved close and put an arm around his waist. "Perhaps she and Tali have found one another in the afterlife. It sounds like they could be great friends."

Gibbs smiled softly and continued to stare at the stone, but pulled Rivka in a little tighter; enjoying the comfort she was offering him.

She broke the embrace and dropped down to her knees, gently brushing away some leaves and debris that had fallen onto the grave. Gibbs dropped to his knees beside her, brushing pollen and dust off of the headstone. Satisfied at the work they had done, he reached out and took Rivka's hands in his.

"I never got a chance to see Kelly smile again. All I have are memories… and photos. You have that chance with Ziva. She made the first step, I have faith that she'll continue down that path. Tony will help her find her way to you."

She shifted closer to him, taking the initiative and laying her head on his shoulder. "Thank you." She said quietly.

"For what?"

"For sharing this with me. For being here for me."

He smirked. "I don't mind. To be honest, this is strange for me." He had a far-away tone to his voice.

"Why is that?" She asked softly.

"I normally don't open myself up to people. Especially concerning this-"He gestured towards the grave.

She shrugged. "We are a lot alike. It is easier to close yourself off and try not to remember."

"Trying to stop the hurt." He added.

She was quiet for several moments, gauging the atmosphere around them. "I have no intention of hurting you."

She turned her eyes to his face and smiled.

* * *

Arriving home, Tony barely had the key out of the ignition when Ziva had the passenger door opened and was gone. He hurried to catch up to her.

"Hey, what's the hurry?" He asked.

She shook her head. "I… I do not know. I just want to hold Jake." She admitted.

He smiled and kissed her forehead. "I'm so proud of you." He told her.

She smiled and touched his cheek. "I could not do any of this without you." She said softly, staring into his eyes as they had so many times in the past. If McGee was here, he would be excusing himself to go hunt down a Nutter Butter.

He blushed, but reached up to trace her cheek with his thumb. "That's because I adore you. And I'll be with you every step of the way." He promised.

She leaned forward and their lips met gently. Taking his hand, she led him through the doors and on to the elevator.

Tony unlocked the door and pushed it open quietly. He and Ziva entered and stopped dead in their tracks when they were greeted by the sight before them.

The apartment was as immaculate as they had left it. Abby however, looked as if she had been through the ringer.

Her face was flush, her ponytails uneven with wisps of hair falling from both of them. Her eyes held a bit of exacerbation.

"Oh hey, you guys are home! I gotta go."

She had grabbed her bag and was already on her way towards the door. Tony and Ziva exchanged a look.

"Abby, how did it go?" Ziva asked.

Abby looked at her as if just realizing she was in the room. "Oh fine. He ate about two hours ago. Bye!" and with that, she disappeared out the door.

Tony closed the door and looked at Ziva with wide eyes. "What was THAT?"

Ziva shook her head. "I have no idea." She dropped her purse on the coffee table and kicked off her shoes. She went into the nursery in search of Jake.

Leaning over the crib, she smiled when she saw his small brown eyes staring up at her. "Hey little man. Did you have a good time with Aunt Abby? What did you do to her?"

She noticed the glint in Jake's eyes; almost as if he held a huge secret that he wasn't going to share. She reached down and scooped him up into her arms. She quickly checked his diaper and satisfied that he didn't need to be changed, walked into the living room with him.

"There he is." Tony said softly as Ziva sat next to him on the couch. Tony leaned over so Jake could see him. "Hey there, did you miss Mommy and Daddy?"

Jake yawned as if he was bored with the whole situation causing Tony and Ziva to smile. "He seems okay. I cannot imagine what was wrong with Abby."

Tony shrugged. "Me either. He's behaving just fine."

Jake blinked his eyes, batting his long lashes at his parents. They continued talking to him and snuggling together for a short period of time before Jake decided it was time to eat again.

Ziva unbuttoned her blouse and slid if off her shoulders. It wasn't the best shirt to wear and nurse, and she didn't want to run the risk of Jake spitting up on it.

Tony wrapped his arm around Ziva's shoulder and pulled her close. They took turns touching and stroking Jake as he ate.

Jake was taking his time filling his belly. Ziva looked up at Tony. "Was Gibbs at the funeral with my Mother?" She asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know if they arrived together. They apparently are friendly with one another. I just don't know." He smiled at her for a moment. "You look a lot like her."

Ziva nodded. "I always have. Ari always looked like Father when he was younger. But Tali and I, we always took after Mother."

They watched Jake quietly for a while. "You know, you could start with something small if you wanted to."

She looked at him with a puzzled look on her face.

"Your Mom. You could start off by maybe inviting her over for dinner or something along those lines. That way you'd be comfortable here. "

She nodded. "Perhaps. But right now, I just want to finish up here, change out of these clothes and get some sleep." She looked down at the baby whose eyes were partially closed.

"Are you going to let Mommy and Daddy take a nap?" She asked Jake.

Jake's s eyes opened again and she felt a feeling of dread.

There was that glint again.

To Be Continued


	69. Chapter 69

**I've been reading a lot of reviews by disgruntled TIVA fans who think it is dead on the show. And trust me, there were moments where I've been so pissed and flown off the handle. Hell, I even turned an ep off right in the middle.**

**But guys, y'all are not seeing the beauty of the forest through all the damn trees the writers are throwing at you. You have to look with better eyes and just see the beauty of what TIVA has become. In earlier seasons, if these two tried any sort of relationship it would be doomed to fail. They are two wounded souls, who both had to figure out who they were as a person and what they wanted from life. Ziva especially had to break free from the persona thrust upon her by her father. Tony had to realize that he can be his own man. He's not doomed to be a playboy like his father, or Gibbs' good boy who always listens. Tony has always hidden behind Rule 12. He's used it as a shield. (Jetlag) With EJ, he went against Gibbs and guess what, he's survived. The world didn't tilt off of it's axis. Ziva has had her first real relationship not based on Mossad, or her hurt at being neglected by Tony. (Which I think is where her relationship with Rivkin started) She now knows what it's like to be wined and dined, to be given gifts and doted upon. She's never had that in her life. Tony didn't fall in love with EJ, nor did he ever pretend that he did. Notice that Ray told Ziva he loved her, she NEVER once said it back to him. What EJ and Ray have done is bring TIVA closer together. Tony sharing his food with Ziva, whereas EJ just came right in and took it from him. Ziva wanting Tony to be happy and encouraging him to go talk to Gibbs, which he did. Tony wanting Ziva to find happiness that he thinks he can't give her, so he encourages her to talk to Ray. His being bothered by Ray's (mine's bigger) moment in the men's room, telling Tony that Ziva thinks of him as a brother. Ziva's crushed expression when he tells her that he 'gets' EJ. Tony telling EJ "It's different for some of us". That was when EJ realized her goose was cooked as far as Tony was concerned. His world is all about Ziva. And when Ray and Gibbs were doting all over her, making sure she was okay in the barn. Was she making goo goo eyes at Ray, who was right in front of her? NO! She was staring at Tony. And most importantly, that elevator scene in 'Swan Song'. For the first time, Ziva dropped her emotional mask in front of Tony, which led to one of the most amazing TIVA scenes EVER! The physical attraction that started the moment they met is still there. But it's grown into SO MUCH more. It's love, pure and simple. Love like neither of these two characters has ever experienced, or will ever experience. They can look and search and experiment, but they will never find that connection they have with each other. They complete each other. That is what being a true soul mate is about. They are realizing that now, I think at this point, Tony more so than Ziva. She was at that point a long time ago, but he wasn't ready, and it all fell apart. She's afraid to open herself up completely to him again. But he'll convince her, just you watch.**

**The writers are being subtle, and trying to throw you off balance. Do not fall into their trap. Just watch, because I have faith that what's coming up is going to be amazing.**

**In a way, I hope that it is Ziva's photo that's in that envelope the new SecNav gave Tony. Imagine the scenes we'll get if he has to prove her innocence…..**

**Now as for the story, I've been reading where some of you don't like the sex scenes. And while my initial intent was to keep this story rated "T", I quickly realized that for Ziva to heal, completely heal, both physically and emotionally from Somalia, she's going to have to go through some not so great stuff. I changed the rating to "M" for that reason. I want her journey through healing to be with Tony, and it's going to take details for that to happen. Before Somalia, Ziva was a woman who enjoyed sex. That was taken from her in the most violent of ways. Her time with Tony is not just about sex, it's about her finding what was taken, and becoming empowered enough to find what she was missing. She's never had the sort of relationship with anyone like she has with Tony. That's going to take intimacy. Every sexual partner you have in your life is different. She needs to experiment and be touched. She needs to be reminded that it's not bad, that sex is a wonderful part of life. And that it is a true expression of attraction, caring and love, not a violent tool used to break someone. Plus, she needs to conquer those last demons before she can be fully, truly healed.**

**Damn, that was a pretty long author's note. I'll shut up now. This is just some filler, there will be more later.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 69**

McGee sat at his desk staring at the empty bullpen.

Tony and Ziva of course were off. Ziva's desk had been cleaned off for a while, ever since she transferred to the linguistics unit. Tony's desk was still cluttered, but McGee expected Tony to come in and clear it up anytime now.

McGee has expected Gibbs to come to work after the funeral. However, the funeral had ended over three hours ago, and McGee was still alone. He knew that Ducky and Palmer were in the building, as they'd all shared a ride to and from the cemetery.

He'd also expected to see Abby in front of him gushing about her babysitting time with Jake. That hadn't happened either. All in all, this was a pretty weird day.

The ding of the elevator broke his reverie. He saw Gibbs stepping off with a… no… it couldn't be… a smile on his face. He was accompanying a beautiful woman with long, tea colored hair and honey tinted skin. She looked enough like Ziva to be her mother.

McGee stood. "Boss!" He greeted rather loudly, happy to finally have someone else in the vicinity to speak to.

Gibbs stopped in front of his desk and eyed him closely. "Something wrong?"

"N-no." He stammered. "I just- uh, expected you back sooner."

Gibbs' amused look turned icy. "Well yeah McGee, I thought I would stop and grab lunch if that is okay with you?"

McGee's cheeks flushed slightly as he sat back in his seat. The woman who arrived with Gibbs threw a pained look in his direction before turning back to Gibbs. "Do you talk to all of them like that?"

Gibbs smirked and leaned against the front of his desk. "It worked for your daughter."

McGee almost choked on his own spit. 'Did he just say daughter?' He thought to himself.

The woman stepped closer to Gibbs, almost causing McGee to choke again. She was standing almost toe to toe with Gibbs eyeing him cautiously. "And she never flat out smacked you in the face?" she asked.

'Oh my god oh my god oh my god'. McGee's mind screamed over and over. He laughed…. Leroy Jethro Gibbs just LAUGHED! Okay, it was like a chuckle. But considering who it came from, it was HUGE!

"She wouldn't dare. "

"And what about the rest of your team? Young Timothy here and Tony?"

Gibbs glanced and McGee and smirked. "You see how quick it made him sit down. And Tony… well I think Tony enjoys it."

The woman snickered and stepped out of Gibbs' personal space. She looked over at the stunned agent watching the scene in front of him like he was watching a movie. All he was missing was the popcorn, soda and Reeses Pieces.

She stuck her hand out in his direction. "Tim McGee right? I'm Rivka David."

McGee stared at her hand for a moment before his common sense returned. He bumbled to his feet. "Nice to meet you ma'am."

Her eyes widened slightly. "Ma'am?"

McGee's heart stopped when her expression and tone turned to one he'd witness from Ziva on numerous occasions. "Uh… err. Mrs. David?" He half answered, half asked.

She smirked. "Rivka's fine." Much to McGee's relief, she turned back to Gibbs allowing him the opportunity to flop back into his chair.

"You really do have him well trained Jethro."

Gibbs smirked again. He nodded over towards the two empty desks. "That's where Tony and Ziva usually sit. She had to switch teams when she got pregnant, couldn't have her out in the field with that huge belly in front of her. She'll come back when she's off of maternity leave."

Rivka stepped over towards Ziva's empty desk and sat softly in her chair. She traced the desk top gently with her fingers. "This is where my daughter has spent the last several years of her life."

Gibbs nodded. "Another agent will be coming in to fill in for a while. I'll have to finish cleaning out the drawers for her."

Rivka slowly opened the top drawer and chuckled, pulling out a container of deodorant and a foil wrapped condom. "What kind of business are you running here?"

"It's none of my business what they keep in there. Tony's is probably filled with men's magazines."

Rivka dropped the items back in Ziva's drawer and stood, walking over to Tony's desk. She looked teasingly at Gibbs and yanked the top drawer open. She laughed.

"You don't know him as well as you think." She told him.

Gibbs' brown furrowed. "Why do you say that?"

She smirked. "Well, maybe he just reads the articles in his men's magazines because I hate to know what he's doing with these." She reached in and pulled out a set of photos McGee knew too well. They were of Ziva wearing a bikini when she and Tony were in Los Angeles.

Gibbs rolled his eyes. "I should slap that boy into the next century."

Rivka dropped the photos back into Tony's drawer and closed it again. "Now why would you do that? Trust me, Ziva knows he has them, and obviously doesn't care if they still exist."

McGee continued to be mesmerized by the people in front of him. "Well, I must be going. I need to go home and get these heels off while I still have some circulation left in my feet. It was nice meeting you Timothy. And Jethro, thank you for the tour, and lunch…. And everything else."

'Oh my god did Gibbs just blush?' McGee's mind screamed again.

He waved half-heartedly at Rivka as Gibbs' began walking her to the elevator. He stared after them unwilling to miss a second of their interaction.

"Ding!" The sound from his computer distracted him, signaling he had an e-mail. He only glanced away for a split second but Rivka was already on the elevator and Gibbs walking back into the bullpen.

McGee cursed inwardly and opened the e-mail. It was from Abby and sent from her lab, which meant she was back in the building.

"Uh Boss, Abby needs me for a minute."

Gibbs nodded. "Go." He said simply.

* * *

McGee practically sprinted to stairs on his way down to Abby's lab. Gibbs' smirked. "Make sure you get all the details right." He said in McGee's wake.

McGee was moving so fast that he practically slid on the floor as he stepped into the lab. He froze in place. There was no music playing. It was eerily silent. And Abby was sitting at her computer holding her head in her hands.

"Abby?" He asked.

She jumped slightly but turned to him. "McGee. You didn't have to come down here. I just e-mailed you fingerprint results."

She sounded sad.

"What wrong Abby?"

She shrugged. "Why do you think something's wrong?"

McGee walked closer to her and cocked his head to the side causing Abby to turn her gaze away. "Well, I just saw something interesting, but I'm not going to tell you about it until you talk to me."

Abby shrugged again. "Nothing. I'm just tired. Can't I be tired McGee?" She snapped.

He eyes her closely. "How did babysitting go?"

She winced. 'Bingo.' He thought to himself.

"It was, well you know, babysitting." She said softly.

McGee continued to eye her.

"Okay okay! Stop grilling me McGee! It was horrible! Jake HATES me!"

McGee almost laughed. "Abby, he's not even a month old. How can he hate you?"

Abby's eyes looked wild. "He does! He did nothing but cry the minute Tony and Ziva left. "

McGee put his hands on her arms. "He just not used to being with strangers that's all."

Abby shook her head. "No! It was more than that. He threw up on me, peed on me… and then when I tried to burp him he went to the bathroom and it came right through his diaper and all over my hand!"

McGee tried hard not to laugh. "Abby. You're overreacting. He was just being a baby."

She shook her head. "No, I'm telling you McGee. I could see it in his eyes!" She looked genuinely sad. "He's Ziva's son. I wanted him to like me."

McGee reached out and hugged her gently. "I'm sure he'll come around in time Abby."

She accepted his hug and returned it. "So what news do you have for me?"

To Be Continued


	70. Chapter 70

**So sorry that it took longer to get this chapter up than I anticipated. Real life really got crazy in the last two weeks. ::sigh::**

**Thanks again for all of your reviews and kind words. And, I want to send a special thank you to several of you who have sent me private messages, either here or through the Tiva board telling me how some aspect of this story is affecting you. Several have taken this story to heart so much that they have opened up about their personal battles, struggles and/or demons. It amazed me to no end that something born from my imagination can touch people in that way. Thank you to all of you.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 70**

The next several days went by in a blur of crying babies, dirty diapers, and no sleep.

Tony couldn't remember feeling so exhausted, yet so satisfied in his life. He tried to help with Jake as much as he could. But the feedings were all Ziva as she insisted on storing as much breast milk as she could for when she went back to work.

He was absolutely stunned by the bond they both had with Jake. Tony had heard his friends talk about parenthood, and how wonderful it was. He'd always scoffed, always believing that it was an exaggeration.

But now, he truly believed every word they said. And, more importantly, he thought they didn't speak highly enough about being a parent.

However, one downside he truly hated was what he was experiencing now. He missed Ziva. Yes, she was right in the apartment with him, and yes, she slept next to him every night. Well, if you wanted to call their cat naps sleep. But he missed her, touching her and sharing himself with her. They were lucky if they were able to move into position to cuddle together before one of them fell asleep. On a couple of occasions, Tony hadn't even pulled the blankets up before he dozed off.

So, here he was, lying in bed next to the woman of his dreams tired, but frustrated enough that he couldn't sleep. He didn't want to push Ziva any. She had enough emotional baggage going on with Josh's death and the return of her mother.

Her mother. Another topic Ziva had left unaddressed. He glanced over at her. She was on her side, facing away from him. She was breathing deeply but not deep enough into sleep to be snoring. He stared at the curve of her hip under the blankets and imagined running his hands over her skin and across her naked thighs-

He sighed deeply. If he kept this up he would have to take matters into his own hands tomorrow in the shower.

"I can feel you staring at me." She murmured softly.

"I thought you were asleep." He commented, feeling a little guilty as if somehow, she'd sensed his thought and they had woken her from sleep.

She shook her head. "No, I am thinking."

"About what?"

She shrugged. "A lot of things. " She reached behind her and sought out his hand and pulled him close to her. He turned and spooned up behind her wrapping his arms around her tightly.

"This is nice." She commented and sighed contentedly.

The sound plus his earlier thoughts caused his body to begin to react. She felt him against her rear and chuckled.

"Apparantely you think so too." She commented.

He felt embarrassed. "Sorry."

She turned her head slightly and looked at him. "For what?"

"I- I don't want you to think I'm pressuring you."

She smiled softly and settled back in his arms. "You are not pressuring me Tony. Your body is reacting to your desire for me. "She stopped and grinned slightly. "I think that is very sexy." She added.

He smiled. "You do?"

"And just think, I have my follow up visit with Amie in less than two weeks."

"Oh my God, I just realized what tomorrow is!" He said excitedly.

She smiled. "I was wondering if you would."

"Wow, Jake will be a month old tomorrow. We should do something."

She shrugged. "Like what? Throw him a party? Tony he cannot even hold his own head up yet."

"No, I was thinking of something more for him and you."

She turned her head again. "Like what?"

He took a deep breath hoping he wouldn't create a firestorm. "Maybe introduce him to his grandmother?"

Her eyes fell for a moment but she recovered quickly. "I- I do not even know how to contact her Tony."

She turned back away from him.

"Bull Ziva. Don't even try that. You know damn well you can call her office and get her number. Or, we can ask Gibbs."

"Why would Gibbs have her number?" She asked trying to deflect.

"Why are your avoiding the subject?" He countered.

"I am not Tony, I am tired. I want to sleep."

Even she didn't sound convinced. He sighed. "Ziva, I love you, you know that. And you also know that I'll support whatever decision you make. "

"Then why are you pushing this?"

"Because we're sharing our lives. We're raising a child together. You're wearing my pre-engagement engagement ring. I think I'm allowed to have an opinion here." His words didn't sound angry, or course.

"Tony-"

He kissed the side of her head. "What, tell me." He implored.

That was when he heard the two words he never thought he'd hear coming from her mouth. "I'm scared."

He squeezed her tightly and kissed her again. "I know. But I'm here. And Jake's here. And we can invite Gibbs too."

She was quiet for several moments as if contemplating his words. She pulled away slightly and reached for her cellphone. She hit 2 on her speed dial and waited patiently.

"Yeah?" Came the answer from the other end of the line.

"Gibbs-" She started, then paused.

"Ziver, is everything alright?"

"Yes, everything is fine. I just... I am sorry for calling so late, but I figured you were working in the basement."

Gibbs glanced around and smirked. "Usually I'm up. What's on your mind?"

"I uh… are you able to contact my Mother?" She blurted out.

"I can reach her." He said calmly.

"Okay, I would… I mean we would… like to have both of you over for dinner tomorrow night if you can make it?"

Gibbs smiled slightly. "I'll be there. And I'm sure she'll be there too."

"Eighteen hundred?"

"Sounds like a plan."

Gibbs thought he heard Ziva let out a sigh of relief. "Alright. Good night Gibbs."

He didn't reply, merely closing his cell phone and placed it back on the bedside stand. He reached out and touched the bare shoulder peeking out from the blankets next to him.

"Is everything okay?" Rivka murmured.

He grinned. "Yeah. It seems like we have dinner plans tomorrow night."

To Be Continued….

**A/N Now, I know that some of you were apprehensive about having Gibbs and Rivka together. But don't worry, this story is about Tiva…. Nothing more. I thought long and hard about it, and I just want Gibbs to have some happiness too. Just trust me on this, okay? =)**


	71. Chapter 71

**Just one short thing to say today with this chapter. Hey Gary Glasburg, how about you concentrate on stories and characters that actually MAKE SENSE (unlike Pyramid) and let the fans fill in the gaping holes in the scripts? 'kay. Thanks. Bye.**

**Bit of a language and content warning here guys.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 71**

The following morning, Tony crept quietly back into bed, careful not to wake Ziva. He lifted the blankets and slid in as gently as he could. However, her eyes were open and she was watching him with an amused smile.

"What?" He asked, trying to mask his clandestine destination.

"Is he still breathing?" She asked with a lilt in her voice.

He leaned up against the headboard and turned his head to look at her. "How did you know what I was doing?" He asked, eying her suspiciously.

She smiled and sat up, moving her pillows so she was mimicking his position. "He has been asleep for over four hours, which is unlike him."

Tony looked at her. "Uh huh."

Her expression changed slightly. "And-"

"And?" He prodded.

"And… I did the same thing less than half an hour ago."

He smiled. "It's nice. I feel like I actually got some real sleep instead of just a nap."

"Wait until he sleeps through the night for the first time. We will be a nervous accident." She stated.

Tony snickered. "Wreck Ziva. Nervous wreck."

She nodded filing the correction away for later use.

"Have you decided what you want to do for dinner tonight?" He asked her gently.

She was quiet for a few moments. "Something easy. I was thinking of maybe throwing a roast into the pressure cooker."

Tony thought for several seconds. "I don't know how to use that thing. If you show me, I'll cook it."

She shook her head. "No, it is okay. I will show you how to use it but… I have to cook for tonight."

He turned his head to her again. "Why?"

She thought for a few moments. The blankets covering him suddenly disappeared only to be replaced by her as she slid onto his lap and straddled him, wrapping her arms around his neck.

She continued to contemplate her answer. "I- I do not know. It just feels like something I need to do." Her brows furrowed.

He smiled as he reached to play with her hair. "I understand. But I will help you if you want."

She nodded slightly and touched his cheek gently. "I know." They held each other's eyes for several moments sharing their love and understanding.

"So what are we going to do until our lazy baby wakes up?" He asked with a grin.

She smiled slightly. "Well, the dishwasher needs to be unloaded and reloaded, there is a huge pile of laundry to do, the vacuum needs to be run, I need to use the breast pump-"

He interrupted her list of chores by grabbing her lips with his. She smiled against his mouth before returning his kiss whole heartedly.

They broke apart for air, their foreheads resting against each other's. "Or, we can just sit and do this." She murmured.

He smiled. "I'm okay with that." They kissed again, Tony moaning into her mouth when she shifted as close to him as she could get, her knees now resting on either side of his hips.

He sat almost gasping for air and looking deep into her eyes. He reached up and brushed an errant curl from her face.

"You're so beautiful." He whispered, lost again in her eyes.

She smiled and attempted to slide even closer to him. Tony closed his eyes and swallowed deeply, willing his body to stop reacting to her.

It didn't listen. It never did in all the years he'd been trying.

She knew it too. Damn her, she knew him too well. And of course, she could feel the evidence stirring beneath her.

She kissed him gently and quickly, but leaned back and began unbuttoning the nightgown she wore. The look in her eyes told Tony what she was up to. Part of him screamed at joy but another part, that damn rational adult he'd matured into, screamed at him to stop this before it got out of hand.

She'd barely gotten four buttons undone when he reached out and snatched her hands. "Don't." He muttered, his eyes slipping closed in another failed attempt to calm his body down.

She froze but didn't say anything causing Tony to force his eyes open. Her brows were furrowed again, her eyes a bit glassy.

"No precious, don't look at me like that. I want you so much. You can FEEL that."

She pulled her hands away from him. "Well then why can't we-?"

He shook his head. He took a deep breath. "Because… it's getting harder and harder for me to stop when I'm touching you. I don't want to lose myself too much and end out hurting you."

She was quiet for a short time. "But-"

He shook his head. "No. Not until the doctor says it's okay."

She still looked unsure of herself. She was trying to mask it but they'd gotten to know each other too well in the past weeks.

"Ziva-" He reached out and touched her cheek causing her to look him in the eyes. "I NEED to know that Amie says it's okay for my own piece of mind. If we're making love and I unintentionally hurt you… I would never forgive myself. And if I hurt you, and it scares you… it would kill me to see you looking at me with any kind of fright in your eyes."

She visibly relaxed and smiled slightly. She pecked his lips lightly and then touched his cheek in return. "And you were worried about pressuring me?"

He laughed lightly. "It's okay. I like this kind of pressure." He answered, trailing his hands through her hair, then down her back until he was able to gently cup her rear end.

Her eyes drifted closed and her breath hitched. "Who is teasing now?" She murmured.

He smiled and removed his hands, taking hers in his. "There is something I wanted to talk to you about…" His expression and mood changed slightly drawing her attention.

"What?"

His face flushed a bit and he dropped his eyes, focusing instead on their joined hands instead of her face.

"When… when "the time" comes, what…." He stumbled over his words.

He glanced quickly at her face and saw her puzzled expression, her head tilted slightly to the side.

'Come on Tony, just spit it out.' He chastised himself.

"How do you want to do it?" He blurted out.

Her puzzled expression turned to one of pure confusion. "Well-" She thought quickly trying to sum up her thoughts. "I thought we would take our clothes off and-"

"That's not what I meant!" He said frustrated.

"Tony, whatever is on your mind… just ask me!" She implored squeezing his hands in encouragement.

"Protection. I don't know what you prefer, or don't prefer or-" He was practically babbling, speaking three times quicker than he normally did.

She placed a finger on his lips to stop his sudden eruption of words.

"Well, I never really thought about it. I mean… I did before but not for us." She stopped and thought for a moment. "I used to always be on birth control pills, and used condoms backup. That is what you mean, yes?"

He nodded, relieved that she finally understood. "Is there any particular… type that you prefer?"

"None." She answered quickly.

Now it was his turn as his brows furrowed. She smiled and released one of his hands placing it again on his cheek. "After Somalia, and again before we began the In vitro procedures, I was tested for everything you can imagine… some you might not."

He used his now free hand to push her hair back, finally setting it over to ear. She tilted her head into his touch, rubbing her head back and forth slightly.

"I wasn't worried about that." He said softly.

She smiled. "I know. But I wanted to tell you anyway. Amie told me that if everything is okay at my appointment, she'll put me on low dose birth control because I am breastfeeding. Birth control pills are the only thing that stop the painful menstrual cycles I developed after-" She stopped.

"How bad are they?" He asked, concerned that he'd never realized.

"They are irregular, sometimes I would go two or three months before I had one. And then the cramping would be so horrible it would almost drop me to my knees. The birth control pills help."

She looked sad for a moment. "That is the only need I have for them." She added.

He pulled her face closer to him and kissed her forehead. "I uh… I was tested a couple of months ago… everything was okay. But, I'll make a doctor's appointment again, just in case."

"Why were you tested?" she asked lightly.

He looked away. She gently took his face in her hands and turned his eyes back to hers. "Tell me." She ordered gently.

"I uh… made some not so great choices when I thought I'd lost you. I thought you were with him, and happy. You two had a baby on the way, and I was drinking all the time. Most nights I would drink at home, alone… my lights all turned off. The nights I did venture out… if a woman approached me-"

Ziva swallowed deeply. "You weren't careful." She completed.

He shook his head. "If I managed to get to their apartment… then I was sober enough to remember… or she was. But some nights-"

She stroked his cheek, looking at him expectantly. "Some nights?" She prodded.

He sighed and looked away. "I was so self- destructive." He commented, continuing to stare at the bedspread under them.

"Tony, look at me." Satisfied when she saw his face turn to hers, she continued. "I **know**. I know what that is like. I remember feeling like my whole world had crashed down around me and I could turn to no one. I remember wanting to hurt people that I thought cared for me… but especially myself. Unburden yourself Tony. I will be here to support you."

"There were… a couple of nights, towards the beginning. Women approached me…. they were as drunk as I was." He shook his head. "We didn't even bother leaving the bar we'd go into the bathroom and-" His voice broke as shame overtook him.

She reached both her hands forward and touched his cheeks, pulling his face to hers. She gently kissed his forehead, then his nose, and finally his lips. She rested her forehead against his to show her support, to allow him to alleviate the shame that he'd kept buried deep.

"One night… the last night I was that stupid… I didn't even bother taking this brunette into a stall. She had hair like yours… I thought I could close my eyes and pretend she was you. She was so drunk… or probably worse… as soon as we got into the ladies room she hiked her skirt up and bent over the sinks. I was holding onto her hair, pounding into the back of her… I had my eyes closed so I could pretend she was you. But then I realized-"

She swallowed deeply again. "What?" She whispered, struggling to keep her emotions in check as he confessed to her.

"Her hair… It didn't feel as soft or full as yours. I opened my eyes and saw myself in the mirror… and then it really hit me…" He rubbed her cheeks gently. "I would never disrespect you like that…. I'd never fuck you over some slimy sink in a grungy bar. I pulled away from her and ran out of that place so quick. I don't even think I had my pants completely up by the time I was out in the street. I…. I needed to call someone. I… I had to call you. I had to hear your voice… I had to hear you…. I called, but Josh answered. He…"

He voice broke as tears began rolling down his cheeks. She shook her head and gently kissed each and every one of them away.

"He uh…. He told me you were unpacking his things because you didn't think he was doing it fast enough. He mentioned something about hormones… I don't know. He offered to get you but I told him not to. I hung up."

Ziva's face turned thoughtful. "I remember that night. He'd moved into the guest room a few days before. We got into a huge argument because he still had boxes piled up all over the apartment. I was rushing to the bathroom with morning sickness and tripped over one. I almost fell. I was so angry with him." She shook her head. "My version of unpacking his things was dumping boxes onto the middle of his bed. So, either he put the stuff away or slept on the couch."

Tony smiled slightly, knowing that she was diverting his attention a bit. "So, then you were hormonal?" He asked, appreciative of her effort.

She smiled mischievously. "Very."

"I ended out calling Palmer. He came and picked me up. He took me home and got me into bed. I passed out… but not before apparently admitting to him how I was in love with you. I remember him looking at me, pushing his glasses up his nose and saying 'No kidding'."

She snickered slightly. "That sounds like Jimmy. He is a good friend to both of us."

He nodded. "When I woke up the next morning, I stumbled into the shower. I could still smell that damn bar on me. When I started to undress that's when I realized… I didn't have a condom on that night before… it was so stupid and reckless. I never did that again."

"It scared you." She commented.

He shrugged. "Not enough at first. I stumbled into work… almost two hours late mind you. I didn't get to see you too often but that day I was getting a cup of coffee… it was like you knew. You came in, my God you looked radiant. Your belly was really starting to show and you just had this aura about you… it took my breath away. You sat at the table with me and started chatting. That was what did it… I realized that I didn't want to go on in life without seeing your smile. I had to straighten myself up."

"And you did." She commented.

He nodded. "I went home that day and cleaned my apartment up. I was still drinking, but nothing like I had been. Instead of sleazy bars I'd go to McClain's. I knew the bartender would keep an eye on me. The dinking became less and less. The pain was still there but… after you had the baby, that diminished."

"How?"

"That first time you let me hold Jake… my whole world changed. It's so hard to explain."

"He wrapped you around his finger. He seems to have a way of doing that to people." She hooked her hands behind his neck and leaned back, laying down on the bed and bringing him along until he was settled on top of her.

"Except Abby." He commented once he was comfortably settled on top of her.

"Except Abby." She agreed, frowning. "But let me tell you one thing Anthony DiNozzo, Jr."

"What's that?"

"When we make love for the first time, it will be here, in this bed… just like this."

Tony smiled. "I thought you like it on top?"

She grinned. "I do. But not for our first time. I am going to give myself to you completely, not just physically, but mentally as well. I am going to lay all of my trust and love in you. And I know inside my soul, that it will be absolutely amazing."

He smiled and kissed her with all the love he could muster. When they broke apart, she had a wicked grin on her face.

"What?"

"Just thinking." She replied cryptically.

"About what?" He asked, knowing she was teasing.

"Do not think that it rules out all possibilities." She said.

"What do you mean?" He asked intrigued.

She leaned forward and whispered in his ear; "Do not think that later down that road, I will not appreciate you simply screwing by brains out."

He pulled back and burst into laughter. Before he could reply the baby monitor came alive with an extremely angry baby.

Tony climbed off of Ziva and watched as she sauntered out of the bedroom, continuing to tease him as she was heading towards the nursery already unbuttoning her nightgown.

He followed a few moments later. Ziva was just lifting the screaming baby out of his crib. Jake was undeterred and immediately his mouth started searching for breakfast.

Tony snickered. "Take it easy there big guy. Let Mommy get it on the table."

Ziva smiled and sat in the rocking chair, barely getting her breast exposed before Jake had latched on and began nursing.

"If you're sure you want to make roast for dinner, I'll run to the butcher shop down the street and get us a nice, fresh one."

She nodded. "That would be great." Tony smiled and walked over, giving Jake a good morning kiss. He kissed Ziva on the temple and disappeared to take a shower.

Ziva looked down at the baby in wonderment. His eyes were closed and he was nursing so quickly that he was grunting.

"You knew didn't you tateleh? You knew Mommy and Daddy needed time to have a good talk didn't you?"

Jake opened his eyes and blinked his long lashes, watching his Mommy's face as he nursed. Ziva had a feeling he was going to be a boy of many mysteries.

To Be Continued


	72. Chapter 72

**Hmmm… everyone's been quiet this weekend. Did everybody go out and get a life leaving me behind with my massive pile of dirty laundry that I'm still staring at? LOL**

**I don't speak Hebrew, so I had to Google certain words. I apologize profusely if any of them are incorrect. If they are, PLEASE PLEASE let me know. I don't want to butcher anyone's language.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 72**

Gibbs jammed on the brakes to stop at a red traffic light. He wasn't used to driving her vehicle, but he didn't want to offer to drive her in his beat up truck. And there was no way he was letting her drive.

She'd been nervous all day. A cross between pacing, hand wringing and nail biting had practically driven him insane. He offered to go for a walk with her, anything to calm her nerves, but she refused. She was afraid they would walk out of cellphone range and not receive the call of Ziva cancelling dinner.

Gibbs didn't even attempt to argue with her about how ridiculous that was. In a way, he sympathized. He might feel the same way if the roles were reversed.

Checking that the light was still red, he glanced over at his now silent passenger. She had her hand on her neck, stretching her head from side to side as if she was working out a kink.

He smirked, drawing Rivka's attention. "What's so funny?"

He shook his head, resting both of his hands on top of the steering wheel and leaning forward. "Nothing. I just think you'll be surprised at much you and Ziva have in common."

Rivka was quiet, again looking out the window and wringing her hands.

"Relax. She's not going to cancel." He soothed.

"We're not there yet." She murmured.

"No, but you acting this nervous isn't going to make it any better. You're making me jumpy."

"Hmm, and I don't suppose that has anything to do with all of that coffee you drink?" She snapped.

But instead of angering him, he simply smirked again. "You are definitely her mother." He said under his breath.

* * *

Ziva has just finished dressing Jake when she heard Tony arriving home from the butcher shop. Finishing with the last snap of the white buttons on his blue "sailor suit" jumper, she scooped him up off the changing table.

"Can you wear this for a little while without spitting up on it?" She asked him, moving him to her shoulder as she walked into the living room.

Jake let out a gurgle and then a bit of a squeal, pausing Ziva in her tracks. Tony walked over and leaned down until he was eye level with the baby.

"What was that for?" He asked him trying not to laugh.

"He was talking back to me." Ziva said with a roll of her eyes.

Tony grimaced and stood up straight. "Sorry it took me so long; the line at the shop was crazy."

Ziva placed the baby in his bassinette for 'tummy time' which immediately angered him. He started to cry, his hands curled into tiny fists. Both parents had to fight the urge to scoop him up.

"Jake, if you want to see what's going on, turn your head around and look." Tony said, squeezing his eyes shut as the crying became louder.

He looked at Ziva and immediately went to her. The closer to dinner time it got, the more erratic she began to act. The baby hadn't helped. They'd allowed him to sleep longer than normal that morning so now his schedule was off. He'd been cranky all day; not helping Ziva's frayed nerves in the slightest.

At one point, she'd attempted to breast feed and Jake refused, opting instead to take a bottle from Tony. This threw Ziva into a crying fit, and the reassurances from Tony that the baby was just picking up on her nerves didn't help.

Now, with the baby screaming, she had her hands over her face as if trying to ward out the entire world. He enveloped her in his arms. She immediately wrapped herself around his warmth.

He stroked her hair for a few moments and then realized that Jake had stopped screaming. He had turned his head and was staring at them, looking pissed that he hadn't gotten his way.

'Sorry buddy.' Tony thought. "What do you need me to do?" He murmured into Ziva's hair.

"Nothing, I cannot do this Tony. Please call-"

He pulled back and shook his head. "Anything but that. Ziva they're due here in ten minutes."

She stared at the door as if she expected it to suddenly fly open. He touched her face gently with his hand. She turned and looked at him, nodding with a sad smile on her face.

"Are you sure this is going to have time to cook? It's four pounds…." He stated, nodding towards the bag from the butcher shop.

She nodded. "It will only take about an hour. The vegetables take ten minutes."

He looked at her incredulously but figured she must know what she was walking about. He touched the side of her face again. "Better?"

She smiled. "Yes. I have to go get changed." She stated, glancing down at her yoga pants, drooping socks and stained t-shirt that she wore.

He smiled. "Go ahead. I've got things under control out here."

She pulled away from him somewhat reluctantly and disappeared down the hallway.

He took the meat from the butcher shop into the kitchen and placed it in the fridge. That was when he remembered.

Slamming the fridge door shut he glanced at the baby one more time before jogging down the hallway. "I forgot to tell you!"

He stopped dead in his tracks. She was in their bedroom, stripped down to nothing but her bra and panties. "Tell me what?" She asked, grinning when she saw the expression on his face.

"You do these things to me on purpose." He teasingly scolded her.

"What? Change my clothes?" She asked innocently.

He shook his head. "I ran into Jimmy and Breena at the butcher shop. You're never going to guess what they were out doing?"

"Grocery shopping?" She asked, slipping on a pair of black leggings.

"No! Well yeah, but that's not all. They were…. You ready for this? Apartment hunting!" he announced.

She stopped. "Really?"

He nodded. "Palmer was very excited when I told him that I was going to be subletting my apartment. I told them that we were going to be there this weekend packing stuff up, so they're going to stop by so Breena can take a look. Palmer thinks she'll love it."

She smiled. "That is wonderful. And one worry off our minds." She said, reaching for her blouse that was lying on the bed.

He nodded. They'd both been worried about combining their incomes and paying for two apartments at the same time. Renting his apartment out so quickly would definitely ease that burden.

A knock at the door caused Ziva to almost drop her shirt. Tony smiled. "I'll get it." He said softly.

He stole one more glance at the baby as he went by and laughed to himself. Somehow, Jake had managed to stretch his arms over his head and with the way he had his legs, it looked like he was flying like Superman.

Glancing through the peep hole, he reached for the knob.

* * *

Outside, Rivka stepped back from the door causing Gibbs to toss one of his "Tony glares" at her. "Do you think they're not going to answer the door?" He asked her incredulously.

She shrugged, but before she could answer the door opened.

"Hey Boss!" Tony said, overly happy.

Gibbs merely nodded and placed his arm at the small of Rivka's back, practically pushing her forward.

"DiNozzo, meet your Mother in Law." He replied simply.

Having her this close, just a few feet in front of him, Tony was suddenly overcome with the same nervousness Ziva had been experiencing all day. This woman had given birth to, and help mold Ziva into the woman she is today. And yet, she also destroyed her at a time when she needed her the most.

But at the same time, her striking resemblance to Ziva was almost uncanny. He'd always believed that Ziva looked a bit like her Father, until now.

Politely, he stuck out his hand.

"Anthony DiNozzo."

Rivka reached out to take his hand and Tony couldn't help but notice the slight tremble. "It's nice to finally meet you."

He stepped back and held his arm out, gesturing for them to enter the apartment. Gibbs let Rivka go first, throwing a glance to DiNozzo before following her.

"The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, huh Boss?" Tony quipped.

Rivka turned to the two men. "Are we having apples with dinner?"

Tony grinned trying not to laugh. "Uh no." Oh yes, that apple barely fell from the branch.

She was no longer paying attention. Her eyes were scanning around the apartment in search of one thing.

"Shalom Ima." A soft voice sounded from the hall. Rivka turned and froze at the sight of her daughter standing in the doorway.

They were quiet for a long period of time. Gibbs and Tony were both on high alert, ready to intervene in case they were needed.

The two women stared at one another, almost as if they were having a conversation with their minds. Rivka finally choked out one word, in a soft, strangled whisper.

"Z-Ziva."

Ziva took a few steps forward, and then stopped, still not having reached her mother. Rivka mimicked Ziva's movement until they were just a couple of feet apart. She reached out and gently took several of Ziva's curls in her fingers, touching them softly before touching her cheek. Ziva leaned into her mother's hand, allowing the memory of the familiar touch to flood her body.

Rivka gently touched her cheek and then used two fingers to trace her nose and then her mouth, tears streaming down her face.

"Oh my darling daughter, I've forgotten how beautiful you are." She whispered in Hebrew, causing Ziva to release the floodgate of tears that she had been trying unsuccessfully to hold at bay.

Taking her Mother's hand in her own and caressing it gently, Ziva whispered one word in English. "Mama."

That was enough. Rivka held her arms out and Ziva accepted, finding the solace in her mother's embrace that she'd been missing for so many years of her life.

No one was sure how long they clung to each other, seemingly shedding a tear for every single day they'd missed of each other's life. It was Tony, shifting from foot to foot that drew Ziva's attention. She separated from Rivka and smiled, both women laughing slightly as they wiped their faces.

Ziva cleared her throat and looked over towards her mentor. "Gibbs." She said simply with a small nod.

He grinned. "Ziver." He returned.

She placed a hand on her mother's arm and steered her towards the seating. "Please, please sit. I just need get dinner started. Sorry, but we are running a little behind here."

She rushed towards the kitchen, Tony wondering if it was really to get the food started or just that she needed a few moments to escape. She'd pulled the pressure cooker out of the cabinet earlier in the day so as she plugged it in and set it to brown Tony appeared at her side.

"What do you need me to do?" He asked softly.

"Just be here with me for a while." She answered just as softly.

He kissed her on top of the head and placed a hand around her shoulders. "How about I make coffee?"

She nodded. "Yes, we will definitely need that."

Rivka sat quietly on the sofa watching them. As she worked on the food, Tony was busy with the coffeepot. And in the small kitchen, there would barely be room for two people.

Yet, they moved so fluidly. Neither had to ask what the other needed, or where the other was going to step. It was almost as if they shared a brain. Within a mere few moments, Ziva had the meat seared, and liquid added and the top put on the pressure cooker. Setting the timer, she completed her task just as Tony finished filling the coffee carafe and added it to a pre-arranged tray of cups, sugar, sugar substitute and creamer.

He moved to the living room carefully balancing the tray, his unsure hands causing the cups to clink together a few times. With a sheepish grin, he placed the tray on the coffee table.

Back into the kitchen he disappeared, dipping his head into the refrigerator as Ziva pulled out four small plates from overhead.

Rivka leaned over to Gibbs. "Are they always like that?"

He too was watching the couple. "Symbiotic you mean?"

She nodded.

"Yeah."

She shook her head. "Amazing." She said softly.

Tony came back into the living area with a tray of cut fruit with a pinkish dip in the middle. Ziva joined him with a tray of cut vegetables with dip.

"You two didn't have to do all of this." Rivka protested, looking at the spread in front of them.

Ziva shook her head. "No, no.. it is fine. It helped keep my mind off of things." She said sheepishly.

She turned and headed towards the back of the sofa. Smiling, she tucked her hair behind her shoulder and bent over. "Come here my little man, there is someone here for you to meet."

Rivka's breath hitched when she saw Ziva stand upright with the baby in her arms. Gibbs immediately grinned at the sight of Jacob in his blue and white sailor outfit.

Tony had settled onto the sofa and watched quietly as Ziva brought Jake over. Gibbs nodded his head towards the baby. "Getting him ready for the Navy already DiNozzo?"

He shrugged. "Ziva thought it looked cute on him."

She heard him and stopped in front of him. "He does NOT need clothes to make him look adorable." She argued with a teasing lilt in her voice.

Tony smiled inwardly and threw his hands in the air in surrender. 'That's my girl.' He encouraged her in his mind.

Rivka's eyes were transfixed on the baby. Ziva held him up so Rivka could get a good look of him. "Jacob Anthony DiNozzo, meet your grandma." Ziva told him quietly.

She bent again so Rivka could see him. Jake turned his head and was looking at the new person with curiosity. Of course, as long as he didn't have to lay on his tummy anymore, he was happy.

Rivka's eyes were glassy again. "Do you want to hold him?" Ziva asked, encouraging her seemingly startled mother.

She smiled and reached her arms out. "Here Jake, go see Savta." Whispered Ziva, handing the bundle over.

Jake settled immediately into her arms, pulling his hands forward and holding them as he stared up at the stranger.

"Hello little one. " She said softly down at the baby. She looked at Ziva. "He's beautiful!"

Ziva and Tony both smiled proudly. "We think so." He said softly, the emotions of the room affecting him.

Rivka sat back on the sofa, pulling Jake in tighter. She tucked his clothing down a little so she could get a close look at him. "He's changed so much since he was born. He looks almost completely different than the photos Josh gave me."

Ziva nodded. "When he was first born, I thought he looked like Papa and Ari, now… not so much." She admitted.

Gibbs shifted position in his seat at the mention of Ari which was not lost on Rivka. She rubbed his downy soft hair. "If I didn't know any better I'd say he was starting to look like- Well never mind." She stopped herself mid-sentence. Instead, she looked down at the baby. "You are adorable." She told him.

Jake's mouth opened as he batted his eyelashes at her. "And he's a flirt." She said with a laugh.

The presence of the baby eased everyone's tensions. Gibbs offered to take him once he finished his appetizers to allow Rivka a chance to get something to eat. She handed him over reluctantly, but had to smile when Gibbs held him up and asked; "What did you do to Abby?" before he tucked him safely in his arms.

Tony and Ziva exchanged a look between bites. "The day she watched him for us she acted so strange."

Gibbs smirked. "I found her practically in tears in the lab. She's convinced Jake hates her."

"Oh nonsense." Rivka scoffed. "He couldn't hate anybody."

Jake suddenly turned his face towards his Savta and he had that familiar glint in his eye. "Ut oh." Rivka noted.

"Ut oh? What Ut oh?" Tony asked.

"That look, that look in his eyes. Ziva and Tali used to get that same look in their eyes when they were thinking about doing something bad… or had already done it."

Jake turned his face back to Gibbs as if he was trying to hide it. The adults all grinned. Ziva put her plate down and moved over to sit by her Mother, to get a better look at what she was talking about.

He turned his face again. "See, there is it again." She placed one arm around Ziva as they watched. "You used to call it Tali's "smile eyes"."

"Smile eyes?" Ziva repeated.

Rivka nodded. She leaned forward to get some food, loving the fact that Ziva was still sitting with her, their shoulders touching.

"So Tony, tell me about yourself. I know so little."

He swallowed his mouthful of coffee then shrugged. "Well, there's not really much to tell." He started.

Rivka smiled. "Josh told me you were a police officer before you came to NCIS?"

He nodded. "I met Gibbs when I was on Baltimore PD. He sort of recruited me to NCIS."

She looked at Gibbs appreciatively. "And you… how did you end up here."

Ziva frowned slightly. "Josh didn't tell you?"

She nodded. "He told me his version of events. But I'd rather hear them from you."

"Well…" Ziva thought back. "Papa had sent me and a team into Cairo to work anti-terrorist ops. We were on a particularly nasty mission when we stumbled across a team of NCIS agents, working the same angle. The terrorist cell was being led by a rapist and pedophile. The NCIS team was being led by a woman named Jenny Shepard. Needless to say things did not go as planned, we were all ordered to pull out, but Jenny was captured. Me and what was left of my team defied Papa's orders and rescued her." She stopped at the memory.

"I bet Eli loved that." Rivka murmured.

Ziva smiled softly. "He actually did. He thought it was genius of me. I had no idea, but according to him Jenny was rising quickly through the ranks of NCIS, and many believed she would become Director one day. By rescuing her, she had a debt to repay to Mossad if we ever needed her. " Ziva snorted. "Papa did not know her so well."

"Why do you say that?" Rivka asked.

"Jenny did repay a debt. But it was to me, not Mossad. She and I ended out working together throughout Eastern Europe. Finally, I was recalled to Tel Aviv, and then sent to the UK. I hadn't seen her in almost a year when I suddenly received a frantic call from Father. He told me that he thought Ari had turned, and was working against Mossad. He told me that as his control officer, I had to take him out. He believed Ari has become a monster."

"He had." Rivka said. It wasn't a question.

Ziva looked at her oddly. "Yes. I did not believe it at first. Jenny contacted me later and told me that she'd just been promoted to Director of NCIS, and that she had a security pass waiting for me as soon as I could get to DC. She didn't know what my real mission was. She thought that I was there to facilitate the operation between NCIS and Mossad."

Tony's eyes met Gibbs and with a slight nod to the head motioned to Gibbs for them to adjourn to the kitchen, leaving the two women alone. Gibbs stood with the half sleeping baby and placed him in his bassinet before joining Tony at the dining table.

"Why did you think he had become a monster?" She asked Rivka softly.

Rivka's eyes dropped to her lap. "You and I were already having problems, he knew that. I was already devastated, heartbroken… confused. I always fought Eli and told him that he couldn't let the war destroy his whole family. He always told me that all of his sacrifices were for the good of Israel. And then Tali died… an absolute innocent in the whole conflict. I began questioning whether I had been wrong all those years… and then the night before Tali's funeral, Ari came to me. He bragged about how proud he was of you-" Her voice hitched in her throat. Swallowing down the choking feeling that suddenly overcame her, she continued. "He told me how you had hunted down the man responsible… and how you had killed him."

Ziva suddenly couldn't breathe. She closed her eyes and had to concentrate. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

"What did he tell you?" She whispered.

"That you had tracked him down, lured him into bed-" Rivka stopped when she felt Ziva flinch. "-and then cut his throat."

She took Ziva's hands in hers. "You… you were such a beautiful young woman Ziva. At that age, you should have been at University and giggling with your girlfriends over your latest crush…. Not…." She paused when she saw tears streaming down Ziva's cheeks again. "I kept having these horrible flashes in my mind. My beautiful baby girl and I couldn't correlate that to what Ari said you had done. But yet, at the funeral, when I saw Eli standing so proudly behind you… I knew Ari had told me the truth. And he was so proud when he told me… my god, he was smiling Ziva."

"It… it was the truth. I made my first kill when I was seventeen. But that one…. That one was the worst." She mumbled.

"It was personal."

Ziva nodded. "It was, but it was the first time I ever felt someone die."

Rivka looked at her strangely. "He was careful… overly cautious… I had to make him feel safe… or make him forget his surroundings…" Ziva paused again; cursing the tears that she'd lost control of. "I was… on top of him…"She said, her face suddenly flushing a deep color of red.

Rivka held her hand up, telling her she didn't need to say anymore. "When I was able to get my knife, and cut his throat… I was covered in his blood. I physically felt the life drain out of him…."

Rivka took a deep breath and pulled Ziva to her. She basked in her Mother's warmth. "That day… when you told me I was a monster. I believed you Mama. I really, truly believed you." She whispered.

Her mother lost control at that point. She clutched Ziva to her desperately, almost afraid to let go. "I'm sorry baby. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it."

"You did mean it Mama. And in a way, you were right. I held onto that belief, deep down until I came here… to NCIS. These people helped me to change… to see that I didn't WANT to be that person. I suddenly had this craving… this desire… to have a family, and friends. To grow old with a husband and watch our children grow. I wanted all of that… and I didn't know how to obtain it."

Rivka pulled back and wiped the tears from Ziva's cheeks. "If your Mother hadn't been so stupid, she could have been there to give you guidance."

Ziva smiled. "You're here now. I still need my Mama in my life."

Rivka laughed. "And that's exactly where I shall be." She promised, kissing Ziva on the forehead.

The sound of the pressure cooker beeping drew the women's attention. Ziva moved hurriedly into the kitchen area and warned everyone to stand back. Using an oven mitt, she hit the release valve and jumped back as a mushroom cloud of steam burst from the lid. The entire apartment filled with the aroma of a well cooked dinner.

Once the cloud had stopped, Ziva carefully removed the roast and placed it on a tray. She threw carrots and potatoes into the cooker and set it for ten minutes.

"Almost ready." She announced.

"I'll make the gravy." Tony announced.

Gibbs snickered when he watched him open the jars and pour them into a bowl. "Don't hurt yourself there on the microwave there, DiNozzo."

Rivka smacked Gibbs arms lightly, shaking her head.

Tony smiled and extra carefully set the timer. "Ha! See!"

He glanced at Ziva who was smiling but his heart broke. Her face was pink and blotchy, her eyes red rimmed. He pulled her to him, burying his face into her hair.

"Are you okay?" He whispered.

She nodded against his chest. "The best I've been in years." She replied.

Once dinner was served, which of course included Tony's delectable jarred gravy, the adults sat around sharing a lot of laughter, mostly at Tony and Ziva's expense.

The story of Ziva's first case with NCIS had sent Rivka into hysterics, especially Tony's belligerent description of Ziva stealing his breakfast burrito.

"Well, she was right; you should have bought her one!" Rivka exclaimed, siding with her daughter.

Dessert was simple, ice cream. Ziva insisted that they needed the room in the freezer. Gibbs seemed confused but when Rivka opened the freezer to get the ice cream out, she laughed. "Yes, I can see why." She told Ziva, indicating all of the frozen breast milk she'd stored.

Jake was ready to eat shortly after dessert, and Rivka had her first opportunity to feed him. Jake behaved perfectly, never crying once the entire night.

They were all surprised to see how late it was. Once the baby was asleep, Gibbs and Rivka felt it was time to say 'Goodnight' as well. Mother and daughter had exchanged numbers earlier in the night, and Ziva promised her they'd see each other soon. They embraced for a long time at the door. Rivka broke away first, kissing Ziva on the head.

"Good night baby." She whispered to her.

"Good night Mama. Drive safe."

Rivka snorted. "Ha, Gibbs drove."

Tony rolled his eyes, Ziva looked appreciative.

Rivka hugged Tony goodnight, but before she broke away made sure she whispered into his ear; "You are a good man Anthony DiNozzo."

Tony smiled and nodded, his cheeks flushing slightly.

Once they were gone, Tony turned and looked at Ziva. "Well-?" He asked.

She didn't answer. Instead she launched herself at him and grabbed his lips with hers.

Yes, the night had definitely gone well.

To Be Continued


	73. Chapter 73

**We're getting closer to some big stuff folks…. **

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 73**

Tony opened his eyes and smiled into his pillow. Jake had only been up one time during the night, allowing him and Ziva several hours of rest which they'd been severely lacking.

Once their dinner guests had left the night before, the baby had breast fed one more time before he went down. This allowed Tony and Ziva time to lay in each other's arms and process everything that had just happened.

Ziva had stated that it felt like a weight had been lifted from her heart. She never realized how much she missed her Mother until she was out of her life. She'd especially missed having her guidance through her pregnancy and first month of Jake's life.

She'd also felt embarrassed because she knew her Mother had been trying to reach out to her for a long time. She found evidence of it when she'd found the letters Eli had hidden. Plus, Ziva had all the tools at her fingertips in order to track Rivka down. She'd just never used them. Instead, she let her fear rule over her heart and suffered because of it.

Tony was amazed at how happy Ziva was as she talked about her Mother. It was almost like a whole new world had been opened to her, and she was planning on taking full advantage.

They'd touched and kissed, Ziva trying again to throw caution to the wind. He'd almost fallen for it too, especially when in the midst of their intense kissing session, she'd taken his hand and slipped it under the waistband of her panties.

The moment he'd felt the heat of her core he pulled away, almost like he'd touched a live electrical wire. She sighed in frustration as he shook his head in protest.

"You tried to trick me again." He told her, pointing at her in accusation.

She crossed her arms over her chest. "I almost had you." She said with a smile.

He'd laughed and pulled her to him, enjoying the fact that instead of sleeping on his shoulder, she'd climbed completely on top of him and settled her head against his heart. Eventually, they both knew she'd have to move, but in that moment, all was right in the world as they drifted off to sleep.

Now this morning, it was almost 7:30am and he'd just woken up. Ziva was already up, assuming she'd woken up with the baby. He stood slowly from bed and wandered into the bathroom. Once he was done, he went slowly into the living room and stopped in the doorway, smiling at the sight he saw.

Ziva was laying upright against the arm of the couch. She had her knees bent and Jake was sitting against them. She had his hands in hers and was talking to him, oblivious to the fact the Tony had entered the room.

He could watch this all day. Ziva was smiling and speaking softly, moving Jake's hands with hers as she spoke. Tony shifted position in the doorway which drew her attention.

"Tony! You are just in time!" She said excitedly.

He smiled as he walked in their direction. "For what?" He asked causing Jake to turn his head towards his Daddy's voice. Tony leaned over Ziva's shoulder and touched Jake's belly.

"Good morning buddy." He said. Ziva had released one of Jake's hands and he waved it wildly in the air.

"Someone is in a good mood." Tony said smiling.

Ziva looked at him with a knowing smile. "More so than you realize." She told him. She focused her attention back on the baby. "Okay Jake, let's show Daddy."

Tony's brows furrowed. "Show Daddy what?"

She didn't answer, but instead talked in gibberish to the baby. Finally, she picked up his little feet and began kissing the bottoms of them in quick succession.

And there it was. Jake was smiling at her.

He was wide awake; his twinkling eyes completely focused on his Mommy, and was showing them his first toothless smiles.

Tony felt a flood of emotions overtake him at once. He didn't know whether to laugh, cry or yell in excitement. He breathed deeply and smiled down at the baby.

"So that's what your smile looks like when you're awake, huh?"

Jake looked right into his eyes and smiled again, his first smile aimed directly at Tony. His heart clenched and in that split second, his world became a mission to keep that smile permanently on Jacob's face.

Ziva had turned her head and was watching Tony's reaction. Finally, Tony mumbled one word. "Wow."

She smiled. "Incredible isn't it?"

Jake's attention was turning back and forth between his parents. He seemed unsure of what the big deal was, but loved the attention being lavished on him.

Tony kissed the side of Ziva's head. "I could stay like this forever." He whispered.

Her smile deepened as she turned back to the baby. "Me too." She replied.

Jake swung his arms again and yawned deeply. This drew another round of smiles from his parents which he returned.

Ziva laughed softly. "Now you are just showing off." She told him. Jake didn't disagree.

"How long has he been up?" He asked.

She glanced at the clock. "I woke up at 6:45. He was already awake but was in his crib staring at the animals hanging from his mobile. I think they were having a big talk about last night as well." She said smiling.

Tony chuckled. "Well, I hope Mo the monkey, Harry the Hippo, and Gerry the giraffe offered him proper guidance."

She laughed and moved Jake to her shoulder so she could sit up properly on the couch. The baby relaxed on her shoulder, his head turned towards his Father. Tony reached out with one finger and traced his cheek, then his nose causing the baby to smile again.

"I'll never get tired of seeing that." He said.

She nodded. "I know."

"What time is his appointment today?" He asked, still attempting to make the baby smile as often as he could.

"915".

Tony glanced at the clock. "Oh hell, I better get moving then." He glanced into the kitchen at the empty coffee pot. "Want coffee?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to make it. The moment I picked him up he went straight for my breast."

Tony snickered. "Smart boy."

She pushed his arm slightly and smiled. He laughed and went to make the coffee. "Hey, what do you say we go to breakfast after his doctor's appointment?"

She smiled. "Sounds perfect."

They'd arrived at the pediatrician's office just minutes before Jake's appointment. Angela's smile greeted them the moment they bustled through the door.

"There he is! I was wondering if you were going to make it." She said, standing to get a glimpse of the baby in his stroller.

Ziva shook her head. "We need to get better about how much time it takes to get out the door."

Angela laughed. "Honey, it doesn't get better. As soon as you have one routine, they grow and it all changes. You just roll with the punches."

Ziva rolled her eyes. "Great." She mumbled as she pulled out her wallet. Tony put a hand on her arm stopping her. She turned to him and caught the intense look in his eyes. She knew what the look was for.

She smiled and nodded slightly, dropping her wallet back into her purse. Tony reached in his back pocket and pulled out his wallet, handing his debit card to Angela.

"Angela, I need to update Jake's records too." She sheepishly looked at Tony and then said a bit more softly. "His last name has changed."

Angela smiled and held up Tony's card. "To DiNozzo?" She asked.

Ziva blushed slightly and nodded. Angela bit back a laugh and opened Jake's file. "Not a problem."

She ran Tony's card through the machine and handed it back to him with a smile. "John is a little behind this morning so you might have a few minute wait."

They nodded and walked over to the waiting area. There were two children with harried mothers already there. One, a little boy with red hair and matching freckles, had mucous running down his face which he insisted on wiping on his sleeve before his mother could get it with a tissue. The other, a little girl with blonde hair and brown eyes was sitting on her Mother's lap, lying back against her chest. Her eyes were glassy and her cheeky rosy, a sure sign of fever.

Ziva steered the stroller to seats as far away from the sick children as she could. Tony sat and watched the little snotty boy sitting at the table and coloring into a coloring book. Suddenly, he sneezed, blowing fluid all over the table.

Tony jumped slightly and using his foot, slid Jake's stroller closer to them.

"Tony, Ziva hey!" A familiar voice sounded from the reception area. They turned their heads and saw Amie, waving at them before coming around the desk in their direction. She looked at the two sick children and went to open the door that lead to the exam rooms. "Come on, I'll take you back." She said with a wink.

They let out the partial breath they were holding and gladly followed her. She closed the door after they passed through and laughed. "Call it preferential treatment but there's no way I'm exposing Jacob to that!"

They smiled and followed her down the hall. All of the exam rooms were already full, so she called for Angela's attention through the back part of the reception desk. "Angela, I'll have the DiNozzo's in my office when Jacob's turn comes." Angela nodded her understanding.

Amie led them down farther down the hall. "So how have you guys been doing?"

Ziva smiled. "Good. I think he's starting to sleep through the night." Tony crossed his fingers on his free hand.

"That's great! That'll definitely help in the long run." She opened a door at the very end of the hall and led them to what looked to be a completely different office. The walls and lighting in John's office was bright and cheery, here they were a bit more subdued and earthy.

Ziva knew this area well. She walked directly down the corridor and turned walking into Amie's office.

Amie came in behind them and scooped Jake out of the stroller and into her arms. "There's no way I'm letting those other kids get their germs on you. Uh uh." She pulled the baby into her chest and was surprised when a big toothless smile greeted her.

"Oh look at that smile! Who's a happy little boy?" She said as she continued to play with the baby.

Tony turned to Ziva and was surprised to see her sitting on a small love seat that was in the corner. She'd kicked her shoes off and had her feet curled under her.

'She's spent a lot of time in here.' He realized.

Ziva caught Tony staring at her and shifted slightly, patting the seat next to her. "Sit down, relax." Ziva looked at Amie. "This is a good place." She told Tony.

Jake's eyes turned from Amie towards his parents. Amie laughed. "Oh I know Jake. Don't worry. Your Mommy didn't go far."

"I read that newborns can't see that far away." Tony said from his seat across the room.

Amie smiled. "They can't. At his age, he can see to about a foot away. But, he's very tuned into noise. And smell."

"Smell?" Tony asked, running through his mind trying to remember if both he and Ziva and showered.

Amie nodded. "It's Ziva. Newborns always know when their Mommies are in the room. They can smell their breast milk."

Ziva's face flushed again and Tony bit back laughter. "Wow… I did not know that."

Amie chuckled. "It really makes you feel wanted, doesn't it Ziva?"

Ziva just shook her head, continuing to smile.

A nurse popped her head into the open office door. "Ziva, hi!"

"Hello Maggie."

"Is this Jacob?" The nurse Tony now knew as Maggie walked over to Amie and peered down at the baby. "Oh my God, he's gorgeous. Look at those eyelashes!"

Everyone laughed as Jake smiled at Maggie. Amie turned to Ziva. "Your son is the biggest flirt I've ever seen."

She shrugged and looked at Tony. "What have you been teaching him when my back is turned?"

Tony just smiled and shrugged. Maggie stepped away and held up a folder that was in her hand. "Mr. and Mrs. Cummings are here."

The smile fell from Amie's face and she nodded. "I'll be right there."

Tony felt sadness emanating from the usually cheery woman. He didn't think the Cummings' would be getting good news.

Amie walked over and placed Jake back in his stroller. "Well, duty calls." She reached out a hand and touched Ziva's arm. "I'll be seeing you next week, right?"

Ziva nodded. "Good. If I don't see you before you leave, take care. I'll see you next week."

Once she was gone, Tony glanced idly around the room. "I can get used to this favoritism. Nice office."

Ziva smiled. "It is. I have spent a lot of time here."

"When you were going through the In Vitro?"

Ziva nodded. "Even before that. Amie does individual counseling in here. The group sessions she holds in a different room."

Tony nodded, understanding why Ziva felt relaxed and safe here.

Before they could speak any further, one of John's nurses came to them and led them to one of the pediatric exam rooms.

This was a different nurse than at their previous appointment, but she showed just as much care. Jake was stripped down to his diaper and weighed, having gained an impressive amount of weight since his last visit. After taking his temperature, she re-taped his diaper loosely. Tony was glad that Jake didn't explode when she removed the thermometer like he had at their previous visit.

John swooped in a few minutes later. "Ah, Tony, Ziva! How is everything?" He asked.

Jake immediately turned his head towards the new voice in the room which John took note of. He took the file from the nurse and studied it for several moments.

"I guess I don't need to ask how he's eating." He laughed, noting the weight he'd put on. "He's gained almost a pound since he was last here."

Ziva smiled. "He does love to eat."

John nodded. "That's a good thing. Have you noticed him feeding longer than before?"

She nodded. "He nurses longer than he used to, but feeding time is farther apart."

John nodded. "Good. That's what he should be doing. Within the next few weeks, he may go about four hours between feedings, but nurse at longer intervals. That's completely normal. As long as he had wet diapers everything is good."

He wiped the end of his stethoscope with an alcohol swap. "Okay, let's take a listen here."

He listened to the baby's heart and then his breath sounds. "Perfect. I don't heart any wheezing or congestion. It's allergy season so keep an eye out for any runny nose or eyes, sneezing or coughing."

John continued his exam and couldn't help but smile as the baby's eyes followed his movements. "He's very alert, and has wonderful head movement." Almost on cue, Jake attempted to lift his head slightly off the blanket. "That's what I want to see!" John said with another smile.

Jake gave up and turned his face to Tony. "Show off." Tony muttered. Jake smiled in response causing all the adults to laugh.

John opened his diaper. "Now remember Jake, we're all friends here." He said jokingly as he opened the diaper.

Of course, the moment the cool room hit Jake's bare skin he began to pee. John was quicker though and able to get the diaper back in place. "You two have a little pickle on your hands, I can tell you that." He said laughing.

Ziva looked confused and glanced at Tony. "A joker." He explained.

When it was safe again, John dropped his diaper and examined him. "Mommy, hand me your baby wipes."

Ziva grabbed the travel sized pack out of Jake's diaper bag along with a clean diaper and handed them to the doctor. He didn't clean him up however; he nodded to the nurse who disappeared out the door.

"Well, your son is absolutely thriving." He announced.

Ziva visibly relaxed. John took note. He looked at the door that was still closed. His voice dropped.

"Look Ziva, I don't know much about you or your past. But, I do know that you've been a patient of my wife's for a long time." He let the words sink in. "She has mentioned your name many, many times. But of course can't go into any details. You seem apprehensive when you're here with the baby. I just want to tell you… you don't have to worry. He's is doing wonderfully. You're doing a very good job being a Mother to him."

Her eyes became glassy but she smiled. "Thank you. But I have a wonderful support system." She placed a hand on Tony's chest who in turn wrapped his arm around her.

John smiled. "And it shows. This is one happy little boy who has a wonderful life ahead of him. That's because of the two of you, no one else." As if to show his agreement, Jake looked up at Ziva and smiled.

The nurse then came back into the room and Tony winced. She was carrying a vial, and a small capped syringe.

"And now I'm about to make him unhappy. He's just getting one today. I'm going to suggest something to you. It's completely your choice, but I always suggest it. Getting a shot is traumatic for a baby. Today he's getting the second part of series he started at the hospital. When mothers are breastfeeding, there's nothing more comforting in the world to an infant. I always suggest that women try to nurse right after the shot. It has a much more calming effect.

Ziva at first looked apprehensive. She looked down at the baby and caught his small eyes staring up at her. If it would help Jake get through it, then she would find a way too. She looked at John and nodded. He smiled and nodded, walking to the other side of the room and retrieving a stool. He moved it up to Ziva and gestured for her to sit in it.

Tony stood behind her to support her back. John used the baby wipes and cleaned the baby up and putting the clean diaper on him. Using an alcohol wipe, he swabbed the area before pulling the liquid into the syringe. Ziva reached into the diaper bag and pulled out a nursing blanket, using it to cover her right shoulder before she began unbuttoning her blouse beneath it.

By the time John was ready to administer the shot, Ziva was ready as well. Tony cringed as he saw the sharp object getting closer to his son. He diverted his eyes but knew the instant the needle had pierced Jake's skin.

He shrieked. It was a sound neither Tony nor Ziva had ever heard come from Jake. Tony turned his eyes back in enough time to see John hand the now empty syringe to the nurse who disposed of it into a bucket on the wall. In the meantime, John had the screaming baby wrapped in his diaper and blanket and was passing him off to Ziva.

She looked crestfallen as she took the baby. She opened his blanket so he could feel her bare skin on his belly as she moved him to her breast still covered by the nursing blanket. At first, Jake wanted nothing to do with it, but once he realized what it was, he latched on and began to suck intermittently. His screaming stopped instantly having dissolved into a small case of whimpers. He was more interested in the milk flowing into his mouth.

John smiled. "Good job Mom. Take all the time you need. I'll be back in a few minutes."

He and the nurse exited the room leaving them alone with the baby.

"Wow. I was reading online about people who give their babies Tylenol or Motrin before their shots."

Ziva nodded. "I read it in a book too. He seems okay with this though, yes?"

Jake's grunts as he sped up his drinking was the answer they needed. She lifted the blanket and smiled. "We are doing a good job Tony."

He smiled. "Of course we are."

Jake had been nursing for about ten minutes when John returned. He knocked, then stuck his head in the door and laughed. He closed the door behind him. "Well, I see he's over that traumatic event. The last thing I want to talk to you about is his sleeping. He's alert enough now to start giving you signals when he's tired. If you see him rubbing his eyes, or pulling at his ears, that's a sign that he's ready to sleep. If you're nursing him or rocking him to sleep try to break that pattern. It's better to break the habit now than later."

Ziva nodded. "I understand." Jake was about finished his mid-morning meal so Ziva broke his hold on her breast and passed him to Tony. As she fixed her clothing underneath the blanket Tony expertly burped Jake careful not to touch the area where he'd gotten his shot.

Once she was put back together, she folded the blanket up and placed it back in the diaper bag. Jake had already burped twice, partially from the air he's swallowed when he was screaming. They both shook John's hand and thanked him for his care.

He shook his head. "That's what we're here for. He may be a little groggy or cranky for the next 24 hours or so. That's normal. Keep an eye on him. If anything seems to be getting too bad call me day or night."

They nodded and again said their "Thanks" before heading off for a late breakfast, hoping that John's warning about the baby being cranky was just that…. Simply a warning.

To Be Continued


	74. Chapter 74

**It's funny that always-date-a-coworker asked about Tony Sr. That gets addressed slightly in this chapter. More so later down the road.**

**Again, thanks for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 74**

Jake had managed to doze off by the time they'd reached the diner they were heading to. Tony and Ziva were both starving and looking forward to the opportunity to have a family outing in public.

They were led to a booth near the windows that would allow them enough room for the baby. Jake was oblivious to the fact that they had arrived anywhere. He cuddled his small face deeper into the side of his carrier, pulling his fists up as if he was warning everyone not to disturb him.

The smiling waitress had brought menus and gushed over a baby for a few moments before disappearing to put their orders in. Tony reached across the table and took her hand in his, playing with the ring on her finger. "There's- there's something I want to talk to you about." He started.

He looked serious which concerned her considering the good morning they had been having. They took turns playing with each other's hands.

"What?"" She asked quietly.

"About what happened at the doctor's office."

Her mind replayed the earlier events not catching his meaning. "I do not understand."

He sighed. "At the reception desk. You were immediately going to step forward and pay for his visit."

She thought back to the exchange and didn't understand what was bothering him. "Yes, I…. I did not think it would bother you."

He inhaled deeply before responding. "I… I didn't think it would either. But it is."

She massaged his hand with her fingers. "Tell me."

"I… I just thought that everything would fall into place a lot easier." He shook his head, indicating to her that he was struggling to find the right words. "That's not what I mean. I just-" He stopped again.

She thought for a moment. "You thought that we would not have to make little decisions like we were faced with… little things like who is going to pay for the doctor visit or whose turn is it to buy diapers?"

He let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Yes. I don't know… it just make me feel strange."

"Well Tony… our situation is strange. Our relationship has never been normal. We are not the typical family." She lowered her face slightly so she could look into his eyes. "That does not make us any less of a family than anyone else."

He nodded. "I know… I just-" He thought for a moment. "I think we should combine our bank accounts." He announced.

She pulled her hand away and sat back, staring into his face. Before she could reply the waitress appeared with their coffee and orange juice. They thanked her with a nod and a smile.

"Why?" She asked which surprised Tony. Judging her reaction, he'd expected an immediate refusal.

"It would be easier. If Jimmy and Breena sublet my apartment that'll free up a lot of money for us. We're going to be living together, sharing expenses, sharing our lives…. We wouldn't have to worry about who is paying for what because it would be all one account."

"Tony, you do realize that I make considerably less money than you. I do not have the same amount of years you do-"

He reached across the table and silenced her with a finger on her lips. "The money doesn't matter to me Ziva. It's just money. I've seen what it can do to people…. What it did to my parents. I won't let that happen to us." He had a conviction in his voice that she'd rarely been witness to.

"Okay." She agreed simply.

He almost choked on the juice he'd just sipped. "Okay?"

She smiled and nodded. "Okay. But you do know what this means?"

He returned her smile. "What?"

"That now we have to agree on what movies get added to your DVD collection." She teased.

His face dropped. "Hmmm…. You know what maybe this isn't such a good idea." He said in a teasing manner. She reached out to smack his arm lightly, but before she made contact he'd grabbed her left hand and began sliding her ring off of her finger.

"As a matter of fact, let me take this back-" She was laughing and trying to keep the ring on her finger. He'd still managed to remove it slip it into his pocket. "I'm going to eat, and duck out before the check comes." He told her, joining her in her infectious laughter.

"You are forgetting Tony, I know where you work." She warned him with a smile.

"Ah, yeah, so you do. Darn."

He smiled even wider when she held her left hand out; fingers outstretched. He reached into his pocket and pulled out her ring. Using his softest touch he slid it back onto her finger where it belonged.

Their eyes locked and they were lost, his fingers again playing with her ring. They were unsure how long they had stayed like that… nor did they care. It was the sound of someone clearing their throat that caused them both to jump and remember their surroundings.

"Sorry." The waitress apologized. She was standing above them with four plates balanced on her arms. They jumped back and allowed her to place their food in front of them.

"Southwestern omelet with sides of bacon and link sausage, white toast." She repeated, placing one large and one small plate in front of Tony.

"And, an egg white omelet with extra veggies, no cheese. Turkey bacon and whole wheat toast." She repeated placing Ziva's order in front of her.

Tony wrinkled his nose. They thanked the waitress and immediately dug into their food. "I am so hungry." Ziva said between mouthfuls.

He swallowed and smiled. "No wonder. You eat like a bird." He teased.

She glared at him. "I have to eat good Tony. Everything I eat he eats." She said gesturing towards the baby. She was surprised to see that Jake's eyes were open and staring at her. "Hey you. How long have you been awake?"

Tony smiled. "He smelled food." Jake turned his head towards Daddy. "So what do you think Jake? Do you want what Mommy has or what Daddy has?"

The babies eyes immediately sought out his Mommy again. Ziva laughed so loud she almost snorted. "Sorry Tony. It looks like I win this one."

Tony leaned closer to the baby and whispered. "It's okay little man. I like Mommy's breasts too."

Although he'd said it extremely low, Ziva heard him enough to blush crimson. Tony smiled which caused Jake to smile as well.

Ziva leaned down to the baby as well. "And if Daddy does not behave, he will not be seeing them for a long, long, LONG time" She told Jake, who again smiled. He loved being in the middle of their conversation.

Tony sat up straight and crossed his hands in front of him. Ziva laughed and picked her fork back up, stealing a piece of Tony's sausage off of his plate.

Tony glowered at her teasingly, but chose not to say anything just in case she made good on her threat. Keeping a close eye on the baby, Tony resumed eating.

That was when he felt it. Ziva had kicked off one of her shoes and was running her bare foot up the inside of his leg under the table. Tony squirmed in the booth causing the plastic cover to let loose an odd sound.

There was her foot again, now running up past his knee. "Now who isn't behaving herself?" He croaked out. 'Damn her and her long legs.'

She smiled sweetly biting into her toast. "Are you not enjoying yourself Tony?"

He chuckled. "I didn't say that. As a matter of fact-" BANG!

He jumped banging his knee on the table. The baby startled and immediately began to cry.

Ziva stood and picked the baby up, a guilty smile on her face. Tony pointed at her. "That is your fault."

"I did not bang my knee on the table Tony." She had Jake on her shoulder which had settled him immediately. He cuddled his face into her neck, grabbing onto her hair.

"I only banged my knee on the table because you were massaging my crotch with your foot!" He protested softly, freezing when he saw the waitress standing at the end of the table. Her face had turned three shades of red within seconds.

"Uh-Hi…" Tony said, ready for the Earth to open and swallow him.

"I uh… I just wanted to check and make sure everything was okay…" She stammered.

Ziva smiled sweetly. "Everything is perfect. Thank you."

The girl disappeared, probably not to be seen again.

Ziva chuckled. Tony finished his plate, leaving only his toast to munch on. "You are truly a sinister woman David." He told her.

She smiled innocently. "You just wait Tony." She promised.

Tony took the baby to let Ziva finish her meal. She'd just finished her last bite when a familiar smell came over the table.

"Ugh. Jake… you didn't have eggs. Why do you smell like that?" Tony asked the baby whose bright eyes were twinkling. Ziva laughed and grabbed his diaper bag, standing up and taking the baby from Tony.

"We'll be right back." She said, disappearing into the ladies room.

Tony sat back in the booth and absorbed everything that had happened today. He felt amazing. Invigorated. Revitalized. He suddenly felt sad for his Father. Senior had no idea what a family was supposed to feel like… how incredibly satisfying it was just to sit and have a meal with the woman you love and your son.

Senior hadn't even bothered to return the voice mail he'd left. His loss. Jake had Rivka, and he had Gibbs. And truth be told, he had Eli. Tony didn't think much of the man but he believed deep down that if Ziva had called a left a voicemail, Eli would have returned it.

Ziva returned a few minutes later with a much better smelling baby. The waitress worked up the nerve to reappear asking if they needed anything else. They confirmed just the check. This made the young woman very happy as she disappeared to tally their bill.

"Be right back." Tony said and stood. Ziva was strapping Jake back into his carrier.

"Skipping out on us Tony?" Ziva teased.

He smiled and leaned down until he was even with her face. "Never." He whispered, kissing her passionately and not caring who saw them.

He strolled away, grinning at the again red faced waitress who was just returning to their table. An older man working the counter caught Tony's eye and smiled, nodding to him in appreciation.

'Eat your heart out gentlemen.' Tony thought as he strolled proudly towards the men's room.

The waitress had started clearing some of their dishes when Jake turned and looked at her.

"Hello there little one." She greeted, leaning closer to the baby. Jake batted his eyelashes and smiled.

"Oh, he's beautiful." She told Ziva.

She smiled. "Thank you."

"You look just like your Daddy, don't you? Huh?" She sing-songed at Jake.

Ziva's smile dropped. The waitress was oblivious. Ziva reached towards the baby and straightened his clothing slightly. "Do you really think so?" She asked the girl.

"Oh absolutely. That smile, and those cheekbones. Even the shape of his eyes. He's the spitting image." She disappeared with an armful of dishes.

Tony returned a few moments later finding a shell shocked Ziva. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Ziva blinked several times as if she just realized he had returned. "What? Oh nothing. Just thinking."

"About me?" Tony asked hopefully.

She smiled. "Of course." She answered truthfully.

"Well, where are we off to now?" He asked.

"Well, since we're so close… why don't we stop by the bank and the store. We use the same bank so that should not take long. And we are running low on supplies."

Tony smiled. He glanced at the check and left the poor waitress a double tip. Picking up the baby he held his arm out. "Lead the way my lady."

To be continued


	75. Chapter 75

**Just a short little filler chapter. More will be posted later.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 75**

Tony gripped the steering wheel tighter as he glanced over at Ziva. She's been acting strange ever since he'd gone to the restroom at the diner.

She'd strapped Jake into his car seat, taking extra time to stare at his face, rubbing her fingers gently down his cheeks as if she was trying to remember every aspect of his features.

She now sat silently staring out the window, ignoring Tony's attempts at conversation. He began to worry that she was having a change of heart about their plans to combine their finances. Maybe she was finding it too permanent. Maybe they were moving too fast.

He angled into a parking spot and cut the engine. Ziva continued staring out the window.

"Hey." He said softly, reaching out to touch her arm.

She turned and looked at him. "We're here." He told her.

She looked out the front window and nodded as if just realizing they'd arrived. "Okay." She said simply, reaching down and unhooking her seatbelt.

Tony didn't move which drew her attention. "Are you okay?" He asked her.

She nodded. "Yes. Why would I not be okay?" She asked vaguely.

He began to feel angry. "Oh, I don't know Ziva. You've been acting like a zombie since we left the diner. Did I do something wrong?"

She looked at him strangely. "No."

Her simple answer was it. He tightened his hands on the steering wheel and sighed. "You're lying to me."

She looked guilty but shook her head. "I am not. Tony, I am just tired." She realized he was angry. He knew her too well. He knew something was on her mind, but she couldn't mention it to him. She couldn't live with herself getting his hopes up and seeing them dashed.

All of the familiar expressions and looks she saw in Jacob had suddenly clicked into place at the diner. People had commented before about Jake having 'an expression like Tony'. Ziva had seen it herself on many occasions. But she had convinced herself that Jake was learning his facial expressions from Tony.

But her Mother had started to say something about Jake looking like someone, but stopped herself. And today, the waitress was convinced Jake looked like Tony.

It wasn't possible, Ziva knew that. She remembered the pictures of the donors she and Josh had looked at. They all had dark hair, skin and eyes just like they did.

Yet, Jacob had fair skin. She wouldn't call his complexion light, but it certainly wouldn't be considered "olive" as it should have been. Also, his hair had started out dark like hers and the donors. But now, it had started to lighten to the point where it was lighter than Tony's.

Could Josh have done the unthinkable? Could he have lied to her and used Tony's sperm?

No, how would he have ever know?. She never told Josh about Tony donating many years ago. It was in her imagination. Or even wishful thinking.

But now the seed of doubt had been planted. No matter how much she tried to talk herself out of it, her mind kept screaming back with "What ifs-".

She couldn't tell Tony, not yet. If he ever thought there was a slight chance he was Jacob's biological father he would be elated. She couldn't be the one to give him that hope and then see him crushed when it turned out not to be true.

He was staring at her with irritation in his eyes. She forced a fake smile but immediately dropped it when he continued to stare at her.

"What?" She asked.

He sighed. "You want me to be open and honest with you about everything. But you-"

She cut him off. "Tony really? Are we going to do this here?" She was clearly irritated, mostly because he was right. She was keeping something from him. But, having him angry at her was better than her witnessing his utter devastation.

He snatched the keys out of the ignition and sat back in his seat. "Is it this? Do you not want to go through with this?" He gestured towards the bank.

"I told you I was okay with it. Why are you questioning me now?"

He growled and unhooked his belt, throwing the door open and exiting the vehicle. She climbed out and opened the back door. Tony had pulled the stroller out and unfolded it, wheeling it over to her.

She'd lifted Jake out and began placing him in the stroller. Tony reached down to help her but she batted his hands away. "I have got it." She said angrily.

He led the way into the bank, holding the door open while she angled the stroller through. They were led to a desk where a teller immediately began cooing over the baby. Jake, apparently being a natural born flirt, batted his long lashes at her and smiled.

The woman looked at Tony. "Oh, he looks just like you!"

Tony smiled politely. Ziva sighed deeply.

* * *

They didn't do much better on their trip to the store. Ziva was still lost in thought, Tony angry at her for bottling up whatever it was she was thinking about. They'd no sooner entered the doors to the market when Jake, probably picking up on his parent's mood, decided to cry. That lasted almost all the way through the store before Ziva scooped him up and went out to the car with him. Tony finished up the shopping; hoping he'd grabbed everything and rushed out.

Ziva had just finished breastfeeding him in the backseat. With a full belly, Jake seemed to have forgotten what it was that made him so angry in the store. Tony loaded the groceries into the car and walked the cart to the cart return. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Ziva snap her seatbelt on in the backseat. His anger flashed over him again causing him to slam the car door which started Jake in a crying fit again.

"Nice Tony." Ziva snapped.

He sighed. "Well you're back there. At least he's not alone." He snapped back.

He saw her glaring at him through the rearview mirror. "Tony, I am sitting back here because he spit up while he was eating. If he spits up again I want to be here."

He immediately regretted his tone. He started the car but before backing out of the parking spot he turned to her. "Look Ziva, I-"

"Just drive." She interrupted, turning her face away.

He grabbed the gear shift, threw the truck in reverse and began their journey home.

It was going to be a long night.

To Be Continued


	76. Chapter 76

**And here's some more to make up for the short chapter earlier.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 76**

It was a good thing Ziva rode in the backseat with Jake. By the time they'd reached home, he'd spit up again in between his cries.

Tony's anger at Ziva melted away to absolute guilt. He was the one that slammed the car door scaring the baby. Jake wasn't used to hearing loud sounds and bangs. Ziva's apartment was generally quiet. The television was rarely on.

'Huh.' Tony thought as he turned into the parking lot. 'I haven't watched a movie in weeks.' He's been too busy playing house with Ziva. His heart clenched at the thought of suddenly not having Ziva and Jake in his life. He could not… would not allow that to happen.

He turned off the engine and turned quietly. "How is he?" He asked softly.

Ziva looked at him. She wasn't angry or guilty. As a matter of fact she'd pulled her 'emotion blocking' mask into place.

"He fell asleep." She answered softly.

Tony nodded and exited the vehicle as quietly as he could. Ziva beat him to the passenger side and already had the baby out of the car. Tony grabbed his stroller and left it for her while he grabbed the groceries.

There were too many for him to take in one trip. Ziva rolled the sleeping baby over and grabbed a few bags, tucking them into the bottom of the stroller and hooking them onto the handles.

They went upstairs wordlessly nodding politely to neighbors they passed. Once inside the safe confines of their apartment, Ziva gently lifted the baby and took him into his nursery, changing his clothes and laying him in his crib.

She laid her arm on the rail of the crib as she stared down at the baby. 'Oh Jake… can you be more of a miracle than I thought?' She thought to herself.

"Is he okay?" Tony's whispered voice came from behind her.

She nodded. "He does not feel warm. I think he was just crying too much."

He placed the two packages of diapers he was carrying in under the changing table. He wanted to say something more to her… needed to say something more. But, he had no idea what to say.

She continued to stare down at the baby almost as if she was afraid he'd suddenly disappear. He sighed and exited the room, walking back to the kitchen.

As he continued to put the groceries away, Ziva joined him and wordlessly began to help. There was only one bag left and Ziva was already halfway through with it so Tony retired to the living room. He sat and stared down at his hands, turning only once when Ziva reached into her purse and pulled out their new paperwork and starter checks from the bank.

"Ziva?"

She turned to him.

"Promise me you'll never take him away from me."

She swept across the room almost as if she was on air and was in front of him immediately. She took his face into her hands and raised his eyes to meet hers. "Why would you ever think that?"

"I just…. I need to hear you say it. Please, promise me." He begged as his eyes became glassy.

She dropped to her knees in front of him. "Tony, I would never… ever… take Jacob away from you."

"Even if this-"He gestured around the room "-doesn't work out?"

"Do you mean you and me?" She asked.

He nodded. She shook her head. "That is not an option."

Tony shook his head. "I… I've thought that before. It's always ended badly… I can't-"

She silenced him with a kiss to his forehead. "Tony… there is one thing I have learned about you and I." When he didn't questions what that was, she continued. "We stopped being Tony DiNozzo and Ziva David a long, long time ago… even before I was in Somalia."

He looked at her strangely which caused her to smile slightly. "What I mean is that you and I became a part of each other, whether we wanted to admit it or not. We are no good when we are apart. Back when you were still undercover for Jenny… if I went the weekend without talking to you, I realized I missed you. When I am in the field with anyone but you I do not feel as safe as I do with you watching my back. Sometimes I feel like we breathe the same air, our hearts beat in the same rhythm. When you are close to me I feel your presence so strongly it makes me lightheaded. We can never be apart Tony. I would not be able to function as a person without you."

Tony touched her cheek gently. "You would be fine."

She shook her head. "No, I would not. After you rescued me from Somalia… I was here and healing physically. But, I could not even begin to heal emotionally until I knew you would not push me away. Amie tried to reach out to me, but I refused. There was this huge gaping chasm in my soul and I could not even think about healing until I knew you had forgiven me."

A thought suddenly crossed Tony's mind. "Ziva-"

Tears rolled down Ziva's face. "I was terrified to talk to you. I had talked to everyone except you… if you had rejected me-"

He grabbed her and pulled her tight. "Don't say it, please-"

"I would have Tony." She mumbled into his chest.

"I told you Ziva… sitting there tied to that damned dirty chair with those drugs coursing through my veins. I told you that I couldn't live without you. Why would you think I would reject you? "

She pulled away and looked deep into his eyes. "I did not think I deserved you. Not only had I lied to you, accused you, pulled my gun on you… there you were on some crazy mission to save me. I was dirty, tainted, I did not think I was worthy of the effort you put into my rescue."

"Ziva you were abused-"

"I can admit to it now Tony. I was raped, physically and sexually assaulted by whatever means Saleem's men could think of… I was broken. He broke me. But I still only thought of you… and how I hoped you were happy."

"Why would you think you committing suicide after we rescued you would make me happy? "

She shook her head. "I thought you rescued me out of a sense of duty. But in the squad room when I came in to meet Director Vance… when our eyes met I knew there was a chance… I could feel your soul reaching out to me."

He pulled her tight again. "I finally felt whole again after so many months of being broken. My God we wasted so much time."

She smiled and pulled away again. "We'll just have to make up for it now. " She reached out and touched the side of his face. "I am sorry for today Tony. I am sorry for being so bitchy."

He took her arms gently. "Come here." He motioned her onto his lap. She sat and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"You weren't bitchy. You just worried me. You shut down on me." He whispered as he kissed the side of her head.

Guilt wracked her again. "I am sorry." She took a deep breath, sealing her heart for what she knew was coming. "Back at the diner, the waitress said something about Jake… it sort of threw me off balance."

He looked at her. "What did she say?"

Ziva sighed. "She was going on and on about how much Jake looks like you-"She stopped a took a deep breath.

Tony smiled. "People say it all the time Ziva. They're just being polite. "

She shook her head. "Yes but-"He interrupted her by capturing her lips and taking her breath away.

They finally broke apart and Ziva leaned her head on Tony's forehead.

"Ziva, I've told you that it doesn't matter."

"Yes but-"She began to explain.

"No, there's no but about it"

"But if he did, wouldn't you want to know?" She asked suddenly causing Tony to pause.

"I… I don't think I can love him anymore than I do now. I don't care that Jake doesn't look like me or have my blood running through his veins. It doesn't make me love him any less."

"You… you don't think he looks like you?" She asked in a small voice.

Tony shook his head. "Not really. People say he does to be polite. What are they supposed to say? 'Dude, you kid doesn't look a thing like you'?" He said in a made up voice.

'Maybe he is right. Maybe I am imagining things.' She thought to herself.

Tony continued. "I mean sometimes I think to myself that if you and I had worked this out a long time ago, Jake would be mine. But it doesn't matter."

She smiled. "He is yours in every way that counts." She told him. "And no matter what, that will never change. I promise you that Tony."

He kissed her long and hard pouring every promise in his soul into her. She returned the gesture whole heartedly, not bothering to break apart until they began to feel light headed.

He was panting slightly. "Just think, a week from now, we might be having make up sex." He teased her.

She chuckled. "I would just settle for any type of sex at this point." She told him.

"REEEaaaalllly?" He teased.

She nodded and bit her bottom lip shyly. She leaned towards his ear and whispered. "I cannot wait to feel you mouth all over me Tony."

He smiled and shifted his position on the couch. She wasn't done with him yet.

"I cannot wait to feel you buried deep inside of me… my nails running down your back as you push into me over and over."

He moved again. He grabbed her suddenly, throwing her down onto the couch and climbing on top of her.

He kissed her as he hand slid under her shirt and traced her ribcage. His fingers barely brushed the underside of her breasts causing her to squirm.

"You are a tease Ziva David."

She laughed and squirmed again as his hands brushed against her. She took hold of one of his hands and placed it on her breast.

He captured her lips while he gently caressed her breast. "When the time is right Ziva… I am going to make you scream." He whispered before capturing them again.

She moaned into his mouth and ran her hands down his back. "Tony-"She whispered breathlessly.

"Yes?" He asked, staring into her eyes, loving the reflection he saw of himself in them.

"This rule of yours… no playing until Amie gives me the okay…." She ran her hands over his rear and squeezed gently, pushing his body deeper into hers. "It sucks!" She swore in frustration.

He grunted as he felt her heat radiating through their clothes. "Yeah… I uh… I'm having second thoughts on that myself-"He mumbled.

She smiled when she felt his body really beginning to react to her. She kissed him again, pouring everything into it before separating. "Sooooo… we can play?" She asked hopefully.

He nodded with a goofy smile. She pushed him off of her and to his feet. He grabbed her by the hands and pulled her up. Still holding onto him, she walked backwards towards the hallway, leading him to the bedroom.

The phone rang. They both froze in their steps. She threw her head back and cursed silently in Hebrew.

"I'll get the phone, you go get ready." Tony told her. She smiled and nodded, disappearing down the hallway.

"Hello?" Tony practically choked out as he grabbed the telephone.

"Tony? Hi, it's Rivka."

He straightened up suddenly, almost in fear that Rivka would know what he was about to do to her daughter.

"Uh, Hi. How are you?"

"Good. I was just wondering, is Ziva available?"

"Yeah, hold on just a minute."

He walked down the hallway and into the bedroom almost fumbling the phone onto the floor.

Ziva had been busy in the few seconds they're been apart. She was lying on her side on the bed, completely naked and smiling at him.

"Uh.. oh… uh, here she is." He said into the receiver.

"Tony?" Came the voice from the other end.

"Why are you talking in such a high pitch voice?"

He laughed nervously and handed the phone to Ziva. "It's your mother." He whispered.

She smiled and moved to lie on her back. "Hello Mama." She said.

Rivka chuckled. "Ziva, what are you doing to that boy? He sounded like he was ready to sing soprano at the opera."

Ziva laughed. "Just enjoying Jake taking a nap."

Rivka smiled. "Ah, then I won't keep you. I was wondering if you were free for lunch tomorrow?"

Ziva thought for a moment. "Yes. Tony had an appointment so Jake and I will be here alone. I could cook for you, yes?"

"No no honey. I will bring food with me. 1230 sound okay?" Rivka asked hopefully.

"Perfect… I… I really need to talk to you about some things." Ziva said in a small voice.

Rivka smiled. "I am happy to hear that Tateleh. I look forward to it."

Ziva smiled. "Me too."

"Shalom Ziva."

"Shalom Mama."

Ziva hit the end button on the phone and turned her attention to Tony. He had his shirt off but was still wearing his jeans. "Off!" She ordered pointing at the offending clothes.

"Hey, I thought we were supposed to be playing. You're getting awfully bossy."

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you going to take your jump rope and go home Tony?"

He smiled as he slid his jeans and boxers off his legs. "Not a chance."

Ziva threw the phone across the room with a loud thunk on the carpeting. "Good, now come here."

He happily obliged.

To Be Continued


	77. Chapter 77

**Wow, this story hit 1,000 reviews as I was working on this chapter. That means that it has moved people on at least 1,000 occasions to leave a comment. This response is just so overwhelming… I cannot thank all of you enough.**

**I wanted to get a lot of writing done this weekend but it just wasn't in the cards. I wasn't feeling too well and it was hard just getting this chapter finished. Hopefully I'll get a chance later in the week.**

**Again, please remember that this story is rated "M" for a reason. If you are offended or not old enough, please proceed to the nearest emergency exit.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 77**

Tony stood in front of the bathroom mirror and smiled at his reflection. His body was still humming from their 'festivities'.

To be on the safe side, he'd kept his jeans on the entire time, a painful reminder that they could only go so far. That plan had sort of backfired when he was on his knees and had Ziva sprawled at the edge of the bed. His mouth was working her slowly, and the more she moaned and writhed under his ministrations the more painful his master plan had become.

He knew she was nearing her peak. Her hips were slowly rocking into his mouth and breathing was ragged. Tony couldn't stand the pain anymore and reached down to undo his jeans, never once taking his lips and tongue off of her.

Just as he provided a small amount of relief by opening his jeans, she yelled his name and shot up off the bed.

His body couldn't take it. Thank God he was already on his knees because he came just from watching her. And embarrassingly enough, he had to go into the bathroom and clean himself up.

She smiled loving the fact that she could drive him that crazy. Ziva had become the ultimate tease… so close yet so far away. And she enjoyed driving him crazy… she knew what power she had over him.

He glanced in the mirror again and smiled. Since he didn't bring any clothes in here to change into maybe it was time he did a little teasing of his own.

Hanging the towel back on the rack, he slowly opened the door. "Ohhh Ziva-"He said with a sing song voice, convinced that two could play this game and now it was his turn.

"Oh shit." He moaned as he stepped out. Ziva was leaning against the headboard. Her head was back against the intricately designed wood. Her legs pulled to her stomach and she was touching herself where his mouth had been just minutes before.

His body had begun to stir at the mere sight. She'd heard him enter however and stopped, opening her eyes and smiling at him.

"You're trying to kill me." He said softly.

She shook her head but continued to smile. "Come here."

Tony started to go towards the drawer in her dresser that had become his. "No. Come here." She ordered.

He smiled at her noticing that she hadn't moved an inch although her hands were now still. He walked across the room in all his glory, climbing next to her in bed. He turned on his side with his head resting on his hand.

"You are so amazing." He whispered as he stared into his eyes.

She laughed lightly. "Why? Because of this?"

"No, not just because of..." He stopped as he noted how her face had suddenly turned serious. "What are you thinking?" He asked her.

She shrugged, dropping her legs down to the bed and crossing them at her ankles. "I… I used to take matters into my own hands from time to time before Saleem. Afterwards… I was afraid to."

He listened intently. "Even… on your own?" He asked gently.

She nodded. "There was one occasion when Saleem-"She stopped and stared down at her hands. He reached out and stroked her arm gently. She turned on her side to face him and touched his cheek. "I thought for sure that Saleem was going to rape me. They had my hands tied and he had ordered his men to hold my legs open. I had been there for a few weeks, I felt so weak. I still tried to fight but-"

Bile rose in his throat as his stomach began to churn. He swallowed it down and instead leaned forward to kiss her on the forehead.

It was a simple gesture that gave her all the courage and support she needed. "He dropped to his knees between my legs and spit on me… there-"She gestured to the juncture between her legs. "He.. He used his fingers and began rubbing me… over and over. He would jam his fingers deep inside of me… he was asking me questions over and over… demanding answers that I could not give him."

Tears began running down her cheeks. Tony let her cry. "He- he knew I could not answer. They had a gag tied tightly over my mouth. I could not speak a word. It was another form of torture. I… I did not want it to, but dammit my body started reacting."

He touched her cheek. "Oh baby-"He started. She shook her head and wiped at her tears.

"Even my own body betrayed me. He kept it up over and over until I orgasmed. He and his men laughed so hard… they called me a dirty bitch… a slut who enjoyed everything they did to me. I felt so sick that I threw up and started choking because of the gag. I panicked and rolled over trying to clear my throat. He… he accused me of begging for more and raped me with his riding crop. It hurt so bad as he rammed it in me over and over. I hated myself for not laying there and choking to death.. just so it would be over."

"Baby it wasn't your fault." He consoled, wiping the remaining tears from her cheeks.

She smiled softly. "I know. Amie… explained it all to me." Tony looked at her strangely. "The anatomy... what makes that area do what it does." She smiled shyly which was a stark contrast to their nudity.

"What?" He asked smiling back.

She shook her head. "I am talking about it like I am fourteen years old and just discovered it." She laughed lightly.

He smiled broadly. "Well, I happen to be a big fan of it… that area…." He joked causing her to slap his arm slightly.

"I could tell earlier. "She smirked. Her smile faded again slightly. "Amie also explained to me the psychology of what Saleem had done. I just… I did not want to feel that.. feeling… again for a very long time. "

"Feeling? Oh, you mean an orgasm?"

She nodded and smiled. "Yes. I was so disgusted with myself. I did not ever want to experience it again."

"What changed your mind?"

She smiled and leaned forward to kiss him, pushing him onto his back and sliding herself on top until she was straddling him.

"You did. In Paris." She said before capturing his lips again.

"I was a perfect gentleman in Paris!" He protested with a smile on his face.

She smiled down at him. "Yes you were. It was just…. you. Being you. The bed we shared was so small." She leaned down and kissed him again taking time to drag her lips over his chin and cheek before stopping just below his ear. She inhaled deeply before whispering. "I could smell you… so close to me. It was overwhelming. You dreamed of me that morning… you moaned my name and smiled… you even touched yourself in your sleep." Her hand gently brushed his no longer flaccid member. "I just… I could not take it. I became wet just lying next to you….."

She brushed her hand on him again causing him to hiss. He reached his hand out quickly and snatched her hands away. "In the shower… you told me before…"

She smiled but didn't struggle against him holding her hands. "It was more than just a physical release. It was a mental one as well." She pulled her hands away slightly, only when he let go she joined their hands together. "You gave me that and I could not even share it with you."

"I'm glad you're sharing it with me now." He replied softly.

She smiled. "Me too. And I will admit, I have had some strange conversations in my life… none was stranger than me telling Amie about it and her reply being 'I'm so proud that you masturbated!'" They both laughed loudly at that, Tony completely hearing that conversation in his head.

He continued his grip on her one hand but released the other. He reached up and tousled her hair. "Show me." He said softly.

She looked at him strangely. "What?"

"I want you to show me." He said again.

She looked unsure at first but then nodded. She slid onto the bed next to him, sitting on her knees. "Sit up." She ordered him.

Tony sat up and resumed her earlier position against the headboard. She tapped his knees, indicating for him to separate his legs. He did and she crawled between and turned, laying against his back and taking his hands again.

He sat still for a period of time just playing with his fingers. Tony wondered if she was waging an inner battle with herself. Finally, she brought his hands up to her mouth and kissed both of them before letting go.

She reached back and wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him down. She turned and captured his lips with hers before using her right hand to trace the stubble along his cheek. He took her hands in his and brought her fingers to his lips. He gently suckled them, working them with his mouth as he did her core earlier.

Her body twitched slightly causing her to smile. Convinced her fingers were wet enough she turned back to lay her head on his chest again. She reached behind Tony's knees and tugged gently, indicating that she wanting him to bend them.

He did. She in turned brought her legs up and draped them over his, opening herself up freely. She wet her fingers one more time just to be sure and reached down, gently brushing them over her clit.

A few strokes later and Tony could feel her skin warming against his. She moaned quietly to herself as he fingers continued their circular rotation. Her eyes slid closed as she allowed her head to fall to rest on his chest.

He watched, fascinated by her body's reaction as she continued her ministrations. Her cheeks were flushed as a thin sheen of sweat broke across her brow. Tony's erection was rock hard and pressing against her back. He licked his lips in hunger as his eyes locked onto her erect nipples that seemed to be screaming for his attention.

Her body shuddered against him, but still she kept going. She began moaning low in her throat again, this time because she had changed tactics. She was using her pointer finger to tease.

Tony felt as if every nerve ending in his body was on fire. He fought the impulse to thrust his hips at her, especially considering he was behind her. He definitely didn't want to freak her out.

"Tony-"She moaned, half in a whisper, half out loud.

"I'm right here baby." He whispered, kissing the side of her head.

She suddenly stopped and opened her eyes. "You're my fantasy stupid!" She barked.

His eyes widened as he raised his hands in apology. She smirked slightly and closed her eyes again, turning her attention back to pleasuring herself.

"Uh okay… I'm here if you need me." He said trying to hold back his glee.

"If you're lucky." She responded huskily.

His body pulsed.

She moaned again loudly. Tony felt Ziva's legs begin to shake. Her breathing was shallow and rapid. Tony was harder than he had ever been. His body felt like he was plugged into an electrical outlet. He was ready to explode from every pore. Ziva was starting to writhe in his arms causing friction against him like he'd never felt.

He bit his lower lip to try and maintain some semblance of control. He kissed the side of her head and placed his hands on her thighs to steady her.

Her hands suddenly reached out, her ninja quick reflexes startling him. "Finish me Tony." She whispered.

He quickly wet his fingers and reached down between her nether lips. She was engorged and erect like a berry ready to be picked off the vine. He used his thumb to hold her, his pointer finger to gently massage.

She called out in Hebrew and continued to pant. He kissed her temple once before whispering in her ear. "Let go Ziva."

And she did, crying out three times in succession before her wave of pleasure began to recede. "Shit Tony-"she mumbled, riding the crest of her orgasm.

He kissed her temple again, smiling against her. "You are so amazing." He whispered as she began to regain her control.

She smiled and undraped their legs. She turned in his arms and captured his lips, kissing him deeply which elicited a moan from him. Before he knew what was happening, she was kneeling on the bed in front of him and had taken in him in mouth.

"Fuck Ziva!" He called causing her to release him and laugh.

"Not yet my love." She whispered before taking him again.

He wound his fingers in her hair as she worked him into a frenzy. He couldn't control his body any longer as his hips involuntarily began thrusting into her mouth.

She went with it, establishing a rhythm with her mouth that was driving him crazy. He felt it happening before she did as all of his muscles began to clench.

"Ziva can't-"She released him and began working him with her hand until he came loud and hard.

He fought to catch his breath as she smiled and collapsed onto the bed next to him. He slid down until his head hit the pillows, her head immediately finding his chest.

"Damn you're good." He told her causing her to laugh.

"You are not so bad yourself." She told him, stretching her long limbs before snuggling against him again. She turned and looked into his eyes. "Wait until I get clearance from the doctor." She waggled her eyebrows in a manner she'd seen him do a million times.

He barked out laughter. "I think I better take my vitamins." He told her.

Before she could respond Jake alerted them that he was really upset about something. Tony was a mess needing to head into the bathroom again. Ziva smiled and slid off the bed, throwing a robe on and going to rescue the angry baby.

Tony stood on shaky legs and began to head towards the bathroom. He grabbed some clean clothes and continued gingerly on his trek.

He definitely needed more vitamins.

To be continued


	78. Chapter 78

**Sorry for the long delay in posting this. Life has been crazy and then I came across a small case of writer's block. I don't know when I'll get to write anymore, I'm going through a health scare with my Mother right now.**

**I do want to invite all TIVA fans to some place special. I know a lot of you were afraid to post on CBS' site due to the…. Angry…. Mob that trolls around looking for TIVA fans. Now that CBS has switched their forums, the TIVA fans have moved to a new home. It's a wonderful fun place, and if you're feeling down about our couple these people will pull you out of the doom and gloom. The link to our new happy him is now set as my homepage. Come on over and join us!**

**I know there's probably a myriad of typos in this. I'm just too tired and lazy to fix it right now. My apologies ahead of time. **

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 78**

The next lesson in being new parents came way too soon for both Tony and Ziva. Jake had woken from his nap is a foul mood and was bound and determined that he was going to drag his parents down with him.

His fits of crying would stop long enough for him to begin to nap. But as soon as either Ziva or Tony would lay him down, he'd jump awake and start again. When Ziva noted that he was only partially interested in nursing, she began to worry. What he did drink he would partially spit up due to his crying, leading to numerous clothing changes for both him and his parents.

After many hours, panic set in for both Tony and Ziva. They couldn't hold out any longer and they placed a frantic call to John. Amie had answered the phone, half asleep but immediately alert when she heard a teary Ziva on the other end of the phone. Amie could hear Jake in the background and promised them that she and John would be there as soon as possible.

Thirty minutes later there was a soft knock on the door. Tony answered it, his hair disheveled and his clothing messy. John smiled and nodded not waiting before entering the apartment. Amie was right on his heels.

Ziva was sitting exhausted on the couch, the baby curled against her shoulder. He was quiet for the moment and Ziva was afraid to move a muscle in case he started again.

John sat next to her and checked the baby. "Has he been running a fever at all?" He asked softly.

Ziva shook her head. "No. He… he spent all day smiling and happy and then this started." Amie could hear the exhaustion in her voice. She reached out a hand and placed it on her arm.

John motioned to Ziva so she would hand him the baby. The moment she moved her hand Jake's screams started again. John held him expertly, quickly checking him out.

"I'm sure it's nothing." Amie promised Ziva. Tony had walked behind the couch and placed his arms on Ziva's shoulders. He leaned down to kiss her on top of the head for support.

John listened to Jake's chest and stomach, and then smiled slightly. "Well, the good news is, I think he is just suffering from colic. The bad news is… you may have a couple of days of this."

"A couple of days?" Both Tony and Ziva said in unison.

John nodded. "I'm afraid so. There really isn't anything you can do. Just comfort them the best you can. It'll clear up on its own."

Jake's cries practically drowned out any sensible thoughts the adults could have. Tony smiled slightly. "I guess now's not a good time to ask you guys if you want to babysit?"

John and Amie smiled. Ziva reached out and took Jake back; putting him in the same position he was laying in quietly before. He settled somewhat, hiccupping every so often. John nodded. "He likes that. He can feel his Mommy's warmth and your heartbeat. It's soothing for him."

Ziva nodded and shifted back into the cushions. "I am sorry we dragged you two out for nothing."

John shook his head. "Nonsense. I don't make house calls for just anyone. But you're Amie's favorite patient and I'd never hear the end of it if I brushed you off." He said teasingly.

Amie glared at him but smiled. "Well, we're going to head back home and get back to sleep. I have an early morning ahead of me."

Ziva glanced at the clock and frowned. It was after 1am.

"Thank you so much, both of you-"She started.

John shook his head and waved her off. "If anything changes, just give me a call."

They bid Tony a goodnight, careful not to disturb the baby whose eyes were starting to close. "Good luck." Amie mouthed to Ziva before slipping out the door quietly.

The click of the closing door caused Jake to jump and the screaming began again. It was going to be a long night.

Jake had finally cried himself to sleep a little after 7am. Ziva was at wit's end, bursting into tears on several occasions. Tony himself felt ready to cry when every time he tried to take the baby and give Ziva a break, Jake would scream louder until he was back in Mommy's arms. Tony was left with trying to comfort a distraught Ziva, all the while hiding his disappointment that Jake didn't want his Daddy at all.

Ziva was finally able to lay Jake in his crib. She had no sooner set him down when his arms curled into his body tightly. She winced expecting to hear the accompanying scream… but it never came. He sighed deeply and immediately fell into a deeper sleep.

Ziva turned and collapsed against Tony's chest in tears. He gently stroked her hair and took her hands, leading her into the bedroom. He'd changed the bedding earlier so it was easy for the two of them to just collapse onto the mattress. He checked the alarm on his cellphone, knowing that he had a doctor's appointment later. Ziva was also having lunch with her Mother.

But for now, neither one of them cared. It was quiet, there were pillows under their heads, and that was all that mattered.

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What seemed like minutes later, the alarm began to sound. Ziva groaned loudly, swinging her hand in the direction of the offending contraption forgetting that Tony was in the way. She accidently smacked him on the head which caused her to force her eyes open.

"Oh Tony, I'm so sorry!" She wrapped her hands in his hair and kissed his forehead. He winced as he reached over to turn off the alarm.

"I thought Gibbs was bad." He mumbled, rubbing the spot on the top of his head where her hand had connected.

She winced and leaned forward to kiss his head again. He reached his hands out and grabbed her waist.

"Stay right there." He told her.

"Why?" She asked, confused.

"Because, at this angle, I can see perfectly down your shirt…." He mumbled, staring lecherously.

She smiled, but instead of pushing away she leaned in closer.

"See anything that you like?" She teased.

He smiled widely. "Oh yeah… You're definitely worth dying for."

She smiled at the memory and then pushed him away. Flopping down on the pillow, she stared tiredly at the clock.

"Three hours of sleep." She mumbled, wiping her hand over her face.

"Why are you angry at Josh?" Tony asked suddenly.

"What?" She asked in surprise.

He turned to his side to face her. "I woke up to use the bathroom about an hour ago. You were mumbling Josh's name. You kept saying 'How could you?'"

He flinched when her face took on the same troubled look it had after they'd left the diner the day before. "Ziva-"He began.

She turned to face him.

"What is it?" He asked, gently touching her cheek.

She looked down at the bed for a moment as if she was waging a battle within herself. After several moments, she looked him in the eyes.

"There has been something on my mind." She started.

"What?" He implored.

But before she could speak again, a wail came from down the hallway. Both Tony and Ziva sighed. He leaned forward and pecked her quickly on the lips. "Later?"

She nodded.

Tony slipped from the bed and stumbled down the hallway to the baby's room. The moment Jake saw Tony peeking over his crib he stopped crying and focused on his Daddy.

"Hey Jake, did you sleep well?" Tony asked, reaching down to pick him up. He winced; waiting for the scream he knew was coming.

Jake was quiet for the moment. Tony placed him on the changing table and make quick work of his diaper. Being groggy from his lack of sleep caused Tony to forget one very important thing. Before he knew it, Jake had managed to pee all over him and himself.

Tony closed his eyes, took a deep breath then looked at the baby. "So that's how it's going to be, huh?" He asked Jake. Tony's heart immediately melted however when Jake's face lit up into a big, toothless smile.

"Yeah, you're cute. You've got everyone wrapped around your little fingers. But I got news for you. You've got a temper like your Mommy. And and… you stink too!" Tony said in a teasing manner. Jake maintained his smile while listening to his Daddy.

Tony stripped off the babies clothes and flipped his own shirt over his head. He scooped the now clean baby up and cuddled him against his bare chest. "But you're Daddy's stinky boy, huh?"

He walked into the hallway just in time for Ziva to come out of the bathroom. She was in the middle of a large yawn but smiled when she saw her two guy stripped down to nothing but diaper and boxers.

"Get you again?" She asked Tony.

He nodded. "Of course."

Jake turned his head to look at Ziva. He smiled and Ziva's heart jumped into her throat.

It was Tony's smile.

Her hands and legs began to shake causing her to stumble slightly against the doorframe.

"Whoa, are you okay?" Tony asked, using his free hand to steady her.

She nodded and looked at Jake again who was still smiling.

His smile didn't look anything like Tony. She ran her hand over her face. 'I am imagining things.' She told herself.

"You sure?" Tony asked, concern written on his face.

She smiled sweetly. "Yes. I am just tired."

Tony looked as if he didn't completely believe her but let it go for now. "I have to get a shower for my doctor's appointment." He told her.

She nodded and took Jake from him. The moment he felt Ziva's touch he began moving around her tank top in search of his next meal.

"Okay okay. Let Mommy get situated." She told him as she began to move to the living room.

Tony touched her arm stopping her momentarily. He looked in her eyes and touched her cheek. Leaning over the baby he kissed her lips gently.

She returned the gesture before getting Jake fed. She glanced at the clock again, hoping Rivka would be on time.

She needed someone to tell her that she was, in fact, crazy.

To be continued


	79. Chapter 79

**Thanks so much for all the well wishes for my Mom. We're in a wait and see mode right now. All of her test results should be back on August 12th.**

**And of course, thanks again for all the reviews. All of you are amazing, and I'm so touched by the fact that people still love this story… and the fact that it's still going. LOL**

**For those that asked about the TIVA message board, click my name above to go to my profile, then clock 'Homepage'. It'll take ya right there. I can't put the URL here because won't format it correctly.**

**And away we go…..**

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 79**

Tony leaned against the wall of the shower wondering if it was entirely possible for a human being to sleep while standing.

When Jake had first woke up he seemed to be the same happy baby he'd always been. However, not long after he nursed the constant crying had started again.

Tony offered to cancel his doctor's appointment and stay with Ziva, but she declined, telling him that his appointment was important, not just for him but the both of them. He knew she was right but at the same time he hated leaving her with a baby who was doing nothing but crying.

Realizing that he wasn't accomplishing anything by snoozing against the wall he finished rinsing himself and turned the water off. He craned his head to listen as he stepped out of the shower.

Quiet. He couldn't hear Jake crying.

Tony sighed in relief and began to towel off, hoping that the baby had fallen asleep. He pulled on his boxers and jeans, leaving the fly unbuttoned until he was ready to tuck his dress shirt into them.

He exited the bathroom and practically tip toed into the living room. Ziva was sitting exhausted on the couch, and much to Tony's chagrin, Jake's eyes were open and he was teary eyed watching Tony come into view.

"Everything okay?" He asked Ziva quietly.

She sighed and used her chin to gesture down at herself. "This is the only way he will settle down." She mumbled.

Tony realized that she had the front buttons of her blouse and bra open. Jake was resting against her bare skin, his head tucked closely over her heart so that he could feel it beat.

"How long have you been sitting like that?" He asked.

She shrugged. "What day of the week is it again?" She replied with a tired smile.

He sat down gently. "Look, I can reschedule-"

She shook her head. "No. Really Tony. You need to keep this appointment."

Tony smiled and tried to lighten the mood. "Can wait to get your hands on me, huh?"

She grinned, too tired to rise to his teasing. "I- I need to know for sure that you are okay. I could not stand myself if our reckless behavior caused you to be ill."

He suddenly looked very serious. "Our reckless behavior? Ziva, I was the one scr-" He glanced at the baby. "-having sex with women in the restrooms of bars. You weren't there goading me on."

"No, I was not. But would you have been drinking so heavily if you knew the truth about Josh and my pregnancy from the start?"

Tony didn't answer which caused her to nod. "Exactly." She said.

"Hey." He reached out and touched her cheek which caused Jake to stir slightly. "We both made a lot of mistakes in the past. We're working on fixing them now. That counts for something, right?"

Her eyes suddenly became glassy which alarmed Tony. "Oh precious, don't cry please." He begged her.

She rolled her eyes upward in an attempt to hold her tears at bay. "Tony, how does it not bother you?"

"What?"

She gestured down at the baby who was watching Tony warily.

"That it is not your blood running through his veins. If only I could have been honest with you a long time ago he would be your baby-"

"He is my baby." He interrupted.

She sighed. "You are a wonderful Father Tony. But… what happens if God forbid something goes wrong, and he needs a transplant… or blood… and what if I do not match… if only-"

"Hey hey hey. Ziva honey, you're letting your exhaustion get the better of you. Nothing bad is going to happen. And if it does, we'll deal with it together. Biology does not make a family."

She didn't look at Tony but instead focused on the top of the baby's head. "Sometimes, I look at him, and I swear he looks like you-" She whispered.

His brows knit together momentarily and then he smiled. "Yeah, I see it too. He's picked up some of my facial gestures. I guess I should be careful what kind of faces I make at him."

Ziva stared at the baby momentarily before she turned to Tony. "Sometimes, I wonder…. What if-"

A knock at the door interrupted her. Jake jumped and Ziva's eyes closed waiting for the cry she was sure was about to come. She felt the baby's body coil up but then he relaxed against her chest again.

Tony made sure her chest was as covered as it could be before he moved towards the door. "Do you want a blanket?" He asked.

She shook her head. "It will disturb him. Besides, it is either my Mother or Eden."

Tony nodded and opened the door. Sure enough, Rivka stood there. Her face broke into a smile when she noticed Tony's state of dress.

"No wonder my daughter is so happy if you walk around like that all day." She quipped as Tony stood back and allowed her to enter.

He blushed slightly. "I just got out of the shower. I'm running a little behind here."

Rivka looked over at the couch and noticed the awkward position Ziva was holding Jacob in.

"Oh no, is he colicky?" She asked.

Ziva's eyes widened and Tony stopped short. "How did you know?" He asked her.

Rivka smiled gently as she quietly moved to sit next to Ziva. "I only went through one bout of colic with Ziva. Tali was another story. But holding them like that was one of the only ways to comfort them."

Ziva smiled at her Mother. "I am glad that I am doing something right because right now I feel like such a failure."

Rivka reached out and touched Ziva's hair. "I know honey. I remember. " Rivka glanced over and Tony who was watching the scene between Mother and daughter with interest. She smirked. "I even remember a certain 3 ½ year old yelling at me to 'shut her sister the hell up' when Tali had a particularly nasty case."

Tony laughed while Ziva blushed. "Oh, I bet you have some stories you can tell me." He said to Rivka, noticing that Ziva's mood had lightened some.

The older woman chuckled. "Oh, I do."

Tony excitedly jumped into a chair across from Rivka like a young child that had been promised ice cream. "Do tell!"

Ziva groaned. Rivka looked sympathetically at her daughter. "My favorite had to be this one time, Ziva was only two. I was pregnant with Tali and huge, I could barely stand up from sitting by myself. Eli was actually home and going on and on about this important official he was bringing home for dinner that night. Of course, he expected me to be the dutiful wife and have the house perfect, dinner cooked and Ziva acting like the perfect young lady he believed her to be."

Ziva looked intrigued to be hearing a story from her childhood, even though she had a sense it was going to end in her embarrassment.

"Ziva has been argumentative all day long. Part of that came from the fact that Eli and I were fighting all day long I'm sure. Dinner was about ready, my hair and make-up was perfect and all I had to do was get this one ready." She gestured towards Ziva. "She was in the middle of potty training and already knew how to take off her own diaper so I always dressed her in pants, plus she hated dresses. Eli INSISTED she wear a dress that night. So, I had her curls pulled up in pigtails and just needed to get her dress and shoes on her. As soon as she saw the dress she started fighting me. The next thing I knew she had ran out of her room and down the hallway. By the time I was able to get up and chase her she had her diaper laying in the middle of the floor and was streaking naked into the living room."

Ziva's face was turning pink and Tony was smiling gleefully. Rivka began to laugh. "She ran into the living room and there was Eli with the then director of Mossad, the deputy director, and their wives. Ziva stopped and looked Eli right in the face and yelled 'No!' at him. I tried to get to her but she ran to the other side of the room and stood there waggling her bare butt back and forth and singing 'No dress No dress No dress'."

Tony and Rivka were in hysterics, Ziva although embarrassed, tried not to laugh too hard so she didn't disturb Jake.

"Eli was mortified! He was so angry at me, insisting that I put her up to it. It was worth the laugh."

Once Tony had calmed, he looked lovingly at Ziva before commenting to Rivka, "I bet she was a beautiful little girl."

Rivka caught the eye exchange between them. "She was. I'll show you photos some time."

Ziva looked at her mother. "You have pictured of me as a baby?"

Rivka nodded. "Oh course. I took every photo of you I had when I left Israel. No matter what Ziva, you were always my baby girl. You always will be."

Ziva's eyes got glassy again but she didn't comment. Tony smiled and inwardly was so thankful that he'd encouraged Ziva to accept her Mother into her life again. He glanced at the clock and sighed.

"I've gotta get a move on. Rivka would you like anything?" He asked.

She shook her head. "No, I'm fine Tony."

He nodded and disappeared down the hallway. Ziva sighed. "I know you left work to come here. I wanted to have lunch ready for you when you came. He had other ideas." She said, gesturing down at the baby.

Rivka smiled. "Well one good thing about being the boss is that I can come and go as I please. Plus it'll give me a chance to cook for you."

She stood and moved into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and cupboards before deciding on what to make. She opened a large can of soup and poured it into a pan, setting it on the stove to warm. Pulling out several items from the fridge, she placed turkey bacon in a pan and started slicing tomatoes.

"Soup and BLTs?" She asked causing Ziva to smile.

"That sounds wonderful and I am starving. But I will not be able to eat." Ziva said, gesturing down at the baby.

Rivka smiled. "Nonsense." She walked over to the laundry closet where a basket of dirty baby clothes was waiting to be washed. She quickly placed them in the washer, pouring baby detergent in and allowing the washer to fill.

She glanced over at the sofa and smiled slightly when she saw Ziva's eyes half closed. Tony appeared fully dressed by the time the washing machine had started swishing the clothes around. Rivka gestured with a finger to her mouth for him to be quiet, gesturing over to the couch.

Jake's eyes were closed, his mouth opened slightly as he slept. Ziva's arms were snug around the baby while her head resting against the back of the couch in slumber.

Tony smiled and moved walked over to them. The battle waged inside of him again as he stared down at Ziva and the baby.

Rivka made up his mind as she appeared next to him and put an arm on his shoulder. "You go, I'll take care of it." She told him.

Tony smiled and nodded to her. She disappeared back into the kitchen and stirred something on the stove. Tony leaned down and kissed both Ziva and Jake on the head before he whispered his thanks to Rivka and slipped quietly out the door.

She smiled and stared at her sleeping daughter and grandchild. 'That man adores her.' She thought to herself.

She walked into the living room and bent down, gently taking Jake from Ziva's arms. The baby shifted his body momentarily before deciding sleep was more important to him right now. She smiled and walked down the hallway glancing in the various rooms before finding the nursery. She placed the baby in his crib and grabbed the monitor off of it's charger.

Walking back to the living room she moved back to the couch to attempt to get Ziva in a more comfortable position to nap. As she got closer she froze and gasped.

Ziva's clothing was still open and most of her breast exposed. But what caught Rivka's attention wasn't Ziva's breast, but the bite shape scar that marred her skin.

Rivka's stomach churned for several moments before she reached down and pulled Ziva's shirt closed. "Oh baby, what did they do to you?" She asked quietly.

She reached out and gently moved Ziva to a sleeping position on the sofa. Ziva barely stirred, only to sigh when Rivka covered her with a blanket.

Rivka moved back to the kitchen and continued to slowly make their lunch, trying not to make any extra noise as her hands shook in rage.

To Be Continued


	80. Chapter 80

**Thank you everyone for the well wishes! Mom is okay. Negative for bone cancer. =D**

**So.. after a rather.. eventful day on the Tiva Board (LOL) I managed to squeeze this chapter out. It's a little longer than normal, hope y'all don't mind. g**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 80**

Ziva awoke feeling a little more refreshed then she had. As her consciousness began to swim into focus she immediately panicked.

Her arms were empty. She's fallen asleep with Jake in her arms. She jumped up knocking her blanket to the floor.

"It's okay Ziva. I put Jake in his crib."

Ziva sighed in relief before wiping her face with her hands and pushing her messy hair back. "How long was I asleep?" She asked.

Rivka smiled from the kitchen. "About half an hour."

Ziva picked the blanket up from the floor and folded it, tossing it into an empty chair beside the couch. "I am sorry Mother. I invited you over and then-"

Rivka shrugged. "Nonsense. I just enjoy being around you, sleeping or not."

Ziva smiled and realized her shirt had been haphazardly pushed closed but not fastened. She began working on the buttons. "Lunch smells wonderful."

Her mother smiled. "I suggest you get over here and eat while you have the chance."

Ziva smiled slightly and nodded, moving over to the dining room table as Rivka placed two bowls of steaming soup down. She disappeared into the kitchen and appeared with two sandwiches and glasses of iced tea for both of them.

Ziva bit into her sandwich and moaned slightly. "This is so good."

Rivka smiled. "It's just a BLT dear. Nothing special."

Ziva looked down at her sandwich but didn't reply. Rivka noticed her reaction and reached across the table taking her daughter's hand in hers. "What is it?"

Ziva shrugged. "Maybe… it tastes really good because you made it."

Rivka smiled which caused Ziva's face to light up. "I remember your grandmother's cooking. I could duplicate her recipe perfectly but it still tasted extra special when she made it. It must be a mother's extra special ingredient." Ziva looked at her. "Love for her child."

Ziva smiled brilliantly which choked Rivka up slightly. Ziva noticed and squeezed her hand. "What?"

Rivka shook her head before releasing Ziva's hand. "I spent way too long believing I would never see that smile again."

Ziva flushed slightly before eating more of her lunch. At one point, they heard Jake muttering slightly but then he was quiet again, bringing great relief to his exhausted Mother.

"You told me on the phone there was something you wanted to talk to me about." Rivka reminded once they were sure the baby was going to sleep for a while longer.

Ziva paused and nodded as she wiped her mouth with a napkin. "I did… I do."

"Is it about that scar on your breast?" Rivka asked bluntly.

Ziva's hand wavered causing her to drop her spoon. It clanged loudly against her bowl before hitting the table.

"No- I .. I do not know if I can talk to you about that." Ziva admitted.

Rivka was disappointed but didn't let it show. "Is it from Somalia?"

"Yes." Ziva answered quickly. She reached out and took both of Rivka's hands in hers. "Please do not think I am shutting you out. That is not my intent. It is just… there are things I need to share and work out with Tony first before I can let anyone else in. "

Riva smiled. "I understand. Just know that I will listen if you need me too."

Ziva smiled. "I will remember. I just… right now I have to concentrate on Tony and making our relationship work. It is important for us and for Jake."

"That man adores you." Rivka pointed out.

Ziva smiled. "And I him. I never… I never knew what it felt like being loved by someone like this… It is the most amazing and powerful feeling in the world." She replied wistfully.

Her mother smiled. "It makes me so happy to see the two of you… well, the three of you getting this chance."

Ziva leaned back in her chair. "This is partially because of you, you know that right?" Rivka looked at her surprised. "If you had not ingrained in me what a normal life could be like, and treated me not as a weapon but as your daughter when I was growing up… I fear my life would be a lot different than it is now."

Rivka answered her quietly. "You would probably be dead like your brother."

Ziva flinched slightly. She looked as if she was going to admit something to Rivka, but then stopped.

"I know Ziva."

Ziva's brows furrowed as she looked at her mother. "How? Josh did not even know."

Rivka sighed deeply. "Eli told me. Josh and Eden were in a panic when you went on the mission to Somalia. Josh called me hoping I could find something out. I went marching into Eli's office and we had a terrible confrontation. He told me then what you had done."

Ziva's eyes were glassy. "It was the only time he had ever told me he was proud of me... when I murdered my own brother-"Her voice was beginning to crack.

Rivka pulled her out of her chair and led her back over to the couch. "Ziva, do you truly think that man you shot in Gibbs' basement was your brother?"

"Of course it was Ari-"

Rivka shook her head, cutting her off. "No, that's not what I mean. Your brother Ziva… I remember a smiling, happy little boy who adored his baby sisters. He would come with me and Tali to your dance recitals and help carry you home when exhaustion overtook you from all the excitement of the night. You brother is the boy who, when Eli took away all your dolls because you were too "old" to play with them, skipped eating lunch at school for two weeks so he could buy you a doll to play with in secret. Your brother is the one who would whisk you girls away to Paris and let you shop and drink, even though you weren't old enough. He was the one who beat up the first boy who broke your heart, just because."

Ziva looked at her mother. "I did not know-"

Rivka smiled slightly. "That boy… you tried to talk to me about him. He was the first boy you ever … had sex with. He broke up with you right after, yes?"

Ziva's face flushed. "Yes. He got what he wanted from me."

Rivka nodded. "Well, Ari tracked him down and let him know how wrong his opinion of you was. I got a call from the boy's Father angry because he had a broken nose and bruised ribs. Eli had to write a nice check to get them to not press charges."

Ziva was flustered. "I never knew." Then she chuckled. "He was not even all that good-"She stopped and blushed furiously remembering who she was talking to.

Rivka laughed gleefully. "Oh, my dear, we've all had a couple of those in our lives. The ones who are bad in bed are the ones who brag the loudest about how great they are."

Ziva grinned mischievously. "Except for Tony."

"Really?"

She nodded. "He brags… large time. But, I think he will be wonderful when the time comes."

Rivka sat back and looked at her. "You two have never-?"

Ziva shook her head. "Never. Not all the way. Our relationship did not start to piece together until after Jake was born. I have not been given clearance by the doctor yet."

"Is that what you wanted to talk to me about?"

Ziva shook her head. "No. The other night, when you and Gibbs were here for dinner… when you first met Jake, you started to say he looked like someone. Who were you going to say?"

Rivka frowned. "Oh honey, I was so nervous I could barely stand on my own two feet. Gibbs had to practically force me out of bed-"Her voice trailed off when she saw Ziva's eyes widen.

"Are you and Gibbs-? Oh God, no do not tell me. I do not want to know."

Rivka chuckled. "ANYWAY, my point is… I could have thought he looked like the Easter Bunny Ziva."

Ziva caught the look on her Mother's face. "You are lying to me."

Rivka's brows furrowed as she looked at her daughter. "Why are you asking me this?"

Ziva sighed. "Josh had known for a very long time how I felt about Tony. I told Josh years ago that I had fallen in love with him. I thought we had a really good chance and… it did not happen. A good friend of ours died, I got sent back to Israel… it all just fell apart. But he knew and always encouraged me to push Tony, to find out what he was feeling. But I was always afraid. It just never seemed the right time, and in the few instances it did, something would happen and it would fall apart before it even got started."

Rivka nodded. "You didn't always have the best role models in the relationship department growing up. I'm sure that didn't help."

Ziva smiled slightly. "It was not that. I was terrified of telling him. What if he laughed at me? What if he pulled away from me completely because he did not feel the same? I could not take that risk. I depended on him too much. I had given up all hope. But in Somalia… he told me how he felt. I thought that after I healed, we would be able to perhaps move forward together."

"And that didn't happen?"

Ziva shook her head. "No. We went right back to the same 'holding pattern' we had always been in. I had given up hope. I had convinced myself that he said those things in Somalia to give me hope, so I would help fight to get out of there if need be. I was in Miami working a case and Josh came down to meet me. I'd had a few drinks too many and started commiserating about how I would like to be a mother one day. That was when this idea was born. He suggested it… I thought about it for a very long time before agreeing. And that was how we got Jake. "

Rivka nodded. "So what does this have to do with who I think Jake looks like?"

Ziva sighed. "Years ago, back when Tony was in college, he'd donated sperm to a sperm bank." She heard Rivka's intake of breath. "I had told Josh the story one time, about how I was teasing Tony mercilessly about it. And now… I look at Jake and sometimes… he looks so much like Tony it makes me wonder-"

"If Josh didn't so something underhanded and used Tony's sperm?" Rivka finished for her.

Ziva nodded. "Then I have to remind myself that Josh was my friend. He would never do something so devious to me. It must just be wishful thinking on my part."

Rivka sighed and looked down at her lap. "Ziva honey, I'll be honest with you." She looked straight into Ziva's eyes.

"I do think Jacob looks like Tony. Not just a little bit either… a lot."

Ziva gasped involuntarily.

"As for Josh… I have no doubt that he loved you like a sister he never had. Eden too. But I also know that he wasn't quite the saint people made him out to be."

"What do you mean?"

"Gibbs told me that he wanted to have a baby and then had a relapse of his cancer after. That was a lie. I've been going through his papers since he passed…. He knew he'd come out of remission before he ever met you in Miami."

Ziva felt as if a vice was clenched around her heart. "He lied to me." She repeated.

Rivka reached out and placed a hand on her knee. "I have to talk to Eden as well. I found three very large checks made out to a neurologist in Tel Aviv. If I'm not mistaken, the checks were written shortly after she took that bullet to her leg."

Ziva gasped as she felt sick to her stomach. "Do you think he paid off her doctor? For what purpose?"

Rivka shrugged. "I know that doctor. I'd met him a few times. He's a good doctor, but his morals are shall we say.. lacking? He was the primary surgeon for Mossad for many years. I can only assume he still holds the same position. That's why I need to talk to Eden."

"Mother, do you think-?" Although she felt sickened and betrayed at the same time, a part of her was showing hope that maybe… just maybe….

"I do not know Ziva. I still have a lot of questions. I will continue to go through his things, to see if I can find anything. But, if you think that maybe, somehow Josh pulled a switch, you have access to a DNA lab at NCIS."

Ziva shook her head. "I cannot bring Abby into this, not before Tony knows my suspicions."

Rivka's shoulders fell. "You haven't told him?"

Ziva shook her head. "I've tried… but something always seems to happen to interrupt. I just started really thinking about it within the last couple of days. I will tell him, I just… it will crush him to get his hopes up and then have it taken away."

Rivka sighed. "What about your fertility specialist? Can you talk to him?"

"Her. Yes, I can. I have an appointment in a few days with her anyway…."

Rivka nodded. "Well there ya go. If you don't want to get Tony too excited then talk to her first about the possibility. Then just take it from there."

Ziva thought for a moment then nodded. "We do have a busy few days coming up. Tomorrow we are moving Tony in here permanently. Sunday will be spent unpacking and arguing over where to put things I am sure."

Rivka smiled. "That's what you're going to do on Sunday?"

Ziva nodded. "Yes. What else would we be doing?"

Her mother smirked. "Oh, I don't know honey. You just might be surprised."

* * *

Tony left the doctor's office and pulled out his cellphone, glancing at the screen to make sure he didn't miss any important calls from Ziva.

Smiling slightly he tucked it back into his pocket and continued walking down the sidewalk towards the parking lot where he'd parked. The doctor had given him a fairly clean bill of health, renewed his inhaler prescription and told him to call on Wednesday for his blood work results.

Tony sighed at the admonishment he'd received from his doctor after explaining to him why he wanted the blood tests run again. As soon as the words 'unprotected sex' had left his lips, his doctor had bulked and scolded him. As he listened to his lungs, he'd sat down and explained to Tony that as a result of the lung damage he'd suffered years ago during his bout of Y Pestis, he'd also developed asthma. It had been mostly controlled in the last few years, but now Tony had noticed himself wheezing more and more. The doctor placed him on a permanent inhaler instead of the occasional one he'd been using.

"Great. Just great." He thought to himself.

He jogged across the street to CVS to drop off the prescription. He pharmacist told him it would be about a ten minute wait. He shuffled around the aisles of the store looking at nothing in particular. Suddenly, a large shelf of greeting cards caught his attention.

"Happy Mother's Day" they all proclaimed.

"Oh God… Sunday was Mother's Day." With everything going on it had completely slipped his mind.

Well, it hadn't slipped his mind, he didn't even think about it.

"Wow." He muttered out loud and began poking through the cards. This was going to be Ziva's first Mother's Day ever, and he was bound to make it special for her.

He spent twenty minutes reading cards before he found the perfect one. He pulled out his cellphone and dialed home to check on things.

"Hi." Ziva answered after seeing his name on her caller ID.

"Hi yourself. How was your lunch with your Mother?" He asked.

"Wonderful. She's actually still here."

Tony smiled. "I'm glad to hear that. How's Jake?"

"Sleeping on top of the dryer." She replied.

"He's what?" Tony asked.

Ziva chuckled. "He woke up and was crying. He would not let either one of us hold him. So, Mother took a chance and put him in his car seat on top of the dryer and turned it on. It worked perfectly. He is sitting contently… and quietly."

Tony laughed. "Well, we'll have to remember that trick."

He could hear Ziva's smile through the phone. "Will you be much longer?"

Tony glanced at his watch. "Just a few errands to run and I'll be home. Do you miss me?" He teased.

She was quiet for a moment before she replied. "Yes." She said bluntly.

He smiled and brought the phone closer to his mouth. "I miss you too. And I haven't been gone for two hours yet."

She smiled and blushed a little. "Hurry home."

"I will. I love you."

"I love you too." She replied before disconnecting the line.

He continued to smile contently before closing his cellphone. Now that he had the perfect card it was time to grab his medicine and hurry off to the next stop.

* * *

He'd arrived home over an hour later with several small bags in his hand. Ziva was sitting on the couch next to her Mother. Jake was laying back against Ziva's chest with his tongue stuck out a little.

"Hey big guy, how are you feeling?" He asked bending down and kissing the baby on the head.

Ziva smiled as Tony also caught her lips with his. "He is much better now. His little ride on the dryer seemed to work wonders."

Tony shook his head and laughed. "You're a weird kid Jake. That's why I like ya!"

Ziva was looking curiously at the bags in his hand. "What are those?"

Tony made an extra point to snatch the bags away from her. "For me and Jake to know and you to find out." He took the prescription bag out of his hand and placed it on the table to read. "Except that one."

Ziva frowned. Her eyes locked with Tony's causing his breath to hitch. There was sadness to them that he hadn't seen in a long, long time.

"No, it's just-"He ripped the stapled bag open and dumped out the small box. Opening it, he showed her the small red inhaler. "Asthma. It's gotten worse so the doctor wants me to use this daily as a precaution."

She took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay." She agreed.

He disappeared down the hallway with the remaining bags. Coming back into the room, he noted the Rivka was messing around in the kitchen. He stepped close to her and whispered.

"Listen, Sunday is Mother's Day. I don't think Ziva realizes it."

Rivka chucked. "She doesn't. I didn't tell her either. Is that what your surprise is?"

He smiled and nodded. "Yeah. But I was thinking… maybe you can come over for dinner?"

Rivka smiled and patted his chest. "Thank you for thinking of me. But, sadly, I leave on a flight Sunday morning. I won't be back for several days."

"Oh, well that's too bad."

"What are you two whispering about?" Ziva called from the living room.

They both smiled. "Well, I was just telling Tony how I have to head out of town on business Sunday."

"And I was asking her what kind of pizza she likes because I am starving!" He announced.

Ziva smiled and shook her head. She glanced down and saw that Jake had slid down a little bit and turned his head so that he was looking up at her and smiling, his eyes twinkling.

Her breath caught again. She'd seen that same smile on Tony's face so many times. She heard Tony and Rivka talking in the distance but they seemed a million miles away as she continued to stare down at her son.

"What kind of secrets are you holding Jake?" She whispered to him. He continued to smile at her.

"Ziva? Ziva?" Tony said more loudly to get her attention.

"What? Sorry." She turned and looked at him.

"Hey, I know he's a gorgeous kid but jeez-"He teased, she smiled slightly. "Do you want anything special with your pizza?"

She thought for a moment. "Yes, boneless wings. And a nice slice of cheesecake."

He smiled. "You got it. Rivka just went to call Gibbs." Tony frowned slightly as if trying to figure out why.

"That is because-"She stopped, widening her eyes and gesturing with her head hoping Tony would get the hint without her having to say it.

"Because- what? That? Oh God…." Tony looked shocked, happy and sickened all at the same time.

Ziva shook her head. Tony went to order the food and then came and took Jake in his arms. Jake settled into the crook of his arm and smiled up at him.

"Well there's my most favorite son in the world. I was wondering where you'd disappeared to the last couple of days."

"He better be your ONLY son in the world." Ziva warned.

He chuckled and leaned over, kissing her quickly on the mouth.

* * *

Gibbs arrived before the food did. He and Rivka played their relationship somewhat casually, which Tony and Ziva were grateful for.

Jake allowed Tony to feed and burp him before it was his bath time. Tony and Gibbs were cleaning up the food containers in the kitchen as Rivka played with the baby.

"Mother, I do not think I can keep this from him. I have to tell him."

Rivka nodded. "It is up to you sweetheart. That man loves you and this baby with all of his heart. You know him better than anybody. You'll find the right time to tell him."

She glanced down at the baby in her arms as Tony and Gibbs joined them in the living room. "Now, I believe this little boy needs a bath. Perfect thing for Grandma and Grandpa to do before they leave. Come on Jethro."

Tony flopped down on the couch with Ziva and laid his head on her leg. "This should be good." He whispered.

She chuckled and began running her hands through his hair, stroking his scalp gently.

Gibbs obediently followed Rivka down the hallway. "Hey, who are you calling Grandpa?" they heard him ask before their voices disappeared.

Tony sighed contently as Ziva continued to stroke his hair. "That's nice." He mumbled.

She smiled. "Tony?" She started quietly.

"Hmmm?" He replied.

"I have to talk to you about something important."

"'kay."

"It's about Jake…I….. I think Josh may have done something unthinkable. I think.. I think maybe there is a chance that he switched donors and used your sperm when Jake was conceived."

She was met with silence. "Tony? Say something please."

"Tony?"

A soft snore was her reply. Exasperated, she dropped her head to the back of the couch.

This was not going to be easy.

To Be Continued


	81. Chapter 81

**Thanks again to everyone who reviewed, story alerted, e-mailed, private messaged etc. regarding the story. I can't say "Thank you" enough to all of you!**

**For once, I have a lot of time on my hands this weekend, so hopefully my muse will cooperate and give us more than one chapter, yes?**

**Some of this chapter is a little dark. It's hard to flash back to Somalia without it, ya know?**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 81**

Ziva blinked several times as her eyes drifted open. She squinted against the low light in the living room before moaning slightly at the achy feeling in her neck.

She glanced down at her lap where Tony was still out like a light. Somehow, he'd managed to get a blanket over top of him and had barely moved a muscle since he'd fallen asleep.

She craned her head around to hear the interaction between her Mother and Gibbs who had gone to bathe the baby. However, the apartment was quiet.

Now that she thought about it… the lights hadn't been turned down this low either. She glanced at the time on the cable box and cringed. It was past midnight.

'Oh God, I fell asleep too.' She realized with horror. She felt horrible for falling asleep on her guests. She rolled her eyes and shook her head, determined to make it up to them somehow.

She gently lifted Tony's head from her lap and placed it softly on the cushion beneath them. He barely stirred as she stood from the couch and stretched. She then noticed that Jake's baby monitor had been placed on the table in next to the sofa.

She tiptoed into the baby's room and glanced over the crib railing. Jake was sleeping soundly; his arms and legs were stretched out so he resembled a starfish. Ziva smiled down at her sleeping son and took a few extra moments to stare at him. She watched his small chest rise softly up and down as he breathed. She placed her hand gently on his chest so she could feel his heartbeat pitter pattering under her fingers.

Ziva's father had always preached to her that miracles didn't exist. Sure, good things could happen in life, but miracles were part of fantasies in which their work didn't allow them to have. Rivka on the other hand had always told her what a miracle she and Tali had been, and how she wouldn't understand until she was a mother herself.

By the time she was twelve, Ziva no longer believed her Mother. The more time she spent with her Father and Ari, the more she'd seen of the 'real' world. It certainly wasn't filled her fairy tales, pink fluffy cloud and purple bunnies.

It was cold and harsh, filled with deceit, destruction and death. Eli had enforced in Ziva how it was important for her to help him and Ari battle that evil, so children born later could have that fairytale life.

It took a long time and a lot of heartache for Ziva to realize that the world is what you make of it. She had changed her life by coming to NCIS. There had been some bumps in the road, but Ziva would never forget the first miracle she had ever experienced.

Tony.

In Somalia, she'd been laying on the filth covered floor of her cement cell. They'd moved her back in there after leaving her locked in a small box for she didn't know how long.

Earlier she'd been stripped of her clothing, beaten with a whip and then sexually assaulted with handle of what looked like a wooden spoon. Her hands were bound behind her and she was being held down. She didn't know what the point of them holding her was anymore. She no longer fought them. She couldn't fight them.

Saleem was the one with the 'weapon' while the other men fondled and spit on her. Saleem's second in command had forced himself into her mouth while Saleem continued assaulting both physically and verbally. Someone was holding her hair while Yasir thrust hard into her triggering her gag reflex. Saleem laughed as Yasir spurt into her mouth and then quickly forced her mouth closed so she was forced to swallow.

Saleem continued demanding information, promised her that it would all stop if she would just tell him.

Yasir still had himself exposed and was forcing himself into her face. Her mind was screaming 'Tell them tell them' over and over just to make it stop.

But still she resisted. She shook her head 'no' which enraged Saleem. He threw the now bloodied piece of wood across the room. She hears it hit the wall and then clang to the floor.

He yelled an order to Yasir which twisted Ziva gut. Saleem told him to 'take her', and gestured to her pelvic area. She hadn't been raped in this manner since her miscarriage. It was further indication that Saleem was reaching the end of his rope and would kill her soon.

She welcomed it, more so now than the day she walked into his camp.

The thought of having another one of these animals inside of her triggered her panic response. She began to fight her bonds and tried to pull her head away from the man that was still holding her hair.

Saleem laughed. "You know the deal!" He screamed at her.

Yasir was on top of her now. He'd bitten into her breast and she could feel either spit or blood running down her chest. He was teasing her entrance when she did something she hadn't done in weeks.

She spoke. "N-C-"Her throat was dry and her lips cracked from dehydration.

But Saleem heard enough. He roughly kicked Yasir off of her and ordered the other to release her hair.

Yasir had scrambled to his feet and was fixing his clothing. Saleem barked an order to them and gestured towards the door. Both men disappeared, slamming the door closed behind them.

Saleem bent down to where she lay on the floor and gave her a gentle smile. "Smart girl." He told her.

Yasir returned a moment later with a glass of water. Saleem took it and nodded, dismissing the other man with barely a nod. He brought it to Ziva's lips. She looked at it in surprise.

It was clean. She hadn't been given clean water since she arrived.

Using what little might she had, she fought off the urge to gulp the liquid. She sipped gingerly and prayed to whatever God would listen that Saleem wouldn't take it away.

"You drink like a bird." He commented, again using that soft tone.

She didn't reply. He allowed a couple more sips before he pulled the glass away again.

"Tell me." He implored her, taunting her with the cold water.

In a split second she relived the humiliation and torture she'd gone through since she'd arrived. All of the horrors crashed down on her at once mingled with the almost kindness Saleem was offering her now.

If she told him what he wanted to know, it would all stop…

"N-"Her voice faltered. Saleem allowed her another sip and then pulled his knife. She flinched, having been threatened with that knife on many occasions.

However, this time it wasn't a threat. Instead, he cut the ropes that held her hands.

And then, in a moment of clarity she'd never experienced in her life, one memory came to her.

Tony, tousling her hair as they stood talking after Michelle Lee's funeral. That was a gentle touch… a good touch. A touch that conveyed caring.

Saleem was lying to her. Using what little strength she had she pushed her feet against the floor and slid away from him.

The stone floor cut against her already ragged skin. She'd only managed to move a few inches, but the significance of it was enough.

But to prove her point, she spoke one last time. "No-"

Saleem screamed in rage and threw the glass against the wall. He screamed for Yasir to return. He must not have been too far away because he was back in the room in seconds. Saleem murmured under his breath to him. Ziva turned her head and realized that the shattered glass was laying just a few feet away. Some of the pieces were large enough.

She pushed her feet again, scooting across the floor towards her salvation. Saleem and Yasir were involved in their conversation and not paying attention to her.

Her hand wrapped around the largest glass shard just as Saleem had turned.

"You are his for the night!" He yelled in her direction before noticing she had moved. Yasir saw the threat too and rushed towards her, grabbing at her ankle and jerking her away from the threat.

Too late. Using her last gasp of energy she suddenly sat up and swung. She knew she'd nailed her target when Yasir's blood immediately began spraying over her.

Saleem yelled and the room was suddenly filled with men. Yasir had fallen to the floor as his life bled out of the glass sized hole in his jugular. Someone, she wasn't even sure who, had grabbed Ziva's wrist. She heard it snap before feeling the pain but she didn't care.

The men worked feverishly to save Yasir but to no avail. She watched in satisfaction as they carried his lifeless body from the room. Saleem appeared from the crowd and stood over her as she sat against the wall.

He was breathing fire in a way like she'd never seen. She was terrified at what he would do.

But no matter what horrors she knew was coming her way, her defiant streak took over. She raised her eyes, looked up at Saleem and smiled softly.

"That- w-was from NCIS." She forced out before his boot connected with the side of her head.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been unconscious but when she'd come to, she was in a large metal box of some sort. She'd practically been folded in half and shoved into it. She couldn't sit up straight or straighten her legs or arms out as there wasn't room. And the box had been left in the direct sun almost as if they wanted to bake her alive.

Perhaps they did. She'd counted three sunrises since she'd regained consciousness and still no one bothered her.

Men would come into the room, gaze into the opening to see if she was still breathing and then disappeared just as quickly. Never once did she see Saleem.

She'd gotten used to the sounds in the hallway, but on the day of the third sunrise it changed. The men seemed nervous, scampering around the hallways faster than they normally did.

The door opened again, but this time, one of the men opened the top of the box. He grabbed her arm quickly and attempted to yank her to her feet.

Her legs gave out from under her. He grabbed her again and tried to help her again, this time steadying her. Hold her with one arm, he slammed the top of the box down and gently sat her on it.

He spoke to her in Arabic. "Why do you continue to resist?"

She tried to focus on his face but couldn't. As her vision swam into focus she almost gasped. The 'man' couldn't have been any older than fourteen. He didn't even look old enough to shave.

He reached behind his hip and pulled up his canteen forcing it into her good hand before moving to the other side of the room.

"Here are your clothes. I am to move you back to your cell."

Ziva didn't even make an attempt to reach for her clothes. She clutched the flask and continued to stare at the boy.

He sighed and grabbed the flask away from her. Closing the top, he put it down and began dressing her.

His touch wasn't rough at all, but she still flinched. He gingerly slipped her broken wrist through the arms of her shirt and stood back, satisfied that she was as presentable as he could make her. He picked up the flask and opened it again, thrusting it back into her hand.

"Drink quickly."

She shook her head and thrust it back at him. He sighed and capped the top again, hooking it back on his belt. He reached into his pocket and pulled out two protein bars stuffing them into the pocket of her shirt to conceal them.

"Do not tell him that I gave you anything." He warned her.

She simply blinked in reply.

He jumped slightly at the sound of the door being opened. Two men appeared, both of them leering at Ziva. They spoke to the boy.

"What is taking so long?" One of them demanded.

The boy shrugged. "She could barely stand. I had to dress her."

The two men chuckled. They grabbed her arms roughly and hauled her to her feet, dragging her down the hallway towards her cell.

Once they entered, she was tossed her roughly to the floor and they left.

She didn't see anyone again for the rest of the day. Something different was happening, but she had no idea what it was.

The following day, Saleem appeared with a bag in his hand. She'd regained some of her strength by rationing the protein bars, eating them in small bits every so often. The two men who had thrown her back in here appeared with Saleem, hauling her to her feet as Saleem placed the bag on her head. He grabbed her arms and led her down the halls. She'd lost her way with the twists and turns they'd taken.

Finally, she was thrust into a chair and that was when her belief in miracles was reborn.

Tony.

Ziva shook the memories from her head as she continued staring down at her other miracle. Every ounce of innocence in the world was nestled into his tiny body, and it was up to her and Tony to make sure he never lost it.

A sound from behind her caused her to smile. "Making sure he's still breathing?" Tony whispered into her ear as he wrapped his arms around her from behind.

She smiled and shook her head. "No. Just feeling his heartbeat."

Tony kissed the side of her head. "You should come to bed. We've got a long day ahead of us tomorrow."

She sighed. "We both fell asleep on Gibbs and my Mother. I still have to clean up the kitchen."

Tony pulled away slightly. "I thought you already did. I was going to clean it when I woke up but it's spotless."

Ziva shook her head. "We have a wonderful family Tony."

She smiled and squeezed her tightly. "We'll see tomorrow when it comes to the heavy lifting."

Putting her arms over top of his she melted back into his embrace. "Come on, let's go to bed." He told her again.

She nodded and kissed her fingertips placing them gently on Jake's head. Tony took her hand and led her into their room. He stripped down to his T-shirt and boxers and began to climb into bed.

Ziva stood tentatively in front of him. She reached out and grabbed his shirt and pulled it over his head. Tony smiled and climbed under the covers and then smiled even more when Ziva stripped down to nothing but her panties.

Tony loved it when she slept like this, even though there was the occasional incident with leaking breast milk. Secretly, although it mortified Ziva, it didn't bother Tony in the slightest. Although he loved being able to feed Jake, he found Ziva's breastfeeding to be such a natural and amazing experience.

Sleep was returning quickly but he forced himself to stay awake long enough for Ziva to join him under the covers. She quickly curled against his shoulder, placing her hand over his heart as she had been earlier with Jake.

"Are you okay?" He asked her softly.

She smiled and nodded. "Yes. I just like to be reminded of the miracles in my life from time to time."

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her gently. "We should sleep. We have a long day tomorrow."

She nodded. "But before, there's something important I need to talk to you about."

He nodded. "Okay, first thing in the morning, I promise."

She smiled and closed her eyes. Minutes later, they'd both drifted off to sleep.

To Be Continued


	82. Chapter 82

**Well, Aldea survived an earthquake and getting slammed by Hurricane Irene, all in a few days. Okay Mother Nature, we on the East Coast get your joke, you can stop now. :-o**

**And as always, I want to thank all of you readers for your continued support of this story. Normally, I would gush, but instead I want to gush about someone else.**

**There is a TIVA Fan named NCISJunkie. I'm not sure if she is even reading this story or not, but she did something extraordinary last night. While Aldea and some other Tiva Fans were cowering in their homes with tornado warnings (not watches, warnings mind you) last night one after the other, NCISJunkie, who luckily wasn't in the Hurricane's path, sat online on Twitter staring at the National Weather's Service website and providing us precise up to the second information as to where the tornados were and when it was safe to come out of our hiding spots. (For Aldea, I literally had 4 instances of grabbing my cellphone, Flashlight and cat and locking us into the bathroom). NCISJunkie sat up way past her bedtime, worried for the TIVA fans on the East Coast, some of us she's never met face to face before. Knowing that I had her giving me up to the minute info on where the pre-hurricane tornados were helped keep me calmer than I would have been if Patches and I were locked in the bathroom alone. That makes NCISJunkie a pretty amazing human being in my book. Hopefully, she's catching up on her sleep today, and a simple 'thank you' just doesn't seem to be enough. I've already promised her that if we meet facet o face, I owe her an "Abby" hug NCISJunkie, you rock!**

**And with that, on with the show…**

**Disclaimer still applies!**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 82**

_BANGBANGBANGBANGBANG_

Tony cringed at the sound of someone hammering on their door. Ziva inhaled sharply and moved slightly, however she nestled back into her pillows.

'Must be the neighbors' Tony thought closing his eyes and settling back for more sleep.

It was a rough night. Ziva had experienced a horrible nightmare which had left her sweaty and shaking as Tony had tried to wake her. She'd freaked, trying to escape his grip and slapping his hands away before she'd regained her senses and realized what was happening.

He'd try to comfort her but to his chagrin she'd shaken her head and turned away from him, pulling the blankets up to her chain with her back facing him. He had laid back down on his pillows and waited, hoping Ziva would change her mind.

He almost gave up hope and begged for sleep to return when he heard her sniffle. Instinctually, he'd reached out to place a hand on her back in support but stopped himself, knowing that at that moment, she didn't want to be consoled.

But his heart sang when she'd sensed his movement and reached a hand behind her and grabbed his. She pulled his hand in front of her and kissed it effectively pulling his arm around her.

He took her signal and relaxed his arm around her. She then scooted back closer to him signaling that she wanted to be in his arm. He'd gladly obliged. She'd absorbed his warmth for several moments before she started speaking softly, reliving her earlier memory of her final nightmarish days in Saleem's camp.

Tony felt the acid churning in his stomach, but he remained silent and held her tight as she spoke. Her voice broke and faltered several times, but his silent strength gave her all the encouragement she needed to continue.

When she'd finished, she'd turned in his arms to face him and then cried harder. "How can you do it Tony?"

He was confused by her question. "Do what?"

"Love me like you knowing what they did-"

He'd silenced her with his lips. "Ziva, I loved you long before Somalia. And after… I love you even more for surviving it. You did it baby, you beat them." He pecked her lips again. "You won." He kissed her again.

She launched herself into his chest and cried. "Sometimes, I do not think so-" she'd murmured against his chest.

He'd taken her face in his hands, softly using his thumbs to wipe away her tears. "Don't ever doubt it baby. Don't ever doubt us. Remember, that together, we're stronger than anything in this world."

And then she'd smiled; not one of her coy Ziva smiles, but the Ziva smile she reserved for certain occasions… the Ziva smile that would light up any darkened room and always brought Tony to his knees when he was graced with it.

It had taken some time for them to settle enough to sleep again. And once they did, Tony had then been plagued with a nightmare he hadn't experienced in a long time.

Too late. They'd arrived at Saleem's camp just a few minutes too late. He'd heard Tim yell "Clear!" before they'd kicked the large wooden door in and there was Saleem, standing over Ziva's bloody, ravaged body. Her dead eyes were open and staring directly at him, no light left in her eyes at all.

If only they'd been a minutes sooner-

He'd jumped awake and dumped Ziva haphazardly onto the mattress which of course woke her. She'd asked him what the dream was about but he couldn't explain.

Deep down, he knew he didn't have to. She knew it had to do with Somalia.

He'd grabbed her and crushed her to him, burying his face in her hair. She'd returned his earlier favor without question, pouring her entire soul into comforting him. They'd attempted sleep again later when Jake woke up, looking for a snack.

_BANGBANGBANGBANGBANG_

'Damn neighbor'. Tony swore to himself hearing the annoying banging again.

Ziva raised her head from the pillow and pushed her hair out of her eyes to glance at the clock.

"Dammit Tony! We overslept!" She said, throwing the blankets back and jumping from the bed.

"Wha-?" He mumbled before her words sunk in. By the time he had his side of the blankets back Ziva had pulled on her robe and was heading to the door.

She stumbled into the living room and threw the door open, barely acknowledging Gibbs and her Mother standing there. She grunted and stood back to allow them entrance into the apartment.

Before anyone could say a word, Jake started screaming from the nursery. Ziva seemed out of sorts and a bit torn on what direction to head in first.

Ziva shook her head a little as Tony appeared. She glanced at him and pointed to the kitchen. "Coffee." She said as she went in to get the baby.

Tony looked at their guests apologetically. "Sorry boss, it was a rough night."

"Dinozzo?"

"Yeah boss?"

"Don't call me boss while you're standing there in your underwear."

Rivka snickered at Gibbs' deadpan expression while Tony looked down at himself in chagrin. Sure enough, he only had on his boxers.

"Uh, yeah-" Tony stammered before returning to the bedroom to pull on some clothes.

Rivka looked at the grin on Gibbs' face and shook her head. They listened as Jake continued to fuss in the nursery.

Ziva appeared with him several moments later. She looked exhausted and exasperated at the same time. The baby was squirming against her shoulder and getting louder by the second.

She quickly flopped onto the couch and threw a light blanket over her shoulder. Pulling her robe open under the blanket allowed Jake access to his intended target. He latched onto her breast and began to drink greedily, humming slightly as he swallowed.

"Jeez-" Ziva commented lifting the blanket slightly and glancing down at her famished son.

Rivka laughed. "When was the last time he ate?"

Ziva glanced at the clock. "Four hours ago. His appetite is usually like this."

Gibbs chuckled. "He eats like his Father." He'd intended it as a joke, but noted the look that passed between Mother and daughter.

"Actually, Ziva ate like that too when she was in infant." Rivka admitted, breaking the sudden tension that had developed.

Ziva grinned. "Really?"

Rivka nodded. "You never got enough eating from one breast, you always had to have both. I had no clue what I was doing but it seemed to work for us." She said with a laugh as Ziva blushed slightly.

Tony appeared a moment later and approached Ziva from behind the couch. He bent and kissed her on the temple. "Is he okay?" He asked her quietly.

She nodded and turned to look at him. "Just hungry. He did not even want me to change him."

Their eyes locked momentarily and they were immediately lost reliving the night of comfort they'd offered each other. Their foreheads touched momentarily. Tony reached up and stroked her cheek softly. "I love you." He whispered.

She smiled and kissed him gently. They continued to gaze at one another for several moments before he turned and walked to the kitchen. He was thankful that they had a single cup coffee maker that brewed a cup of java in seconds. He quickly made one for Ziva and fixed it to her taste before making his own, loading it down with sugar hoping for an extra jolt.

He looked to Gibbs and Rivka noticing that they both held Styrofoam cups in their hands. Tony handed a cup to Ziva before flopping down on the couch next to Ziva. He sipped his hot cup gingerly before leaning over and lifting the blanket to speak to Jake.

"'Morning buddy. Couldn't wait this morning, huh?"

Jake slowed his eating slightly but otherwise didn't acknowledge Tony. He chuckled. "Mama's boy."

Ziva smiled. "Only when it is time to eat."

"So do you have a plan DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked.

Tony nodded. "Yeah. Mainly just clothes. The refrigerator needs to be cleaned out. The food in there has been there for weeks." He suddenly realized.

Gibbs looked at him strangely. Tony shrugged. "Well, I sort of came over here and never left I guess." He said with a sheepish grin. Ziva chuckled.

"Furniture?" Gibbs asked. Tony shook his head. Just the Tv and Blu Ray player with the sound system. And the movies. Clothes. A few personal items."

"That's all?" Rivka asked.

Tony nodded and looked at Ziva. "I've got everything I need here already."

She caught the double entendre in his words and blushed slightly again. She smiled at him and shook her head. "He will change his mind if Jake gets colic again." She joked, knowing full well Tony would be with her every step of the way.

Gibbs chuckled. "I doubt that."

Ziva felt Jake release her breast and peeked under the blanket. He was looking up at her and batting his eyelashes. The minute he saw her looking he broke into a wide smile.

She turned him and tried to offer him her other breast. He turned his head and fussed at her. "Okay okay, you are full." She told him.

She brought him out from under the blanket. Realizing there was a room full of people, Jake immediately put on the charm, batting his lashes and lighting his face up in a toothless smile.

Rivka laughed and stood, offering to take Jake and burp him. "I leave for Tel Aviv later tonight. I'll miss him while I'm gone." She explained.

Ziva eyed her carefully. "You're going to Tel Aviv?"

Rivka nodded. "It's a boring business trip. I'll only be gone a couple of days." She said with a smile.

She'd barely patted Jake's back when he let out a large belch which made the adults laugh.

"Dinozzo, why is this boy acting so much like you? First the eating, then the flirting, now the belching?" Gibbs admonished in a teasing manner.

Tony smirked and put his hands in front of him in an "I surrender" manner. "Can't blame me, it's not my DNA. He must get it from Ziva."

Ziva had just finished fixing her clothes and had taken a sip of coffee. She choked a bit which sent her into a coughing fit.

Tony laughed and started patting her back. "Easy there. Do I have to burp you too?" He asked laughing.

Gibbs saw it again; Rivka and Ziva shared a look before Ziva turned to Tony and smirked. She stood from the couch and then leaned over him, allowing her robe to fall open so he had a clear view down the front of it. "You're just trying to get me on your lap." She whispered, kissing him on the forehead and disappearing down the hallway to get changed.

"Enough grab assing you two." Gibbs said, deep down thrilled to see the two of them happy.

They heard Ziva call from down the hallway. "We're not in the office Gibbs." She reminded him smartly.

Tony smiled proud of her comeback before turning and looking at his Boss who was holding up a set of keys. "Yeah, but I've got the truck."

Down the hallway, Ziva made a decision. She grabbed her cellphone off of it's charger and quickly called Amie.

"Hey Ziva, how's Jake feeling?" Came Amie's reply.

"He is fine. He started feeling better yesterday. Today he is all smiles."

"Good. Is something else wrong?" Amie asked, knowing that Ziva didn't generally call her on a weekend unless there was an emergency.

"No. Well, yes. I need to see you."

"I'm at the office. I'll be here for a couple more hours."

Ziva nodded although Amie couldn't see her. "Okay, I will stop by."

Amie agreed and disconnected the line. Ziva took a deep breath and listened to the conversation from the living room.

She had to know, once and for all.

To Be Continued


	83. Chapter 83

**Again, thanks for all the reviews!**

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 83**

After hanging up with Amie, Ziva quickly dressed and rejoined her family in the living room. She felt a bit apprehensive but had made up her mind.

"Mother and I will follow. I have a quick stop to make. We will meet you there."

Tony nodded and deposited his coffee cup in the sink before heading to follow Gibbs out the door.

"Tony wait!" Ziva called.

He turned to her and seeing what she was holding, smiled sheepishly. "Guess I need to get used to that, huh?"

She nodded and smiled, walking to him and kissing his cheek before handing him the inhaler his doctor had prescribed.

He kissed her on the forehead before disappearing out the door. Ziva turned to Rivka and sighed.

"I hate this. I have to find out if Josh-" Her voice trailed off.

Rivka smiled slightly and tilted her head to the side. "I understand. What did Tony say?"

Ziva rolled her eyes in exasperation. "I have not been able to tell him. He fell asleep last night, and then we promised to talk this morning and we overslept."

Rivka shook her head. "Okay, then you tell him later today. What are we doing in the meantime?"

"Going to see my doctor. I want you to meet her anyway. She is an OB/GYN who specializes in high risk and infertile couples. She-" Ziva's voice trailed off.

"What?" Rivka encouraged.

"She is also a rape crisis counselor. She takes on many of the victims as patients." Ziva said softly.

Rivka took a deep breath and closed her eyes momentarily. Finally, she looked deep into Ziva's and smiled.

"Then I cannot wait to meet her." She responded simply to Ziva's hidden confession.

Ziva released the breath she didn't realize she was holding and smiled.

"Well, let us get Jake packed up and we can go."

They arrived at Amie's office within the hour. Ziva lifted Jake's car seat and snapped it into place on his stroller. Rolling the baby up to the door, she rang the bell outside signaling to Amie she was there. The doors were of course locked due to it being the weekend.

Amie appeared moments later. She smiled when she saw her guests and unlocked the door.

"Hey Jake!" She greeted the baby who heard his name and smiled. Once Ziva and Rivka were through the door, Amie quickly locked it and turned to shake Rivka's hand.

"You must be Ziva's mother ? I'm Amie."

"How did you know I was her Mother?" Rivka asked intrigued.

Amie smiled brightly. "The resemblance is uncanny. And oh, I can't help myself. Come here gorgeous!" She reached down and unstrapped Jake lifting him into her arms.

The baby settled comfortably against her. Ziva shook her head. "He really is a flirt." She pointed out.

Amie laughed and led them through the empty clinic and into her office. "He's too gorgeous not to be a flirt."

She sat back in her chair and studied Ziva's face closely. "You look tired." She pointed out.

Ziva's eyes dropped to the floor. "I had a bit of a hard time sleeping last night."

Amie chose her words carefully. "Is that why you wanted to see me?"

Ziva shook her head. "No, it was… I was remembering my-" She glanced at her mother; "-last few days in Somalia. It brought on some nightmares."

Amie nodded but didn't speak. Ziva looked at her incredulously. "I have spent enough time with you to know that it is bad when you do not respond."

Amie smiled slightly. "Okay. Why were you remembering?"

In contrast to the subject matter Ziva smiled peacefully. "I was watching Jake sleep and thinking about miracles. " She reached out and took Rivka's hand. "My father had always insisted there was no such thing. Mother had tried to teach me differently. I was thinking of what a miracle Jake is. He was the second miracle I ever experienced."

Amie's brows knit. "And the first miracle you associate with Somalia?"

Ziva nodded. "Yes." She squeezed Rivka's hand momentarily before continuing. "After months of being starved, beaten, tortured and… raped… to see Tony sitting in front of me… to know that after everything that had happened… what I had allowed to happen… that he was there, smiling at me-"

Amie smiled and nodded understanding. Rivka looked a bit pale but squeezed Ziva's hand tightly.

"But still the memory gave you nightmares." Amie said softly.

Ziva nodded slightly. "The… the days leading up to Tony's arrival were some of the worst-" Her voice trailed off.

Amie moved Jake up to her shoulder . "How did you feel after you had the nightmare?"

Ziva sought for the right words. "Terrified. Dirty. Disgusted." She closed her eyes and searched her memory. "And loved like I have never felt. "

She dropped Rivka's hand and smoothed her hair back. "I.. I told Tony everything about those last few days. I told him about all of the men and what they did to me… about the box and being left there to die. I asked him how he could still love me after that."

"And what did he say?" Amie asked as she rubbed Jake's back.

Ziva's eyes had started to tear up but she smiled. "He told me about how much he loved me before Somalia… and how he loved me even more afterwards. And how I won… because I survived. I beat them. And how he and I could together could beat anything." A lone tear streamed down her face.

Amie leaned her head back against her chair and smiled. "And that Ziva is the absolute truth. It lightens my heart so much to hear you talking so openly to Tony about what you went through. Tony is an amazing man who adores you. It's not easy hearing your recollections about what you went through. But he's so strong and loves you so much. He WANTS to know. And you're okay sharing that with him. Out of all the breakthroughs you have had, I truly believe this is the biggest."

Ziva smiled. "The first time I told him any details about what I went through… he ran from the room and threw up. But he came right back and wanted to hear more."

Jake was now dozing against Amie's shoulder. She stood and placed him back in his stroller. "Did I ever tell you that I wasn't the first doctor they called for you?"

Ziva's brow furrowed in response. "They called me in because of my expertise in working with rape patients, but they called other…. Military trained… therapists to work with you. They didn't think I had the chops I guess."

Ziva shook her head. "I could not imagine recovering from it without you."

Amie snorted. "You had been sedated at Bethesda and I had completed your exam and rape kit. I sat and listened to two 'military' therapists who wouldn't even take you on as a patient. After reading your medical report, one didn't think he could help you at all. The other… she was afraid of your Father."

Rivka stared at Amie for a moment. "And you're not?"

Amie shrugged. "What do I know about Mossad or what it means to be an officer? I learned from Ziva as we went along. Eli David means nothing to me."

Ziva chuckled. "He would probably laugh to hear you say that."

Amie smiled. "Ziva, you have come so far. I didn't know if I would be able to reach you. And now, here you are, you've got a beautiful baby, a wonderful man who adores you. You're about to embark on your final stage of healing. I am so proud of you."

Ziva's eyes filled with tears that she unsuccessfully tried to hold at bay. "Well, I cannot embark on anything until I get clearance from you."

Amie laughed. "Is that what this is about? You want me to do your exam today?"

Ziva shook her head. "No-well wait- can you?"

Amie shrugged. "It's just what three days before your appointment? You'll still need to come in and get your blood drawn but I can do it today. But that wasn't why you came here?"

Ziva shook her head. "You're going to think I am crazy but… I need to see my IVF file."

Amie sat back in her chair. "Okay, is there something in particular you're looking for?"

"I need to see the donor files for my last procedure. I…. I think Joshua may have done something crazy…."

Amie's senses immediately heightened. "Like what?"

Ziva nodded towards the baby. "Years ago, Tony donated sperm while he was in college. I'm seeing Tony in Jake more and more every day. I just… I have to know. If Josh somehow found Tony's donor file and chose that one without me knowing-"

Amie put a hand up. "Wait wait,-"

Ziva began to babble. "I know it's a long shot and maybe even wishful thinking on my part but-"

"Ziva, honey." Rivka interrupted trying to calm her nervous daughter.

"I can pull the file Ziva. But if I remember correctly, didn't you tell me a long time ago that Tony went to school in Ohio?"

Ziva nodded. "Yes. Ohio State."

Amie's shoulders sagged a bit. "Ziva, it's impossible. I only use donors from a clinic here in the area. None of the donors I use come from anywhere else unless the Mother has her own donor."

Ziva's stomach clenched as her heart sank at the same time. "I… I swear I see-" Her voice broke slightly.

Rivka placed a hand on Ziva's back. Amie nodded and stood. "I'll pull the file."

Ziva shook her head. "No- no do not bother. I think Jake is just picking up Tony's mannerisms, that could be what I am seeing, yes?"

"Possibly." Amie said sympathetically.

Ziva felt guilty for what she was feeling. Tony didn't care that Jake wasn't his. Jake didn't know the difference. Tony loved him no matter what. So why did she feel like the rug had been pulled out from under her?

"You- you said we could do the exam today?" Ziva asked.

Amie smiled. "Absolutely. Give me a minute to get an exam room ready."

She excused herself leaving Ziva and Rivka alone. "You can sit with the baby a minute, yes?"

Rivka nodded. "Absolutely. Are you okay honey?"

"Yes. I- I am wondering if I am losing my mind."

Rivka nodded. "No honey. Perhaps you think of your past with Tony as bit of a missed opportunity… and somehow you were projecting your wants onto Jake? Does that even make sense?"

Ziva smiled and nodded. "Yes. Tony and I have chosen to focus on the future, not the past. I apparantely am not doing such a great job of it."

"Ziva?" Amie called from the door. "Ready."

Ziva left her purse with her Mother as she followed Amie into the exam room. Amie had a gown waiting for her which Ziva grabbed and went behind the changing screen.

"Have you had any cramping or bleeding?" Amie asked as she studied Ziva's file from the hospital to refresh herself.

"No. The spotting stopped about two weeks after I delivered."

Amie nodded. "Good. And your cycle hasn't returned yet?"

Ziva came out from behind the curtain wearing nothing but the paper gown and her socks.

"No signs of it at all."

Ziva sat on the table as Amie took her blood pressure, temp and pulse. "You're lucky I like you. I have nurses that do this for me."

Ziva smiled as Amie patted her arm. "Okay, lay back honey."

Ziva felt her body tense as she laid down on the table. Amie opened the front of her gown at her chest and began the breast exam. "Did your lactation nurse teach you how to do your breast exams?"

"Yes. I have actually taught Tony. He enjoys helping out." Ziva joked. She flinched when Amie's jacket barely brushed the skin below her breasts.

Amie paused and waited for her to relax again. "Good. Any pain in your breasts at all?"

Ziva shook her head. "Sometimes they get achy if they get too full, but that is normal, yes?"

Amie smiled. "Absolutely." She closed Ziva's gown for her. "Ready?"

Ziva swallowed but nodded. Amie dropped the bottom of the table down and raised the foot rests. Ziva shifted down the bed slightly and placed her feet in position.

The doctor noted that Ziva's eyes were closed so she waited a few moments before putting her hand on Ziva's bared knee.

"Okay honey. The first thing I'm going to check won't hurt a bit. I just want to check your episiotomy line, okay?"

Ziva nodded but didn't speak. Amie noted the awkward angle she was laying in so that he knees were together.

She parted her knees gently but did nothing more. "Okay?" She asked Ziva.

"Yes." She replied giving her a halfhearted smile.

Ziva could sense Amie's presence and although she trusted her, couldn't help but feel a slight sense of panic deep within her. Breathe in and out. In and out.

"Ziva that healed wonderfully. There is hardly any scar at all."

"I do not suppose that means I am done." Ziva joked.

Amie laughed. "Oh, don't all women wish it was that easy?" Ziva heard her slide the instrument tray closer to her. "So Ziva, tell me again about the time you and Tony went undercover."

Ziva chuckled before launching into the story of their stint as married assassins Jean-Paul and Sophie Rainier. She and Amie were laughing over Tony's 'push ups' to imitate them having sex when Ziva flinched feeling the instruments being used during her exam.

Amie felt her flinch. "So, Tony was actually able to do 100 push ups with you lying naked beneath him? He must have nerves of steel."

"I was not naked then. I had on a negligee. But I was quite impressed with his stamina." Ziva chuckled.

"It amazes me that the two of you kept your hands off of each other for so long." Amie commented.

"Oh, we pushed the boundries a few times. A lot of times actually. But never crossed it." Ziva said wistfully.

"Guess what?" Amie asked her.

"What?" Ziva asked.

Amie came back into her direct view. "We're done."

Ziva smiled. "Really?"

Amie nodded. "Everything looks great. You've healed marvelously. Keep your appointment Tuesday. I always like to check my breast feeding Mom's for anemia. I also want some ultrasound shots."

Ziva's brow knit together. "Is something wrong?"

Amie smiled. "No, not at all. I just want to compare them to your prior photos before you got pregnant. You have a lot of scar tissue in there honey. I just want to see what's changed."

"Go ahead, go get dressed."

Ziva gladly hopped off the table and went to put her clothes back on. Amie finished labeling her test and writing in her notes.

When she emerged from the curtain, Amie patted to a bed. "Come, sit for a second."

Ziva looked a bit worried but sat back down.

"I just wanted to chat with you for a second. Everything is fine, so I'm giving you the green light."

Ziva smiled and averted her eyes, blushing a bit.

"Don't push yourself Ziva. If your mind is telling you that you're not ready then you're not. Tony should understand that."

"He would never push me." Ziva confirmed.

Amie nodded. "And like I've told you before, childbirth is a natural thing, however it's also like a bomb going off inside a woman's body. You may not feel yourself getting as stimulated as you used to, or things that your body used to enjoy may not do the same for you now. Because your tissues are still healing you may experience dryness. It's not because you're not enjoying it. Use lubricant the first few times, even if you think you don't need it."

Ziva nodded.

"If something hurts, don't force it. You are still healing. And honey, the slightest bit of discomfort can cause a setback."

Ziva knew what she meant by setback. Feeling pain during sex would be an automatic trigger to her memories of Somalia. Definitely a no.

Amie took her hands. "You trust Tony with your life. You trust him with your son. You trust him with your heart. Now it's time to trust him with your body."

Ziva didn't know why she felt the sudden impulse, but she reached out and enveloped Amie in a hug Abby would be proud of.

"Thank you so much. For everything."

Amie smiled. "It's been my absolute pleasure."

* * *

Hours later, they finally had Jake bathed and fed. Both Tony and Ziva collapsed into bed. Exhaustion had set in by Noon but unfortunately, there was more to do at Tony's apartment than anyone had anticipated.

However, thanks to their family and friends, everything was now safely tucked into Ziva's spare bedroom. The chore of unpacking and rearranging would come tomorrow.

"I am so glad that is done." Tony mumbled staring up at the ceiling.

Ziva smiled. "You had more stuff than you thought, yes?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, I guess so. I thought you and your Mom had ditched us earlier."

"I actually went to see Amie, there was something I wanted to talk to her about."

Tony figured it had to do with the nightmare she'd had the night before. "I'm glad. You should have brought Amie over to pack some bmmmm-"

Her lips were suddenly on him roughly stopping him in mid sentence. She continued to kiss him as she slid her body on top of him and straddled his torse.

"That's nice." He said with a smile.

Ziva smiled back. "It is the only way I can get this out. I have been trying to tell you something for days."

He reached up and pushed her hair back. "What?"

"I… I have been noticing more and more that Jake… sometimes when he smiled or gets a particular look on his face… he reminds me of you. At first I thought it was just him picking up your mannerisms."

Tony nodded and slipped his hands under her shirt, gently stroking her ribcage. "Well yeah, that's normal right?"

Ziva nodded. "But then other people started noticing it and commenting. Mother had just met you and almost let it slip that he looks like you. And then the waitress at the diner that day-"

Tony stopped her. "Wait wait, Ziva, what are you saying?"

She took a deep breath. "I started to wonder that if by some chance… maybe… just maybe…. Josh had somehow pulled something and used your sperm."

He sat up quickly almost knocking Ziva off of him. She began to run her words together. "I know that you have said it does not matter and I can see how much you love Jake no matter what, but how amazing would it be if you were his biological Father. But I know now that is not possible."

Tony's mind was spinning. "Wait so… you thought that Josh lied to you and pulled something behind your back and… swapped sperm donors."

She looked slightly guilty. "Yes. Mother found evidence in his papers that appears like he paid off Eden's Doctor in Israel to lie and get her out of Mossad. So I thought that maybe-"

Tony interrupted her. "Why do you think it's not possible?"

Ziva sighed. "I went to see Amie. And she told me she only uses donors from a local clinic. And since you donated in Ohio-"

Tony pulled her to him and wrapped his arms around her. She buried his face in her neck.

"Did it bother you to think Josh may have done something like that?"

Ziva shrugged and pulled away. "Yes. Although his intentions would've been good… imagine if he had done that, and we never gotten together. What if the truth came out and there we were, partners who had never slept together but had a child."

"He would've thought he was helping you.. and Eden. He said to me numerous times before he died that he wanted nothing more but for the two of you to be happy."

"By doing what he thought best? Eli thought the same thing, as did Michael and Malachai- I do not need people to dictate what is best for me. I am a grown woman, I can make my own choices."

He smiled and kissed her gently, before moving them so that she was lying down and he was on top of her. They kissed for several moments before he pulled away.

"Ziva?"

"Hmm?"

"Remember back when you first found out I donated sperm?"

"Yes."

He looked her in the eyes. "You were teasing me… and then they told me no one wanted my guys… it was a bruise to my ego."

"Tony, I did not mean to hurt you."

"I know, it's not that….. to prove you wrong, I went and donated again to a sperm bank about four blocks from Amie's office."

To Be Continued


	84. Chapter 84

**Wow, it seems like everyone is all stirred up. I hope this chapter continues to deliver.**

**Again, thanks for all the reviews! Baby Jake appreciated all the interest in his little life so far. LOL**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 84**

Every muscle in Ziva's body clenched. "You….." She couldn't find the words.

Tony stared down at the comforter beneath them intentionally not making eye contact with her.

"Ziva, I-" he stopped, his mind reeling at the possibilities.

She touched his shoulder. "We… we have to find out the truth Tony."

He didn't speak for several moments. Instead, he continued to look elsewhere, everywhere but at her.

"Tony?" She asked softly.

He finally turned to her. "I- uh.. don't know what to say. I never thought there was a possibility…."

Ziva sighed. His reaction was worrying her. "You have accepted Jake into your life without any hesitation whatsoever. If you are or are not his biological Father, I do not see anything changing between the two of you."

He nodded slightly but averted his eyes. After what seemed like several minutes he replied. "Do you want to know?"

She nodded. "Yes. But one way or another, you are his Father. I will leave the decision up to you." She touched his shoulder again. "We are exhausted. We can talk more tomorrow. Let's just rest for now."

He nodded and stood from the bed pulling back the blankets and letting Ziva get settled underneath. He immediately spooned up behind her, sliding his hand under her shirt and bra until it rested over her heart.

"I love you." He whispered into her ear.

She smiled and leaned her face back to peck his lips. "I love you too, so much."

His eyes immediately closed but she could tell from his body posture that he wasn't asleep. Her mind was reeling and completely confused by Tony's reaction. Hopefully, tomorrow he would be more willing to talk.

* * *

She'd awoken a few hours later and realized Tony was no longer in bed with her. Glancing at the clock she sighed and threw back the blankets, going to find Tony.

A soft light was emanating from Jake's room. She stopped in the doorway and leaned against the frame, watching while Tony fed Jake a bottle and stared down at him.

"I did not hear him wake up." She commented.

Tony didn't look up at her. "He didn't. I woke him up. I just had to come in and hold him. I couldn't help it."

He continued rocking the baby for several moments before he looked up at her. "Ziva… I'm not sure if I want to know the truth or not." He finally admitted.

She walked over and knelt before Tony's knees. "Why?"

Tony glanced lovingly down at the baby. "My entire life I always felt like a disappointment to my Father. No matter what I did, it wasn't good enough." He looked up and she was taken aback by the glassiness of his eyes.

"I don't ever, ever want to look at Jake with any trace of disappointment in my eyes. I don't want him to ever think he's not good enough for me."

She smiled. "You are an amazing father Tony. Jake knows you love him. He looks at you with so much love in his eyes. A DNA test isn't going to change that."

He didn't reply but instead chose to stare down at the baby whose eyes were half closed.

Ziva reached up and took his face in her hands. "Tony, you are not your father, just like I am not Eli. It was a long, hard lesson for me to learn that. Do you think I could ever fall in love with someone like your father?"

She smiled slightly which brought a small grin to his face as he focused on her. She leaned over the baby and kissed Tony gently. "Do you think I would ever trust someone like your Father with him?" She asked gesturing towards the baby.

Tony leaned back in the chair and stared at her. "I… I just want to think about it. I know that you want to know-"

She nodded. "It.. it is hard to think that Joshua could have lied to me like that. But I have come to the realization that he lied for a long time. He knew he was sick again long before I was even pregnant. And Eden, Mother has found evidence of at least three checks made out to her doctor in Israel. I have not even had the opportunity to talk to her about that."

Tony noticed Ziva's expression change. "You're worried about talking to Eden?"

Ziva nodded and smiled at him. "I can no longer hide anything from you." She quipped. "Yes, I am. If it is true, and the damage to her leg is not what she was told, I have no doubt that she will rejoin Mossad as an active agent."

Tony thought for a moment. "I thought she had settled into her life here."

Ziva nodded. "Out of necessity. She loved being an active agent. If she finds out that it was a lie, she will be gone."

Tony sighed. "I'm sorry."

Ziva shrugged. "Eden is not unlike I was several years ago. It took me working at NCIS and seeing all the possibilities that were out there for me to change. Eden has not had that." She trailed off quietly.

Now that the bottle was drained Tony moved Jake up to his shoulder. "Go ahead and go back to bed. I'll be back as soon as I'm done with the Little Man."

Ziva watched him for a few moments before rubbing her hands on his legs. "Are you sure?"

He smiled and nodded. "Jake and I have a few plans to discuss anyway."

Her eyebrow rose. "Plans?"

Tony nodded and smiled but said nothing more. Ziva stood and kissed Jake on the head before running her hands through Tony's hair.

He waited until she disappeared out of the room before he looked down at Jake. "What do you think Jake? " He watched as Jake turned his face towards Tony's voice. Seeing the small set up dark brown eyes look at him like this always brought a smile to Tony's face. Tony continued to pat Jake's back. "Do you think we should find out buddy?"

Jake belched his reply.

Tony couldn't help but chuckle as Jake followed up his burp with a yawn. "Okay, I get the hint. Daddy's sorry he woke you up. I just…. I love you so much. I… I want to do everything that's right for you. I know I can't give you a perfect life, but I swear Jake, it's going to be a great one. I promise you that."

Tony kissed the baby gently and stood to lay him back in his crib.

In the bedroom, Ziva listened to the exchange on the baby monitor. She wiped the tears that were threatening to spill down her face. Tony appeared a few moments later and hesitated slightly in the doorway.

Ziva tossed the blankets back and patted the bed. He smiled and climbed in next to her immediately enveloping her into his arms. She settled her head on his left shoulder and reached her left hand around to trace his facial features. Her touch was so soft Tony barely felt it.

"You are an amazing Father Anthony DiNozzo, Jr." She whispered to him bringing a smile to his face. He leaned down and captured her lips with his.

"Thank you." He whispered to her before joining her hands with his.

She smiled and closed her eyes. She felt Tony's body relax into slumber moments before she drifted off.

* * *

"Mmmmm-" Ziva moaned hours later when a pair of exquisite lips woke her from a deep sleep.

"Wake up sleepyhead." She heard Tony whisper. She refused to open her eyes.

"Come on Ziva. Jake is very excited to see you."

She blew air through her lips. "Why?" She mumbled with a slight smile on her face.

"You have to come and see." Tony implored almost like a child.

She opened her eyes and noticed that he was dressed… as in fully dressed in a work suit complete with tie.

Her brows knit together. "Did I sleep for weeks?" She asked wondering if Tony was going to the office.

He took both of her hands and gently pulled. She sighed and followed, padding behind him in her bare feet.

Halfway down the hallway she smelled a wonderful myriad of aromas coming from the kitchen. Tony dropped her hands and rushed ahead slightly and stopped near Jake who was sitting in his baby seat and looking around the room. He sensed Tony come next to him and began to wave his hands and kick his feet.

Ziva paused in confusion.

"Happy Mother's Day!" Tony exclaimed excitedly. His elation caused Jake to smile.

Ziva gasped. "Oh my… I forgot-"

Tony laughed. "I know. But we didn't!" He exclaimed.

Ziva smiled and walked to her two men, gently kissing Tony and bending to kiss Jake on the forehead.

She laughed when she saw what Jake was wearing. He had on a jumper, designed to look like a miniature tuxedo although not quite getting it right. It came complete with a matching bib with a bow tie on the top.

"Did you get all dressed up for Mommy?"

Jake smiled as if he was taking credit for everything. She turned to Tony and stood on her tiptoes, using her hands to pull his lips down to hers.

"This is amazing Tony, thank you."

"You haven't even seen the best part yet!" He exclaimed.

Jake began to squirm in his seat. "And I guess the best part is going to have to wait because a certain someone is hungry."

Ziva smiled and unhooked the straps holding Jake. She lifted him to her shoulder and he immediately began searching for food.

"Oh, he is hungry." Ziva laughed, moving to the couch and settling in. She'd barely had her bra open but had to laugh at the baby who had his mouth open and was searching. "Wow, when was the last time you ate?"

He latched on and began to nurse, swallowing loud enough for Tony to hear him. "Jeez." He commented. Once the table was set he moved to the living room and cuddled next to Ziva and the baby.

"You know… if you're going to keep storing milk, we might want to invest on getting another freezer. We're running out of room in the kitchen. "He commented, kissing the side of her head.

She nodded. "I do want to keep storing it. I will not be able to nurse once I go back to work. But I want him to keep getting breast milk for as long as he can."

"Well, once we get the guest room straightened out, we can put a small one in there I guess. Every apartment can always use more freezer space." He joked.

She smiled. They sat quietly for almost fifteen minutes just basking in one another's presence. Tony noticed that the baby had released her breast.

"Is he done? Breakfast is getting cold."

"I do not think so." She moved Jake to her other breast in which he immediately latched on and started nursing again. She looked at Tony. "I am sorry. It smells wonderful. "

"It's okay. He takes priority." Tony said with a smile.

Ziva nodded. "Plus my breasts were so full they felt like they were going to burst."

He gently stroked Ziva's hair while the baby nursed. "I think I've decided…."

"You have?"

He nodded. "I… I think we need to know, one way or another. I mean if there's a medical emergency of some sort we would have to know his blood type anyway. But…. I WANT to know."

Ziva smiled slightly. "You will be disappointed if we are wrong."

Tony shook his head. "No. It won't change how I feel about him. And it'll confirm that Josh didn't lie to you."

Ziva sighed which caused the baby to squirm slightly. "I.. I do not know how to feel about the prospect. Yet another man in my life who lied to me."

She forced a smile on her face and turned back to Tony. "However, you… you are the most important man in my life. I know that you would never lie to me, or use me."

"I adore you too much to do that." He said kissing the tip of her nose.

She smiled and looked down at the baby who was looking up and his parents, milk slightly drooling from the side of his mouth.

Ziva laughed. "I believe he is done now."

Tony motioned to take him from her. "Here, I'll burp him, you go eat."

Ziva fixed her clothes and followed Tony over to the table. She whistled at the layout of food.

"Tony, you must have been cooking for hours!" She exclaimed.

He shrugged as he worked with Jake. "He helped."

She smiled and began loading her plate with eggs, bacon, sausage, and hash browns. Using a smaller plate she put pancakes and fresh sliced fruit on and topped it off with two slices of toast.

Tony grimaced. "Uh…. We might have overdone it with the food Jake…."

Ziva's brow wrinkled. "Nonsense. I am going to eat every bite."

Tony laughed. "Okay-" He dared.

She grinned and dug into her food, pausing only long enough to laugh when Jake expelled air from two places almost simultaneously.

"Ugh!" Tony exclaimed. "That was more than gas. Grab your gear Jake. We've got a dead diaper on a stinky butt!" Tony mocked Gibbs as he stood and took the baby into his room.

Ziva laughed and shook her head. Looking at the food still on her plate she took a deep breath before digging in again.

Tony and the baby reappeared a few minutes later. "Much better."

She smiled and gestured to his empty plate. "You are not going to eat?"

He smiled. "I will. I'm just enjoying watching you right now."

"Will you still enjoy it when I gain 15 pounds from eating all this food?"

He smiled lecherously. "Yeah-" he whispered causing Ziva to redden slightly.

"Then you will be happy to know that when I went to see Amie yesterday she did my postpartum exam."

Tony's ears perked up immediately. "And?"

She shrugged nonchalantly. "And… she cleared me for….active duty." She said with a bit of heat in her voice.

Tony smiled broadly. "Reeeeealy?" He said.

She laughed and pushed away one empty plate.

As she worked on her pancakes she felt Tony suddenly reach out and take her hand. "Hey, no pressure, right?"

She smiled and rubbed his hand. "I know. When will your tests be back?"

Tony sighed. "Tuesday."

She nodded. "Two more days. And then, when the time is right, it will just be you and I, no barriers in between."

"Uh Ziva… I know you said that you can't get pregnant naturally, but um… how sure about that is Amie?"

She smiled sadly. "Nothing is 100% Tony. But considering how hard it was for the in vitro…. I have to believe her. Since Somalia, I rarely even have a menstrual cycle anymore. She put me on low dose birth control to try to regulate it but…."

"Okay hey, no serious talk today okay? Today is about celebrating the best Mommy in the world, isn't it buddy?"

They both laughed when they realized Jake was asleep. Ziva finished her plate and stood taking Jake into her arms.

"Come on sleepyhead." She whispered as she took him into his room and laid him down in the crib.

She returned to Tony who wasn't eating. Instead he was sitting on the couch and staring around the apartment.

"You look lost in thought." She pointed out as she sat next to him.

He smiled. "I'm just…. thinking. I'm so afraid that I'm going to suddenly wake up and realize all of this is a dream."

She moved until she was sitting on his lap straddling him. They kissed for several moments before she pulled away.

"This is not going to disappear Tony." She promised.

He smiled and played with a few loose curls from her still sleep-mussed hair. "It doesn't feel real." He confessed to her.

She took his hand and slid it under her shirt and allowed it to rest on her ribcage. "Do I feel real Tony?" She whispered.

He caught her lips again allowing his hand to slide over her ribs and to the bottom edge of her bra. She slid her body closer encouraging him.

His hand slipped under her bra and began to gently massage her. She moaned against his mouth.

"Tony-" She whispered breathlessly.

"Am I hurting you?" He asked moving his hand from her breast.

"No." She smiled. "Your touch is wonderful, but we have things to do."

He groaned and allowed his forehead to rest on hers. "Do they include touching?" He whispered.

She chuckled. "Later. If you are a good boy." She promised.

"I think Abby is coming over later. She wants to bring you a cake."

Ziva smiled. "Well then touching will definitely have to be later. Come on and eat breakfast. I have to take a shower."

He sighed as her warmth disappeared. He stood and went to the table, piling food onto his plate and popping it into the microwave. He heard the water running in the shower and longed to join her. But she was right, they had a lot they wanted to get done today, plus he still had a surprise up his sleeve.

He was through his breakfast when she reappeared. She was dressed but toweling her wet hair. He stood and took the towel from her. "Leave it curly?" He asked.

She smiled and nodded. "Only if you help me brush it out later." She stood examining the living room. "Well, where do you want to start?"

"To be honest, I don't even have a clue." He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Her wet hair was soaking him but he didn't care.

"You are ruining your suit Tony."

"They're just clothes. This is more important."

She smiled and leaned into his embrace. "That is where I will start, getting your clothes arranged in the bedroom."

He nodded. "I'll go change, finish cleaning the kitchen and then join you."

* * *

They worked in tandem for several hours, slowed tremendously by a happy baby who wanted attention for most of the day. Tony had finally managed to move Ziva's small TV from the living room to the bedroom and set up his much larger flat screen and sound system in the living room.

Ziva sat on the bed and stared at the TV in chagrin. It was a compromise they had made but she still wasn't happy about it.

"Ziva, it's not that bad!" Tony promised.

She looked at him and eyed the TV suspiciously. "I do not understand why you need a television to entertain you in bed. Afraid I won't be enough Tony?"

He smiled and gulped as the temperature in the room jumped ten degrees. He waggled a finger at her. "You're trying to distract me."

She smiled but before she could reply there was a knock at the door. "That must be Abby."

She picked Jake up from the bed and walked to the door throwing it open and smiling delight when she saw that it was not only Abby, but the whole team plus Breena.

"Happy Mothers Day!" Abby yelled exuberantly which startled Jake. He began wailing pitifully against Ziva's shoulder.

She laughed and stepped back to allow everyone to enter all the while trying to soothe the baby. "Thank you. Shhhh….."

Gibbs stopped in front of her. "Has he been like that all day?"

Ziva shook her head. "No, he's been smiling all day." She lowered her voice. "I think it is Abby."

Gibbs smirked and gently kissed Ziva's cheek. "Happy Mother's Day Ziver."

She smiled at the gesture. "Please everyone sit. Tony and I have been unpacking all day."

Gibbs stopped and stared at the large TV now adorning the corner of the living room. "How did you manage that one DiNozzo?" He asked as the young man entered the room.

Tony smiled sheepishly. "Well… there wasn't much else we could compromise on." He admitted causing Gibbs to chuckle.

McGee ordered in food while everyone sat around exchanging stories, laughing and sharing time with the baby. Ziva was currently sitting on the couch, Jake in a seated position against her belly where he could listen to everyone in the room. At one point, Abby began to speak and Jake's head turning on her direction. Gibbs could've sworn that Jake's eyes narrowed in her direction before he began to fuss.

"I am going to give him a bottle. I have eaten a lot of spicy food today." Ziva whispered to Tony.

He nodded and stood. "I'll get it."

As Tony was heating Jake's bottle, Gibbs joined him in the kitchen. "How are you holding up DiNozzo?"

"I'm good. Really."

They discussed the possibility of going to buy a small freezer when another knock at the door surprised them.

Tony looked around the room and counted heads. There wasn't many more people it could be.

Tony opened the door and was surprised to find Amie there. "Amie, hey. Come in." He said allowing her to come through the door.

She paused momentarily when she saw the living room full of people. "Hi, sorry to interrupt but… can I talk to the two of you alone?"

Tony and Ziva exchanged a look before she nodded and stood. She handed Jake over to Palmer and gestured for Amie to follow them down the hallway.

"I wonder what that's about?" Abby asked.

McGee shrugged. "I hope everything is alright."

Once Amie entered the bedroom, Tony closed the door behind them.

"Is everything okay?" He asked Amie noting the harried look on her face.

She nodded and smiled softly. "I spent most of the day yesterday thinking about what we talked about."

Ziva who was sitting on the bed stood. "Do you mean about the sperm donors?"

Amie nodded. "You decided you didn't want me to pull the file. But.. I started thinking. And I realized that I've seen Tony in Jacob's face too." She sighed and pushed her coppery hair behind her shoulder before continuing.

"The only thing in my files is the donor's ID#. I'm not given names. That is all kept at the clinic. So.. I called in a few favors. Actually, a lot of favors since I interrupted the clinic director's Mother's Day Brunch. "

She reached into her bag and pulled out two files. "I just picked this up. This…. Is the file for the last donor."

Amie sat on the bed, Tony and Ziva sat next to her on either side. "See Ziva, this is your records for the last IVF procedure we did. Right here-" she pointed at the folder; "-this is the donor's ID number. 132560."

Tony and Ziva followed her finger and nodded, both feeling as if their throat was constricted to the point where they could barely breathe.

Amie closed the file in her lap and lifted another thinner one. "This is donor 132560's file from the sperm bank. I uh… I didn't open it to look." She handed the file to Ziva. "Bring it with you Tuesday."

Ziva stared at the folder in her hand almost as if it was poison.

Amie had stood and was exiting the room. "Amie?" Tony called. She stopped and turned.

"How much trouble can you get in for this?"

She smiled gently and shook her head. "It's better if you don't know."

Amie closed the door behind her. Ziva continued to stare at the folder.

"Well…." Tony said quietly.

"I uh… I feel like I am going to be sick." Ziva said quietly.

"Me too." Tony agreed.

She handed the folder to him with shaky hands. They stared at one another for several moments before Tony finally took a deep breath and opened the manila folder.

His face held no reaction for several moments. Suddenly, he dropped the folder on the floor and threw the bedroom door open running down the hallway.

Ziva glanced momentarily at the folder contents now lying on the floor and tore out of the room after him. She reached the living room in time to see a stunned team watch Tony rip Jake out of Palmer's arms and pull him to his chest.

Gibbs was shocked but jumped to his feet when he watched DiNozzo bury his tear stained face in the baby's downy hair.

Ziva had appeared right behind Tony, not noticing anyone else in the room but Tony and the baby. She'd stopped a few steps away.

"Tony?" She asked as tears openly ran down her face.

He turned in her direction but didn't loosen his hold on the baby. Finally she rushed forward and wrapped her arms around the two of them. Tony slipped his arm around her and pulled her in tight.

"Happy Father's Day" she whispered.

To Be Continued


	85. Chapter 85

**Hey guys, sorry about the long pause. I'm having a medical issue which makes it very difficult to type. So, keep your fingers crossed that my arm holds up. LOL**

**Again, thank you all for your notes, kind words, reviews, story alerts, etc. You all make me want to work on this story. Especially you ladies on Twitter LOL Wow, we're coming up on the 1 year anniversary of me publishing this and it's still going… I don't know if that's good or bad….**

**I also wanted to drop a note to all the TIVA authors out there. I'm HORRIBLE at leaving reviews for folks. I'm trying to get better but a lot of times I'm reading fics on my phone when I should be working etc. LOL So, if I have added you on a story alert or author alert, know that it means I'm interested in your story/writing. I'm working on getting better at reviews.**

**Now, this chapter is a little different. There's not a lot of Tony and Ziva in it, but it's another door that needed to be opened in order for our little family to truly heal. I promise another chapter later on that will be dripping with TIVA, and probably little Jake too. =D**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 85**

Abby and McGee joined Gibbs in staring at the scene in front of them. Tony had the baby on his shoulder, one hand holding him and the other wrapped around Ziva. Her head was half resting on the baby and half on Tony's shoulder. Neither of them was speaking a word, they were just absorbed in each other's presence.

Abby was afraid and looked to Gibbs for guidance. He wasn't sure what was happening, but knew that whatever was going on was major. He motioned silently with his hand for the team to follow quietly out the door.

Once everyone was in the hallway, he turned to close the door behind them believing that Tony and Ziva wouldn't even realize they were gone. He was surprised to see her face turn briefly towards him as she mouthed 'thank you' in his direction. He nodded and closed the door waiting for the onslaught he knew was coming.

"Gibbs, what the hell-?" Abby started. He stopped her immediately by placing his hands on her arms.

"I don't know Abby. But they'll share it with us if and when they're ready."

Abby wasn't pleased with the answer but began moving with the group down the hall. She silently entered the elevator and moved towards the back to allow everyone else in.

McGee watched her quietly for a moment. "You okay Abby?" He asked.

She crossed her arms. "It's just… so many things have changed. There was a time when we would all know everything going on in each other's lives. But now-"She trailed off.

Gibbs sighed. He knew this was coming and he'd been putting it off for a long time. He reached over and hit the stop button on the elevator and turned to address the team.

"You're right. Things have changed. That was one of my biggest fears and a big reason why I created Rule 12. With Tony and Ziva together in this relationship, nothing will ever be the same again."

Abby looked sadly at him. "I don't mean to sound selfish. I'm so happy for them. I'm glad they're together. But I never thought it would affect all of us-"

Gibbs leaned back against the wall and watched her momentarily. "How could it not Abs? "

She was quiet. McGee was the next to speak up. "Isn't that part of what being a family is all about? Adjusting and adapting to change? And being there for each other when change does happen?"

Gibbs smiled slightly and nodded. "We've definitely got a lot of change coming Tim. We have to share the bullpen with them when they come back to work."

Tim's brow furrowed as if he hadn't thought about it before. He looked up at Gibbs and nodded. "I'll stock up on my supply of Nutter Butter's boss."

Gibbs smirked and turned the elevator back on.

* * *

The following morning, Gibbs awoke and immediately reached for his cellphone.

The line only rang a couple of times before it was answered.

"Shalom." Came Rivka's voice.

"Hey. Have you talked to Ziva?" He asked her quickly.

"Not since Saturday. Why? Is something wrong?"

"I'm not sure." He briefly described the events that had transpired the night before.

"I- uh… I think I know what it was about." She replied cryptically.

"Something big by the sound of your voice-"Gibbs noted the emotion her words held.

"Yes. And definitely good news. I will explain to you later. I'm about to go into my meeting."

"Okay. I'll let you go then." Gibbs said not relinquishing the phone just yet.

He could hear the smile in Rivka's voice. "I have a few moments. "

He smiled. "How was your flight?"

She sighed. "Long. I am glad I don't fly back here to Israel too often."

"Will you be gone long?"

"No, I'll be leaving tomorrow."

Gibbs brow furrowed but he didn't say anything. "Okay. Be careful."

She chuckled. "Oh, I can take care of myself. I'll call you when I'm back at my hotel."

"Okay." He replied. He was unsure of what to say. 'Miss you' sounded presumptuous. 'Love you' was something neither of them was anywhere near ready to say or hear.

"Shalom." He said quietly.

"Shalom." She replied and ended the call. She turned back to the door in front of her and pushed them open with a flourish.

The man sitting at the desk looked up quickly. No one dared barged into his office like this. His eyes widened when he saw who it was.

"Rivka?" He asked quickly.

She stopped in front of him with a smirk. "Shalom Malachi. How have you been?" She spoke to him solely in Hebrew.

"Very surprised to see you here." He replied.

She nodded towards the large ornate wooden doors at the other side of his office. "Is he in?"

Malachi Ben-Gidon nodded. "Yes. How did you get in here without me being notified?

Rivka snorted. "Please. I just showed my ID and walked through the door. Apparently they know me well around here."

Malachi sat back in his chair. "I heard you made quite an impression here a couple of years ago."

Rivka's eyes dropped. "You were in Somalia at the time."

He nodded. "I was leading the teams trying to find-"His voice trailed off.

"Following orders as usual, yes?" Her eyes became steel as she leaned across the desk and glowered at him.

"You're lucky she's alive Malachi. If she had died in that hellhole, I would have found you."

"I tried to stop her-"

She interrupted him. "Not hard enough. You knew she shouldn't have been there to start with. You even told Eden that. But yet you never spoke up."

He stood from his desk indignantly. "She is a big girl. She can take care of herself."

Rivka shook her head and stepped back. "Not then she couldn't. It is truly heartwarming to see how her 'family' stepped forward when she couldn't."

With that, she spun and moved towards the doors, throwing them open with a loud thud.

Eli David looked up from the report he was reading. His anger dissolved to shock. "What is the meaning of this?"

Rivka smirked. "Hello love." Her tone was pure ice.

Malachi had rushed in behind her. "I'm sorry sir. No one informed me that she was here."

Eli chuckled and leaned back in his chair. "She is much like a storm. She moves fast and furious and will take down anything in her path."

Rivka didn't acknowledge Malachi's entrance into the room at all. She continued to glare at Eli.

Eli waved a hand in the air dismissing the agent. Malachi almost slunk from the room closing the door behind him.

"Ziva is very much like you." Eli commented to her.

She crossed her arms in front of her and snorted. "How would you know Eli?"

He dropped his pen on his desk and slid his glasses from his face. "I saw Ziva in America just two years ago-"

She stepped towards his desk angrily. "You SAW her, but did you TALK to her?"

Eli looked at her. His first instinct was to say that he did, but he knew the meaning behind her words. He also knew he couldn't hide the truth.

"No." He said quickly.

Rivka sighed. "Why Eli?"

He thought for a moment then stood, gesturing to the chairs. She moved over and sat, waiting for Eli to settle across from her before speaking again.

He sat and looked deeply into her eyes. "I take it that you and Ziva have fixed your relationship. Is she well?"

Rivka's smile was the answer to his questions. "She is wonderful."

"You have met our grandson?"

Rivka nodded. "He's beautiful Eli. She's so happy. I've never seen her like this. She has this energy that just emanates from her. It affects everyone around her. She's in love and such a wonderful mother. Jacob has the most wonderful smile."

"Jacob. That is his name?" He asked quietly.

"You didn't know? I thought you would have had her under surveillance." The snide comment came out before she could stop herself. "I'm sorry-"

He put up a hand and shook his head. "Don't be. There was a time… when she still worked for Mossad… that she was being watched. I saw our little girl slipping farther and farther away from me-"

"So you thought the best thing to do would be to 'bring her back into the fold'…" She commented after several moments of silence.

"It was my fault. She asked me to send her to America. She wanted to get away although she would never admit to it. I saw how much Ari's death had affected her. I thought… "

Rivka sat back in her chair and stared at him. "You were trying to protect her."

Eli shrugged. "It accomplished nothing but to pull her farther away. And then I started receiving photos back from the team watching her. She was spending time.. personal time with Anthony DiNozzo. When she needed help, she turned to Gibbs and NCIS, not Mossad. She stood next to me in my office and told Gibbs that she missed him. She used a tone of voice I'd never heard from her before. I knew I was losing her-"

Rivka's heart softened slightly. She knew the agony of having your baby out there somewhere, and not knowing how she was or what she was doing.

But the memory of the scared flesh on the same breast she was nursing her son from enraged her yet again.

"Yet when it all went to hell, she needed you… someone… ANYONE… to step up and love her you sent her Somalia…."

"I underestimated myself. I thought I knew her so well." His voice began to rise. "I thought that if I sent her on a mission she would remember who her true family was and it would ease the pain she was feeling-"

"Ease the pain? Eli do you have any idea what she went through? She-"

He jumped from his chair so quickly that it was knocked back several feet. "I know what they put her through!" He practically screamed at her. "How dare you insinuate that I do not!"

She'd never seen Eli react so vehemently. If it was another time and place she would be frightened. However, at this juncture, she believed that Eli needed this as much as she did.

"I sent all of my best teams to find her! Every time we got close Saleem would move his camp! But still he continued to taunt me. I lived through Ziva's torment more than you can imagine! I… when she wouldn't come back to Israel. I had to see for myself . When I went to America.. my reason was twofold."

"Yet you didn't speak to her about it-"

He shook his head. "I couldn't. She wasn't ready. I could see it in her eyes. When I looked at her I saw-"

"What?" She asked quietly.

He sighed and looked at her for several moments. He turned and moved towards the far wall, moving a photo and revealing a safe in the wall. He keyed in the combination, not caring that she could see.

Her breath choked in her throat. The combination was Ari, Ziva and Tali's birthdays.

He pushed a few items aside before pulling out two small plastic bags and a hard plastic case which held what looked like a CD. He closed the safe and came back over to the chair and sat heavily into the cushions.

"Shortly after she disappeared I received a small package. It was sent anonymously…" He held up one of the small bags. It held a large lock of dark brown hair. Rivka gasped realizing what it was.

"Th- that's Ziva's?" She whispered.

He nodded solemnly. "Our lab ran the DNA to be sure."

"Y- you said Saleem taunted you."

"This came next several days later. There was no note. There never was." He held up the second plastic bag which held a gold Star of David with a broken chain. Rivka gasped slightly. She'd given that to Ziva for her twelfth birthday.

"I didn't need tests to know it was hers." Eli said quietly. Rivka's stomach started to churn as Eli's earlier words rang through her head. 'I know what they put her through'.

She pointed at the CD in his hand. "Wh- what is that?"

"The last… 'gift'… I received before Gibbs put a bullet through his forehead." He said quietly.

She reached out a shaking hand and took the three items from him. "She… she's not dead Eli. She's more alive now than I have ever seen her. You have a chance to know her… and our grandson."

Eli was solemnly quiet for a period of time. "I fear it is too late."

Rivka shook her head. "No it's not. She's not the same person you sent to America all those years ago."

"You said she is in love. This man, he is good to her?"

Rivka nodded. "Her adores the air she breaths. And loves her son like his own."

Eli sat back again. "Anthony DiNozzo?" He asked.

He eyes him warily. "You know him."

Eli chuckled slightly. "I know him. He is a good man." He looked at her pointedly. "So is Gibbs."

She bulked slightly. "For Ziva I mean." He added quickly.

He smirked. "I see that I need to watch my rearview mirror more closely." She said in an off handed manner. Eli wasn't listening. He was staring at the plastic case still in her hand.

Rivka stood to leave. "Think about it Eli. One thing I have learned… it is never too late." she opened her bag and tucked the items away in it, not caring if Eli meant for her to keep them or not. She pulled something out and handed it to him.

"You have everything to gain." She said quietly before leaving the room.

Eli stared at the closed door for a few moments before turning over the paper she'd given him.

It was a photo of Ziva, lying back in the arms of Tony DiNozzo. She was smiling in a way he'd never seen before. Her head was turned slightly towards Tony who was kissing her forehead. Nestled securely in her arms was Jacob, looking adoringly up at his parents. Tony's hand was protectively over one of Ziva's and supporting the baby.

Eli used one finger to gently trace the small baby's features. He then traced Ziva's. He looked around his empty office and sighed heavily.

He stood and moved to his desk. He called out to Malachi's desk and instructed him to have his car brought around. Eli tucked the previous photo away securely in his belongings before gathering them and exiting the office.

Malachi eyed him suspiciously. "Heading home early sir? I don't remember you ever leaving before dinner time."

Eli nodded but didn't reply.

* * *

Once she'd returned to her hotel room, Rivka ordered room service. She was starving and now her time was all thrown off. She sat at the small table in her room and ate while staring at the items she'd taken from Eli.

Shoving her almost empty plate aside, she grabbed the CD and pulled out her laptop. Plugging it in and setting it up on the bed she popped in the CD. To her surprise, it wasn't a CD at all, it was a DVD.

The 'movie' started to play and she audibly gasped. She immediately recognized Ziva, although she didn't know what the dirty room was. Within seconds, the door was thrown open and a man marched in with several men behind him. Rivka began to tremble as tears streamed down her face when she saw the scene begin to play out.

This was a torture video. They actually recorded one of their sessions with Ziva. Rivka knew she should have turned the damn thing off but she couldn't. She covered her eyes by burying them in her crossed forearms. She suddenly heard Ziva begging, in English, Hebrew and Arabic.

"No!No!No!" she was begging over and over. Rivka was trembling and raised her eyes long enough to see a group of men tearing her baby's clothes off as Ziva struggled with them.

She couldn't take anymore and sprinted from the bed and into the bathroom just in time to empty the contents of her stomach into the toilet. She covered her ears to the horrid sounds of men cheering and yelling mixed with Ziva's cries and screams.

Feeling completely unsteady on her feet, she pushed herself up from her knees and went to stop the computer. She caught sight of the image on her small computer screen; Ziva lying naked, bloodied and broken on the floor as the laughing group of men left the room. The last to leave was one who had been sitting in a chair, watching the events in amusement.

That had to be Saleem.

As Rivka reached for her keyboard to stop the video, the scene changed again. 'Oh my god, no more no more.' Rivka begged. It was a different day, she could tell by the healing of Ziva's wounds. They had her tied to a chair by her feet and waist, her hands bound behind her. Two men had her by the hair and were forcing her mouth open. Saleem stood over her and began undoing the belt around his waist…

Unable to take anymore Rivka's fist shot out and struck her laptop, knocking it to the floor in a clatter. The DVD drive had popped open and dumped the offending DVD onto the floor next to it. Rivka covered her face with both hands and began rocking back and forth on the bed.

"Oh my God baby I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." She whispered, not caring that Ziva couldn't hear her.

She wiped her face. She didn't care that she was a mess. She snatched the DVD off the floor and put it back into its case. She threw it along with the two small bags into her purse and headed out the door.

* * *

Eli was sitting in front of a roaring fireplace staring at the photo Rivka had left him. Her heard the front door open and close but didn't turn to see his visitor. He knew that if she was able to get past his guards she wasn't there to kill him.

"I never thought I'd see you step foot in this house again." He said without turning around.

"When it comes to our daughter, I'll do what I have to do." Rivka replied.

He turned and looked into her eyes. He immediately knew she's watched the DVD. "You saw." It wasn't a question.

She pulled the DVD and bags out of her purse before going to sit next to him. "Some of it. I did not get very far."

Eli wiped his eyes. "I saw all of it. More than once. It killed me, disgusted me. But I had to look for a clue.. any kind of clue as to where they had her."

They both silently stared at the crackling fire. "Does she know about the DVD?"

Eli shook his head. "You and I are the only two people left alive that know about it. I could never tell her about it. I cannot be the one to bring that terror to her all over again."

Rivka fingered the items in her hands before handing them back to Eli. "Our baby girl is so strong to have survived that."

Eli nodded. "You know when I saw her at NCIS, she walked do strong and proud in front of me… I just wanted to reach out and pull her into my arms like when she was an infant. That woman I saw at NCIS and the woman on that DVD are not the same person. "

Rivka nodded. "Gibbs told me that he explained to her that the part of her that was the cold hearted killer, the assassin I fought so hard against and you fought so hard for…. That she died out there in that desert."

Eli nodded. "Looking at the picture, I would agree. This is the world I wanted for all of our children."

Rivka gestured at the evidence in his hands. "Ziva will never know about this. We, as her parents, will keep this to our graves."

He nodded and stood walking towards the fireplace. Both bags and the DVD went into the fire. He joined her again and they sat quietly and watched the plastic melt. Once the DVD itself was gone he picked up the photo of Ziva's family again.

"Perhaps… perhaps I could start with an e-mail?" He asked unsure.

Rivka smiled. "I'm sure she would appreciate that."

To Be Continued


	86. Chapter 86

**Oh! I forgot in the last chapter to give a shout out to the TIVA board at (not the new stupid Facebook one, the old one) I remember one time the idea of Saleem sending things to Eli to torment him came from a discussion there. I can't remember who it was and certainly couldn't go back through 11,000 pages (that's not an exaggeration) and find it. So, shout out to whoever it was that came up with the idea. It always stuck with me.**

**There's not really anything pertinent to this chapter except the M rating. LOL If it's not your type of thing, feel free to skip forward. =)**

**And now, on with the show….**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 86**

She didn't know how long they'd stood there clinging to the baby like a drowning man to a life preserver. Gibbs and the rest of the team were long gone and she didn't even think Tony realized.

The baby who enjoyed his group hug at first was starting to get anxious. He knew something big was happening with his Mommy and Daddy, he of course didn't understand what.

"Tony?" She whispered as the baby started to squirm.

He pulled his face back and looked at her.

She smiled gently. "Jake needs some air." She teased.

He chuckled slightly and looked down at the baby whose face was started to cross. "Oh hey hey, I'm sorry buddy. Don't be upset."

Tony let go of Ziva and brought Jake in front of him. The baby was happy at the change of position and gurgled up at his Father. He moved them to the sofa but held Jake where he was. Tony stared down at him in awe.

"My God Ziva, he's ours." He whispered.

She smiled. "I know."

He shook his head. "It's just… wow."

She chuckled. "He is pretty awesome, yes?"

"I just… how… whoever would have thought that me, a donation cup and thoughts of you would lead to this?" He cringed when the words came from his mouth but Ziva laughed heartily.

She slid her feet up under her and sat on her knees. She messed with his hair and leaned her face closer. "You thought of me while you…. donated?"

He grinned and blushed at the same time. "Alone in a room full of videos and magazines… and it was thoughts of my partner that did me in." He shook his head and looked down at the baby again.

Jake was nonplussed. He yawned and stretched his arms out wide. His parents smiled and watched him. Tony lifted one of his tiny hands and stared at it, stretching his fingers out and studying them.

"Do you think he'll have my hands?" He asked quietly.

She smiled. "He might. He definitely has your smile. And sometimes, he gets this look on his face and he looks just like you."

Tony smiled down at Jake. "Do you have my smile? Huh?"

Jake's face split into a big grin before he yawned again.

"Well, I think I have more teeth." Tony joked causing Ziva to grimace.

"Let us not think about teething. We barely survived his small bout of colic." She warned.

Tony nodded. "Good idea. " He continued to stare down at the baby but sighed. "I should put him down but I… I don't want to let him go."

Ziva smiled. "I felt like that when he was first born. The first time I held him… he was all wet and gross, screaming at the top of his lungs and I just loved him." Her expression turned a bit sad. "I wish you had been there."

Tony saw her face change. "Nut-uh, not me."

She looked at him in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"Well first, you probably would have shot me for getting your pregnant to start with. Then you would have broken my hand trying to squeeze this BIG guy out of that little space… and then seeing all the ickyness I probably would have passed out and cracked my head open on the way down. Nooo thank you!"

She knew he was teasing to lighten her mood but her eyes still filled with tears. "You would have been with me every second. And you would have loved it." She told him.

He smiled. "You're right. I love you so much… I would've let you break both my hands before I passed out."

She chuckled and leaned forward to grab a quick kiss. "I love you too. Here, let me put him down. Put on a movie, we can sit and relax."

He nodded and kissed the baby goodnight (hopefully) before Ziva disappeared down the hall with him. He heard the baby's door close and Ziva move into their room, presumably to change. He stood and went down to join her.

"Short or long film?" He asked.

"Long. I am not very sleepy tonight." She answered.

He nodded and went back to the living room to pick out a film. "Ah, perfect!" He said in triumph as he got the DVD set up.

She joined him a moment later wearing a T-shirt and pajama pants.

"All set?" He asked. She nodded and sat next to him on the couch. His arm immediately went around her and she leaned onto his shoulder as he hit 'play'.

Not far in the Director's cut of "The Abyss" Ziva turned her head and was staring at him. "What?" He whispered looking down at her.

She shook her head. "Nothing. I just.. I do not want to wake up from this dream. I feel like I have waited my entire life to be able to tell you that I love you, even before we ever met. Everything is so perfect now…"

"I love you like I never knew I could love someone. We've got this the rest of our lives. We've got our son. Nothing can break us apart." He whispered back.

Their lips met briefly before the passion built between them. Their tongues dueled for dominance before their need for air decided the battle for them.

She smiled and settled back against his shoulder. His hand was gently stroking her side near the hem of her shirt. She smiled to herself and took his hand in hers gently sliding it under her shirt to where she wanted it.

"Someone's feeling playful tonight." He commented as he gently stroked her right breast over her bra.

"Well, it is Mother's Day. You are supposed to be pleasing me today, yes?" She teased.

He smiled and leaned his head down capturing her lips once more as he slid his hand under her bra and stroked her breast. She hummed against his lips as his gently caresses moved to the other side. She sat up quickly grabbed the remote off of the table startling him.

"Enough of that." She said as she switched the TV and DVD player off. She pulled her shirt over her head and dropped it onto the floor before grabbing Tony and pulling him on top of her as she laid down on to the sofa.

He gladly obliged, expertly flicking open her bra and freeing her breasts for his perusal. He gently stroked one while kissing and sucking on the other, careful not to hurt her. He'd learned over the last few weeks how to tease her breasts without getting a mouthful of milk… most of the time.

Her eyes were closed and she squirmed a little beneath him. "Damn Ziva-" He muttered as her pelvis came into direct contact with his groin.

She smiled but didn't open her eyes. As Tony continued to tease her she did it again causing him to hiss. "If you keep doing that this won't last very long."

She opened her eyes as her smile was replaced with a pout. He laughed slightly and pulled her pouty lips against his. She allowed his tongue full entrance. This time it was him who rubbed against her which caused a hitch in her breath.

Her hands trailed over the muscles in his back and into the waistband of his sweat pants. She gently cupped his behind as her left foot began to slide up his leg.

He trailed kisses down her cheek and neck, catching the spot between her shoulder and neck that she loved. She muttered slightly when he found it and began to nip and tease, suckling the soft skin until her breathing sped up.

"Tony-" She whimpered.

"Yes?" He asked lifting his head up and looking into her eyes.

"Don't stop please!" She encouraged. Using her hands still on his ass, she pulled him tighter into her. Through the material of their clothes she could feel him beginning to harden. She started to work at the waistband of his pants before he stopped her.

"No. This is all about you." He told her gently.

There was that pouty look again. "Seeing you naked IS for me." She told him. He laughed and sat up.

"Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back."

He disappeared quickly down the hall. She thought about how ridiculous she probably looked, sprawled on the sofa with her shirt off and bra hanging open. Her lips were swollen from his kisses and she knew her hair was mussed.

Sitting up and slid her bra off her arms and dropped it onto the floor, not really caring at this moment. He reappeared moments later.

"Hey, I told you not to move." He warned.

She smiled and settled back against the cushions. "Sorry." She said in a tone that told him she really wasn't in the slightest.

He dropped onto the floor on his knees. "Sit up some." She looked at the excited but loving expression on his face and obliged. He leaned forward and captured her breast in his mouth again before trailing his lips down her stomach.

Heat immediately sprang to her nether area when she realized what he was intending to do. His fingers hooked into her pajamas pants as he started to slide them from her hips.

"No panties Ziva?"

She shrugged noncommitedly. "They interfered with my plans." She pointed out causing him to laugh.

She picked her bottom up long enough for him to remove her pants. He sat back on his heels, marveling at the beautiful naked creature on display in front of him.

"My God you are beautiful." He whispered to her causing her cheeks to flush.

He was suddenly in front of her again catching her lips with his. She returned his earlier favor, trailing her lips down his cheek to that spot right behind his ear that always set him off. She grazed it gently with her teeth causing Tony to shiver.

His teased her breasts some more before begining his earlier path down her stomach. His lips were suddenly on her right knee. He gently lifted her leg and kissed the inside part of her knee which caused her to whimper.

He smiled. Another spot to put into his memory banks. He trailed his lips up the inside of her thigh almost to the apex of her legs. She slid her leg over his shoulder and pulled her left leg up, throwing it over the arm of the sofa.

His brows raised at her boldness. "What do you want Ziva?" He teased her quietly.

"Tony.. please…" She begged.

He smiled and placed his hands on her hips, encouraging her to move down a few inches. He gently brought his hand towards her heat, using one finger to separate her nether lips and begin stroking her.

She whimpered again as her body involuntarily tried to push herself into his touch.

He stopped stroking for a moment until she was calmer. He began again only this time, leaning forward and following his finger with his lips.

She purred in anticipation. Her head was thrown back and her eyes closed. A satisfied smile was gracing her features.

His tongue flicked at her clit which caused her to body to jump. He raised his head to make sure it was an involuntary response and not Ziva flinching from his touch. Her expression hadn't changed, so he continued his ministrations.

Her head moved from side to side as he moved from her clit and lapped at her core. His fingers reached her opening and gently traced the faint scar that was there from giving birth to Jake. He dipped his tongue into her causing her to moan loudly as her breath hitched.

"Oh-Tony-" She mumbled before he did it again.

She was breathing heavier and her hips rocked into his mouth slightly.

He sat back slightly. "Do you like that Ziva?"

She opened her eyes and lifted her head from the sofa. "Uh huh." Was all she could muster.

"Should I continue?" He asked teasingly. She didn't reply but wrapped her hands in his hair and pushed his face towards her core again.

He laughed before his tongue touched her clit again. Her hip movements started to increase so he pulled back again to watch her.

Her head was thrown to the side and she was biting on her bottom lip. He reached for the bottle he'd grabbed from the bedroom and poured some of the liquid onto his fingers.

Ziva was seeing stars behind her eyelids when he gently sucked her clit between his exquisite lips again. She mumbled in a mix of languages she wasn't even sure. Suddenly she felt him using his fingers to trace her opening.

She opened her eyes and looked down at him. He felt her change postition and looked up to her, not moving at all.

She was biting her lip again but the smiled gently and nodded. He slipped one well lubricated finger gently into her. He watched her reaction closely as he slid it out and back in. Her hips thrust slowly into his touch again. The Mona Lisa smile was back on her face.

His lips found her again, gently working her clit until every exhale came as a moan. He inserted a second finger into her as his lips gently pulled at her clit causing her entire body to tremble. He was working his fingers at a steady pace as his lips continued to work at her bundle of nerves.

Her hip movements were becoming erratic. He used his free hand to place on her hip to steady her. She found his rhythm and began to grind against his fingers as they continued their pace.

His free hand moved forward and captured her breast, gently increasing the pleasure coursing through her body.

She felt a coil within her begin to tighten. Tony noted her legs begin to tremble. He removed his lips but continued with his fingers.

"Let go baby." He implored her.

She couldn't respond but shook her head, blindly reaching her hand out for him. He took her hand in his and realized that was what she was looking for.

His gently leaned down and used his lips to envelop her clit again. A few gentle flicks of his tongue and her body released like a broken spring.

"Tony!" She yelled as the endorphins flooded through her body. As she started to come down from her high she opened her eyes and sighed in contentment as he removed his fingers.

She wound her hands into his hair again after allowing her jellied leg to drop to the floor. She pulled him up onto the couch and grabbed his lips with hers, tasting herself still on him.

"Pro-" She panted causing him to smile.

"Yes Zee-vah?" He teased.

"Promise me you will do that a lot." She finally managed to say causing him to laugh.

He kissed her again. "Whenever you want. Just say the word."

She nodded and smiled making his laugh again. He bent to the floor and grabbed the other item he'd retrieved from the bedroom. "I have something for you."

She smiled and pulled herself back to a sitting position on the couch. Tony held a small box out to her wrapped with a blue ribbon tied into a bow at the top.

"Tony, what did you do?" She asked taking the box from him and studying it.

He watched her closely, loving the fact that she was sitting in their living room completely nude and not bothered in the slightest by it.

"Happy Mother's Day." He said encouraging her to open the box.

She slipped the ribbon off and opened it slowly. She gasped and opened the box wider. "Oh my God Tony, it is beautiful."

She slipped the necklace from the velvet lined box and studied it closely. The long silver chain glittered in the soft light of the room. She looked at the charm at the end and her eyes became misty.

It was a woman's hand outstretched with a small child's hand resting on it. One small stone adorned each hand, Ziva's birthstone on the Mother's hand and Jacob's on the child's hand.

"This is amazing-" She whispered to him. "Put it on me, please?"

He took the chain from her and waited for her to turn around. He gently slid her hair aside and replaced her Star of David necklace.

"Gorgeous." He responded staring at the necklace that hung to her bare chest. She leaned forward and kissed him again. "Thank you so much."

He blushed. "I'm glad you like it."

She shook her head. "I love it, just like I love you. "

She took his hands in hers. "Come on… come to bed. " She tugged gently at his hands. He gladly followed her down the hallway and watched as she climbed under the covers. He slipped off his sweats and shirt and started to climb in.

She was watching him with her head resting on her hand. She simply cocked an eyebrow at him. He stopped and smiled, slipping off his boxers and climbing naked into bed with her.

Ziva cuddled against his shoulder, tossing one of her legs over his. "I thought you weren't tired?" He asked her.

She chuckled. "I am a little. Besides, we should rest up."

Tony thought for a moment. "What is that?"

"Because the moment you get off that phone call with your doctor you are all mine." She commented idily.

He laughed and kissed the top of her head. "I can't wait."

To Be Continued….


	87. Chapter 87

**Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed, added story alerts, author alerts etc for this story. I know a lot of TIVA fans are down about the show, and trust me I feel ya. I thought I had it all figured out and was so excited and then poof, a shot to the gut and now I'm down about it again. ::sigh:: At this point, I'm not even sure that I'm going to make it to the end of the season. I feel like I owe it to Cote and Michael to continue to watch, but at the same time I don't want to give TPTB the satisfaction of knowing that I'm still watching even though they're giving us the same drivel over and over. Are dare I mention how they're writing Ziva? Ugh.**

**I wanted to put a dedication here to someone special. I won't name her, but she'll know who she is. She's a TIVA fan and of course, MW and CdP fan. I've never met her in person, or even spoken to her over the phone with the exception of text messages. Yet, she reached out to me with such an incredible act of kindness that I'm still stunned, just because she could. She didn't have to, she wasn't asked to. But because of the kindness in her soul she did. At a time when I'm stressed about my medical issues, and even more so completely and overly stressed out by my job, she completely restored by faith that there are still kind and caring human beings out there. And although she's currently pessimistic about the route TIVA is going as well, I will always call her a friend. {{hugz}} to her.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 87**

Ziva stood up straight after putting several loud kisses on Jake's bare belly. She began buttoning his jumper up and smiling down at him as he waved his arms and legs wildly.

"Someone is happy today." Tony commented from the door of the nursery.

Ziva placed her hands on Jake to steady him on the changing table and turned to Tony throwing him a smile over her shoulder. She didn't reply but at this point in their relationship, she didn't need to.

He entered the room and wrapped his arms around Ziva from behind placing a kiss on her cheek before looking down at the baby. Jake stared up at his parents with an amused look on his face.

"And he's happy too." Tony joked as Ziva leaned back into him and sighed deeply.

"Mommy loved that fact that he only woke up one time during the night to nurse." Ziva murmured.

Tony kissed the side of her head. "You're getting closer and closer to sleeping through the night, aren't ya?" He asked the baby who continued watching them.

Ziva smiled and turned slightly to look at him kissing him heartily on the lips. "Good morning by the way. Thank you for yesterday. Everything was so amazing."

"Everything?" He questioned. At another point in their relationship, that question would have been taken as a lecherous joke, a way of Tony reminded her of what they'd done the night before.

However, despite the slight smile on his face, she could read in his eyes what he was really questioning. She turned into his arms allowing Tony to place a hand on the baby. She touched his cheek gently and stared into his soul for several moments.

She raised onto her tiptoes and kissed his lips softly. "Everything." She repeated.

He sighed slightly and smiled. "I'm glad." Tony knew that they had pushed things farther last night than they ever had. Although they had participated in oral sex in the past, he'd never pushed so far as to enter her, even with his fingers.

But she hadn't hesitated at all. As a matter of fact, Tony felt like he was more hesitant than she was.

"I am glad too. To be honest, I was not sure how I would react. I mean…-" Her face suddenly blushed furiously. "I have had… exams and such, especially during the In vitro and while I was pregnant. But Amie was so patient.. and she still is. Just the other day during my postpartum exam I started to feel uncomfortable and I flinched. But her touch is so comforting, and she got me to talk about you which distracted me from what she was doing. But your touch has never brought that need to protect myself." Her brows knit momentarily as If she was confused before her face relaxed and she smiled.

Tony smiled back at her. "If I ever make you feel uncomfortable Ziva just tell me. Don't try to force anything that could make the situation worse. It would destroy me if you ever looked at me with any fear in your eyes."

"I will. But Tony please, do not worry so much." A loud sigh from the changing table next to them drew their attention. Tony chuckled and scooped Jake into his arms.

"Oh I'm sorry. Were you tried of not being the center of attention?"

Ziva kissed both of her boys on the cheek before turning towards the door. "We have leftovers from yesterday. I will heat them up."

"Has he nursed yet?"

She shook her head. "He just ate about two hours ago."

Tony nodded and followed her out of the room. Ziva busied herself in the kitchen while Tony played with Jake in the living room. Once the microwave was humming and their plates began to fill with the warmed food she leaned across the kitchen counter and watched Tony with Jake.

He was studying Jake's hands again, almost as if the fact that Jake was biologically his hadn't set in yet. She came up behind the couch and put her hands on Tony's shoulders. "Breakfast is ready." She whispered into his ear.

After breakfast, they'd managed to unpack a few more boxes from the guest room. At least there was a path to walk through the room now. Gibbs had called around lunch and told Tony that he was picking Rivka up at the airport. He'd explained that she'd sounded a bit desperate to see Ziva so he'd bring her by in his truck and they could go out shopping for a freezer.

Tony had to grin to himself. Today was a work day Gibbs was running errands which of course meant that he'd taken the day off of work or was leaving early.

Ziva had called Eden and together they were going to go through Josh's stuff that was left in the spare room. Although Tony had gotten close to Josh before his death their relationship was nowhere near as tight as the childhood friends. Ziva was looking forward to spending the time with Eden. There just weren't enough hours in the day for her to accomplish everything she wanted to do. And starting next week, she had to start back to work although it would be from home. It made her sad to think that her maternity leave was half gone already.

Eden had arrived right after Jake had gone down for his afternoon nap. Ziva was settled in the living room and pumping breast milk which caused Eden to cringe.

"Yet another reason I never want children. You will never find me hooked up to a machine like THAT!" She exclaimed causing Ziva to smile.

"It is really not that bad once you get used to it." She commented. Tony was straightening up the kitchen from breakfast and brought her a large glass of ice water which she greatfully accepted.

"You have to drink extra fluids when you're breast feeding." She explained to Eden.

Eden in turn shook her head. "No thanks. " Ziva smirked and laid her head onto the back of her seat. "The day may come when you change your mind."

Once she'd made the comment she suddenly felt like someone had kicked her in the stomach. She was positive that once Eden found out about Josh's secrets she would rejoin Mossad and be gone.

The washing machine finished so Tony moved to get the wet clothes from there to the dryer. Eden watched in amusement. "My, isn't he domesticated."

Ziva smirked again. "We have to do chores in the free moments that we have."

Tony got the dryer started and came into the living room to sit with the two women. "Okay, Gibbs picked your Mom up about 45 minutes ago so they should be here soon."

Eden shook her head. "I can't believe your Mom is sleeping with your boss."

Tony cringed. "Please, don't put that image in my head." He begged.

Ziva laughed. "I do not know. They seem content. They are not overly affectionate with one another around us. I guess it is okay."

Tony shuddered.

Ziva turned off the breast pump shortly after. She unhooked the bottles and handed them to Tony who expertly took them to the kitchen, divided up the milk, 'bagged and tagged' it, and placed it into their jammed freezer.

"Yeah, Gibbs and I definitely cannot come home until I find a freezer. Are you sure you'll have room for it in there?" He asked gesturing towards the spare bedroom.

Ziva was hooking her bra and straightening her shirt but nodded. "Yes. As a matter of fact, we should go get started." She told Eden as she finished with her clothes.

Eden nodded and stood. Ziva finished her water and put the glass into the dishwasher. "Do you want my help?" Tony asked.

Ziva shook her head. "No, relax for a while." She said with a smile.

Eden opened the door and gaped. "How are you and Tony going to fit all of his stuff in this apartment?' she asked looking at the stacked boxed.

Ziva shrugged. "We have no idea. We decided that we will just work on a box or two as time goes on."

They decided to start with the easy stuff, the photos spread throughout the room. They gathered all of them onto the bed and sat side by side, laughing and reminiscing over the moments captured in the snapshots.

Ziva had tried several times to broach the subject of Josh's scheme, but kept backing away from it. Finally, knowing she couldn't stall any longer, she just blurted it out.

Eden stared at her expressionless for several moments. Finally, she smiled and scooted back until she was sitting against the headboard of the bed. She stretched her long legs out and crossed them at her ankles.

"I already know Ziva." She said quietly.

Ziva eyed her suspiciously. "What? How did you know? Did Josh tell you?" She demanded.

Eden shook her head. "No, nothing like that. It just… didn't feel right that the doctor was telling me that my leg would never fully heal, but I was having no pain, numbness, soreness… nothing. So, I went to a doctor here that told me I was misdiagnosed. I didn't know anything about Josh being involved until your Mother came to see me."

Ziva eyes her carefully. "She did?"

Eden nodded. "She wanted to take the burden off of you. She even brought me the cancelled checks Josh had given to the doctor."

Ziva looked down at the bed spread. "So… I guess this means you are rejoining Mossad?"

They were quiet for a moment before Eden answered. "Yes."

Ziva's shoulders dropped but before she could reply Eden reached out and touched her arm. "But not in the capacity you think."

"Officer Bashan is over worked at the embassy. And Eli seems to think that Mossad has been.. lacking.. a liaison officer here in the United States since you resigned. I'll be taking the position at the embassy."

Ziva's face began to come alive. "No field work?"

Eden shook her head. "Possibly some traveling. But no field work."

Ziva couldn't help but jump forward and pull Eden into a hug that Abby would be proud of. "Oh thank God." She whispered to her friend.

They separated and Eden shrugged. "What can I say? I guess I've caught that bug of wanting to settled down and find something permanent."

Ziva grinned. "But the someone you want is not here."

Eden shook her head. "He'll never get his head out of Eli's ass Ziva. "

Ziva sighed. "The two of you have been more on and off than a light switch." She acknowledged.

They heard a knock on the door in the living room and realized that Gibbs and Rivka must have arrived. Ziva had just stood to go into the living room to greet them when Rivka came breezing quickly into the room. She immediately reached for Ziva and pulled her tightly into her arms.

"Oh my beautiful girl." She murmured into Ziva's hair.

Ziva gladly embraced her but was thoroughly confused. "What's wrong Mother?" She asked.

Rivka let her go and pulled away, brushing her hair back slightly before touching her cheek. She seemed ready to say something but stopped. "Nothing… I'm just glad that I am home."

Ziva smiled. "I am glad that you are home too. I have something important to tell both of you.. and Gibbs."

She was almost childlike when she reached out and grabbed Eden's hand. She pulled her off the bed and grabbed Rivka, dragging both of them to the living room.

"Ziva, what are you doing?" Eden asked her in Hebrew while she stumbled along behind her friend.

"It is important!" Ziva insisted.

Tony smiled when the three women entered the room. Ziva was just alive with energy. He'd never seen her like this before. She was just alive with lightheartedness.

Once in the living room she released their hands and gestured to the couch so they could sit.

Rivka was watching her in amusement and once seated turned to Gibbs who was watching with a raised brow. "Jethro, have you met Eden yet?"

He didn't acknowledge one way or the other, instead merely nodding in her direction.

Eden appreciated the aloofness and returned the gesture.

Rivka watched as Ziva went to Tony and whispered something between the two of them. He smiled brightly and suddenly she was on him, kissing him like both of their lives depended on it. Eden smiled and Gibbs glared, but Rivka certainly knew him well enough to read what that twinkle in his eyes meant.

She led Tony over to where everyone was sitting and pushed him onto the couch, smiling slightly at the memory of what had gone on in that very spot just the night before. She sat next to him and took his hands.

"We- have something very important to tell all of you." She announced.

"Oh God, Tony you didn't knock her up already did you?" Eden asked with a smirk.

Both Tony and Ziva chuckled. But before Gibbs could respond he paused when he noticed Rivka's eyes filled with tears. Within seconds they were spilling down her cheeks.

Ziva noticed too and the smile dropped from her face. "Mother?" She reached out and placed a hand on Rivka's knee.

Rivka smiled and shook her head while quickly wiping her face. "I'm sorry. I'm just tired from the trip." She hated lying to her, especially after the rebuilding they'd done on their relationship. But what else could she do? Tell her about the DVD Eli had given her? Describe how, even after she had run from the room and into the bathroom, she could still hear the screams from her baby girl as a group of terrorists brutally gang raped her?

"Please please, don't worry about me. Tell us what has made you so happy today!" Rivka implored. She looked to Gibbs already feeling his blue eyes trying to read her mind. Sure enough, they were locked on her. She swallowed the lump in her throat again and nodded her head slightly. 'Later'. Her gaze told him. He acknowledged with barely movement of his head and turned his attention back to Ziva.

"Well, Mother brought to my attention that Joshua may have been a little less than truthful in his dealings with both Eden and I."

Gibbs sat back in his chair, his face expressionless.

"Eden had taken a gunshot to the leg. He paid off one of Mossad's doctors to say that she would never be able to go back into active duty again. We can only assume that Josh was trying to protect her."

Eden snorted. "Josh always hated our work with Mossad. He hated the danger we were in."

"And the things it made us do." Ziva commented offhandedly.

Eden pursed her lips and nodded.

"We can assume that Josh saw the opportunity and took it. He wanted Eden safe and happy. " Ziva continued.

Gibbs sat forward and placed his hands on his knees. "What else?"

"Apparantely, Josh was dishonest with me as well. When I was in Miami during the Reynosa case, he came down to see me, so we could spend time together. He wanted to see for himself how well I'd recovered from Somalia."

Rivka shifted in her seat.

Ziva's brow furrowed at her Mother's odd behavior but she continued. "Josh proposed the idea of having a baby then. He told me he wanted a chance to be a Father in case his cancer came out of remission. He knew that I wanted children, and a family. He also knew what my feelings were for Tony, and that I led myself to believing that Tony did not return my feelings. I did not think I would find anyone in my life that I loved like I do him. Josh knew this, and wanted me to find some happiness. So the idea was born. "

She paused for a moment. "What Josh did not tell me was that by the time he had come to Miami, he already knew his cancer was back. He used my want of a child to try and give me some of what I always wanted before he died."

Tony put his arm around her shoulder. "So after weeks of thinking about it, and even more belief that Tony and I stood no chance of being anything more than friends, I agreed. We picked out the in vitro candidates and after the few attempts did not work, I had basically given up hope. We knew that it was a big shot anyway."

Tony smiled softly. "Long shot." He corrected.

She nodded and reached out to pick up a small yellow stuffed toy from the coffee table. Tony had been using it earlier to tickle Jake's belly.

"We agreed to one more try and that was all. My heart just could not take any more disappointment. Josh sensed this and volunteered to do all of the groundwork, including picking the donors. He showed me the three he'd narrowed it down to. I saw their photos. Well, we all know how that last time turned out." She said with a small smile.

"What I did not know was that apparentely Josh tricked me. He went to the clinic by himself to sign the paperwork and choose the donor. I do not know how he found out… perhaps he asked to look at more candidates-" Her voice trailed off.

Eden sat forward. "What did he do?"

Tony picked up the story. "Somehow, he discovered that I'd donated at that very clinic several years ago. We're guessing that maybe he was looking through the donors and saw me, I don't know. We'll never know without being able to ask Josh."

Eden's hands shot to her mouth. "Oh my God, Tony?"

He and Ziva both smiled brightly. "Yeah." He said proudly.

Eden surprised everyone and started laughing. "It would figure that YOUR sperm would be what she needed."

Tony and Ziva laughed but stopped when Gibbs sat back in his chair smiling. "That would explain what happened yesterday… as if your relationship wasn't strange enough."

They laughed again but stopped at the solemn look on Rivka's face. Ziva became concerned.

"Mother?" She reached out and touched her arm.

Rivka smiled but it didn't quite reach her face. "I'm happy for the two of you Ziva, really I am."

"What is wrong?" Ziva asked her in Hebrew in case it was something she didn't want Tony or Gibbs to know.

Rivka sighed. "You said that 'it was a long shot'. Why? Why was it a long shot?" She asked switching back to English.

The smile fell from Ziva's face. "I…" Her voice faltered. "I may be unable to conceive naturally. Amie did not even know if the In Vitro would work."

Rivka's face softened. "Is it because of Somalia?"

Ziva nodded. Her eyes met Gibbs when she heard his breath hitch. Tony's hand was immediately on her back rubbing small circles in support.

"I wish those damn monsters weren't dead. I'd kill every one of them myself." Eden spat out.

Tony shook his head. " You'd have to get into a very long line to do that." He commented.

Ziva shook her head. "No, please. All of you are some of the most important people in my life. I do not want you filled with anger or disgust because of what happened to me. The situation got out of control. No one forced me onto that mission. I marched into Saleem's camp knowing the danger I faced. I could have said 'No'. Malachai did. But yet I went."

Eden shook her head. "Ziva, please don't tell me that you think what happened to you was justified?" The anger was evident in her voice.

Ziva shook her head. "At the time I did. Even for a short time after I was rescued I believed it. Part of it was my own jumbled thoughts and emotions. Part of it was Saleem's torture."

The word 'torture' made everyone in the room shift uncomfortably… except for Ziva.

She suddenly sat up proudly and leaned back against Tony who allowed his arm on her shoulder to drop down and wrap around her waist. She looked at their three guests with a small smile on her face.

"I marched into that camp filled with hatred. I wanted to die there. Even if I had not been captured I may have still killed myself in one way or another. I was in that bad of a place. "

She allowed her words to sink in.

"I was drugged, beaten and tortured just in the first few days I was there. Then came the gang rapes and the sexual abuse and assault. Shortly after I gave up fighting. I would just lay there and let those animals do what they wanted. I would not even whimper. They would leave me naked and bleeding and still I would not fight. I realized I was pregnant and shortly after Saleem did too. He… beat me until it caused me to miscarry. They gave me no medical treatment at all. He sent a few men in to clean me up with a bowl of dirty water. His men were not allowed to touch me again after that. I was still raped during Saleem's interrogations, but it was by whatever he had handy. One of his favorite objects was the handle of the knife he always wore at his waist. He would rape me with the handle and then threaten to cut my throat with the blade. "

"This is why you can't conceive?" Rivka asked softly. She knew some of this already, although Ziva wasn't aware of that. But Rivka couldn't help but notice Ziva's posture.

Ziva nodded. "When I was rescued, there was a massive infection and scarring. Amie did what she could but…"

Rivka looked over at Gibbs who had a haunted look on his face. She turned back to her daughter. "I know-"

Ziva's brown furrowed. "You know what?"

Rivka sighed. "Last week, you were breastfeeding and I saw the scar on your breast. It looked like a bite mark. I drew my own conclusions."

Ziva looked down and nodded.

"And I have my own confession to make." Rivka admitted. "When I went to Israel, it wasn't for a business meeting. I went to confront your Father."

Ziva stiffened slightly at the mention of Eli. However, all of their attention turned to Eden when she laughed heartily.

"Sorry. But Rivka… please tell me that you stormed through Mossad headquarters like you did the last time?"

Rivka smiled sheepishly. "They barely tried to stop me at the front door."

"Malachai told me that he'd just arrived back from Africa and was trying to stop you from bursting through Eli's door. He said you knocked him on his ass."

Rivka smiled more proudly this time. "He was literally standing in front of Eli's door. I needed to get THROUGH that door. I didn't care if his arm was in a sling or not."

Everyone in the room smiled, including Gibbs who had no doubt that Rivka tore through Mossad headquarters like a hungry lion chasing raw meat.

"This meeting was a bit more… subdued. But I had to talk to him. I had to hear it from his own mouth." She confessed.

Ziva smiled sadly. "He and I have never spoken of it."

Rivka nodded. "I know. He told me. He's proud of you Ziva. He's proud of everything you have accomplished. He might be reaching out to you soon."

Ziva was quiet for a moment but then nodded. "I think… I think I might like that. "

"I'm not a shrinking little flower Ziva. When I saw the scar I figured out some of what happened to you."

Ziva's hand unconsciously traveled to her scarred breast. "That scar is the one that mocks me every day. The others… I know they are there but I do not have to see them."

"How many are there Ziver?" Gibbs asked quietly, his voice a bit strained.

Ziva's eyes dropped and she was suddenly quiet. It was Tony who took the initiative. He sat forward and turned Ziva to face him, her back facing the others in the room. They lost themselves in each other's eyes before he leaned forward to kiss her first on the forehead, then her nose, and then softly on her lips. He rested his forehead against her while reaching down and beginning to unbutton her shirt.

She didn't fight, instead leaning tighter against him. When her shirt was almost opened, he whispered. "You are so beautiful and strong. I love you so much."

She felt him slip her shirt from one arm and moved it to cover her front. Her back was now exposed for their extended family to see. She wrapped both arms around Tony's and buried her face in his neck.

Gibbs stomach rocked at the sight of her marred skin. Eden but her bottom lip having seen the scars before. Rivka inhaled sharply but leaned forward, gently touching Ziva's back with her hand.

"Well, these aren't that bad at all Ziva. " She heard Ziva sniff against Tony's skin and watching as his arms immediately tightened against her.

"As a matter of fact, a lot of these may continue to fade and disappear." Rivka commented.

Gibbs leaned forward and nodded. "I agree Ziver. Most of them you can barely see."

Rivka had just moved her hair from her shoulder and smiled softly. "Well, except this one. But I don't think that is from Somalia-" She said with a lilt in her voice.

Tony looked at where she was gesturing and blushed furiously. "Oh, whoops."

Ziva lifted her tear stained face and looked at him closely. "Whoops what?"

He smiled sheepishly and she suddenly remembered his lips working on that spot the night before. "Oh my God!" She buried her face in his neck again, this time in embarrassment.

Rivka laughed and patted her shoulder. "Well, it is good to know you two are enjoying yourselves even with the newborn in the house."

Tony smiled and kissed the top of Ziva's head. He pulled her shirt back around and helped her slip it back on. Once she had it buttoned enough that she wasn't exposed she turned back to face them.

"Even… even with these scars, there is one thing I can tell you."

Rivka sat back in her seat. "What is that?"

Ziva sat up straight and proud again.

"I won. I beat all of them Mama. I may be scarred. I may have nightmares from time to time. But look at my life now. …." She gestured around the room before placing her hand on Tony's cheek.

"Saleem may have had me down. But he didn't win. " She smiled and shook her head proudly. "Not even close."

Rivka reached out and pulled Ziva to her while reaching out a hand and taking Tony's. Gibbs felt his entire body swell with pride. Suddenly, it became too much and he stood quickly.

"I'm uh… I'm going to check to space for the freezer." As he started to leave the room Tony turned.

Gibbs waved him off wordlessly. Rivka watched him leave the room and pulled away from Ziva. "I'll be right back." She whispered and kissed her on the forehead.

She followed Gibbs into the spare bedroom and found him sitting solemnly on the bed. She closed the door behind her and sat next to him.

"What is it?"

He turned his wet eyes in her direction. "I could've stopped that from happening to her. She was standing right in front of me screaming for help and… I thought tough love was the way to handle it."

Rivka put an arm around his shoulders. He continued. "If I had just made her sit and talk to me… or grabbed her arm and forced her on to the plane home… she wouldn't have been-" His voice choked and suddenly he was reaching for her.

They wrapped around one another and cried together. One mourning the daughter she thought she'd lost, the other mourning the daughter he'd lost and gained again. Both of them humbled by the daughter she'd survived to become.

To Be Continued


	88. Chapter 88

**Wow, I just realized that we passed the one year anniversary of this story. Yikes! And it still goes on… and I am absolutely humbled by those of you who are still reading. I hope it continues to live up to everyone's expectations.**

**And to all my buddies on Twitter who not only make me laugh but bring brightness to my crappy work days. I love it when we all break into Tiva Talk. And of course… EvilAldea posting her secret conversations she had with Ziva regarding Ray and his… inadequacies in the bedroom. g**

**Please remember the rating folks. This story is "M" for more than one reason.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 88**

While Gibbs and Rivka were behind closed doors, Tony took the opportunity to turn to Ziva and pull her into his arms. She gladly obliged and sunk into his warmth.

"I'm so proud of you." He whispered and kissed her on the head.

She tightened her embrace and sighed contentedly. "It is because of you. Just weeks ago I could barely face my nightmares. And now… I feel like parts of me that were broken no longer are. You have helped me start to feel whole again."

He pulled back slightly and touched her cheek. "The pieces were all there. I just helped nudge them back together." He said modestly.

She smiled but before she could speak Gibbs and her Mother emerged from the bedroom. His face was stoic and held no expression.

"Alright DiNozzo, get your hands off of her and let's get this show on the road."

Tony looked at Ziva reluctantly. He bent and kissed her quickly before letting her go. He'd barely taken three steps when his cellphone rang.

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Anthony Dinozzo." He barked into it.

Ziva saw his body language change. He stiffened slightly before replying to whoever was on the other end. "Yeah. "

He paused again allowing the other person to speak. "I understand. Thank you." He said before disconnecting the call.

"Sorry Boss." He said to Gibbs before he turned back and looked at Ziva. "It was the Doctor's office. My test results came back a day early. Everything is okay." He said softly.

Ziva felt her stomach flutter slightly but she smiled at him and nodded. Tony hated having to leave at that moment. He felt the need to assure her that there was no pressure and that he would wait forever for her.

But Gibbs' shuffling from foot to foot reminded him that it wasn't a good idea. "I'll see you later?" He said to Ziva almost as a question.

She nodded. "We will be here."

* * *

Once out in Gibbs' truck Tony watched the scenery pass on their way to Home Depot. He turned to Gibbs who was especially quiet.

"Are you okay Boss?" Tony asked.

Gibbs looked at him but bit back the first smart remark that came to his mind.

"Yeah." He said instead.

Tony looked out the front window for a few moments before turning to him again. "Was it the scars?"

"It was a bit of a shock. " Gibbs acknowledged.

Tony nodded but smiled softly. "I'm so proud at how strong she's become. Just weeks ago I had to beg her to show me what Saleem had done to her. And now she's able to show them to her loved ones.. like proof of what she's overcome."

Gibbs glanced at the wistful smile on the younger man's face. "I'm damn proud of you Tony. You've grown so much since that baby was born. I have no doubt that your love and support has helped her heal."

He angled the truck into the parking lot and killed the engine before Tony replied. "I feel so much for her and Jake. I hate being away from them even if it's just for a few minutes. I thought it would wear off but-"

Gibbs smiled. "It never wears off DiNozzo. When it does is when you have to worry."

* * *

Hours later the two men returned home and hoisted their purchase up to Tony and Ziva's apartment. Tony opened the apartment door to the smell of food and female laughter coming from the spare bedroom.

Gibbs kicked the door closed behind him once they struggled with the freezer. Ziva heard the noise and appeared in the hallway holding the baby.

"Jake, look who is home." She told the smiling infant.

The toothless smile immediately warmed Gibbs' heart and he signaled for Tony to put the freezer down. The moment is touched the floor Tony had Jake in his arms to say 'hello'.

Ziva walked over and examined their choice. Opening the lid she turned to Gibbs and smiled. "This is perfect. Thank you so much for your help."

Gibbs waved her off. "If I didn't help your Mother would have kicked my ass."

Gibbs heard Rivka chuckle from the doorway. "You've got that right." She eyes the appliance. "Nice choice. It will fit perfectly in there."

Eden followed her out of the bedroom holding a small box of items. "Well, I'm going to head out. I have an appointment tonight."

Ziva and Rivka said their goodbyes while Gibbs and Tony maneuvered the freezer into place and got it plugged in.

"Good. Give it a few hours to get cool and we won't have to worry about opening the freezer door and having things fall out on our toes anymore." Tony said with a chuckle.

Everyone settled in to eat the dinner Rivka has ordered. Tony took the liberty of putting Ziva's Philly cheesesteak on a plate as she was busy nursing a very hungry baby.

Jake was finally satisfied after nursing from both breasts and once he was burped he was ready to go. Tony placed him in his infant seat and sat him on the couch next to him which made him happy. Every adult who got up to move around stopped to talk directly to him.

Gibbs went in to check on the freezer one more time before he and Rivka departed. Satisfied that it was working they bid goodnight to Tony and Ziva. Before leaving, Gibbs pulled Ziva into a strong bear hug. She was surprised by the move but did not comment. Once they'd left, Ziva watched as Gibbs put his arm around Rivka's shoulders as they went down the hallway.

They finished their dinner almost in silence neither ready to broach the subject that had come up earlier. Tony volunteered to bathe Jake so Ziva could go in and enjoy a hot bath.

She reclined into the hot water and allowed her eyes to close. She tried to relax but her mind was reeling with a thousand emotions slamming into her at once.

She felt like there were butterflies fluttering in her stomach. Unconsciously she moved her hand over it trying to chase away the nervousness that was there.

'You do not have to do this tonight!' her mind told her. 'He is not going to push you if you are not ready.'

The bubble filled warm water had made her skin soft and silky. Her mind drifted to Tony and his loving caresses. He had a way of touching her that made her feel like she'd been touched by pure electricity. She'd never felt anything like it before and wanted to feel him all over her body.

But then the fear seeped in. The thought of any man on top of her and pushing into her made her tremble.

She slid her hands up her stomach and to her breasts and caressed them gently. She squeezed her eyes tightly closed remembering how the men in Somalia and grabbed and pulled and pinched. Her breasts had been bruised and swollen from the abuse.

Tony never once had touched her like that. He'd always touched them like a feather, lavishing that part of her femininity with love and appreciation.

She allowed her hands to slide back down her ribcage and farther until her right hand came to the juncture between her legs. She raised her left leg out of the water and opened her eyes to watch the white foamy bubbles run down her knee and back into the tub.

She dipped her fingers gently into her folds touching herself in the most intimate way possible. She remembered the brutality and pain, tearing and bleeding that she'd experienced in Somalia. She'd never experienced pain and humiliation like that… soreness in her pelvic region that left her barely able to bring her legs together let alone attempt to walk.

Tony had touched her here last night. Soft and arousing he'd left every nerve ending in her body begging for more. She continued to stroke herself and thought of the depth of love and caring he'd shown her. She wanted him so much but something in the back of her mind was still terrifying her.

Her fingers stopped their ministrations and her eyes snapped open. Fear. Pure and simple. She was afraid of how her mind and body was going to react to him. Add on the fact that Tony is a well-endowed man and if she experienced any sort of discomfort….

She sighed and shook her head, placing both of her hands on her forehead. "Just stop it Ziva!" She said out loud to herself. She used her toe to let the water out of the bath. She turned on the shower to rinse the access soap from her body and wash her hair.

Once done she wrapped herself in a towel and poked her head out of the bathroom. Tony was sitting in the nursery with the baby. Jake was in his pajamas and drinking halfheartedly from a bottle with his eyes only half open.

She smiled and slipped back into the bathroom. The baby would be asleep soon meaning Tony would probably settle in the living room in front of the television. She stood in front of the mirror and opened her towel staring at the reflection of her nude form.

'This is it Ziva.' She said to herself and reached into the cabinet beneath the sink.

Tony sighed contentedly as he sank into the cushions of the sofa. Jake had gone to sleep quickly. He hoped that he would sleep for a while giving him and Ziva a chance to talk.

He heard the hair dryer turn on in the bathroom and smiled. Everything felt so domestic to him now. Never in his wildest dreams would he have imagined his life turning out this way.

He turned on ESPN in a sad attempt to catch up with the world of sports. He watched for a few minutes but started to doze until he heard the hair dryer turn off.

He wiped at his face and focused again on the television until he heard her move behind him.

"Is Jake asleep?" She asked softly.

"Yep. He drank almost four ounces and then was out like a light." He said without turning around.

He heard her walking softly towards him but had to swallow deeply when she appeared in his line of sight.

She was breathtaking. She wore no makeup but had partially straightened her hair so that it fell into soft waves at her shoulders. Tony also couldn't help but note that she wasn't wearing any clothes either, instead opting for a large white bath towel.

He smiled up at her. "Well, what's a gorgeous woman like you do in a place like this?" He joked.

She hesitated momentarily but the smiled. She reached out to take his hands tugging him softly onto his feet. She began to lead him away from the couch but he stopped long enough to grab the remote and flip off the TV.

"Ziva?" He asked softly.

She shook her head gently. "No more talking." She said quietly continuing to lead them down the hallway to the bedroom.

She sat on the edge of the bed and looked up at him standing just a few inches away. She brought his hand to her mouth and kissed the inside of his wrist. "Make love to me Tony." She whispered.

He bent down to her eye level. "Ziva… I only want to ask you once. Are you sure?"

She didn't reply but instead slid farther back on to the bed and looked deep into his eyes. She reached for the knot in the front of her towel and pulled on it allowing it to fall open and expose her nude body to him.

He smiled and leaned forward to kiss her suddenly overcome with a case of nerves. Since when is Tony DiNozzo afraid of sex?

'This isn't just sex.' He thought to himself. 'This is the rest of our lives.'

He stood back on his feet and moved across the room. Ziva sat up leaning back on her elbows to watch him. He walked to the doorway and flipped the switch to the ceiling fan.

"It's not quite warm enough out for air conditioning." He said causing her to smile. He was referring back to her comment of liking the air conditioning on.

The breeze from the fan blew against her warm skin causing goose bumps. He walked slowly towards her allowing every opportunity for her to change her mind.

She watched him quietly as he began to undress. She perused appreciatively along every ounce of flesh he revealed.

Once down to his boxers she sat up to a sitting position and grabbed his hands. She tugged him to the bed indicating where she wanted him.

They lay side by side staring into one another's eyes. He gently caressed her face and hair before moving in to kiss her. It was sweet and filled with the promise of their future.

Ziva's arm instinctively went around him, her bare left leg sliding over his as their kisses became more passionate and needy. They continued to explore each other's mouths slowly until Ziva moaned softly in the back of her throat.

Tony broke their kiss and pulled slightly away from her. He smiled gently at her. "I love you so much." He whispered.

She smiled and touched the side of his face. "I love you too so much. "

Tony moved in and gently nibbled her earlobe. She smiled and moved her body closer allowing her hands to trail down his chest and stomach until she was gently able to cup him through his boxers.

His lips had found that sensitive spot between her neck and shoulder that made her shiver. His teeth gently nibbled and teased under she shuddered against him.

He gently laid her down onto her back. She smiled softly and stroked his cheek. "You're so beautiful." He whispered suddenly overcome with emotion.

Their lips found each other again. Tony's leg moved over Ziva's so that he was partially lying on top of her. His hands gently cupped her right breast as his lips moved down and found her left.

Her hand found the front of his boxers again as she gently began to massage him. He was hardening to her touch. As she felt him lengthen her eyes closed involuntarily to fight off the sudden pang of panic that struck her.

Tony must have sensed it and pulled away. She opened her eyes and was met with the windows directly into his soul. "Do not stop." She implored him softly.

His mouth continued to lavish attention on her breasts as she stroked and cupped him softly. His hand left her breasts and moved down to stroke her ribcage. She sensed where it was destined to be and parted her legs to allow him access.

Their mouths met again but she shifted slighted when his fingers dipped between her folds and began stroking her. He moaned against his mouth again but suddenly jumped when he began to stroke her clit.

His slow languid strokes sped slightly causing Ziva's hips to move in rhythm of his fingers. Her lips broke contact with his as she began to moan in conjunction with his strokes.

Two of his fingers worked her in a circular pattern. She was fighting the sensations coursing through her body. Her hips began moving to grind her against his fingers. She squeezed her eyes closed as she began gasping for air in ragged breaths.

"Ziva look at me." Tony ordered softly. However his fingers didn't stop their movements and in a halfhearted attempt to fight off her pending orgasm, she squeezed her eyes tighter together.

"Ziva, look at me please. I want to see you cum." His voice was soft but pleading. She forced her eyes open and focused on his face just inches away from hers. Their eyes locked as her moans continued.

She reached up and cupped his cheek softly and continued to watch the emotions play across his face. Tony bent and kissed her forehead. "Let go baby." He whispered.

Two more strokes and she was done; yelling his name as the orgasm racked her body. He allowed her a few seconds before stroking her a few more times causing her body to arch off the bed before he released her.

Her eyes had closed as the ecstasy washed through her. She opened them again and looked at him, smiling softly.

"I will never be able to watch you type again and not think about how good you are with your fingers." She teased. He smiled but didn't reply choosing instead to continue to explore her core.

She began rocking into his touch again. He dipped first one, then two fingers into her causing her to gasp slightly. Tony watched her face as he slid his fingers in and out of her opening. She muttered his name before her words turned to soft moans.

She was wet, but Tony was worried that it wasn't enough. As his fingers continued, his thumb began rubbing her clit again. Her eyes shot open and she gently pushed him away causing him to automatically freeze.

"Enough teasing." She demanded and pulled herself up on her knees. She pushed him onto his back and reached for his boxers. He lifted his hips and allowed her to slide them off of his legs. His erection sprang free which brought a feral smile to her face.

Before he knew it her mouth was on him. "Shit Ziva!" He moaned as her mouth engulfed him causing his length to harden to painful proportions.

She gently worked his tip, licking and sucking as she used her free hand to work the rest of his shaft. His hands wound into her hair and it was his turn as his hips began involuntarily rocking into her mouth. She moaned against his length before her mouth disappeared.

Tony began to raise his head to see what she was up to when her mouth suddenly began teasing and tasting his balls. "F— God!" He moaned as she continued, her hand now pumping up and down his shaft.

She suddenly took his tip again, taking extra special time to lick the precum from him.

"Zi- Ziva." He couldn't form the words to tell her to stop. He didn't need to. She already knew.

She let go of him with an audible "POP" and sat up, smiling down at him as she wiped her mouth. He sat up on his knees as she leaned over and pulled their 'magic bottle' from the nightstand.

They sat on their knees facing one another as he reached out to stroke to cheek. Her hair was already mussed but he couldn't help pushing it back from her face.

Their lips met softly. Tony swore that the kiss conveyed to him that she was okay, she was definitely ready. They broke apart again and she smiled, telling him that he was indeed correct. She popped open the top of the bottle and squeezed some of the lubricant into her hand before closing it and tossing it onto the other side of the bed.

She reached out and began stroking the lubricant along his length smiling coyly as he twitched to her touch. Satisfied with her work, she leaned into kiss him again before placing her hands on his shoulders and pulling him down on top of her as she lay back onto the bed.

His mouth toyed with her breasts again as he allowed his length to tease her folds. She sighed in frustration. "Now Tony!" She begged.

He began to roll them over so that she was on top but she stopped him. "Ziva I-"

She put a finger on his lips. "No Tony. I need you to be in control." She explained hoping that he would understand.

He moved directly on top of her so that they were staring face to face, eye to eye. He poised himself at her entrance and ever so gently began to enter her.

He watched her face and body language slowly as he slid further into her velvety warmth. Her eyes slid closed but her face held no expression. Suddenly her hands were on the front of his shoulders and Tony waited for her to attempt to push him off of her.

But she didn't, instead she hooked her hands under his arms and pulled him closer. He paused and slid slightly out of her before pushing in again. She then smiled and moaned, bringing her legs up and hooked them lazily over his legs to allow him to push deeper.

He began moving inside of her, after ever so many strokes sliding deeper until he was buried to the hilt. She cried out in pleasure and dug her nails into his back. Her hips began thrusting against him and they soon found a rhythm where they met each other thrust for thrust.

She blindly reached her hands out and pulled him down close to her again, kissing the side of his face and then his neck gently biting and nipping as waves of pleasure coursed through her body.

Their voices mix and mingled in whispers of love and cries of pleasure. Their sweat beaded skin began making slapping sounds as their intimate dance became more frenzied. Tony reached between them and found her swollen bud and began working it with his fingers again.

She began moaning in different languages, none of which Tony could understand. Suddenly he heard in English "Fuck me Tony- harder."

He could feel his release coming quickly but wanted her to go first. He worked harder at her clit causing her to cry out and dig her nails into his back again. Sweat ran from his hairline and down his face dripping onto her face and causing her to smile.

"T-Tony!" She screamed as another orgasm overtook her. He released her clit and thrust a few more times before his own body exploded pumping his soul into her.

She was panting but refusing to come down from her high. She reached between them and stroked him gently as she continued to ride out the pleasure they shared. He began to pull out of her which caused a new type of friction in her already overly sensitive body. She orgasmed again flooded the bed between them.

Her eyes snapped open and when she was finally able to focus, she saw Tony smiling down at her. "I-I-" She still couldn't speak. After several moments of panting she tried again.

"I've never done that before." She confessed to him slightly embarrassed.

He smiled proudly and stroked her face. "That was amazing." He reassured her kissing her breathlessly again.

She continued to look embarrassed at how her body had reacted. He touched her cheek softly again. "Don't be embarrassed. That is sexy as hell. Your previous lovers should be embarrassed that they couldn't stimulate you enough."

She smiled softly and stroked his cheek. "No one before you has cared enough. It was always just sex. This… this was making love, yes?"

He smiled brightly. "Oh yeah. And I plan to make you do that over" kiss "over" kiss "and over again."

She chuckled. "I am up for the challenge if you are." She teased.

His entire body felt like jelly but he didn't want to move from on top of her. "Am I crushing you?"

She shook her head. "I want you to stay there forever." She said softly.

He looked serious for a moment. "It might make it a little hard to investigate crime scenes." He pointed out.

She smiled. "True."

He slid onto the bed next to her and immediately gathered her into his arms. She laid on his chest feeling sleep overcome her as her body wound down from it's previous high.

He softly stroked her hair and chuckled. "We should change these sheets. We sort of made a mess."

She raised her eyes and looked at him. "I am not done with you yet."

To Be Continued


	89. Chapter 89

**This chapter is shorter than most of my others. I'm trying to get my TIVA legs back under me. I've been so blah with the show and the holding pattern they seem to have our couple in. ::sigh::**

**If any of you are Star Trek: The Next Generation/Imzadi fans, I began posting a fic that I started working on years ago. I'll be working on both stories at the same time so don't fret. This story won't be abandoned. I think a couple people might hunt me down if I did. LOL**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More 89"**

Tony wasn't sure how long he'd been asleep. What he did know was that he awoke to an empty bed which made him very nervous.

He sat up quickly and focused on listening to the sounds around him. It was quiet which didn't help his uneasy feeling.

Leaning against the headboard of the bed he breathed a sigh of relief when Ziva quietly entered the room. She was wearing the shirt he'd had on earlier. When she saw him awake she smiled.

"I did not mean to wake you." She said.

He shook his head. "You didn't. I woke up on my own. You weren't here-"He said softly pointing out the obvious.

She sat on the edge of the bed while watching him closely. "Yes, I had to use the bathroom and went to check on the baby."

Tony release tension from his body that he didn't even know he had. "Is Jake okay?"

She smiled softly and nodded. "He had barely moved. He is sleeping soundly."

He nodded. Ziva stood and pulled the blankets off of Tony before climbing onto his lap and straddling him.

She was wearing nothing under her shirt. He could feel her heat on his bare legs which set his nerve endings on fire.

She wrapped her arms over his shoulders. "You were worried?" She asked gently.

"No. I just… you weren't here and… I… I was worried." He admitted.

She smiled. "There is no need. I am fine." She leaned forward and kissed him gently. "It was wonderful." She told him before kissing him again.

He ran his hand up her bare thighs and over her hips under they rested above her backside. "I love you." He whispered.

She stopped and watched him closely.

"Now it is my turn. What is wrong?" She asked him.

He shook his hand as his hand slipped over her bare behind. "It's stupid." He argued.

"Tell me."

"It's just… this.. being here with you like this. I never thought I'd ever have this chance-" He became emotional and lost his ability to speak.

She shifted gently in his lap as his hands began to stroke and cup her butt. "I will be honest… I did not think we would ever have this opportunity either."

Tony used his hands to slide her closer to him until she brushed against his erection that was coming to life again. He chuckled. "It took you having my baby with another man to kick me in the ass."

She smiled. "One miracle led to another, yes?"

He nodded and leaned forward to capture her lips. One of his hands slid forward and between her folds gently flicking her clit and causing her body to jump slightly. They continued to kiss as his finger worked her again causing her to whimper.

Their slips separated and Tony had to smile as she moved herself over his still finger, begging him for more. Their first time was gentle; Tony didn't think this time would be the same.

Her hands were suddenly on him, stroking his erection to life and she continued to work herself over his fingers. His arm wrapped around her as he suddenly moved across the bed and grabbed the bottle they'd discarded earlier.

As he flipped the lid open, Ziva released him and threw her shirt over her head and onto the floor. He gently rubbed some of the glycerin solution on himself before tossing it to the side again.

Ziva smiled a feral grin before her lips pounced on Tony's. His hands were on her hips and lifting her up. She reached down and took him in her hands before sinking down onto his shaft.

He slid into her easily fitting like a glove. They both moaned at the feeling of him sheathed completed inside of her.

"You're so amazing." He whispered against her neck as he trailed his lips across. She smiled and began to slowly rock again him. Long, lazy motions that was heightening their sensations.

Tony's hands were on her hips again silently instructing her to move quicker. She smiled and leaned back until both her hands were on the bed, their new angle causing them both to moan.

He captured one of her breasts in his mouth as she continued to ride him. Her whimpers were becoming louder and pronounced. Tony's fingers again found her clit and began rubbing it which caused her to moan loudly.

"Tony-please-"

He grabbed her and pulled her towards him. "What baby- what do you want?"

She flew forward until her head was on his shoulder. Her pelvis never missed a stroke where they were joined.

He strummed her clit again. Her head moved back and forth against his shoulder as beads of sweat began forming along her hair line.

He turned his head until his mouth was against her ear, fighting his own natural instinct to meet her thrust for thrust.

"What do you like Ziva, tell me-"

"I-I cannot- God!"

"You can tell me Ziva-"He almost begged as he continued to toy with her.

She shook her head against his shoulder. Suddenly her body stilled. "No, no I cannot-"She spoke breathlessly but quietly.

Tony had struck a nerve and hadn't even realized it. He searched his memory banks from their earlier conversations.

Suddenly it dawned on him. He touched her shoulders and moved her face to his.

"Do you want to try?" He asked her softly. Neither moved to separate from where they were joined.

Fear flashed through her eyes. "No-"

He smiled understandingly. "Okay."

He touched her cheek. "Do you trust me?"

She nodded. "Absolutely." She said softly but firmly.

"Okay." His hands were on her hips again raising her up until he slipped from inside of her. They both sighed at the lost contact.

"Now turn around baby." He whispered into her ear.

She hesitated momentarily which caused Tony a moment of doubt. "We don't have to."

She smiled and kissed him before climbing from his lap. He used his hands to show her where he wanted her, back on his lap just facing away from him.

Her legs were straddling him as he pulled her back again his chest until her head was resting against his right shoulder. "Relax baby." He whispered to her as his hands began massaging her bare skin.

She sighed and closed her eyes, breathing deeply as he massaged and tweaked every inch of her torso. He brought both hands up and began gently massaging her breasts which caused her to squirm against him.

She felt his erection between her legs. She knew exactly where she wanted him but before she could do anything about it his hands were between her legs. Her parted her thighs and began gently stroking between her folds. Her body jumped when he dipped two fingers into her before moving them in and out in a regular rhythm.

She whimpered again and began moving herself along his fingers. His other hands found her clit again.

"Tony… please-"Her body was starting to lose control again.

He smiled and began sucking on her earlobe. "What do you want Ziva?" He whispered before blowing warm air against her ear.

His finger began moving against her clit like he was strumming a guitar. She released a string of curse words in at least two languages Tony recognized.

He smiled and took himself in his hand and angled towards her opening. She felt him and raised her pelvis up and sheathed him in her depths again.

"God Tony!" She yelled. He held her still until she gained some control again before they woke the baby. Both of his hands held her breasts as he slowly began sliding in and out of her.

She moaned and moved against him her body. They both knew she wasn't going to last long in this position. Her continued to massage her breasts while their bodies moved in perfect rhythm.

Tony could feel himself starting to lose control. Their earlier activities plus having Ziva completely on top of him like this was making his stamina less than 100%.

Instead of a slow build Tony felt the rush coming all at once. Two more strokes and he came buried deep inside of her. "Ziva!" He yelled as her inner muscles milked every ounce of what he had to give.

She smiled against his neck and reached between them, stroking her clit until she was ready to let go. His hand quickly took over as he insisted on being the one to bring her over the edge.

She came quick and hard against him again flooding the bed. They sat still panting and smiling at the same time.

"I- I can't- move." She said with a chuckle.

Tony smiled. "I don't want you to."

Suddenly, a loud cry from the other room drew their attention.

"Oh my God Jake, you have got to be kidding." Ziva murmured. She gently climbed off of Tony and grabbed her shirt. She laughed. "I am a mess." She told him as she disappeared out of the room.

Finally regaining his muscle strength, he gently stood from the bed and went into the bathroom to clean up. He returned and stripped off the bedding. Not bothering to dress, he quickly put fresh sheets and blankets onto the bed. Ziva appeared several moments later with Jake lying in her arms.

He looked pissed.

"I think we woke him up." She told Tony sheepishly.

He chuckled. "What happened buddy?"

Ziva smiled when she saw that Tony had changed the bed and was buried beneath the blankets. She handed him the baby, grabbed some underwear from her dresser and disappeared into the bathroom.

Tony was talking to the baby who still looked cross at his daddy. "Sorry Jake. We'll be quieter next time."

Jake didn't look like he believed him. Ziva reappeared a few moments later after freshening up. She came to the bed and stripped off her shirt again, lying on her side next to Tony. She turned Jake to his side and got into position so he could nurse.

He swallowed loudly almost as if to point out that he was still angry at them. Tony was gently stroking the back of the baby's head. Once Jake had started to sleep again he reached forward and touched Ziva's cheek.

"How do you feel?" He asked suddenly, unsure of why he wanted to know.

She looked down at the sleeping baby and then adoringly into his eyes. "Complete." She answered simply.

To Be Continued


	90. Chapter 90

**So… are you guys getting bored with this one yet? LOL**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 90**

Tony had drifted off into a sated but comfortable sleep. He has been stroking the back of Jake's soft hair and staring lovingly at Ziva as his eyes had closed.

Awareness started to overcome him. However, something felt… off. First thing, he felt horrible, almost hung over. Perhaps their earlier exertions had really taken a toll on him.

Reaching out blindly he felt for Ziva. He was met with an empty, cold bed. And speaking of which, why did the sheets feel so strange?

He gasped as he forced his eyes open. He wasn't met with the neutral colors he'd become accustomed to at the home he and Ziva shared. He instead was staring at the bedroom in his old apartment.

His head turned quickly from side to scan scanning his surroundings. Everything was as it had been. Staring down at what should be Ziva's spot on the bed he frowned at the empty liquor bottle that laid there instead.

He grabbed his forehead and squeezed his eyes closed. He opened his eyes again nothing had changed.

"No, no no-" He mumbled to himself.

He tossed back the blankets and frowned even more. He was still dressed in his rumpled clothes from work. Apparently having drank until passing out in bed.

"It can't be… it couldn't be-"

He stumbled outside of his room and instead of being met with the hallway which would lead to Jake's room; he was met with the cold hard reality of his messy apartment. There was no other bedroom, no nursery… no Ziva.

"What… no God no…" He sprang into the kitchen, determined to figure out what day of the week it was… or even WHEN it was. He had to get to Ziva; he had to tell her that the baby she was carrying was his!

He paused at an invitation lying crumpled on his counter. He picked it up and fingered it gently. That's when it all came flashing back to him…

The invitation was to a wedding… Ziva and Josh's wedding. There was no invitro, no chance that Jake was his…. No chance for him and Ziva at all.

Ziva has met Josh while in Miami on the Reynosa case. They'd dated for several months before he'd moved to DC to be with her. He'd also brought an engagement ring with him, dropping to his knees in front of the entire team and proposing to her.

She wasn't pregnant, at least not yet. Jake didn't exist. It has all been a figment of his wild imagination.

He had to stop it before it was too late. He'd seen what their future could be like. He couldn't let it all slip away.

Glancing at the clock, he realized Ziva would be jogging near her apartment. He grabbed his keys and sprinted out the door.

He'd reached the running path rather quickly. And there she was, her hair in a ponytail and ear buds in her ears as she ran along. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Tony, and then frowned when she saw his appearance.

His hair was standing on end, his eyes bloodshot from the alcohol the night before. He was wearing the same clothes he had on the day before, only now they were rumpled and creased practically beyond recognition.

"Tony?" She asked slowing to a walk before stopping a few feet in front of him. "Are you okay? What are you doing here?"

He had to make her understand. They're entire lives depended on it. "Ziva, don't marry him." He implored her.

Her inquisitive look immediately turned to a frown. "What?"

"I said don't marry him. You can't marry him."

She sighed and crossed her arms. "And why is that?"

"Because I love you!" He confessed.

His heart clenched as her face became unreadable. It then broke into a million pieces when her mouth broke into a grin, then a smile, until she laughed in his face.

"You? Tony you? Look at you!" She chuckled again and began putting her music back in her ears. She pushed past him.

"But Ziva-"

She turned shaking her head. "It is too late Tony. Our chance is long gone. I am happy. I love Joshua. He loves me. Please just leave me alone."

She shook her head again before picking up her run. Tony stared dumbfounded as she disappeared out of sight.

It was over. It was all over.

He wasn't sure how he'd made it back to his apartment. He walked in a daze through the empty rooms glaring at the crumpled invitation sitting on his counter.

Everything was numb. He didn't want to be in this life. This wasn't a life, it was an existence.

He moved trancelike until he fetched the last two items he needed. Flopping onto the sofa, he unfolded the rumpled invitation and stared at the words. Tears dripped from his eyes onto the fancy writing causing it to smear.

Looking at the service weapon next to him he'd made his decision. He expertly clicked off the safety. Using his free hand, he pulled the invitation to his heart while moving the gun to his temple.

His finger began to squeeze-

-and then he heard it; the distant sound of a baby crying. Not just any baby… that was Jake!

He jumped awake with a start. His body was beaded with sweat his eyes wild as they tore around the room.

Ziva rose up slowly on her pillow. "Tony are you okay?"

He quickly rubbed his hands over his face before reaching out and grabbed onto Ziva for dear life. He pulled her to him and clung to her like a life line.

"Bad dream." He whispered into her hair.

She nodded and stroked his hair. The baby continued to cry for another moment before stopping. Ziva pulled away and turned to the monitor. "I should go check on him." She told Tony softly.

He nodded, and although he didn't want to let her go, released her. She put her fingers under his chin. "I'll be right back." She promised him.

She quietly left the room leaving Tony to ponder. He rested his elbows on his knees and allowed his head to fall into his hands. She reappeared moments later.

"He went back to sleep." She said quietly before sliding back into bed.

He reached for her again needing to seek the comfort only she could give. She gave it to him without hesitation. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He shook his head. "No. I just-" He stopped.

She raised her head up from his shoulder. "What?"

"I'd die without you." He said softly.

She gasped slightly. "Tony, please do not talk like that."

"It's true Ziva. If I didn't have you and Jake… life wouldn't be worth living anymore."

She sighed and gently pulled away from him. "What brought this on?" She asked as she touched his cheek gently.

He tousled her hair slightly before returning her gesture and touching her cheek. "Just- just a dream. A glimpse into what could have been. A nightmare really."

"Do you want to talk about it?" She tried again.

He shook his head. "No. I just want forget about it. Please." He pleaded.

She smiled softly. "Okay." She nestled back into her pillows and pulled him down with her. They settled down side by side, their faces so close that they were almost nose to nose.

"I'm afraid to go back to sleep." He confessed in a whisper.

Her brows furrowed. "Why?"

"I'm afraid if I sleep everything will be gone again."

Getting the slightest hint as to what his nightmare had been about; she leaned slightly forward and kissed him gently. "Tony, I am here. And Jake is here. But I cannot bear to hear you talking like this."

His eyes began to sting but he didn't respond. Ziva continued; "We have no control over what life throws at us. If.. and I am only saying if… something were to happen to me. I need to know that you and Jake will be okay."

He pulled away and shook his head. "No, nothing will happen-"

She placed a finger on his lips. "Tony we cannot always control that. An illness, an accident… I have to be able to pass peacefully know that our love made you strong enough to raise Jacob without me. I would want you to find someone, to love again-"

"I will never love anyone like I love you. " He said fighting the tears that were now blurring his vision.

"But you will try? Tony please, promise me."

He reached out and clung to her crying openly into her hair. "I… I promise-"

She smiled as tears ran down her own face. "Thank you. Now… how about we get some sleep? I have an appointment tomorrow."

Tony nodded but didn't release his grip on her. She kissed the side of his head and then his face. His grip loosened as he pulled away. Their tear stained eyes met.

She kissed him lovingly, pouring every ounce of her being into him. He returned the gesture, needing to feel her.

She sensed his need. She bore him down onto his back and slowly began to remove the little amount of clothing she wore. He reached to help her but her hands stopped him. Leaning down to his face she smiled softly.

"Let me."

He smiled and leaned back. They made love again, softly and quietly. Tony allowed her the lead and watched in fascination at the myriad of emotions that played across her face as she softly rode him.

Their souls combined as seamlessly as their bodies were. And when their bodies couldn't take it anymore they climaxed together in an almost inaudible gasp.

She collapsed, sweaty and exhausted on top of him. Their hands were joined as they drifted off to sleep together ready to face whatever life challenges came at them next.

* * *

The following morning was hectic. Both Tony and Ziva were tired having spent a lot of energy the night before. Ziva had an appointment at Amie's office and didn't have time to breastfeed before rushing out the door.

Tony warmed Jake's bottle up and sat on the couch ready to feed him. Jake still seemed a bit angry from last night but the minute the warm milk went into his belly he seemed to cheer up.

Tony was hoping Jake would take a decent nap before Ziva returned home. He wanted to surprise her and get a few more boxes unpacked. They were making a little progress in combining their homes, but Tony now suddenly felt the need to get it all done.

It was as if he wanted every trace of his old life gone. There was nothing but this life, and what they were building together to focus on.

He glanced down at Jake who was watching his Daddy with wide, bright eyes. "So Jake, it looks like it's going to be you and me kiddo. Want to help Daddy unpack?"

Jake smiled and waved his arms. Tony couldn't help but smile from the depths of his heart. "You know what Jake? You're a pretty darn cool kid to hang out with."

Tony stood and took the baby into the spare bedroom. He sighed at the massive amount of junk lying around. "Well, might as well get started."

* * *

Across town, Ziva sat in an exam room in Amie's office. The nurse put a bandage over the spot where she'd just drawn blood. "Amie said she wanted to see you before you go."

Ziva nodded and waited. Amie came whizzing in about ten minutes later. "I'm so sorry! It's been a long morning."

Ziva waved it off. "It's okay."

Amie pulled up a stool and sat in front of Ziva. "We'll have the blood results back in about 72 hours. It's just routine, nothing to worry about."

Ziva nodded. "Okay. This belongs to you." She said pulling the folder from her purse that Amie had left with them a few days before.

Amie took the folder and noted the large smile on Ziva's face. "So… I take it donor 132560 and Tony DiNozzo is one in the same?"

Ziva's smile lit up the room. "One in the same."

Amie threw her head back and laughed. "I guess that really does mean the two of you are soul mates."

"What do you mean?" Ziva asked, puzzled by the comment.

Amie's smile dimmed slight but she moved closer to Ziva. She took a deep breath. "We knew when we started that the chances were slim that you'd be able to get pregnant. I saw what every failed attempt did to you emotionally. After that last time…. I was going to refuse to do any more procedures."

Ziva's eyes dropped to her hands. Amie reached out and placed her hands on Ziva's. "You wanted a baby so badly, but I couldn't consciously watch all the progress you'd made emotionally be destroyed. "

Ziva nodded. "I understand, really I do. It is just hard to hear. Tony and I would one day like to have more children but-"

Amie sat back. "Ziva-"

"I know I know. I have warned Tony numerous times that it might not be possible. But his hope is infectious." She smiled sadly.

"Well, who knows? Maybe I'll be wrong and you two can have twins." Amie said encouragingly.

Ziva smiled. "Well, we will be happy with just one more."

Amie chuckled. "Oh okay, take away all my fun. Well, give your body a few more weeks to heal. Then we'll do a transvaginal ultrasound. Your pregnancy and delivery may have moved some of the scar tissue around."

Ziva looked at her seriously. "Or made it worse."

Amie nodded quietly. "Possibly."

Ziva's feet began to swing back and forth from her position on the bed. "Well, I know that we will have a good time trying."

Amie eyed her for a moment. "Ziva?"

Ziva smiled broadly and nodded.

Amie clapped her hands together. "And?"

Ziva smiled. "It was wonderful. He was so loving and caring. But so gentle and sensual at the same time." She sighed dreamily.

She looked at Amie and was surprised to see tears in her eyes. "What is wrong?"

Amie waved her hand and shook her head. "Nothing. I'm just…. I'm so damn proud of you Ziva. I think back to when we first met, and look at you now- "

"It is partly because of you. I can never repay everything you have done for me."

Amie shook her head. "I am a better person having gone through this with you. I have seen firsthand your transformation. It's been one of the most amazing journeys in my life."

A soft knock on the door interrupted their conversation. A nurse stuck her head in. "Sorry to interrupt." The nurse moved towards Amie and whispered in her ear.

Amie sighed. "Dammit. Okay."

She reached into her pocket and pulled out her prescription pad. "Here, get this filled."

Ziva glanced down at the paper now in her hand.

"It's low dose birth control. The dosage is small enough that it won't bother Jake when he breastfeeds."

Ziva smiled. "Thanks."

Amie nodded and quickly hugged her before disappearing out the door. Ziva hopped off the table and began exiting the clinic. She stepped into the sunshine and came face to face with what Ziva knew had to be police detectives. From their hair cuts to the attire they screamed cop.

They were walking with a young girl. She couldn't be any older than 25. Her face was bruised and swollen. She held her eyes down as if she was carefully watching where she was walking.

The male detective reached out a hand to gently guide her. Ziva watched as the girl flinched away from his touch. She raised her eyes as if ready to fight him off.

Her gaze locked directly with Ziva's. Deep down, Ziva knew that this was who the nurse was whispering to Amie about; another rape victim to come under her care.

The two women continued to gaze at one another. Ziva nodded gently, trying to convey to the young woman that there was indeed, light at the end of the tunnel.

The woman seemed to understand that Ziva was a kindred spirit. She nodded back slightly, her swollen face showing a hint of gratitude before the detectives hustled her inside of the doors.

Ziva sighed and looked to the sky, hoping that the young woman's life turns out as perfect as hers is now.

To Be Continued


	91. Chapter 91

**Sorry about the long wait folks. Real life has been crazy… and it will be for the next few weeks unfortunately. And sorry to say, this chapter is shorter than most of the others. =(**

**Sorry for faking you all out in the last chapter. LOL I felt like I needed to stir everyone up a little bit. Tee Hee**

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 91**

Ziva smiled when she entered the apartment and found Tony sitting upright on the couch sound asleep. Jake was laying in his bassinette and had apparently been so for a while. He was kicking his arms and legs wildly and looking around the room. He immediately sensed Ziva's presence and turned to her, a large toothless grin adorning his face.

She smiled back at him. Leaning over she spoke softly. "Hello my little man. Are you having a good day today?" Jake continued to smile but looked away. Satisfied that he seemed content to lay on his own for a while Ziva glanced around the apartment.

Half a dozen now empty boxes sat in the corner. Tony had been hard at work while she was gone. She smiled and glanced lovingly at him sleeping on the sofa. Deciding that both he and Jake were fine right where they were she grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and booted up her laptop.

She hadn't had time to do anything online for what seemed like forever. She sighed as she watched the unread e-mails begin to appear in her Inbox. One, in particular, caught her attention immediately.

It was from Eli. She stared at the screen as the e-mails continued to amass. Once they were finally done she reached for her computer mouse realizing that he hand was shaking slightly.

She double clicked the familiar e-mail address and took a deep breath before focusing her eyes on the screen.

_Ziva,_

_I hope this finds you well. I know that you probably do not want to hear from me, but you are still my daughter. And despite what mistakes I may or may not have made, you will always be my daughter. I wanted to take a moment to congratulate you on the birth of your son. I hope he brings you everything you have been looking for._

_Joy and happiness to you. Give Rivka and Gibbs my best._

_Eli_

Ziva snorted and clicked the mouse hard closing the e-mail. She sat back in her chair and crossed her arms. She bit back her anger at his little shot at the end of his message. Thinking twice she opened the e-mail again and forwarded it to Rivka, writing in the subject line only two words:

_Sanctimonious Bastard_

She hit send and sat back in her chair again. She glanced over and Tony who was still asleep. Jake was making small noises as he played all by himself.

The 'little minx' as Tony used to call her was suddenly awakened. She went and grabbed her digital camera and aimed it at Jake. He stared directly at it and smiled. She glanced at the small screen and her heart melted at the picture Jake just graced her with.

This part of Ziva was one that she learned to squelch over time. However, in certain circumstances she let her out to play for a while. She popped the digital card out of her camera and plugged it into her computer.

She hit reply to her Father's e-mail and began to type:

_Father,_

_I am pleased to know you are well. Thank you for your kind words. Please do not lose any sleep. Mother and I are doing wonderful. The new lives we have carved for ourselves have turned out to be very full and satisfying._

_Say hello to your grandson. His name is Jacob Anthony DiNozzo. Perhaps one day, if the situation if right, you will have the opportunity to meet him.  
_

_Jacob looks just like Tony, yes?_

_Be well. Tony sends his regards._

_-Ziva_

She smirked as she attached the photo and hit the send button.

* * *

Thousands of miles away, Eli was sitting in his lonely dark office and the streets of Tel Aviv bustled outside. His brows rose slightly at the e-mail that popped up in front of him

His breath caught at the picture of the smiling, happy baby. He read Ziva's words and chuckled deeply. 'So you haven't lost your fire.' He thought to himself.

* * *

Jake was starting to get antsy so Ziva signed her computer off and closed the lid. She went over the picked up her little model and cuddled him to her chest.

"We showed him, didn't we?" She asked Jake who began to nestle against her chest. She sat in a chair across from Tony and had the baby breast feeding within moments.

"Who's Jake modeling for?" A sleepy voice asked from the couch. She smiled at Tony.

"My Father. He sent me an e-mail. "

Tony yawned and wiped his face before replying. "What did Eli have to say?"

Ziva shrugged. "Just congratulating me." She rolled her eyes. "He managed to completely ignore you. Oh, and had a nice little parting shot for Mother."

Tony chuckled. "I'm sure you took care of it."

Ziva smirked. "I did."

"Hey, I have a surprise for you!" Tony said suddenly wide awake and sitting up.

"You do?" She asked.

He nodded. "I have to go back to work next week. And you're going to start working from home. I thought maybe a night out would be nice before then."

She smiled wistfully. "That sounds wonderful but-"

He put his hand up. "I've already arranged for a babysitter."

"Not Abby-" She began.

He chuckled. "No, I don't think that's a good idea. Eden is going to watch him for us. She's going to help us out when we get stuck as the office anyway. Jake should get used to being alone with her from time to time."

Ziva looked uncertainly down at the baby. She sighed. "Leaving him with you or Gibbs for a short time is one thing but…."

Tony's brows furrowed slightly. Ziva continued to look uncertain for a few moments before turning to Tony. He looked so hopeful and they really could use a night to themselves…

"Okay." She said uncertainly.

Tony stood and moved towards her, squatting down in front of her. "Let's just try it. If you want to come home early, we can."

She nodded and smiled. "Okay."

* * *

Hours later, Tony walked Jake to Eden's apartment. She opened the door with a flourish and smiled. "Well, there's my date for the night." She exclaimed taking the baby from Tony.

He followed her into her apartment and was surprised to see a portable crib set up. Tony took the bag off of her shoulder and began pulling items out. "There's diapers, wipes, some changes of clothes, toys, breast milk, bottles, pacifiers even though he doesn't like them-"

He stopped when he heard Eden laugh. "Tony, relax. He'll be fine. I thought Ziva would be the nervous one."

Tony chuckled. "She's changed her mind three times already."

Eden laughed. "Say goodnight to Daddy." She told Jake.

Tony went and kissed Jake on the forehead. "Be good buddy."

Eden smirked at him. "If he's not, I have a few Mossad tricks up my sleeve to make him sleep."

Tony's face took on a look of horror.

She laughed. "I'm kidding Tony, go! I have both of your numbers; I have a key to your apartment if I need anything else. "

He nodded and kissed the baby again before exiting the apartment. He was so glad that Jake wasn't crying because he knew in his heart of hearts, that he wouldn't be able to walk away hearing Jake's cries.

Tony entered their apartment uncertainly until he saw Ziva. She'd just emerged from getting ready in the bathroom. His breath hitched in his throat.

She was wearing a dark blue mini dress that was hugging her curves just right. It dipped just low enough to reveal enough cleavage to tease him through the night. Her makeup was light but accentuated her natural beauty. She'd left her hair curly, not bothering to straighten it at all.

He silently thanked whoever it was that created this goddess in front of him. She smiled when she saw his expression.

She held her arms out at her side. "You like?" She teased.

He smiled. "I like."

She chuckled and grabbed her purse from the counter. "Let us go then, yes?"

He offered his elbow to her. She laced her arm through and smiled. They were almost out the door when Tony's cell began to chirp. They both immediately panicked thinking it was Eden.

Tony whipped his phone out and frowned at the display. "What is it?" She asked.

"It's my Dad." He said softly. He thought for a minute before hitting the "Go to Voicemail" button and putting the phone back in his pocket.

"You are not going to answer it?" She asked.

He shook his head. "No. I called him ages ago and he's just now getting back to me. He can wait one more day."

She smiled at him and led him out the door.

To Be Continued


	92. Chapter 92

**Just a quick note, again sorry for the short chapter. =( I had to hurry up and post this one. My poor, darling friend Cindy needed to be snapped out of her "I hate CiRay headspace" before she ate a ton of candy. LMAO**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 92**

Riding in the elevator to their apartment Tony couldn't help but smile at the effects of the wine Ziva had consumed earlier. She'd allowed herself the opportunity of having alcohol while Tony had declined sticking strictly with mineral water.

After being threatened with bodily harm from Eden if they called to check on Jake one more time, they'd both laughed at their worry over the baby and allowed themselves to relax. After her second glass of red wine she began to flirt more openly with him. After the third glass her flirting had turned into outright teasing that had made Tony's blood run hot.

And after all of the touches, gently caresses under the table, and whispered promises of what was to happen later, she'd had the nerve to prolong his agony and order dessert.

At this moment, she had him pinned up against the wall of the elevator and was torturously exploring his mouth with her tongue. In the back of his mind it had registered that the car had stopped, but the ding of the elevator doors opening caused them to jump apart quickly.

He quickly wiped her lip gloss from his mouth and dropped his head to hide the grin adorning his face. Ziva, being ever so coy, stepped back to allow the waiting residents to enter the elevator. As she did she managed to press her backside against Tony's groin. He almost squealed as electricity shot through his veins.

'Two can play this game.' He thought. He placed his hands on her shoulders as the doors finally closed. Once the car started moving again his hands innocently trailed down her shoulder blades and back until they gently brushed against her butt. She shifted slightly as he gently caressed her.

Undaunted, Tony's downward journey continued until his hands reached the bottom of her short skirt and slid under. He gently began caressing the bare flesh until Ziva's breath hitched. His hands didn't stop until the elevator halted at their floor.

Ziva grabbed Tony's hand and practically barreled over their neighbors as she dragged him off the elevator.

He struggled to unlock the door fast enough. Once inside they were on each other instantly not waiting to hear the door shut before their clothes became strewn across their home.

They made love with wild abandon and without fear of waking a sleeping baby in the next room. Their bodies were burning for each other so deeply it was as if the outside world had melted away. She climaxed loudly and immediately begged him for more before the waves of pleasure had started to abate. His own release was so harsh he felt like he'd been shot out of a cannon. Instead of cuddling together they merely collapsed next to each other.

Once they were able to catch their breaths and gather their faults Tony reached his arm over in her direction. She scooted over and was finally able to roll and settle against his chest. Tony began to gently stroke her sweat slicked hair as she drew patterns on his chest.

Finally after several minutes, she moaned and smiled. "That was amazing." She commented.

He smiled and kissed the top of her head. "That's the stuff that fantasies are made off." He joked.

She smiled and turned her face towards his. "You used to fantasize about us… together?"

His smile grew wider. "Oh yeah. " His hand left her hair and gently moved down to touch her cherk gently. "I've wanted you since the day I met you."

She smiled and leaned forward to kiss him. "You could have had me you know."

His smiled faded and he shook his head. "It wouldn't have been the same.

Her smile disappeared. "I am sorry Tony-"

His finger brushed against her lips hushing her. "You have nothing to be sorry for Ziva." Realization dawned on him. "No no. It's not because of anything to do with Somalia."

Her brow knitted. Tony shifted and pressed her onto her back. He laid directly on top of her and shifted some of his weight so that he wasn't crushing her. Ziva bent her knees and cradled him against her. His free hand began stroking her hair.

"What I meant was… back when we first met. I wanted so you bad that it physically hurt at times. But I think we both know…. If we'd tried… anything… it would have been great sex-" His voice trailed off.

"Amazing mind blowing sex-" She commented.

He smiled and waggled his eyebrows. "Yeah- but we never would have been able to make it last. I think… both of us felt 'it'… but had no idea how to make' it' work."

She smiled softly. "We both had a lot of growing to do… a lot of demons to fight."

He nodded. "We did it together. It was a little… bumpy… along the way sometimes. But when it was all said and done we always emerged together and closer than ever before. And that.. 'it'… that we had before has grown into 'this'. 'This' is absolutely amazing."

Tears began to sting her eyes. "True love." She said softly staring into his eyes.

He stared back at her. "Soul mates." He said just as softly.

She smiled as a single tear trailed down her cheek. She leaned forward and kissed him deeply, pulling him tighter against her. Her left leg slid up and over his back causing him to smile.

Her hand had slid between them and she began to gently stroke him. He smiled. "My little minx."

"Yours and only yours." She whispered.

They quickly became lost in each other until a loud knocking on their door interrupted.

Ziva's thoughts immediately went into overdrive. "It could be Eden." She whispered.

Tony shook his head as he pulled away from her. "She would call first." He stood from the bed and began scanning for his clothes. He leaned over her quickly. "Don't move. I'll be right back." He grabbed a kiss from her and disappeared out the door.

He found his boxers hanging from the doorknob of the spare bedroom. He quickly stepped into them as he called "Coming!" to the impatient knocker at the door.

Tony kicked some clothes under a chair before unlocking and throwing the door open.

"What?"

The knocker was silent for a moment and then smiled. "Well Junior, it looks like I interrupted something. I never would picture you in bed at 8:30 at night."

The color drained from Tony's face. "Dad?"

To Be Continued


	93. Chapter 93

**I hope everyone had a Happy and Joyous holiday!**

**Sorry about the delay between chapters. Between work, the holidays, and the show just not feeding my muse it's been tough to get this chapter out. Hopefully things will change in the next couple of weeks.**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 93**

"Dad?" Tony repeated again, this time a bit more loudly.

Ziva overheard his outburst from the bedroom and slid from the bed quickly grabbing a fresh set of clothes and began putting them on.

In the living room, Tony stood dumbfounded staring at his Father who was smiling at him.

"Well are you just going to stand there Junior or are you going to invite me in?"

Tony snapped out of his shocked state and nodded. "Yeah, yeah come in. Sorry, I just didn't expect to see you."

Anthony Sr turned and spread his arms out. "Well, I got a cryptic message about me being a Grandfather; of course I had to come."

Tony frowned. "I left that message weeks ago Dad. You could have called."

Senior shrugged. "Why? A phone call wouldn't let me see the boy! I went to your old apartment and your coworker gave me this address. I didn't even know you had moved Junior."

Tony frowned as he shut the door. "Yeah, after Jake was born things moved really fast for Ziva and I-"

DiNozzo Sr reached out and touched Tony's arm stopping him in midsentence. "Jake? Ziva? Junior…. Are you telling me that Ziva is the mother of your child?"

Tony let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and smiled. Before he could answer her voice drifted from the doorway. "The one and only."

Anthony turned and flashed a million watt smile in Ziva's direction. "Well, it's about time Junior got his act together. How are you gorgeous?"

Ziva smiled and met him halfway across the room. "I am well. This is a surprise."

The older man didn't bother to answer. He instead glanced around the room. "So, where is this grandson of mine?"

Tony flashed Ziva a look before answering. "At a babysitter."

Ziva smiled in his direction and nodded. "I will go and get him so that the two of you can meet." She said to Senior. She walked past Tony and flashed him a smile and whispered, "Rain check?"

He smiled back and kissed her forehead before she exited the apartment. He turned his attention back to his Father and almost died in the spot he stood.

DiNozzo Sr was holding Ziva's dress that Tony had practically ripped off of her earlier. "I guess I was interrupting something."

Tony's face flushed as he snatched the dress from his hands. "So uh… you just decided to show up instead of calling?"

Senior shrugged. "Okay, I'm guilty. I admit, I was curious to know who this woman is that managed to rope you in-"

Tony immediately felt his anger start to simmer. "Whoa whoa, no one 'roped me in'. Ziva and I are in a committed relationship. I love that little boy more than life itself."

Senior went and sat on the sofa. "So, the pregnancy was planned?"

"Yes! Well, no…" Tony began fumbling for words. "It was planned on her part. Not on mine." DiNozzo Sr's brows furrowed just as Tony realized what he'd said.

"Wait, it wasn't like that." He wanted nothing more than to have his Father see Jacob and fall head over heels in love with him. He wanted it more than anything, not just for Jake's sake, but for his own as well. Maybe, just maybe, with a grandson to flaunt over Tony would be able to build a real relationship with his Father.

But this was starting out all wrong.

"So… how exactly was it?" His father asked.

His palms began to sweat as the words tumbled from his mouth. "Ziva was trying to get pregnant with another man and used my sperm but didn't know she had, and then her friend died and-"

He stopped when he saw the incredulous look on his Father's face.

Senior studied him for several moments. Shocking Tony even further, he suddenly smiled. "Junior, you shouldn't pull your old man's leg like this."

Tony sighed causing his shoulders to sink. "I'm not pulling your leg Dad." He said quietly.

Senior was quiet for several long minutes. He took a deep breath. "So… you stepped in to play Daddy when the man that Ziva chose to be this baby's father died? Junior… what the hell are you thinking?"

Tony knew it was coming but it didn't make it any easier. "It's not what you think Dad." He said even quieter than before.

"Then explain it to me." Senior implored.

"I love Ziva. And I love our son." He started but then stopped.

"So, you, uh.. donated.. in order for Ziva to have a child with someone else?"

"No, Ziva and I were barely speaking when she got pregnant." Tony said quickly hoping the implications would be missed by his Father.

They weren't.

"So, you were barely speaking, she wanted a baby with another man, that didn't work out and she invited you to step right into his shoes?"

Tony was silent. This was going all wrong. All his dreams of his Father holding Jake with a proud smile on his face were going up in smoke. His hope of his Dad telling him how proud he was that Tony was such a great Father were slipping through his fingers.

"Look Dad! Listen, this isn't how I wanted any of this! But Ziva-"He paused when he heard the small sound of the baby behind him. Turning in his chair he was mortified to see Ziva standing in the doorway with Jake lying in her arms.

Her face was a mask of stone, her eyes held nothing but fury. "Sorry if we're interrupting." She practically spat, her tone icy.

Tony's face dropped into his hands. He quickly stood. "Look Ziva."

She held up a finger on her free hand. "Not now." She spat at him as she pulled the baby closer and stormed down the hallway with him.

Tony sighed. "Dad- look…. I'll call you tomorrow. You can meet the baby then."

DiNozzo senior stood "Son, I'm sorry if I started something here. I'm just trying to understand-"

Tony shook him off. "No, this is on me. I'll call you tomorrow."

Senior nodded his head and quietly left, perplexed as ever at what exactly has been going on.

Tony made his way down the hallway and found Jake tucked neatly into his crib. He was already half asleep when Tony looked down at him.

"Hey buddy, it looks like Aunt Eden wore you out. Daddy will see you later." He kissed his fingertips and touched Jake's forehead with them lightly before exiting the room quietly.

He walked gingerly into the master bedroom expecting a tirade to greet him. Instead, he was met with silence.

She was lying in bed, her back towards the door. Tony took note of her dress. Ziva preferred to wear as little as possible to bed. Right now, she was wearing a long sleeve shirt.

'Oh yeah, she's pissed.' He thought.

"Ziva?"

He was met with silence. Her breathing told him that she was still awake.

He moved slowly to the bed and drew back the sheets, sliding gently in and settling a few inches away from her. "Ziva? Talk to me."

She didn't move, however she did sigh loudly.

"Your father did not stay long." She said coldly.

He sighed. He sat up and rested his arms on his knees. "Ziva, you misunderstood what you heard."

She didn't reply. She continued facing away from him for several moments before she did speak.

"No one is forcing you to be here Tony. If this is not what you want you can leave. I will not grab onto you and beg you to stay."

She said the words so softly that he had to strain to hear. But he heard and her words cut him to the core.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean Ziva? Do you really think I don't want to be here?"

He threw the covers back and jumped from the bed. Infuriating him even more was the fact that she never moved…. Never reacted.

"Dammit Ziva, I told you that you misunderstood!"

She turned and looked at him sadly. "Tony, please calm down before you wake the baby." She watched him quietly for several moments. "I did not misunderstand Tony. I heard what you told your Father."

"But it's not what I meant-"

She smiled sadly. "I know. But why can you not tell him that? Why does our situation embarrass you?"

Thinking about the baby he forced himself to take several calming breaths before he moved back to sit next to her on the bed. "I'm not embarrassed."

She sat up and faced him. "Then why not tell him?"

He thought for several moments. "I was hoping that he would want a relationship with Jake, that maybe he and I could start building something more like a Father-son relationship then what we've had my entire life. I thought maybe Jake would help build that bridge."

"Tony-"She took a deep breath. "Why is it that every time your Father is around you revert to an immature little boy who cannot think for himself?"

His first instinct was to argue but deep down, he knew she was right. Something about his Father always brought this out in him. At time, it felt impossible to be the man he'd become around his Father, and he could never understand why.

"I- I don't know. But Ziva… I'm not embarrassed about you or Jake."

She scooted closer to him and turned to nestle into his arms. He gladly pulled her close allowing his head to rest on top of hers.

"Tony?"

"Yeah?"

"I am."

"You are what? Embarrassed?" He pulled back and looked into her eyes. "Why?"

She looked down and began chewing on her bottom lip. "I… I cannot help but wonder. If I had been honest with you sooner. Or I had sat you down and said 'Tony, I am in love with you!'….. what would our lives be? We might have two or three children by now-"

Tony began to stroke her cheek. "Or, we might not have any. Ziva, we can't second guess the past. Yeah, our lives may be better than it is now. Or… it might be worse. We may have tried to be together before we were ready… I mean fully, truly ready…and it could have been a disaster."

She leaned down and kissed his wrist as he continued to stroke her cheek. "You think that we are ready now?"

He smiled and nodded. "You better believe it. I will fight to my dying breath to keep what we have here."

She looked at him knowingly but didn't say anything further. Her silent communication caused him to smile.

"And that's what I plan on telling my Father tomorrow. He'll either welcome you and Jake into his life or he'll have no place in mine. Not anymore."

"I would hate for it to come to that." She said quietly as she settled into his chest again.

"Yeah, me too. But nothing is more important than you and Jake. If my Father won't accept that then I don't need him in my life."

Ziva clung to him for a short while before pulling away again. She smiled softly and teased; "With the role models we have, we will be lucky if Jake is not in therapy by the time he starts kindergarten."

To Be Continued


	94. Chapter 94

**Ugh, if only there were more hours in the day and more days of the week, then maybe there wouldn't be such long pauses between chapters. My apologies.**

**Thank you to all of you who have written during this little hiatus. Fear not, I will not be giving up this story until it's completed. Your support means the world to me and always brings a smile to my face. For that, I cannot thank you all enough!**

**Disclaimer still applies.**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 94**

The following morning had started out all wrong. Jake had woken up at least four times during the night. Tony and Ziva had taken turns tending to him. On her second trip back to bed, Tony has noticed that she didn't look well.

By the time the sun had started peeking into the sanctuary of their bedroom, Tony could hear Ziva sniffling. He forced the sleepiness from his mind and focused on her.

That was when he saw the box of tissues next to the bed. "Are you okay?" He asked kissing her shoulder.

She sniffled and shook her head. "I feel like someone ran me over with a train." She replied, her voice stuffy.

He felt her forehead and frowned. "You feel a little warm."

Jake began screeching in the other room. Ziva struggled to sit up.

"No no, I've got him. Just stay in bed and rest."

She appeared ready to argue but the pounding in her head made her think twice about it. She settled back into her pillows and pulled the tissue box closer.

Tony went in to get Jake ready for the day but stopped dead in his tracks. Apparently, Jake's diaper thought this morning would be a good day to leak.

Oh, and it wasn't just a little leak… it was one that had managed to leave a brownish/greenish/yellowish stain all up his back and down his legs.

"What the hell Jake, did you explode?" He asked with a disgusted look on his face. Jake heard his Dad's tone and stopped crying focusing on his face for several seconds before smiling a broad, toothless smile at him.

"Yeah, ha ha, very funny. " Tony let the amused baby lay there for a moment as he prepared a bath for him. Walking back into the bedroom, he noticed that the baby now thought it was funny to smear the mess all over his crib sheets as well.

"Well, one thing at a time. Come on buddy." Tony managed to get the messy baby into the bath without too much of a problem. Jake had recently learned that if he kicked his feet and waved his hands it would splash water and make bubbles, yet another thing that amused him immensely.

Happy that the baby was clean, Tony wrapped him in a towel and took him to his changing table. "One clean little man, coming right up."

Tony had barely gotten his diaper fastened when he heard a knock on the door. His brow furrowed. "Now, who could that be?" He asked the baby, not really expecting an answer.

Jake took a deep breath, almost as if he was doing to answer. But he released it and chose to smile at Tony instead. "Are you faking Daddy out?" Tony couldn't help but smile. "Come on; let's go see who's at the door."

Tony grabbed a one piece snap up outfit for Jake and carried the half-naked baby to the door with him. Jake had his had settled on Tony's shoulder, his little hand curled into a ball against his neck. Tony loved it when Jake sat like this. He could feel his light breathing against his neck. It reminded him again of the love he felt for this little boy.

Opening the door, Tony frowned at seeing his own Father standing there. "Dad." Tony sighed. "I told you I would call."

Senior smiled but shook his head. "I know you did Junior. But the truth is… I felt bad about how we left things last night. I wanted to make sure we had the opportunity to talk."

Tony sighed again but stepped back to let his Father enter. Senior glanced around the apartment before turning back to Tony and the baby.

"Ziva's not here?" He asked, his brow furrowed.

Tony shook his head. "She's resting. She woke up with a cold this morning."

Senior nodded and stepped forward to get a closer look at the baby. "So, you must be Jacob."

Jake turned his head in the direction of the strange voice. He focused his dark eyes on Senior but remained expressionless.

Tony saw the odd position his father was standing in so he turned Jake around until he was sitting in the crook of his arm with his back against Tony's chest.

Jake continued to look at the older man in puzzlement. He didn't know this voice, or this person.

Senior straightened and then leaned to look into the baby's face. "Boy, you are a handsome one, aren't you?" He asked before reaching a finger out to tickle the baby's bare belly. Jake reached out and took Senior's finger in his hand touching it gently before looking at the older man again and lighting up into a huge smile.

It was a DiNozzo smile, through and through; one that would show dozens of teeth (if he had any), light up a room, and charm any woman within a half mile radius.

It wasn't lost on Senior. "Come here boy, let me see you." Before Tony knew what had happened, his Dad had taken Jake from his arms. He also took the clothing from Tony's hand. Sitting on the couch, Tony watched in amazement as Senior had Jake dressed within seconds.

"Uh, will you be okay with him for a minute? I want to check on Ziva."

Senior looked away from the baby and focused incredulously on his son. "You might want to put some clothes on too Junior."

Tony glanced down and then blushed realizing he was still in nothing but his boxers. He smiled nervously and nodded before disappearing down the hallway.

Ziva raised her weary head from the pillow. "Is that you Father I hear?"

Tony nodded as he grabbed a pair of sweat pants and a tee shirt to throw on. "Yeah. He decided he couldn't wait and just showed up."

Ziva began to wearily push the blankets back. She stopped however when Tony placed a hand gently on her arm.

"I… I have to do this." He said softly.

She stopped and nodded huddling back under the covers. "Okay."

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. "Do you want me to bring you some cold medicine?"

She shook her head. "I'll be fine in a couple of days. I just do not want to breathe in the baby's face."

Tony nodded and smiled. "I better get back out there before Dad has Jake drinking a brandy and smoking a cigar."

Ziva chuckled which prompted a light coughing fit. Tony smiled sympathetically and kissed her forehead again. "I love you. Now rest."

Her eyes twinkled. "Even like this?"

He stood and moved towards the door. "Yep, even when you're gross." He knew it was coming but it didn't stop him from laughing when one of the pillows from the bed hit him in the back.

"Just for that I am going to spread my germs all over your pillow."

Tony laughed as he went down the hallway. He stopped at the entrance to the living room and watched his Dad with Jake.

He was talking softly to the baby, so soft that Tony couldn't make out what he was saying. He was holding Jake in front of him using his arms as support. The baby was definitely enjoying the attention being lavished on him.

Tony cleared his throat slightly and walked into the kitchen, pulling a bottle from the refrigerator and placing it in the warmer.

"I will say this Tony. No matter how you did it, you and Ziva made a handsome little boy."

Tony was quiet for a few moments as he waited for the bottle to finish. The warmer popped off and Tony wiped the access water off before walking over and taking Jake from his Father.

His thoughts drifted to something he'd read about some breastfed babies not taking well to bottle feedings. Although Jake didn't get them often, he didn't seem to care one way or another where his food was coming from, just as long as he was getting it.

Sure enough, as soon as the bottle touched his lips he latched quickly onto it and began filling his belly. He watched his Father curiously, batting his eyelashes from time to time. Tony knew that he could sense something different was happening.

"Does it really matter to you how he came to be?" Tony asked softly.

Senior sat back on the sofa and watched Tony with the baby. "Of course not. I was trying to understand."

Tony nodded and watched the baby for several moments. "It took Ziva and I a long time to understand too Dad. Way too long."

Senior watched Tony, silently waiting for him to continue.

"Ziva and I have loved each other for a long time Dad. We just… we just couldn't find a way to tell each other."

Tony gave his Father credit. The elder man sat and listened quietly although his eyes were filled with questions.

"She and I…. we come from such different worlds. But the moment we met there was just this… something. And to tell you the truth, it scared the hell out of me."

The baby squirmed slightly in his arms drawing Tony's attention back to him. He readjusted his head so he was more comfortable with the bottle. Satisfied that Jake was happy again, Tony continued.

"Ziva and I danced around each other… dangerously at times… and then it just seemed like it was too late."

"Why was it too late?" Tony Sr. asked.

"I… I made some poor choices. She made some poor choices. They piled on top of each other and before I knew it…. She was gone." His voice trailed off slightly.

"Gone?" His father asked.

Tony nodded. "Back to Israel. We didn't hear from her for months and then we received word that she was dead. I just… my life fell apart Dad. I couldn't fathom living my life without her in it."

The double meaning of his words was not lost on his Father. Tony Sr. gently rubbed at his face before taking a deep breath. "Obviously… your information was wrong."

Tony nodded but didn't elaborate anymore. "By the time she came home… there was such a chasm in our friendship… I had to push everything else aside and just concentrate on getting my friend back. Before I knew it, she was in a relationship with someone else and expecting a baby."

Senior's brows knit together again as Tony glanced adoringly down at the baby. "Obviously, we still had to work on our communications skills a little more. I saw her spending time with this man named Joshua. The next thing I knew he'd moved here to Washington. And then I got smacked with a ton of bricks when I found out she was pregnant. "Tony smiled as the baby waved his hand in the air towards his Daddy.

Tony continued the G version of their tale. "I was wrong. They were lifelong friends. He had gone through two battles with cancer already. She had given up on finding love and wanted to be a Mother. He wanted a chance to be a Father. So they went the In Vitro route."

"Son, I don't mean to sound insensitive…. But wasn't it a tad bit selfish of Ziva to ask you to donate?"

Tony smiled. "She didn't ask me. I had donated a couple of times when I was in college. I needed the money. And then I donated here in D.C. I didn't need the money of course, I just.. well it was stupid. But I did it. And I'm glad I did." He looked down at the little wonder in his arms and smiled before taking the empty bottle from him and moving him up to his shoulder.

"So… they chose you?"

Tony shook his head. "No. She didn't know. Josh knew about her feelings for me. I guess he hoped that one day we would finally be together. And he wanted to give us a chance to have a child of our own. He chose me and didn't tell her. She found out the same time I did."

"And where is this-Josh- person?"

Tony's eyes dropped. "He didn't tell Ziva, but he was already sick. His cancer had come out of remission… even before she was pregnant. Ziva and I had finally started on the road towards each other when he got really sick. He was satisfied that she would be happy and Jake would have a Father… so he didn't fight. He just let the cancer take him."

Senior sat back on the couch as he processed what he had been told. Tony took the opportunity to do the one thing he'd wanted to do since he was a small child… pour his heart out to his Father.

"I love them Dad… so much. It wouldn't matter to me if Jake wasn't biologically mine. I'm his Daddy. When he wants his Daddy it's ME that he wants. This-"he stuck out his finger that Jake currently had his entire fist wrapped around. "This… it's the most amazing feeling in the world. I've never felt love… or have been loved like I have been since Ziva and I got together. I never knew that life… MY life… could feel like this."

Tony turned Jake around so that he was sitting on his lap. Jake's head rested back on Tony's stomach as his eyes searched around the room.

"For a long time… I blamed you, for all the failures in my life. I'll tell you right here Dad…. You weren't the greatest Father. But now I can appreciate it… I know what mistakes not to make with my children. I'm an adult… I make my own decisions. I make my own mistakes. I can't blame you. I can only blame myself. But I will not make those same mistakes. I never want Jacob to ever… ever… feel like I did growing up. I want him to feel happy and loved every moment of his life. If he has a nightmare, I'm going to be there to comfort him. I'll be there for all his games, all his parent teacher conferences… and most importantly… I'll be there when he needs me."

Tony's eyes were glassy as be bent and kissed Jake on top of the head. Jake tried to turn his head in Tony's direction but his coordination wasn't quite 'there' just yet. Frustrated he just settled on turning his head to the side and waiting for more affection from his Daddy.

"Son-"Senior's voice was heavy. "I know I wasn't the best Father to you. I can understand your feelings. But just answer me… are you TRULY happy?"

Tony didn't hesitate. "Absolutely."

Senior smiled. "Then so am I." He gestured towards the baby. "Maybe… you can teach your old man some tricks, huh?"

Junior smiled. "Oh, if there's anyone who is going to teach anybody tricks it's this guy." He gestured towards the baby causing Senior to smile.

He slapped his hands on his knees before rising. "Well, let me get off to the meetings I have today. That way you can get your day started. I would like to spend some more time with all of you before I have to leave."

Tony smiled. "We'd like that. Let me see how Ziva is feeling later. Maybe you can come over for dinner?"

Senior smiled. "I'd like that. " He stood from the couch and went over to where his son and grandson were sitting. He bent down until he was eye level with Jake. "Welcome to the family Jacob."

He clapped Tony on the shoulder and exited the apartment. Tony sat for several moments absorbing what had just happened. He glanced up to see Ziva, red nose and all, leaning up against the wall between the hallway and living room.

"How much of that did you hear?" He asked.

She smiled. "All of it. I'm proud of you Tony."

He stood and held his free arm out welcoming her into his embrace. All three settled onto the couch where his Father had been just moments before. Jake was still laying back against his stomach, Ziva cuddled against the other side of his chest.

He kissed the top of Jake's head, then Ziva's forehead. "I'm proud of US Ziva. Everything just feels so perfect right now."

She suddenly took a deep breath and unleashed three sneezes in quick succession. "Well… except that-"

The sound of her blowing her nose was his only reply.

To Be continued


	95. Chapter 95

**No excuses for the long delay, just apologies. My muse has been in a nasty, nasty mood. **

**However, there's a little shout out in this chapter to a big fan of the story who reminds me on Twitter (almost daily LOL) about how much she misses Baby Jake. Well, here he is! **

**And again, a reminder that I do not have children of my own. The development, struggles of new parents, and everyday changes for both Mom and baby come from my experiences with friends and my God children. If something is off... blame it on my lack of experience. LOL**

**Disclaimer still applies**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 95**

Once Jake had settled for his afternoon nap, Tony had crawled into bed next to Ziva to try to catch some sleep. She still wasn't feeling well, although she told him that she was feeling better. He wasn't sure if he believed her but decided against picking a possible argument with her.

He should have felt guilt about sleeping with the never ending pile of laundry, dirty dishes and toys lying all over the apartment. He was due to go back to work next week, Ziva two weeks after that, and honestly, he didn't know how in the hell they were going to manage.

He'd raised his concerns to Ziva before. She'd just smiled and reminded him that there are millions or working parents around the world who manage just fine every day. Tony felt kind of silly raising his concerns but deep down couldn't help but think…. He and Ziva weren't a typical couple; they didn't have a typical everyday job. And Jake was too special to be an everyday typical baby. At least Tony thought so.

But lack of sleep was consuming him. If he just closed his eyes for twenty minutes he could wake up and get to work on the apartment. Unfortunately, he'd slept longer than he's intended. By the time his eyes had opened the shadows in the room had shifted and Ziva's side of the bed was empty and cold.

Tony stumbled out of the bathroom and into the main living area. Ziva was bent over the dishwasher loading dirty dishes in. Jake was sitting in his bouncy chair on the counter top.

Ziva had music playing and was singing softly. Tony stopped next to Jake and just listened to her. Jake turned his head towards his Daddy with a toothless smile on his face. He then turned back to his Mommy's voice and lifted up his hand waving it in front of his face and focusing his eyes on it.

Tony snuck up behind Ziva and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her tight against him. She didn't startle which led Tony to believe she knew he was there the entire time. She smiled and stood, wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning her head back on his shoulder.

They unconsciously began to sway to the music. Tony softly kissed the side of her head. "You have a beautiful voice."

She flushed slightly and smiled. "Thank you."

"How do you feel?" He asked, noting that her skin felt cooler than it had earlier.

"Much better. I gave in and had Eden pick me up some medicine." She confessed. Tony could see the displeasure in her face. "I knew I would have gotten over it in a few days but I would rather take the medicine than risk getting the baby sick."

Tony smiled. "You sound sexier when you're not all stuffed up." He joked.

She chuckled and turned in his arms. He pulled her tighter and simply held her. "You are distracting me." She pointed out to him.

"I don't care." He whispered enjoying the simple feel of having her in his embrace.

Jake made a loud sound which sounded like a cross between a squawk and a squeak causing them to both turn to him. He was still fascinated by his hands as if they were the most incredible thing in the world.

"What time is his appointment tomorrow?" Tony asked.

"0800. And then we have an appointment at the daycare at the Navy Yard at 0930. If we approve, we can finalize what his schedule will be and get all of the paperwork taken care of."

Tony nodded and watched as she turned back to the dishwasher. He leaned against the counter for several moments before he spoke again.

"Are you sure this is what you want to do?" He asked.

She didn't cease her movements. "What do you mean?"

Tony glanced over at the baby who had now stopped staring at his hands and was now waving them wildly in front of his face causing his eyes to cross slightly.

"Well, I know that you and Josh had picked out a different daycare for him-" His voice trailed off.

Ziva stopped and grabbed a dishtowel to wipe her hands. "We cannot afford that daycare Tony."

He sighed. "I know, but I've got money in savings-"

She shook her head. "The choice of a daycare had always been a point of contention between Josh and I. I adored him, but sometimes he let money take over his good sense. He wanted him to go to that pretentious day care, not me."

"Don't you mean prestigious?"

She shook her head. "No, I meant pretentious. Josh wanted to raise Jake like he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Together, Josh and I had the means to provide that to him. I gave in to Josh on the choice of daycare only because he promised to allow me to pick his school when the time came. I think he secretly thought he could sway my decision with that when the time came. But whatever-" She waved her hand in the air. Taking Tony's arm, she turned him in Jake's direction.

"Look at him. Does he look like the type of baby that should be going to a daycare that has parents on the waiting list PAYING people off to get into it?"

Tony watched Jake as he stared at his hands some more. Noticing that his parents were staring at him, he dropped his hands and smiled brightly causing them to smile back.

Ziva shrugged and teased, "Besides, I have never heard of an NBA player having graduated the John Henry Thornton Sauvestre Academy."

Tony's eyes turned dreamy at the thought of Jake being an NBA player. He turned to Ziva. "Who the hell is John Henry Thornton Sauvestre?"

Ziva shrugged. "Exactly!" She smiled softly. "Plus, if he is at the Navy yard, one or both of us might be able to go over and see him if we have a day with some down time."

"And Eden doesn't mind the extra drive if there's a night when we're stuck there and she's picking him up?"

Ziva shook her head. "No. And my Mother's office is not too far away. She's willing to pitch in and help too if we need it."

Tony smiled. "We've got an amazing family."

Ziva nodded. "Unconventional yes, but they are ours. They love us as much as we love them. And all of us love Jake."

At the mention of his name he turned his head again. Tony and Ziva both laughed at how much he loved being the center of attention.

She'd never voice it out loud, but she knew who he inherited THAT from.

* * *

Dinner with Tony Sr. had gone wonderfully. Jake didn't fuss the entire time Sr. was at the apartment. He'd been given his bath and went down in his crib without making a sound.

Tony and Ziva had quickly cleaned up the kitchen again, and since she wasn't able to breastfeed because of the cold medicine she had taken earlier in the day, they sat back and enjoyed a glass of wine while watching a movie cuddled together on the couch.

They'd gone to bed early knowing the busy day they had tomorrow. The wine had relaxed Ziva immensely and before Tony was even under the blankets she'd stripped down to almost nothing and pressed him to the mattress. They made love quietly and slowly, luxuriating in sharing themselves with each other. Sweaty exhaustion finally won over and they dozed off to sleep still wrapped in one another.

* * *

The following morning was busy. Though not regretting the previous evening, they were now thinking twice about it as they woke up and had less than ninety minutes to get Jake to his appointment with John. Breakfast for them would have to wait as Tony fed Jake a bottle while Ziva pumped her breast milk and dumped it down the drain.

She was frowning when she'd appeared out of the bedroom and began washing up the breast pump. Tony was in the process of burping Jake.

"What's wrong?"

She stopped for a moment and turned to him. "Something has changed with my breast milk."

Tony thought for a moment. "Maybe it's because of the medicine? Or the wine?"

She shook her head. "I cannot breast feed because the medication or the wine will get passed to him. It should not affect my milk production. But I noticed that this started before I was sick. He used to get full nursing from one breast. Now, he wants to eat from both almost every time he nurses." She thought for several moments. "I will talk to John about it today." She decided.

Tony nodded and took Jake into his room to change him from pajamas to a jumper. Ziva was packing his diaper bag for the long day ahead of them. Tony had already placed the stroller by the door.

They got to the doctor's office right on time. By the time they unloaded Jake, got him in his stroller, got his diaper bag loaded and bustled into the office, they were a few minutes late. Angela simply smiled at them and told them to go right back into exam room 1.

John came in soon after with a large cup of coffee in his hand. He smiled sheepishly as he gulped the last bit down and tossed the cup away. "Doctor's rounds at the hospital before office hours kill me all the time."

Tony and Ziva smiled. John weighed Jake and quickly jotted the info into his chart. He studied his prior entries closely.

"How is he nursing?" He asked.

Ziva's stomach clenched. "He still eats fairly regularly. It just seems like he's not getting enough."

John studied his chart again. "Well, the good news is that he's gained weight since the last time he was here. To be honest, I would like to have seen more of a gain. Have you made any changes to your diet since his last appointment?"

Ziva shook her head. Tony could see the worry on her face and placed his hand on her back.

"How often is he nursing?" John asked.

"Every two to three hours. But… he started nursing from both breasts now. Before it was just one and every once in a while he would want more. Now it seems that every time he nurses he eats from both-" Her voice trailed off.

John listened sympathetically as she continued. "It has… felt…like I'm not producing as much as I used to. Even when my breasts are full it does not… feel… like the same amount."

John nodded. "I need to talk to you about something… I'm not sure if you want to do it alone."

Ziva immediately shook her head and reached for Tony's hand. "No, whatever you need to say can be said with Tony here."

John smiled at the wall of support they displayed together. "Well, I don't know about your past Ziva. I know Jake's. I know you went to my wife for In Vitro. Infertile women and high risk pregnancies are her specialty. However-"

Ziva shifted uncomfortable. "However?" She repeated softly.

"I know you were a patient of my wife's long before Jacob came along. I don't know your history, nor can she share it with me without your consent… but has anything happened in your past that could affect your milk production now?"

Ziva was at a complete loss for words. As hard as she'd worked to put Somalia behind her, the nightmare never seemed to be completely 100% out of her life.

"I…. I do not know-" Her stomach wretched at the thought that now, years after she's been rescued, Saleem's imprisonment could be harming Jake as well.

The contents of her empty stomach suddenly churned causing Ziva to sprint from her seat to the sink as she vomited the contents of her stomach. Tony was immediately at her side as John picked Jake up from the exam table.

He moved to the wall and pushed a call button that was there. A nurse appeared immediately. "Go get my wife, please." He muttered quietly to her.

She glanced quickly at the sight of Ziva leaning over the sink and Tony holding her hair. She nodding quickly and hurried from the room.

Tony was whispering quiet words to Ziva who quickly rinsed her mouth and turned to collapse into his arms. After several moments, Ziva turned to John. "Sorry about your sink." She muttered.

He smiled as he rocked Jake on his shoulder. "Please. I'm a pediatrician. I deal with puke all day along." He joked.

Ziva smiled and rinsed the sink as Amie appeared in the doorway.

"What's going on?" She asked alarmed at being summonsed as she was.

John communicated with her to wait for Ziva to get herself together. Ziva moved back to her seat with Tony still pressed to her side. John moved back towards the exam table but didn't put Jake down. He began to explain his concern to Amie who didn't speak. She merely listened and then turned to Ziva.

"What did you tell him?" She asked.

Ziva didn't make eye contact. "I- I could not."

Amie smiled sympathetically at her husband and moved to kneel in front of Ziva. "We talked about this being a possibility Ziva."

She nodded. "I know. I just… I do not want any of the horrors I went through to EVER touch my children-"

Amie was quiet for a moment. "That would be wonderful in an ideal world. But Ziva, we don't live in a fairy tale. These things happened to you. How are you going to explain your scars to Jake the first time he asks? Are you ever going to tell Jake how he really came to be?"

Ziva looked at her and Tony's joined hands. "I… have not thought much about it."

Amie nodded silently.

"Before you got pregnant, we went over some of the dangers you would face. Do you remember?"

Ziva nodded. She turned to look at Tony before lifting their joined hands and kissing him on the knuckles. She then turned her gaze to Amie.

"Everything has been so perfect that I did not think anything could hurt us."

Amie smiled sympathetically and placed a hand on her shoulder. "This isn't hurting you Ziva. This is doing what's best for your son."

Ziva looked over at the baby who was laying on John's shoulder staring at her. Her eyes began to tear as all the love she felt for him boiled to the surface.

"I- I spent several months as a prisoner in terrorist camp. I was starved and when fed was given rotten food, very little water. When I returned, I was severely underweight."

John's professional mask slipped into place. "What lasting affects has it had?"

Amie spoke up. "She had a horrible time with nutrient absorption. When she was first admitted to the hospital her body couldn't even handle a banana bag. After she recovered she's suffered from bouts of gastroenteritis, weight gain and rapid loss. Her primary care doctor monitors her with blood and urine tests every 12 weeks. Her prescription vitamins are adjusted accordingly. When she was pregnant, I immediately ran tests every month to check her nutrient levels. She did very well while she was pregnant, even thru morning sickness. However, I worried if her body would be able to last through breast feeding."

Ziva protested. "He's barely over eight weeks old!" Tony squeezed her hand in comfort.

Amie turned to glance at her husband.

"Ziva, has Jake had formula before?" He asked.

Tony spoke up. "He's had it a couple of times."

John nodded. Seeing at how this was affecting Ziva, he smiled sympathetically. "Ziva, having to bottle feed the baby isn't so terrible. He's gotten a great start with the breastfeeding that he did have. If you have any older milk in storage go ahead and use it. When did you notice the change in your milk production?"

"About a week ago."

He nodded. "Okay, then you know what to use and what not to use. You know how he acts when he's hungry. If he drinks the breast milk and seems like he wants more, give it to him. "

She nodded and leaned into Tony's shoulder. Amie squeezed Ziva's shoulder and took Jake from her husband. She smiled at the bright eyed baby and turned him in her arms to face Ziva.

"Ziva. Look at me." She ordered.

Ziva immediately looked up and saw Jake staring down intently at his Mommy. Ziva smiled at him while lit up his face. His toothless smile was so large that he waved his hands before shoving his fingers into his mouth.

"Ziva, does this sweet little angel look like he's been touched by that evil at all?" Amie asked softly.

Ziva's eyes watered again although only one lone tear slid down her cheek. "No." She admitted.

Amie nodded. "No." She agreed. "I see a little boy who is happy and healthy. He adores his parents and loves his life."

As if he knew what she was saying, Jake turned his head up and looked at Amie. "Dontcha you smart little boy. You know I'm talking about you, don't you?" She asked.

Jake pulled his now slobber filled fingers out of his mouth and watched her for a moment before deciding she was okay and smiling.

John laughed. "Wow, you two are going to be beating girls off with a stick when he gets older."

Amie hugged the drooling baby who was eating his fingers again. "Okay you, time for you to finish getting examined." She handed the baby back to John but turned to Ziva. "Are you okay?"

She nodded. "Yes. I just- I do not want anything to harm him."

Amie chuckled. "Oh, I've NEVER heard that from a parent before."

She stayed while John finished the baby's exam. Jake passed the rest of his exam with flying colors. Jake's easy going smiling manner disappeared quickly when he received his eight week immunizations.

Ziva seemed lost in thought as they got Jake packed back into his stroller. Before Amie left the room, Ziva touched her arm. "Let… let John see my file if he wants to. If something else comes up in regards to Jake… I want him to know."

Amie nodded and pulled Ziva into a tight hug. "I'm so proud of you." She whispered.

Ziva smiled and joined Tony and the screaming baby in the hallway. The waiting room that had been empty when they arrived was now full of children and harried parents. They stopped and made an appointment to bring Jake back in two weeks as John suggested. It would merely be to weigh him but definitely important.

Once the SUV was packed again and Jake safely in his car seat, they glanced at the clock on the dashboard. They would be pushing it to make the appointment at the Navy Yard.

"Hold on to your booties Jake!" Tony joked as they sped out of the driveway and back onto the street.

* * *

Tony and Ziva were both very pleased with the day care at the Navy Yard. And their hours were certainly conducive to all Navy personnel, including NCIS Agents. Their hours were from 7am-6pm, perfect for drop off and pick up. The classes weren't too crowded and there was even an outdoor playground for the children.

Jake wasn't his usual charming self but he did at least behave himself. Once all the paperwork was signed and the schedule arranged, they decided to slip over to NCIS to visit with their friends.

Peeking out of the elevator Tony made sure there were no dangerous suspects anywhere before wheeling Jake's stroller into bullpen. Jake was starting to doze but his eyes snapped wide awake when he saw they were in a new place.

Gibbs bit back the grin that threatened to overtake his scowl when he saw them come off of the elevator. He rose from his desk and went to pick up his grandson.

"What are you guys doing here?" Gibbs asked.

Tony glanced around and took in the sight of the bullpen. He winced however at seeing Duane's belongings on Ziva's desk.

Gibbs caught the look on his face. "Don't worry. They'll be moved by the time she comes back." He promised.

Ziva smiled wearily. "We were at the daycare getting the paperwork in order and figured we would stop by for a visit."

McGee called down to Abby to let her know that Tony and Ziva were there. She arrived with Ducky and Jimmy but approached wearily when she saw the baby. Jake was back to smiling at everyone with all the attention he was getting. As soon as it was Abby's turn to take him his smile dropped. He laid in her arms looking warily at her.

Abby finally conceded. "Yeah Jake I know. No matter how much I want you to you just don't like me." His face turned red as if he was getting ready to scream. She quickly passed him to Ziva. He began to squirm in Ziva's arms.

"It is not that he doesn't like you Abby, he's hungry." Tony tried to explain. Gibbs gestured to the side. "Ziva, the conference room is empty if you want to feed him."

His brow furrowed as he saw Ziva's face fall slightly. Tony pulled a bottle out of Jake's diaper bag. "Not necessary. We've got lunch right here."

Jimmy scampered off to the break room to heat the bottle for them as Jake continued to squirm. Jimmy returned moments later with the bottle at the perfect temperature according to Ziva's wrist test.

"Very good Jimmy." She congratulated him.

He smiled and watched in awe as Jake greedily drank from the bottle. Everyone went back to work with the exception of Gibbs who stayed with them. "You ready to come back to work DiNozzo?"

Tony smiled. "Sort of?" He said trying to sum up all the emotions running within him.

Gibbs nodded. He sipped the ever present coffee cup in his hand before speaking again. "When both of you are back, there's going to be some new ground rules. Duane's going to be staying on as a permanent team member."

Tony and Ziva glanced at each other as the news sank in. "One of you will be going home at a decent hour every night. It's up to you two to decide. If we're at a crime scene, one of you will ride back with the first available means of transportation, even if it's with Ducky and Palmer."

Neither Tony nor Ziva spoke, they merely nodded. "If, for any reason, I see this 'situation' affecting your work at all, we'll have to make more changes. Do you both understand what that means?"

Tony and Ziva both knew not to argue. "Yes Gibbs." They whispered at the same time. Gibbs rolled his eyes. 'Great, now they're even speaking alike.' He thought to himself.

"Good. Now, this weekend, your Mother and I are heading to Stillwater to visit my Dad. You three are invited along if you want to come."

The sudden shift between BossGibbs to FatherGibbs surprised them both "Well… Jake just had some shots today so we'll see how he's feeling. When are you leaving?"

"Friday morning. Heading back on Sunday afternoon."

Tony and Ziva nodded. "We'll see how he's doing and let you know." Tony told him. Gibbs nodded and touched the baby's cheek as Tony and Ziva started to pack Jake up again.

Once they were back in their car heading home Tony suddenly turned to Ziva. "Ut oh… Gibbs is taking your Mom home to meet his Dad."

Ziva chuckled. "That is not all."

Tony stopped at a traffic light and turned to her. "What do you mean?"

Ziva turned to him and smiled. "He is taking a day off of work to take my Mother to meet his father." She pointed out.

Tony glanced outside to see if it was raining fire. Surely the world was coming to an end.

To be Continued


	96. Chapter 96

**My apologies to those of you who follow me on Twitter. I know I promised you this chapter a couple of days ago. I got distracted. =(**

**Just a short chapter this time around. However, it's leading up to some big things….. g**

**Again, thanks so much to everyone who had reviewed and sent messages. I appreciate you taking the time to reach out to me!**

**Disclaimer still applies**

* * *

**"Just One More" Chapter 96**

Tony and Ziva had their hands full from the moment they left the Navy Yard. Jake had become so restless that Tony was forced to pull over so Ziva could switch to the backseat in a futile attempt to bring comfort to the cranky baby.

Arriving at home, Jake's occasional outbursts turned into all out screams by the time they reached their front door. They quickly bustled him inside and got him out of his carrier. He'd sit quietly in Tony's arms but it would never last.

To make matters worse, Jake's biggest source of comfort had always been laying skin to skin with Ziva. However, now every time she would hold him, he'd immediately search out her breast and then scream even louder when it was denied.

He drank from the bottle just fine for Tony. But with Ziva it became an absolute struggle that Jake seemed to win each time. Frustration finally set in and Ziva thrust Jake and the bottle to Tony before bursting into tears herself.

Tony felt terrible but he couldn't console her and Jake at the same time. Before he could think of something to say to her she'd left the room leaving him alone with the screaming baby.

After another few minutes, Jake just didn't have enough energy left to continue to cry. He's fallen asleep with the fat wet tears still rolling down his pudgy cheeks.

Tony sat stunned, afraid to move a muscle in fear of waking the baby. However, his concern for Ziva was also weighing on his mind. As gentle as he could he carried Jake into his bedroom and laid him in his crib. He stirred slightly but did not wake.

Tony grabbed the baby monitor off of its charger and went to their bedroom to find Ziva. She was sitting against their headboard, a pillow clutched against her chest.

She spoke before he could. "I am useless." She said softly.

His heart broke. He quickly moved to sit next to her on the bed. "No you're not. Ziva what's wrong?"

"Jake does not want me." She said softly. Tony reached out to pull her to him. She allowed it, but remained stiff in his arms.

"Of course he wants you. Ziva he's just not feeling well from his shots. Plus, being bottle fed all the time is a change for him. He'll get used to it."

She shrugged and pulled away. "I was doing some research online." She pointed to her Ipad lying on the bed. "I have to continue to pump a small amount of milk to alleviate the pain." She gestured towards the device. Tony picked it up and began reading the article.

"Okay, well this seems easy enough. Wear a snug fitting bra. Check. No warm water and use cool compresses a few times a day. Check." His jovial tone of voice was a weak attempt to pull her out of her bad mood.

She understood and smiled ever so slightly in appreciation. "Also, no direct stimulation." She pointed out, attempting to match his tone.

"Yes no dir- wait… what?" He asked suddenly not liking the sound of this.

She chuckled. "You heard me. Hands off Mister."

"But-but-"He stuck his bottom lip out like a child causing her to laugh. She launched herself into his arms and held him tightly.

"Thank you." She whispered into his ear.

"For what?" He asked rubbing her back while he held her close.

"For being you. For loving me." She said softly.

He smiled and kissed the side of her head several times in succession. "Better get used to it. Nothing will ever change that."

Before she could reply Jake's cry shattered the peaceful few moments they had been given. Tony moved to get him but Ziva shook her head. "No, you go grab a shower. I will get him."

Tony listened on the monitor as Ziva went into the baby's room. She spoke softly to Jake who continued to scream. Finally, he settled slightly when she scooped him up from the crib and held him close. He began to nestle against her breast. She moved him away and further up onto her shoulder which brought the screaming back.

She went into the kitchen and pulled a bottle from the fridge. She begged the bottle warmer to hurry. Once it was completed she settled with Jake on the sofa and attempted to give him the bottle.

He bulked immediately, spitting out the nipple and turning his head away so he could let his displeasure be known. Ziva closed her eyes and centered herself. She really was at wits end and having Jake so upset was fraying her nerves.

Opening her eyes again, she softly began speaking to Jake. He cried for several more moments before hearing Ziva' voice and calming himself again. He turned his tear stained face towards his Mommy and focused on her voice. Before he knew what was happening, she'd slipped the bottle between his lips and he began drinking greedily.

She smiled and sighed in relief. "That's my good boy. Fill your belly up." She soothed. She buried her feelings deep down in an effort to keep him calm.

Ziva heard the shower start, run for a period of time and then turn off. Jake was still working on the bottle. But that was okay. She could sit like this with him all night.

Tony appeared a few moments later clad only in a towel. Ziva was still speaking softly to Jake whose eyes were closing for periods of time and then reopening so he could drink more.

Ziva's eyebrows rose when she saw Tony. "Are you planning on sleeping like that?" She asked.

He glanced down at himself and shook his head. "No, I was just-"And then he caught the look on her face. "Uh-maybe?"

She smirked. "Better." She replied causing him to smile. He loved it when she teased him like this.

Jake had finally drained the bottle. She moved him to her shoulder to burp him. Jake put in very little effort but instead began to squirm. Tony disappeared and then reappeared a few moments later with some Infant's Tylenol. "I think we held off long enough."

She nodded and rubbed Jake's back while Tony measured out the proper dose. Ziva moved Jake back into her arms as Tony bent and put the dropper into his mouth dispensing the medication. Jake immediately scrunched his face up.

Ziva laughed. "What's the matter Jake, did that not taste good?"

He focused his dark eyes on his Mommy and much to his parent's relief, graced them with a toothless smile. Almost as if he was giving them a message, he pulled his hands up tightly to himself and allowed his eyes to drift closed.

Ziva smirked. "I think we have been dismissed." She told Tony.

While Ziva put the baby in his crib, Tony went into the bedroom and slipped on a pair of boxers before sliding into the bed. He intended to wait for Ziva but before he knew it, the world had faded away.

He wasn't sure how long he'd slept, but Ziva settling into bed next to him brought him out of his slumber. "Is everything okay?" He muttered.

She chuckled. "After the day we have had? I would say that yes, everything is okay now. Jake is out like a lamp."

Tony grinned to himself. "Light. He's out like a light."

She shrugged. She moved down into her spot until she was on her side facing him, their faces just a few inches apart. He reached out and fingered a curl that was falling down into her face.

"Are you okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned.

She was quiet for a moment. "Yes. I just- I have to learn to adapt to new situations. I cannot blame Somalia for everything that goes bad in my life."

Tony smiled gently. "I used to blame my Dad for all the mistakes I made. It's so much easier to do than face up to what the real problem is." He commented.

She nodded gently. "Parenting is a series of challenges and situations. We have to learn to adapt. So I wanted to breastfeed Jake until I went back to work. It did not work out that way. I will need to face the situation."

Tony thought for a minute. "Like you said, it's only a couple of weeks. There are millions of babies who are never breastfed and turn out just fine. Jake had the opportunity of having over two months of the good stuff."

Ziva smiled. "Yes. And now my breasts are all mine again." She joked.

Tony smiled. "I hope you're planning on sharing."

She laughed and slid to him. He pulled her onto his shoulder and wrapped his arms around her. He slid one hand under her pajama top so he could rub her back. "Are you really okay?"

"As long as you keep holding me like this I will be fine."

They stayed like this for a period of time before the thought struck Tony. "We never did decide if we were going to Stillwater."

Ziva thought for a moment. "It would be nice to get away. We will see how Jake is acting tomorrow."

Tony smiled. "Sounds good. I wouldn't wish our cranky son on anybody."

To Be Continued


	97. Chapter 97

**Thanks again for all the reviews! You're reviews make me smile which in turn makes me want to write even more. I appreciate them all!**

**Disclaimers still apply**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 97**

Amie felt as if she would fall asleep before the key even unlocked her front door. She shuffled in quickly, kicking her shoes off right in the hallway and sighing at the relief her feet instantly felt.

She quickly locked the door behind her before dropping her keys and messenger bag in a heap next to her shoes. She padded down the hallway frowning when she saw a light on in the living room.

It was after 1am. Her brow furrowed when she saw her husband sitting on the sofa, his feet propped on the table in front of him.

"What are you doing up so late?" She asked him.

He shook his head but didn't answer. His face was taunt, his eyes haunted. Amie moved to sit next to him. He leaned over and kissed her gently.

"I love you."

Her brows furrowed again. "Okay, I love you too. John?"

He gestured meekly to the file that was open in his lap. She lifted it from his lap and closed it to see the name on the front.

It was Ziva's medical file from her office.

Amie nodded in understanding. "It's not exactly easy reading, is it?"

"I- You and I have talked about what you went through. And… I guess I get this picture in my head. " His voice trailed off.

She laid her head on his shoulder. "What I went through was nothing like this. For me, it was one event. For Ziva, it was weeks of torture and brutality. I- I almost lost myself so many times just wanting to help her and… just not knowing how to reach her."

John pushed folder from his lap almost as if it was on fire. "I don't even know how she kept her sanity."

"At first she told herself she deserved it. After a while she just shut down completely. Those men did disgusting, vile things to her, and she just separated herself from it all. She would just lie still while they took turns with her body. That's when her captor upped the ante."

He shook his head. "No wonder she reacted the way she did today. I'm assuming it's because of the injuries she sustained that she had trouble conceiving?"

Amie nodded her head. "She was pregnant at one point. She miscarried. They didn't give her any medical attention. Add that on top of the injuries she already had, on top of what they continued to inflict on her… never in a million years did I think she'd even be able to conceive."

"And Tony knows all of this?" He asked softly.

Amie smiled. "Tony's the one who led the team in to rescue her."

"Were they together before?"

Amie shook her head. "No… to be honest, I don't know a lot about their relationship before Somalia. During some of her counseling sessions, Ziva would talk about unrequited love, finding your soul mate in the least likeliest of places, never being able to be with the one she loves… but when I would press her too much she'd sidestep the subject. "

John was quiet for several moments as her laid his head on Amie's. "And now they've built this family together… they're building this life together- in a way, I feel honored that they trust me enough to care for their son."

Amie smiled and turned her face towards John. She kissed his cheek gently. "As hard as it was, I feel like I am a stronger person having known them."

He nodded and pulled her closer to enjoy the moments of quiet before one or both of their pagers went off.

* * *

Tony had woken up while having one of the greatest dreams of his life.

Ziva, how she was years ago, wild and sexually care free, waking him from sleep by fondling him into alertness and readiness. Then without word, she'd climb on top of him and have her way with his all too willing body.

Tony brought his hands to his face when realization struck him… it hadn't been a dream, Ziva really was-

It had been amazing, probably the best Tony could ever remember. Ziva was the aggressor but when she allowed him to take the lead, she whispered softly in his ear and guided him to exactly what she wanted.

One thing had always surprised him about Ziva. All of the years of innuendo and teasing he'd expected Ziva to be more head strong when it came to sex. Sure, she'd take the lead momentarily but for the most part, she'd go along with what he desired.

Not that it bothered him at all. Their sex life was incredible, but he couldn't help but wonder why it was so different than he'd imagined.

Tonight, she'd placed all of those thoughts to rest and then some. She'd barely come down from the high of her climax when she was on him again, begging and prodding him for more. When his body couldn't go any longer, she'd wrapped herself completely around him and begged him to release deep inside of her.

And now minutes later, Tony's breath was just starting to return to normal although his overheated body continued to drip sweat. She was laying on his left shoulder, her leg thrown over his. He could feel her naked body completely pressed against him which was doing nothing to help his thermostat at the moment.

And then he froze. One of his arms was cradling her head and he could have sworn he felt her shoulders shake slightly, almost as if she was crying.

He couldn't see her face as it was nestled into his chest. She was quiet so he figured he'd just imagined it. Suddenly, there is was again.

Tony used his free hand to reach over and hook a finger under her chin, lifting her face so he could see her.

She was definitely crying, a steady line of tears streaming down both cheeks.

He immediately pulled her tighter while cursing himself. "Oh my God Ziva, did I hurt you? Are you okay?"

Oddly enough, she smiled. And not just a small smile, one that shone through her tear stained eyes and erased the worry. She took a breath as if to speak but the tears began to flow harder, causing her voice to hitch. Instead, she tenderly touched his right cheek with her hand and gently kissed his left. She then settled her head back into it's previous position and continued to cry.

He wanted to do something; talk to her, console her, something to make it better. But he had no idea what was bringing this mixed bag of emotions out in her.

After several minutes they heard Jake started to stir on the baby monitor. His little mumbles, grunts and loud sighs was his way of letting them know he was awake. If someone didn't feed him soon he's start to scream loud enough for the neighbors to hear.

Ziva chuckled at the sounds and sat up, wiping her eyes quickly before reaching for her clothes that had ended up across the room.

Her eyes were still red rimmed and her face blotchy, yet she smiled brightly and leaned to kiss his cheek before she disappeared into the hallway to get the baby. Tony was still very worried however Jake was their biggest priority at the moment.

He'd found his boxers at the foot of the bed and slipped them on quickly before going down the hallway. Ziva had Jake in her arms and was talking and smiling to him. Jake's arms were waving wildly, happy to have some human interaction.

By the time Tony had his bottle warmed and had gotten it into Jake's room, he was already started to get cranky. He'd been rooting around the front of Ziva's nightgown, and when he wasn't given what he wanted he was letting his displeasure be known.

Tony quickly handed the bottle to Ziva who slipped it in Jake's frowning mouth before the scream came. His body immediately perked back up when the first taste of warm milk slipped down his throat. His eyes brightened and he focused intently on Ziva.

"Is that good baby, hmmm?" She asked him softly. His hand popped up into the air almost as if to say "Yep, it's all good now Mom". Ziva and Tony both smiled at the gesture.

Once the baby was settled and happily getting his breakfast, Tony pulled up the footstool that matched the rocking chair Ziva was in and sat in front of her. He reached out and gently touched the baby's head before cautiously reaching for Ziva's face. She leaned her face into his hand, allowing him to caress her cheek.

"I am sorry if I worried you." She said softly, focusing on the baby for a moment before turning to him. "I did not expect to become that emotional."

Tony was still at a loss. "What happened?"

Ziva smiled coyly. "Oh, I think you know what happened. You were a willing participant."

He began to scan back through his memory since he woke up. Was he talking in his sleep? Nope, nothing. He was still at a loss to understand.

"All I remember is waking up and being greeted by the most mind-blowing sex EVER!" He jokingly exclaimed trying to lighten the mood.

Although, Ziva didn't seem as if her mood needed to be lightened at all. She smiled and looked down at the baby who reacted to his parent's mood by stretching his ever growing body out before settling back against Ziva.

She shifted her body slightly to accommodate Jake's new position and then it dawned on him.

Her knees where slightly reddened. And they were red because-

"Oh my God, I just realized-" He started and then stopped, not willing to say it in front of the baby. Not that he would understand, or be able to repeat it, but still-

Ziva's cheeks reddened slightly but she smiled. "Yes."

Earlier, Tony had been so focused on Ziva and the amazing things she was doing to him that he didn't even realize. At one point, she's climbed off of him and was on her knees, her back facing him. He's used the momentary break to scramble up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her neck. She's leaned back into him and spread her legs wider, allowing him to enter her from behind.

The one thing she was never able to bring herself to experience with him.

"Oh my God Ziva, I- I'm so proud of you." He said softly, leaning forward in what he meant to be a cheek kiss. She however had other ideas and grabbed his lips with hers.

"I- I thought about what we talked about last night. And it was true. I have been using my experiences from Somalia…. My memories…to hold me back from living my life. I am alive. I survived when those monsters did not. I will NOT allow them to hold me back any longer."

Before Tony could reply Jake had drained the bottle and spit the nipple out. He was watching his parents interaction intently.

Ziva smiled down at him and lifted him up. "Do not even think about it Jacob. You need to get that air out of your belly before Mommy and Daddy are wearing your breakfast."

Tony laughed as Jake smiled up at her, waving his arms before shoving his fists into his mouth. Tony reached out to take him from Ziva. "See, playing the cute card doesn't work on Mommy. Daddy's tried it a million times."

Ziva chuckled and moved from the chair so Tony could sit comfortably to burp the baby. She leaned down and kissed Tony again before disappearing from the room.

Jake burped twice before he finally relaxed against Tony's shoulder. "Wow, that must have been a good meal." Tony commented to him. He moved the baby from his shoulder and to his bare chest allowing Jake to lean into his warmth.

Jake immediately nestled into his Daddy. "Daddy loves you so much buddy. I know I keep telling you that but it's true. When you're older, I know there are going to be times when we argue, when you think I don't love you… but I want to you always remember how much I really do love you. You and your Mommy…. You're my wildest fantasy come to life. Don't ever forget that."

Ziva, now fully clothed in sweat pants and a T-shirt was leaning against the doorway listening. She smiled and moved over to kiss his again. "And you both are my dream come true. I never thought I would ever have this."

Jake lifted his head up briefly to look at Ziva. She smiled and him and reached to take him off of Tony's chest. Tony realized that she'd left Jake's carrier in the hallway and was holding clothes for Tony. She put the clothes on the footstool he'd previously been sitting on.

"Get dressed, we're going out." She ordered.

She walked over to the changing table where she'd previously laid a jumper out to dress Jake in.

"Uh… okay, let me grab a shower."

She shook her head. "No time. Get dressed." She repeated again as she began changing Jake from his pajamas.

Tony began to protest. "But Ziva, I smell like-" He stopped. She turned back to him with a glint in her eyes.

"You smell like sex Tony? Yes, so do I. There isn't time. We are not going out in public." She paused momentarily before speaking slightly more softly. "Please."

Something about the change in her tone prompted him into action. Once the baby was changed, Ziva handed him to Tony and told him to get him buckled into his carrier. Once he had Jake strapped in, Tony went to find out where she'd disappeared to.

He found her in the bedroom, on her hands and knees and rummaging around the deepest back corner on their closet. She shuffled things around before retrieving what it was she was looking for. Tony watched as she pulled out something wrapped in a blue towel. She didn't show it to him or explain, and before he knew what was happening, they were out the door with Ziva driving them out of the parking lot.

Tony immediately recognized the route they were taking. Within minutes, they were pulling into Gibbs' driveway. He was going to comment on the fact that Rivka's car was there this early but thought twice about it.

Ziva took the keys from the ignition and quickly exited the car. Tony hopped out and grabbed the carseat by the carrier handle. Tony had to double step to catch up to Ziva who was still carrying the mystery towel.

As always with Gibbs' home, they didn't bother to knock. Ziva burst through the door and immediately headed across the living room.

Tony came in behind her. Gibbs and Rivka had been in the kitchen and both had come out carrying cups of coffee to see what was going on. Tony made eye contact with them both and gestured as if to say 'I don't know'.

They understood and came into the living room quietly. Rivka took Jake from Tony and unstrapped him so she could lift him into her arms.

Gibbs sat on the edge of the sofa and watched Ziva intently. She's stopped in front of the fireplace and sat on the floor on her knees.

Jake was happily playing with Rivka's hair as she settled onto the sofa next to Gibbs. Tony stood nearby expectantly.

Ziva unwrapped the old towel slowly. Inside was a brown paper bag. She removed it from the towel and placed it on the floor in front of her.

She turned to her family who were watching her silently. "I uh- I kept these… all this time. I did not know why… I could never bring myself to look inside this bag…." She stammered.

Tony moved towards her but stopped when she put her hand in the air. She looked at him gratefully. "I- I have to do this."

He nodded but stood nearby.

She opened the bag and reached into it. She extracted a set of clothing from it; pants and two shirts to be exact.

They watching her in silence yet had confused looks on their faces. She began to unfold the bundle of clothing when realization dawned on Tony.

"Oh my God." He muttered before dropping to his knees in front of her.

That moment would be forever burned into his mind. The weeks of thinking Ziva was dead was the worst of his life. That moment she was pushed into the chair in front of him and that hood ripped off her head would forever be ingrained into his memory.

Now, here she was sitting in front of him holding the clothes she was wearing that day. Ziva held the pants and the black shirt up for Gibbs and Rivka to see. "These… these are the clothes I was wearing when I marched into Saleem's camp in Somalia."

Rivka's mind immediately flashed back to the DVD Eli had given her… the sight of her daughter being touched by those men… them tearing at her clothes before Rivka could take no more and ran from the room.

And now… here she was sitting a few feet in front of her with the very same clothes.

Silent tears escaped Ziva's eyes. She dropped the clothes to quickly wipe the tears away. She reached for the second shirt, one lighter colored with longer sleeves.

"This… this was Saleem's. He forced me to wear it on one of the few occasions they allowed me to have clothing. He said he was tired of me trembling like a scared child."

She smiled sadly. "I do not know if I was trembling from fright or from the fever I was running. I… I had miscarried a few days before… infection had set in."

Everyone in the room was silent. Jake had noticed the tension in the room and turned in Rivka's arms so he was facing the center of the action. He didn't understand what was happening, but could feel the shift of emotions. Almost as if he wanted everyone to be happy again, he looked straight at Ziva and laughed. It was the first time he'd ever done it as far as they all knew.

Ziva's eyes filled with tears again… this time from the magic that Jake had brought into her life. She tossed the clothes onto the floor and crawled over to him. "Thank you sweetheart." She whispered to him placing a kiss on his head.

He looked at her again and laughed, loving the reaction he was getting. Tony watched in amazement realizing what had prompted Jake to lighten the room. 'You really are a special kid.' He thought.

Ziva moved back in front of the fireplace and scooped up the clothing. She looked directly at Tony. "When you rescued me and brought me back… I had nothing. When I was discharged from the hospital they gave me a pair of scrubs to wear. Director Vance had arranged for my room at the Navy Lodge. I had the clothes on my back, a voucher for a free cab ride, and these." She gestured to the clothing.

Everyone was quiet again. Jake was sucking on his fingers all the while trying to gage the mood of the room. Ziva watched him quietly for a moment.

"Josh swooped in and saved the day. He gave me a credit card to use for clothing and food. He also helped me get an apartment and furnishings. But something inside of me always made me hold onto these."

Forgetting that Gibbs and Rivka were in the room, Ziva spoke directly to Tony. " I always felt like I had these ties from Somalia wrapped around me. No matter what I did they were always there. With you… ever since you came to the hospital after Jake was born… it felt like those bonds were loosening, slowly but surely. Yesterday, my first reaction to not being able to breastfeed anymore was to blame Saleem. My realization that I was using my experience in Somalia as a crutch made those bonds loosen even more. "

She used her free hand to reach over and touch Tony's cheek. "And this morning…. With you…. I felt them break and fall away. I am free Tony. I am finally free."

Jake was the only person in the room with dry eyes. Gibbs placed a supportive arm around Rivka and quickly stabbed at the moisture threatening to run down his cheeks. Tony pushed the clothing away and pulled a very willing Ziva into his arms. They cried together for several moments before separating again.

Tony now understood why she wanted to come here. He stood and grabbed a match from the fireplace mantle. Despite the fact that it was the beginning of Summer outside, Tony lit the fireplace. The crackle of the burning wood filled the room for several moments.

Ziva look Tony's hand and squeezed it. He looked at her. She said one word:

"Together?"

He nodded. In perfect unison, they each took one piece of clothing and threw it into the fireplace. The fire would roar until the cloth was turned to ash. They repeated this over and over again until the clothing, the bag and even the towel they were wrapped in was nothing but ash.

Tony brought her into his arms again and clung to her for several moments. Rivka and Gibbs watched them silently, grateful that Ziva loved them enough to allow them to be part of this moment.

Jake began to get restless in the silence. He began to squirm and then suddenly a sound emanated from his diaper that brought everyone's attention to him. Gibbs smiled.

"Ziver, what did I tell you about letting Jake grow up to act like Tony?" He joked.

Ziva chuckled and pulled herself away from Tony. She looked around the room and cringed. "We left the diaper bag in the car."

Rivka lifted the baby and sniffed. "False alarm. At least for now."

Tony smiled. Checking that the fire was beginning to burn down, he stood and reach out two hands, helping Ziva to her feet.

Ziva reached out and took Jake from her Mother. "Well, he had shots yesterday which may have upset his belly a little. We'd better get him home so you two can start your day."

She started buckling Jake back into his carrier. Tony glanced around the living room for a moment when he noticed a plastic tarp covering one of the walls.

"Doing some construction Boss?" He asked.

Rivka glanced at Gibbs who shrugged. "Nah. Old house. Leaky pipes."

Tony nodded and began moving towards the door. "What time do you want us to meet you here tomorrow?"

Gibbs shrugged. "The drive to Stillwater isn't that long. About ten hundred hours?"

Tony nodded and opened the door. Ziva kissed her Mother and Gibbs' cheek before exiting with the baby. Tony went out behind her and gently closed the door.

Rivka fell into Gibbs' arms and let out all of the emotions she'd been trying hard to hold in. Gibbs consoled her and rubbed her hair until she had let it out.

"That's one amazing kid we've got there." He whispered to her.

To Be Continued


	98. Chapter 98

**Hi everyone, remember me? (Looking sheepish)**

**Hopefully, with the weather here turning cold, I'll have more time to write. All of the recent reviews I've received by people just finding this story for the first time, or were missing it and writing to give me a swift kick in the butt have helped. So, thank you to all of you, and "Welcome!" to all new readers who have just found this 'little' story.**

**Reviews always help, and even though I don't get a chance to reply to them always know that I appreciate everyone who takes the time out to leave a kind work.**

**This chapter is a little shorter than what I normally post. It's actually one larger chapter that I decided to split into two for storyline reasons. (wink)**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 98**

"I have a tile imprint on my ass."

Ziva chuckled at Tony's words but made no attempt to move.

Once they'd returned from Gibbs' house, they'd spent a wonderful day together with Jake. He was slightly out of sorts but was still full of smiles and laughs that caused his parents to fall even deeper in love with him.

Tony was chagrined when the realization started to set in that he had to return to work in a few days. He was intent to spend every waking moment with Jake that he could. He even asked Ziva "What if he forgets me during the day?" She'd smiled gently reassured him that he wouldn't be forgotten.

Once the baby was bathed, fed and down for the night, Ziva had returned to clean up the mess they'd made in the kitchen while preparing dinner. Tony had gone in to shower. He'd snuck up behind Ziva who was rinsing dishes at the sink. He slid his arms around her waist and wasn't surprised when she didn't startle at all.

"I guess your ninja senses heard me coming, huh?" He teased before gently kissing the side of her head.

She'd leaned back into his warmth, turning her head to kiss him. He gladly obliged but had to stop and smile when he realized she had taken his hands and was guiding them towards the waistband of her pants.

"Feeling frisky tonight Ninja?" He whispered as his hand slipped under the lace trim of her panties and began stroking her pleasure point.

"Mmm Hmm" she'd purred leaning into his touch.

And now, here they were, over an hour later and lying together completely naked on their kitchen floor. Their clothes were strewn everywhere. Tony thought he saw one of his socks partially sticking out of the now cold dishwater.

"It's easy for you to laugh; it's not your ass." He grumbled although half-heartedly. "Next time, I'm on top." He complained.

She smiled and moved her head off of his chest and smiled at him. "Next time? I do not think so."

His brow furrowed. "Oh, come on Ziva, you gotta admit… that was pretty great!"

"I am not denying that. But Tony, how long do you think we will be able to do things like this? In a few months Jake will be walking-"

"Hoo, no no no… Jake's eyes can NOT be exposed to his parents like THAT- he'll be scarred for life." Tony joked.

She laughed. "Well, hopefully he will not learn how to climb out of his crib."

"I did… or so I was told." Tony commented.

Ziva smiled. "So did I."

"I guess putting a lock on his door so his parents can have hot sex in the kitchen isn't considered good parenting?" He joked.

She laughed. "Not when the lock would have to be on the outside. That might raise a few eyebrows."

She gently started to climb off of him and stand. He continued to lie on the floor and watched lecherously as she stood naked above him.

"Come on-"She offered putting her hands out to help him stand.

"Aww, I want to stay here and enjoy the view." He complained.

She dropped her hands. "Fine. But I am going to shower. If you do not want to share that is fine by me."  
She spun on her heel and began sauntering towards the bathroom. Before she'd even had a chance to turn and close the door Tony was behind her again causing her to laugh.

He was quickly convinced that the only reason Ziva wanted a shower was to play. They'd barely separated long enough to wash and rinse before she was touching and stroking him again. She was definitely feeling frisky tonight. Tony would have to double up his vitamin intake if this kept up.

They took turns drying each other off before she quickly dropped the towel and began kissing him, all the while leading him from the bathroom to the bedroom. She gently tossed him onto the bed and was on him again. His body responded instantly to her ministrations and all Tony could do was thank every God that would listen for the gorgeous creature who was now riding him hard, her hands leaned back on his knees to get a better angle. He used his large hands to slowly trace her thighs. His hands met at her apex and he used both thumbs to begin stroking her.

She exploded around him moments before her erupted inside of her. Her sweat slicked body collapsed on top of him.

'Please Jake; do NOT wake up anytime soon.' Tony begged silently before his body finally gave in and he began to doze. He woke slightly when she stirred just enough to pull the blankets over them.

"We need another shower." He murmured.

She snorted. "Later- maybe in a month when I recover." She joked.

The sound of his own chuckle lulled him into sleep.

* * *

The following morning was a mess. They time they were supposed to spend the prior night packing for their trip went to their.. other excursions, so they were in a mad dash to get everything together and packed this morning. Added to the fact was that they had to now finish the dinner dishes and scrub the counter… and the floor.

They arrived at Gibbs ten minutes late which immediately caused glares from the older man. Rivka just rolled her eyes at him. "Oh yes, because I'm sure he was ALWAYS on time all the time when Kelly was an infant."

Tony and Ziva froze and stared at her teasing use of Kelly's name. They expected Gibbs to react angrily. Instead he smirked at her and went to talk to the baby through the back door of the SUV.

The younger couple exchanged a glance, realizing that apparently, Rivka had reached places within Gibbs that hadn't been touched since Shannon and Kelly's death. Maybe… just maybe she was what he needed to finally, truly heal.

He reappeared. "We'll stop halfway to give you a chance to get the baby out and stretch. You never know how they can react on long car rides."

Tony and Ziva nodded. "We already talked about it. I will sit in the backseat with him just in case." Ziva explained.

"Hurt your hand Boss?" Tony asked, realizing the Gibbs had a bandage on his left hand.

Gibbs shrugged it off. "Just a small cut. But someone around here thinks that I'm a candyass and can't take care of a little cut."

Rivka crossed her arms in a manner that Tony had seen all too many times from Ziva. "Small cut? It bled for over five minutes. You needed stitches." She stepped closer to Gibbs. "I'm just trying to keep your 'candyass' in one piece."

Tony and Ziva realized that the bandage was the compromise in what must have been one hell of an argument. Once both vehicles were packed, they pulled out of Gibbs' driveway and headed north.

Little did they know that this trip would change their lives forever.

To be continued


	99. Chapter 99

**OMG, the reviews! (flailing mercilessly)**

**Ahem, thank you all so much. Since everyone did their part, I thought I'd be nice and be the next chapter up. =)**

**And here's what was originally the second half of the previous chapter. Although it's again short, I think they worked better as 2 chapters.  
**

**Disclaimers still apply.**

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**"Just One More" Chapter 99**

Two and a half minutes.

That was all it took for Jake to have Jackson wrapped around his little finger.

The adult's apprehension on taking the baby on the long car trip proved to be unfounded. Jake had fallen asleep by the time they'd hit the interstate. He woke up at the rest stop long enough for a diaper change and to let everyone dote over him. Once the truck was started and they were back on the road again, he was out like a light. Ziva, realizing that Jake was unfazed by the road trip, spent the rest of the ride in the front seat with Tony.

By the time they'd arrived in Stillwater he was bright eyed and ready to go. He was watching out the window curiously as they drove slowly through the streets of the sleepy town. Tony and Ziva were playing a game of imagining all of the crazy things Gibbs did in this town as a youngster.

At one point, someone caught Ziva's eye. She'd turned to see someone entering a clothing store on Main Street.

"Tony, was that Eden?" She asked curiously.

"Eden? Where?" He asked keeping an eye on the road ahead.

"She just went into that store-"Her voice trailed off when she realized the likelihood of Eden ever being in a town like this. "Never mind. It was not her. My mind is playing tricks on me."

Tony stopped the SUV at a traffic light and watched with amusement as a John Deere tractor crossed the street in front of them. Her turned to her and grinned. "Maybe you're just tired?"

She too was watching the tractor. She didn't turn to him but she began to smile. "It was worth it, yes?" She asked turning her face to him suddenly.

"Yeah!" Tony said, almost with too much enthusiasm which caused Ziva to laugh slightly. They parked behind Gibbs in front of Jackson's store. Ziva had Jake in her arms and was congratulating him on being such a good boy by the time Gibbs and Rivka had joined them. Tony grabbed the car seat off of its base and Jake's diaper bag.

Jackson was behind the counter leaning on it when they came through the door.

" 'Bout time you got here!" He called out, clearly aiming the jab at his son.

Gibbs smirked. "We had to take our time Dad."

Jackson came out from the behind the counter and focused his attention on Jake. Ziva turned him in her arms so that he was sitting in the crook of her arm facing Jackson.

"Well, I see you've been busy since I last saw you." He said in greeting to Ziva. "What's your name little one?"

Ziva smiled. "His name is Jacob."

Jackson stared at the baby's face intently. Jake watched him just as closely. Suddenly without warning, Jake broke into a large, toothless smile. It was infectious and spread to all of the adults in the room.

"He's a happy little bugger." Jackson said which caused Jake to laugh uncontrollably for several seconds. He was so amused by Jackson that he kicked his little legs and bounced up and down in Ziva's arms.

Tony could see Jackson's whole demeanor change. He reached out a finger and tickled Jake's belly which was a sure fire way to get a reaction from the baby. Jake squealed and kicked his legs again as he laughed.

Gibbs smiled and shook his head, watching at how easy Jake commanded the attention of the room. 'It's got to be that DiNozzo DNA' he thought all the while his heart overflowing for the love that developed for their makeshift family.

Jackson stood upright and turned his attention to Rivka. "So, you must be the one who's been commanding all of my son's attention lately."

Rivka shrugged. "Oh, I don't know about that. We just try not to kill each other. It seems to work." She joked which caused Jackson to grin slightly. Gibbs was immediately chagrined at the attention Jackson was paying to Rivka and interjected.

"Take it easy Dad." He warned.

Jackson was undeterred, but instead of pressing the issue he turned his teasing in Tony's direction. "I bet Leroy smacked you silly for getting her pregnant with no ring on her finger." Tony was taken back unsure of what to say at first. Rivka tossed a look at Gibbs who studied the situation curiously.

"Well, uh… there is a ring on her finger just not-"Tony stammered. Jackson chuckled and moved slowly across the store to sit in a chair at the table. He reached his hands out obviously expecting Jake to be placed in them.

Ziva placed Jake in his arms but stood nearby in case the older man needed help. Jake was studying his own hands at first, and then decided to study Jackson's. He eventually settled on patting Jackson's hands with his which amused him to no end. Another round of toothless smiles followed by a mixture of laughter and squealing continued to entertain the room.

Gibbs moved closer to his Dad who was now completely enamored by the baby. "How are things Dad?"

Gibbs and Rivka shared a look that raised suspicion in both Tony and Ziva. "They're good son." Jackson reluctantly handed Jake back to Ziva and stood, using his cane to make his way back to the counter. He grabbed his keys from behind the counter and moved back towards the group.

"Come on. I'll show you."

They slowly made their way out to the sidewalk and waited for Jackson to put the 'Closed' sign on the door before he locked it. Tony pulled Jake's stroller out of the SUV and snapped the car seat onto it. Jake laid quietly inside wearing a small blue baseball cap and white sunglasses that had suddenly appeared in their apartment one day. The canopy was pulled over to protect him from the sun.

They walked for a few minutes until they came to a Colonial style house with a picket fence and wrap around porch. Gibbs opened the front gate and allowed everyone through. Instead of walking up the steps to the front door he led them around the house and into the backyard. Tony and Ziva froze the moment they turned around the corner. They seriously doubted that the backyard looked like this all the time.

There were several rows of chairs lined up facing the façade of a wedding chuppah. Tony and Ziva froze and turned to look at Gibbs and Rivka.

"What-?" Ziva started to ask.

Her mother took a deep breath. "Welcome to your wedding." She said hopefully.

To Be Continued


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